▶ Full Post Text
[+35] u/abroadbroadband: You gotta admit, we're learning hella geography because of this guy
Strait of Hormuz
Island of Kharg
Where will we go next?
[+32] u/Curious_scientist420: #In case you missed it
[Kharg Island in Iran appears to have been attacked, hours before Trump’s ‘deadline’ for the country to reopen the Strait of Hormuz arrives, Iranian media is reporting.](https://metro.co.uk/2026/04/07/several-large-explosions-heard-kharg-island-hours-trump-deadline-27883811)
> Attacks on bridges throughout Iran also appear to have begun, with the deputy governor of Qom citing a US-Israeli attack on a bridge outside of Qom, the city where Mojtaba Khamenei reportedly is.
> Iran’s Revolutionary Guard Corps has issued a warning to other countries after the strikes on Kharg Island, saying ‘Restraint is Over’.
They said they will target the US and its allies’ infrastructure in the region and disrupt regional oil and gas supplies ‘for years’.
[+32] u/Wowmuchrya: Mango: No deal we attack
Iran: No deal we attack
Market: Lol there’s gona be a deal! YAY!
This is beyond next level delusion.
[+25] u/According-Page8618: funny how this market didnt move for 6months and then lost 10% in 1 month, most stocks being down -20% or even most of MAG7 are down big from oct, but now when the MOST obvious no deal/escalation is coming up, the market refuses to go down? market truely regarded
[+22] u/aahidboss: WARNING: "From now on, certain considerations regarding good neighborliness and self-restraint have ended. We will deal with the infrastructure of the United States and its partners in the Persian Gulf in such a way that they will be deprived of the region's oil and gas for years" - Iran's IRGC
Yikes, we are actually so cooked
[+22] u/Actual_Mycologist859: Why Iranian are not happy about being bombed?
[+18] u/collegefootballfan69: IRGC says if you volunteer to defend Kharg Island you get free gas for life.
[+18] u/UnivalveX: shit turned from Operation Epstein Fury to Operation Open the Fuckin' Strait real quick
[+17] u/aahidboss: Attacks on Kharg and bridges already? It is so Joever
[+17] u/youdirtyhoe: Orange mans ego is to big to taco out of this one.
Im afraid.
[+16] u/BarbellPadawan: This is so insane. Either market should be quite a bit lower or oil should be quite a bit higher. But both stable, both green, or whatever the fuck has been happening makes no sense at all.
[+16] u/Agreeable_Leg_1046: They're Eating the Gas! They're Eating the Oil!
[+15] u/ImJoeontheradio: Getting fired from my job has really helped me save money on gas.
[+15] u/Bam2458: When I was a little kid I always dreamt one day I would spend hours watching vessel traffic in the Strait of Hormuz online.
[+15] u/Chiinoe: 30 minutes before opening
"Strikes are complete. A new wave of peace will commence."
SPY +3%
[+15] u/Kalaka: We’re more done than a white girls steak at chilis
[+14] u/Rounder221: Time in the strait beats timing the strait
[+14] u/Due-Dirt-8428: I’d be hilarious if they were sending Iranian officials money to try and bribe them and they still say fuck off lmao
[+13] u/greyenlightenment: this is going to go on all year. just more threats ,delays, strait closed, oil >$100 , market somehow makes new highs anyway
[+13] u/orsomeshitidk: Yall bitch in here about how political the thread has gotten but I’m sick of how political SPY is dog. Dude is the main driver of price action and nothing else really even matters. Bulls jerking off fo if the whole time. Disgusting.
[+12] u/XorAndNot: What a lovely day, hope things go well for everyone.
[+12] u/Frozen_Shades: Ever take a shit and then afterwards you want to go back to bed?
[+12] u/Threebridges2: EXPLOSIONS CONFIRMED ON KHARG ITS HAPPENING
[+12] u/knoqd_: > 🚨 *US CONDUCTED STRIKES ON MILITARY TARGETS ON KHARG ISLAND: AXIOS
For Allah
[+11] u/GittingerFredl: 2:24h until market open. So you could still be watching the hunger games (runtime 2:22) before open to have an optimistic outlook on future before making your first trade.
[+11] u/yyn1999: BUY THE DIP LAST CHANCE BEFORE WE CRASH 20%
[+11] u/Paul_Robert_: Due to the current economy, I have switched to using thinner straws, so as to make my green tea appear to last longer. Yes I drink green tea from a straw.
[+11] u/According-Page8618: karg island attack and we are back to... prices not seen 3 hours ago!
[+11] u/Express-Initiative-8: regards are fuk. Bol and Ber, both fuk.
[+11] u/TechnologyEven6926: 🚨 QATAR FOREIGN MINISTRY SPOKESPERSON: WE ARE CLOSE TO THE POINT WHERE THE SITUATION IN THE REGION COULD SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL
[+10] u/KarlLachsfeld: They pump AND dump before market is even open.
[+10] u/MrYOLOMcSwagMeister: They are calling it the most extended ultimatum of all time folks! Nobody moves deadlines like I do, everybody is saying this! And the markets, they keep falling for it every time, frankly, it's hard to believe, but they do. Praise be to Allah!
[+10] u/LasyKuuga: Me dreaming about a goth gf 🤝 SPY
Completely detached from reality
[+10] u/Ok-Art6659: Why would Obama let this happen?
[+10] u/Bonkers119: Iran: we reject your ceasefire.
🥭: what if I give you 72 hours?
[+10] u/unique_ptr: computah, make this market super gay and horny
[+10] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: if you don’t see liquidity, you ARE the liquidity
trade safe my friends
[+10] u/ThinkingOfTheOldDays: Took out a loan to expand the money supply.
I'm doing my part 🫡
[+10] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Dear American regards,
If this shit on Kharg goes sideways, and they cut your internet connection, just know it was nice meeting you all
[+10] u/Gloomy_Necesary: I was banned by reddit all weekend so I couldn’t type here but I wanted to say yesterdays pump is genuinely one of the most regarded things I have ever seen
[+10] u/octopus4488: Why is Biden doing this to me???
[+9] u/Harp-Note: Portfolio today, probably
https://preview.redd.it/fw5alhhv2rtg1.png?width=498&format=png&auto=webp&s=04468e42b235df19d6e16a83fa2f855b0e28494b
[+9] u/jasperCrow: Iran disappears tonight?
[+9] u/Hist0racle: I swear every post in the prediction market subs is a scam. Its all bots or morons trying to push some sort of copy bot. How does reddit allow this lol
[+8] u/StrangeInsanity: A nuclear bomb could go off and the market would say “bottom is in”.
[+8] u/Roxorek: 🥭 and yahoo need to be locked up asap
too dangerous for the world
2 absolute regards
[+8] u/chainerection: STOP SHORTING NFLX, YOU CRAZY FUCKING BASTARDs.
[+8] u/Broad-Belt-5888: Look like war crimes are back on the menu boys
[+8] u/magpie_bird: shit's flat as a pancake at 0.4%, why is everyone freaking the fuck out
[+8] u/Capt_Chickenpox: I uhh, would have expected more movement on the price of oil, considering the news
[+8] u/Mark_Underscore: Jihad Don is losing his marbles.
[+8] u/abroadbroadband: I like my women like I like my military targets:
Critical for the transportation and storage of oil
# 😳
[+8] u/YamRepresentative663: Bulls are fuk. But sadly i am one of them 🥹
[+8] u/urfatfatfat: Iran can destroy the salinization plants along the west coast of the persian gulk taking drinking water away from saudi arabia
[+8] u/awetfartruinedmylife: Is bin salman still pressing for continuing the war? Does he enjoy drinking fresh water?
[+8] u/Fun-Age-5749: heute the bulls will be fucked
[+8] u/talaabo: why is the stock market not down 20-30%? The damage that was done last 3 days is going to impact global oil supply for at least 3 years. This is wild!
[+8] u/Superente_: So the situation is 100 times worse than it was 2 weeks ago, but we are still 30 Points higher than we were 2 weeks ago? And we are also not drilling on the worst news imaginable? This market fucking sucks. I give up.
[+7] u/Wowmuchrya: Retard bulls were happy about +0.00002% fake futures LMAO
[+7] u/chargedcapacitor: Dip, pump! Dip pump!
Do you know the effect this kind of volatility has on a man?
[+7] u/_Doomer_Wojack_: Coming to a theatre near you ..
“Escape Kharg Island”
Starring Emily Blunt and John Krasinski
Or..
Starring: The Rock and Jack Black
[+7] u/InIce1234: Strait of good memes.
[+7] u/jda823: Let it dump, buy calls, wait for truth post. Sell.
[+7] u/Fun-Age-5749: i told you 1000x times, and i told you again, there was no reason to be green at all, spy and oil cant be both that high up, one of them have to fall, and since the strait is closed therefore spy is gonna fall, its just takes time
[+7] u/Microwave-Dave: Has he analysed all the sand yet?
[+7] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: We'll be fighting Iran for a while, a new administration will get into power. We'll claim victory and fly away. Leaving North Iran and South Iran. One controlled by Sunnis, one controlled by Shias. One allied with the East, the other allied with the west.
!Remindme 10 years.
[+7] u/borkdpasito: It’s quiet…. Too quiet
[+7] u/borkdpasito: Houthis shut Red Sea incoming?
[+7] u/Level_Counter3062: Don't worry they don't let markets crash anymore you are safe
[+7] u/Suspicious_Ad6172: The highlight of my morning is watching this brunette jog down the road with her ponytail bouncing. Makes my pp hard
[+7] u/WalrusHonda: the only thing bullish about this market is that there’s a lot of Open interest on Puts right now
[+7] u/aahidboss: BREAKING: The U.S. & Israel are bombing bridges, railways & power transmission lines today in Iran. They are prepping for a ground invasion after their FAILED Isfahan uranium heist...
Yep, it is gonna be a bloodbath....
[+7] u/Spy300: Going to lose the reserve currency over this obvious stealth default
[+7] u/Unlikely-Evening2919: I hope you guys understand it is completely over for the US economy.
Who knows what happens today or tomorrow. But 6 months from now, your stocks will be a LOT lower. And oil MUCH higher,
[+7] u/Zealousideal_Lock789: Drill team 6 has entered the chat 📉
[+6] u/Smart_Influence2966: When you shit your pants and the whole world has to smell it 🤢
[+6] u/AndItsThetaAgain: I kicked a shark in the head while swimming in the Persian gulf
You can’t hurt me
[+6] u/A55BAG: Bessent, close your fuckin' oil short, you crazy bastard!
[+6] u/I_am_Nerman: There were over 100 US/Israeli aircraft lighting up Iran. That's a lot of birds in the sky
[+6] u/AndItsThetaAgain: ‘Wars are bullish’ only works if you win the war and you are in good standing in your economy
We all know how this goes. We’re repeating the recession/Bush oil war side quest
Only makes sense if you have an inflation problem & employment problem and a population of angry young men prone to overthrowing their governments that you need to send to war
How could we possibly have seen this coming…
[+6] u/Ok-Indication-3754: Don’t worry oil isn’t at $150 yet
[+6] u/Bxdwfl: at this point, they should just have a department of war twitch channel
[+6] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: #attention all my little gambling addict regards!
i proclaim today to be a THETA DAY
[+6] u/Infamous-Ad-8215: Green by open. +3% today
[+6] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: Its been 10 goddamn days since i made the deposit robinhood, where is my gambling money? Show me my money!
[+6] u/Defiant-Fee-7550: 'Mom, is the basement empty ?' - a crypto bro 😦🤌
[+6] u/Roxorek: idk sp500 is trading at levels when oil was at \~$60, and now oil is at $115
shorting opportunity or stonks only go up?
[+6] u/Euphoric_Present8838: Why is every website or app UI complete shit lately?
[+5] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: You guys remember the Mango parades of big trucks with flags and shit all over em?
With these gas prices we likely wont see that ever again.
Just one more thing the Iranians took from us.
[+5] u/According-Page8618: trump for fun attacking kharg island to announce taco in 1 hour
[+5] u/horseisahorse: still time for bullshit axios headline before the inevitable retaliation
[+5] u/brute-forced: Back to calls on caskets
[+5] u/Impressive_Moose_127: no eye ran oil already priced in
[+5] u/puts_every_day: People think this drop is because of Iran, but it's actually because Anthrophic announced they are switching away from Nvidia to Google TPUs built by AVGO. Oil price bearly moved
[+5] u/Fatt-Elvis: Thank god it's TACO Tuesday and not Thursday. Otherwise WW3
[+5] u/Regenbooggeit: This is going to ruin the tour!
[+5] u/Worried_Quarter469: We still have big beautiful coal it’s fine
[+5] u/greyenlightenment: just short btc instead of puts. much easier $
[+5] u/Frozen_Shades: I looked away for 20 minutes and the premarket died?!?!?
Did I imagine a green premarket?
[+5] u/Dangerous_Pie_3338: Did the straight of Hormel pepperoni not open or something?
[+5] u/Broad-Belt-5888: Spy $600 by April 17th. Praise be to Allah
[+5] u/According-Page8618: watch trump tweet "we striked them big and theyre completly destroyed! Iran is too dumb to negotiate, they have no power left, we are not wasting more ammo on a dead target. we are concluding this operation! thank you for your attention!" on the deadline and the strike referenced being the one on kharg island
[+5] u/Level_Counter3062: Markets don't crash anymore because that means your puts would make you money which they deem illegal
[+5] u/kodaksdad2020: Oil hit 116 and spy still didn’t break the uptrend line
[+5] u/Frozen_Shades: Found out why ghosts are always moaning in the movies. People don't die quietly.
Shout out to morphine though. Shout out to morphine....
[+5] u/MoleMan199: Don Jr is probably giving him advice right now. We are so fkt
[+5] u/QuantrixQuintrix: obv we expect max bearish selloff and you know we are getting theta or up after the dealine as it will be priced in.
[+5] u/One-Ratio-5834: Wait it’s Tuesday, has he taco’d yet??
[+5] u/0xBorisjohnson: Went all in end of March and entirely back to cash gang about three hours ago, now I just need Israel to nuke the Pyramids and Trump to bomb some orphanages and I can probably call this the trade of my life
[+5] u/Fhyzikz: Schrodinger's strait
[+38] u/Long_Dong_Silver6: Could've just given every adult in the U.S. $2,500 to spend on options instead of wasting that money attacking Iran
[+24] u/Loose_Stool_12: We're gonna get ww3 before gta6
[+24] u/Acceptable_Eagle_775: "We can't tell the enemy our plans" "We're gonna blow up your power pants & bridges at 8pm" 🤣
[+23] u/claytondpark: Going FULL cash gang today before I end up as someone's exit fuk this mkt
[+22] u/justgivejtawaaaaaay: Dude is treating this war like a season finale of a show
[+22] u/Potential_Version_34: Fires on Kharg Island
And media still speculating on a deal
[+21] u/Sudden-County-7159: An entire civilization gonna die tonight , SPY down .5% 🦔
[+21] u/xXFoxyGrandpaXx: Lmao watch taco be like “You guys drive a hard bargain. I’ll give you ONE MORE WEEK. PRESIDENT DJT”
[+21] u/Late-Combination5060: The year is 2035. Donald Trump Jr. Is president. Eric Trump is vice president. Barron & Melania are married and run the Senate. Iran has supplied Venezuela, Cuba and Greenland with hypersonic missiles with the help of Russia and China. Israel has been destroyed. Jesus comes down from the sky and defeats Satan, the rapture occurs , the end.
That's only 9 years of investing left. That's investment advice.
[+21] u/Ht0wn713: Holy shit they really just bombed Kharg Island 👀
[+20] u/RFKsBrainwormm: OPEN THE STRAIT TODAY OR ELSE YOU BETTER OPEN THE STRAIT ON FRIDAY, IM VERY SERIAL THIS TIME
[+20] u/trsx5: "A whole civilization will die tonight" is a step too far. Don't care what your side is.
[+20] u/SergeantThreat: Do I think Iran has the capability to really beat the US and make life for Americans a living hell? No.
Do I think they have the ability to mildly inconvenience the average American? Yes. And to the average American mild inconvenience is a living hell.
[+19] u/Objective-Plenty5185: US DIDN'T INTENTIONALLY TARGET KHARG ISLAND LANDING DOCKS: FOX
US TARGETS INCLUDED BUNKERS, RADAR STATION AMMO STORAGE: FOX
GG
[+19] u/SwolePalmer: Oil is about to be so expensive that guzzling cocaine and running everywhere is going to be cheaper. Fun times ahead!
(Stolen from somewhere, or dreamt, I don’t remember)
[+19] u/Diamondhands4dagainz: Mango tweeting that a whole civilisation is gunna die tonight and the Market shakes it off LOL
[+19] u/Ok_Advantage_8153: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+19] u/civillyRange: 🥭 on Iran: A whole civilisation will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don't want that to happen, but it probably will. - Truth Social
Time for 25th amendment Jesus christ
[+18] u/nthnreallymatters: inflation? bullish
global war with no end in sight? bullish
layoffs? bullish
supply chains disrupted? bullish
superintelligence replacing every business? bullish
[+18] u/stemh18: ‘Deadline extended, talks going well’ etc
Any second now. You guys are morons.
[+18] u/ripcord51: happy power plants and bridges day for those who celebrate
[+18] u/mks_csw: "a whole civilisation of options holders will die tonight"
[+18] u/Ahthongkorkor: what a thing to even say. horrible human being.
[+17] u/iMakeGOODinvestmemts: BREAKING: Trump on Iran: a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don't want that to happen, but it probably will.
Uhhh wtf
[+17] u/Significant_Speed854: Futures barely respond to a psychopathic, genocidal tweet. WTF
[+17] u/Muted-South4737: A whole port is going to die tonight...I don't want that to happen, but it probably will.
[+17] u/Atti_: a whole civilization will die tonight, now get back to work
[+17] u/CapnCurt81: You guys are too dumb to see the master plan here. Kill off EVs and renewable energy. Then destroy oil and gas supply. It’s beautiful clean coal time baby, I already preordered the new Tesla SteamCar™.
[+16] u/Infamous-Mixture8278: Genuinely this market is so dogshit it’s unbelievable
[+16] u/SmoothFlan0: This chat is my news source no wonder i don't make amy money
[+16] u/Boromir-Wants-: This time line is fucked. Everyday I wake up with a headline and say, wow that’s a big deal only to wake the next day to something more outlandish than the previous.
[+16] u/BFox1982: Saying a whole civilization will die then saying God Bless the people in that same civilization is top tier.
[+16] u/Wrath_FMA: What the actual fuck Trump
[+16] u/arbitraryBlue: "I don't want it to happen"
bro, you're in charge
[+16] u/Gortecz: Thats not TACO. We're cooked ☠️
[+15] u/Effective_Dog3089: My friend told me I’m so gooned out he can’t see light in my eyes anymore
[+15] u/PossumImposter2: The market is so sure of a TACO that they bombed Karg Island and we went up.
[+15] u/TheScourgeOfHumanity: Bruh. He's out of his goddamn mind
[+15] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: That post is utterly fucking deranged btw
[+15] u/Mother-Bottle9962: Trump is obviously bluffing. high chance he'll say iran is negotiating
[+15] u/kcramthun: "AN ENTIRE CIVILIZATION DIES TONIGHT"
I know there's basically a 0% he uses nukes (probably) but he's definitely thought about it. Maybe joked about it and the rest of the room does that nervous laugh as they wonder what we're wondering lol
[+15] u/R1ckyB0bby_: January: complains about not getting the Nobel peace prize
April: threatens genocide
[+14] u/ShittyUsernane1222: 🥭's seventh Bankruptcy will be the US and 🥭's eight bankruptcy will be wsb perma bulls.
[+14] u/xeemyy: The only strait that’s gonna be open is the Straight to my anoose
[+14] u/CATLLM: Why is vix still so low? So dumb
[+14] u/Level_Ad8089: We will all be riding bicycles thanks to Trump. Maybe Trump is the biggest woke
[+14] u/Agitated-Lobster-623: Remember during covid when Americans were asked to not stand three inches from the person in front of them at the check out line and like half of Americans had a schizophrenic break down?
I don't want to see our reaction to whatever the fallout of this will be. I'm betting it's gonna be even more regarded
[+14] u/DefiantDelta: that truth should be circuit breaking. so sick of the underreaction
[+14] u/clouts1: This lunatic said a whole civilization will die, and then said God bless the people of Iran lmao how is he the president of the United States lmao
[+13] u/Hungry-Brain-3287: Kharg Island getting bombed out was priced in.
[+13] u/phagebiscotti: Explosions on Kharg Island, multiple bridges attacked across Iran, and Iran’s Revolutionary Guard said from now on they will not be exercising the same restraint that they have been while picking American targets to retaliate—all with 12 hours to go and no deal made before the deadline.
SPY still remains flat for the month
[+13] u/Frequent-Nature-630: cocaine and gambling today, thank you for attention to this matter.
[+13] u/nthnreallymatters: these 4 years were our last chance to escape the permanent underclass and make genny wealth before AI takes over
and now that dream is over
[+13] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: khAAARRRg you ready kids? 🏴☠️
[+13] u/Ok_Information_4137: US already targeting bridges and Kharg - SPY down 0.5%, later Mango will tweet fake negoations and SPY will pump 2%
[+13] u/Fancy_Goat685: On the bright side if we go back to the stone age at least all of us will no longer be addicted and glued to our cellphones and actually touch grass for once.
[+13] u/ShittyUsernane1222: one day bulls will come out and claim they have been against 🥭 the whole time
[+13] u/RB_7: The president threatening to glass a large foreign country seems bad idk
[+13] u/Swiftnice: Does he understand that killing an entire civilization is the definition of genocide? lol
[+13] u/GreatRegard: Can someone please do a ceasefire news story?[Furious Iran vows to cut off US oil and gas 'for years,' declaring 'restraint is over'](https://www.the-express.com/news/politics/204289/iran-says-restraint-over-vows)
[+12] u/good-times-: The fact is we have no idea what is going on. Let’s gamble retards.
[+12] u/Money-Coyote3100: STOP THE F\*\*ING WAR!
[+12] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: US DIDN'T INTENTIONALLY TARGET KHARG ISLAND LANDING DOCKS: FOX
US TARGETS INCLUDED BUNKERS, RADAR STATION AMMO STORAGE: FOX
So “the best military in the world” missed?
[+12] u/confused_teabagger: It is incredible to see someone lie themselves into a corner and know that the next thing they do is going to fuck everything up, but they are incapable of admitting it so they still do it. Talking about a friend and also doing a little DD.
[+12] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: oh no they messed up the coordinates and hit epstein island, oh no, i guess there is nothing left to talk about now
[+12] u/Responsible-Rip8793: MY DICK SMALL BUT IT HARD AF RIGHT NOW
[+12] u/Cantthinkofacoolnam: I can’t wait to pay $20 a gallon for gas.
[+12] u/callsonreddit: Donald latest tweet so bad Reddit filters it
[https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116363336033995961](https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/posts/116363336033995961)
[+12] u/Shoganai_Hito: Did he really just claim complete genocide
Fukin lunatic
[+12] u/ervelee: Everywhere the Department of War goes… oil is discovered.
[+12] u/glutathionegod: 🌮, or not, 🥭 is genuinely a madman
[+12] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: what the fuck is that tweet
[+12] u/WingedScapula420: am I reading too much between the lines or did he just threaten to nuke Iran?
[+12] u/MissMatriarch: I'm sorry, I must have stroked out and died.
Why is the market PUMPING on the threat of nuclear annihilation?
[+12] u/saintmitchy: “We’re wiping out a whole civilization and oil just hit a 10 year high”
SPY: “best I can do is -0.50%”
[+12] u/ShittyUsernane1222: 🥭 threatened to murder 92 Million People on broad daylight and you are bullish.
[+12] u/twostroke1: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
The algo’s: 📉📉📉
*everyone loads up on puts*
The algo’s: 📈📈📈
[+12] u/Homeless-Coward-2143: People think he's so full of shit that he can announce he's going to nuke Iran like this and the market still goes up. Fucking Christ
[+12] u/emergencyexit: If you are highly regarded get yourself a disabled badge
[+11] u/Austin_Destroyer: Ruh-roh.
I gotta hand it to the MMs. I stopped loading puts because I got tired of losing money. Sounds like you regards loaded calls because tAcO TuEsDaY.
We're all dogs in God's hot car.
[+11] u/wanggoesinataco: Hey auto mod. Squeeze these nuts
[+11] u/ShittyUsernane1222: Iran is raising an army of 14 million, US is bombing kharg island, Oil prices are rising and you're bullish.
[+11] u/Liquidtears: bruh why isn't everything down much more?
I'm bullish and confused
[+11] u/financiallythriving: If only I never discovered options
[+11] u/ismebbb: I yearn for the excitement of a circuit breaker
[+11] u/MissMatriarch: Somehow the market thinks world annihilation is not a cause for concern.
[+11] u/StopAndThinkPleaseTy: Kharg island sounds like an island I would have gone to in WoW
[+11] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: What the actual fuck, man.
[+11] u/somebodys0mewhere: Sounds quite desperate really. The chick does not want to talk to you buddy, drop it and move on.
[+11] u/AntiOriginalUsername: Probably ending green today. Market will see the “civilization will die tonight” and see that as a signal of the end of the war lmao.
[+11] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Just some casual threats of genocide no big deal
[+11] u/Revolver_Lanky_Kong: Civilization will die TONIGHT, NO MORE DEADLINE EXTENSIONS.... or maybe TOMORROW.... failing that THURSDAY AT THE LATEST.... its up to you IRAN.... THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! DJT
[+10] u/NewlyOld31: Is today the day my 🐻 balls get emptied?!
[+10] u/Sean_VasDeferens: 80% chance that something will come out around 2:00 that will cause the market to go from negative 1% to positive 1% in a matter of minutes. I'm not playing the game today.
[+10] u/claytondpark: This mkt needs a full blown capitulation day where all indices are like -3%+ with no bifurcation and indiscriminate selling. That's when I go all in...
[+10] u/heisenbeirg: Bols about to get nut slapped
[+10] u/vermilli21: Market looked bullish about 4 hours ago…what changed
[+10] u/Far_Addition1210: He wont wait for the deadline, him and Hegseth will start before and claims its Pearl Harbour tactics, the element of surprise.
[+10] u/Dry-Syrup-882: A whole civilization could die tonight. Calls.
[+10] u/This-Marzipan-5557: 🍊 has lost the plot, making threats on truth to end an entire civ even made the spy go down for once.
[+10] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: Also he was referring to american civilisation
[+10] u/Diamondhands4dagainz: this tweet and that green candle confirm that a TACO is 100% on the cards lmao. It’s just so he can say that he saved the Iranian people when the situation was dire.
[+10] u/twostroke1: *47 years of extortion, corruption, and death, will finally end.*
…by killing them all?
[+10] u/Coogiez: Why can’t it just be a normal day ever
[+10] u/WIWIWIWIIIII: Imagine Iran already has the nuclear bomb, that’d be hilarious
[+10] u/DesignerSea494: Now that I’m a Canadian citizen, I can move up north to be with my hot Canadian girlfriend. I still can’t show you guys a picture of her though, they don’t have Reddit in Canada.
[+9] u/Brief_Introduction78: Can't make this shit up anymore, they nuked my port and now Kharg Island too?
[+9] u/X211499Reddit: Believe it or not: calls
[+9] u/trsx5: If he just got a peace prize none of this would have happened. Thats how insane all of this is.
[+9] u/mayorolivia: We will get a tweet saying talks with Iran are going well and the deadline has been extended. Trade accordingly poor boys
[+9] u/Excellent-Koala3873: How are we not down more
[+9] u/Vulthen1: Half genocidal, half 🌮
[+9] u/AntiOriginalUsername: Genghis Khan but a more retarted version.
[+9] u/Revolver_Lanky_Kong: Tbf we did get a regime change. We killed what was essentially their pope and an even more anti-american hardliner took his place (we also blew up his entire family)
[+9] u/Soft_Walrus_3605: >A whole civilization will die tonight
Just another Tuesday in this crazy world ...
[+9] u/SuffiecientSapian: Reports are showing he is now actively attack Kharg Island. We are so very fucked
[+9] u/phagebiscotti: Trump posted saying a whole civilization may be killed tonight and volatility DROPPED since then
[+9] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: markets reacting positively to genocide threat
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: If their "entire civilization dies" then Nuremberg 2.0 is the bare minimum.
[+9] u/Immediate_Type4095: This is not a TACO situation lol
[+9] u/Ahzmer: ahhhaha this is incredible. Nuke threat = markets dump, but 5 mins later they pump because he always taco right? This market is beyond crazy, and i dont even know if I'm the regarded one or not. How long will this go on? There is absolutely no way to predict this market if you are not an insider.
[+9] u/Xx360StalinScopedxX: Civilization ending events are already priced in by algos, calls
[+9] u/cow_grass: Following "your whole civilization will die" with "God bless great people of iran" deserves a mental insanity award.
[+9] u/Fantastic_Pirate3948: Who are the retards buying this dip right now?
[+8] u/fish_: im loaded tf up with puts, we are definitely green all week
[+8] u/ShittyUsernane1222: this is not a bull market, this is a Dongfeng DF-61 Intercontinental ballistic missile market.
[+8] u/cashflow_: If anyone wanted a blackjack update I won 4K last night. On a 7 day win streak. Should probably quit while I’m up
[+8] u/nthnreallymatters: the issue is no one really has an incentive to sell
but they keep auto buying
spy is down -3% this year
all the boomers are asleep or laughing at this dip
-10% is when they start to wake up and debate if they should sell
[+8] u/Treverer: Ok, so they hit the Armageddon button aka Kharg.
98% of Iranian petro-exports run through this island. They’ve got nothing to lose anymore, now we’ll see if all those threats they dished out will blow up in 🥭 face
[+8] u/Infamous-Mixture8278: Once again, ENTIRELY SELF INFLICTED
[+8] u/MissMatriarch: Now I understand! SPY 700 EOD meant 'End of Decade'
[+8] u/MartianSpaceCat: Enjoy the big and beautiful orange dildo, bols.
[+8] u/Actual_Difference617: Thats one resilient mfing market.
[+8] u/TinyAdhesiveness5773: its crazy that when you visit other subreddits and people are calm and bullish
[+8] u/wallstreetdiva37: Who is Epstein again? Surely no one remembers him anymore
[+8] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: It's truly amazing how this fucking retard manages to choose the wrong option every single time
[+8] u/2tapbaptise: Yeh.... He gonna nuke em
JFC welp everyone starts panic buying and selling since money won't matter in a nuclear apocalypse and what truly matter is who give the best head
[+8] u/MissMatriarch: Is mango really going Shady Sands on the Wet Sands?
[+8] u/TJMBeav: There will never be another Donald J Trump. Unique in all of history. And I wish it was over
[+8] u/financiallythriving: Make sure you work a full 8 hour today at your corporate job (not including lunch). Better not catch you posting on here as well
[+8] u/Visible_Sir7057: Can y'all boomers and gen x please stop causing wars and fucking the global economy up bro , AI has already fucked my chances of a job
[+8] u/Iamhappilyconfused: 🥭 would be horrible at telltale games, fucker is always choosing the worst option
[+8] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: the last truth social from POTUS was an actual schizo post.
[+8] u/BigBasedGrifter69: He's literally telling us to buy calls
[+8] u/enc-nyc: hola retardos, good morning Iran!
[+8] u/the_mind_goblin1: His rhetoric is so completely insane that he has to be bluffing. Calls
[+8] u/jg0nzalez22: How is market not dropping. Who the fuck is buying!?!? Did Gamestop Apes resurrect?
[+8] u/Ok_Information_4137: 🥭: Talks with Iran are going well(they are not) - SPY +3%
🥭: Whole civilization will die - SPY -0.5%
[+8] u/GoomyIsGodTier: TACO Tuesday or War Crimes Wednesday?
What will we have?
[+8] u/callsonreddit: So Donald said world ending nd we pump?
Checks out
[+8] u/ThouOne: Operation: Send Earth back to the 3rd Century
[+8] u/UnitedCup1814: I think Israel has rotted the 🥭 brain .
[+8] u/PhotoSpheres: Saying that ‘a whole civilization will die tonight’ before backtracking and extending the deadline again is so tuff 😤
[+7] u/Infamous-Mixture8278: For a second there I thought he might taco. Now I’m not so sure. It’s like when you’re trying to predict what a scared prey animal is gonna do. Very tough
[+7] u/xTeeD: * hits bridges this AM
* hits kharg island AM
Says “Iran now knows how serious I am now about my threat and are willing to open a communication line. Then 🌮. Markets up 3% by lunch
[+7] u/Fit_Neighborhood9251: It is a good thing fighting began now, at least we will not be bullshited until 8PM.
[+7] u/chuastan: Mango knows - we can still skin seals in Greenland for oil. Calm down
[+7] u/Country_Gravy420: 6400 today.
6250 tomorrow
[+7] u/Infamous-Mixture8278: If there’s one thing I know, it’s that crude being 115 a barrel is bullish LMAO
[+7] u/Relative_Acadia2125: bloody red day bc hormuz, kharg Island and now Panama canal you can thank me later
[+7] u/DefiantDelta: “he’s gonna TACO!!!” baby the restaurant got shut down by the health department and the building got foreclosed 😭
[+7] u/Liquidtears: What times taco today?
[+7] u/R3dFiveStandingBye: I didn’t know Battlefield 3 was a documentary
[+7] u/kemar7856: Iran telling their youth to form human shields around power plants
[+7] u/whitehypeman: The taco tastes better on Tuesdays
[+7] u/Urzuck: Bols anoos getting bombed
[+7] u/Street-Badger: Why would a FIFA laureate do this?
[+7] u/VariousScenes: We should be giving everyone a 1000$ sign up bonus when activating your options trading account just like the casino's do
[+7] u/DaFlyingGriffin: By 8pm deadline, he meant 8am.
[+7] u/Diligent_Fondant6761: America and Israel are playing good cop: bad cop with Iran!
[+7] u/TrickyDickCheney: Hopefully today is not a day that will live in infamy
[+7] u/StonksInvesteur: This is retarded to trade lmfao
[+7] u/financiallythriving: Some people on here wouldn’t take a raise to avoid paying more taxes
[+7] u/tika_dengu: Ports will be sacrificed
[+7] u/Important_Shirt_1567: The stock market is getting a little Yippy
[+7] u/Locke_____Lamora: OKLO's chart is something else lol. Just slow bled for 6 months straight
[+7] u/Intelligent-Claim193: How is this not bearish
[+7] u/AirwickS: 🥱 He’s never been truthful in his posts. And he won’t start today.
[+7] u/tika_dengu: Markets will pump anytime now
[+7] u/Locke_____Lamora: Can we 25th this retard already holy shit
[+7] u/_Fibbles_: Took the loss and sold premarket. You can thank me when it pumps on open.
[+7] u/Sidney_Godsby: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
-President of USA
“Calls it is!”
-Delulubol
[+7] u/glutathionegod: Someone take the fucking phone from Grandpa
[+7] u/Le_Flight_Chief: How the fuck are we going back up.
[+7] u/Motley843: Whos Pumping this DUMP?
[+7] u/sloanemonroe: Imagine, JUST IMAGINE if Biden said that.
[+7] u/mandoslambo: Is he threatening genocide?
I thought he wanted to save the Iranian people
[+7] u/RareGuarantee3532: Imagine tomorrow's candle if he does not taco.
The market is skyhigh pricing an epic taco despite the highest oil price and long term market disruption.
If he does not, we are going to a -30% end of the week.
[+7] u/ImTheLizardKing2: Trump can’t TACO this time after he doubled and tripled down. He either makes a deal or has to slaughter Iran, otherwise he appears too weak. I don’t think the markets will like it but I have no idea.
[+7] u/RB_7: Mango will drop a nuke on Iran and the market will still be betting taco
[+7] u/saintmitchy: We bombed Kharg. Huge escalation
[+6] u/BigShmokeBuffer: Bols takin’ it right in the bussy today
Sharing red dildo with bers… ass-to-ass
BECAUSE THETA IS GOD!!! 😎
[+6] u/talkyape: Buckle up y'all 🤣🏴☠️
[+6] u/Czyzzle: BREAKING: Sound of explosions on Kharg Island
[+6] u/LazyImprovement9160: Spy sub 600 is back on the menu bools.
[+6] u/d33p7r0ubl3: Happy Power Plant Day everyone
[+6] u/Czyzzle: Kharg is being attacked
[+6] u/VariousScenes: Props for the element of surprise, who would've thought 🥭 would escalate on a Tuesday, 2 hours BEFORE market open
[+6] u/eyerollingsex: Interviewed at a marketing agency making 50k a month running Facebook ads and they don’t know what a Facebook custom audience is
[+6] u/BigShmokeBuffer: SPY green today
Just on vibes 😌
[+6] u/Significant_Speed854: Shit could not be more flat
[+6] u/BigShmokeBuffer: My brothers, cast aside your moral failings and shackles of sin.
And have ye faith 🙏
For all is forgiven when basking in the light of NVDA 200!
[+6] u/Different-Volume-129: I SURVIVED THE 2026 RECESSION
[+6] u/Ninja_Cooter: I year ago today biggest 🐻 trap in history
[+6] u/SalemKinkTrials: Don’t look at your port today man just go outside
[+6] u/Austin_Destroyer: USO up $2 rapidly, why isn't SPY up 2%?
Come on MMs, you made me believe.
[+6] u/LeBhikariLe: yahoo finance is usually: Dimon says this, JP Morgan says that, Ackerman says this or that. It literally revolves around these 3 even though Dimon and JP are the same
[+6] u/NewAccount428412: I love the smell of napalm in the morning
[+6] u/Waveytony: Day 2 of no nicotine, resisting the urge to shotgun a white Monster to replicate the effects
[+6] u/Axonum: WHAT THE FUCK DID HE SAY
[+6] u/Zforce17: The stable genius is awake
[+6] u/kawkface: Believe it or not, calls at open
[+6] u/suddenly-scrooge: >A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again
uhh
[+6] u/Actual_Difference617: I think the $200 billion has been paid to MM to eat losses and keep buying lol. The price action everyday is so unnatural.
[+6] u/kryptonyk: How big will the Shrek dick be when Donnie doesn’t do shit? +3%? +5%?
[+6] u/absolutxtr: This market is so regarded. Just refuses to respond to bad news or oil. Worst it'll do is give up the gains it made yesterday. Maybe.
[+6] u/TheWizardOfFries: This Trump guy is a real jerk
[+6] u/Eddyrancid: Kharg island attacks are bullish- do just enough to justify extending the deadline again
[+6] u/FearlessStatement144: this has calls at close all over it..
[+6] u/glenn_rodgers: Yeah I'm thinking oil is rising more than DJT's blood pressure
[+6] u/PopularCut4124: Nobel peace prize !!!
[+6] u/mrmagootoyou2: Open the market you crazy bastards
[+6] u/CUbuffGuy: I fucking hate that we are higher than before his tweet lol, everyone expecting a taco is a dangerous game
[+6] u/pacific_b: a whole civilization of bers will die when the concepts of a deal of a proposed plan to have initial talks comes out tonight and pumps the market
[+6] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: I am very certain that is a war crime mr president
[+6] u/Muted-South4737: Season 47 is wild. Got my popcorn. No idea what's going to happen next.
[+6] u/Material-Entrance425: he better taco because I'm going to need decades to use up this loss carry forward
[+6] u/narwalfarts: This could really get ugly today. Machines have been stabilizing the market the last few days, but that looks like it might flip today. Major negative headlines, including 🥭 deranged shit, even for his standards, has markets already going heavy red.
But according to bar chart, we're already in negative gamma, so algos would flip and accelerate a crash. No huge put walls below where we're at. If this continues, we could legit crash today.
https://www.barchart.com/stocks/quotes/$SPX/gamma-exposure
[+6] u/VariousScenes: And the market jumps up a bit following that tweet? Are we for real?
[+6] u/Jacobpapi: Is this nukes or normal missiles?
[+6] u/TheMatinow: 🥭 will 100% want a peace prize for preventing nuking Iran
[+6] u/xXFoxyGrandpaXx: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
📈
[+6] u/vaksninus: i mean honestly just wtf, it looks like straight bluffing by why does he have to be such a loony
[+6] u/Maximum_Light409: Not only that, now our Nobel peace prize winner is also posting stuff about 1929.
[+6] u/Reply_Stunning: tonight is like end of 1999, all radios playing jennifer lopez - waiting for tonight
[+6] u/Bulky_Cartoonist_110: So POTUS says he will probably wipe out a civilization and my puts aren’t going to print?
[+6] u/Sir_Grindalot: That's the textbook "Delayed Taco" strategy; everyone was expecting a taco moment today followed by a SPY pump. Instead, those with a deep understanding of the market knew the "Delayed Taco" was happening; we were bound for a red day, with the actual Taco happening later this week. You people who got calls yesterday made a rookie mistake to be quite honestly frankly with you.
[+6] u/Detail-Vegetable: So when he said he had all the cards, he meant he has the genocide card. I forgot about that one.
[+6] u/ruskyandrei: Trump: "A whole civilisation will die tonight"
Bulls: "This is my que to buy the dip! Witnesss meeee!!"
[+6] u/PeeOnDusk: Dumbest Taco of all time in 2 hours
[+6] u/Irishbros1991: Bombing oil facilities on Iranian Island Iran will respond in kind setting the region back to the Stone age.... But don't worry the negotiations are going well!
[+5] u/Longstreet66: Something's coming....
[+5] u/TJMBeav: Most of y'all think the invasion will be at Pas-de-Calais and it shows
[+5] u/bzl33: > BREAKING: Iran's Revolutionary Guards announces all restraint in targeting will be ending and it will strike infrastructure in a way that could deprive US and regional countries of oil and gas resources for years.
Mango wants this to seize the nukes
[+5] u/PhysInstrumentalist: We have tested resistance over 10+ times now, fuck off Bols
[+5] u/justanaveragejoe520: Better go fill up your car and friends. Gas going to $5 a gallon by the weekend at this rate
[+5] u/Shoganai_Hito: Wait… I thought Operation Midnight Hammer already crippled Iran’s nuclear capabilities. Why make them agree to something that’s impossible for them
[+5] u/Jealous_Archer_4522: But i don't wanna get fukt in my anoos again. No for real I don't like it. Okay maybe a little but still.....
[+5] u/slamtt: bers cooked
if we lose ES 6610 we might see 6609
[+5] u/confused_teabagger: Hey bros, just woke up from a drunken coma, what is the crooked hormuz doing, we looking at price rockets today?
[+5] u/Worth-Walk6265: Oil is going to $200 my sweet darlings
[+5] u/Jarlaxle_rigged_it: \*queue 3 day old news item about talks going well
[+5] u/sloanemonroe: This is the 6th week of the strait being closed. Big problems were supposed to happen after just three weeks. So where does this leave things now that it’s 6
[+5] u/touuuuhhhny: When will this non-stop fever dream end. 🌮 please
[+5] u/DressPrestigious7088: What happened between 6 and 7am? Why did we dump so hard?
[+5] u/Axonum: We didn't intentionally target it guys... IT WAS AN ACCIDENT
[+5] u/Ahamadrayasbaboon: Peace be with y’all.
[+5] u/MeeseShoop: Now those goobers can’t dock when they invade kharg lmfao
[+5] u/Retaining-Wall: Feeling fute, might dump later.
[+5] u/X211499Reddit: 🥭 starting wars just so he can say he ended more wars
[+5] u/BigShmokeBuffer: Gonna get the Alysa Liu hairstyle 💇♀️
… that’ll cut my wife’s weird obsession with her right up 🙂↕️
[+5] u/NewlyOld31: Holding 20 shorts at 6575. Please Allah give us a minus 150 day
[+5] u/AirwickS: 💥Reuters: US strikes military targets on Iran's Kharg Island, US official says
https://www.reuters.com/world/middle-east/us-strikes-military-targets-irans-kharg-island-us-official-says-2026-04-07/
Article doesn’t contain much more information.
[+5] u/marcus55: Please god let me off this hellish ride
[+5] u/soccer29801830: They should have a bomb lowering down like the New Years ball for the 8pm countdown
[+5] u/Irishbros1991: Experts oil will need to hit $120 for recession to be on the table but we don't see that happening and the war being short term.... You call yourself experts you must be fucking idiots who get paid to do nothing?
[+5] u/patricktu1258: I am about to throw up
[+5] u/JordiX93: What y’all are throwing on the grill for Power plant day and Bridge day?
[+5] u/aftherith: Oil gunning for the overnight high
[+5] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Kharg being bombed means no more oil
[+5] u/Star_Lord924: Need mango to fucking tweet something to pump this back up even just briefly so I can unload my calls ans then this can drop again. I hate the fucking market
[+5] u/TheMatinow: WHO KNOWS? Fuck he is such a diva
[+5] u/BigShmokeBuffer: Bro, 🫵 the real throat goat
Don’t let anybody put you down because “you don’t have enough experience”
This week in the market is really gonna show the doubters what you’ve got 😎
[+5] u/DefiantDelta: joe kernen drooling over the concept of a civilization dying rn
[+5] u/MissMatriarch: Man's throwing around nuke threats like it's a commercial for the next Real Hollywood Housewives episode.
[+5] u/DifficultGarlic6: People really think he's not going to TACO. Just buy 1 DTE calls for tomorrow and print money, easy.
[+5] u/Ready-Tennis8577: Soooo yall know he won’t taco tonight right? Everyone will be like woah man what happened
Anyways
Boobs
[+5] u/cbusoh66: Should not hurt his chances at a Nobel Prize too much if he just bombs few power plants and bridges...After all, he already stopped 8 wars!!!
[+5] u/Friendofabook: Hey guys remember killer wasps?
Heh, I miss those days.
[+5] u/touuuuhhhny: With that tweet he just set the impending and inevitable TACO further up for even larger green candles.
[+5] u/ILove2LoseMoney: I’ve been buying puts and lost money in every single one of them. Today, Im considering calls and the market will dump -5%
[+5] u/Dry-Syrup-882: “We were very close to total annihilation. It would’ve been like, things you’ve never seen before. More bombs than you’ve ever seen. Complete obliteration. A country wiped off the map. Just wiped off the map. Bing. Bing. Whooosh. Gone.
But I saved it. Someone had to do it. We made a deal. And it’s a great deal, one of the best that’s ever been made quite frankly.”
[+5] u/Vulthen1: To me this smells like a bluff, the 2nd half of the truth just shows he is still trying to find a way to get out of this and 🌮
[+5] u/boraboca: I sit behind Baron at our 8 am NYU class. I see him right now loading up on 0 dte calls on his robinhood account
[+5] u/Advanced_Worry_5525: this might be the greatest TACO of all time!
[+5] u/justanaveragejoe520: Guess taking out a whole civilization is bullish 😬
[+5] u/bm_mane8: Guys we need to take this seriously. Tonight might be bad.
[+5] u/Upstairs_System_6257: Market seemed to rly like that post
[+5] u/Medical-Tune676: Bulls really are the worst. They never shut the fuck up when they win. Us bears just say thank you.
[+5] u/solidsneeze: shaping up to be the biggest taco we've ever seen. This guy is so dramatic
[+5] u/Responsible-Rip8793: 🥭 ***AINT GONNA DO SHIIII. IF HE WAS GOING TO DO IT HE WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY. THIS IS MR “GRAB EM BY THE PUSSY” W/O CONSENT. HE IS GONNA*** 🌮
[+5] u/holymolyratio: what even happens if a nuke drops. im sure this fucked up market would be green somehow the next day
[+5] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: Is this donald trump's way to get us to spy700
[+5] u/OrangeForeva: Algos relentlessly buying no matter the news.
[+5] u/Anal_holocost: I'm starting to believe that if one day aliens come and threaten to eliminate mankind, the market will go up regardless
[+5] u/PayneTrain181999: The market is simply trying to avoid another crash at all costs.
Nothing but a serious escalation like boots on the ground will cause it to crash. Manifestations and dreams are rampant and the algorithms are reacting like a self-affirming AI girlfriend
[+5] u/NotRobotNFL: The bigger the threat, the more likely it’s bs
[+5] u/karlelzz011: How did he manage to put "end of civilization" and appreciate "Great People of Iran"
They are same? As far as i know.
[+5] u/mrmagootoyou2: The trick to this whole thing is to literally just own USO shares and avoid the premiums and theta...
Been pretty good the past month lol
[+5] u/DuaLipa247: The day he does not taco 🫵 bought calls classic
[+5] u/holymolyratio: the us treasury at it again shorting oil 🤡
[+5] u/DateUser66: yep, and its fucking insaaane
[+5] u/This-Marzipan-5557: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+5] u/illinformed-will: You mean like just before an airborne division attack ?
[+5] u/confused_teabagger: > psyops team would have had amercians running round looking for terrorists in haystacks and rounding up brown people by now
quick question, have you ever seen a picture of an Iranian or met one irl?
[+5] u/re_yun_NS: Hegseth literally said they would attack today in the press conference yesterday, the market pretended not to hear it
[+49] u/Willing-Angle-2203: It's insane how he is just allowed to say things like "a whole civilization will die tonight."
There is no repercussions on this world. We live and die to be exploited and pay taxes to pedophiles who commit war crimes and burn everything to the ground...
happy tuesday
[+34] u/Character_Pirate_152: "Whole civilization will die tonight"
What the fuck is happening? USA has gone mad. This is not the country i grew up in where the worst a president did was receive blowjob at work.
[+33] u/ContributionMore5502: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
Two weeks ago
“It’s a shame they won’t give me the Nobel peace prize, everyone says I deserve it for ending 17 wars”
[+31] u/drytexterfinalboss: Mango is openly threatening nuclear Holocaust and market is like best I can do is -0.35%
[+31] u/getshmoney69420: Sitting US President, "Imma wipe out a civilization" SPY: -.25%
[+31] u/MasterElite1: >TRUMP: A WHOLE CIVILIZATION WILL DIE TONIGHT, NEVER TO BE BROUGHT BACK AGAIN
He means the US dollar
[+24] u/Full_Cash6140: So we're just going to casually mention literal genocide on social media now. Cool, cool!
The name of the social media site would make Orwell roll over in his grave.
Americans: "This is fine."
[+24] u/br0botic: Obama: wears a tan suit one time and everyone loses their minds
Trump: “A WHOLE CIVILIZATION WILL DIE TONIGHT”
[+23] u/borrokalaria: BREAKING:
Iran cancels all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States and announces the suspension of any and all message exchanges, following Trump’s latest threat – Reuters
Calls on potassium iodide
[+22] u/Invincilble: "a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don't want that to happen, but it probably will" SPY +3%
[+22] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: $400b to pay off generations of student loan debt 🚫
$500b Invested in AI that thinks I should walk to a car wash ✅
[+22] u/Fresh_Internal_6085: My (admittedly layman) take on it is this:
He essentially has every intention of accepting Iran’s proposal, perhaps with a ‘few’ amendments.
He’s ramping up the rhetoric to the point of threatening the destruction of their entire civilisation, so he can claim that they folded under his biggly pressure.
The absolute most important factor to him is his image, nothing else matters.
And if he can portray himself as the ‘tough guy’ he will, even though he knows full well they have him by the balls and he’s being forced into accepting a second rate ‘deal’.
If this happens, the bullshit and lies flying out of the WH will reach unprecedented highs.
[+22] u/bobbyd121: *MAYBE SOMETHING REVOLUTIONARILY WONDERFUL CAN HAPPEN, WHO KNOWS? WE WILL FIND OUT TONIGHT*
🥭 treating this like it's the season finale of the apprentice
[+22] u/Old-Collection-224: "A whole civilization might die tonight, i don't want that, but it's probably going to happen" - Mang0
[+21] u/ALittleWorseEveryday: 🥭:guys I’m gonna do it this time I’m serious stop laughing at me
[+20] u/NazgulSandwich: ONLY 11 HOURS UNTIL THERE IS 72 MORE HOURS….
….. !!!! …… final warning………
[+20] u/TheNicestRedditor: I liked it better when 🥭 worked at McDonald’s
[+20] u/a321alec: Regardless if what might happen, rhetoric threatening to destroy another civilization is way over the line and it's really irritating that everyone here is joking about it.
[+19] u/Rolling_in_the_Dip: !banbet SPY -50% 24h
[+18] u/Ok-Thought-9960: Breaking: hegseth promotes captain Morgan as the new Army General
[+18] u/crossdefaults: The US will announce a "deal." The people who signed the "deal" for Iran will remain secret (they don't even go here). The "deal" will be the best deal ever. The civilization will continue. Stonks will rise then chop. The US and Israel will continue to kill Iranians from the air. Possibly some ground fighting, limited over there next few weeks.
[+18] u/hiphopanonomos: Remember when you bought stocks based on earnings and potential future profit
[+18] u/---Right--Tackle---: #a whole civilization of bagholders will rise tonight
[+17] u/TreGet234: Someone impeach this guy holy hell.
[+17] u/PompeiiSketches: Imagine the reputational damage that the FIFA Peace committee would take if he doesn’t TACO.
[+17] u/zuziannka: https://preview.redd.it/lg9ws1adnrtg1.jpeg?width=1260&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0afd64091756404fbc480797ecd7a11a2c1ffa81
So should I attend my weekly meeting which is in 2 mins or no? The whole civilization is gonna be dead tonight
[+17] u/teh_herper: #Bers literally cried and prayed for times like these, the end of civilization
[+16] u/soa333: A whole civilization of bools will die tonight
[+16] u/External_Counter378: Bloomberg claiming tech stocks are a safe haven. Top is in.
[+16] u/MasterElite1: >BREAKING: Iranian media says talks and indirect negotiations with the US have been halted following Trump's threat
😮
[+16] u/winston511: Bro the Easter tweet made me sick to my stomach to read but somehow this one is even worse
[+16] u/angusjones1: How is this real? Should be down -1.5%
[+16] u/brock2063: BREAKING: AXIOS HAS OBTAINED IRAN'S FINAL CEASEFIRE OFFER SENT TO US:
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⢉⢉⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠠⡰⣕⣗⣷⣧⣀⣅⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⣠⣳⣟⣿⣿⣷⣿⡿⣜⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⣳⢷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣝⠖⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⢢⡹⣿⢷⣯⢿⢷⡫⣗⠍⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⢄⠤⣁⠋⠿⣗⣟⡯⡏⢎⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠄⢔⢕⣯⣿⣿⡲⡤⡄⡤⠄⡀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠇⠠⡳⣯⣿⣿⣾⢵⣫⢎⢎⠆⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢨⣫⣿⣿⡿⣿⣻⢎⡗⡕⡅⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢜⢾⣾⣿⣿⣟⣗⢯⡪⡳⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⢽⣿⣷⣿⣻⡮⡧⡳⡱⡁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢨⣻⣽⣿⣟⣿⣞⣗⡽⡸⡐⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢀⢗⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣞⡵⡣⣊⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⡣⣗⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡯⡺⣼⠎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⠐⡵⣻⣟⣯⣿⣷⣟⣝⢞⡿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢘⡺⣽⢿⣻⣿⣗⡷⣹⢩⢃⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠪⣯⣟⣿⢯⣿⣻⣜⢎⢆⠜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⢣⣻⣽⣿⣿⣟⣾⡮⡺⡸⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠄⢕⡳⣽⡾⣿⢽⣯⡿⣮⢚⣅⠹⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠒⠝⣞⢿⡿⣿⣽⢿⡽⣧⣳⡅⠌⠻⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⡐⠱⡱⣻⡻⣝⣮⣟⣿⣻⣟⣻⡺⣊
[+16] u/Knarre30: Yeah nothing to see here. 🌮 threatens to genocide a whole civilisation. Cool. Even it shows that it was a lie it should be concerning that he says such a stuff.
[+16] u/ValueOfADollar: bro I just saw the ‘death of a civilisation tweet’ oh my fucking god
[+16] u/vSlickRick: I dont care what happens a president saying "a whole civilization will die tonight" is crazy and makes me not care about my losses
[+15] u/hunnna: Lmao millions of Americans will vote for whoever this guy tells them to
[+15] u/Shacreme: We just had to kill that gorilla 10 years ago.
[+15] u/OrdinaryMix4013: Bro looks fuken rattled lmaooooo stfu bro ur in the epastein files lmammmo
[+15] u/OsamaBagHolding: If Iran really wanted peace, why would they build their country next to dozens of our military bases?!?!
Thank you for your attention to this matter.
[+15] u/Canadianinvestor1997: “Civilization will end “ wsb: I just want a green port man
[+15] u/Ok_Persimmon9849: Threatening to wipe out a civilization seems like something you do when you're winning. We are winning so much guys!
[+14] u/Soffatjockis: So like, how many w4r crimes will be committed tonight?
Seems like wsb is blocking certain words.
[+14] u/Local_Falcon_2864: "ALL DIPLOMATIC CHANNELS AND INDIRECT TALKS HAVE BEEN FROZEN FOLLOWING TRUMP’S RECENT THREATS."
[+14] u/jmc774: This reminds me of when my crazy ex would say increasingly out of pocket shit when she could feel me getting ready to break up with her
[+14] u/Dismal_Conflict7922: Really need a doomsday event so I can make 2k on my one spy put
[+14] u/Kattilaeikka: War crimes? Calls.
Genocide? Calls.
Nuclear holocaust? Calls.
In all seriousness now would be a good time for some adults to step in and take the keys away from grandpa.
[+14] u/humunculus43: Is threatening to end civilisation bullish?
[+14] u/emperor_dinglenads: Breaking news : America to convert to the metric system in an effort to make gas look cheaper.
[+14] u/Heavenisaplace176: If the market is green today I must quit trading as I have no idea what I’m doing
[+14] u/doernotspeaker: Motherfucker posts threatening genocide, and follows it up with a plug of his shitty website. Feels like an episode of Black Mirror.
[+14] u/JellyfishFestival: I watched the USA go to war in Afghanistan for 20 years, boots on the ground, and not destroy a much weaker civilization. Or even accomplish a clear objective. The current guy was in charge for 4 of them.
I'm very skeptical that the bite matches the bark, unless the unthinkable were to be done.
[+13] u/NaturalFortune8397: a civilization will end today
but he didn’t say which
please be us. please be us
[+13] u/nullzeroerror: JD is such a pathetic little cuck. Stupid fucking crackbaby
[+13] u/unpaid-astroturfer: > "A whole civilization will die tonight"
Damn, R.I.P. Sweden
[+13] u/sharkenleo: Not a single person believes this man. Clown show. What a timeline we live in.
[+13] u/kwarknagel: Oh I get it, the J stands for Jihad
[+13] u/br0botic: One of the most insane things he has ever said/posted. Somehow he continues to outdo himself
[+13] u/luxford2: Does he think he’s the fucking Joker or something?
[+13] u/Amazing-Topic2827: That tweet actually does sound like this some kind of sick joke. If he backs out, his fanbois here will yank the peeper and go back to worship mode. Truly sad and discusting. But I’ll take that over life loss.
[+13] u/---Right--Tackle---: #imagine trading options in this retarded market lmao
[+13] u/softboiledjadepotato: "A whole civilization will die tonight"...
Market - "ummmm, bullish"
[+13] u/RansomeRandom: I woke up early for this shit?
[+13] u/severed02: The astronauts wisely decided against returning to earth and have made a U turn.
[+13] u/nullzeroerror: Can’t wait for all the “positive talks” “close to deal” fake stories today.
[+13] u/ChickenYip: Dont let all this distract you from the files!
[+12] u/joycaptain: My portfolio will die tonight. Praise Allah
[+12] u/Remarkable_Owl: He’s Schrödinger’s Retard: 100% guaranteed to do it but also 100% guaranteed to TACO
[+12] u/Mr_Madrass: This is the craziest a president has haver said
[+12] u/Miraculum-Capital: "ALL DIPLOMATIC CHANNELS AND INDIRECT TALKS HAVE BEEN FROZEN FOLLOWING TRUMP’S RECENT THREATS."
[+12] u/MuchAd3474: man if it pumps today again i swear
[+12] u/Liability049-6319: The civilization Trump is referring to is bols, btw.
[+12] u/Fearless-Hat-3272: So, free the Iranians, but if not, kill them all...really sets a tone on logic...
[+12] u/Ok_Upstairs3431: Man he is really good with language...
did not have that on my bingo card:
*"A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will."*
[+12] u/CasherburyTales: I’m starting to think bro isn’t a master negotiator
[+12] u/I_work_too_much: Note he didn't necessarily specify ***which*** civilization...
[+12] u/CasherburyTales: Either my calls work out or I don’t gotta worry about it
[+12] u/tandoori_taco_cat: "Vance said the United States has largely accomplished its military objectives in Iran."
So, TACO
[+12] u/alldawgsgotoheaven2: 25th amendment before we are all in the stone age.
[+12] u/ProudPeak3570: threatening total destruction during negotiations.
ART OF THE DEAL!
[+12] u/HandsOnTheBible: “Vance says US hit Iran’s Kharg Island, no change in military strategy“
Via Al jizz
[+12] u/CreamyBehemoth: I just want Rachel rays sexy ass to appear on TV and bake a pastry and tell me everything is going to be okay
[+12] u/Oatmeal_Raisin_: 🥭 hasnt had issues hurting children thus far; i dont think thatll change any of his decisions
[+11] u/Haboubiii: —❗️🇺🇸/🇮🇷 BREAKING: Iran cancels all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States and announces the suspension of any and all message exchanges – IRIB
[+11] u/emperor_dinglenads: Fellow investors, it has come to my attention that even after following the investment advice on this financial website, I seem to have lost quite a bit of money.
[+11] u/Ok-Thought-9960: Yeah its time for the 25th get this fuck out.
[+11] u/Ok-Grapefruit-572: Imagine if I posted on my social media about how many people I’m going to un-alive tonight. A whole civilization? String this fucker up. Now that’s a red day we could all use.
[+11] u/looool_k_libtard: Think of how bad things would be if Elon hadn’t created doge. Elon is the best 🥰 we love you Elon!
[+11] u/ALittleWorseEveryday: Time to go to the Winchester, have a pint, and wait for this whole thing to blow over.
[+11] u/Strong_Coffee_9999: He’s not gonna nuke them, is he?
[+11] u/Fun_Restaurant_1834: What an insane world.
[+11] u/drpa1n: Puts for the sole reason 🥭is a gigantic retard
[+11] u/RefrigeratorAgile366: Before any civilizations collapse, I'll bet the strait of Hormuz finally gets mined and the Houthis close the Bab al-Mandab. Excitement is in the air
[+11] u/SirBuysHighALot: Na faith in humanity if that last tweet is bullish for stock market.
[+11] u/PlentyArmy2411: Finally did my taxes and I owe 19k (the money is gone)
[+11] u/Sensitive_Pilot3689: #It’s literally TACO TUESDAY TODAY 🌮🌮🌮
[+11] u/Upset-Motor-2602: Bols and Bers will take turns getting abused today, and they will enjoy it - I guarantee it!
[+11] u/NOT_A_OFFICER: Exactly how many times can one be sent to the stone age, and obliterated?
[+11] u/sergechewbacca: Imagine the leader of any other country acting like this publicly.
[+11] u/ToroLoco_TL: Tehran Times reports that Iran has closed all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States. Any and all message exchanges have also been suspended.
It's joever
[+11] u/PM_me_a_nip: Don't even try to pretend like you nerds know what’s about to happen
And don’t even pretend like the fact that we aren’t headed for a circuit breaker today means the market is anything but fake
[+11] u/AbiesNo9741: ban bet it then pussy
[+10] u/whyshw: We’re just gonna burn theta because nothing will happen during market hours
[+10] u/All_FIREdUp: $4.40 gas in PA
Don’t forget to say thank you!
[+10] u/Fresh_Internal_6085: May as well repeal the 25th and article I.
If they aren’t going to be used now, they never will be.
[+10] u/maldinisnesta: Born too early to fight in the Middle East, born too late to fight in the Middle East, born just in time to fight in the Middle East.
[+10] u/Erevoss: Look, I know what we’re thinking, big red day, then something regarded is said mid day, and we rip green. But, since that’s what we’re thinking, it’s not gonna happen
[+10] u/WrexyWrex: JPMorgan research note: "The Supreme Leader no longer appears to sit at the apex of the system, while the IRGC has become more empowered... Any effort to force regime change would likely produce state failure rather than a stable transition... There are no signs of capitulation."
[+10] u/KingZorra: I think we are all missing the point of this war. The news has focused exclusively on the conflict, NOT the Epstein files. This is the whole point of it all. All 🥭wants is for people to forget about Epstein. As long as the war keeps people from talking about the Epstein files, the war will keep going. Not investment advise.
[+10] u/Odd-Spray5046: What part of hitting kharg island screams taco?
[+10] u/Zipsterino: He didn’t praise Allah his time. I think he’s for real…
[+10] u/Cheeseheroplopcake: I wonder how hard Barron was giggling as see hit the buy button for his puts yesterday?
[+10] u/NazgulSandwich: Crystal ball:
big T declares victory tonight, announces a new government that no one, especially anyone in iran, is aware of or even has any power whatsoever.
He also declares new strikes at the same time, and also says that the strait is open, and that the strait should be opened. Iran doesnt change its stance because it hasnt yet a single time.
Markets rally slightly because we have too many puts in the system, and then we resume slow bleed for the next few months.
[+10] u/Noddite: This dumbass out here like he is hosting a game show.
It is super obvious he wants to taco, but painted himself into a corner. Unfortunately Obergruppenführer Kegsbreath and many others are very excited to go through with this.
[+10] u/br0botic: Insane man with nuclear codes threatens an entire civilization.
ES Futures: best I can do is -0.4%
[+10] u/StraitOfHummus: PLEASE SIR, PLEASE KEEP BOMBING. MAYBE EVEN USE NUKES SIR!
-The Iranians according to Mango.
[+10] u/JaraxxusPS4: This shit was supposed to last just a few days by the way. Completely preventable
[+10] u/doernotspeaker: French revolution this motherfucker.
[+10] u/EncryptedMyst: > A whole civilization will die tonight
me when I research nuclear fission in civ 6
[+10] u/radljostxx: He just acts like an abusive man who realises she’s finally done
[+10] u/Next_Palpitation8401: Just sold my full positions in AMZN and GOOG, about 90k USD. So probs moon today?
[+10] u/cryptopolymath: The only thing blowing up today is 🥭’s Depends diapers.
[+10] u/AfraidAnalyst: Pretty sure this poker hand he is playing isn’t a royal flush but a 7-2 off suit and he thinks Iran has a worse hand.
Plus he bankrupted a casino
[+10] u/Ready_Scratch_1902: Ngl iran is probably thinkin damn dis fool is crazy though
[+10] u/MadHat0815: Holy shit man they are doing everything they can to prevent the market from collapsing, it's honestly incredible...
Unfortunately for them they can´t just manifest 20% of the global oil supply out of thin air. The supply shock will hit whether they like it or not.
[+10] u/Quick1711: Dude, remove his ass already. We don’t need nukes dropping anywhere
[+10] u/ilikemgs: No one is considering that we are making so many terrorists as a result of this?
[+9] u/DingleJingle_: The Fed is still predicting inflation under 3 percent for the year ? We are so fucked.
[+9] u/Bichael-Murry: # WEN 🥭 GOES FULL DEATH STAR ON IRAN???
# CONCERNED FRENS
[+9] u/Chlo-Motion: If our whole civilization will die tonight, I just want you all to know that it has been an honor losing money with you
(Also fuck you theta gang who's been robbing me of all my money)
[+9] u/optionsmaster42069: That sounds a lot like a taco. “Now that we have complete and total regime change.” Bro nothing has fucking changed lmao
[+9] u/jmc774: 🥭 later today: "I meant in a metaphorical sense, they will die metaphorically"
[+9] u/Daydreamer1945: Market dips I take my pants off, market rips I take my shirt off
[+9] u/BullfrogLevel2087: Its happened - the US hit Irans oil island - put ya sun glasses on boys ready for the big flash
[+9] u/NaturalFortune8397: this is the type of day you max out your credit cards for puts
that’s how free the money will be
[+9] u/HHDemos: can i please just have a $1,000 win before we all die
[+9] u/yeahyoubored: Gas will be 10$ and you will like it because we reallly stuck it to the ayatollah
🥭… probably
[+9] u/Educational-Fan6035: Dont short the market. The makers will eat your money then they will dump it. So many hedges been there already. Careful !!
[+9] u/Antiwhippy: The premarket is swinging more than the married couples at a Republican convention.
[+9] u/tombrady011235: My dog shit in my apartment
[+9] u/PregnantPickle_: I mean, I lost my job at Wendy’s when I threatened genocide.
[+9] u/Big-Refrigerator1899: really not sure why the astronauts want to come back to this
[+9] u/Icommandyou: Waking up to him claiming he will commit genocide and futures slightly red on the news
[+9] u/No-Sympathy-686: They're bombing the dogs!
They're bombing the cats!
[+9] u/AfraidAnalyst: “Deal or everyone is dead”
Markets - meh, -.4%, he’s not going to kill everyone
[+9] u/BeginnersDuck777: How can someone with a nuclear football say “I’m going to wipe out a civilization” and it has ZERO impact on the market???????
[+9] u/CEOofBeanz: Battlefield 3 was a state mandated training exercise
[+9] u/moosewithamuffin: Piece talks 🔫 going well!
[+9] u/SadDevelopment3049: Everyone and their mom buying puts today. You know what that means.
[+9] u/Frequent_Prize_8600: My entire portfolio will die tonight
[+9] u/CLAMACID: fucking hate my coworkers
[+9] u/killainvest: Found $31 while picking up my kids room, thanks grandma for the birthday money.
[+9] u/Ok_Door_9720: "we're not dropping nukes after all" is somehow going to cause a massive pump across the markets lmao
[+9] u/cat_herder4: I actually can't wait to see how that crazy kid tacos this one...will it be:
a) talks going good let's give it a few more days
b) x asked me nicely to put it off while they try and reason with Iran and I'm a nice guy so I said yes
c) no reason...extend another week
d) I think Europe should do it now and I'm going to "make" them do it themselves
e) my generals told me we shouldn't do it. It would hurt the people too much. The people are begging me to only attack a little bit and we will...
[+9] u/fomoandyoloandnogrow: **CONGRESS IF YOU’RE LISTENING, IF YOU COULD FIND THOSE 30,000 ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT, THE MARKET WOULD BE VERY GRATEFUL**
[+9] u/severed02: Fox News, probably: “Trump threatens nuclear war, but markets only down 0.2%. Most resilient market in history! 4D chess!”
[+9] u/BrunoTMC: If the goal was to make Iran look like a reasonable, level-headed geopolitical actor.... mission accomplished
[+9] u/Burger_Gouger: Dude with the most unhinged tweets we’ve ever seen. Historic moment
[+8] u/Th4tR4nd0mGuy: Dear America,
What the fuck?
Sincerely, everyone else
[+8] u/slimeystevebob: I abhor this timeline. Humans are pathetic.
[+8] u/Chlo-Motion: “A whole civilization will die tonight” -
Is it the bols or the bers??
[+8] u/antpharms: Dude's batshit this morning. Wow.
[+8] u/ResidentPack4103: Futures saying 🥭fake n ghey
[+8] u/jmc774: Full port calls because if they don't print then civilization is fucked anyway and you won't get to enjoy the spoils
[+8] u/LordWop: The more hyperbole the more likely a taco it seems
[+8] u/sleepygarner: I'm cash gang, but my cash don't feel safe
[+8] u/Happy_Fly_7691: 🥭 is a Dalek. Exterminate Exterminate.
[+8] u/PureAlpha22: He cannot wait to drop a nuke
[+8] u/TickTockTaudit: Bully picks fight with smaller kid on playground and pushes him to the ground.
Kid gets back up, stands up for himself, and tells Bully to fuck off.
Bully is SEETHING mad that kid is such a fucking asshole.
[+8] u/InevitableAd2436: We joke about TACO, but he literally does like 90% of the bullshit he says
Shocked this isn’t tanking, unless this is his crew buying calls for one last ride before a giant green candle
[+8] u/WrexyWrex: "Croesus then asked if he should make war on the Persians and if he should take to himself any allied force. The oracles to whom he sent this question included those at Delphi and Thebes. Both oracles gave the same response, that if Croesus made war on the Persians he would destroy a mighty empire."
[+8] u/Free-Championship828: Your options are: living in hell, living in Stone Age, a whole civilization will die tonight. Choose carefully
[+8] u/WrexyWrex: SNL UK is absolutely putting its American counterpart to shame dear lord
[https://bsky.app/profile/theserfstv.bsky.social/post/3miuzotxlq224](https://bsky.app/profile/theserfstv.bsky.social/post/3miuzotxlq224)
[+8] u/Manre831: That shit is Fcking nuts 😂 😂 what if he actually drops a nuke.
[+8] u/DepartureAnxious5115: The beauty of this is we are going to get some fucking awesome movies with either Mark Wahlberg, John Krasinski or Chris Pratt as the lead. Michael Bay is going to have a field day.
[+8] u/CasherburyTales: I tried to tell my boss that I’m not going in because of civilization ending. He yelled TACO at me
[+8] u/Heyumpp: That FIFA fuck has to be really grinning ear to ear with all the peace being doled out by his awardee lately
[+8] u/BoringButUniqueUser: LOL 0 movement on spy. It’s like everyone’s thinking “oh yeah he’s definitely going to TACO” but deep inside they know he’s psychotic enough to pull the trigger
[+8] u/RansomeRandom: We're going back UP??!!!
[+8] u/rayquan36: WSB not believing 🥭 and wondering why SPY isn't believing him either.
[+8] u/branpo26: What’s everyone doing at 8pm tonight?
[+8] u/RonBlake: No TACO>Iran retaliates>blows up Saudi East West pipeline and has Houthis close Bab Al Mandab>global depression
I’m sure our leaders, trained in the television arts, are capable of this simple exercise in cause and effect
[+8] u/SuspiciousStable9649: I’m going to wait for 30 minutes of data after market open, let the market lie to me, buy the wrong way, then bleed the rest of the day. Sound like a plan?
[+8] u/WillTheGreat: Market is really trading as if he’s really going to TACO. The disconnect between oil and the market now is widening. Even if he does backdown it’ll probably be flat or a sell the news event because the price action is showing traders chasing and front running for that liberation day like recovery…which I don’t think it happens.
[+8] u/GMEThrowaway2: Everyone arguing calls or puts haven’t noticed the pattern. On the crazy days where we expect high volatility it stays largely flat and they take everyone’s money. Prediction; today can be an email and we will see the real action later in the week. It’s not fundamentals, it’s the big players printing free money
[+8] u/Arnab_Goswami_RTV: Watch the nuke be delayed by 5 days today to give Iran a “Last” Warning to open the gay.
[+8] u/rm0277: This is what happens when the kids that used to run behind the mosquito fogger truck are allowed to vote
[+8] u/Arnab_Goswami_RTV: 🥭 called for nuke and Gold didn’t even flinched, I call gay, Baron has calls.
[+8] u/OsamaBagHolding: Artemis II is gonna have great seats at the watch party
[+7] u/Specialist_Exam_8433: Ngl this is gonna pump hard at open
[+7] u/Rich-Badger-7601: Extremely conflicted between selling everything before 🥭 nukes Iran tonight or holding everything for the massive surge when he 🌮 last second
[+7] u/Cat_From_Jupiter: Fuck man, I miss waking up knowing adults were in charge.
[+7] u/Philly8181: Taking notes on how to win a peace prize, wipe out entire civilization, got it.
[+7] u/Odd-Spray5046: Just ordered a pizza from the place near the pentagon will
Let you know how long it takes to arrive
[+7] u/CEOofBeanz: The IRGC has absorbed every single attack by Delta Force using their foreheads. Looks they’re winning
[+7] u/Bernardhops2: You can tell he wants this over, he’s spinning. They are going to do a massive bomb run, then immediately withdraw saying we won, and then a new news story to focus on.
[+7] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: That frontal lobe is *rotting*
[+7] u/RansomeRandom: Dude if we get another fucking flat day or worse, record green day tomorrow, I'll call into work.
[+7] u/McClintockC: Ber r fuk
Bol r fuk
Amerifuk
[+7] u/summit_ice24: Trump threatens to nuke a country: Market stays even, don't want to overreact, probably will taco
Trump does not end up nuking country: bullish!! Market up 10%!! What a great president!
[+7] u/MothRatten: Spamming conflicting news in here with no links. Bots tryna fuck with the algos lol
[+7] u/thehust: That tweet is setting the mood for taco later in the day
[+7] u/TrumpChildOnahole: 100% this'll pump to green by 10
[+7] u/hollywoodrew: Market knows 🥭 going to fold. Otherwise we’d be at -2% rn. Calls EZ$$$$
[+7] u/Odd-Spray5046: Crazy how my workplace takes more care with what we post on LinkedIn to our 500 followers than the literal President of the United States
[+7] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: All seriousness aside, y’all saying taco always makes me want to get a taco
[+7] u/puffinnbluffin: Love this place. Back to back comments - “Will today be black Tuesday?” & “all time high next week!”.. 😂
[+7] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Lost
/u/dimadomelachimola made a bet that USO would go to 150.0 within **5 days** when it was 138.774 and it did not, so they were banned for a week.
Their record is now 0 wins and 2 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+7] u/melvinzee: Iran will send him a note saying - "lets talk." at 7pm.
He will taco, and tomorrow they will say, we said lets talk but we did not agree to anything.
Then he has to restart the timer. Man I just want to rest.
[+7] u/br0botic: Will he nuke? WHO KNOWS
Find out next time on dragon ball z
[+7] u/Ok-Thought-9960: We live in the only timeline ever where one can lose money on puts the same day a president of the "free" world threatens genocide on there own platform.
[+7] u/Brown_Sandals: So much for the anti-war president
[+7] u/CEO-of-SOXL: Taking out an entire civilization in one night, Ghengis and Alexander would be proud. 🇺🇸
[+7] u/No-Improvement3164: I’m still trying to find his supporters that are cheering him on. They under a rock somewhere?🤔
[+7] u/NOT_A_OFFICER: I feel like the Tiger King should come back in this episode of Earth.
[+7] u/Micheal_Hancho: You know things are fucked up when reddit admins give you a 3 day ban for quoting 🌮 LMAO
[+7] u/AfraidAnalyst: Does this mean today is going to be another low volume theta day because markets don’t fully know if he will TACO tonight?
[+7] u/RollofDuctTape: What page of the Art of the Deal is “threaten to wipe out your counterparty and his entire family.”
[+7] u/Huskies971: God help us we have a clown as president and not a good clown like Ronald McDonald, we have the alcoholic clown from the airbud movie.
[+7] u/RexLaminaII: I heard an entire civilization is gonna die tonight
[+7] u/crossdefaults: It's literally like a meme: civilization about to end. SPY down nearly one percent.
[+7] u/TripleChocolate123: \- SPY OI is nearly double puts to calls overall
\- Iran has mentioned no interest in a ceasefire, and neither has Trump.
\- Charts show us overextended from last week's bull run
\- Big money (banks/institutions) loaded up on puts yesterday.
Take that as you will.
[+7] u/doernotspeaker: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+7] u/hiphopanonomos: He makes a deadline on taco tuesday and wonders why no one believes him
[+7] u/8675309l: Record difference between spot WTI and futures. Spot pricing is the actual price a purchaser pays for physical oil it’s about $40 over the futures price we all see. Market manipulation is in full swing.
[+7] u/Advanced_Structure21: Remember when the market would drop 3% when 🥭hinted at escalation? Good times.
[+7] u/RoundMammoth2947: Market pumping because article 25 is being invoked.
[+7] u/rand_walking_charts: It’s going to be flat boring day 😂
[+7] u/StraitOfHummus: Guys, the Kharg Island Bar and Grill just blew up. I don't know why they would bomb the best burger and shawarma joint on the island, but here we are. The oil we fried the falafel and the potatos in was so light and sweet!
[+7] u/OsamaBagHolding: The most wild part is that something even stupider is gonna happen in a few weeks that we'll basically forget about this moment.
Breath it in and enjoy it while you can.
[+7] u/Fresh_Internal_6085: Surely at least one of his secret service detail has a pending divorce, child support, a drinking problem and nothing left to live for..
[+7] u/mixtape312: SPY will close green, bookmark it
[+7] u/Aldribuds: #Open the casino you crazy bastard
[+7] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: Waking up to 🥭 tweeting threats about killing an entire civilization like he's Mao Zedong sure made me confident in the future of our nation lmao
[+7] u/Bichael-Murry: THE DUMP WILL BE CIVILIZATIONAL
[+7] u/StraitOfHummus: We are now negotiating with the 4th regime, do not make us negotiate with a 5th! We blew up the last 3!
-Mango, probably
[+7] u/Unhedged-Fund: operation epic short squeeeze
[+7] u/iDahves: Bought puts to hold overnight and was expecting the market to fully grasp the situation we’re entering. Can’t wait for 15% gain
[+7] u/KindlyTie6602: Civilizations dying is now bullish?
[+7] u/7fingersDeep: Can't use the strait if it's full of nuclear fallout.
Fucking 5D chess move. TACO is the master negotiator.
[+6] u/netflix-ceo: IRAN HAS CLOSED ALL DIPLOMATIC AND INDIRECT CHANNELS WITH THE US.
BULLLLISSSHHH!!!
[+6] u/rbatra91: Which civilization though?
[+6] u/Gom_KBull: every year since 2021 NKE gets more tempting to buy long term...
* *its dirt cheap but you know its gonna keep going down*
* *nice dividends*
* *the idea of making money indirectly from arrogant sneakerheads is so satisfying*
ill give it another year
[+6] u/sharpyz: I just woke up... bruh
[+6] u/WindNo3445: # HAPPY TACO TUESDAY EVERYONE
[+6] u/PompeiiSketches: If you still think the market can go down after it refused to give up last week’s fraudulent pump then I don’t know what to tell you.
STOCKS. GO. UP.
[+6] u/AcademicStandard3701: Bears checking in 😤 ready for drill team 6 to come out of retirement!!
[+6] u/SuspiciousStable9649: Morning to mid afternoon pump to hit the doomers then MMs build their own short positions and dump the market?
[+6] u/Pretty_Ad_7885: He is going to nuke them isnt he?
[+6] u/Philly8181: The strait of Hormuz will be renamed the bendy of Hormuz to reflect it's shape and this is a huge victory.
[+6] u/grimandnordic1: All I want is a big fat géy -2% day on SPY so I can load up on some big fat long calls
[+6] u/neverseengreen: Well atleast i got the robinhood gold card, my port is dead but i can reclaim it with the 3%
[+6] u/MadeThatCash: The irony of destroying their nuclear capability and then dropping a nuke FFS that damn pedo
[+6] u/newtoeso: Sent that last 🥭 tweet to Gemini and I’ll take a phrase out of what it said:
“If the world ends, you'll be glad you have the cash”.
Like wtf?
[+6] u/Due-Information-6277: That doesn’t sound like 🌮
[+6] u/frogger1988: "A whole civilization will die tonight"
.. believe it or not, calls
[+6] u/Ready_Scratch_1902: Imagine being his neighbor and your shrubs are a little overgrown
[+6] u/NaturalFortune8397: today might really be a puts are free money day
you only get one of these every five years
[+6] u/VanwallEnjoy3r: But but but muh tanned suit
[+6] u/winston511: What would Mike Pence do
[+6] u/FusselP0wner: Every day is just a test to see how much sh*t everyone is willing to accept. Aint seen a single real uprising anywhere. Markets got everything priced in aswell - as always. So just move along, we closing green as usual
[+6] u/EntranceHaunting: Oil is dropping, S&P is pumping. Right on time for open
[+6] u/Competitive-Water944: 🥭 twerk bussy bro. You’re washed
[+6] u/MikeyS2k: Is this a dump for ants?
[+6] u/Upset-Motor-2602: Pull up a chair, sit on the sidelines, and enjoy the shitshow.
[+6] u/hvc801: Because Iran... Iran so far away.
[+6] u/Fernyfern7: The taco will be served at 730 pm
[+6] u/shinigami_2245: Just saw a BYD electric semi truck in the wild, puts on everything, we’re fuckin cooked
[+6] u/Bravadette: Mourning VIX. Grieving, even.
[+6] u/rizzdragon: How will nuking Iran affect the rare fish market?
[+6] u/Status-Net2947: I can feel how the market wants to go up desperately. Just a tiny bullish move needed for this to erupt
[+6] u/wongbonger: "the machines are made in europe
the chips made in taiwan
and the profits made in america 👊🇺🇲🔥"
[+6] u/undertrip: only regarded bulls thinks he will actually taco tonight
[+6] u/sm04d: Have the Iranians said thank you?!
[+6] u/GuyFieriFrostedTips: How’s 🥭 going to 🌮 this time?
[+6] u/Okami_The_Sun: Get ready for bols to explain how wiping out a civilization is bullish
[+6] u/AMCorBUST2021: “Whole civilization will die tonight”
My broker you never want to take your 401k out even in nuclear winter. It will rebuild!
[+6] u/Green_Bumblebee1848: on the brink of WW3 and SPY wants to go green haahahahahahahah this market is so manipulated its not funny lol
[+6] u/Independent-List-242: Mango: the art of the not deal
[+5] u/Apfelmoes_: Reading 🥭 between the lines it sounds like they're about to deploy nuclear weapons against Iran?
[+5] u/StockB0Y: We live in a time where an active president is treating nuclear annilation yet the stock market can only go down a percent at best nuke it
[+5] u/Odd-Spray5046: this buffoon has made an absolute mockery of the role of the POTUS. Whoever comes next will look like an impostor taking their job seriously
[+5] u/Most_Newspaper306: Yeah the dumb fat orange king is gonna 🌮, but the war will not be over and the Strait won't be openis thus pure retardium here?
[+5] u/12justanotherlurker: Believe it or not, calls!
[+5] u/zeren1ty: I’m all cash but at this point I’d love to see big money get crushed by a reverse TACO here, the smugness of them to keep spy propped up after that reckless 🥭tweet and crude oil at nearly all time highs really is something
[+5] u/lullckkillers: We really are insane
[+5] u/2muchnet42day: A whole group of BEARS will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will.
[+5] u/DingleJingle_: That "are we the baddies" meme hittin different this morning.
[+5] u/Bloomeyer: can’t wait for talks going well and spy jumps 2% to fuck my puts
[+5] u/csvt2354: Shame on me for holding calls overnight Donal Frump
[+5] u/OsamaBagHolding: Greta Thunberg has gotta be punching air right now that donald has already done so much to stop fossil fuels than her
[+5] u/TickTockTaudit: Today is National “No Housework” Day! Oh and National “A Whole Civilization Will Die Tonight” Day!
[+5] u/egauifan: lol 9 million shares of micron short since yesterday.
[+5] u/TropicalOinkment: Extra spicy taco today = 0DTE far OTM Puts, inshallah
[+5] u/Bravadette: This looks even worse when you imagine looking back on these times.
[+5] u/codespyder: Is pedobro gonna nuke Iran?
[+5] u/Pluth: I should take a shower.
[+5] u/TrumpChildOnahole: How is this only down 0.40%
[+5] u/Advanced_Structure21: I wonder if they already have the cell made up at The Hague
[+5] u/Ready_Scratch_1902: Sipping coffee. Waiting for blood to flow across markets again.
[+5] u/Antiwhippy: Honestly smart for Trump to make vance go opposite to what he's saying really. Really keeps people on their toes.
[+5] u/lysergalien: Can I have those tacos con todo por favor
[+5] u/Just_Learned_This: This is why I don't listen to you reres
[+5] u/mneymaker: Fellow bulls, ignore your trading apps today, let's just visualize tomorrow gainz
What colour lambo are you ordering is GREEN too provocative for the bears?
[+5] u/Crazy_Reporter_7516: Why is USO losing momentum in premarket 😔
[+5] u/winston511: Ah yes INTC, the well known geo political indicator
[+5] u/7fingersDeep: MANGO: I'm gonna say some wild crazy shit to drop the bottom even further and then I'm gonna say some semi-wild positive shit that brings us up just a little lower than we were before and everyone is going to call it a win.
[+5] u/Kabrosif: Markets priced in Civilization Ending. Love to see it
[+5] u/LiveInLayers: Market pumps and trump issues ultimatum or prospect of peace buy puts. Peace doesn't happen and market tanks then immediately sell puts at market open before pump. Rinse repeat.
[+5] u/decjr06: 🥭 has ruined 🌮 Tuesday for me it just doesn't hit like it used to.... Maybe taco Thursday will work better
[+5] u/Smurf_Crime_Scene: Oil prices are about to moon... if not mars.
And for what?
He saw a hornets nest and he had to shake it
[+5] u/Hot_Avocado_2701: In less than an hour timeframe: iran will be destroyed, we think a deal will be made, us & iran both reject ceasefire, we believe 8pm there will be a deal
Eh?
[+5] u/WrexyWrex: WASHINGTON (AP) — Warns a 'whole civilization will die tonight' but says Iran still has time to capitulate before 8 p.m. ET deadline.
[+5] u/Maximum-Cash7103: The market isn’t down because of one of the golden rules: actions speak louder than words.
[+5] u/kbeks: It’d be funny if after we get TACO Tuesday, Iran got their proxies to close the Red Sea just so Trump’s calls don’t print.
[+5] u/Plebbitsoy: Surely 🥭 isnt this retarded and its all posturing otherwise we are all doomed
[+5] u/hobelhouse: Oooh yeah gimme a hit of that copium pipe hnng COUGH COUGH HACK fuck it's just resin
[+5] u/tandoori_taco_cat: You've had 'War of the Roses', now you can have 'War of the Idiots'
[+5] u/soyeahiknow: Nobel peace prize to THE blood clot.
[+5] u/rottenfence: We nuked Japan and now we have a great relationship.. so for the sake of my port I’m gonna convince myself this is bullish.
[+5] u/Coley44: The actions of a 🥭 that wishes for a Nobel Peace Prize to be sure
[+5] u/weewoowewoooo: Kharg island attack already started and USO at 141 but SPY still flat lmfao. This market is fucking regarded
[+25] u/Beelzebussin: Market aside this dude is genuinely evil that post was insane
[+24] u/Bizonistic: BREAKING NEWS: this is what a mushroom cloud looks like from Artemis II
[+23] u/FuturelyKnownAsCrust: As a single issue voter (all I cared about was the ballroom being built), I am fine with everything taking place.
[+20] u/BurstingTitan88: 🥭: I WILL NOT END THIS “MILITARY ACTION” UNTIL FAKE NEWS STOPS BULLYING ME ON MY BEST FRIEND JEFFREY EPSTEIN
[+19] u/Zimoula: Apple down 4%, nvda down, mag7 down, iran cut ceasfire talks
Spy: lemme stay at this price
[+19] u/urahozer: Prez says a civilization will end tonight, and we're not even a full % down.
A legitimate casino is less rigged
[+19] u/Any_Life_6178: When will you fucks realize he can’t taco out of something he DOESN’T CONTROL?!
[+16] u/WhyyyLuigi: What if Mango 🥭 really is actually trying to tank the market, and the economy just isn’t taking him seriously 😭
[+16] u/BjergBetterThanFaker: It feels weird to make money off of someone threatening to commit genocide on 100million people tonight ...idk
[+16] u/Red_V_Standing_By: Threatening nuclear holocaust against a bunch of religious zealots who want to be martyrs is a choice
[+16] u/Independent_Term5790: Even if we get peace, hasn’t the oil capacity been completely fucked anyway so logically we go down?
[+16] u/PablosCocaineHippo: BREAKING: Donald just remembered Iran is over 2600 years old and not 12, so he's gonna pull out
[+15] u/lobsterspider: Being a bear rn is easy
Just assume the most retarded man alive will keep being retarded
[+15] u/twistnblaze: the only bol thesis right now is TACO
[+15] u/No-Insurance100: As evil as GW Bush was, he had the presence of mind not to act/talk like this publicly. Markets should be -10%, but too many people are wary of another incoming manipulation by plunge protection team
[+15] u/kairepaire: -0.9% is very underwhelming considering the situation
[+14] u/Internal_Field5970: WSB told me that 🥭 is a mentally retarded person
[+14] u/oatmeal-claypole: I miss having Biden around
[+14] u/Largeshmarge: I can’t believe I was able to buy puts at a regular price. Even if they go to 0, it was the right choice.
[+14] u/neaturee: Bols thought they had it in the bag
[+13] u/Comfortable733: Imagine the legacy of your negotiating skills is chickening out 💀
[+13] u/Nagalavonpelt: 115 dollar per barrel and the markets like……. Yeah we ain’t bothered 😂😂
JGTFO shits insane 🤣
[+13] u/ShitStainStoop: Mfer just said “just a whole civilization will die tonight never to be brought back” sound like peace talks progressing well
[+13] u/kim82352: Iran is calling Trump's bluff. They want him to attack.
> Iran has closed all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States.
> Any and all message exchanges have also been suspended.
[+13] u/DealNormal8505: bulls think if they just say taco enough the market ill go up. lol
[+13] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Bro it never ceases to piss me off when we pump off bad news, then eventually have a small dump on more bad news and bulls are like : "WhY iS It dROpPinG!?!?"
[+13] u/No_Current3675: operation EPIC FUCKTARD
[+13] u/gainsusmaximus: Liberation day walked so bridge and power plant day could run
[+13] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: TOTAL ANNIHILATION!
SPY be like - "Best I can do is -.9%"
[+13] u/FiveEggHeads: how is the market going... up?
[+12] u/StonklordBenno: 3 more years of this shit..
[+12] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: Stupidest fuckin timeline. Taking this regard seriously is like trying to demystify the ramblings of your neighborhood meth addict. Too bad this meth addict holds the nuclear football
[+12] u/Numerous-Stand-1841: Market is already pricing in TACO that's why it's not going down more
[+12] u/twistnblaze: ber trap.. wait bol trap..... i mean ber trap. or is it a bol trap?
[+12] u/SxeySteve: "A whole civilization will die tonight"
And *I'm* the one with derangement???
[+12] u/Cutalana: > A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will.
🥭 makes Hitler look like a nuanced villain
[+12] u/IgorOlshanksy: Aerys II Targaryen, known as the "Mad King," was the last Targaryen ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, infamous for his descent into insanity, paranoia, and cruelty, which ultimately led to his downfall and the end of his dynasty. Initially a charming and promising king, his reign deteriorated after a period of imprisonment, leading him to burn enemies alive and plot to destroy King's Landing with wildfire, a plan thwarted by Jaime Lannister, who killed him, earning the nickname "Kingslayer".
[+12] u/DealNormal8505: i had a conversation with my republican sped friend. he claoimed kamala wouldve been just as bad for the stock market and the economy cuz, reasons? lol
[+12] u/OkAlternative7705: Not even 1% down after going up 5% last 5 days. Still manipulated as shit
[+12] u/Mr_Worst_Timing: Imagine just waking up and threatening an entire civilization.
[+12] u/Tacosdonahue: it's one little civilization Michael. How much could it cost?
[+11] u/Memes_Jack: Tehran Times:
\#BREAKING
Iran has closed all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States.
Any and all message exchanges have also been suspended.
[+11] u/Historical_Edge_3325: This is getting ugly today huh?
[+11] u/Icy-Leave-9111: Let’s be real, you gotta be a complete regard to buy calls with current situation so calls it is
[+11] u/CallsOrPutsYES: # CALLS ON VAULT-TEC
[+11] u/Blacksin01: There are rumors trump is pushing for using nukes on Iran.
[+11] u/Fineous40: No one has ever won the FIFA peace prize two years in a row.
[+11] u/davidbigham: Dear diary,
This is day 36 of the two weeks operation.
[+11] u/Cav829: People clinging to the hopes Iran and the U.S. are going to come to a deal right now sound like the background characters in a romcom watching two people scream and throw objects at each other talking about how they need to just fuck already.
[+11] u/mannycalls24: LMAO bulls really fell for the trap 🐻🪤🐂
[+11] u/mrsweettreats: How do you walk yourself back out of "ending all civilization"
Blame it on a staffer?
[+11] u/ksyoung17: We're gonna Nuke Iran.
Market: VVVVVVVVVVVV!!!!
[+10] u/pigslick: i’m just dumb enough to buy puts
[+10] u/Icy-Leave-9111: Market acting like 2008 oil prices and 2021 stimulus stock price
[+10] u/Koki4kok: Sold my call, here comes the taco and the deal.
+3% eod
[+10] u/Acefanatik: 🥭went from wanting to liberate Iranians into wiping them forever in 24 hours
[+10] u/fknbtch: no one is nuking anything. they want the oil.
[+10] u/Garbage-Disposal-938: The Orangest man in history just said, "A whole civilization will die tonight" and of course you have to wonder if it's like the old story of the Oracle of Delphi where the leader asks the oracle if he should attack a rival empire and the oracle says something like, "if you do, a great empire will be destroyed." And then, of course, he does attack that rival and then I forget what happens after that. IDK.
[+10] u/shmito17: 25th amendment when? That truth post is fkn insane
[+10] u/Avocadonot: Lmao this is pathetic. What a measly "dip"
We went down -6% on liberation day
[+10] u/theekhai: This isn’t tariffs 🥭 can’t TACO. Few understand this. Iran holds all the cards. So either he nukes/bombs the fuck out of them and puts boots on the ground or he completely retreats and pays Iran and tells Israel to retreat too. You tell me which he’s gonna choose.
[+10] u/Personal-Boss-7111: Imagine nuking a country just bc your military is incapable of taking over a strait and your diplomacy skills are shit.
[+10] u/OptionGamble: We are ruled by the worst people. But hey it’s what America wanted.
[+10] u/lucrefilms: Apparently the threat of nuclear war is priced in
[+10] u/FelixMumuHex: Trump wants to Alderaan Iran
[+10] u/ckami_91: Trump: ALL BULLZ WILL DIE TONIGHT
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
TACO TUESDAY.. TOMORROW WAR CRIMES WEDNESDAY
[+10] u/internetf1fan: Holy sheet. They just nuked iran
[+10] u/mbdtf95: After all this ends, names of 77,302,580 people should be publicly posted online.
[+10] u/TurbodToilet: Market dumps as soon as I sold my puts for a 15% profit.. would be up like 90% now. Story of my life
[+10] u/DealNormal8505: maga is truly a cult dude it does not matter what he does. they will always copium up a defense for him
[+10] u/nocashflow_: please put market back on easy mode, thanks
[+10] u/TempestDrive: I still believe taco will taco today
[+10] u/61742: I just hope my puts from last week are watching from heaven.
[+9] u/cheddarkittyy: This is exactly how everyone predicted it’s gonna go. Bombing of Iran, then take the island, then being attacked on the islands have to take the coast, then being attacked on the coast have to take mountain territories. Good luck zoomer Americans on the draft lottery
[+9] u/trainwreck001: CIVILIZATION DESTRUCTION HAS COMMENCED.
BE SAFE OUT THERE.
OIL $500
[+9] u/ShitStainStoop: Iran cancels all diplomatic and indirect channels of communication with the United States and announces the suspension of any and all message exchanges – IRIB
[+9] u/platinumarks: 8:01PM Eastern:
"Nuclear launch detected"
Bols: "LOL, he's gonna TACO this too. Right? Right...?"
Bols (20 seconds later): "OH SHIT"
[+9] u/Illustrious_Pair2990: Made $600 shorting SPY and my day is done
[+9] u/TacticalTackleBox: Can't really have peace talk when most of the IRGC is de-centralized and executing their own regional commands, most of the people in charge of the IRGC aren't even talking to each other, let alone some loose command structure that keeps getting killed.
[+9] u/Fieryhotsauce: Kamala looking pretty good right now I bet Murica
[+9] u/Any-Development5656: stoopid bols,
haha bers really thought.
Is this all your vocabulary?
[+9] u/Extension-Ad917: SPY in stage 1: Denial
[+9] u/silverfutes: I notified my neighbors I will be negotiating individual passage down my street.
[+9] u/NaiveMercury: Do you believe in ~~life~~ **V** after ~~love~~ **V**?
[+9] u/myironlung6: Iran closes all diplomatic and indirect channels of contact with the US - Tehran Times
[+9] u/hayleybts: How spy is holding is beyond me
[+9] u/DealNormal8505: mango isint going to nuke iran come on guys. hes just going to invade iran and well be there for 20 years and waste 40 trillion dollerinos
[+9] u/el_ketchup: Yo earning money from puts for bombing other countries doesn't feel so good
[+9] u/rcantu314: Be fearful when others are fearful
[+9] u/MyDogsNameIsTim: Watch him taco out by signing a nuclear deal that's just a carbon copy of the Obama deal, but Obama's name is scribbled out
[+9] u/whydouhatemecablegod: we don't need iphones where we're going
[+9] u/InitiativeGlum2507: Phew, I'm only down 100k
[+9] u/Moocat2855: A whole civilization will die. “Bullish” said the permabulls 🤡
[+9] u/urahozer: Everytime I trade small I win, then I get the courage to make a big one and I reset myself.
[+9] u/DealNormal8505: this is truly 1d chess
[+9] u/Snowman33001: Remember when some in Michigan/Minnesota didn’t vote for Harris because she supported Israel too much?
[+8] u/JugoShvili: You could pull a quarter out from behind the SPY’s ear and it would go up +2%. The market is not just irrational; it’s straight up retarded. Which I guess makes sense since it’s just the collective decisions of millions of retards.
[+8] u/FeverTreeCloud: Whole civilization will die tonight 💀💀💀
[+8] u/soup4br3kfast: Hillarious that cramer called bottom yesterday
[+8] u/Helpful-Pear3368: More dancing ghey bears! Yeehaw! 💃💃💃🤣
[+8] u/Classic-Test4979: so genocide is bullish?
[+8] u/Snoo23417: Somebody give this man a nobel peace prize.
[+8] u/Horror-Life-5225: Can't believe I sold expecting a drop, this market makes no sense
[+8] u/Mutanic2: How’s it not down more with a potential nuclear attack on its way? Shit is rigged
[+8] u/Snoo23417: He did say that a whole civilization is dying today. Did he specify which one?
[+8] u/iGotStuckIn: #Just a reminder:
The mods are jealous that they never got to go to Epstein’s Island
[+8] u/ShortPossession8267: Sad part is this is just the start of the dump
[+8] u/lSazedl: Mango really said a whole civilization will die tonight...believe it or not, calls
[+8] u/vee1rot8: An entire civilization of regarded traders will be wiped out today, never to be brought back again.
[+8] u/Viktri1: Buy gold you fking crazy bastards
[+8] u/Carfar_Farcar: So we nuke Iran, Russia sees nukes as free game now and nukes Ukraine, India tries to beat Pakistan to the punch but they have the same idea and they nuke each other, etc, etc, etc.
*I mean* of course he'll end up doing a TACO anything else would be crazy.
[+8] u/Pro-Tip810: Last week seem like exit liquidity
[+8] u/DancesWithWolvesss: I hate small drops. Can we have a major drop where the Dow Jones becomes 20000?
[+8] u/2keyed: I found out there’s a Korean twitch and they have their own twitch thots and I’m lost down that hole.
Please help
[+8] u/peterpeer9: puts = we die
calls = free money
[+7] u/urahozer: President said he'd end a civilization during trading hours and not even a % down is like the dealer pulling a 9 card 21 after you doubled down for a 20.
[+7] u/Poptart_Salad: Well now we know, threaten to destroy an entire civilization and the markets can barely sell off a couple percent.
[+7] u/ckami_91: Buy calls.. market drops
Buy puts.. market pumps
LMAOOO
[+7] u/Any_Refrigerator2330: What's 🥭 plan? Use a nuclear weapons or something?
[+7] u/MyDogsNameIsTim: Genuinely rooting for a coup at this point.
[+7] u/Subject_Delay5447: Pretty sure my port's gonna die before that civilization does tonight
[+7] u/Horatio2200: War crimes Wednesday. How exciting......
[+7] u/Pretend_Bluebird_53: Bro puts lose value soo fucking fast its unreal
[+7] u/Spirited-Two1431: Final pump before the epic dumps
[+7] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Lmao bulls should be happy the market still hasn't reacted to the 10% jump in oil prices
[+7] u/LarsTarkas: Going to be another low volume day. No one wants to make any moves in this clown timeline
[+7] u/iCancel69: Trump: I am going to wipe a civilization
SPY: Levels not seen since yesterday
[+7] u/Comfortable733: Feeling nukey. Might delete later
[+7] u/Any_Life_6178: You’ll still be able to connect to Netflix in your bunker
[+7] u/DealNormal8505: trump is doing the thing where he threatens an insane thing ie ground invasion, then he backtracks, then he threatens simething even more insane ie nukes, and then he backtracks to the original insane thing and does it and then everyone is like this is fine
[+7] u/hudson701: i can't believe he just put that tweet out publicly... He has no class or decorum whatsoever
[+7] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: if you cant handle me at my 652 then you dont deserve me at my 640
[+7] u/nadoterisback: getting spy ath soon vibes
[+7] u/OkResponsibility2470: Don’t worry guys we’re good until the billionaires start simultaneously flying their private jets out of the country
[+7] u/hardcrepe: Everything is bouncing back and forth like crazy because not even the algos believe him 100% anymore.
[+7] u/MoreOutcome8541: Hell yeah my puts are printing, might go watch some heated rivalry to celebrate
[+7] u/Moocat2855: “A civilization will die tonight”. “Bullish” “priced in already” “market only goes up” “blurghuugu” said the tarded 🐂s. 🫵🤡
[+7] u/Dr_Vibe_Check: I’m knee deep in puts, sorry guys we’re gonna recovery green
[+6] u/urraca: I really didn't expect the only winner of the FIFA peace prize ever to act this way.
[+6] u/Neverluckyinosrs: Bottom for the day is in. It’s happened thousands of times before, and bears think today will be different
[+6] u/spurkulator: is it a hold puts all day kinda day or take profit now kinda day?
[+6] u/lSazedl: Surprised we're not down more. Might be one of the most unhinged things Mango has said
[+6] u/elephantsaregray: Trump is tacoing. This is just the bluster before the Taco. Any type of escalation - ground troops, nukes, genocide by destroying water and power is untenable for the midterms. Trump needs midterms to not being in jail. It's TACO all the way boys. If it dips, buy it. Because Taco is pumping after hours tonight.
[+6] u/billyd1984texas: What is this idiot going to do
[+6] u/JPenniman: Maybe we can go back to 630s
[+6] u/PositiveEdge4361: Holy shit man what kind of tweet is that
[+6] u/Namtabmal: At this point im worried if there will even be a market tomorrow.
[+6] u/DatsMaPurse_IDKU: Are you feeling it now Mr Krabs?
[+6] u/Fineous40: Good faith violations are lame
[+6] u/Key_Abroad7633: If we actually follow through the market willl go limit down tomorrow
[+6] u/SSkilledJFK: People keep saying 🌮 gonna 🌮. I’m like, bitch he’s been supreme 🌮 this whole time *and it is not working*.
[+6] u/Helpful-Pear3368: You dare bring a V… there shall be no V-ing… dance my bears! 💃💃💃🤣
[+6] u/Illustrious_Lion7671: WHERE IS JAMIE LANNISTER WHEN YOU NEED HIM?
[+6] u/LurkerPatrol: Dog where is the volume?
[+6] u/FGoobs: Only people buying are the 20% of Americans wearing a red hat. Only people selling are the 10% of Americans thinking the apocalypse is coming. That leaves 70% of Americans waiting for a 🌮
[+6] u/kim82352: > US may decide to use tools against Iran it hasn’t so far decided to use — JD Vance
[+6] u/Kind-Recognition4528: Just let the dump continue
[+6] u/SoothingWafer: Sad thing is since the SEC isn't doing anything, he can just tweet shit like this and he and his consorts can just continually insider trade up and down for infinite money.
[+6] u/Cold_Distribution273: Guess who sold their puts at open for a messily 20% gain
[+6] u/JayRoo83: Oil is going to 150 a barrel huh
[+6] u/FrostingOk2692: First move is gay, second move is also gay. You are gay.
[+6] u/damnthatbooty: Can we dump this shit hard so this retard stops
[+5] u/Soger91: I miss circuit breakers, everything after COVID just feels dull
[+5] u/Silver-Speaker7104: Being a ber is expensive
[+5] u/Fluffy-Discussion166: Nuking Iran would make the whole middle east unliveable.
[+5] u/whitewashedsyrian: “Why isn’t the market doing what it should be doing” ultimate regard comment
[+5] u/SerialStrategist: Nuking Iran would make the strait of homos inaccessible to anyone from the radiation fallout. The little hand man really said, "If we can't have it, no one can"! A toddler with nuclear codes....
[+5] u/DarthTraderrr: mr president my calls need help
[+5] u/ChrispyChicken1208: He’ll taco before 8pm today probably at like 2pm
[+5] u/Competitive_Ride: One TACO coming right up
[+39] u/victoriasecretion: 🥭 tweets tariffs news: market dumps -4%
🥭 tweets erasing a civilization off earth -1%
[+25] u/doscervezas2017: It's summer in the year 2000. Your dad brought his work laptop home and is letting you install Diablo II for the weekend. Your little sister is blasting NSYNC's "No Strings Attached" album, but you don't care. You just built a Barbarian and are fighting Blood Raven's skeleton army. Your fluffy orange cat is asleep on the bed next to you, as you sip a can of Brisk Iced Tea.
All the news coverage is about that Richard guy on the new show Survivor.
You don't know what put options, a condor spread, or the Strait of Hormuz are.
You don't know it now, but life is the best it will ever be.
[+24] u/Sea_Condition_6999: 🥭 talk aside.
It's kinda wild that the US president is openly threatening another country like this on the internet.
Image George Bush bullying Sadam on MySpace.
[+20] u/McKoijion: > UNITED STATES AND ISRAEL ARE INTENSIFYING ATTACKS IN AN EFFORT TO FORCE IRAN TO OPEN THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ AND REACH A CEASE-FIRE DEAL – NY TIMES
Bruh
[+20] u/New_Internet_3965: How tf did we manage to turn into the bad guys against Iran?!?! You’d have to be full on acoustic to be that bad at foreign policy
[+20] u/Worldly_Purple6512: If this gets 10 upvotes. I’ll keep my 0tds puts … this is my deposit for my apartment this week
[+19] u/Disastrous_Pay3314: # 'A whole civilization will die tonight'
'Where's my peace prize?"
[+19] u/burnerAccountDuh24: This price action just shows how full of shit everyone thinks 🥭is
[+18] u/DCrebuilds: People saw SPY recover .05% and got excited
[+17] u/Ok-End-3213: Bombing civilian infrastructure is an extremely bitch move and is a clear indication we have no leverage
[+17] u/FartPolluter: Pretty disgraceful USA are so openly admitting they are about to break pretty much every international norm and rule so openly this day and age. Honestly, at this stage i barely give a fuck about stocks
[+16] u/Loperenco: Iran broke all US contacts XDDDDD
PUTS ALL THE WAY BOYS, HOLD DEARLY TO THEM IF YOU WANT TO LIVE
[+16] u/PretendAgency2702: Market is dumb.
Mango says hes going to wipe them off the map. Market down less than 1%.
Sources say something will happen. Market jumps 4%.
[+16] u/New_Internet_3965: How long until Taco announces a ceasefire that Iran didn’t actually agree to?
[+16] u/Fast_Garlic_5639: Oh we’re dropping dropping
[+15] u/stellarfan: TRUMP TELLS FOX NEWS IF NEGOTIATIONS ADVANCE AND THERE IS SOMETHING TANGIBLE WE MIGHT EXTEND THE DEADLINE: AL ARABIYA
Its Taco time beeeeeers
[+15] u/1-800-FunkMaster: Imagine nuking Iran to get away from the Epstein files. Mamma Mia
[+15] u/Bitter_Ad_2500: Let me guess at 8pm tonight, "They have reached out to us, talks are going great so far. I'll extend the deadline by 10 days, give them some time." Same old BS 🥭
[+15] u/rkillaaa: djt said "a whole civilization will die tonight" what a crazy time we're in lol
[+15] u/Habefiet: It’s depressing that this thread is a better source of news than most news outlets and other subs. Everybody else has an agenda that they try to obscure; everybody here has an agenda that is just “oh fuck, my money” which is refreshingly honest and also means that everybody here is giving *minutely* updates on literally everything that’s happening in the world that is a large enough event that it could plausibly affect the economy in any way whatsoever. There’s something weird and special about that.
Oh uh sorry sir, did you want fries with that?
[+15] u/hallett21: SPY objectively should be down 1.5% right now.
[+15] u/Pazzaaaaaa: Bulls really thought a 3 day dead cat bounce was the start of a bull run LOL
[+15] u/abused-throwawayy: Imagine hearing “No new wars” and falling for that shit lmAO
[+15] u/Gnargoyle420: A whole civilization will die tonight, and that civilization is ber
[+15] u/chairforce01: 🥭's last few Iran tweets are too on the nose. Openly stating that a whole civilization is going to die tonight is so beyond the pale that it just can't be taken seriously. Its probably the strongest counterfactual signal he's given.
He's a reality tv host trying to "raise the stakes" for the "dramatic" resolution that, as he sees it, makes him look like a "strong/hero/genius negotiator" and makes them librul lunatics look alarmist for falling for it along the way.
I mean mayyyybe hes not bluffing and we do end up with boots on the ground, but just to be clear, an order to glass the country tonight wouldn't be followed. He doesn't have the button in his pocket, just the "authority" to request it. Several layers of more serious humans that understand the implications of instantly killing millions of civilians and plunging the world into chaos would have to physically execute it.
Calls, cause what are you going to even do with your monopoly money if puts ends up being correct?
[+14] u/Immediate-Coast-5066: # Hours Before Trump's Deadline, Iran Cuts All Communication With US: Report
[+14] u/mardigrasmoker: 🎶Pete Hegseth is a fuckin douche
Pete Hegseth is a fuckin douche🎶
[+14] u/Ok-Quote7365: US: Kill entire civilization. Your suffering ends tonight
Iran: Who the fuk are you?
[+14] u/Key-Jaguar7630: AAPL declares inability to compete with Trump Phone
[+14] u/No-Put2311: Calls cause if he follows through with this money suddenly becomes of no consequence
[+13] u/Zoji25: When Iran agrees to a deal, the green candle will be immaculate. I'm taking out a loan against my house and putting it all on spy calls. This is literally the only day to do such a thing. Are you man enough?
[+13] u/wyudtix: Two nuclear powers are about to nuke Iran because they say Iran can not be trusted with nuclear weapons!
[+13] u/New_Internet_3965: Hey y’all, atleast trans girls can’t compete in regional sports tournaments!!!! /s
[+13] u/New_Internet_3965: I can’t believe he’s finally forced me to say this but I should have voted for Harris
[+13] u/Datsyuk131313: “Iran cuts off communication with U.S. ahead of 8 p.m. deadline – report”
As if they were even talking to begin with
[+13] u/jpric155: You know there's a secret room full of rich fucks that know exactly what trump is going to do (because they told him to) and are going to make a shitload of money off of whatever happens after hours today.
[+13] u/Traditional_Page_75: CNBC said growing trend away from buying the dip to selling the rip
Sell the rip
Rip
[+13] u/thatsmymayo: Turns out Biden was a pretty good president who'd have thought. Much more chill days
[+13] u/TheRealJohnOptions: Trump: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
The Iranian Protestors were supposed to save: “What did he mean by that?”
[+13] u/offgramercy: # WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE MF
[+13] u/Gnargoyle420: !banbet spy 420.69 2d
[+12] u/Prestigious_Ad3896: mangos retardation is that he believes power is the only form of leverage... like just cuz he literally could flatten all of iran he thinks he has the ultimate card and iran has to bend the knee because of it
[+12] u/saw-it: Tsla -3%, aapl -4%, meta -1%, msft -1%, spy "I'm good here"
[+12] u/ThermalChaser: Market is overlooking all the money we're going to take in from tolls on the strait of murica
[+12] u/ArkAngelEV: Breaking News: Artemis II has detected multiple thermonuclear explosions on Earth’s surface, concentrated in the Middle East.
SPY + 1,337%
[+12] u/FinishWarm1746: It’s legitimately over. Rip spy bull run
[+12] u/PeachScary413: > war escalating
> oil prices not coming down in months/years
> nukes get mentioned
SPY: best I can do is -1%
[+12] u/Oldschoolhype2: I WILL END IRAN CIVILIZATION! *SPY -0.9%*
[+12] u/ProudRaccoon4653: I'm guessing Trump will declare a ceasefire today which Iran will refuse. Tomorrow Trump will forget he declared the ceasefire and set another arbitrary deadline for Iran to surrender before he super mega annihilates them.
[+11] u/dabblesest: If you give an imbecile a calculator, don’t be fucking surprised if he tries to turn the tv on with it.
This is an analogy. Thank you for your attention to this matter
[+11] u/Williamnguyen62838: BREAKING NEWS: THE DEAL IS OFFICIALLY HERE AND THE STRAIT IS OPEN WIDELY AGAIN
[+11] u/plzplzplztendies: #BUL IN SHAMBLE JUST AS PREDICTED
[+11] u/Stack_Johnson: 85% of the sub is praying the TACO comes before Robinhood closes out our 0DTE calls
[+11] u/CafeClimbOtis: The impending dump will be like no dump you've ever seen before
[+11] u/Samjabr: Meh. 100% in cash now.
This is pure fkery - don't bother
[+11] u/Moepenmoes: Do i still have to work tomorrow?
[+11] u/Warm-Profit-775: We have a deal, we don’t have a deal, we have a plan for a deal, a whole civilization will be killed tonight
[+11] u/aniote: If it's nuclear war tonight just know that this community is the most regarded I have found on the internet and that for fleeting moments I experienced a true sense of belonging
[+11] u/Extension-Change-441: if the world ends we'd have a great movie script with the artemis astronauts still in space
[+11] u/jpwhat: He’s going to 🌮 tonight right? I mean there’s no way he’s not chickening out.
[+10] u/ai___________: Beer and cigarettes ready for tonight
[+10] u/orangeyougladiator: The market not reacting to the non sanitized news only further deepens my belief that the government owns about 50% of it in secret
[+10] u/Happy-Philosophy9211: In case any of you don't think it's TACO Tuesday
Here’s a breakdown of his previous shifting threats, including ultimatums with different deadlines:
* **March 21**: Trump issues 48-hour ultimatum for Iran to open Strait of Hormuz or face US attacks on power plants.
* **March 23**: Trump postpones his deadline for five days, citing progress in purported negotiations with Tehran.
* **March 26**: Trump issues new 10-day deadline, set to expire at 8pm on April 6 (00:00 GMT on April 7).
* **April 4**: Trump says Iran has 48 hours to make a deal, reiterating the April 6 deadline.
* **April 5**: Trump appears to push the [deadline back another day](https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2026/4/5/trump-threatens-hell-for-iran-over-hormuz-strait-as-deadline-approaches) to the evening of April 7, saying that Iran “won’t have any power plants … \[or\] bridges standing” if its leaders “don’t do something” by then.
* Later on April 5, Trump delivers what appears to be a new precise deadline, writing on social media: “Tuesday, 8:00 P.M. Eastern Time!”
* **April 6**: Trump tells reporters his latest deadline is final and that he is “highly unlikely” to postpone it. He says Iran can be “taken out” in “one night”.
* **April 7**: Trump escalates rhetoric to new levels, saying “a whole civilisation will die tonight” in a post published some 12 hours before his deadline.
[+10] u/ModeForJoe: There are decades when nothing happens, and weeks where decades (worth of portfolio losses) happen. Not thrilled about this week, tbh.
[+10] u/Warm_Implement3088: I think it's funny how in the midst of all of this analysts are like "THIS COMPANY IS PROJECTED FOR $$1000 BECAUSE AI GOOGLE DEAL, NO WAR, ONLY AI AIAIAIAIAAIAIAIAIAIA"
[+10] u/IlinistRainbow6: i just did my taxes and have to pay 15k in capital gains tax, my fucking port value is 30k
[+10] u/ChampagnePapi-: Just want to witness the fabled circuit breaker
[+10] u/KnewYouWereFakin: Someone bought the whole market for 30 secs
[+10] u/JakeColorCarton: Iran suspended all diplomatic communications
[+10] u/aaapod: are we about to fucking nuke iran what the fuck
[+10] u/42thefloor2011: 117 a barrel and retards still bUyInG tHe dIp
[+10] u/Gweeds95: Last chance to get out Bols
[+10] u/Put_Er_There_Sport: This is the MMs saying not to believe the fear in mango blowing up an entire country, but also theyre probably scared as fuck too hence the -1% earlier.
This is so fucked
[+10] u/QuarkTheFerengi: cost damn near 20$ to fill up my motorcycle. its only a 3.5 gallon tank. fuck this president
[+10] u/svpa3991: Just hedged tomorrow by filling my tank up today 😎
[+10] u/Ok_Wealth_3433: Something knows someone
[+9] u/DiverOk9454: I checked Google maps and iran is still there.
[+9] u/gloomyglooom: Happy Bridge and Power Plant Day for those who celebrate
[+9] u/WhiteCrocsGuy: I’ve been a bear these past few weeks but it’s actually really sad seeing what’s going on.
Money you can make back but people you can’t.
[+9] u/Cavsfan2332: Trump has tweeted himself to the level of a Furby that gets lost in your childhood home's basement, and lets out a muffled sound every few months just to let everyone know that the battery still has some juice.
[+9] u/Key-Jaguar7630: Does Apple manufacture in Iran? Wtf is this
[+9] u/NoodHigga69: Gonna have to stop rolling coal on cyclists to save on gas now.
[+9] u/lessoninprogress: HOW IS SPY NOT IN THE GROUND RN
[+9] u/Material_Formal3679: BREAKING
“White House senior officials close to the president have been quoted saying ‘the president is on his final season Eren Yeager shit now.’”
[+9] u/FatFluffyFish: Trump is still not TACOing, man's really getting ready to erase an entire civilization
[+9] u/Whatevs56: He’s good for markets guys.
[+9] u/Jazari1: https://preview.redd.it/6p6fl675estg1.png?width=562&format=png&auto=webp&s=4203d195ec2db5eea4acf181b2d390825c3c4111
[+9] u/darth_scion: Maybe the threat of the end of the world was not a buy signal as I thought
[+9] u/NomzStorM: Incredibly obvious TACO tonight
[+9] u/jiggolo420: The day is tomorrow.. the war is no closer to being over. Oil is 120. But we're pumping 3% because nukes weren't used.
[+9] u/AgitatedJump8459: Fuck this market. Just crash already so i can buy cheap amd shares
[+9] u/Crackbot420-69: “Iran has cut off direct communications with the U.S.” - WSJ… wait hasn’t Iran repeatedly refuted statements that they have been communicating directly with the US.
[+9] u/RisingToMediocrity: I’ve been making money but I still want out of the market. I have no clue where it’s going and it pisses me off.
[+9] u/Wise_Ticket_5093: made a solid $16.98 today
[+8] u/thealex7r: Saw 658 before trading session.
Saw 652 hour in.
What a movie
[+8] u/SadWimp: Imagine how wealthy 🥭 family and friends will become after war
[+8] u/Yasqweenn: Feeling cute, might end a civilization tonight. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION ON THIS MATTER. -🥭
[+8] u/LURKER21D: market losses cause taco, but the market won't drop cause they think he'll taco, so we get no taco? that about sum up how fucking dumb this shit it? the leader of the "free world" is talking about glassing 100M people while oil is 115. ffs.
[+8] u/CasinoAnd69Manager: Tomorrow is green Day as there will be no bridges so no cars running and no factories running in Iran as no electricity so no pollution. Green peace achievement. Call Theta Greta
[+8] u/alexbananas: President Trump: “Peace talks with Irak have been going well… oh shit it’s Iran?”
[+8] u/sallyrideee: up a grand on puts. we all may die tonight, but at least i have unrealized gains.
[+8] u/IlinistRainbow6: i blew up my portfolio man
[+8] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: I hadn’t played options for 4days and still managed to buy puts at the bottom. This has got to be a record
[+8] u/bhaaaaaaa: Looks like Israel started bridge day early
[+8] u/FuckElonMuskkk: A whole civilization will die tonight!
A whole civilization of bulls.
[+8] u/Ecomonist: The statement was redacted! The whole quote is 'An entire civilization will die tonight (from embarrassment).' ...
[+8] u/YutaYutaO: sell everything, you need to stay liquid
[+8] u/The_Albertino: This thing is gonna selloff hard end of day
[+8] u/DonCenote: All this taco and mango talk is making me hungry.
[+8] u/aaapod: please just let him die man jesus fuck
[+8] u/Lurk_Maximus: Doulingo just added stone age language to their curriculum
[+8] u/Domefieldadvantage: The fact it’s only down 1% is a miracle tbh
[+8] u/HolyBubbiDiver: Rubio saying there will be news about Iran later today.
Barron just needs to make his moves before they release them
[+8] u/extrabigbrain: AI was suppose to make work easier - but now you’ll just procrastinate prompting it lol
[+8] u/Illimited_Esoterica: Can't tell if Big Orange having a Discord mod meltdown on Twitter and talking about committing a genocide is bullish or not. Help
[+7] u/ZealousidealSector19: Volume is low. Like everyone is waiting for something to happen
[+7] u/WendyDumpsterFire: Market is rigged as fuck
[+7] u/pixi88: Volume is still low.
[+7] u/leeuwvanvlaanderen: Still wild that markets dropped harder on liberation day than during a war that’s threatening a global inflationary crisis on par with what we saw in 2022
[+7] u/Vimes76: Exited my shorts at first opportunity, don't trust the algos not to grind this up regardless. As regarded as it is.
[+7] u/NatasEvoli: Don't worry bulls, tomorrow we'll be PUMPING again. I'm talking like +0.28%
[+7] u/Waverun: Can’t wait for the last minute deal today and the new last minute deal tomorrow.
[+7] u/Nightdocks: Insane that I can’t assess nuclear threats are bullish because it would mean the end of the war or bearish because, well, you know
[+7] u/ChinCheckUrFartBox: Everything red but intel which is up 1.6%
[+7] u/_lueless: Humans really haven't evolved eh
[+7] u/ClayMost: Dump your calls while you can
[+7] u/AnotherDegenerateFK: I might’ve downgraded AAPL last night..
[+7] u/gul_bil: Wow, he really did it; eggs/dozen -17.84%
[+7] u/Chancey004: *IRAN HAS STOPPED NEGOTIATIONS WITH US: NYT
*IRAN TOLD PAKISTAN IT WON'T CONTINUE CEASEFIRE TALKS: NYT
Oh brother
[+7] u/Thebaxxxx: There was a rug under me i swear 🤔
[+7] u/CH-LOL: why would biden do this
[+7] u/kojima_you_genius: I really think he’s not bluffing this time and is gonna level the place to set an example for his further conquest of the holy land, Greenland
[+7] u/YachtOrNothing: Commence the drilling please
[+7] u/Get_dat_money: Guys... He set his dead line literally on Tuesday.
It's the most obvious signal to his pals.
[+6] u/Soft-Usual-9909: Lmao, imagine declaring war while with the Easter bunny
[+6] u/SSMST: Are there enough open roles at Wendy’s to keep us all employed for the next decade?
[+6] u/Concept-Plastic: That VOLUME
HOLYYYY
[+6] u/RegardedDegen: I'll save the market guys. Just bought some puts. Get ready for it to rip.
[+6] u/Rosella2562: “I don’t want to talk about private credit right now” - Breath of fresh air to hear this, I’ve been waiting for CNBC anchors to say it for weeks now 😅👏🏻
[+6] u/Initial_Ad_9250: Allah what are you doing mayne, I thought you could save my port or something. Switched teams and stuff.
[+6] u/Express_Track1571: Holy fuck these premiums are crazy
[+6] u/pain474: No point in trying to trade the current market, it's purely random at this point. All news come after market close and market open is just chop to fuck option holders. Good luck.
[+6] u/lithe_silhouette: Turns out puts before nukes is not free money after all
[+6] u/Issa_vibe74: Suck on that bulls, we getting a red flat day
[+5] u/sharkysharkman123: circuit breaker coming. Praise be to Allah
[+5] u/AllCapNoBrake: Some of you already sent your tax bill to the IRS and it shows.
[+5] u/AllCapNoBrake: A lot of you are going to try and trade in digital stock certificates (that won't load) for food and water starting tomorrow, and it shows.
[+5] u/Tay_Tay86: Stand ready for bears arrival, salmon
[+44] u/Primary-Abies9041: Tonight is not the night but in the decades of the future when the nuclear apocalypse finally happens, the last comment on the daily discussion thread will be someone calling the ICBM alert a bear trap
[+27] u/DarkR124: “A whole civilization will die tonight”
That’s insane. Even for him.
[+24] u/Ok-Analysis4121: Jfc this manipulation is insane. Iran is not negotiating, there will be no ceasefire.
[+24] u/Thin_Response_2689: Watch him make up some bs like I wanted to but congress wont let me
[+24] u/Bombad443: Speak loudly and carry a small dick
[+23] u/Losemoniez: A whole civilization die bc he raped a 13 year old and can’t catch up to his own distraction tactics
[+23] u/ConstantAd1: >Iran talks show glimmer of progress as deadline looms - Axios.
Here's the Axios fake pump
[+23] u/bb483: Life of a bear : +10%, +30%, +50%, +25%, + 7%, -12%, -40% , -70%
[+22] u/FunInteraction9796: i miss joe biden bro
[+20] u/Ornery-Appeal-7862: Regardless of what Trump does, the Strait is staying closed
[+19] u/495N: Lmao the TACO theory is spot on:
> PRESIDENT TRUMP SAID THAT THE STRIKES ON IRAN THAT HE PROMISED WOULD BEGIN AT 8:00 P.M. TUESDAY ARE “HAPPENING,” BUT CAUTIONED THAT THINGS “COULD CHANGE.” - ABC NEWS
[+18] u/tri-pug: though we may be committing some light genocide tonight, remember that all clouds have a silver lining. Except for mushroom clouds. Those have a lining of cesium-137 and strontium-90.
[+18] u/nick8852: “Think about the children!” - Jeffry Epstein
[+18] u/angrybubblez: Iran says we ain’t talking to yall anymore….. market pumps lmao
[+18] u/WSB-mods-are-: There are leaked rumors about the McRib making a mid-season come back. This would be the bear extinction-level event.
[+17] u/Weak_Emu3659: "Y'all gonna die"
\+3%
[+17] u/Brief_Challenge_1163: So to be clear
Trump is threatening Genocide
Israel is considering nukes
Iran is threatening attacks "outside their region" (global)
and the market is like, yeah, maybe we will drop a percent ...maybe not.
???
[+17] u/TrumpsCummyOnahole: >US urges all citizens in Bahrain to shelter in place
>Iran cuts all diplomatic channels with US
Market: it's time to pump
[+16] u/LakeShowForLife24: Whole market is just in waiting mode
[+16] u/404MoralsNotFound: Due to poor weather, we are regrettably postponing the end of your civilization - 🥭, probably.
[+16] u/Devastaytah: Show me a fuckin -3% day for once
[+16] u/sailortyx56: Axios article about a fake "progress" dropped just in time to pump the market.
Lol.
[+15] u/Imgoin2brich: Personally enjoying the lying scam master Elon losing his wealth as Tesla melts
Going way lower
Love it lol
[+15] u/Puzzleheaded-Use1533: TDUMP will probably strike tonight but not on an annihilation level, just enough to send a message. Then he’ll threaten more force with another deadline later on
[+15] u/Ok_Material3073: I'm tired of hanging on to every word of a deranged old maniac.
[+15] u/OkRecommendation1040: How does this shit never go down seriously
[+15] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: Los Angeles reduced to dust by 9.4 earthquake, SPY up 0.3% on speculation of new housing boom potential
[+14] u/Happy-n-Healthy: The Astronauts on the Artemis have decided to stay in space a while longer
[+14] u/Left-Signature-5250: Why do I even do this to myself? Sitting in front of thsi shit 4-6 hours after my day job, looking at charts and entering positions that I hold when they are green and then sell them when they turn on me once again.
I must really be retarded.
So far it cost me only $3500. Fuuuuuuu
[+14] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: Black Death kills 197,000,000 Americans, SPY up 0.3% on biotech speculation
[+13] u/Economisty: The clock strikes midnight. People rush to spend the last few minutes with their loved ones. Humanity as we know it will end. One Reddit Mod stays back to ban anyone mentioning REDACTED.
[+13] u/Apple2o: An entire civilization will get its deadline extended tonight
[+13] u/SlfImpr: Lol WW3 tonight and market is like... meh, whatever!
[+13] u/ArchegosCapitalCEO: He means that in 12 hours he's going to announce that we're going to bomb iran's power plants in two weeks. This is his final warning for real this time, no takebacks
[+13] u/1M-to-Zero: So basically Trump said he will bomb them in 8hrs. 8pm Eastern time
then Iran asked him to do it early between 1 and 2pm lmao
[+13] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: The sun disappears from the sky and plunges the solar system into eternal darkness, SPY up 0.3%
[+12] u/Capable_Pack3656: Folks, what the Artemis II astronauts did was incredible. Really incredible. They went to the dark side of the moon - very dangerous, very spooky stuff - and they found alien life. Bad aliens. Nasty aliens. Total disaster.
But our astronauts? Brave. Tough. Absolute heroes. They didn’t panic, they didn’t back down -they took care of it. They wiped them out. And they made the moon safe again.
So we salute them. Great Americans. Strong Americans. Heroes, every one of them. Nobody’s ever seen anything like it.
[+12] u/demonhunterking: Is not up to anyone decide taco. Iran have to play his part too
[+12] u/sonianevermindX: Threating gen0cide and we’re still barely down holy
[+12] u/TheLelouchLamperouge: Mango realizing the cards he possesses are actually the launch codes
[+12] u/Witty-Doughnut-3777: press sell -> goes up
Press buy -> goes down
press nothing -> "i WiLL eXtend NeGOtiations"
[+12] u/Grey-59throwaway: Deleting a civilization.. bullish?
[+12] u/bb483: this is a in & out market , can’t hold positions longer than 20 mins
[+12] u/StarvingOprah: Can't wait for Iran earnings tonight
[+12] u/Fine_Specialists: This green won’t hold up the vix is too high.
[+12] u/isitdonethen: if stocks decided to have a -3% day, it would actualyl stop trump from doing something incredibly fucking stupid
[+11] u/Zeppu: And I still don't even know why Iran is being attacked
[+11] u/Spicyboi981: Sitting in commute traffic. Oh wait, it’s just the gas line at Costco spilling onto the street
[+11] u/BeepBoopDep: LMAO 0DTE puts MELTING 😂
[+11] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: Confederacy attempts second secession, SPY up 0.3% on hopes of new trade partnership
[+11] u/092Casey: I get my breaking news from WSB regards 🤌
[+11] u/FunInteraction9796: bulls celebrating being down 0.8% ✌🏻✌🏻✌🏻
[+11] u/hellweek334: Theoretically if I bought out the money spy calls and Iran opens the straight what are the chances it goes itm 😂
[+11] u/GiveMeNews: B-52 bombers armed to the teeth seen flying over UK.
https://reddit.com/gallery/1sexazy
[+11] u/ajr901: Wait so... there's no news other than Iran saying they have cut off all diplomatic ties, and yet oil is down and SPY/QQQ are up?? I must be missing something.
[+11] u/FunInteraction9796: how is spy not down more lmao
[+11] u/Alone_Education_2530: “Will Trump praise Allah again by April 15?” a real thing on Polymarket
[+10] u/bb483: Bers hold puts like they’re shares & not options, gotta sell soon as green
[+10] u/dUjOUR88: hunting/gathering doesn't sound so bad....how hard could it be really
[+10] u/Alone_Education_2530: The 8pm deadline is for you to all go completely cash by the way. He gave you a time and a date. If your port ends up getting nuked it’s on you.
[+10] u/Majestic-Bass6772: OBLITERATION DAYYYYY
[+10] u/Newlife_40: People need to stop attributing pumps and dumps to any tangible news. At this point everything is about someone else trying to get your money. That’s it.
[+10] u/bigchodeenergyy: Damn dude what happened to 🍎😂
[+10] u/Sweaty_Platypus69: Saudi becoming/learning to speak Kremlin messages.
"Fallen Debris" on our oil infrastructure when the vide shows clearly a drone/missles hitting it directly.
What's next? Our oil assets intercepted succesfully the projectiles??
[+10] u/Ok-Piano8789: the real war crimes are being done by axios
[+10] u/Economisty: \*\*\*Two men in Tehran watching the first mushroom cloud form\*\*\*
"Look on the bright side Ali, at least my puts will print tomorrow"
[+10] u/A10cc: Was that a pump for ants? Shit already got smacked the fuck down.
[+10] u/johns2289: Lmao joe on cnbc recommending 0dte’s we are soooooooooo fucked
[+10] u/mr_stupid_face: Thank you mayo eating sister lovers for getting us into this shit situation
[+10] u/daedalus_dance: Apply lube to both sides so that you enjoy whichever way you get fucked today.
[+9] u/Sweaty_Platypus69: Just so you know, 🥭 can easily do a price cap on domestic Oil and deny exports. (We are self sufficient on oil domestically)
The world gets fucked at $145 Brent Oil but WTI can hover around $120.
He may even consider this without any tacoing.
The oil companies will scream quietly but wont dare to challenge.
[+9] u/UsernameTaken_123: They should release the files to distract from this war
[+9] u/Molten-Helldiver: I think everyone today has been in shambles at least once 😂
[+9] u/diefy7321: Eyeran: we haven’t been talking with the US
Also eyeran: we have now stopped talking with the US
LMAO 🤌
[+9] u/-TiV: Bulls fried again lmao
[+9] u/General-Elk-6537: Today's rally is brought to you by nothing. Absolutely just feelings
[+9] u/Frosty-Pea-4577: Waited a long weekend for 2 days of no volume fml
[+9] u/Happy-n-Healthy: I think it's time for Dennis Rodman to call the Prez
[+9] u/Forward-Ad5608: seriously does anyone know the cause of that huge spike, I can't find any news? If no news that feels like crazy insider trading
[+8] u/Alone_Education_2530: 🥭 was just on Fox and doubled down on 8 PM EST tonight
[+8] u/Jonbuh: This is a fking joke.
[+8] u/Metacog_Drivel: Some chud ass mod banned me for talking shit about his orange savior and I contested and won. Get fuuuucked. wsb still fucking ass tho
[+8] u/moviekid214: Trump: “IM ENDING THE WORLD IM ENDING THE WORLD IM ENDING THE WORLD”
Obviously we are going to be completely fine because taco
[+8] u/Ridiculous_Society: Today appears to me as a lower high, lower low after breaking down from the 200 DMA. This could easily drop 5-7% the rest of the week if he doesn't TACO
[+8] u/big_chestnut: you get $1 trillion but no longer allowed to buy puts or go short
[+8] u/NeedToMakeMoneyz: A whole civilization might die tonight and you guys are asking for this shit to go up? FUCK YOU
[+7] u/modder9: Profit is profit. Lose that type of thinking or you will fomo into ass trades and blow up your port
[+7] u/Fast-Steak-7730: Only V bulls going to get is their cortisol
[+7] u/Kind_Brush5556: Pls drill below 630 some time in the comming week. I swear I'll buy the dip this time.
[+7] u/sconnie64: What a day to be gay
[+7] u/broke_person: We are only down 1% for possibility of destroying a civilization. Bears r fked
[+6] u/jostradumass: I think this mid session pump is to make it so the late day dump doesn’t seem as bad. It won’t hold. 640 eod.
[+31] u/Small-Maintenance-65: This has got to be the dumbest market response in ages
[+30] u/Tricky_Let2806: It’s actually insane how Israel destroyed literally everything in Gaza..
[+28] u/fightoraccept: lsraeli Channel 13 launches live countdown for President Trump's deadline on Iran. That's crazy lol
[+26] u/bearhunter429: #Americans are the dumbest MFers on earth LMAO🤌
[+24] u/trumpdiego: ##> a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again
##> SPY -.3%
[+20] u/SearchUsual5193: Such a boring market! Just fall -4% atleast ffs, I wanna feel something!
[+19] u/pineapplekiwipen: # BREAKING: AXIOS TO START PUBLISHING CALL STRIKES TO BUY INSTEAD OF HEADLINES
[+19] u/ImAnonymous135: At this point a extinction level event would pump the Dow to 100k
[+18] u/enlightenedfarmboy: I always figured if I ever got fucked by a 79 year old man it would've happened at church when I was a 7 year old boy not when I was 33 trying to trade equity markets
[+18] u/isolated-cat: IRAN-US TALKS SHOW PROGRESS IN PAST 24 HOURS: AXIOS
this has to be satire right?
[+18] u/Successful_Doubt8632: They forced the general who was against ground attacks to retire. They have been bombing bridges and railways to Isfahan and Kashan the last few days. Bombed Kharg Island today. I'm betting he thinks they can go swipe their uranium and get out real quick. Just a little journey. In and out, 5 minutes tops.
[+18] u/DrElkSnout: There is simply no reality that I could have pictured where the Pres can post:
"A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again...."
And we DON'T immediately limit down? What fucking portal did we all go through where reality is this version of whatever in the fuck is going on?
How in the fuck are the markets not reacting to this?
Literally how?
[+18] u/Boheed: this market will be studied for generations
[+17] u/robotpoet: Most powerful president on earth threatens to drop a nuke in a few hours: neutral day for SPY
[+17] u/Far-Requirement9180: The problem with options is that even if you’re right in the direction, timing is everything and you can still get fuk lol
[+17] u/Adventurous-Iron251: I swear to god this is the gayest market ever
[+17] u/Wild_Boy_: Am I crazy thinking this is pure manipulation
[+16] u/Lapidated_Llama: Mother fucking is threatening to kill a civilization tonight and we’re hardly red.
[+16] u/Ok_Importance9886: I feel like there are no talks and the US is just talking to itself. they have no idea what to do on the deadline ....
[+16] u/probablyuntrue: Hold on guys…I’m starting to think this guy doesn’t know what he’s doing
[+16] u/AndThisGuyPeedOnIt: The dumbest fucking guy you know: shitting his pants, rambling incoherently
The Media: "he's just playing 5D chess, he's pretending to not have a plan, it's all playing out exactly as predicted"
[+15] u/bigboybigbat: I am actually at my wit's end. How does it just always pump? Even if the news was positive which it isn't, there has been so much physical and financial damage done. Real value has been lost and we just pump.
[+15] u/United-Hearing-8286: All these articles are fake as fuck nobody knows what the emperor will do until 8 pm est
[+15] u/probablyuntrue: Please bro one more bombing run bro it’ll solve everything bro trust me bro we almost won bro I’m so sure bro
[+14] u/w33dw1zard420: Absolutely abominable work today by the institutions
[+14] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: How did our country slump down to this level of moral degradation and complete ambivalence about fellow human beings
[+14] u/Stunning-Dig-8916: Our entire life savings are dependent on a man wearing the wrong shade of makeup.
[+14] u/ManBearPig_1983: GIVE ME THE FUCKING OIL YOU CRAZY FUCKING BASTARD! PRAISE BE TO ALLAH!
[+14] u/ayashifx55: admit it, SPY doesn't deserve to be over 600 after all this shit show , bad economy , bad US dollars , the war causing more inflations cause low-middle income people will suffer soon. Can't wait for powell to say fck you guys, im retiring, no interest cuts cause fck everyone.
[+14] u/Awake_Beast616: Wednesday April 2 2025 also had a bunch of people saying "there's no way Trump would actually go through with it" only for him to drop global tariffs that same night
[+13] u/PushAble2463: My gf can orgasm from titty play alone. Anything is possible in today’s market.
[+13] u/Invisible_Pony: Strait opens: SPY up 0.5%.
Strait nuked: SPY up 0.499%
[+13] u/briballdo: Does anyone have a number I can call to report blatant market manipulation?
[+13] u/Significant_Poetry53: “But it’s not a war” 👆🤓
[+13] u/IntroductionOwn9781: I think I will head to Polymarket and bet on some crazy shit, that still makes more sense than this market.
[+13] u/bronfmanhigh: Stock and oil prices have reversed some of their earlier moves after Axios published a report saying there was a “glimmer” of progress in negotations between the United States and Iran. The reported cited U.S. and Israeli officials, along with two other unnamed sources.
thats the pump guys. a glimmer
[+13] u/dreamer_Neet: BREAKING- new book coming soon by President Trump
ART OF ZERO DEAL
[+12] u/Me-Regarded: Going to get tons of snacks and cold beer for the festivities tonight. On the comfort of my premium couch stuffing my face while millions go without power, food and livelyhoods, possibly vaporized... Feels like the American way. What do you want from me??? 🤷
[+12] u/GuyFaulks77: It’s bullshit that anything 🥭 says that’s negative doesn’t tank the market, but anything he says even remotely positive pumps the market wildly
[+12] u/grubernack276: Insert benaffleckcigarette.jpg
[+12] u/clubdirthill: BREAKING AXIOS: EASTER BUNNY REAL, WILL BE DELIVERING CANDY. BUNNY IS NOT YOUR PARENTS.
[+12] u/SylphCo93: If the market goes green because TACO is priced in, that gives Trump a bit more comfort to go aggro against Iran, which causes more damage and instability. But if the market acted even halfway more rationally and tanked ala liberation day, the pressure would build for an actual TACO. Ironically bols might be fueling their own demise.
[+12] u/w33dw1zard420: Head shoulders knees and toes pattern forming
[+12] u/The_Juice_Gourd: Years ago a gorilla told me WW3 would start today. A few days later they shot him. RIP Harambe.
[+12] u/Illustrious_Life_418: Think of all the finance bros working in Wall Street now, all that math/finance/business/fundamentals you spent years studying?
Yeah doesn’t matter much anymore. Your 9-5 is now auto-refreshing twitter every 5 minutes and betting on how cranky 🥭feels for the day
[+12] u/No-Paint-5726: Cant short cause axios writes sources say deals progressing and gets away with it by writing (chances of a deal still remains slim) lmao and news outlets take the headline deals progressing.
Barak Ravid
[+11] u/MetalEnthusiast83: Report: 6 Billion Dead
Spy -0.36%
[+11] u/Bright-Revolution496: Why does all my money have paw prints on it? Was it bear money before or something?
[+11] u/curlnut3_14: He tweeted fuck and called Joe mentally retarded on tv, I don’t think he gives a flying fuck anymore. Nukes by 8:30. SPY to 640 tomorrow.
[+11] u/bigboyvapesinc: of course the MFs deadline is aftermarket close
[+11] u/ByahhByahh: It's very weird to watch the Attack on Titan finale and then the President says he can end an entire civilization.
[+11] u/soscribbly: Give me a 5% overnight gap down.
[+11] u/SquirtleStomp: Everyone is expecting him to taco and were all retarded so hes not gonna taco, taco Tuesday canceled
[+11] u/ComfortableMoney7090: Liberation Day 2: This time it’s Biblical
🍿
[+10] u/i-Vison: lol no one really believes him wow
[+10] u/Necessary-Lychee-486: Most rigged market of all time scams again
[+10] u/apurimac777: No one fucking believes him anymore
Literally threatening an oil producer with Armageddon and the markets could give less than two fucks
He's done. The lamest and most demented of lame ducks. 25th his ass.
[+10] u/yutao123: Trumps in the situation room, carriers have gone radio silent. UN resolution has been vetoed. Taco Tuesday has been cancelled
[+10] u/Altruistic-Mammoth: Guys what does Polymarket say about nuking Iran tonight
[+10] u/Maximum-Side-9391: Axios sees a glimmer of hope lol please tell me that wasn't the pump ?
[+10] u/PenaltyDistinct2632: Holy market manipulation batman
[+9] u/yushey__: I might actually become a libtard starting at 8 PM
[+9] u/Altruistic-Mammoth: https://preview.redd.it/nko6xi9wvstg1.png?width=668&format=png&auto=webp&s=b60451f670ec17d9ad787b767fccc1164207cddf
[+9] u/Polysorbate800: Trump tells Fox News he will delay due to negotiations going well lmaooooo
[+9] u/cryptohorn: Axios must be selling puts
[+9] u/tinydisaster: It’s a good day to cash gang and popcorn 🍿🍿
[+9] u/TechniCruller: It’s almost 7:30PM in Iran rn. 8PM US is like 2:30 AM in Iran. If a deal is going to be realized, you’d think it would come in a couple of hours.
[+9] u/UnlimitedSenzuBeans: This shit makes no sense
[+9] u/proret4rd: WTI is higher than Brent. WTF
[+9] u/100xOrBust: Look at how they massacred my boy
[+9] u/fire_alarmist: So overnight puts here go +5000% right?
[+9] u/TimeOnTargetKilo: If I’m making slow steady gains like 200 bucks a day that’s a Win right?
[+8] u/HomeMadeToast: I mean a nuking a foreign adversary basically overrides being a pedophile on the scale of fucked up shit, maybe that’s been the final solution all along
[+8] u/Neither-Still-8841: Nuclear war is on the menu bois, bullish
[+8] u/Sufficient-Aide6805: are you fucking kidding me what the fuck was that
[+8] u/Senior_Professional4: Entire civilisations dying is arguably bullish
[+8] u/Randomname1157: We're going to find out under the next administration that the Treasury bought stocks during the Iran War to hold up the market
[+8] u/Sweaty-Survey-9804: She a ten but she dated the “boots on the ground guy”
[+7] u/yushey__: Believe it or not, calls
[+22] u/brondoplantscraveit: It’s scary how quick this thread is with news while also being extremely naive and uninformed. I guess it shows that knowing something isn’t the same as understanding it.
[+21] u/caliwillbemine: -Trump threatens end of a civilization
-Iran cuts off all communication to call bluff
-Market assumes a taco
Feels like last April but with lasting infrastructure effects.
[+18] u/Jackfitton12: 🥭 threatening nuclear war.
Highest car Loan defaults in US Histroy.
Largest amount of Layoffs in recent history.
Americans dipping into 401k savings just to buy food and gas.
The Middle class disappearing.
The Stock market for some reason 📈 ⬆️
[+17] u/BaronOfIce: I think the day 🥭 actually permanently leaves office SPY +10%
[+17] u/redpillsbluepills: Notice how no one talks about the Epstein files anymore?
[+17] u/Jemmani22: Quite literally on the brink of ww3. 🥭 threatened to kill everyone in a country.
Spy recovers over night and gonna end green.
Is this real life?
[+17] u/Ordinary-Ad2052: Mar 3: "We won the war."
Mar 7: "We defeated Iran."
Mar 9: "We must attack Iran."
Mar 9: "The war is ending almost completely, and very beautifully."
Mar 11: "We must attack Iran."
Mar 12: "We did win, but we haven't won completely yet."
Mar 13: "We won the war."
Mar 14: "Please help us."
Mar 15: "If you don't help us, I will certainly remember it."
Mar 16: "Actually, we don't need any help at all."
Mar 16: "I was just testing to see who's listening to me."
Mar 16: "If NATO doesn't help, they will suffer something very bad."
Mar 17: "We neither need nor want NATO's help."
Mar 17: "I don't need Congressional approval to withdraw from NATO."
Mar 18: "Our allies must cooperate in reopening the Strait of Hormuz."
Mar 19: "US allies need to get a grip - step up and help open the Strait of Hormuz."
Mar 20: "NATO are cowards."
Mar 21: "The Strait of Hormuz must be protected by the countries that use it. We don't use it, we don't need to open it."
Mar 22: "This is the last time. I will give Iran 48 hours. Open the strait"
Mar 22: "Iran is Dead"
Mar 23: "We had very good and productive talks with Iran."
Mar 24: "We’re making progress."
Mar 25: No major quote
Mar 26: "Make a deal, or we’ll just keep blowing them away."
Mar 27: "We don’t have to be there for NATO."
Mar 28: No major quote
Mar 29: Claimed talks were progressing
Mar 30: "Open the Strait of Hormuz immediately, or face devastating consequences."
Mar 31: Claimed a deal was "very close" and that Iran would "do the right thing"
Apr 1: "We’ll see what happens very soon."
Apr 2: Repeated that a deal was likely, while warning of continued strikes if not
Apr 3: "Something big is going to happen."
Apr 4: Said Iran must comply "immediately" or face further consequences
Apr 5: "Open the fuckin' Strait, you crazy bastards, or you'll be living in Hell - JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah."
[+16] u/Skylake1987: The amount of psychos in here celebrating the possibility of nukes is disgusting
[+15] u/E39_CBX: You guys realize there is a 0% chance of anything nuclear right
[+15] u/pussinbuuts: SOMEBODY KNOWS SOMETHING
[+15] u/nyse25: January 2029 cant come soon enough
[+13] u/PinNo6026: Looks like B52s took off an hour ago
https://x.com/i/status/2041563448937525592
[+13] u/pumpkin1986: inverse wsb kinda feeling like puts here strangely
[+13] u/SoloOutdoor: Imagine if youre in the space ship and watch the world go dark
[+13] u/bigbootytrudyyy: You know why they called him sleepy? Because you could sleep soundly at night without worrying about your portfolio or gas prices
[+12] u/SmallCapsOnly: Wow Reddit censorship on other subs is oppressive. Apparently mentioning well documented violent times in history is “threatening violence” in the automods algorithm.
Maybe if Reddit weren’t cheap as fuck and actually paid its mods we wouldn’t have AI banning people for shit it has zero concept of.
All to save about $3.5 million in expenses if mods were paid but they are willing to make the end user experience oppressive and like walking on eggshells.
TLDR; Short Reddit, this place will be an empty bastion of what used to be a place to speak freely.
Rant over.
[+12] u/KaleidoscopeNo7975: It would only be shocking if he followed through with it at this point.
[+12] u/Money-Will-1867: Who is pumping spy? I’m really curious
[+12] u/Helios420A: so despite the fact that we’re still looking at global oil shocks, we’re gonna end up rallying because nukes didnt drop, right?
[+12] u/Perfectly_Splendid89: Iran will need 500 food, 500 stone and 250 gold to advance to feudal age from stone age.
They can increase the speed by typing "aegis"
So it is not bad as much as it sounds.
[+12] u/D1finalboss: Market is red and bols are celebrating 😂
[+12] u/Odd-Block-2998: US passport in 2019: access to 150 countries
US passport in 2026: access to 15 countries
Everyone stucks in tourism within the country. Good for economy. Bullish.
[+12] u/OPs_new_account: B52s taking off in mass from U.K., gives them exactly the flight time to be in Iran by deadline. Get your puts, there is no TACO.
[+11] u/Jupitersd2017: Alright bears I bought calls, you are welcome
[+10] u/Regular_King_4157: I am a ber, but tomorrow is one of those days when I hope my puts expire worthless
[+9] u/MrNewking: Fuck, both my calls and puts are going up...
[+9] u/No-Relationship8261: Desalination plants will have to work extra hard due bear tears after todays legendary TACO.
[+9] u/WonUpH: Both the israel's and the weird strain of christian leaders they have in america look too serious about their apocalyptic beliefs and the return of their messiah for me to bet real money on easter taco ngl
[+9] u/clavitopaz: This mf isn’t gonna bomb anyone tonight, I’m gonna go eat tacos
[+9] u/kellyk311: Even if the world as we once knew it ends later today, I just want to make it perfectly clear that I will still never like jazz music.
[+9] u/LostMyMag: Some algo just mis-interpreted the news, some intern is about to enjoy a nice dinner party on an island.
[+9] u/Sharp_Mistake_3119: Hey guys, I was told to come here to buy gamestop and amc?
[+9] u/SPY_0DTE: A whole species of ungulates will die tonight, never to be brought back again. I don’t want that to happen, but it probably will. However, now that we have Complete and Total Market Control, where different, smarter, and less radicalized minds prevail, maybe something revolutionarily wonderful can happen, WHO KNOWS? We will find out tonight, one of the most important moments in the long and complex history of the SPY. 23 years of gains, happiness, and wealth, will finally end. God Bless the Great Bears of SPY!
[+8] u/DonaldJGromp: President of the United States essentially says he wants to commit to genocide and send the entire world in turmoil and economic ruin.
SPY: best I can do is -.5%
This shit is so fake lmao
[+8] u/spky_: Donnie got left on read lmao
[+8] u/goldsoundzz: You know what? I’m starting to think this whole thing wasn’t such a great idea
[+8] u/Dewton: The funniest thing possible would be the worlds largest taco into a selloff tomorrow lmao
[+7] u/Nice_Chemical377: tacos getting expensive
[+7] u/gen_x_og_0DTE: spy moving up but kindof like it's stuck in wet sand. Sand that is wet. Some of the wettest sand in the history of wet sand. The wettest sand that anyone has ever seen. Sand so wet that nobody can believe it.
[+6] u/No-Relationship8261: TACO any minute now, right guys? RIGHT?
[+23] u/Ok-Mango-5228: No matter what happens, the winner of today’s markets will say the following tomorrow: “it was so obvious, <bulls/bears> must love losing money”
[+18] u/tristis_veritas: Physical oil apparently at $150 now.
Man hyperinflation and our dollars becoming worthless is going to be so much fun.
[+18] u/baadllama_ghost: next time somebody says "the market is pricing in" or "the market is forward looking"
point them to this day
[+18] u/jeezuspieces: What if Iran strikes a data center that hosts Robinhood services and you can't get out of your trades
[+18] u/eje0100: Feb 28: "We are beginning a decisive operation." "This will be quick."
Mar 3: "We won the war."
Mar 7: "We defeated Iran."
Mar 9: "We must attack Iran." "The war is ending almost completely, and very beautifully."
Mar 12: "We did win, but we haven't won completely yet."
Mar 13: "I don't like to say this, but we've won the war, this war has been won."
Mar 14: "Please help us."
Mar 15: "If you don't help us, I will certainly remember it."
Mar 16: "Actually, we don't need any help at all. I was just testing allies."
Mar 17: "We neither need nor want NATO's help."
Mar 18: "Our allies must cooperate in reopening the Strait of Hormuz."
Mar 19: "US allies need to get a grip - step up and help open the Strait of Hormuz"
Mar 20: "NATO are cowards." "We may start winding this down."
Mar 21: "We don't use it, we don't need to open it."
Mar 22: "This is the last time. I will give Iran 48 hours." "Iran is Dead"
Mar 23: "We are giving them more time."
Mar 24: "The war is nearing its end."
Mar 25: "We are still negotiating."
Mar 26: "Iran is begging for peace." "They gave us a gift."
Mar 27: "Me and the Ayatollah will together run the strait of hormus" Mar 28: "We are very close to a deal." "Nothing is agreed yet."
Mar 29: "Iran has undergone Regime change." "They're all dead, other than one who may have a little life left in him."
Mar 30: "We will blowup and obliterate oil & electric plants in Iran & occupy Kharg island."
Mar 31: "Willing to end the war without reopening Hormuz." "Allies should go get their own oil—we're not there for them anymore."
Apr 1: "NATO is a paper tiger, leaving it is beyond reconsideration."
Apr 2: "We will halt weapons supplies to Ukraine unless NATO join us to secure the Strait of Hormuz."
Apr 3: "We could take the oil and make a fortune." "Allies should build some delayed courage and go to the Strait and just take it."
Apr 4: "Hell will reign down on them." "The Ayatollah is seeking a ceasefire - not me."
Apr 5: "Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day." "Open the Fuckin' Strait, you crazy bastards, or you'll be living in Hell—JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah."
Apr 7: "A whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again."
[+18] u/VeryMercurial: Lmao so algos read a “pretty please” request and pumped 🤣🤣 holy shit this market really is looking for anything positive just so it doesn’t go down
[+16] u/would-rather-read: he literally can’t taco. If he backs off on this threat iran knows they have him by the balls and they continue to crash the global economy. He never should have started this war
[+16] u/somewhere_cool: Reminder, you can be right about what happens tonight and still get fucked by the market
[+16] u/flashbangkill: the last time Vix was this high today, spx was 50 points lower
[+15] u/feti_wap: And the Chinese just over there smiling, minding their own business, building EVs and shit...
[+15] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: damn this is going to be like 1929, 2001 dot com bust and 2008 crash combined
[+15] u/TestingLifeThrow1z: It’s gonna be so anticlimactic.
[+15] u/miata_only: I just wanted to tell you guys good luck. We're all counting on you.
[+14] u/SmoothOperator423: I just started reading Art of the Deal and I don’t think I hit the Blow up the bridges and power plants part
[+14] u/CigInside: Iran is bad . One day they may preemptively strike a nation with missles and kill their leader. I could see them even using the pretense of negotiations to accomplish this
[+14] u/Entinot444: am I the only one that feels a very bad feeling this time like for the world as a whole. regardless of a 🌮 or not it's a level of insanity I don't really see the US fully recovering from.
[+14] u/NotAFridge: those epstein files must be crazy
[+14] u/ViridianEight: I cant do it man I cant be a bear.
President of the United States talks about annihilating entire civilizations while oil skyrockets and SPY just holds tight and I end up staring at a chart for pennies, and if some bullshit headline happens to pop up suddenly i’ve been liquidated.
Lifestyle not for me I just dont have the balls
[+14] u/No_Tough_2065: Drill team six reporting in 🫡
[+14] u/Pikachumon25: SPY is moving because of Pakistan news? Strange times
[+14] u/kantargi: BREAKING: Pakistan PM Sharif requests Trump to extend Iran deadline for two weeks.
[+14] u/smellyfingernail: A whole portfolio will die tonight
[+13] u/ajibtunes: **BREAKING : United States Air Force (USAF) B-52s are departing RAF Fairford taking off fully loaded. ~7 hour combat flight time to Iran puts them in striking range by 8 pm UTC**
[+13] u/ChampionshipOdd947: It's not hard for me to take profit, it's hard for me to get profit
[+12] u/Practical_Corner8839: A whole portfolio will die tonight never to be brought back again
[+12] u/Optimal-Midnight4295: STOP THE FUCKIN COUNT YOU CRAZY BASTARDS
[+12] u/whitesquirrle: I hate this clown. Like I dont hate much but I absolutely hate this fuck
[+12] u/COVIDtheDestroyer: You guys ever feel like there’s some sort of AI entity monitoring your trades that manipulates the market to specifically fuck you over?
[+12] u/Europeanroadbycar: I ran has submitted its response to Pakistan regarding the U.S. 45-day ceasefire proposal – IRNA
Iran rejects a temporary ceasefire and demands the following:
– A permanent end to the war on all theatres in the Middle East, including Lebanon and Gaza, with guarantees.
– The dismantling of all U.S. bases in the Persian Gulf.
– Implementation of a new transit protocol that recognizes Iranian control over the Strait of Hormuz and allows Iran to collect tolls.
– The lifting of economic sanctions on Iran.
– Acknowledging Iran’s right to peaceful uranium enrichment per its inherent right under the NPT and the United Nations charter.
– The paying of reparations for economic damages suffered during the war
Not sure how Mango reacted to this...
[+12] u/VellyJanta: BREAKING: WH attaché to Iran, Suq Madiq, says B-52s will be delivering deals to Iran directly
[+12] u/CriticalAnt2057: I love that Iran is not blinking
[+12] u/sanndman: too many taco believers. irans def getting bombed hard tonight.
[+12] u/Efficient-Macaroon66: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+11] u/Federal-Reception854: So much shit happening and it hasn’t even been half of his presidency yet
[+11] u/PossibleLack835: pls just dump already i promise i will be a good boy and take profit
[+11] u/Obvious_Coconut_8432: Unprecedented levels of situation monitoring going on here
[+11] u/mikeplaystennis: Pakistan pm wants Iran to open strait for 2 weeks as a goodwill. These algos are easy to trick 0 chance Iran does that 😂
[+11] u/Anonymustafar: Yeah let’s listen to Pakistan the guys who hid Osama from us
[+11] u/Master-Stranger8908: That tweet from Pakistan is jus so 🥭 can come later and say countries are begging not to bomb Iran and need more time lol
[+11] u/East-Description-243: Bet ya they hit four smaller power plants, some back up generators, 2 more bridges. T.H.E.T.A. Trump Hits Easy Targets Afterhours avoids war crimes and not a full taco. Still calls.
[+10] u/gentlesandwich: Put IV is fucked, and Call IV is fucked. This situation is balls and anyone claiming they're profiting off the chop are just straight up gambling.
[+10] u/Marshmallowmind2: I want off this algorithm
[+10] u/ComfortableNo5231: I've never see so many hulk scam candles in one day
[+10] u/Throw_Away_TrdJrnl: My god we're threatening to wipe entire countries off the map and spy still going to end the day green, stocks really only go up. I've been sitting on mostly cash for a drop that I'm becoming convinced will never happen even if we drop nukes
[+10] u/sauronII: Some of y‘all never had your dealer threaten to rip you into pieces and kill your entire family and it shows.
[+10] u/drcornwallis23: If you want to stop nuclear war get short rn
[+10] u/DrummerCompetitive20: Is the war over? We are green
[+10] u/Fine_Sock3874: tomorrow is going to make or break a lot of people
[+9] u/curiousguy1993: A magical deal will appear after Market close today 🥭🌮
[+9] u/lookingforajob2020: wtf was that insane candle
[+9] u/Some1getmeablanket: Can we please just dip back down to like $649 or something so I can load up on calls for the TACO
[+9] u/Nervous-Sky2414: IF the B52s are a head fake, then it's the best one I've ever seen.
[+9] u/humanoideric: For this evening's market consideration, the menu items are:
1. Tacos
2. Nuclear Armageddon
[+9] u/thefrozen_one: 🥭 is in talks to build a Disneyland on Kharg island, that’ll fix everything
[+8] u/lococommotion: Watch the taco not even happen and we still close green
[+8] u/winfortheboys: He who dares to use nukes is gay. Your welcome WORLD, I just saved yall asses.
[+6] u/forensicaccountaint: This is the guy who complained he didn’t win the peace prize ??
[+19] u/New_Persimmon_5041: This Pakistan thing that everybody’s going crazy about is nothing more than Pakistan begging Iran to back down. 🤣
Could you imagine being the United States president right now losing to Iran? Absolutely hilarious. Please please give me what we want. Iran is like lol no.
This is literally a group of folks that blow themselves up to get what they want. You don’t think they would be blown up lol insane
[+16] u/sufficiently7777: At 7:59pm-
“Iran just gave me a beautiful gift, some would even say the greatest gift, the likes of which has never been given”
[+16] u/Ferdoki: > TRUMP TO FOX NEWS ON PAKISTAN'S 2-WEEK PROPOSAL: CAN'T COMMENT, CURRENTLY IN HEATED NEGOTIATIONS
[+14] u/ItsHighNoonBang: If market does dump, bulls can't complain because they had 10 chances to sell the last 5 days
[+14] u/TABid-5073: 8pm: Trump declares great productive talks towards peace offering everything he's demanding and more from the leaders of Iran and temporarily delays their destruction for another week
8:05pm: Iran states no such talks have taken place
I would bet my entire life savings on this I'm just not sure how to. Polymarket??
[+14] u/ThinCrusts: Hey, at least we're not talking about the epstein files amirite?!
[+14] u/Brain-Silent: So were pumping because Pakistan a third party wants peace and not Iran😂
[+14] u/kjl8921: Biden’s autopen would’ve signed the deal already. I miss the Biden market 😢
[+14] u/rhuffq: A message from the US threatening to wipe out an entire nation and we close flat for the day. This timeline is amazing.
[+14] u/WarmMinimalist: The market crashed during three rate cuts and mooned during a massive energy war in the Middle East. It’s all a sham
[+14] u/ecoburner87: Pakistan: "please don't do this, maybe?"
SPY: +6%, no red candles
[+12] u/maplessbastard: Genuinely untradeable
[+11] u/kerrykingzgo-T: Has anyone said volume for ants yet? I got it. "WHAT IS THIS, VOLUME FOR ANTS?!"
[+11] u/Advanced_Divide_4641: AXIOS: Someone said something. Saying they’ll say more later.
[+11] u/ryu311: you crazy bastards you did it. green eod
[+11] u/bluen: Spy earnings tonight
[+11] u/No_Fig_7835: if this were a movie and djt was the president it would seem unrealistic.
[+10] u/EasySunday: Went from -1k to +1k. Im out. Good luck
[+10] u/Weak-Equal-9084: Usa is out of control and average american has no clue
[+10] u/PastThePast1: Pakistan's tweet is 100% a message from the US to the IRGC; Iran will never agree to a ceasefire. This is actually a bearish sign, it means that Iran and the US aren't actually talking. So obviously calls are the play here.
[+9] u/wrongrobertpatrick: Dick Cheney says hell is hot and he recommends to buy Haliburton
[+8] u/Erieztoys: Pretty Sad, when I need a civilization to be wiped out for my PUTs to print.
[+8] u/No-Fox-4742: Made $200 off puts lol
[+19] u/Fkn1v1mem8: I let 15k in puts ride. This is either my last trade or my last trade
[+13] u/Jalapenoplanter: I can’t get over that a sitting Us prez threatened to end civilization and the market just shrugged
[+13] u/ImSortaUseful: We are so retarded we believe in the country that hid osama from us
[+13] u/sam4o19: What’s crazy is it feels like no one really cares lol
[+12] u/emanresu711: It’s so obvious he’s not gonna do it so calls obviously. Therefore puts
[+11] u/LeagueofData: To my fellow gay bears. Three things are true:
1. There will be an oil supply shock.
2. Mango is going to manipulate the market.
3. He can't manipulate it forever.
Buy a June-Aug puts and hold on to your tits. See you in Valhalla.
[+11] u/Sad-Substance8684: Succulent Chinese meal
[+10] u/patmccock86: The market defaults to heavy up on any bullshit rumor, but going down is hard as diamonds
[+10] u/Total_Schedule591: We're getting an emergency press beefing at 5:40pm with actual on screen start at 6:30pm bc diaper
[+10] u/bigmeatbag: "I'm going to give Iran another 10 days because the Ayatollah was busy celebrating Easter by putting eggs up his 🌈 ass."- Donnie after the market closes.
[+9] u/sftheory: if I were a betting man .... wait, I am!
[+9] u/PlayFree_Bird: SPY and USO trading sideways together for a week is the clearest indication that nobody, not even the market makers, have a clue what is going to happen next.
[+9] u/Jdom666: stop calling it a pump unless we’re past 657
[+9] u/EpiphyticOrchid8927: IRAN WILL ADD OIL FACILITIES OF ARAMCO AND SAUDI'S YANBU AND UAE'S FUJAIRAH PIPELINE TO ITS TARGETS IF TRUMP ATTACKS THE COUNTRY'S POWER PLANTS - IRAN'S TASNIM
[+9] u/Basic-Kale3169: Fuck the Ancient Greek. If they didn’t invent their shitty language, my options would have more time before they expire to zero.
[+9] u/xavras_wyzryn: The last person on Earth after a nuclear fallout will most likely buy the dip. Ridiculous Pavlov conditioning at this point.
[+9] u/Careless-Pen8895: Voting for elongated muskrat stock to crash
[+9] u/thermalstress: 6 hours to go for god knows what
[+9] u/Double_Anybody: I was having trouble with my code and my boss kicks me off and takes over. Mfer burns 30 minutes running into the same issues I told him about and at the end just tells me my code was just fine then leaves 🙃
[+8] u/Crazy-Bluejay4388: My guess: he will escalate, spy will open -2%, then good news will come out, and spy will close flat.
[+8] u/Inner-Cobbler-2432: Guy above me has no clue his entire port will be nuked tonight.