▶ Full Post Text
[+19] u/5uckmyd1ckb1t4: BREAKING: MY WIFE & I HAVE REACHED A FRAMEWORK AGREEMENT FOR PEACE.
1. SHE WILL REOPEN “THE STRAIT” TO PREWAR LEVELS, EXCEPT NOW I MUST PAY HER $2,000 TO “TRANSIT.”
2. SHE STILL WONT GIVE ME MY GOLF CLUBS, BUT I CAN ASK HER AGAIN IN 30 DAYS.
3. I WILL GIVE HER MY BONUS CHECK.
[+16] u/__nameless____: This whole deal or no deal shit is beyond retarded, seriously 🤌🏻
[+15] u/you2234: Markets closed- go touch grass
[+15] u/Human-Ant-870: casino not open today. boring
[+15] u/Shoty6966-_-: The first $10 is the hardest
[+14] u/hv876: We got a deal, then we got concepts of a deal, and now we have a framework for 60 days to negotiate. Keep pumping!
[+14] u/bols_are_cooked: The top has never been this much in
[+14] u/hftrobo9285: Stonks mooning on the Mozambique bioluminescent fish market exchange
[+13] u/moorhound: Elon Musk is just a wild-ass human being.
During his DOGE retirement press conference in the Oval Office, he had a black eye and likely had a ketamine bump. Like, you can [watch that shit](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yy-jDGHygpg), skip around the first few minutes and tell me this dude doesn't look zooted.
Imagine walking into the fucking *White House* with a black eye, wearing a T-shirt that says "Dogefather", ripping a K-bump in the bathroom, and going on a national broadcast to spit some bullshit next to the President of the United States of America.
This guy's gonna be our first trillionaire. Elon might be a prick and kind of weird, but when it comes to seizing your own destiny, guy went full send.
[+10] u/No-Sympathy-686: Why on my day off does my cat decide to scream bloody murder and wake me up at 6am...
Little bastard...
[+10] u/Impressive_Trick_573: Have we forgotten that 🥭 was awarded the 🇮🇱 prize?
[+9] u/aDonkeyWithACarrot: I’ve crunched some numbers and calculated that I would need $10M to finally be happy 😃 🤓
[+9] u/PatFenis77: Mega green dildo so hard tomorrow.
[+9] u/vermilli21: How is 🥭 already shit posting at 6am
[+9] u/Excellent_Tourist633: Is SpaceX ging to cause the crash or do we have to wait for OpenAI?
[+9] u/UnivalveX: average wsb retard tomorrow once we open +1.5% : aNoThR ThEtA dAy
[+8] u/CumomEileen: Going to ignore margin callls from now and see what happens
[+7] u/Messer_Nexus: Bought a new Ford Focus, sounding like shit Tractor, does not feel like driving a car. What kind of shit did I buy? Should have listened to my friends' advice and bought something from VW.
Fukin puts Ford - they will never know how to make a car.
[+7] u/Moepenmoes: New thread, new opportunities, hello cuties 🥰
[+7] u/Messer_Nexus: Trust me! Losing $35K with 0DTE feels less worse than buying a car from Ford. I am so frustrated with this rubbish. How are they still in business with all this mess?
[+7] u/Madsen13140: Casino closed move on
[+7] u/Syllabub_Visual: Would hot girls in their 20s be willing to date a bald overweight 55 year old guy with a net worth of $300m?
[+6] u/ClarkFable: Everything is cumputer
[+6] u/CumomEileen: I might be the first trader who is actually too regarded for this sub and by several orders of magnitude
[+6] u/Sudden-Pressure8439: Let me in! Let me iiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnn!!!!
[+6] u/UnivalveX: he sold? tweet a trade deal is near another time
[+6] u/2020isgreat: There is an agreement it just hasn't be discussed, signed or seen yet
[+5] u/CUbuffGuy: Goin out to a sandbar today to get wasted with some baddies like a true American. Keep pumping my bags boys.
[+5] u/ClarkFable: Up 1.5% by 11am Tuesday, close -2%
[+5] u/CornMonkey-Original: day 3 of withdrawals is by far the worst. . . please, for the love of god - open the casino.
[+5] u/SoloOutdoor: I was gonna hunt turkeys this morning. Then it decided to rain again, fuck that.
[+5] u/callsonreddit: I've become addicted to puzzles because of this long weekend
[+5] u/Fancy_Rice_2799: You guys still not short oil? Might be the last day to pile in.
[+5] u/iamjt: Ok I'm done. Wasn't expecting Dow 51k
[+5] u/Specialist_Exam_8433: The year is 2035, SPY is at 20k. There's been one red day in the last decade. No deal has been reached, a gallon of gas is $10. Every red futes has been wiped out instantly by a 🥭 tweet or Axios article claiming for the 3000th time that a deal is near.
[+5] u/vermilli21: Market is forward looking 🤡
[+17] u/financiallythriving: Imagine missing out on the tech/semi run the past three years because you were cash or bear gang
[+16] u/FatFluffyFish: Turns out the great reset was resetting ber portfolio to $0
[+15] u/QuantrixQuintrix: wsb and crypto are the worst things to ever happen to me.
[+14] u/spellbadgrammargood: My parents, when they were my current age: We just bought a new house so every child can have their own room
Me: *Car check engine light goes on* ... I'm financially fucked..
[+11] u/Karl-Levin: Believe it or not I am buying more oil calls
[+11] u/Unsavory1: Oil is acting like this whole thing is done. I have a sinking feeling it isnt.
[+11] u/FatFluffyFish: Oh look talks are going well again. Mango is NOT HAPPY THE PUMP IS 1%
[+11] u/ajibtunes: Iran says it will not toll ships in the Strait of Hormuz, instead charging fees for “environmental protection.” -IRNA
[+10] u/cloud_cafe: The greatest deal the world has ever seen!
[+10] u/dljmonkeyboiz: The day he actually makes a deal will be the top
[+10] u/steem99: 1000 MU was promised to me 3000 seconds ago
[+10] u/DahyunDabFan: Turns out Memorial Day was for remembering the fallen 🌈🐻
[+10] u/AncientAd3846: If futes are fake and gey then hyperliquid futes are faker and geyer.
[+9] u/GlobalResolution77: Casino IS open, you just have restricted-pass tickets
[+9] u/Superente_: The fun part is that even if we don't get a deal or a shit one we will only go down 0.5%. So yeah SPY750 is the bottom now lmao.
Crazy stupid market but there won't be a correction comming soon
[+9] u/Upstairs_System_6257: US says iran won't get a dollar of assets unfrozen until uranium is removed. How can anyone believe this peace deal will ever be signed? 😂
[+9] u/Background-Nothing71: 🥭just really wanted to skip that wedding…sorry Bettina no one cares about you!
[+9] u/Fresh_Researcher_242: OPPPEEENNNN THHHEEEE CCAAAASSSIIINNNOOOOO
[+8] u/SilverVikingTT: Trump reiterates either ‘great’ deal with Iran or no deal
The US president says on Truth Social that the deal with Iran will either be a “great and meaningful deal or there will be no deal at all”.
Earlier, Secretary of State Marco Rubio expressed a similar sentiment, saying the US would either secure a strong deal with Iran or confront Tehran in “another way”.
[+8] u/LeupMeisterGenral: Holy fuck spy is up a whole 1%
[+8] u/mayorolivia: Chat, why is my trading app flat?
[+8] u/Aggressive_Bit_91: 🥭 trying to change the deal now that everyone is flaming him on how bad it was lmao.
[+8] u/tika_dengu: Palantir has a list of bers who consistently bet against 🇺🇸
[+8] u/Academic_Lock_1699: RKLB launching Space X satellites for their mega constellation today, more tomorrow. Easy 150$ + for the stock if everything goes well
[+7] u/495N: $785 in Frankfurt
MUawh 💋
[+7] u/anakin12: Ultra Green dildo in my 🐻 booty inc :(
[+7] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: Is the straight even open omg wtf bbq lmao
[+7] u/Wows_Nightly_News: I'm getting ads for airplanes. The algos must think I'm really good at this.
[+7] u/CalRippedken: Looking like a flat day today
[+6] u/mangled_degenerate: Someone did a good write up on KEEL:
https://x.com/i/status/2058109109032173821
[+6] u/sloanemonroe: Iran is so close to causing actual oil shortages to much of the world. Why give in now?
[+6] u/StonksInvesteur: have you ever felt like a MM looking at different porfolios on reddit, stumble across a guy's 3 figures portfolio, and be like: "Let's fuck this guy in particular."?
[+6] u/Logical-Clerk-1571: bols screaming PÖHMP UEEEET
bers screaming URANIUM STILL THERE
cash gang is... i don't know they are too silent
[+6] u/Gloomy_Necesary: Whats going to happen to RDDT tmrw? Pump with everyone else or resume its downward trend? I dont think itll keep going down forever but we will see when the trend reverses.
[+6] u/orsomeshitidk: I can’t believe there’s a federal holiday to mourn my bad 0dte choices.
[+6] u/Capt_Chickenpox: My etf's are outperforming my trades today, and i don't know how to feel about it. (Europoor so no holiday)
[+6] u/Czyzzle: Bridges and power plants or nah
[+6] u/QTpieme: Is Anyone else having a rough Monday with the market closed
[+6] u/Aggressive_Bit_91: Rubio seems pretty stressed
[+6] u/MeanLocalFriends: Here's the boring but likley forecast:
Both sides will agree to prepare war status quo/to be continued.
US will claim a "we set the nukes back 10 years" as a win.
Stocks will continue high valuation until/if earnings growth falters.
Ghey bers like me who thought the recession chance and the high oil tax on the poor would cause a dip will end up with $0 expired puts.
Im so ghey that I also moved my boggle head sleave from 60/40 to 50/50 because I didnt realize markets were so forward looking.
There's a chance that this event will disrupt earnings, so us bers will cling to that, but a meaningful dip is unlikely.
Thank you for your attention to this matter you crazy bastards.
[+6] u/AcademicStandard3701: I’m ready for the -3% dump for no reasons now Nasdaq
[+6] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: Call ur mom, tell her u love her
[+6] u/abroadbroadband: Dude if you have less than $100,000 between your brokerage and savings accounts, I only have one thing to say to you:
🫵 Keep your head up.
It's hard out here.
[+5] u/kim82352: > Trump : tltr ... Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Pakistan, Turkey, Egypt, Jordan, Bahrain and UAE, immediately sign the Abraham Accords, with "Iran potentially joining if a deal is reached."
this should bring oil to $50
[+5] u/Thebaxxxx: Once your put is halved sell that shit your bet is lost its over.
This is not inception pizza slice
[+5] u/SoothingWafer: Woke up to look at premarket then remembered it was closed.
Then I was sad.
[+5] u/Visible_Sentence_399: Can’t everyone else in the world trade today?
[+5] u/Total_Schedule591: "This time will be different" said the tard 🐥
[+5] u/Claaaa: "Trump links Abraham Accords signing to Iran negotiations"
The US president says he told the leaders of Saudi Arabia, Bahrain, the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Pakistan, Turkiye, Egypt and Jordan on Saturday that “it should be mandatory that all of these Countries, at a minimum, simultaneously, sign onto the Abraham Accords” after the deal with Iran is signed, normalising relations with Israel.
hard sell tbh
[+5] u/Logical-Clerk-1571: we are pumping hard with a fake deal, crashing with rockets
i can't even imagine Taiwan invasion or blockade
[+5] u/Complex-Video-2202: Mango loading massive oil calls.
[+5] u/nanopicofared: Deal with US not imminent, Iran says
[https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cglpp2yk336o](https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cglpp2yk336o)
[+5] u/Old-Pomegranate3634: bull and bears both lose today. Best part - theta gang also does not win
[+5] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: I hate to think of the olden days when kids didn’t have emojis 😞
[+5] u/awetfartruinedmylife: Stocks are pumping, I’m from eu and can see the reaction to the “Iran deal”
[+5] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: The straight will never open again but nobody gives a fuck 😂
[+23] u/HorseTanker: Negotiations are going well regarding the salary for that one job I want. I haven't submitted my application yet, but negotiations are proceeding excellently.
[+20] u/WSB-mods-are-: Reminder that if you're working today your job sucks and/or your boss hates you
Source: I'm working today
[+17] u/dorkstar1: ANTHROPIC IPO VALUATION: $850B
SAMSUNG VALUATION: $800B
ANTHROPIC REVENUE: $30B
SAMSUNG REVENUE: $230B
[+17] u/TipEmpty8429: Stockmarket in GTA5 online is still opening in 7 mins
[+17] u/A1ienspacebats: Americans watching the rest of the world in the casino during their market holiday.
https://preview.redd.it/q4c91sjlfa3h1.png?width=1280&format=png&auto=webp&s=a41f74f2910fc8d01ed7cfcd6985f42408772564
[+15] u/Throwaway_biglaw: I get it now. We never needed a deal to pump. The pump was within us all along! Thank you, Mr. 🥭, for showing the market it CAN pump 4% before tomorrow’s open.
[+15] u/whereistherosin: Canadian market ripping today 🚀
Going to collect some loonies
[+13] u/Les7X: Ameritards, it's so boring without your casino. Miss u
[+12] u/Jemmani22: So if oil futures expire while I'm holding. I own the barrels right?
Do they deliver them to my house?
[+12] u/SonOfObito: Italian stock market 26 year high…
Even the europoors are thriving. Tuesday +2%
[+11] u/OsamaBagHolding: Thomas Massie didn't kill himself!
(Just practicing)
[+11] u/Brilliant_Object_847: Lmao so the deal is now about signing the Abraham Accords
[+11] u/aabbcc_gei: man i just want my puts to print so i can get some Albanian chicks 🐻
[+11] u/A1ienspacebats: Just want you US bulls to know that Canadian markets are open and the S&P is printing money. Have fun tomorrow
[+11] u/NotGucci: No deal but who cares. Bulls are just better at this then bears.
[+10] u/beachsandwichen: Can the market open so I can quit learning shit about this dumbass odyssey movie
[+10] u/bluen: Bruhs even mcdonalds deals prices on the app went up 😳
[+10] u/LeagueofData: Is the peace deal in the room with us?
[+10] u/xlmtothemoon: mango talking in about 2 hours, should be intradasting
[+9] u/trust_it_bb: Iran agreed to not toll the strait.
Open for all.
They agreed to it in the MOU.
The highly touted framework of a deal.
Then it comes out that they will instead take control of the strait because then they can charge environmental fees, which are technically not tolls.
LMAO the progress made is a technicality.
[+9] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: > “Our deal is the exact opposite, but nobody has seen it, or knows what it is.”
[+9] u/L2F_mens_glutes: \*\* imagine your wife wanting to leave you after you lost your software engineer job at meta making 175k because you prob not gonna get another one like that again\*\*
[+9] u/WorkingAd7387: nasdaq almost 30000 lul
BEAr Fuk
[+8] u/Fit_Neighborhood9251: Abraham accords? More like SPYsuicide accords and straight closed for 3 more months accords
AM I RITE
[+8] u/kaapooj: this bubble is a crime against the majority. we are all getting debased
[+8] u/Dull_Broccoli1637: *Iran warned Monday that, while some progress had been made, it was not yet close to striking a deal with United States to end the Middle East war, as 🥭 also said he was in no hurry to sign.*
Calls it is.
[+8] u/OsamaBagHolding: insane value play, he's leveraging one losing negotiation to lose another set of negotiations.
[+8] u/Bromine_Bro35: OPEN THE FUCKING CASINO YOU CRAZY BASTARDS!!
[+8] u/Prestigious_Key1755: The Canadians are trading
[+8] u/ComfortableSweet1965: I love the TSX. Gotta cool ring to it.
[+8] u/xShiftfaced: Futures haven’t dumped a dime lol 🥴
[+8] u/stupidber: Flat as fuck today. Theta gang wins again
[+7] u/TipEmpty8429: There’s three million of us in this sub, could we make our own trading index that runs 24/7
[+7] u/TipEmpty8429: speech in two hours… uh oh
[+7] u/big_chestnut: only fans might be more profitable
[+6] u/Techmonk1234: I'm done waiting for a dip to enter in. Nothing stops this green rally -
Not bad CPI print, not a new Fed chair, not Iran war crisis, not bond yields jump.
[+6] u/steelejt7: iran deal bye bye but mango can reduce the price of oil by 8% with a fake headline ? when will dt stop manipulating oil price with fake news articles? just let my oil stocks ride bro🥲
https://www.reddit.com/r/news/s/3KwOBgfZoP
[+6] u/Xx360StalinScopedxX: I miss the times of playing Jak II on my tube tv while snacking on some microwaved dino nuggets.
[+6] u/milkywaygalaxy71: Such a boring thread. Just deal no deal stuff nothing else
[+6] u/MagicMushroomsMM: Life is meaningless without the market.
[+6] u/Dismal-Annual4078: not the same without US casino
[+6] u/Level_Ad8089: bitcoin kills people with boredom
[+6] u/No-Employment1276: RKLB July calls gonna print?
[+6] u/TipEmpty8429: Every market pumping except US
[+6] u/drankleanonce: wtf is an abraham accordion please tell me
[+6] u/Unfamous_Trader: How funny would it be if market reverses red before open tomorrow before bulls can cash out
[+6] u/Icy-Tea-2954: Some of you have a tenuous grasp on the English language and it shows
[+6] u/sounbaggie: I ain't reading allat
[+5] u/Axwe8: # OPEN THE CASINO 🤡 🤡 🤡
[+5] u/Civil_Worry_1468: NOK getting closer to 50$
[+5] u/UNEXPECTED_PREQUEL: 🥭: "The peace deal is going FANTASTIC!! I told Mr. Iran that if he doesn't take it we will NUKE them!! Thank you for your attention to this matter and praise be to Allah!"
[+5] u/WalrusHonda: Anyone have Thoughts on Home Depot ?
[+5] u/Any-Presentation5438: OPEN THE CASINO NOW!!!
[+5] u/Castopliani: Strait never opens again. It's not even gay it's just asexual
[+5] u/uncsucks: This holiday algo pump will be reversed tomorrow, no deal, nothing has changed
[+5] u/Low_Trick4604: So bored IaActually have to work
[+5] u/_IsNull: Twitter 2021: 5.1 billion
SpaceX , Twitter, xAI 2025: 3.2 billion
🧐
[+5] u/Few_Dealer6977: I'm having withdrawls pls 2x the day
[+5] u/rapsfan1515: In Canada SOXS is down 6.5%
[+5] u/hermeskino715: Funny to always see futures still acting like it's market open today
[+5] u/SuperNewk: It keeps melting up!!
[+5] u/niceee_guyyy: Why Maple market ripping
[+5] u/whomakesthetendies: #Iran claims it shot down ‘hostile drone’ in Gulf airspace
[+5] u/Legendary-Lemon: > Iran claims it show down hostile drone in Gulf airspace
Iran shuts down a drone and suddenly there is a pump from 0.86 to 0.97. What the actual fuck is this market on? Lmao
[+5] u/BeepBoopDep: Lmao you telling me all the boomer gloom bears were circle jerking over on Friday didn't help and their puts are still fuk? Colour me surprised 🐻🤡
[+5] u/Smart-Carrot5238: Sorry Bers this ain't Robinhood traders driving this up it's actual smart Money....they know what's about to happen.....crashing up the only crashing that's going on
[+5] u/Arnab_Goswami_RTV: Ber if you close your eyes
Does it almost feel like nothing changed at all
[+16] u/Willing-Angle-2203: I'll be the old man yelling at the clouds: there won't be a deal. The market is playing games and soon the music will stop.
let's remember who are the 3 key figures in this war.
Bibi, Trump, and the IRGC. Not exactly 3 parties that see eye to eye. For the conflict to end someone will lose, and Iran is literally fighting for their existence. I hope you bols make some profit and take some profits soon, the run we are seeing will not go on for long
[+14] u/looool_k_libtard: Started grilling every day in my tiny windowless basement and about halfway through I get really sick and pass out. I’ll wake up and eat 6 grilled hot dogs which fixes me but I wonder if I have the flu
[+13] u/ferrx: I swear SPY hasn’t moved all morning. I’ll keep staring and let you all know in 3-4 hours
[+12] u/Repulsive-Ice-5836: Dad why are we poor?
Cause i spent my golden years shorting the greatest semi bullrun of all time, son.
Why are you so retarded dad?
[+12] u/Icommandyou: So like what happens if the headline continues to say peace talks but oil inventories simply run out, do we just wake up one day at breaking news there is no gas lol
[+12] u/Scalpaholic: Iranians going back to Tehran.
My guess is 🥭 will say some stupid tweet about Deal going well for a last pump, day trade into the strength, and then load up shorts/puts to capitalize on a most heinous rug pull yet when attacks resume.
Then reload stonks and tweet 60 day pause now in effect no cap on god for realz.
[+11] u/TheMallard1: BREAKING: Howie Mandel to host Iran vs USA in DEAL OR NO DEAL
[+9] u/UnholyTrigon: 99% of bers in here think bulls only buy 0dte otm calls, they don’t realize my calls are deep ITM and expire next year
[+9] u/Bichael-Murry: ai is boomer tech basically and gen-z hates it apparently
[+9] u/lionkevin713: First weekday I haven’t lost money in a while
[+9] u/soccawalka5: I took a pill in EBITDA
[+8] u/VolcanicCupid69: So….. there is no chance 🥭 can accept Iran in control/tolling the straight and nuke talks deferred until later. This is going nowhere fast. Tough to claim we won the war and Iran ends up in a stronger negotiating position than before the war. Bombs by Wednesday …….. not too many, just enough to seem like we have a plan that may work someday.
[+8] u/pussy_ass_licking: Can anyone tell me why nasdaq futes up 1.4%?
[+8] u/Valkyrie_Skuld: It is a damn holiday weekend at 10 am and these fuckers are cutting down trees in my neighborhood
[+8] u/sai656: My stupid ass thought the casino is open today smhh
[+7] u/Repulsive-Ice-5836: Will a ber ever be right or intelligent? The answer is sadder than you think...
[+7] u/Stuckinthesandbox: The CEO of BlackRock, Larry Fink, admits that the trillions of dollars being used to build data centers and power grids will come from ordinary people’s savings accounts and pension funds, and says it is mandatory.
He says America needs trillions in AI infrastructure spending, and that people will be forced to “invest” in it.
“Much of this will come from savings accounts and pension accounts.”
“Socialism for me, but not for thee”
[+7] u/OkTax379: Sell the top when Iran deal is announced.
[+7] u/diefy7321: SPY could be $1000 eom, but Bers will still try to convince you that market gaf what the eyeranians say lmfaoooo
[+7] u/SnooRegrets6428: Market is broken. Nothing is moving
[+7] u/mavreix: Sell in may and goon away
[+7] u/Pazzaaaaaa: Futies starting to limp dick
[+7] u/rubsdikonxpensivshit: [r/dividends](r/dividends) is probably your best bet, but it’s way less fun than arguing with a bunch of room temp IQs while we all lose money on short dated options
[+6] u/illinformed-will: Holy shit grandpa in full tweet stroke...
''they better join in, but if they don't that's fine, actually it would be bad because if they do it would be the greatest thing ever ! Also i think progress are so good that i'll bomb them even more if progress are bad. Thank you for your attention to this mental collapse''
[+6] u/UnholyTrigon: Imagine buying put options when the president and his family are literally day trading call options
[+6] u/WhiteWhenWrong: Bears are a wild breed. Imagine being right one time every 5 years and riding that high every day thinking you’re some kinda genius and are going to be right tomorrow
[+6] u/Sharp_Design_119: I hereby declare a declaration declaring declaration of a peace deal declaring a declaration frameworking a framework of a declaration surrounding an Iranian uranium deal of declaration
[+6] u/Ledd10: CEO of our small company just patted me on the shoulder and gave me some friendly advice that I should be happier and smile more in the workplace after fucking me out of my comission.
What a nice guy, he does care!
[+6] u/W0lv3rIn321: Can you read? “Tehran acknowledged progress”
[+5] u/gervs99: Do you think 🥭 uses Viagra while tweeting
[+5] u/SlartibartfastMcGee: Bears claiming a moral victory because the fundamentals would have made for a red day Tuesday if not for the Iran deal will never not be hilarious.
Congrats guys, you can read a chart but you can’t read the room.
[+5] u/Worried_Quarter469: Donald selling golden get out of draft tickets for $5M by Friday 5 PM
[+5] u/Artistic_Chicken_557: Market not even moving today
[+5] u/nemo_hoesss: Nvda 250 this week, the people need you
[+5] u/Commercial_Ease8053: Today, a patient told me Google AI is smarter than me… not really an insult I guess.
[+5] u/No-Improvement3164: SOXL and TQQQ how did you guys know?
[+5] u/BlackKnightsOptions: Who's been shorting my oil futes
[+5] u/burnttoast14: As a Canadian i wish our stocks had more volume like American stocks behind them
[+5] u/Happy-n-Healthy: 33 Ships went thru the Strait, 240 waiting, ber r fuk
[+5] u/yeedub: Who's rage trading this fake market with puts
[+5] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: Boring day here, going to r/ValueInvesting with a hazmat suit on.
[+5] u/Last_Activity9855: Passed by my old wage slave job today and all the same people are working there years later. Meanwhile I'm taking over the fking world. It warms my heart. It really does.
[+5] u/CaptainSt0nks: Look how much the world has changed since the end of covid. I fully expect NVDA and GOOG to race to $10T within the next 2 years. RKLB to $1T.
[+5] u/rottenfence: Calls on my blackberry bushes
[+5] u/Asleep-Strike4978: Ceasefire will be served hot tomorrow morning
[+5] u/diefy7321: There needs to be a filter function on here that filters out all the 1-3 month old bers accounts lmfaoo
[+5] u/Zuko2001: MU wil make another run for 800 the question is whether thats a good place to exit or hold on till ER?
[+5] u/ThinkingOfTheOldDays: it's a wazi, it's a wuzi.
[+5] u/_rockthemike: Deal or no deal? Who cares, calls
[+5] u/Typical-Layer-1253: Damn it man. I de risked a lot end of April. Could’ve made an extra 100k if I held onto options and leverage fucking hell. Still went from 150k to 220k in a month still but still
[+5] u/gervs99: Using today to remember how good my portfolio used to be
[+5] u/Sensitive_Pilot3689: Markets are NOT FAKE
[+5] u/LetThemDown: I need to fap urgently
[+5] u/hollywoodrew: Everyone bearish on SpaceX tells me it’ll pump hard 🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀
[+5] u/Virtual_Secretary_98: What is MU % increase in European markets?
[+5] u/Mr_Madrass: Is this Abraham accords some mailing list that you pay Mango to be on or what?
[+5] u/imustbegthequestion: Lowe's Home Improvement ftw.
[+17] u/Ble_h: Fucking bers convinced my dumbass to sell last Friday.
[+14] u/kanyedidnothingwr0ng: Rugpull of the century coming......on puts
[+14] u/fools_eye: **Senior Iranian officials confirm plans to transfer enriched Uranus to Israel**
[+13] u/AprilsSecretAccount: Survey finds that Americans are more obsessed than ever with luxury goods, such as reliable transportation and mental health.
[+13] u/JoocePop: i jerk off like 7 times a day and lay in bed all day during my time off work. not even joking
[+12] u/CMTTrader: \*IRAN SEEKS GUARANTEES FROM CHINA BEFORE PROCEEDING WITH THE AGREEMENT WITH THE UNITED STATES
\*IRAN IS READY TO REMOVE HIGHLY ENRICHED URANIUM FROM ITS TERRITORY
\*IRAN REQUIRES THE TRANSFER OF HIGHLY ENRICHED URANIUM TO CHINA
[+10] u/Pluth: Bers are here worried about their shorts.
Buls are BBQing and getting wasted.
[+10] u/Provolone-Jones: Bulls downvoting when I call the peace deal fake news lol cope harder. 🥭 killed the only IRGC leaders that wanted to negotiate and the young guns who live in caves now and don’t care about the economy want blood in return. Iran is more than happy to fuck with you until the oil runs dry and 🥭 is too desperate to understand that. It’s war or slow death. Nothing in between.
[+9] u/Maximum-Magazine-333: Now 🥭 is gonna stall until next weekend, and we do it all again, every weekend
BULL MARKET 100 YEARS MORTY, WE’RE PUMPING FOREVER YOU LITTLE FUCK
[+8] u/nasdaqslut: Did we reach peak market efficiency? My stocks ain’t moving at all today
[+8] u/BRodIsRad: I'm so excited to lose money tomorrow I'm fucking shaking
[+8] u/Muted-South4737: All headlines are citing the same source. Any given headline is either
1. Deal is *basically* done
Or
2. Not in a rush to make the deal
My man's tryna have it both ways.
[+8] u/FuckleUp: UPS just dropped off a palette of enriched uranium
[+8] u/Unhappy_Hedgehog_808: Lmao "The West", you mean the USA and their government who not only destroyed a negotiated nuclear agreement with Iran, but then went ahead and started a war with them.
[+8] u/Candid_Payment_4094: MU is traded on European exchanges, and it's up by 4.5%
[+7] u/ComfortablePiglet842: Bears went from bags to rags
[+7] u/fools_eye: Which fake headline popped up now?
[+7] u/Samjabr: Looking at OIL, on the phone ordering my new pink Lambo
[+7] u/No_Stand5622: Bers memorial day will be tomorrow after open
[+7] u/Provolone-Jones: Oil still $90 after Iran said a deal is not imminent and we’ve lost over 1.2 billion barrels? Apparently people think oil companies have a duty not to make any profits.
[+7] u/whodey84: Market faded that Iran/China guarantee news
[+7] u/OhhPeeee: I think it's pretty unpatriotic and disrespectful to those that died for our freedom to NOT have the casino open on Memorial Day if you ask me.
[+7] u/Material-Gift6823: Stop complaining. You made some peoples salary in a month
[+6] u/Polladeacero: I need a miracle right about now
[+6] u/CosecSecCot: You people don't understand the market.
Unironically the longer the Strait is closed the more bullish it is for the market. 🥭 tweets are the primary market driver, so if the Strait is closed for longer then it can price in more tweets.
The day the Strait opens, the market will be flat.
[+6] u/PopularCut4124: So rigged the market reacts before the news is published lol
[+6] u/skarfbeaulonee: Tragically as many as 1.6 trillion bugs will die unnecessarily today due to windshield violence.
[+6] u/CheffromNowhere: US Tech 100 ripping. NVDA is gonna blow faces off tomorrow
[+6] u/Star_Lord924: Hoping that QCOM continues to push up. They have an investor conference june 24thor 28th i believe and then earnings end of july. My 220c already ITM and up 88%.
[+6] u/Rosebunse: So I decided to go see the new Star War movie today. Good movie, had fun, but I was really running late. I almost didn't go but thought, why not? I was late by 40 minutes and the movie was just starting.
40 minutes.
[+6] u/Vikkio92: I thought the casino was closed today
[+6] u/L0pat0: Thats not just a statement — its a revelation
[+6] u/confused_teabagger: bers don't fuk with oil futures, that is the most manipulated game in all of investing. It is easier to just bet that food companies are not going to come down on prices out of the goodness of their hearts.
[+5] u/nemodigital: Things are ripping on the Canadian exchange
[+5] u/ThouOne: Finally peace in the middle east for the first time since 5000 years 😭
[+5] u/AwarenessRoyal4717: Bers are just bols for North Korea
[+5] u/EngineerElectrical73: Who decided that the casino must be closed on holidays?
[+5] u/Dependent-Media-1857: when casino is open they'll make this flat lmao
[+5] u/ConsiderationKey1658: Poo yourself at work tomorrow and extend the long weekend
[+5] u/Initial_Ad_9250: Orders not getting filled
[+5] u/KYEEZY98: I’m supposed to be retired by now off my Lightning McQueen NFT
[+5] u/No_Economist3815: My best trading day in weeks today. Nice!
[+5] u/Put_Er_There_Sport: Theyre not letting futes fall below +.85% were about to see a +4-5% week
[+5] u/WrexyWrex: I don't fully agree with Marxism and maybe don't at all but I do appreciate it defining the problems with the current system we have.
I just don't think the solutions it provides are realistic.
It just points out the dynamics. Like people don't actually hate jobs, but they hate being managed through a mediator on behalf of capital to squeeze them.
It just points out that it's a lifeless system, but Marxism isn't any different. We just need to introduce a way for recourse when people are being taken advantage of no matter the legal loopholes being used it should be understood that it's not okay.
I think that would fix a lot.
[+5] u/HighwayExotic2808: On one hand, I hate trading day holidays because it’s so boring but could you imagine losing like $10k Christmas morning or right before Thanksgiving dinner?
[+5] u/Ble_h: Fucking Israel popping off again in Lebanon. Bibi big mad.
[+5] u/andyman268: I am highly regarded as a trader
[+5] u/No_Height2939: Just discovered frvo a geothermal company its valuation is kind of crazy similar to oklo but i feel like if you love the smr stocks this is better and looks to execute sooner with cape station plant in utah opening soon. Not sure i want to touch it with the amount of growth already baked in though.
[+5] u/Waste-Milk2716: “After today’s market moves, the most likely scenario already appears to be largely priced in. Therefore expect some ‘sell the news’ dynamics once a deal is finally reached, and I would refrain from adding exposure to equities until yield curves move lower.” - Singular Bank
[+5] u/Former-Ad-6013: Iran will never agree to that, so the West is posturing because we cannot escape the quagmire it created
[+5] u/Icy_Jelly_315: 🤓 identical twin studies suggest 37% genetic determination of cuntdom, the other 63% and your own hard work. We proud of you son
[+5] u/sayemsosa: Yesterday the japan futures run up 3% blasting through ATH on literally a straight line
[+5] u/Cinq_A_Sept: I need to read timestamps on all of these now. Days are not fine grained enough with orange clown spouting bs 24x7
[+17] u/ILikeWhatISee69420: I HAVE MONEY TO GIVE TO THE MARKET MAKERS, OPEN UP.
[+16] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: I identify as a retard
[+16] u/ILikeWhatISee69420: What is oil even used for? Does it have ai integration? Seems kind of useless.
[+16] u/widerdog: iran rejected peace deal hmmm
[+15] u/stuntondeezh0es: That brother with 163k in puts over the weekend may be cooked I won’t lie, chat
[+15] u/hioman01: Iran declined fake deal which means we are getting real deal done soon
[+14] u/WendyDumpsterFire: How are futures up if there is no deal 🤡🤡🤡
[+14] u/Put3socks-in-it: I’m watching the president right now standing next to VP and defense sec plus others and he’s legitimately orange. The other people are white, but he is orange. Why
[+14] u/DiamondHands667: Woke up and snorted a few line of coke only to realize the market is closed.
[+14] u/ercanbas: Open the casino you crazy bastards!!!
[+13] u/sufficiently7777: Mods abusing power is why Reddit will never be a behemoth
[+13] u/StonkGoUp: I love all the bro-millionaire advice floating around socials. Like if you want to be rich buy only 1 kind of outfit so you can save time in the morning. Bro they do that because they’re fucking autistic virgins not because it saves them 2 minutes
[+13] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: I'm very happy that i joined Wsb, i was expecting a serious place where I can talk about economics and fundamentals and i'm not disapointed.
[+13] u/greyenlightenment: there will never be a deal or resolution. this will drag out for the rest off his term and whoever replaces him.
[+12] u/djai50: No reason casino should be closed on holidays since most trades are computerized.
[+12] u/drytexterfinalboss: Spy returns after first three months of a new fed chair:
*Jerome Powell: -7%
• Janet Yellen: -4%
• Ben Bernanke: -2%
• Alan Greenspan: -33%
• Paul Volcker: -10%
• William Miller: -3%
• Arthur Burns: -7%
• William Martin: -8%
• Thomas McCabe: -4%
• Marriner Eccles: -8%
• Eugene Black: -21%
• Eugene Meyer: -32%
Bol bros🫣
[+12] u/jerome-yellen: No Iran deal = market doesn't care about Iran.
Iran deal = that's great news, let's pump!
[+11] u/ItsLegendaryRedmen: Mfs can't gamble for 1 day and suddenly become fut traders
[+11] u/Milksteak_Sandwich: [MU.TO](http://MU.TO) up 5.33% today. It's going to be a green week. Get your holes ready Bers
[+11] u/StonkGoUp: Our fallen would want the stock market open today. This is unpatriotic
[+11] u/thecRedditor123: Watch 🥭 drop more bombs just for the market to pump and oil to drop 10% just to spite the 🐻
[+11] u/LaserBeamer17: lol bears celebrating all day Friday when they thought striking Iran was back on the menu. They actually thought, for the 200th time 😂
[+11] u/Key_Improvement_9229: Some of you have never been around a Bullsh*tter and it shows!
“Theres a deal! We are almost there! No deal! Balls in their court!!”
This is why we call it a circus… lies, lies, lies…
Its all hot air and garbage, nothing is happening beyond what was already negotiated- best we can hope for is status quo, we will likely get hosed…
[+10] u/TheoryInttro: What the fuck is this bullshit? Injecting the Abraham Accords into the negotiations?
Does he WANT them to fail? Did he short the market?
[+10] u/silverfutes: Y’all ever seen two equally stupid people play chicken? Always a good ending. 🍿
[+10] u/Muted_Thought8382: If bers could go back in time to liberation day 1.0 and 2.0 (not that long ago, actually), I guarantee they would still not buy the dip even knowing for certain we would hit multiple all time highs. Why? Hate money I guess
[+10] u/qrqrafafzvzv: It's my day off, why am I sitting behind my computer looking at futures?
[+10] u/CPA-hole: What the fuck am I supposed to be doing?
[+10] u/Lake-Dependent: OIL dumping based on the fact that there is NO DEAL and the straight is still closed
[+9] u/Skeezerman: if we pump tomorrow i probably break 7 figures for the first time
[+9] u/Humble_Code_6501: We are July 2028, Mango is missing Olympics opening ceremony. He's going to the WH instead because he's so close to have a deal with Iran...
[+9] u/Feisty-Basis7903: How do I join the Abraham accord ?
[+8] u/StonkGoUp: I ate so much fruit in one sitting and I genuinely feel like I could blow a hole through the bottom of my toilet like a gunshot
[+8] u/TrickyDickCheney: Seems like taco genuinely wants to taco and give Iran a good deal to get out of this but then everyone and their mother in his orbit gets mad about it so he tacos again
[+8] u/FreeTheDimple: Can't wait to invest tomorrow. Literally shaking. It's called dedication.
[+8] u/KayMS_: OPEN THE CASINO YOU CRAZY BASTARDS!
[+8] u/Onnimation: It's like watching a room full of toddlers from both sides:
**"Deal with US not imminent", Iran says**
[+7] u/isolated-cat: can we end this deal no deal bs already mr 🥭. let's invade a new planet instead
[+7] u/NeighborhoodDry1821: The timing on the release of these headlines since the war came out is crazy
Random bullish headlines when bouncing on support
[+7] u/wildcat1055: I heard Iran will get access to billions of their funds, as long as they use them to pump 🥭 favorite stocks
[+7] u/wildcat1055: Great news fam: this Iranian baddie will let me through the Hormuz
[+7] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: Breaking News: yup strait is still closed
[+7] u/Good_Application6245: piece of shit market just completely flat how am i supposed to gamble on this
[+6] u/StonkGoUp: I heard talks are going bad
[+6] u/Inst_Sock_Sales_Rep: Financial Advisors are overrated
[+6] u/liikenneaksioma: Tuesday will be Fyre Fest for the bears
[+6] u/Severe-Selection-256: I always forget Best buy exists is it just me ?
[+6] u/sherhil: Bad news doesn’t even matter. Trump is not letting this market crash. It’s 100% rigged. If I could only follow my own advice.
[+6] u/tandoori_taco_cat: Holiday. Americans get one a year as a treat
[+5] u/NYGiants181: Just getting my day started
Bers still fuk?
[+5] u/Snowman33001: I’m considering buying MSFT outright considering how hated it is.
I may be a liberal arts college dropout, but I can turn that ship around.
[+5] u/LavishnessTimely7372: How are foreign markets doing?
[+5] u/99Fan: As a Canadian I feel so ripped off we don’t get today off.
[+5] u/tandoori_taco_cat: Planet: Where is this deal? Can I see it?
🥭: ... no
[+5] u/hallett21: SPY volume near zero for months while it rockets 10+% in 2 months. Probably nothing.
[+5] u/wolololord: Most upvoted reply decides what I eat later. Has to be edible
[+5] u/BeautifulHoneydew316: I regret so many things
[+5] u/Stealthless: Casino closed today, go back to Wendy’s now
[+5] u/A55BAG: NOK up 133% ytd and insider just bought more stock today .. maybe the rally is not a pure meme rally 🤔
[+5] u/Dear_Respond4522: If youre ever in a confrontation with a man from kansas simply move diagonally and their navigation system will crash
[+5] u/Sir_Wayne_Giggsy: At least I don't have 162k of puts
[+5] u/big-baller-47: Only giving my wife’s boyfriend half cash and half stock from now on for their date 🫡
[+5] u/Iamhappilyconfused: I just never take them off
[+12] u/ElkQuiet1541: Iran is not compromising on anything.. how is this a "negotiation"?
[+12] u/bklotrgoblet: Comments move so fast no one will ever see that I'm gay
[+11] u/StandardDot5115: Hey man can you put the burger on top of the nuggets so it doesnt get squished
[+9] u/TonyStarks81: I had a dream that I turned a single trade into $2 million in one day. I couldn’t believe it watching the stock blast up minute by minute. There was no reason for the rise and nothing that would justify it continuing to run but it wasn’t stopping. It is approaching market close and I need to make a decision to hold over night or sell and be a millionaire. I struggle with the decision, what if I sell and it doubles tomorrow. I hover over the sell button as the clock approaches 4pm. The clock strikes 4pm and I didn’t hit the sell button. The price sits still. I panic knowing that I should have sold. That is when I woke up. Fucking wildly vivid dream and far too real for how my dumb shit brain may actually handle the situation.
[+9] u/OG_L0c: My dad said that volatile gas prices don't affect him because he buys $10 every time, and it's always $10
[+9] u/netflix-ceo: > But there roles are just not needed anymore
Mr "director" please learn to spell properly first
[+8] u/TreGet234: The saas collapse is still wild tbh. Massive profits and moats repriced to be worth far less in this uncertain ai future.
[+8] u/Delicious_Put_5857: >7 Ebola patients escaped from a hospital in Monbgwalu, Congo after it was attacked by angry relatives.
[+8] u/DataExternal4451: Open casino, I want to see ber cry about market manipulation😂👉🐻🤡
[+8] u/fomoandyoloandnogrow: **BREAKING NEWS**
**As beef prices continue to soar, McDonald’s has been upgraded to a buy with the introduction of the new $10 value menu.**
[+8] u/boogeyman070: Let's gap up 3% like Nikkei
[+8] u/Flat-Focus7966: I don't blame the people who bought puts on Fri. The thought crossed my mind too & for the 500th time in last 2 months....I resisted it
Its the quickest way to lose money
[+8] u/Much-Management9823: Do not redeem the larp saar
[+7] u/Distinct_Car7737: Tomorrow is going to be red
[+7] u/No-Intention-8907: Man, this negotiation is like 4-d chess. Thankfully we have a master strategist in charge in 🥭.
[+7] u/netflix-ceo: Tasnim, Iran's state-affiliated news agency, denies an Al Hadath report claiming Tehran is prepared to export its highly enriched uranium. Tasnim says no nuclear commitment exists in the current agreement text and calls the Saudi outlet's claim of Iranian sourcing a fabrication tied to U.S. psychological operations.
[+7] u/cloudsofgrey: That's cool and all but can you just hand me my fries
[+7] u/Avocadonot: They should just bow down like all other gutless countries
[+6] u/Illustrious_Job1951: All these data centers filled with gpus, don't they know those are for gaming....DUH. why don't they use cpus, put me in charge and ill fix this 😤
[+6] u/goofy-boots: planning on slamming a pizza and 5 beers before 4pm then vegetate on my couch until 9
[+6] u/ANJR2: I need to pay for this wedding somehow. 0dtes will either get me there or I’ll be under a bridge on tinder again.
[+6] u/blemdemman: dreaming of shrek cocks
[+6] u/Snow_Shaman: "IRAN TO OPEN HORMUZ 30 DAYS AFTER US DEAL TO END FIGHTING - NIKKEI" -First Squawk
https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2058957414926594314?s=20
[+6] u/Fit-Employ3623: Calls on vought shares
[+6] u/fomoandyoloandnogrow: It’s a good thing we are making money in this market, cause a $35 chuck roast that’s only 2.25 pounds is fucking insane
[+6] u/irrelephantiasis: anytime people are jacked to the tits in here confidently echoing a foreseen given it isn’t what is expected by market open somehow. i know because i’ve been on the jacked to the tits sure thing sure thing scenarios too many times.
[+6] u/SomePolack: Bulls in here posting furiously, fighting ghosts
[+6] u/TechBubbleTrouble: People just follow what others do or tell them. No one thinks for themselves anymore and that’s exactly where top dogs want you to be
Buy my course to learn how to escape this mind trapping matrix
[+5] u/Able_Durian_1832: So the regime change is no longer on the agenda?
[+5] u/BFox1982: His tweets are so disjointed, bruh.
[+5] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: don’t y’all have family you can spend time with here today instead of shitposting?
me either 😞
[+5] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Lost
/u/OscarCapac made a bet that MU would go to 999.0 within **2 weeks** when it was 795.181 and it did not, so they were banned for a week.
Their record is now 1 wins and 4 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse) | [Post Verified Trades](https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/1pp3o5t/verified_trader/)
[+5] u/Fit-Employ3623: Getting j*b is tougher 😭
[+5] u/FartSniffer66642069: Is Robinhood down? Stock prices arent changing.
[+5] u/Angel_Diaz17: So the market will be going up tomorrow?
[+5] u/RelentlessPutz: Few years ago I took out a huge loan thinking in a year I could refinance it at a decent rate... 3 years later rates haven't changed....
[+5] u/DragonFruit-_-777: HOLY BEARS ARE FUCKED
[+5] u/OrdinaryMix4013: idk why Iran is negotiating with a convicted felon LMAO
[+5] u/Agile-Character-4086: My rgti and AMD puts are safe after all. Iran not following through with negotiations lets goooo im about to be a rich man
[+5] u/Hot_Sacks: Got the shakes bad today- open the casino already
[+5] u/Neader: There are actually bears celebrating in here rn lmao wtf
[+5] u/Isometric_exercises: So are we in the green tmrw or what?
[+5] u/cripky: GLD is a real cock sucker rn
[+5] u/QuadzillaStrider: you can try before you buy, ya know?
[+5] u/pokehexem: lots of sell orders in this area sooo
[+5] u/LongStreet68: We remember the bers, in their infinite gayness
[+5] u/Throwawayz911: Dissos like ketamine can allow you to perform unspeakable acts without feeling anything. Explains Elon pretty well.
[+5] u/Geoff_Dawmer: SOCK MARKET! Everyone buy new socks!
[+5] u/Pereise1: Lol jeez Lie Social needs some sort of character limit
[+5] u/Bagholder147: Post Quantum Encryption, Contract with Lockheed, 6G partnership with NVDA and T-Mobile.
[+5] u/Independent-Tree-985: The Peacedeal isnt a real thing. He's been lying about these deal for so long that people aren't even listening to him about it
If that's your bear case, you're in for some hurt
[+5] u/Technical-Emu-32: You should've made the deal 🤝
[+5] u/circadiggmigration: Yeah yeah yeah. Did you ever consider the toll of being a dead beat dad though? We never get no respect.
[+5] u/DataExternal4451: He a delusional ber smoking crack to relieve himself xd
[+21] u/Numerous-Stand-1841: > we've closed the Strait
Market +1%
> we've reopened the Strait
Market +2%
🙂
[+19] u/Sick0h: SPY could drop 30% tomorrow and the bears from the tariff lows would still have missed out on 10% gains lmao
[+17] u/FrostingOk2692: I heard they were gonna sign the Honda Accord. Should be reliable.
[+17] u/Jussttjustin: "The U.S. and Iran are discussing a plan that would open the Strait of Hormuz roughly 30 days after the two sides reach a deal to end hostilities"
Am I to understand that they are DISCUSSING a plan in which the Strait is not opened until 30 days AFTER they agree to stop fighting, which they have not agreed to yet.
And somehow this is bullish.
[+15] u/ChewbaccaIsBear: **Actually, I don´t think the Iranians came up with the ENVIRONMENTAL FEE, I think they said it was straight up non negotiable that they charge a toll, and WE TOLD THEM, let´s just call it AN ENVIRONMENTAL FEE SO THAT OUR SHEEP WILL EAT THAT SHIT AND LIKE IT TOO LIKE THE MOTHERFUCKERS THEY ARE 😄**
[+12] u/Donalds_Lump: My uncle works for the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps and he said that there won’t be any deal.
[+11] u/JPowTheDayTrader: Not a lot of volume today. Prices barely moving.
[+10] u/WhileGoWonder: Aaaand my fridays oil longs got knocked out. Fuck.
[+10] u/gh0st-33: Mods really need to start banning these AI garbage posts, just straight up spam lol
[+10] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: remember kids:
\- due dilligence is for nerds
\- stonks only go up, except for sometimes
\- selling to open AKA hedging your calls is boomer mentality
\- the market gods gave us margin to grow our portfolios faster, when you feel the usual 14-20% market gains arent enough, and are just smart enough to use it
\- the best time to buy calls is right before an earnings event. dont be discouraged if the first few attempts dont go your way. eventually they return big gains
\- if you feel jealous of your peers on wsb for posting signficant gain porn, this is normal and acceptable. most people unaware but this is when you want to buy.
\- inversing your self is smart. except when its not. then the inverse is true 👌🏻
godspeed
[+9] u/bearhunter429: #Every time some "good news" gets posted we pump and pump sustains even when the said good news gets denied later on. This happened with trade talks too LMAO🤌
[+9] u/fan_of_hakiksexydays: Once the war is over, how do I still make money if there's no more TACO or "negotiations going well" to look forward to?
[+9] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: imagine not being leveraged to the absolute tits on memorial day weekend 🦅🇺🇸💰
[+9] u/rootyoot: Inflation so bad, a dolla no longer makes her holla :(
[+9] u/svpa3991: Some of my coworkers who are absolute baddies are picking up second jobs, some uber and some DoorDash. Only a matter of time before OF 🤔
[+9] u/FrostingOk2692: META sucks. This is financial advice.
[+9] u/RepresentativeSea583: Everybody expecting Shrek Tuesday. Not surprised to see you all become exit liquidity for the big boys dumping their bags at ATH
[+8] u/Sick0h: Will the Abraham Accords be as reliable as the Japanese Honda Accords? What does JD Power think?
[+8] u/rocier: just need 10 more million dollars and I'll have 10 million dollars
[+8] u/savemoney_god: Its crazy to think that tomorrow is just going to be a straight rugpull i mean rally for the whole week
[+8] u/unpaid-astroturfer: Everyone is stupid except me
[+8] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: buy calls. zero DD. OTM. Deeeep OTM, that way you can buy 100+ contracts at time 👌🏻. 0-1DTE. Margin exists for a REASON, use it! dont let BIG THETA tell you not to over allocate your portfolio to a fuck ton of positive delta. Hedging is for squares. When you see someone in the chat pumping a stock, BUY IT. act on impulse and emotions mostly. If you fail, try taking out a loan or use your house to gain access to cash. 95% quit right before they win it all back in one play 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻
[+8] u/Swiftnice: There is no deal lol
[+7] u/IamyourfantasyX: Has there ever been a time where market is closed for 7 days. Can you imagine no casino for 7 days
[+7] u/SlickyTrader: We really gonna open at 760 huh
[+7] u/Hearts08: Does the US market reopen today during overnight hours or during premarket hours tomorrow?
[+7] u/DoughnutNo9030: Might be a top signal
[+6] u/newmoneyking: Literally don’t know what to do with my life when the casino is closed.
[+6] u/TopAcanthisitta2972: Bulls will never have taste, class, or a passable sense of humor. Sad state of affairs.
[+6] u/StocksStormTrooper: If Trump gets all the Muslim Middle East countries to sign the Abraham Accord to make peace and normalize relations with Israel… the SPY will go up like 20% in 1 day🚀🚀🚀
[+6] u/Big_Instruction9922: Did 🥭 lower oil over the weekend to long it?
[+6] u/Evander85: +4% tomorrow on spy; +15% on anything AI related
[+6] u/Sufficient-Tie-8735: ASTS is easily passing $130 this week. I’d do a banbet if I didn’t already have it for $150 in June
[+6] u/neverturndownagain: Soon we gonna experience the Most Advanced, greatest and hottest perfectly timed taco Tuesday in history of tacos
[+6] u/el-que-queda: Light a candle🕯️ for the fallen 🌈 🐻
[+6] u/Valkorion335786: What does this mean for my SPY 747C
[+6] u/D1finalboss: Thank you for your attention to this cake batter
[+6] u/sylphvanas: Bulls jizz in bear anoos
[+6] u/Black_Label_36: One bad decision after another I see
[+6] u/Hot_Avocado_2701: A 60 day ceasefire still means nothing right as they will never agree on one aspect of the deal so after those 60 days we’re back to where we are now
[+6] u/TickTockTaudit: Guy at the bar is going to give me an 8 ball of coke for free! And just charge me a reasonable Environmental Fee.
I really feel great about this.
[+6] u/Apollo948: If this shits not neon green tomorrow I’m swinging
[+5] u/stonetrade: 🥭 still sending these two oompa loompas to negotiate for him
[+5] u/dreamer_Neet: So the deal is on or off, i cant keep track of all these fking switches
[+5] u/ListerineInMyPeehole: market moves on "iran talks going well"
much like the 2020s "vaccine talks going well"
[+5] u/PenguinOfB00m: I want to be bols please explain how to be bol
[+5] u/UnknownM007: What time can we buy overnight SPX options tomorrow?
[+5] u/Datsyuk131313: Open the fucking market already I have nothing else to do today other than actually work
[+5] u/brute-forced: 40 billion to Argentina and you can’t even get a cheap steak in Texas?
[+5] u/Old-Wash-3193: Look it up at trading View or something you regard
[+5] u/Thoughtful_Tortoise: Just embrace the lack of oil, calls on horses.
[+5] u/patelchief90: Entire sub is waiting for 6 pm
[+5] u/Fit_Olive_3212: Nokia CEO bought shares now at 15.30 dollars
Edit chief developer* im reading like a ADD guy
[+5] u/TequilaTrader: Gemini is better plus they have a deal to include YouTube light and a ton of cloud
[+5] u/FirstAtEridu: After the GCC, Turkey, China, the EU, the Soviet Union, the Centauri Republic, Ferengi Alliance and Mordor who's left who else needs to be part of the deal? I just want to make some money...
[+5] u/Dangerous-Retard: Yeah, it's not too often that I feel like a real person has been poorly written. The dude's two-dimensional.
[+5] u/Black_Label_36: Funny how my portfolio is green when I don't have US stocks ruining everything
[+5] u/LaserGuy626: He said I'd get tired of winning but I'm still not tired of winning. Not until we're doing 4% a day like S. Korea. Time to ban short selling
[+5] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: Analytically, I’m winning all my trades.
[+5] u/Alymagy96: ASTS up 6.8% on the German market
[+5] u/Dawnoftheman: Is anyone even grilling out today ? I’m sitting in a parking lot listening to music and idk what to do with my life since the market is closed
[+5] u/Loan-Pickle: So looks like we pump tomorrow but Thursday is PCE. Markets are going to freak out again over inflation. Need to figure out my play for the next couple of days.
[+11] u/InitialPsychology731: How is Bibi intensifying the exact thing Iran doesn't want in the middle of negotiations. They really want this deal to blow up among other things huh.
[+11] u/ShrimpieAC: Man, whenever bulls get this confident it makes me pretty nervous
[+10] u/pekas13: The future used to be so cool, but the present is so gay.
[+10] u/-IQ200: Step 1: Have 5 million
Step 2: Park it in 30Y @ 5%
Step 3: Enjoy 250k salary life
[+10] u/savingstrainagain: Bulls salivating at the 127th time a peace deal imminent headline appears
[+9] u/music_is_gud: If this regard only knew Monday was a holiday and bet for Tuesday instead he woulda surely won..
[+8] u/Dat-Boi-6122: I can't wait to make the only move that makes no money tomorrow!
[+8] u/Snoo-90587: I’ve made 160k so far this year it feels unreal
[+8] u/Professional-Tap2052: Most European indices finished up 2% for the day Israel's one finished over 3%. Will be quite embarrassing if SPY doesn't reach those highs.
[+8] u/Taco_muncher_yumyum: I'm a medium term bear but I'm under no illusions that we will close green tomorrow
[+8] u/poopermacho: We need to see Pope Leo's portfolio
[+8] u/MakeResonableChoices: Alright this has been long enough, open the casino 🎰
[+8] u/lack0fcommonsense: I saw Elon Musk at a CVS at like 11:36pm on a Tuesday. He was in the greeting card aisle for a very long time. Not reading the cards, just standing near them with his arms crossed like he was supervising. At one point he picked one up, read it, and put it back facing the wrong way. He did this to seventeen cards. A CVS employee asked if he needed help and he said "I'm good" in a way that ended the conversation permanently.
He got in line behind me with nothing in his hands. Just got in line. When he got to the register the cashier asked if he found everything okay and he said "that's a great question" and then didn't answer it. He tapped his card before she'd even told him the total. It worked.
As I was leaving, I saw him hold the door open for "me" even though I was way behind him. But let go as soon as I got close
[+8] u/Thisispaartaaa: American's realizing that the NYSE is not the only stock market on the planet, and that it's fairly easy to buy US equities on the Canadian stock exchanges....If you are able to get some shares today, before the masses start buying tomorrow, you are 1 day ahead of the pack bud!
[+7] u/kryptonyk: Will overnight market start tonight at 8?
[+7] u/Pale-Silver-8178: Stonks will open at +5% on the overnight market in 5 hours
[+7] u/madhewprague: Stupid bols, get ready for tuesday crash. Its going to open -5% market does not hate anything more than uncertainty. Lol its going to crash so hard…. I was so lucky i loaded on puts on friday, after long time i was finally right, there is not going to be any deal and the market will finally crash.
[+7] u/LadderAdmirable: 0.5-1% gap up will get faded tomorrow itself. Need confirmation of the deal and a 2-3% shrek gap up by tomorrow morning to get out of this range for real.
[+6] u/NotMe357: No matter if the stock market is up or down tomorrow. All I know my stock will be flat or down 😔 😟 🙁
[+6] u/SpyBagholder: Part of the Space X filing was a portion that showed they bought 128 million of recalled cybertrucks. What does this company actually do besides starlink lmao
[+6] u/NotMe357: If you see it on the news then is probably too late or fake news.
[+5] u/Sharp-Direction-6894: Do you ever write a 🤡 comment and some 🔥 copies it wrong?
[+5] u/marsrobotcs: How do I convert my shit coins into revenue generating assets? 😭
[+5] u/Vegetable-Lemon6669: Just passed my series 7
[+5] u/SpyBagholder: Seems like I see more news about big investors or funds starting to reverse course on AI. Maybe the 1.4 trillion build out wasn’t the best idea.
[+5] u/InIce1234: New week, new ATH.
Easy for Bull.
[+5] u/Psychological_Fly109: New apollo mission has been announced to take photos of tomorrows green candle
[+5] u/31andnotdone: people i need:
no one
[+5] u/bosco2110: Huge green spy candle on hyperliquid 🤓
[+5] u/damarian_ent: Try unplugging it and putting it back in
[+5] u/Specific-Path3179: will lmt go up or down tomorrow
[+5] u/jerm2z: Do you ever write a 🤡 comment and some other 🤡 copies it?
[+5] u/Reid-Hoffman: Puts on oil, calls on nuclear?
[+5] u/daisymoth9: oil drilling but it’ll go right back up eow
[+5] u/pmotiveforce: Gullibulls still ranting and raving I see.
[+5] u/iBoughtYourCar: Came back to my car and I have a “warning citation” for windshield tint and no front plate lmao bruh
[+5] u/AirportMaterial5917: Ok what did rddt do to their app now
[+5] u/crazyeugene: Today I realized how depressing life is when you can't lose money on 0dte calls!!
[+5] u/asetniop: Nothing against the guy personally, but he honestly seems like one of the dumbest players in the NBA.
[+5] u/Bleeding_Hemroid: Does nvda bump back up on non-related news?
[+5] u/Cramer4President: Do you ever write a 🔥 comment and some 🤡 copies it?
[+5] u/music_is_gud: Weekend futes being lit 🔥
[+5] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: TP tore and now I have a *surprise* in my hand🫴💩
[+5] u/VIPDeluxeTendies: OPEN THE FUCKING CASINO
[+5] u/Postmodern_Pastiche: Bears are their mother’s least favorite child
[+5] u/Advanced_Divide_4641: “Please verify your ticket. This is the final boarding for this rocket station”
[+5] u/cgonz15: Ever wonder why they call it bear and bull market?
Ber attack downwards = bear market
Bol attack upwards = bull market
Thanks finance teacher in 9th grade