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[+43] u/MrBlueEyedFox: 🥭 during market hours: "we are winning, they are weak and under our control."
Weekend 🥭: "everything's falling apart, its chaos, we might have to nuke holy fuk!"
5 minutes before market hours 🥭: "theres a possible deal. Good time to buy stonks."
[+32] u/Peimai: Futures are 100% opening red but will we be green by eod tomorrow. Probably. 🙃
[+31] u/Ravenous-Hydrant: SPY 680 open, 730 EOD
[+31] u/bendraw: US just seized an Iranian ship. Ww3 is back on the menu.
[+22] u/31andnotdone: these cant possibly be the same knees i had in the 2000's
[+22] u/-Wisefool69-: Irans got 🥭 by the bussy
[+21] u/WickedFrags: Bers on ASTS about to eat good tomorrow
[+21] u/xeuropa: Breaking: US navy hit and seized Iranian cargo ship trying to leave strait of Hormuz
[+20] u/bishke1: !banbet ASTS -25% 1d
[+18] u/Moepenmoes: CASH GANG CHECKING IN, NO WORRIES ABOUT TOMORROW
[+17] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: Breaking News: Bears will now be in control of this market. Thank you for your attention to this matter 🤌🐻
[+17] u/xeemyy: Hahahaha I’m going to lose so much money tomorrow hahahaha
[+17] u/rukasteam: So the market went up 12% because the strait was reopening and war was coming to an end.
So therefore since the strait is closed and the war is escalating again, we should buy calls.
[+15] u/Normal_Finance_3083: #BEARS ASSEMBLE TIME HAS COME....
[+15] u/sanndman: what weekends used to be:
-yay time off from school
-TV, video games, FUN
what weekends are now:
-kids have time off from school, FUCK
-markets closed, FUCK
-all family at home to spend time with, FUCK
[+14] u/CheapHero91: dear god of the stock market, i want to reverse one or two trades i made on friday in the light of recent developments 🤡
[+14] u/Loud-Television1271: CASH gang for the last week. Feels good, not looking at markets every second and reading every one of your comments. I’ll enjoy the 3.27% yield. I’ll fomo in soon enough or when there’s any crash.
[+14] u/Camusknuckle: Today is WSB at its peak. Both bulls and bears are being condescending pricks thinking they have the upper hand. Meanwhile, big banks are recording record trading profits.
[+14] u/bearhunter429: #These days kids use AI in their tests and exams at school and their professors use AI to create course material and grade them. Then kids graduate and use AI to generate a resume to apply to a job posting which is also generated by AI. Then their resume gets judged against job posting using AI software. Then they get hired and use AI to do their job.
#LMAO🤌
[+14] u/avdvetf: Both eyeran and mango have realized they can continue this deal-no-deal dance going indefinitely and keep profiting off insider trading on the markets.
Infinite money glitch.
[+14] u/Maximum-Magazine-333: Opens Reddit app
“Wonder what the experts think”
Opens daily thread
[+13] u/Czyzzle: I feel like, maybe, Trump doesn't always tell the truth
[+13] u/FeverTreeCloud: NYT: Iran 🇮🇷 says no talks are scheduled or planned, contrary to what 🌮 said
[+13] u/Visible_Dinner_7764: Can we just admit that maybe Hormuz isn’t as straight as we once thought it was
[+13] u/Oneok-Field: Business proposal, here me out:
Steak is getting dumb expensive. I saw it at $15/lb for a crappy ribeye cut the other day.
But you know what's stayed at the same price these past few months? Jerky.
Jerky is 1:3 yield to steak. So 1 pound of steak makes 1/3rd pound jerky.
What we do is buy cheap jerky. *RE*hydrate it by soaking it in water all night, then sell it as regular steak at premium prices.
Who's in?
Also PUTS on BF.B
[+13] u/spellbadgrammargood: Imagine believing Trump is a reliable source.
[+13] u/bearhunter429: #Isn't it amazing it takes exactly 4 years to get any college degree? It takes the same amount of time to teach someone Computer Science and Art History LMAO🤌
[+13] u/bearhunter429: >Washington Post: Students are speeding through their online degrees in weeks, alarming educators. Some online colleges allow students to take unlimited courses on their own time, leading to quick degrees and worries about devaluing credentials.
#ChatGPT making things easier LMAO🤌
[+13] u/uncsucks: 65 minutes until life has meaning again
[+12] u/JohanLiebert92: So the US is just gonna make a deal with themselves in Pakistan? Iran ain't even turning up lmao
[+12] u/Fit_Neighborhood9251: Izrael restarts Gaza war.
If orango stops it again, do we count it as 2 stopped gaza wars?
[+12] u/RonBlake: @realDonaldTrump TruthSocial Monday 4/20/26 9:25 am ET: “After tough negotiations with the Iranians, who are very reasonable, I have decided to allow their oil tanker to pass. They don’t want this “oil” to “spill” over into more death and destruction. Smart! Thank you for your attention to this matter!”
[+11] u/Czyzzle: When he seriously proposed dropping a nuke on a hurricane is when I knew
[+11] u/twostroke1: My moves for tomorrow is to say “LMAO BEARS” a few dozen times in the daily.
[+11] u/No_Celery5992: War restart + rocket fail. ASTS back to 40
[+11] u/lordricer: 720 tomorrow fuck your feelings
[+11] u/Most-Crazy2353: When has he ever not tacod?
[+11] u/avdvetf: It is time.
China, release the bats.
[+11] u/Pazzaaaaaa: The market pumping gave mango the green light to escalate this war, we are so fucked.
[+11] u/netflix-ceo: Lol
Iranian forces thwarted US attempt to seize Iranian commercial ship, state-linked media says
[+11] u/blockchainkitty: WHY IS EVERYONE SCARED??? THIS IS THE CANTILLON EFFECT THE FED PRINTS MONEY 🖨️💸, BANKS GET IT FIRST AND BUY ASSETS 🚀📈, SO PRICES GO UP. THEN BIG COMPANIES GET CHEAP LOANS AND KEEP GROWING. RICH PEOPLE GET RICHER 💎, WHILE REGULAR PEOPLE JUST PAY MORE FOR EVERYTHING AND GET LEFT BEHIND 🤡💀 BRRRR 🖨️💸
[+11] u/Commercial-District1: If you’re just joining us, we’d like to remind you, **everyone is lying.** Enjoy your evening.
[+10] u/AdCritical5383: Orange man is fookin’ nuts. What a social post. 😂
[+10] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: I waant to thank every bull that bought the dip and pumped the market. It gave me the opportunity to buy cheap put. 😍😘😘😘😘🐻
[+10] u/Independent-Tree-985: Can you believe somebody downvoted my penis comment?
WSB just aint the same these days
[+10] u/NewDawn101: This whole Iran thing is a circus now
[+10] u/cheweyy: This seems like a repeat of last week
[+10] u/killainvest: Don’t let bad presidential AI photos distract you from the fact that Hector is going to be running three Honda civics with spoon engines, and on top of that, he just went into Harry’s and bought three t66 turbos with nos, and a motec exhaust system.
[+10] u/Ok_Worldliness_2902: Obviously puts. So calls will print
[+10] u/music_is_gud: It's suspiciously bullish here. I'm scared (as a bol)
[+10] u/Moepenmoes: Smells like ber in here, show yourself
[+9] u/SomePolack: Tomorrow bers eating ribeye
[+9] u/jonneh: 🚨 **The U.S. has seized an Iranian ship that tried to avoid the blockade**
> 🥭: The Iranian crew refused to listen, so our Navy ship stopped them right in their tracks by blowing a hole in the engineroom.
[+9] u/SuperNewk: Nbis under 100 tomorrow?!? It’s happening
[+9] u/MasterElite1: >UAE ASKS US FOR A WARTIME FINANCIAL LIFELINE: WSJ
Printer go brrrrr
[+9] u/ShittyUsernane1222: 🥭 is too busy fighting with Iran while China has found a second oil supplier in form of Turkmenistan.
🥭 is playing checkers.
china is playing chess.
[+9] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: The real estate developer from Queens is doing real estate developer from Queens things
[+9] u/Necessary_Ad_9800: 1 hour 20 min until life has meaning again
[+9] u/Philthatman: BREAKING: ATLANTIS HAS OFFICIALLY DECLARED A BLOCKADE OF BOTH IRANIAN AND AMERICAN SHIPS. SOVEREIGN OF THE SEA: KING ATLAN HAS SEIZED YOUR OPTIONS
[+9] u/Wrath_FMA: Lmao we are attacking ships now
[+9] u/Able_Durian_1832: Tomorrow maybe little red, but it has to turn green soon
[+9] u/HalaMadridPapaFlo: LMAO bers in shambles
[+9] u/AngusMcTibbins: MSFT will keep pumping tmrw.
[+8] u/No-Can-80085: I’m so fucked guys i took out a 70k loan
[+8] u/clubdirthill: Iran is leaving 🥭 on read and calls are going straight to voicemail
[+8] u/ShittyUsernane1222: SPY 420 is more likely than SPY 900
[+8] u/MoistAction9580: Finna change it to the Straight of America
[+8] u/Chitownguy06: This is gonna be an exciting week. Let’s slap some ass boys!
😎👋💥🍑
[+8] u/BigBasedGrifter69: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+8] u/WingedScapula420: Futures will probably be blood red and then inexplicably new ATH by EOD.
[+8] u/jijitalk: STFU BEAR.
Sorry, practicing for tomorrow.
[+8] u/Arya_Warrior_Girl: Anyone else bought/is buying NFLX after the drop?
[+8] u/claytondpark: Rotation into nflx Monday?
[+8] u/Axonum: RED FUTES GREEN BY OPEN
[+8] u/Maximum-Cash7103: Going bigly green tomorrow
[+7] u/Kickboy21: Bulls are fucked tomorrow
[+7] u/FiefKief: Feels pretty bad after getting stopped out of oil long on Friday
[+7] u/ThePokemon_BandaiD: Pray that my USO calls recover 🙏 Praise be to Allah
[+7] u/Off_Duty_Machete: Iran ship go boom boom, peace talks in the morning, strait open by market close. 🔁😂
[+7] u/Bene_observari: US Marines have taken custody of an Iranian flagged vessel in the straight.
[+7] u/yushey__: Imagine thinking buying calls at ATH was a good idea. Bols are regarded
[+7] u/Actual_Difference617: This was some serious conditioning last few weeks. Look at people ready to buy calls if we open red.
[+7] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: Black monday tomorow! Dont forget to spam dancing bears 🐻🐻🐻🐻
[+7] u/Fun-Valuable-7355: we live in a society
[+7] u/claytondpark: I was hoping for a Monday pump to load some spx puts, but looks like the mkt manipulators may not give me the chance
[+7] u/SlartibartfastMcGee: The market moved on from Iran 3 weeks ago and you guys are all too stupid to realize it.
[+7] u/jonneh: > According to IRNA, claims of a second round of talks in Islamabad are inaccurate.
[+7] u/RockasaurusRex: The 2020 market recovery happened while bad news about covid was still coming out. I was one of the people who thought that there was going to be a 2nd crash, but we just kept moving on to new ATHs.
[+7] u/OK_Computer10101: I heard the ship they seized has a giant golden horse onboard that 🥭wants delivered to the White House
[+7] u/KittyLover-7: Guys I need to confess, I’m so fixated on my hood app Monday to Friday my employer is basically paying me to not work and lose money instead and basically funding this vicious cycle
THIS is peak life
[+7] u/Emilio___Molestevez: try to imagine something more bullish than torpedofucking an enemy ship
now imagine bers thinking that's not awesome
[+7] u/Fancy_Cattle_5914: Cant wait to see ASTS crash and the spacecucks crying over a 10% dip, after being up over 4,000% in 2 years
[+7] u/RonBlake: Weekday: Donald Pump
Weekend: Donald Dump
[+7] u/SadDevelopment3049: Believe it or not, calls.
[+7] u/neotank35: guessing the failed asts launch is a nothing burger and it stays flat or green.
[+7] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Lol I’ve been on this subreddit when it was at 30k subs and never seen so much divide in the comments for like what’s going to happen
[+7] u/avdvetf: TACO is guaranteed. The A is for Always, not Sometimes.
Eyeran has mango by the balls
[+6] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: Bolls about to get a generational red light therapy 🤌😘
[+6] u/DingleJingle_: The market is definitely going to learn mango is an idiot this time right?
[+6] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: This place is really full of regards!! I feel at home
[+6] u/Swimming-Plane-1610: Daddy Trump is gonna say something right before the market opens and it will shoot up. Ride the manipulation.
[+6] u/FeverTreeCloud: NPR: US Negotiators prepare for more peace talks after 🌮 repeats threats to Iran 🇮🇷
At this point, 🌮 is just trolling because he’s mad that Iranian government’s trolling tweets are better than his trolling 😤
[+6] u/Antique_Cabinet8416: imagine buying calls after the needle top lmfao get spittooned bulls
[+6] u/ShittyUsernane1222: 🥭 is too busy doing ww3.
the TACO shop is closed.
[+6] u/XorAndNot: Gerarional wealth buying opportunity on ASTS tomorrow.
[+6] u/Legitimate-Ant6838: Tomorrow red day with the breaking news that happen with the deal being broke
[+6] u/SomePolack: Bols so fucked LMAO
👌🏻
[+6] u/undocumented_twerker: Same thing I do every Monday. Buy. More. Calls.
[+6] u/Bam2458: As a resident bull I’d be more concerned if futes opened green at this point
[+6] u/dreamer_Neet: We are living in groundhog days
[+6] u/cobalt4: Why even discuss what our moves tomorrow will be when we will all be completely wrong
[+6] u/ImHungryAsFuck: I know what’s going to happen tomorrow but I just don’t feel like explaining it.
[+6] u/OkResponsibility2470: I sold puts on ASTS FAWWK
[+6] u/Informal_Math_7853: I swear my girl is gonna kill me one day 😂
latinas don’t play
[+6] u/Actual_Difference617: Does US even needs Iran at the talks? Lol
[+6] u/RoastedPeanuts1812: So many bears, SPY is going to open +0.63% just cause
[+6] u/Pete26l96: Bers talking about feeling bad for bols while market is at an ath 🤣😂🤣😂
These 🌈🐻🤡s are something else
[+6] u/zerowaitestate: What is oil? A miserable little pile of secrets.
[+6] u/bearhunter429: #We already had like 15 green days in a row so we'll have a couple red days just as combo-breaker before we go back to pumping LMAO🤌
[+6] u/twostroke1: Too many bears in here means we still have a ways to go before the market reaches euphoria.
[+6] u/DeezSpicyNuts: Broheem you gotta come with me to Skylar’s house after we get burritos he’s got this new three perc bong that just fuckin’ chooches and we need something to fire up these crispy nugs
[+6] u/drytexterfinalboss: Measure twice, cut never
[+6] u/killcon84: It's OK orange will taco out of the war, we can ignore the enemy in the war and technically we will achieve a historic peace
[+6] u/Infinite-Anybody204: Have yall seen Trumps ass? Massive dumpy
[+6] u/Joey-Cap: The 60 minute run up to futures open is now beginning, please ensure you bring your best regarded comments to this sub
[+6] u/matias-: Opens at -0.13% closes up 1.45%
[+6] u/No_Current3675: We gonna get a bunch of unhinged tweets from the 🥭 fucktard tonight?
[+6] u/Drlitez: Weird thought it was dead bols
[+6] u/VisualMod: **Ban Bet Created:** **/u/Pazzaaaaaa** bet **SPY** goes from **710.76** to **680.0** before **25-Apr-2026 05:05 PM EDT**
Their record is 0 wins and 5 losses.
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+6] u/Altruistic_Gap_8494: Seen that movie too many times
[+5] u/sanndman: "Israeli strike kills child in Gaza."
literally an update on al jazeera on the iran war from an hour ago. jesus christ. or akbar, whatever.
[+5] u/swallowsnest87: Europe bouta run outa gas
[+5] u/ziggs_ulted_japan: Oh God. We're going to tank tomorrow
[+5] u/Everyday_gilbert: How are futes going to look
[+5] u/team-fyi: Do tears count as liquidity?
[+5] u/yushey__: Put the bag in the fries
[+5] u/RoccoFb: The straight of hormuz is just playing hard to get
[+5] u/nesnayu: Way too bearish in here. Like everyday last 13 days. Huge LOL. We know what to do
[+5] u/DatsMaPurse_IDKU: Whatever you’re thinking is already priced in 👁️👁️
[+5] u/RoundMammoth2947: We really should have seen circuit breakers in the last two months. But I have to be a responsible bear and sit this one out. Glad everyone made tons of money because a liar lies.
[+5] u/Star_Lord924: Calls on MRVL at open.
[+5] u/Antique_Cabinet8416: "According to OpenAI's internal metrics, 630,000 weekly users now show signs of psychosis or mania" no wonder bulls have completely lost their marbles
[+5] u/wyudtix: Copium son or FUD daughter ?
[+5] u/MusingsAndMind: **OPEN THE FUCKING CASINOOOOOOOOOOO**
[+5] u/Purple_Bearkat: Watch it pump, dump or something in between.
[+5] u/betaforever: Please god open USO at 130
[+5] u/ButterRollercoaster: Negotiations going well
[+5] u/theregalbeagler: On top of the ASTS shit pile, confirmed no batch shipping on April by Abel himself 🤣
[+5] u/ZealousidealSector19: Tomorrow is the Catalina Wine Mixer and we ride!
[+5] u/mr_stupid_face: We need PDiddy to release the reserves!
[+5] u/SnoStrm: Another one of those nights coming where I get to feel like a genius for being in cash and then a retard at open after the shrek candle. Good times.
[+5] u/Assketchum1: Hi, I'm a Bear, and I work at Wendy's, a day in the life of serving fries and trading fries is hard, but honest work. AND one day, one day, one of these paychecks, one of these tranches of SPY puts will set me free. But until that day, would you like your fries salted or no salt?
[+5] u/FabulousLanguage6216: Be fearful when others are greedy
[+5] u/Madsen13140: Bers assembling hoping for the end of the world.How pathetic.
[+5] u/Candid_Payment_4094: The IRGC seems to be fractured on whether to negotiate and sign a peace treaty. Believe it or not, it’s quite bullish in the long run since they will be infighting. Good ‘ol Abe said: “A house divided against itself cannot stand. SPY 750C 24/4 degenerates”
[+5] u/claytondpark: "My colleague Kate Clark and I reported this week that Altman has recently tried to use OpenAI to back two of his own portfolio companies that have no immediate benefit to the ChatGPT-maker."
"Despite his many, many shares in companies in fields ranging from chip companies to rockets, he owns zero shares in OpenAI, the company he leads."
https://www.wsj.com/tech/ai/altmans-personal-investments-4ca4e64d
Just another scammer trying to take as much of the public's money as possible...
[+5] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Lost
/u/Ancient_Let7878 made a bet that NVDA would go to 162.0 within **2 weeks** when it was 176.684 and it did not, so they were banned for a week.
Their record is now 0 wins and 1 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+5] u/Moepenmoes: Now that we have 2 parties blocking the strait, could we get a 3rd party to block the blockade's blockade?
[+5] u/Senior_Professional4: is he physically incapable of doing something bullish on a sunday afternoon
[+5] u/Ok_Winner9825: Am thinking asts won’t even drop too much
[+5] u/Icommandyou: Looks like we got concept of a deal before futures open
[+5] u/ithastogoupfromhere: oil market opens in one hour
[+5] u/poopieuser909: believe it or not, calls
[+15] u/Sober_Alcoholic_: Considering how insanely bearish it was in here before market close on Friday (and still is) and put to call ratios are still 2:1, it will probably pump again.
Market is seemingly running on put premiums.
[+15] u/According-Page8618: "LMAO BULLS" after we start -1,5%
"BEARS GETTING SWEATY " after we recover to -0,8% in 1 hour
"LMFAO BERS " on open after its flat
[+13] u/skychief99: The Pentagon Pizza indicator is off the charts. They're running outta cheese!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[+13] u/CasualPersistence: So what you’re telling me is, face-ripping green tomorrow?
[+13] u/cbusoh66: I am betting on one or more fake Bloomberg headlines tomorrow...
- Trump Tells Aides He is Not Considering Boarding or Stopping any Additional Iranian Ships
- Trump Signals Willingness to Reconsider Blockade Actions
- Iran Signals Willingness to Attend Talks in Islamabad
SPY +3%
[+12] u/patricktu1258: Imagine beingthe POTUS, the most famous, privileged, influential, and powerful person in the world, and all you think about is manipulating market and shouting nonsense on temu twitter.
[+12] u/pseudo_rockstar: Peace deal at 9:20 and rally to spy 720
[+11] u/Comfortable733: Pants shitter and couch fucker, name a better duo
[+10] u/GodLevelRedditor: Update: you can NOT pay a margin call with EBT
[+10] u/Flat-Focus7966: "Bulls in shambles"
"Bears really thought"
One of these is going to appear ad nauseam here tomorrow
[+10] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: Bears are about to count a pullback to SPY 700 as a win lmao
[+10] u/TrumpChildOnahole: Lmao this is gonna be solid green at open easy
[+9] u/Odd-Block-2998: Barron to his dad: I sold calls for 3,000% profit last Friday. Thank you for the tip!
His dad: Got it, time to resume military exercises.
[+9] u/Middle_Heat_8985: BREAKING NEWS - Iranian strategic affairs expert Muhammad Murandi says "There is a possibility that we could face an attack tonight, and we do not believe that Washington is committed to a specific deadline for a ceasefire"
[+9] u/DeerCum: LMAOO BEARS!!! (Practicing for later tonight)
[+9] u/PushAble2463: Hormuz open by open. This message was delivered by openAI
[+8] u/WonUpH: Bears gonna wake up like the undertaker tomorrow morning
[+8] u/EscapeHistorical178: We gonna gap down in 25 minutes aren't we.
[+8] u/gentlesandwich: I just remembered why I don't hold weekend options. I keep wanting to check like I have a phantom limb or something. I'm waiting for futures to get a morsel of news. Fuck this.
[+8] u/Suavecore_: If Twitter and Truth social are any indication of how world leaders communicate, the human race is doomed
[+8] u/Prestigious_Way_738: Y'all expecting a very red Monday are going to be very dissapointed.
At WORST we are down 1.5%. More than likely we'll be down .5% or even.
[+7] u/BeginnersDuck777: 🚨 CIRCUIT BREAKERS 🚨
[+7] u/yaboyay: Overly bullish in here, all bers getting downvoted, bols are hoping 🥭 tacos for the 15th day in a row. You know what that means! !banbet SPY 700 22h
[+7] u/Top-Sir-1215: I really want to see a true sell off, the kind where I open my port and see -10 percent across the board. I want to see comments about people regretting buying the dip on msft and Adobe, Nvidia going back below 100 etc
[+7] u/Mr_Worst_Timing: This has been the most confusing war
[+7] u/Total_Schedule592: Step 1, notice the markets rigged. Step 2, use it to advantage
[+7] u/A10cc: OPEN THE FUCKING CASINO
[+7] u/Mikeyboi337: All of you looking for a sell off are experiencing fomo
[+7] u/ebfeebfe: An american destroyer shot up a tanker that tried to run the blockade today. So as you can, the strait is open and everybody is having a great time!
[+7] u/Total_Schedule592: Hi everybody, I'll start us out for the week here, ber r fuk
[+7] u/Kind_Initiative_7567: BER really thot lmaoo (practicing for later)
[+7] u/According-Page8618: oil will be like +8% and spy recover from -1,5% to +0,1%
take it or leave it
[+7] u/trollboter: The bears never learn.
[+6] u/sadguy__: How many bulls bought at the top on friday only to become exit liquidity this week? We should find out soon 🤝🏼
[+6] u/MayorMcCheezz: The US boarded and seized its first Iranian ship today. Very bullish.
[+6] u/Hang_Man1: Man I won't believe shit til I see how the market opens tomorrow. Futes were -1% last wkend and look how that turned out
[+6] u/rubsdikonxpensivshit: If Iran gets impatient and hits some of the helium plants across the strait semis are gonna take a huge hit. May even get a circuit breaker with that combined with everything else rn
[+6] u/14X8000m: The best move for tomorrow is to locate the juiciest Wendy's dumpster and camp out early, undercutting any competition.
[+6] u/BiggieMoe01: Blue Origin not saying a WORD about how they failed to complete their ASTS customer’s objectives and are still glazing themselves about catching the booster fuck that company and fuck Bezos LMAO. No one is going to trust them for launches. SpaceX wins this.
[+6] u/KahlVados: What's the difference between a ship seizure and piracy?
[+6] u/elbalti77: If we open less than -1% we going green my AM
[+6] u/tessie_trades: staying away from puts . ive alwsys been a bull,tried being a bear and almost lost it all
[+6] u/TheRealJohnOptions: just tried cane's for the first time and we really need a new slur for things this mid
[+5] u/SuspiciousHumor7127: Funny to think SPY opening at 700 used to be a positive thing, now it would be a negative
[+5] u/Bxdwfl: these 6000 shares of tqqq arent feeling as good as they were on friday
[+5] u/skychief99: Unfortunately.....about to drill much deeper than the March lows. Mariana Trench Deep.
[+5] u/Legendary-Lemon: Who of you dumbols held calls over the weekend?
[+5] u/Zestyclose_Raisin459: Prediction markets showing 63% chance wti price hits $91 or above tomorrow…
[+5] u/kazkeb: Did the US Navy shoot a hole in the side of shitcoin too?
[+5] u/No-Put2311: Last week was to hunt out all ber resistance it’s time to drill this week
[+5] u/jrod259: It’s too the point I feel like SGOV is even too risky
[+5] u/Different_Being368: So you want me to believe that Besos bought gsat and then asts satelite carried on blueorigin did not make it to the orbit by accident? Right, gg everybody.
[+5] u/Suavecore_: Remember that next time 🥭 orchestrates a market crash, it will begin to recover immediately and not stop until it hits a new ATH
[+5] u/SuffiecientSapian: Just go ahead and show the futures so I know how many inches I have to prep to take
[+5] u/Total_Schedule592: It takes war to get old men hard
[+5] u/All_FIREdUp: My name is Harry Dresden. OPEN THE FUCKING FUTURES
[+5] u/Significant_Speed854: Market may hit correction territory and touch 700.
[+5] u/speakerbox123456789: Gamble on some penny shroom stocks
[+5] u/1-800-FunkMaster: Green Monday, red Tuesday. As always
[+5] u/RollofDuctTape: Man the movie about this administration is going to be a comedy, isn’t it?
[+5] u/ir1shman: I’m doing whatever 🥭 truths lol when the market is this cooked there is no point in fighting it because you think some economic data point or company fundamental shows otherwise.
[+5] u/illbebahk: Who cares about a war its tech earnings in a week
[+5] u/Total_Schedule592: Bet there's another temporary deal announced Monday evening
[+5] u/brillrededm: Last Friday was supposed be red turn out be green it fck me so hard
[+5] u/Distinct_Chard3048: Looks like another green week. 760 eow
[+5] u/No_Economist3815: Believe it or not......
[+5] u/kodaksdad2020: Bears don’t have the gumption
Calls
[+5] u/RougarouGumbo: Red tonight green tomorrow…again
[+5] u/sixtheperfectnumber: Pivoting to making wool shoes
[+5] u/BagHoldersOfAmerica: Get in and out fast then buy in again later
[+21] u/GoZukkYourself: Red futes on a Sunday night is generally the highlight of the week for bers, outside of showing off their new fedora to their thirteen cats.
[+20] u/GoZukkYourself: Strait will be open at 9:29:59 tomorrow morning.
[+20] u/Derpy_Mc_Burpy: Spy futures already down 0.80%. We're gonna be so green tomorrow
[+19] u/GreenGameboyColor: Unless futures are -5% minimum, this is nothing
Green by open, ATH by lunch 🥱
[+17] u/Ok_Wealth_3433: Already clicked the eye icon to hide my balance in advance
[+17] u/PompeiiSketches: War off: SPY +8%
War On: SPY -0.03%
War off: SPY +3%
War on: SPY -0.2%
SPY +2% EOW.
STOCKS. ONLY. GO. UP.
[+17] u/ConstantSpace5809: Israeli jets heading to Iran. SPY +8%!!
[+15] u/SSMST: OPEN THE FUCKING CASINO!!! NO MORE MR. NICE GUY!!!
[+15] u/ginkokouki: nothing will happen spy 800 eow
[+15] u/Seju11: Bull this bear this, we are all in the same sinking ship u fuckers
[+15] u/hermeskino715: Like roaches, already buying the fucking dip lol
[+14] u/LossMax: Last Sunday was also -1% and we had the greatest rally of all time
[+14] u/cannythecat: Escalation of the war: - 0.7 percent.
Ceasefire a few days later extended: + 4 percent
[+13] u/LumpyShock9656: Not even a 1% drawdown? That's it bers? Even more pathetic than I thought.
[+12] u/whatsagoinon1: Does anyone else hate the constant bulls and bears comments. Shit pisses me off everytime. So gay.
[+11] u/rlockset9: Green by open... I seen this one before.
[+11] u/bandofshepherds: And there you have it folks. +1% eod tomorrow minimum
[+11] u/Bustincherry: Can't wait for the 7am tweet that Iran has a agreed to a deal, but there are no details yet
[+11] u/InformalMeal9828: Bers vomiting looking at 🌽 rn
[+11] u/sck178: -.8% means nothing until market open. And even then... My little bear heart just can't take it anymore
[+11] u/oldprecision: <-1%? Bears you know how this ends tomorrow.
[+11] u/ProudPeak3570: claude is already writing the 8am tweet
[+10] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: lord a -4% QQQ day would flush out all the diseased bulls
[+10] u/Psychological_Fly109: Fake ceasefire and a naval blockade: 12%
Broken ceasefire, double closure of the strait: -0.8%
[+10] u/streetbets7: Spy 720 by opening peace talks again Monday morning
[+10] u/ProfessorAkaliOnYT: we're going green in under 2 hours
[+10] u/Worried_Quarter469: 🥭 made a peace treaty with a girl that goes to another school
[+10] u/looool_k_libtard: AHHHHHH NASDAQ -28% LMAO ADIOS BULLSACKS
[+10] u/IntrepidToday0: 0.5% red overnight for Iran war escalation.
2% green after Trump’s Monday morning tweet
Bers fucked again like clockwork
[+10] u/astromouse2024: So calls either way tomorrow
[+10] u/DaddyFatSacks96: I already did, the key for me was to start with half a mil
[+9] u/Burger_Gouger: I’m hoping goes red tomorrow and all week so these daily threads actually gets some originality back instead of “ber gey” regurgitated 10000 times differently
[+9] u/Exact_Entrepreneur66: Latest X/twitter post from Iranian Parliament Speaker MB Ghalibaf (this guy seems like turning into an actual quant from a politician):
Vibe-trading digital oil is like vibe-hedging in treasuries during Hormuz risk-off. Both share one house of cards that works on paper.
Difference: oil at least has Dated Brent. Treasuries? Vibes all the way down.
EUCRBRDT Index GP <GO>
[+9] u/Drchubbypanda: Only room temperature IQ folks go to Coachella
[+9] u/Alpha_Who: NVDA to 210 by Wednesday
[+9] u/CPA-hole: 9 minutes until my life has meaning again
[+9] u/d33p7r0ubl3: Too many happy bears. Means we’re opening green
[+9] u/trust_it_bb: > **BREAKING:** CEO of SPY blockading the strait of regards, only bulls allowed to pass - bears will be shot on sight.
[+9] u/LimitIntelligent9946: Oil should be $150/bbl but it’s not because markets just gobble up orangutan in chiefs tweets 🤡
[+9] u/Nagalavonpelt: When this shit goes pop it’s going to be epic 😂
The straight has been closed for 8 weeks, no matter how many tweets the mango puts out, he can’t shit oil
SPY buys his bullshit every week, it’s gunna take cars with no fuel outside wall street before the penny drops at this rate
Sat in cash earning 3.8 percent am not dealing with this psycho market
[+9] u/Vegetable-Lemon6669: I’m pretty sure futures opened the same last Sunday , and look at how the week turned out
[+9] u/Psychological_Fly109: I have seen this before, green by open
[+9] u/Visible_Ad6287: Lol as if futes matter new ath easily tomorrow
[+9] u/baadllama_ghost: surprised to see red at all tbh
anyway, green by open 🥱
[+9] u/lostinspacs: Already recovering 😂
[+9] u/NotMe357: Admit it, Bear don't trust this red and bull is ready to buy the dips.
[+8] u/LasyKuuga: Imagine learning about this war in the future.
Straight open Straight close Straight open Straight Close
War on War Off War on War off War on War off
Good luck remembering all that nerds
[+8] u/VacationLover1: Some of you would have made more this year by putting your money in a Chase Saving Account.. smells like a bunch of poors in here
[+8] u/ConstantAd1: >Reports of significant activity by Israeli fighter jets tonight over Southern Syria.
it's all kicking off now
[+8] u/DefiantDelta: Palantir calling for the draft and Palantards are like “exactly, draft them!! surely *I* would never be included in that”
[+8] u/_ThisDickAintFree_: Bulls should go all in on 0DTEs as soon as that bell rings.
[+8] u/CEOofBeanz: Never take it for granted, we live in the country which controls the world’s finances. Forget the UK/London, forget Swiss banks for the ultra wealthy, the buck stops at Wall Street and the Fed
[+8] u/Thoughtful_Tortoise: You all know the drill, right? We open -0.68, go down to -1.4 overnight, back up to -0.6 just before open and then pump from 10am onwards.
[+8] u/cannythecat: Bers were expecting a circuit breaker and got -1 percent.
[+8] u/kadams2121: Futures down to levels we haven’t seen since Friday morning!!!
[+8] u/tomato232: RDDT $450, ORCL $500, MSFT $800 EOY 🚀🚀🚀
[+8] u/fromthepharcyde: Red at night, bulls delight. SPY 715 tomorrow
[+8] u/Psychological_Fly109: for anyone trying to check futes right now - dont bother, this will be pinned to +0.2% by open on a potential concept of a renewed ceasefire
[+8] u/LimitIntelligent9946: Markets are rigged as fuck and facts don’t matter anymore. Only tweets and money supply. Real economy doesn’t matter
Can’t wait for this ass backwards admin, isntreal, and Wall Street to socialize these losses to the rest of the globe 😡
[+8] u/LimitIntelligent9946: We are ruled by algos. There’s no human thinking anymore. Nobody understands geopolitics or company fundamentals. Just buy the dip like regards and hope the next buyer pays a higher price
[+8] u/Strangerdanger8812: Futures look as expected... bullish
[+8] u/DeltaTule: Iran has to be one of the dumbest countries on Earth. Idk if it’s that or just pure arrogance that comes with their religious beliefs. I can’t believe they tried to pass a 900’ ship past a US guided missile destroyer. Absolute morons.
[+8] u/cptdipsht: I love how shook y’all are
[+8] u/Wolfgoatlife: Oil dumps and SPY pumps as Iran says strait of Hormuz will open WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER! 🥳 🎉
[+8] u/IntrepidToday0: “But…but…but what about the ceasefire violation?!”
No one gives a shit anymore about ceasefire or the Strait opening and closing every other day. Unless there’s a ground invasion or an aircraft carrier sunk, its calls.
[+8] u/boraboca: Bears will be celebrating until that 8:30 AM Axios article with the word “promising” drops
[+7] u/Williamnguyen62838: THE REVENGE OF BEAR IS HERE
[+7] u/Dategmiot: Once again poor retail fish trapped buying the peak.
[+7] u/Shoganai_Hito: Bought ASTS $82 puts expiring this Friday… felt something wouldn’t go right.
[+7] u/SoloOutdoor: I dont wanna go to fuckn work tomorrow. Started this bullshit cycle 30 years ago at 14. Ive had my fill.
[+7] u/MadSkyGlider: Am I the only oil bull at open?
[+7] u/teh_herper: #REMEMBER, STOP LOSS = STOP PROFIT
[+7] u/bruhsoundeffectmp3: MY NAME IS HARRY DRESDEN, OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR
[+7] u/Neat-Concentrate-239: fake peace: all time high
legit war: eh, -0.3%
and you guys literally think I'm more regarded than algos lmao
[+7] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: Literally nobody believes this dumb mf. The market barely down a paltry .8% at ATHs
[+7] u/Nagalavonpelt: Those futes look like a cocaine bear revenge 🐻
[+7] u/_rockthemike: I wish I held more calls over the weekend tbh this 100% gonna recover
[+7] u/gloomyglooom: WTF, the Navy blew a hole in the side of my portfolio
[+7] u/baadllama_ghost: market sees the biggest, fastest rally of all time based on the strait being open
strait closed
market rallies (probably)
[+7] u/Rvin16: What to cook today? Gourmet burgers or Pho 🍲
[+7] u/PhysInstrumentalist: I'm confused, what are these big red bars on the bitcoin chart? I thought they were all supposed to be green?
[+7] u/derprondo: Buying calls after the dump tomorrow.
[+7] u/Legitimate_Cable_811: I cant believe I'm saying this but this strait of hormuz thing is actually beating the tariffs in terms of snip snap
[+7] u/AcademicStandard3701: Bears is this all you have to offer 😂
[+7] u/teh_herper: #Didn't you know, it's illegal for spy to close red now, 🥭 said so
[+7] u/Jarlaxle_rigged_it: believe it or not, calls
[+7] u/Extreme_Green_1708: I’m deploying $100k ground troops into calls tomorrow off this dip. We will have a new “deal” by Friday. You literally just have to commit to the taco and you will make money. Same thing the insiders are doing. It’s the obvious play - made $40k Friday and I’ll do it again in the next 3 weeks.
[+7] u/Micheal_Hancho: # THATS IT? IS THIS ALL YOU CAN COJURE BERROMAN?
[+7] u/Jadeclone1: perfect taco tuesday lineup
[+7] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #ALGOS AT OPEN GONNA BE LIKE 'OH ANYWAYS UP GO WE GO'
[+6] u/CEO-of-SOXL: Oman this isn’t looking good for the market.
[+6] u/Waittoyouseemyclis: BREAKING: Iran says it has attacked US military ships with drones in retaliation for the US seizure of the Iranian cargo ship TOUSKA, per Tasnim.
[+6] u/looool_k_libtard: Very excited to get to buy ASTS for $20 tonight
[+6] u/Treverer: Been gone for a while, wanted to check if the straits open or not since futes open in a few mins and found out through a screenshot where 🥭 describes the event sounding like a 5 y.o. rambling about his dinosaur vs monstertruck showdown…
Can’t even jerk off in peace anymore without a world event happening
[+6] u/outhinking: Imagine if an Asian or Australian banker does a fat finger on the oil price instantly bringing it to 200
[+6] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: 15 mins, getting lube ready just in case
[+6] u/ILikeWhatISee69420: I am strait up ready for tomorrow.
[+6] u/LimitIntelligent9946: The fact that markets aren’t down further than 1% is proof this shit is rigged. JD VAnce is not going to Pakistan. THERE ARE NO NEGOTIATIONS
[+6] u/NotMe357: "BREAKING: Iranian military announces they will soon respond to the U.S. seizure of an Iranian-flagged vessel, calling it “maritime and armed robbery.”
[+6] u/LumpyShock9656: where do people see futes data?
[+6] u/ILikeWhatISee69420: BREAKING: Bears are ghey with the mods
[+6] u/Rocky_The_Champion: Nasdaq barely down. Crazy stuff.
[+6] u/Theleniel: There’s definitely someone who full ported into calls eod friday. I didn’t btw.
[+6] u/swofeloff: Why doesnt the UAE control the strait? Fuckin cucks
[+6] u/Napster-mp3: Fool me once not gon get fooled again
[+6] u/Advanced_Divide_4641: Go support a local stripper. It’s Sunday and it’s slow after skipping church. Escort bots will take all your money soon enough. The real strippers need you right now.
[+6] u/SlfImpr: You are poor because you don't have the insider information to play the weekly pump and dump game! 🤪
[+6] u/AllianceOrTheHorde: On the other hand, the markets need to have a bit of vacation time. maybe they shouldn't open tomorrow? i surely am not saying this only because i think my plays would be absolutely devastated tomorrow
[+6] u/pingoo26: From telegram, they're savvy negotiators the ceasefire will get extended IMO
>Details of the latest U.S.-Iran draft proposal, according to Amit Segal & various other journalists:
– Iran commits to a 15-year enrichment suspension, with the exception of research reactors for medical isotopes.
– Iran’s stockpile of 60% and 20% enriched uranium would be partially converted to reactor fuel, and partially ‘downblended’ to a lower enrichment level. However, it won’t leave Iran.
– IAEA supervison on nuclear sites.
– Opening the Strait of Hormuz, with the possibility of collecting tolls.
– The U.S. will offer Iran phased sanctions relief.
– The U.S. will unfreeze all Iranian assets currently frozen abroad, amounting to $20 Billion or more.
– The U.S. will commit to a non-aggression pact with Iran that is ensured through a UN National Security Council resolution and a treaty ratified by Congress.
– The U.S. will withdraw all its military forces from the Persian Gulf.
NOTE: This is simply the proposal currently being discussed, neither side have yet agreed to it.
@Middle_East_Spectator
[+6] u/pinkerton_gov: We are being lied to and numbed to the idea it’s fine to not even hide it anymore.
[+6] u/gcko: It’s 4/20 tomorrow. It’s going to be green regardless
[+6] u/pinghing: Oil futes + 7%
Stock futes -0.8%
Vix futes + 4.8%
[+6] u/New_Group3576: Gonna be another V believe it or not
[+6] u/pinghing: PLUNGE PROTECTION TEAM HAS BEEN ACTIVATED
A surprise tweet and a couple billion dollars will shortly be supplemented
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
[+6] u/gregot76: Why even tease red, just going to go green
[+6] u/trust_it_bb: ASTS delisting this week or next?
[+6] u/cow_grass: Wti cant even 90. Smh
[+6] u/Psychological_Fly109: the dip is so small even bers are not celebrating - this is not good. the pump is fueled off weekend bear energy
[+6] u/starentbrett: Meh. VIX futes only up 3.5%
[+6] u/AnotherDegenerateFK: Reducing my All Time loss percentages by depositing more money
[+6] u/GoProVI: a boat was literally seized by US
[+6] u/scrub_watch: Its not down 3% ber fuk
[+6] u/Current_Animator7546: Vote for a clown. Get a circus
[+5] u/2Frum4U: Black Monday confirmed. The markets will crater to levels not seen since early April.
[+5] u/Cashmoneytendies: Bulls feasted for 13 days, bears about to feast for 13 weeks
We are not the same
[+5] u/Street-Asparagus117: The economy has fucking sucked since last summer and we’re still at all time highs none of this makes any sense unless they’re cooking the inflation and jobs numbers
[+5] u/OnTheWaterWagon: It's got much further to go 👀
[+5] u/Mean_Bumblebee1945: Hedge funds have bought 86B worth of stocks and will add another 70B this week. Also consider that the use 2x leverage which will add up to over 1B in exposure. One of the largest global equity buying sprees in history.
[+5] u/shakazuluwithanoodle: bols full send on the bullshit
[+5] u/OG_L0c: Trump must have seen me make money last week
[+5] u/HFB_To_You: Venezuela + Iran operations are both really an indirect attack on China's oil supply (between Venezuela/Iran/Iraq looking at c. 25% of total Chinese oil supply).
Elbridge Colby of course the biggest China hawk out there.
How long until this blockade / ship seizures drag China into the fold...
[+5] u/Philly8181: Consumer confidence must be through the roof.
[+5] u/Scared-Signature-452: Good thing I took out 2500 from the markets to pay off my credit cards
[+5] u/Im_Gonna_Steal_It: I am currently in an MES long, MSTR puts, and VIX calls. Might be my most regarded portfolio construction to date
[+5] u/7fingersDeep: Awww yeah kids. It’s on like donkey Kong
https://www.reddit.com/r/CombatFootage/s/KAaxIoe7y9
[+5] u/NootNoot44NootNoot: This shits really going to rally into the space x IPO then dump like a bitch isn’t it
[+5] u/EnginrA: I just want to hit 50 mil
[+5] u/Vegetable-Lemon6669: 4 minutes till nothing burger 🍔
[+5] u/CPA-hole: Futures will be red and oil will be green
If anyone actually believes anything otherwise, you are a regard
[+5] u/YOLOdollhair: I've been fighting the move up since the beginning of April, saying this is all retarded. I kept trying to short, saying this situation and the market are both retarded. I bought more puts on Friday, most of them expiring worthless, thinking this is retarded. I sold my puts expiring on 04/26 and bought calls expiring this week thinking maybe I'll join in on the retardation.
Maybe I'm just retarded.
[+5] u/cashivyy: Lil glitch on the futures hopefully they get that fixed soon🙏
[+5] u/PNWPlayZ: Volatility is BACK (was gone for like 5 days)
[+5] u/_ThisDickAintFree_: Bull cope right on schedule.
[+5] u/MacroHard_0: Mf**r can’t even hold -1% red
[+5] u/damnthatbooty: It’s 4/20 tomorrow you know what that means
[+5] u/greyenlightenment: green by 10:00 ..watch
[+5] u/laurencenor: Another Sunday doomsday, Monday green day?
[+5] u/Mathguy200: Green by open.
AAPL $300 EOM.
That is all. Futes don’t matter
[+5] u/aka_crashoverride: Boats n hoes, boats n hoes, gotta seize my boats n hoes.
[+5] u/tzuica_de_mar: bol is decesed; ber king
[+5] u/peterpeer9: I have started saying "idk my husband does all of that" and it literally shuts everyone up 10 out of 10 times
I went to an open house one day out of curiosity "idk about the finance stuff my husband does all of that"
Phone sales guy at costco "sorry my husband deals with that"
Helps that I'm a guy too
[+5] u/Mighty-HeaIthy: Trump literally tweeted that “an entire civilization will DIE tonight” last week and we still went green the next morning, and bears think this time it’s for real.
[+5] u/Loan-Pickle: My nugget ice maker broke and I’ve been waiting all day on Amazon to deliver the part.
[+5] u/ILikeWhatISee69420: Ber fud makes me so god damn hard
[+5] u/FGoobs: At this point, I don’t care what the market does tomorrow. Goes up, cool. Goes down, cool. I’ll just buy more.
[+5] u/Professional_Ball_58: My CCs might be saved
[+5] u/TinyAdhesiveness5773: if im both ber and bull am i bi?
[+5] u/BooBrew32: "Barron, did you sell your calls and full port into puts on Friday? Good, check this out..."
[+5] u/Thebaxxxx: If they blew the engine room of TOUSKA that ship is finished. May as well tug it back to the states to add to our collection alongside the two oil tankers we siezed. In a few years we will have enough large merchant carriers to form a fleet!
> fyi these ships typically bring in 100 mil+ per trip so this is no joke for iran, the economic impact will be instantaneous and horrific for them.
[+5] u/kaapooj: eu officials seen holding a meeting to determine new meeting dates for meetings about the current state of the strait of hormuz
[+5] u/fomoandyoloandnogrow: Bulls will fight to validate their delusions about a market on the edge from one of the worst oil shocks in decades.
But one failed mess up by azz tits and they throw in the -25% garbage bin
ASTS +2% EOD Monday
[+5] u/Upstairs-Bonus3987: Did the US blockade the penguins island too??
[+5] u/IntentionDeep651: Bers deposits didnt even hit yet after fridays wipe outs lmao
[+5] u/ConstantAd1: Perhaps he'll attack Cuba tonight to distract from Iran?
[+5] u/Amsnyc007: Hormuz doesn’t mean shit - unless there’s good news. People are numb to it. The next real sell off will have nothing do with this conflict.
[+5] u/wildbill4693: Flat by open because a deal has to be made and then rips 2% on more progress.
[+5] u/spudbro00: \-1% open to -2% to even 5 minutes before open because this is the biggest ponzi scheme ever
[+5] u/churnAmex: Bears r so fuk LMAOOOOO
[+5] u/lostinspacs: Absolutely no chance that they let bers cash their puts
The 🥭 pump is coming tonight or pre-market
[+5] u/d33p7r0ubl3: I swear this better not get bought up before I have a chance to buy calls
[+5] u/_rockthemike: Is it too soon to make fun of the bears, they’re fucking insufferable
[+5] u/Icy-Motor-8519: IRAN OUT OF MONEY FOR CALLS SO THE STRUGGLE ISRAEL HAHAHAHAHA (SLAPS KNEE) FUCK SAKES
[+5] u/YOLOdollhair: Futures candle green already. Maybe my calls won't be cooked. I may open some contracts long on NQ.
[+5] u/shindiggaa: Iran is not gonna stop this bull run with their jon boats
[+5] u/tinydisaster: https://www.ishormuzopenyet.com/
[+5] u/Cramer4President: That's it???
Green by open son
[+5] u/jnas_19: Weekend NQ traders were pretty accurate. This is easily V’able if US blockade goes away
[+5] u/kaapooj: bears again too cocky
[+5] u/HFB_To_You: W/ a little help of Trump's orchestrated pumping, they wiped the obscene amount of March/Apr puts off the board worthless on Friday.
Now they can sell it.
[+5] u/jer72981m: I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY
[+5] u/MetalEnthusiast83: There will be a tweet before opening.
[+5] u/trust_it_bb: Liquidate every single asset and buy weekly puts on ASTS.
This is financial advice
[+5] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: Somebody please talk me out of dumping all my ASTS at 8pm
[+5] u/SoloOutdoor: We dont have a choice
[+14] u/getbentspez: It’s pretty damn bullish in here
[+13] u/bigmeatbag: So Donnie is pretty much a Somali pirate gang leader now seizing ships and shit.
[+13] u/ben1492: The futures really are pricing in a pre-market Truth Social post.
[+12] u/unikuenobody: I have puts that are already -82%. Even if 🥭 comes out as gay at open, still ded.
[+12] u/Provolone-Jones: Bulls are going to be so annoying tomorrow when 🥭 announces that his magic 8 ball says a deal is likely
[+12] u/Shanknado: Bulls still don't fully understand the demand destruction that's coming in the oil market. Keep buying your calls my puts are long.
[+12] u/Provolone-Jones: THE STRAIT IS OPEN IF YOU BELIEVE IT IS: oil -15%
SHIPS GETTING BLOWN TO BITS: oil +5%
[+12] u/FlatwormBig5514: Already a 30pt recovery on ES. Never seen anything like it.
[+11] u/No-Relationship8261: It's going to be so funny, when we pump on the day of the boots on the ground. Bers will lose their shit.
[+11] u/No-Sympathy-686: Cunts....
The lot of ya....
[+10] u/TrickyDickCheney: Tuesday is May oil contracts expiration day.
[+10] u/IDFStrongestSoldier: 5 weeks left of jet fuel in Europe. I'm sure Trump has solved the middle east by then
[+10] u/Kingmusk420: GREEN BY OPEN. BEARS R GEY
[+10] u/BestKoreaEscapee: 🥭threatening more war crimes on Truth Social… so calls?
[+10] u/CherryPokerGame: Mag 7 circlejerk will prop up the market
[+10] u/abameal: everyone screaming ASTS is gonna crash but i bet it’s green tomorrow
[+10] u/Karl-Levin: [Israeli army says image showing soldier smashing Jesus statue in south Lebanon is authentic](https://aje.news/w7b54q?update=4506408)
They are so proud of their crimes they even confirm them.
[+9] u/SuperbSandwich: Iran Military states ship attacked by U.S. was en route to Iran *from China* 😔
[+9] u/Most_Luck4971: Who the hell forgot to say thank you.
[+9] u/zuziannka: Experiencing peak loneliness
[+9] u/SuperbSandwich: I think/guess oil goes up alongside the s&p this week
[+9] u/Cutalana: Whatever happens tomorrow, remember, no crying in the casino
[+8] u/Weak_Emu3659: I know I've almost lost all my money but god damn...I feel like I just need one good trade to get it all back and more
[+8] u/Rexed88: God I'm happy my covered call was assigned, that's 100k out of market
[+8] u/mannycalls24: USO calls were so obvious 😩😫😩😩
[+8] u/Rugpull_Generator: Bears sweating already lmaoo
[+8] u/aftherith: The market has determined that too is no biggie
[+8] u/wenxuan2: All i see are green candles in futes lol, we already recovered 0.4%
[+8] u/GullibleAppearance64: Its been what, 3 weekends in a row of bears blowing their loads all over the weekend thread? If its not a sad bear winning theyre not winning. This is market theory
[+8] u/Orda22494: The day I stopped being a 🌈 🐻 is the day I started making money
[+7] u/Mettabreaks: Everyone is expecting a green open...I'm starting to think it will not be, in fact, green. People have caught onto this game of Gay Hormuz Chicken. Schrodinger's strait is not both open and closed at the same time- the anus must be open to see which is reality upon inspection. Take a victory lap bols. It was literally a historic streak. Even the most euphoric must know it cannot go forever.
IF if does go red today, don't keep buying the dip....just yet. Be patient. Mr civilization ender will pump once more
[+7] u/Asleep_Salad_3275: Bears out there screaming victory and it’s not even down 1% lmfao
[+7] u/MixFit5225: Night is young and full of shit. Bol fuk.
[+7] u/poophowe_woophowe: I'll jerk off 2 or 3 times tomorrow and maybe order a pizza
[+7] u/KindlyTie6602: Has anyone checked this market’s chromosomes? I have a theory
[+7] u/PottedGantt: I’m never holding calls over the weekend again this is pure masochism and regardium
[+7] u/Bichael-Murry: cant wait for the great correction, followed by the great taco pump
rinse and repeat
[+7] u/hv876: Forget being in 🥭’s signal, can I be on Iran signal chat that manipulated thr market on Friday?
[+7] u/csvt2354: Hmm definitely buy calls at open dip for ez scalpz
[+7] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: You were warned BERS, this is a nothing burger for markets.
[+7] u/Hot_Avocado_2701: Lol the fact that people here really expect asts to drop 40% probably means a tiny drop and then back to 90
[+7] u/No_Psychology_4339: What is even the point of starting red If everybody and their nan is knowing that it will be green before Open?
[+7] u/Ble_h: I know tomorrow will be green because of the amount of shit talking bers are doing tonight.
[+6] u/kairepaire: Is just one circuit breaker day too much to ask for?
[+6] u/DrestinBlack: Bloodbath Monday?
And I mean in addition to -20% on ASTS
[+6] u/Adrian12094: will rklb keep ripping?
[+6] u/BFox1982: I would pay the entirety of my net worth just for a lottery ticket to have the chance to eat Olivia Rodrigo's ass.
[+6] u/rusty888: Ghalibaf saying that the financial system is built in layers, with real oil supply at the base, financial instruments on top of it, and U.S. Treasuries at the top.
Oil is priced in dollars because key routes like the Strait of Hormuz stay open, and Treasuries are seen as safe partly because of that system. This stability depends heavily on confidence and geopolitical control, not just economic fundamentals.
If a major disruption hits the physical oil supply, the connection between real assets and financial markets can break down, and even “safe” assets like Treasuries could lose credibility.
[+6] u/X-CaliberRacing: Not sure what everyone is talking about, this was already priced in! Green by noon unless they sink 2 ships .
[+6] u/FlatwormBig5514: Russell 2000 is pulling back, staying over 70 rsi on the 1 min lmao. Don't mind the tariff refunds or the war or the price of oil and fertilizer or the record credit card debt. This is entertainment at it's finest.
[+6] u/kanyedidnothingwr0ng: I just took a nappy nap cuz I get so sweepy when I drink a beer in the afternoon. It was so tasty with my uncrustable tho
[+6] u/Ok_Buffalo2027: Why are people saying $ASTS is cooked tomorrow?
(I have no shares. I’m super stoned)
[+6] u/Paul_Robert_: There's less than a 1% chance that it prints.
Average WSB degen: So you're telling me there's a chance?
[+6] u/BirdyPooPoo: Bols have 2 choices. Panic sell on the open or panic sell later in the day at worse prices.
[+6] u/_Rexfest_: 715 by open. Fuck you bers
[+6] u/Spiritual_Taste_1253: TSLA financials are gonna be shit but they are gonna sell the future outlook and the stock is gonna pump of course.
No idea how to play it
[+6] u/Academic_Lock_1699: After the recent events and pace I thought the US would have invaded Cuba by now
[+6] u/nascarhero: So we’re still good for Islamabad tomorrow then?
[+6] u/akdbaker816: Yea way too bearish in here
[+6] u/j4c11: Buying calls at ATH is highly regarded, not gonna lie
[+5] u/LiveInLayers: Do the mods still give out flairs like they used to?
My mod was drunk when he did mine.
[+5] u/jda823: A month later and we are still speculating on truth social tweets
[+5] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: ghalibaf is probably one of us LMAO
[+5] u/Separate_Asparagus94: Iran is sending drones to U.S. ships. I’m sure by tomorrow morning there will be escalation and this will be down more. If the U.S. actually had the power to open the strait they would
[+5] u/wenxuan2: I wont call any day red until we see atleast a -2.5%
[+5] u/Ill_Cancel4937: Iran hit US military vessels with drones.
[+5] u/McKoijion: Lmao, our Iranian quant has embraced his new role.
> Vibe-trading digital oil is like vibe-hedging in treasuries during Hormuz risk-off. Both share one house of cards that works on paper.
Difference: oil at least has Dated Brent. Treasuries? Vibes all the way down.
> EUCRBRDT Index GP <GO>
https://x.com/mb_ghalibaf/status/2045986841220772123
[+5] u/Invisible_Pony: Tomorrow I will open the strait and then after-hours, close the strait. I'm taking the credit this time!
[+5] u/LiveInLayers: I feel like its going to open red just because the bears are dead.
[+5] u/Jimmy_Wrinkles: I don't have the balls to trade even when the market isn't dictated by a senile octogenarian sending tweets from the shitter. You are all my heroes.
[+5] u/Pale-Silver-8178: Ah shit here we go again.
[+5] u/iwishiwasameme: I'm becoming addicted to reading the highest of regards comments here. It's like a never ending train wreck. I love you all. Keep up the good work.
[+5] u/SuspiciousStable9649: Weekend oil chart looks like boobs.
[+5] u/DrSeuss1020: Bezos buys a competitor to ASTS and then in the same week, blue origin happens to accidentally deploy their satellite in the wrong spot forcing a de orbit? My grandfather always said conspiracies are like assholes…
[+5] u/elcasar: OpenAI pivoting to making sustainable, comfortable, and minimalist sneakers.
[+5] u/tocinoman: It's because I held calls over the weekend
[+5] u/Hot_Sacks: Market has faith. Faith in the 🌮
[+5] u/borgeris: Bears posting bulls fucked after a lock out rally is a tad embarrassing ngl
[+5] u/browsk: Listen I don’t like it either, but the fact is we’re opening green tomorrow
[+5] u/TreeofLibertyFood: Beach Tip: a popped blister makes a great sand pouch.
[+5] u/DonCenote: Denialism or media censorship. Pick your poison.
[+5] u/Chris_P_Bacon_Jr: So… green? Red? Yellow? What the fuck color is my graph going to be? Fuck if I know.
[+5] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: BERS waiting for circuit breakers, just go crabbing regards.
[+5] u/Fullflavourfruit: It would be funny if ASTS crashed tomorrow and every other space stock ripped because their cult is retarded and annoying.
[+5] u/Shot-Welcome-2822: Most annoying cult ever
[+5] u/Zeppu: Now that we're at ATH, I think it would be a great idea to start up the money printer so the normies have some cash to buy this overpriced shit.
[+5] u/Adventurous_Garlic58: Breaking Iran said fk Mango calls
[+5] u/RevealFit9288: I’m not even a bear but I feel bad for them at this point. How the fuck is this even possible. Every dip is a V up the ass
[+5] u/zangor: I’m a bull but I bought a bunch of puts to hedge. But we all know what’s gonna happen. Futures will be red and then by 10 AM there will be a “rocket taking off” pattern on SPY.
[+5] u/Sharp-Direction-6894: Girls in their 20s are so fucking immature and they're inexperienced in sex.
[+5] u/jasperCrow: Does anyone have the itinerary for Bridge Day and Power Plant day?
[+5] u/Fearless-Mongoose566: Cash gang has never felt so good. I knew he was so full of shit I knew not to buy into this clown market yet people in here fail to acknowledge that 🥭 can't taco unilaterally when there is more than one party heavily involved. That's why this shit has way more to dump.
[+17] u/borrokalaria: Remember, all bols, bers, and regards are expected to gather here tomorrow morning at 9am to celebrate the 26th official reopening of the Hummus Strait!
[+15] u/WombatShwambat: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+14] u/Coley44: Another week of stupid nonsensical movements upwards whilst we ignore the impending ramifications of this all. Funniest market of all time
[+13] u/SmoothOperator423: BREAKING NEWS: OBI WAN KENOBI AND QUI GON JINN HAVE LANDED IN PAKISTAN
[+12] u/Boheed: happy Insider Trading Eve to all who celebrate
[+11] u/kjl8921: Imagine not closing out your calls on Friday
[+11] u/theprodigy107: Escalation means a closed strait. A closed strait means you can reopen it. Reopening means we pump another 12%. Escalation is therefore bullish.
[+10] u/CardiologistEqual336: i am exit liquidity 😎
[+10] u/No_Fig_7835: Tomorrow: -5%
Bulls: LMAO stupid bears only down 5% V soon
[+10] u/qx2: Place all your bets on a deranged ego, yeah that is sustainable. 🤔
[+10] u/ten7four: Tomorrow opens -2.4% ends day green
[+9] u/powerboner: I told a guy on /personalfinance to buy LEAPS for the best use of his 30K to his name and got downvoted to hell. I’m back home now guys 😘
[+9] u/ballsonreddit: Fucking hell
ASTS instantly -8.8%
[+9] u/Inevitable_Estate459: Futures are only 0.7% red. We are really going to be Green by open again. Arent we????
[+9] u/Gadshill: If the Iranians don’t show for the talks does that mean we win the war by default?
[+9] u/maximuminimum: Tomorrow we find out if whether due to my clever financial maneuvering, I find myself tremendously in debt…
[+9] u/mtnrnnr802: We’re going to be green by open aren’t we
[+9] u/ignatious__reilly: Spy is still at $704
That’s amazing actually
[+9] u/Nice-Truck8806: ayo mods why is a certain island-having, predator-financier wordfiltered? you in the files bruh?
[+9] u/DovahkiinAF: Strait open - market up 3% 🎉
Strait closed - market down 0.03%
Fake and gay 🤡 market
[+9] u/LaserBeamer17: Tonight’s Thread
Bears: Counting their gay chickens before they hatch for the third weekend in a row.
Bulls: Coping with -0.75% SPY futures and the reality that we might finally get a red day after 2+ weeks of nonstop green.
[+9] u/Beneficial_Ad9547: Weekly $720 spy calls at open
[+8] u/Aaladorn: I cant believe this april "rally" was just the mother of all dead cat bounces
[+8] u/survivalnecessities: Ground invasion this week
[+8] u/ConsciousScar7821: Futes are in perpetual “green by open” mode.
[+8] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Open the fucking casino so we can see if futes are real and strait of whoremoans
[+8] u/Boheed: I'm gonna be honest, I went a little too hard on Allbirds and I'm gonna need you to buy a lot of it
[+8] u/Jacobpapi: Between 8pm to 7am we may see “WE MADE A DEAL” again
[+8] u/Powerful-Reaction607: We will celebrate tomorrow as well with a +1.13% day. Thank you for your attention to this matter!
[+8] u/pmotiveforce: No they fucking aren't. You tards really have to stop with this 4d chess bullshit. There is no grand plan, no long term strategy.
[+8] u/StuffedBunss: Alright bro we gotta be at least semi real
[+7] u/Appropriate_Ice_7507: For the love of god, please fucking crash! Got puts up to my tits!
[+7] u/Bizonistic: Boots on the ground by Tuesday, no more TACO
[+7] u/TobiasBloyd: Of course the market isn't crashing, I mean why would it? It's not like it surged based on a big lie and then we found out about the lie
[+7] u/mtnrnnr802: Is SPY getting de-listed
[+7] u/No_Relief_8705: No Mr. Stonk Market, I expect you to die.
[+7] u/No_Fig_7835: marine tracker website is the ultimate winner of all this
[+7] u/probablyuntrue: Every Friday night: WE ARE GONNA BOMB EM TO HELL
Every Sunday night: pwease make peace 🥺
[+7] u/ShitpostSulthan: all this drama only to end tomorrow sideways or green.. 🤡🤡🤡
[+7] u/mehmilani: As a proud overnight holder of puts, I feel like the gap down is going to get closed by market open and then sideways.
[+7] u/mtnrnnr802: Once again, I will need to make an onlyfans. God damnit.
[+7] u/Additional_Diver584: 🥭: you’ve never seen a peace deal like this. This is the peace deal of the century.
24 hours from now
[+7] u/pajaemainroad: I'm going balls deep on SPY calls tomorrow
[+7] u/RemarkableWar8266: As long as Iran aint gonna send some Shaheeds towards US bases and warships its gonna be nothingburger and tomorrow we will have flat day of +/-1$, so all of u gamblers will get fcked by IV crush🫡
[+7] u/Bear_Thesis: Theta this, gamma that. Bro, I asked for LARGE fries!
[+7] u/Imaginary-Writer-125: The easiest way to get a job in this market is to:
1) go to church
2) find a Christian/catholic boss that is religious
3) send your resume and write “god is great” at least 10-12 times somewhere somehow
[+7] u/Boheed: Is this good for Allbirds?
[+7] u/Slabbed1738: They literally can't go a day without killing a child
[+7] u/Elforas_Tero: Last weekend was the same. Bers should be terrified that they’ll get the reopening and peace talks AGAIN
[+7] u/mmmmmmmayhem: USO 15 bucks and SPY 1000 tmr
[+6] u/YungIrv: Can’t wait for the 0.5% dip for bers to finally be happy
[+6] u/ruskyandrei: If you're thinking "i hope it crashes so i can buy a bunch of discount stocks" it means it won't crash because there's millions of other regards just like you who can't wait to buy the dip.
The real crash will be when you're either out of cash from buying the last 5 dips or too scared to buy anything and actually starting to consider selling positions that are 50% down.
[+6] u/borrokalaria: WTF?! Went to get some gas today, and it was more expensive than last week! The war ended, right? The markets rallied for two weeks, and the oil got crushed, so WTF is going on here? Am I getting played by the ghey bers here? Some kind of bol trap?
[+6] u/Shortify: Ghalibaf is saying he controls the physical oil reality. The financial story only holds as long as he allows it.
[+6] u/e30jawn: US sailors eating slop thinking well at least its over. Sike time for more edible shoe sole.
[+6] u/GrondForGondor: All of my OXY calls expired worthless Friday. And now it’s back to a shit show. Wtf
[+6] u/FearlessStatement144: Iran saying won’t even participate in talks if he doesn’t stop the blockade. Did ya hear that fucking market. Stop reacting to his fuckin lies
[+6] u/ring_of_slattern: Having a gambling addiction is kinda nice because at least I have something to look forward to when the weekend is ending
[+6] u/unclefire: Oil gonna pump. Strait isn’t open and US just fucked up an Iranian ship.
[+6] u/Dizzy-Green-3188: Asts down 14 percent premarket no biggie
[+6] u/DryNefariousness7927: I have 690 puts tomorrow, so it's probably gonna rally higher
[+6] u/stonetrade: About to give back the last 3 weeks gains because I believed the strait was completely open
[+6] u/darkphenom67: something feels different this time
[+6] u/CharmingSoil: It's ridiculous, but they'll take it green by open
[+6] u/falling_knives: If this is all it drops, we're gonna close green tomorrow or even open green.
[+6] u/TrumpsCummyOnahole: Lmao why is the US firing on Iran not on the front page of r/news already
[+6] u/Disconn3cted: If we ever get flying cars, Tiger Woods is gonna drive them drunk
[+6] u/AndItsThetaAgain: There are no bulls here
Only pigs
[+6] u/MrGunny94: Heh, bulls thought Strait was only closed on weekends lmao
[+6] u/True_Truth: Believe it or not both
[+5] u/inkognibro: It’s like self banning yourself from the casino
[+5] u/Low_Plastic363: So the Obama deal, but worse?
[+5] u/Beagle001: After reviewing recent global events and market behavior, I’ve decided to stop doing that.
[+5] u/Mahrez-: Hell nah ASTS -14% instantly
[+5] u/stringtheory28: These MFers are actually pumping psychedelics and weed on 4/20 (re:executive order)
[+5] u/Waveytony: Don’t forget: he always TACOs after the closing BELL 🤓
[+5] u/ShitpostSulthan: ASTS - time to buy now and sell again when it pops back to 90's
[+5] u/Effective_Put_5209: What's this? A crash for ants!?
[+5] u/nickpufferfish: Still waiting for Iran to respond with some shaheds or this will be a nothing burger 😴
[+5] u/winston511: In just over 20 minutes I will know whether I’m going to be shopping for ropes or lambos
[+5] u/ten7four: Open the Fuckin' Casino, you crazy bastards! Praise be to Allah.
[+5] u/dylanx5150: I'm gonna need NFLX to announce they are increasing monthly subscriptions to $49.99
[+5] u/andytobbles: Chat moving so fast nobody will see that I’m hopping on test and cjc-1295/ipamorellin to get jacked/shredded and take the easy route
[+5] u/abused-throwawayy: Which of you dumb fucks got bearish positions?
[+5] u/kingoftheoneliners: This week taco dinner will be on Weds
[+5] u/Coloradospruce33: The whales buying billions worth of MSFT, META, GOOGL, AMD, ORCL etc give ZERO shits about the latest in Iran.
They are buying because these companies had fallen up to 40% and it was a historic sell off.
[+5] u/Throwingdartsmouth: Bit of a predicament here. I figured we would bounce off lows, make new highs, then retest 660. Felt good about that as news dropped of no second round of talks with Iran based on their fear that a US attack is imminent.
Then I saw a note that Cramer said to sell, and now my whole thesis has been upended. Fuck.
[+5] u/isc1200s: The opening bell is going to be nasty and extremely painful.
My fellow bulls: May the force be with you.
[+5] u/b1mm3rl1f3: I'm the fittest and leanest I've been in a looooong time. Sex drive through the roof but now I need my money up. Something's always missing.
[+5] u/Gandalfthebran: Only the share market can make me excited for weekdays.
[+5] u/Afraid_Contest_6769: Bers, do not get fooled again. For your own sake
[+5] u/wattap: Futes literally don’t care, green by open
[+5] u/qx2: It’s all priced in 🤡🤣
[+5] u/TrailerParkBuddha: Looks like I am calling up my 🌈 🐻 friends and telling them I'm going clubbing with them tomorrow
[+5] u/kevbot234: If my fucked up puts are saved tomorrow ima start going to church
[+5] u/Ok-Art6659: Guess my 720c are fucked
[+5] u/Informal-Composer226: Quit my job today, praying for flat tomoz
[+5] u/SilverVikingTT: Iran war live: Trump says Iran ship seized; Tehran denies agreeing to talks
[+5] u/kbenitez1271: Damn y'all are cute together
[+5] u/AdOk3638: My calls are cooked tmr, thanks Tacoman 😡
[+19] u/orobsky: Never thought I'd see a war fought only on evenings and weekends
[+18] u/Lcc30: Ahh the classic .5-1.0% dump after the weekend in after/overnight hours just to pump back to green by open then moon to +1% by close. Got it
[+14] u/arbitraryBlue: Flat by open, +1.2% by closing
[+12] u/CallsOrPutsYES: #MSFT green in an hour
[+11] u/Tropicalfisher: THE STRAIT IS OPEN: +1.6%
THE STRAIT IS CLOSED AND WE WILL NOT PARTAKE IN FURTHER NEGOTIATIONS TO OPEN IT: -0.7%
[+11] u/SenileOldDude: Biggest regret of my life was losing that 200k on 0 DTE. Work about 65-75 hours a week and a man is exhausted. Money could’ve changed everything
[+11] u/KyleNoThumbs319: Asians will save the day. Green is programmed on 4/20
[+10] u/Damandalorianway: i can’t believe spy is at $700 and i’m still poor what a fuck tard i truly am
[+9] u/Sjw455: Not even down 1% shi will be green tmr
[+9] u/TopTrey9: -.6%…wtf lol
That’s all bears have?
[+9] u/weewoowewoooo: Market barely even down even though we’re back to exactly where we were before the bullshit strait being open announcement lmfao
[+9] u/Mammoth-Librarian580: Bulls see 5-10 days of green and think everything will go up forever, what a dumb tribe the perma bull day trader
[+9] u/SKJ_2012: Puts seem obvious for tomorrow. But that never works out for me so imma buy calls instead
[+9] u/TipsyPeanuts: Market will be green tomorrow. Y’all haven’t learned a damn thing
[+8] u/Independent-Chef-169: Green by open. No one cares about Hormuz. We have enough oil. Believe it or not, still calls.
[+8] u/AnimalIndependent: ASTS you fuckin suck
[+8] u/Iunatic: If you ain't buying this ASTS dip you ain't black.
[+8] u/Prince_Chunk: Pre market red, open green
[+8] u/Typical-Layer-1253: Lost out on thousands listening to stupid bears. Market just wants to go up
[+8] u/ALittleWorseEveryday: Bears are the most pathetic species on the planet to be celebrating -0.7% calling for a crash. Source: am one
[+8] u/Smurf_Crime_Scene: ASTS
Believe it or not... CALLS!!! ☎️☎️☎️
[+8] u/maplessbastard: Ya GG’s green on open
[+8] u/Drokeep: If yall still buy puts, you deserve to be swindled
[+7] u/dataCollector42069: up 25k for the year, never seen markets so manipulated in my life. Paying off student loans tomorrow and saying goodbye to this
[+7] u/Sauronchessnoob: down -0.05% by open, flips green by 1pm
[+7] u/jakeisarake: Fewer and fewer panic sellers these days, rip bears
[+7] u/iwasbanned88: ASTS bros fuming at bezos rn
[+7] u/k3mpk3mp: ASTS down 16%+ premarket damn son. Will buy in at 40-50 range if it gets there!
[+7] u/civillyRange: Im an AI company i dont have the power or water or space to make data centers but I'm making deals left and right so pump my stock
[+7] u/Swimming_Middle_7476: repeat after me: GREEN BY OPEN
[+7] u/FrankelloHello: I hope SMR gets back to $20 soon. I’m tired of feeling like dumb dumb bubble gum
[+7] u/HaveTwoBananas: Treasury just printing money and buying stocks
[+7] u/dataCollector42069: yeah this shit will be green by open
[+7] u/e10n: FUTES recovering. Green by open. 2% day incoming. LFG. America the greatest!
[+7] u/csr8765: Ber watching hopes and dreams get destroyed tick by tick as the V shape is unfolding in futures
[+7] u/lordbell21: This is a copy of last Sunday lmao
[+6] u/QTpieme: Everyone’s expecting it to go back green (including me) which tells me it will be a red day
[+6] u/SilverPrivateer: North Korean ships (4) headed towards the Strait, no indication of why
[+6] u/Indra_Sx: Seeing $700 is crazy for some reason.
[+6] u/Nateleb1234: Total bs. Why won't it go down
[+6] u/Elegant-Berry5192: Both Bols and Bers rn 🤌
There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again
[+6] u/civillyRange: So the whole pump was bullshit? 🤔
[+6] u/tnguyen5057: You call that a dip? Green by EOD
[+6] u/East-Description-243: Open the casino! Betcha $100 that Amazon buys ASTS.
[+6] u/Cantthinkofacoolnam: I realize someone was shorting my plays on here
[+6] u/2Hosslovescash: So much dope getting smoked tomorrow and calls being bought.
[+6] u/AdditionalMany1292: We’re gonna be so brainrotted in a couple
Of years that ChatGPT is gonna have to dumb itself down to pass the Turing test
[+6] u/Stunning-Dig-8916: Freak the fuck out and sell everything then buy at all time highs.
[+6] u/fan_of_hakiksexydays: Iran has zero intention of ever letting go of the Strait of Hormuz.
It's like an alternative to a nuclear warhead, but that they can actually use and make money from. Which is what Iran wanted all along.
No deal is ever gonna get them to change that, unless the deal lets them have the alternative: a nuclear warhead.
[+6] u/Confident-Window4928: Why the fuck can we not buy options in after hours or overnight trading. So dumb.
[+6] u/Maximum-Side-9391: Ask Jeeves needs to be reborn as AI company
[+6] u/emperor_dinglenads: It's all insider trading.
[+6] u/curtanbe23: 6 mins until SPY 695
[+6] u/civillyRange: Iran creating memes of AI Jesus throwing AI 🥭 into the pits of hell LMAO
[+6] u/Sensitive_Guest_5995: Futures opened not giving a fuck. Lmao. Okayyyy dude
[+6] u/C130J_Darkstar: Setting up for the classic TACO Tuesday
[+6] u/NOT_A_OFFICER: I couldn't imagine being on the gerald r ford, pushing 10 months out to sea now. fuuuuck that shit.
[+5] u/plzplzplztendies: Greedy bul holding calls into the weekend
[+5] u/Old-Commission2782: INTC deserves to be back in the 40's. Honestly, fuck that stock.
[+5] u/FullCopy: UAE is asking for a life line. I’m sure they have pawnshops in the neighborhood
[+5] u/dljmonkeyboiz: It’s all so broken … nothing ain’t right
[+5] u/bub356: Green by open lol market does not care anymore and knows there will be a TACO
[+5] u/SlickRick941: US defense stocks, go long. War isn't ending anytime soon
[+5] u/kawkface: Let's all agree to buy some $MSFT tmrw
[+5] u/trent_upscale: Tongue punching fartboxes isn't a lifestyle, folks
[+5] u/myjumboloanapp: So ASTS went down because of Amazon (bezos company) this week and is going down again next week because of Blue Origins failure to launch into orbit (also bezos company)?
[+5] u/you_are_temporary: The funny thing is that the market being green for like 20 straight days is unusual enough that betting on a single day pullback isn’t unreasonable even without the tanker bullshit
That being said, likely green
[+5] u/WantonCateran: Anyone else overnight trades being rejected?
[+5] u/miss_L_fire: Just realized in my revenge trading rage on Friday I bought calls expiring on 4/20 not 4/30. Welp.
[+5] u/cryptohorn: Watching wrestlemania
🙂 👍
[+5] u/DuckLIT122000: I get all of the thrill of trading oil futures by deciding if I should fill my gas tank all the way or not. Brokies stay winning
[+5] u/SilverPrivateer: Escalation is bullish, means things are progressing instead of being stagnant forever
[+5] u/OptionsHuduga: As a bol I need tomorrow to be blood red so I can buy more. After 5 days of green I’m ready to keep growing my empire.
[+5] u/wrongrobertpatrick: It’s incredibly humiliating when you take your iPhone 17 Pro Max to Apple because the camera is cracked. They tell you it’s just a camera protector, and then you realize you were so baked when you installed it that you completely forgot about it.
[+5] u/pussinbuuts: AAPL unbothered. Moisturized. Happy. In its own lane. Focused. Flourishing
[+5] u/aqjingson: Honestly not as red as I thought
[+5] u/Maximum-Side-9391: 420 always green day
[+5] u/ReggaeBusRider: SPY 700 or 720 tomorrow? Asking for a friend.
[+5] u/Normal-Election7707: By Wednesday 🥭 will say Iran gonna have McDonald’s and Dunkin’ Donuts on every corner in Tehran. Then by Thursday morning more shops fired on. Get ready for shit show this week boys and girls
[+5] u/JSlickJ: looks like I'll be a longtime ASTS bagholder
[+5] u/nhalas: That would be hillarious if Iran send a bait ship full of shit to see what US will do to stop it.
[+5] u/UnitedCup1814: Markets have to go up so people can afford gas 🥭 knows this
[+5] u/ch33ky_n1nj4: Anybody shorting or buying puts for ASTS? Gotta get back the money I lost on this turd
[+5] u/discombobulantics: Probably gonna be calls for me, dawg
[+5] u/ThanksDependent1001: $705 after hours. Open roughly around $701-$702 after folks ber out and panic sell. Buy all the $705 -$715 calls for Tuesday and Wednesday cheap. 🥭on Tuesday negotiations went great all is well. SPY back to $725 due to solid tech earnings end of week.
[+5] u/CD274: Annndddd ..... Oracle is off again
[+5] u/1337Scott: You know what they say... Red Corn Red SPY... I don't make the rules🌽😵
[+19] u/WSB-mods-are-: Quit your job. Follow your dreams. Start that small business
That's how I went from making $5000 a month to $500
[+18] u/spectra444: Ber so dumb to think we won't open green
[+15] u/Neemzeh: Absolutely disgusting. On pace to be green by open lmfao
[+14] u/Jolly_Cicada380: Oh we pumping tomorrow
[+13] u/solidsneeze: we could block the strait of hormuz a lot more efficiently if we just put your mom there
[+13] u/Dependent-Capital532: Bears getting reemed tomorrow
[+13] u/TheLongDede: Nah, we actually actually going green 💀
[+12] u/Zfreezy: My brain says puts so I will go ahead and inverse trade that.
[+12] u/Premier_Legacy: Green by open, already know what it is
[+11] u/Automatic-Scene5621: I have May 15 780 calls. I like my chances. My wife likes my chances. I heard her telling her boyfriend over the phone she thinks it’s time
[+10] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Like I’m a ber but you’d have to be blind to not understand the game right now. It’s going up until something breaks
[+10] u/Dart2255: Good News= Calls
Bad News= Calls
No News= Calls
I Buy Calls= PUTS TO THE TITS!
[+10] u/kemar7856: Going on a hungar strike until spy is back under 700 🐻
[+10] u/Ok-Cut-6064: They’re gonna let me buy more calls smh
[+10] u/Sweaty-Sherbet-6926: Trump could shoot Vance in the head live on TV and the market would only drop 0.5%
[+10] u/TraditionalPhone3992: Futes green by morning. Bulls rule!
[+9] u/twenty_three_three: For the first time in this conflict, Sunday marked the first day that zero ships passed through the strait. We've gone from 5-10% of normal bbl flow to 0%. Oil futures don't seem to care.
[+9] u/Jagged_Tide: Red at night, bols delight. Red in the morning, bols take warning ⚠️
[+9] u/Lolsmileyface13: green by morning. this market is predictable, even in this chaos. elevators up, a few stairs down, elevators up.
[+9] u/SocraticGoats: Stupid bers downvoting me for saying green by open, already halfway there in a few hours
[+9] u/Vicvega2018: I love living in a country that has so much power over the entire world
[+9] u/Character_Set3454: Spy barely down, Monday premarket they announce cessation of the ceaseing of the ceasefire.
Then we go +1% per day for the week. Spy going to 1080 then 4k
[+9] u/Specialist_Fig9458: We’re going green which is so fucking funny
[+9] u/Domgrath42: Zero chance this shit isn't green by open
[+9] u/GuiltyShirt3771: Future is down but I will not be surprised if we end up green eow
[+9] u/StocksStormTrooper: Red Futes… sure sure😂
[+9] u/Joij21: 🪢
🐻📈Bers Tomorrow
👕
👖
🧦
🪑
[+8] u/Western_Rope_6826: Chat too confident, puts at open
[+8] u/OnlyBols: Green by my morning dump
[+8] u/Hi_I_am_gosu: \-.5% futures after a 12% run in two weeks and all the mouth breathers come out again
[+8] u/surmoiFire: I hope you guys filled your tank today
[+8] u/nsfwnsfwnsfw33333: Any hot options in my area?
[+8] u/Slow-Information-847: At this point, 🥭 has to TACO tomorrow morning at 7am. Otherwise, if he cannot blow up every bridge and power plant by Tuesday. Everybody in the world will laugh at his small dick
[+8] u/BoomerSharkBoy: This market is weird ass scooby doo, it will open green ! just watch
[+8] u/Vort3x7689: How have you bers not learned that the market doesn’t care about the war anymore
[+7] u/WSB-mods-are-: I don't think people understand the sophisticated communication methods governments use for secure messaging.
When Iran receives an email from the US; they write a reply in word 97 and save it to a floppy disk. The floppy disk is loaded into a briefcase and onto a camel that travels 500 miles to the airport. The camel is loaded onto the plane, and it flies straight to the Pentagon. The paperwork processing to unload the briefcase-equipped camel takes 2 weeks of meetings just to sort through. The disk is left on a desk for another week while the peripheral ships from amazon to read it, and then after 5 days, chatgpt translates it.
[+7] u/PositiveToe2761: I’m so excited for the casino to open im shaking! Weird this same shaking happens when I’m not drinking!
[+7] u/Mark_Underscore: Is the current closing of the reopening of the closing of the reopened closed strait already priced in?
[+7] u/big-mo: 🥭 using the Treasury to prop up the market.
[+7] u/twenty_three_three: People should familiarize themselves with Turkey's economy and markets over the last 15 years. Their central bank continued lowering rates in the face of significant inflationary pressure. There were long periods of economic contraction and high inflation. Equities were one of the few assets that were unaffected. Bulls are going to be the winners, even if things go to shit.
[+7] u/ItsRy4n_b: $710 0dte calls tomorrow at open
[+7] u/DressPrestigious7088: If yall thought the markets will crash before midterms, you’re retarded. The markets will keep creating new highs and yall will continue to lose money shorting.
[+7] u/MagJack: you act as if congress is gonna do anything
[+7] u/CPR123_: Most obvious green by open I’ve ever seen
[+7] u/BatingAndTrading: I really wish the market would be open 24/7
[+7] u/Individual_Error_428: Wow, massive green tomorrow
[+6] u/Country_Gravy420: Why is Asia so happy?
[+6] u/Valkyrie_Skuld: Whether you’re a bull or a bear you still misspell both words intentionally
[+6] u/Demonic_Maidens: Guys, everyone sell everything Monday so everything crashes. Everyone can then buy SPY Tuesday for like 300. Infinite money
[+6] u/WendyDumpsterFire: Wow it’s recovery a little bit
[+6] u/Whatevs56: Bulls bought the top again.
[+6] u/Convillious: believe it or not, calls tommorow
[+6] u/StrangeInsanity: Trump has all of us by the balls and we can't do shit about it. Algo's are calibrated to go by headlines, none of the narrative matters, only headlines do. Market kept rewarding him for all his lies and we will pay the price for it.
[+6] u/Historical_Bother274: Bols some of you are alright, dont come to the market tomorrow
[+6] u/No_Locksmith_7965: global adderal shortage
[+6] u/Far-Requirement9180: Bears lmaooooooooooo
[+6] u/pitchingwedge69: You guys fall for the scam it’s crazy. Just buy SPY and hold you fucking morons.
[+6] u/Flea_Mac_Daddy: Word to the wise: when 🍊starts going off on wanting to commit war crimes, etc- it means he's really desperate for a deal. So don't go do something stupid like sell your calls or buying puts.
Only a moron would reenter this conflict.
[+6] u/Phandomtrigger: No way it’s gonna be green trmw that ceasefire is as good as gone at this point
[+6] u/_Fibbles_: ASTS is a drilling company now?
[+5] u/These-Shoulder8017: Spy up 70% in 4 years.
[+5] u/kemar7856: Buy gold not shitcoin
[+5] u/MelkorKush: The bull market was the friends we made along the way.
[+5] u/RDDT_100P: Omg 0.5% the world clearly is ending
[+5] u/OkJester: I guess now we know why he called it "straight of IRAN", they do seem to be owning it 🧐🧐🧐😞
[+5] u/PARABOLIC-Explorer: Bridge and Power Plant day are back on the menu boys.
[+5] u/North3rnLigh7s: lol pure cope. This dumbass is just firing from the hip
[+5] u/spr_crl: Iran War: Season 2 coming soon
[+5] u/Valkorion335786: Red at night is good for calls
[+5] u/Rude_Assistance_4386: Ngl I thought the oil move would be more dramatic
[+5] u/manlymatt83: Tonight’s fortune cookie:
“Your financial situation will soon improve significantly in bed.”
Held puts over the weekend.
Calls it is.
[+5] u/vCharged: Are bears actually going to get a day?
[+5] u/perceptive_AI: Waiting for Amazon to sell cannabis on Amazon Fresh , get your food and cannabis in the same order.
[+5] u/LeoTora: Pretty sure they can send a couch to Islamabad, green by open
[+5] u/ArchegosCapitalCEO: Any big booty Latinas in here?
[+5] u/Muted-South4737: Pfft, that's just the pre-rip
[+5] u/Dry-Syrup-882: Monday open calls are so so easy lmao. It’s been 10 years and some of you retards still can’t learn how to read DJT
[+5] u/akunisg: if you know how to check put call daily volume on optioncharts you wouldn't miss all these green
warning: It's a LOT of CALLs, MSFT, GOOGL, AAPL, you name it
[+18] u/shower_optional: i'm upvoting every stupid bullish SPY number people post and you bers can't stop me
[+15] u/isitdonethen: There’s no way we’re not green by open
[+14] u/I_work_too_much: Honestly I'm not sure why Beyond Meat didn't say fuck it at this point and become Beyond AI.
[+12] u/jazzgrackle: Two people at my work were talking about day trading. One of the front desk people was like “I’m gonna start day trading” and this other lady was like “I trade futures. You just gotta follow your strategy” they started talking about YouTube videos.
Watching people about to lose a shit ton of money was interesting.
[+12] u/NewLifeInAfghanistan: Ah nothing more relaxing than blue light blasting directly into my retinas near midnight to help me feel rested and productive at work tomorrow
[+12] u/PalsRocksMyWorld: Is this entire war just an excuse to pamp the market? People are talking.
[+12] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: # Bers about to get rug pulled for the third week in a row 💀
[+11] u/LordWop: We chopped for 6 months and then barely dropped when actually bad news hit. Now we pump into the stratosphere
[+10] u/Metal-Water: Praying I become profitable one day. Literally got nothing else going for me in life, single, friendless, stuck in a dead end I.T. Job. Hope I get good at this shit.
[+10] u/Dis_shite_rite_her: Starting to think the entire Hormuz thing is priced in.
[+9] u/jazzgrackle: I’m on a plane to Chicago. Don’t they make stocks there?
[+9] u/jerome-yellen: Not even monday and bers already fuk
[+9] u/alakesomewhere: I don’t think I’m ready for another hours long bear market… the last one was painful!
[+9] u/itsamemyusername: I mean.. I would be doing better if I wasn't having to support your mom.
[+9] u/Potential-Plum7187: Iran is all talk no bark, which is why the market’s been mooning. The US vs iran “war” is like a gorilla vs an ant.
[+8] u/AfraidAnalyst: Open by 9:30, book it
[+8] u/Dajoechi: Pucker up bears you know that axios tweet is coming in a few hours.
[+8] u/whyshw: It’s already tomorrow in Asia and most of their markets are green
[+8] u/Apple2o: Imagine getting blown up in the middle of the ocean over dinosaur juice
[+8] u/CoolConfusion3606: Market has zero reason to go down.
[+8] u/skarfbeaulonee: People are saying—very smart people, by the way—that human stupidity has never had a bear market, no correction, nothing. Just straight up—currently at record highs. Nobody’s ever seen anything like it.
[+8] u/jfwelll: Market doesnt care about anything. Ww3? Calls. Growth to almost 0 while inflation way higher? Calls. Supply chain disruption possibility ? Calls. Admin being bunch of pdfiles doing pnd? Calls. Your speculative pennystock turning into multibillion on pure hope and no growth? Calls. Your high beta stock satellite launch? Calls.
Its always calls. Doesnt make sense? Still calls.
[+7] u/GoldenAries4: Wonder if we’ve been seeing a Gamma Squeeze and now that April 17th expiries have passed, it’ll reverse sharply.
[+7] u/Playful-Ad-7277: what do 🐻 even do for a living to afford puts every day
[+7] u/McClintockC: Never forget the great bear market of the first few hours of Sunday afternoon
[+7] u/cashflow_: Can’t chat drinking mich ultras and listening to reggaeton
[+7] u/iswearnotagain10: 🥭 will tweet “talks going well!” at 3 pm and we’ll finish out the day +1%
[+7] u/IllustriousRuin1956: Green by open and 720 eow. We all know it.
[+7] u/ShadyPotatoTrader: “We are not afraid of war” Iranians. 12m ago.
😐
[+7] u/bluen: We r sparta - 300 stronk
[+7] u/WorkingAd7387: BER EXTINCTION EVENT
[+6] u/moosewithamuffin: 4/20 tomorrow means SPY will be GREEN
[+6] u/alex21turner: Checking if I still have flair here after 6 years
[+6] u/ddrsdght: I leave my trash can out for days. My neighbors probably think I’m a piece of shit
[+6] u/OkLength37: Just got a vpn, gonna buy some puts on the Tehran exchange
[+6] u/syedhuda: market gonna pump til the aliens get here
[+6] u/Coogiez: Just bought 100,000 shares of ASTS. See yall in 3-5 yesrs
[+6] u/G000z: Easiest trade of my life, just watch 🥭 backtrack in before market open, buy in pre market tomorrow you'll be grateful
[+5] u/isolated-cat: oil futures are the fakest. bitch should be at 90 min
[+5] u/JewishPride07: This is the bearpocalypse? Friday morning prices 🐻🌈
[+5] u/hayleybts: Asian markets dumped friday n pumped today
[+5] u/LaserGuy626: How is crude futures only 89
[+5] u/Chance-Albatross7809: Why oil moving back down tho? Pricing in taco doesnt make sense anymore since its clear now he cant just open it when he chooses
[+5] u/Dangerous-Ad9962: MRVL calls at open ✅
[+5] u/IDoLikeMyShishkebabs: Almost disappointed my shorts will pay out, knew there'd be some shit happening again over the weekend again though 😒
INTC 6/26 62.5p and a shitload of TSDD
[+5] u/ForTheStreets: For a second I was worried about my calls
Thanks for comforting me guys
[+18] u/AphexPin: There should be a thread where we actually discuss what our moves tomorrow will be to find productive plays
[+17] u/PROMlSED: Talks scheduled: +1% SPY
Talks going well: +2.5% SPY
Agree to ceasefire: +3% SPY
Strait Opened: +3% SPY
Ceasefire broken and Strait closed: -.5% SPY
[+15] u/Mr_Gain_: I swear to Christ if my cousin starts talking about her and her husband trying for a kid again at another family gathering im going to start asking what positions they are trying and how hard do they go at it. Its so fuckin weird when people say that in front of people
[+12] u/Individual_Formal130: Trump got Iran by the pussy.
[+11] u/SuccotashOk5093: NIKKEI IS UP 1% LOL WE GONNA BE GREEN BY OPEN
[+11] u/Heavy-Imagination506: https://preview.redd.it/z39ktve9t9wg1.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=0a35e484b402f34226a96b4b193283cc71366146
[+11] u/FatFluffyFish: Iran continuing talks. LMAO, like clockwork.
[+9] u/SnooHedgehogs5162: Korea and Japan stock market rally again, ATH. They don't care about oil price.
64% up this year already
[+9] u/deevee12: We’ve reached the final stage of TACO. When TACO is permanently priced in so all dips are skipped and we just keep on going higher forever
SPY 1000 by 2028 because why not
[+9] u/NFG89: There will be a Wendy's in downtown Tehran by June.
[+8] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: If 🥭 wants to manipulate the market, he needs to do better. I mean wtf is this? Either drop 10% or pump 20%. Jeez.
[+8] u/geddyclaus: Mandatory drug testing for all employees on 4/21
[+8] u/99Fan: This aint staying red
[+8] u/FatFluffyFish: Waiting for mango man to truth about some ceasefire plan at open as usual
[+8] u/dijon0324: Wait are my $710 puts exp 4/21 not gonna print?
[+7] u/TestingLifeThrow1z: Calls at open is my play.
[+7] u/StandardDot5115: I bury my grass clipping in the backyard so it'll be oil in 10 million years
GENERATIONAL WEALTH
[+7] u/Castopliani: Born too late to finance a farm
Born too early to finance a space colony
Born just in time to finance a Costco hotdog
[+7] u/Sandvicheater: So US strategy was copy and pasting one for Iraq, take out the head leader the military disbands and the oppressed people will rise up and take sides with USA.
EXCEPT, US bombed the major capital cities which contain the liberal democratic element so they're pissed off at USA instead of rising up against regime, the military hardliners were originally stationed and hidden away in mountains and only unified them into a holy Jihad war. And our Middle Eastern allies are now questioning America guarantee of safety when their own backyards are getting bombed back to the stone age by Iran.
Real bang up job there TACO, how does this not devolve into another 20 year desert quagmire or 15 year Vietnam clusterfuck?
[+7] u/b1gb0n312: It's going to open green tomorow isn't it?
[+7] u/Still-One-1665: Jerk off and take Ativan
[+6] u/lamechud: ASTS morons had to pick the CHEAPEST delivery driver possible!
[+6] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: So fckn bullsh rn fck
[+6] u/BigBritches619: I just want my money and my foreskin back
[+6] u/blemdemman: believe it or not, SPY 712 calls
[+6] u/StandardDot5115: elevator up, elevator down
calls on OTIS
[+5] u/Soossaaaa: to be a ber:
the market's natural move is up. being a contrarian means betting against the norm AND getting the timing right.
be a bul
[+5] u/Nomynametoday: Oil up, corn 🌽 down, lets go
[+5] u/OilBull: Damn we really did blow a fucking hole in that tanker LMAO
CALLS AT OPEN NO MATTER WHAT OPENING PRICE
[+5] u/samwehl: Intel going to 100+ is obvious. It didn’t do all this to die now
[+5] u/Happy-n-Healthy: Glad my truck runs on gasoline, oil is ghey AF
[+5] u/Fine_Specialists: No more sports betting for this retard
[+5] u/VeterinarianDear2401: Remember guys Martket MAKERS are required to take the other side of the trade if there are no more buyers left.
[+5] u/thefoeslayer: BULL is abouta go crazy
[+5] u/Vulthen1: Well Nikkei is green
[+5] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: I made a joke about zoomers last time and reddit banned me so I won't do that again
[+12] u/Bazzer82: No-one is ever selling again. No more big dips. Either buy or get left behind. The march of the market stops for no man.
[+12] u/Johnny_Menace: Bears celebrating a 0.57% overnight drop that will be green by open LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!🤣
[+10] u/michaelis999: markets are so retarded man, they'll literally believe anything the orange creature says
[+9] u/Bob_the_peasant: OPEN THE STRAIT
CLOSE THE STRAIT
OPEN THE STRAIT A LITTLE BIT
[+9] u/NotEasyOne_Regard: My wet dream:
RKLB finishes it’s rocket way early.
ASTS says fuck you BlueOrigin.
RKLB and ASTS partner.
[+9] u/WingWorried6176: The real dump comes when Hormuz ACTUALLY opens
[+9] u/regular_user01: Europe (Germany) is down 1.1%. Believe it or not we will be green when market opens
[+8] u/fire_alarmist: Bols, face it. You had a world record short squeeze off a fake war is over announcement , which has now been completely discredited. Oil is going to 200 a barrel and your port going to 0. The cope MUST stop.
[+8] u/Samjabr: No one else to share this with - some dude bought a laptop from me on ebay - after winning and paying , he literally messaged me to ask "Does it work?"
WTF...
[+8] u/itseran: The situation is way worse than friday at close but the markets might recover because it's not as bad as saturday? I love this market this is so funny
[+8] u/Dear_Respond4522: Breaking: man in halloween costume, later identified as bearhunter429, tried to cross the strait on a jetski and was mistaken by a drone for a xenomorph and tactically nuked. Suspicious trades were reportedly made on polymarket just moments before he left.
[+8] u/unhappyreach_: Brownies baked
Brownies eaten
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
[+8] u/Noddite: Big positive news with the negotiations - Vance is sitting it out, which means the bag men are there free to talk money.
[+8] u/LarsTarkas: Kangaroo action tomorrow 🦘
[+8] u/NapNapNapNap: We gonna dump super hard at open
[+7] u/Crazy-Being7729: ASTS calls, 3 month expiration. It’ll go back up
[+7] u/Active_Finish2316: Jerome really put his crown down ima go cry to sleep
[+7] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: im predicting 8 hours and 38 mins til we open 🤌🏻
[+7] u/drizzyjake7447: I still can’t believe how we just ripped through 700 last week after all the cock teases all year
[+7] u/Montyprice7206: It’s crazy how the presidency now is just some guy with a blank check doing random shit
Anyways bullish
[+7] u/FunInternal5087: S&P goes to 750 by Wednesday...!!!
[+7] u/SxeySteve: Lol BB corruption testimony paused. He's gonna keep this war going at any cost
[+7] u/Pikachumon25: Green by open and spy 750 end of week
[+7] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: I cant wait for MMM >!Market Manipulation Monday!< followed by some sweet TT >!Taco Tuesday!<. You already know its gonna be a sweet ass WW >!Winning Wednesday!<. Can't forget TiT >!Triple it Thursday!<, and I kind of have a feeling were gonna have a FF >!Freaky Friday!<. but no matter what BRF >!ber r fuk!<. Jah Bless.
[+6] u/Montyprice7206: All Iran has to do is say they’ll give him a peace price and he’ll let them do whatever they want
[+6] u/touuuuhhhny: Can Barron please place his call options so we can reopen the Strait again
[+6] u/WoodooRanger: Are we opening or closing the straight tomorrow? Sorry, I lost track. Calls right?
[+6] u/Molten-Helldiver: Why can’t we have the luxury of shit happening during market hours so we can make plays..
[+6] u/DuAbUiSai: Not even a 1% dip. Bers are cooked.
[+6] u/corporalboobs: Bruh every single time I buy calls I shoulda bought puts
[+5] u/zephyrs85: What time are we all going to pretend as if futes has any bearing on market open
[+5] u/J_da_CPA: 🌮 Tuesday still on the menu
[+5] u/kinkyhentai69: Tmrw im waking up at 11am fully expecting the market to have recovered by then
[+5] u/early-retirement-plz: I’ve heard a rumor Melania is serving up a feast tmr, burritos, enchiladas and TACOs
[+28] u/oldsguy65: BREAKING: Hormuz is clopensed.
[+26] u/Separate_Fold5168: In a "pick any stock and it goes up market" I pick ASTS and get my fucking dick chopped off.
[+16] u/scrap4crap: Be greedy when others are gay
[+16] u/Intelligent_Heat451: Ima throw 50K in one stock tomorrow yall.
[+16] u/Loperenco: OPEN THE CASINO, YOU CRAZY BASTARDS!
[+15] u/cyril1991: There is no oil shortage in Ba Sing Se.
[+13] u/yyn1999: BELIEVE IT OR NOT - CALLS
[+11] u/Intelligent_Heat451: I thought this was WSB and all you retards are telling me not to place a 50k bet on one stock? What have yall become?
[+11] u/UnivalveX: BREAKING: Strait of Hormuz has now reopened for the 63rd time in 50 days
[+9] u/Weekly_One8412: insiders know Hormuz is opening for real for real this week.
[+9] u/Noble_Bastard: Bol case for today is hoping Barron has calls. Really the only hope, since no data is scheduled for the morning.
[+9] u/Aggressive-Ad-2707: Fake dump. Market only goes up
[+9] u/UnivalveX: fun fact: we've now won the Iran war more than all our war victories in history combined
[+8] u/joycaptain: Red open, green close
[+8] u/Noble_Bastard: Bols going to need a trade talks going well post from 🥭 to save them.
[+8] u/Stonklover6942O: insiders switched to puts at 3:59 then they seized that boat. bulls r fuked until taco tuesday
[+8] u/Aggressive-Use3331: why do some bears wanna see the markets crash even at the expense of their own pockets. Is it a ego thing or some kind of anti establishment sentiment
[+8] u/Sad-Substance8684: Bulls panicking and coming on here to assure each other at a 0.2% pullback - top signal
[+8] u/Intelligent_Heat451: #WHAT STOCK SHOULD I PUT 50K into tomorrow yall.
[+7] u/Weekly_One8412: so you could get more leverage on a -0.5% move? just buy calls.
[+7] u/Due-Information-6277: Bezos laughing at asts investors
[+7] u/Snowman33001: The makeup sex between Iran and the US is gonna be biblical.
That’s why I’m buying calls.
[+7] u/Intelligent_Heat451: These mods are banning people for saying legal things?
[+6] u/Gristle__McThornbody: I think Barron bought.
[+6] u/Willing_Spring2736: Last week I became an expert at internal geopolitics and the flow of various commodities through waterways..this week I will forget all that and just be a ghey bear
[+6] u/CherrySweaty5562: ASTS $109 calls 4dte = free money zzzZZZzzz
[+6] u/Intelligent_Heat451: Should I go all in on ASTS?
[+5] u/silverbulls8: Somehow this will be green tomorrow.. and continue pumping all week.
[+16] u/Reply_Stunning: the markets are actually up compared to friday open
this is fucking ridiculous
[+15] u/__nameless____: turns out this whole time the US has been talking to indian call center scammer about the negotiations
[+12] u/mangofruitdude: What a fuck up by blue origin lmao. Bezos u stupid idiot what u doing bruh?
[+11] u/ThouOne: You guys are worrying about the strait, I’m thinking why is my Yahoo Finance frozen since Friday
[+10] u/ShadowMoneyLurks: Last week's lesson: be greedy when others are fearful
This week's lesson: no idea, but probably calls at some point
[+10] u/Kattilaeikka: It feels like there was a big shift. First there was insider trading because of the decisions regarding Iran. Now it feels like the decisions are made to accomodate insider trading.
[+10] u/sauronII: To sum up: after the war was won, Iran didn‘t open the strait, so the US blocked it too, then the US declared it open and we mooned but when ships tried to pass Iran said it‘s still closed.
Is that sorta what happened?
[+10] u/Small-Maintenance-65: VIX up 12% and SPY down 0.5%… right.
[+9] u/HomeHedgeFund: OPEN THE FUCKIN STRAIT, YOU FUCKIN BASTARDS! Praise Allah
[+9] u/uncorrelatedgambling: No need to watch charts, I know it's going up when bers start downvoting bull comments.
[+9] u/BestZed: Wow I’m shocked that the stock everyone on Reddit said to buy with zero net income is crashing after being up 300% in a year
[+9] u/Knarre30: Complete madness that we arent deeper down yet. Were nearly on the same levels than we are as the strait "opened"
[+8] u/Flat_Scientist8214: Petrol prices? Up. WW III Chances? High. Days? shortening. Weather,? warming, portfolio? diminishing. Hotel? Trivago.
[+8] u/Firm_Passage_6844: iran got puts, they are in this chatroom fr
[+8] u/Far_Addition1210: All the Middle East countries having to sell investments as no Oil money coming in.
[+8] u/puts_every_day: My biggest fear is unfolding right in front of me. A premarket pump into green after a bunch of bad news dropped on the weekend.
[+8] u/tortu995: The ai compute shortage is 10 times more important and relevant than whatever the fck happens at hormuz, hope this helps the bears.
[+8] u/iamfr33agent: AT LEAST BUY ME DINNER BEFORE FUCKING ME
[+8] u/Joonypoo: Intuition telling me an ungodly pump is coming but I can’t put my finger on why
[+8] u/pineapplelover212: Gold pretty stable 👀
[+8] u/myboywears: Bears were calculating profits just 24 hours ago 😂 now they’re all shriveled up by open
[+8] u/Realistic_Robin: Don't worry about the Strait people, it's clopen
[+7] u/RealWooWhee: It’s one thing to buy space stocks (LMAO)
It’s an entirely different level to buy Asts when they literally never hit their own guidance targets but keep believing guys, this time is the time where they do what they promised
[+7] u/Quirky_Push_2506: Iran just closed SPY.
[+7] u/iamfr33agent: Maybe impulsively buying $80,000 of oil on margin was a good idea and will cover my losses from the other positions I'm closing. I'm... ahead?
Holy shit WSHP and USO are balancing my port.
ASTS and Tesla made sense an hour ago. Down 1% each cuz of this post.
BUYING OIL ON MARGIN AND SHITTY WSHP STOCK FOR THE WIN!!!
I WENT FROM -$3500 TO +0!!!
Task failed successfully. Fuck this market.
[+7] u/MainInterview8077: Anyone else having problem seeing S&P500 futures live chart? Or premarket values for stocks on yahoo finance?
[+7] u/Simran-0: Israel on the cuck chair just watching
[+7] u/Simran-0: Who wants to start a submarine oil tanker company with me
[+7] u/Only-Doctor-7577: Mr President, this is so much winning
[+7] u/A55BAG: Earthquake at coast of Japan, Hormuz closed and Nikkei225 at record highs.
What could go wrong 🫣
[https://www.bbc.com/news/live/c07jpy3vxxvt#player](https://www.bbc.com/news/live/c07jpy3vxxvt#player)
[+7] u/DateUser66: I like to walk around the office sighing and swearing. people think im working hard but im really on WSB and losing my monthly income in a day[](https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-d&hs=6NP&sca_esv=1de7a08752d678d6&sxsrf=ANbL-n7kqxuN0mvy5kYPi9d1RstuQybHFw:1776670869201&q=george+costanza&si=AL3DRZHCeZEsX3-CsvvLZIg5Ht46PZnZbl6jY83tWIdoC6qORifveJjelObsQOE47uA3RH9Yx_1Hyxd_PIYK_P4JALnY0FRl53zGVIoGzwwAPF07JhpN-vk%3D&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiGlKrg9vuTAxWUc_UHHRy_BgMQyNoBKAB6BAgaEAA&ictx=1)
[+6] u/Dangerous-Career5793: Longest SNP streak ever was 14 days in April 15, 1971, and bols are still long. Lol.
[+6] u/Harp-Note: Weekend puts are always an obvious move. Too bad they don't actually hold during premarket, and get demolished at open like always lol.
[+5] u/zestykite: Less than 1 percent down. We green by open
[+5] u/Sea-Level-3538: Derrrrrr manipulation. Drrrrr it doesn’t make sense. Drrrrrr. I’m not retarded. 🫵🏾
[+21] u/Free-Championship828: No one wants to short because they know they’re one tweet from being obliterated.
[+12] u/throwawaydonaldinho: So there is no ceasfire, the strait is still closed, virtually nothing has changed from two weeks ago.
SPY is 705$+ still.
This is after going sideways for 6 months below 700$ and dropping on AI high CAPEX, no return bubble fear earnings and the war later on.
Earnings again this month, looks like everything is forgotten already.
Just buy the dip bro…
[+11] u/AbjectProcedure3589: Feel like buying puts is still obvious, so calls it is
[+11] u/ZealousidealGrab1827: WTF am I looking at right here? And, I promise — I didn’t drink last night.
https://preview.redd.it/ckgx4j11kbwg1.jpeg?width=2048&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8ff70657efed50b225e01cdb4d81d55f1de78797
[+10] u/Odd_Hair3829: Can I sue cnbc.com???
[+9] u/Potential_Version_34: Bad news is good news
Good news is good news
News is good news
[+8] u/BadBoyBilbo: CNBC app glitching HARD.
Futes up 10% lol
[+8] u/JohnnyFartmacher: https://www.cnbc.com/ has the S&P500 premarket up by 9%.
if only...
[+8] u/ComposerLast7741: “Pakistan isn’t even coming to the table!!”
Good.
This isn’t negotiation, this is god tier American diplomacy. We showed up, shook our own hand, declared victory, and ordered dessert.
Markets blood green at open.
[+8] u/UnknownM007: Euro algos waiting for the 🌮
[+8] u/NocturnalCereal: This market so crazy it needs it’s own psych ward
[+8] u/staburself321: How many bul quit their job because of CNBC? That 6am fuck you text to the boss must have felt great lol
[+7] u/hkusbeckham: The world does not care about the war now. We green today
[+7] u/WeenieWang_: # Not a tweet, it's called a skill issue. LMFAOOOOO
[+7] u/Soffatjockis: Mango will tweet before market open just like always so his buddies can position themselves before retail gets fucked.
[+7] u/tika_dengu: AMZN should be down by 10%+ for screwing up ASTS launch.
[+6] u/Yasqweenn: Full port spy calls it is
[+6] u/cryptobugle: U Bols thought IRan was just gonna open the straight? Lmaoooo
[+6] u/marawki: Bad news -0.5%, a glimpse of hope +2%. You and I know spy is green before the markets even open. 😌
[+6] u/thestudmffn: I was gonna buy some puts, but then I got high
[+6] u/Walking72: Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
No more
📉
[+5] u/Smuvmuniz: Iran might talk now this is some bs
[+5] u/dmk_world: Big green all week, ber in disbelief
[+5] u/_IsNull: So trump is negotiating on Monday while attacking Iran.
[+5] u/Moist_Chain_POL: Aljazeera: Iran has decided to continue talks with the US, but this “does not mean to negotiate at any cost” and to accept any “approach the other party practises”.
Iran has set red lines, and these “must be observed”, he said.
When asked whether Iran will send a team to Islamabad, Aziz suggested that it depends on whether Tehran receives positive signs.
“We have never feared the principle of negotiation. Perhaps today or tomorrow, with further assessment, we consider it likely, providing that the American negotiating team and the messages they have received from Iran give a positive signal,” he said.