▶ Full Post Text
[+276] u/DeathFlameStroke: Short term pain for long term pain
[+173] u/ercanbas: Never seen anything like this in all my five days of trading oil.
[+129] u/Extreme_Green_1708: Hey I’m here in San Diego - I see a boat with a big wooden horse floating up to the shore. Could be a gift from Iran?
[+119] u/Flashy-Finger-8600: Buffett- “ I don’t time the markets”
Proceeds to hold 400B hoping for a crash.
Buffett is therefore a closeted ghey bear.
[+115] u/Val44x: We pumped from 658 to 680 when they said war was over
Since then about 5 tankers have sustained damage in the strait and Iran says we won’t surrender
We are still in the 670s
[+108] u/Throwawayforyoink1: Have they tried storing oil on the blockchain?
[+94] u/HonestScar7176: “U.S. Navy not ready to escort tankers in the Strait of Hormuz yet; escorts could start later this month.”
Could? Later??????????????????
We are fucked!!!!!!!
These guys have no idea what they are doing, they didn’t even think of this when they started this war.
[+78] u/orsomeshitidk: I’ve never understood people who are proud of hating school and reading and shit like, it’s okay to be retarded brother but let’s not advocate for it being the norm
[+75] u/kryptonyk: If all this isn’t enough for a real crash, imagine the face-ripping rally when the war ends.
[+68] u/ebitdasga: US went into this with zero plan to secure Hormuz which was Iran’s only move. We must have the dumbest admin in history
[+64] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: Some of y'all in here voted for 🥭 because he's "good for markets" 🤡
[+61] u/Axwe8: ####REMINDER UR **WENDYS SHIFT** 🍔🍟 IS **NOT CANCELLED** JUST BECAUSE 🥭 SAYS THERE'S DRONES OFF THE **WEST COAST** 🤡 🤡 🤡
[+59] u/Unlucky252: How tf do I trade this market, every move seems like a bad one
[+56] u/Mark_Underscore: The war is going to get so bad they will use the Epstein files to distract us
[+54] u/WingedScapula420: Remember when we declared that Tylenol causes autism? Good times.
[+49] u/happy30thbirthday: I am starting to think that Trump may not be the genius he says he is
[+47] u/Aware-Teacher5389: “The Dow is over 50k” - Pam Bondi
[+46] u/SquirtleStomp: "America launched investigations into several of its trading partners, including the eu, China, Japan and India. The probes will examine their alleged “excess capacity and production in manufacturing sectors”, but are seen as a precursor for the administration to raise new duties on imports."
We got trade wars, cold wars, hot wars, what's next? Star wars????
[+46] u/KittyLover-7: I can cause the mother of all crashes by buying in, but I wont do that to you guys
[+46] u/BourbonRick01: They say that the toughest part of a 4 week war in the Middle East, is the first 6 years. So we just need to hold on a bit longer, and then we can slowly withdrawal and act like we won, just like Iraq and Afghanistan.
[+45] u/Disconn3cted: Listen. I'll escort the ships. I've got nothing to live for.
[+43] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: YOUR FUEL AND ENERGY COSTS MAY DRASTICALLY INCREASE BUT THAT'S A SACRIFICE I'M WILLING TO MAKE. ONLY IDIOTS ACTUALLY PAY THEIR BILLS ANYWAY. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.
[+41] u/sytena10: Energy Secretary says U.S. ‘not ready’ to escort tankers through Strait of Hormuz, but definitely has concepts of a plan
[+37] u/FlyingLineman: 🥭 should announce a competition
First tanker captain to make it across the straight gets a million dollars and a 3 day stay at mar-a-lago with a drink voucher
[+36] u/billyd1984texas: 🥭 finally did it. Something so dumb he cant taco out of
[+35] u/Zimoula: The people who are $36 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score
[+34] u/Sensitive_Pilot3689: I have experience with underwater mines based on Super Mario
[+33] u/WarenBoffet: crazy to think republicans argumented for decades that we need guns to defend againts abusive governments,
and now that its time, their siding with the abusive government, what a bunch of pussies
[+33] u/Sad-Substance8684: Simply incredible how wall st can engineer a transfer of bags in such a tight price range
[+33] u/orsomeshitidk: I really hope the new supreme leader doesn’t do something heinous, like cyber attack my wife’s student loans. That would be *terrible*
[+32] u/sftheory: Fuk this. Goona go upstairs and watch my wife do her yoga 😍
[+30] u/cbusoh66: Spent $2.3 trillion to replace the Taliban with the Taliban
We replaced a Khamenei with a Khamenei for only $20 billion.
[+29] u/Appropriate_Sky_4509: Wake up son
We have to catch as many clams as we can before the tide rises
Otherwise no dinner.
[+29] u/Les7X: Oil should be listed on crypto exchanges by now. Oh wait, it phisically exists and has a real purpose. Nevermind
[+29] u/Concerned_Fanboy: # The Israeli military announced that it has begun another widescale wave of attacks on Iran.
[+27] u/I_work_too_much: What if we just set all the boats on fire ourselves then push them through the strait and then put them out. Like in the movies when the good guy shoots the civilian the terrorist is hiding behind and then the terrorist is totally fucked then you find out the civilian is totally okay and a fucking gunshot wound to the shoulder is no big deal and they hug.
Or maybe I just didn't get enough sleep last night after drinking myself unconscious.
[+27] u/apurimac777: Our navy, despite its insane strength and successes in this war on Hadjis, is too fake and gay to escort tankers through the straight of Homo?
I thought the whole fucking point of our military was to secure supply chains so we can enjoy cheap shit at Walmart and pay a quarter what eurofags do for gas 🤬
[+25] u/Cav829: Okay, but Kamala's laugh was really annoying.
[+25] u/AlasKansastan: Every fucking time something good happens Donald fucks it up
[+25] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Send the wallstreet guys to the draft first so we can have a fair market
[+24] u/orsomeshitidk: Wild how much of this could have been avoided had someone just made 🥭 an ambassador to some bullshit country and gave him a reality television show about it called “the Oval” or something
[+24] u/UsernameTaken_123: The FIFA Peace Price used to mean something
[+24] u/boztron: To the dumbasses who voted for this… f you
[+24] u/financiallythriving: Imagine being deep in the red from options trading but still continue to trade thinking you can come back
[+24] u/zmarrano91: BREAKING: 🥭 sends Jake Paul to open Straight of Hormuz
[+23] u/HDauthentic: Watch out boys, there’s mines in the options contracts
[+23] u/CallsOrPutsYES: #RELEASE THE FILES, I MEAN UNEMPLOYMENT DATA
[+23] u/McKoijion: It’s kind of nuts how Trump renamed the Defense Department the Department of War, but refuses to call the attack on Iran a war.
[+23] u/Red_Zone_Broly: #🚨TRUMP: "WHEN OIL PRICES GO UP, WE MAKE A LOT OF MONEY"
We?
[+23] u/Successful-End7689: escorting tankers is wild lol this shit was not well thought out
[+22] u/Skilledthunder: "Netflix may have paid $600 million for Ben Affleck’s AI startup"
what the fuck is even going on
[+22] u/AegonTheMeh: > Jim Cramer: If the infrastructure is not taken out and the money is not taken away why should Iran come to the peace table. They are taunting us with $200 oil. They do not have the cards; our military must be unleashed. Time to do what we did to Hanoi...to get them to the table
https://x.com/jimcramer/status/2032113911089005003
Don’t even know how to inverse this one
[+22] u/orsomeshitidk: When I’m dead don’t put “husband, father, son, brother” on my headstone put “helped increase shareholder value for pedos” on that bad boy
[+21] u/popsferragamo: This situation looks unTACOable. Iran has demands which Israel is unlikely to accept. Oh, and the US will just do what Israel says
[+21] u/Dependent_Bike_3112: yesterday was my cat's 4th birthday. hope she has 400 more
[+21] u/Whole_Tea_4383: BREAKING NEWS : JEROME POWELL IS TAKING MATTERS INTO HIS OWN HANDS AND HE IS REOPENING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ - BLOOMBERG REPORTS
[+21] u/Leather_Mention5916: Wat a world.. People glued to the screen waiting for a tweet of a demented pedo billionaire hoping it makes some money.
[+21] u/MrYOLOMcSwagMeister: Get ready for some bullshit price action today!
[+21] u/spectra444: https://preview.redd.it/fur33nea7mog1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=87de6c86001132afe0eedce91d122dba2bc4cea3
[+21] u/probablyuntrue: Leader of Iran is Khamenei
Ten billion bombs later
Leader of Iran is Khamenei
[+21] u/ihopethisworksfornow: I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think Mango might have actually fucked himself this time.
[+20] u/SaveTheAles: US government announces half of strategic oil reserve will be released every day and it will never run out.
[+20] u/TopKekBoi69: Boomers have ruined this country
[+20] u/looool_k_libtard: There is nothing more patriotic than paying $15 for gas and being drafted. Stop fucking crying! This is very important war for all of us!
[+20] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: > 🚨TRUMP ON OIL: The United States is the largest Oil Producer in the World, by far, so when oil prices go up, we make a lot of money."
We make a lot of money? We who? Fuck you 🥭!
[+20] u/MoustacheMark: https://preview.redd.it/u6enyxlojmog1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c8315763fbe4e50230ca1a5e321d24a0ee380928
[+20] u/BalanceWide4735: lets blame israel for this shit
[+20] u/yyn1999: Bro this guy is unreal. Starts a war in iran and then blames powell. just wow
[+20] u/portfoliorating: # SHORT-TERM PAIN FOR LONG-TERM PAIN
[+19] u/borkdpasito: Bols. I understand what drives you. I understand your nature.
You don’t have to become ber. Just become oily bols.
Long USO - the time has come.
Profit off 🥭’s incompetence
[+19] u/bigmeatbag: Donnie fucking my portfolio like it's a thirteen year old girl.
[+19] u/Pitiful-Ad769: As an Australian I honestly cannot believe you are putting up with this shit. If our prime minister did half of this fuckery, both left and right would lynch him. How is it that you allow a pedo, who is not only breaking the constitution but shamelessly lying, starting foreign wars, going back on promises, and ruining the economy objectively, to continue leadership. If he was pumping stocks maybe, but that hasn’t happened. He can’t even deport more than Obama.
[+19] u/Tall_Helicopter_833: If you are ever feeling bad about yourself just know some Americans believe bombing random countries makes them more safe. At least you aren’t that dumb
[+19] u/Bichael-Murry: *You appeared in 12 searches this week, on LinkedIn*
# WHERE DO I SIGN AUTOGRAPHS
[+18] u/McKoijion: The question isn’t when will Trump choose to TACO, it’s when Iran will let him.
[+18] u/cardboard-junkie: Feels like the market is dying to dump but it keeps getting hopium’d up
[+18] u/HistorianMuch8963: Will it V like it did the last 350 times?
Or were those last 350 times just conditioning you to expect the V that won’t happen this time?
[+18] u/McKoijion: > THE UNITED STATES IS THE LARGEST OIL PRODUCER IN THE WORLD, BY FAR, SO WHEN OIL PRICES GO UP, WE MAKE A LOT OF MONEY. BUT, OF FAR GREATER INTEREST AND IMPORTANCE TO ME, AS PRESIDENT, IS STOPING AN EVIL EMPIRE, IRAN, FROM HAVING NUCLEAR WEAPONS, AND DESTROYING THE MIDDLE EAST AND, INDEED, THE WORLD. I WON’T EVER LET THAT HAPPEN! THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. PRESIDENT DONALD J. TRUMP
Now he’s claiming rising oil prices are a *good* thing. I also appreciate the royal we lol.
[+18] u/leeuwvanvlaanderen: *Bol gang realises the Admin actually had no plan*
[+18] u/gavbot_1213: I fucking hate him so fucking much god damnit
[+18] u/Retaining-Wall: Ooooh yeah iSrAeL wAs GoNnA Do iT wE hAd nO ChOiCe.
Simple solution:
"Do your thing Israel but I'ma sit this one out, it seems kinda retarded. Ok? Let us know if you need lemonade or some bombs or smth."
[+18] u/---Right--Tackle---: #These bags are getting heavy as fuck
[+18] u/Far-Requirement9180: He bought? Keep it flat. He sold? Keep it flatter LMAOOOOOOOOO
[+17] u/jonneh: **8:38 AM EST**
#
> Goldman Sachs raised its U.S. inflation forecast and cut its 2026 growth outlook, warning that higher oil prices linked to the Iran conflict are the main economic risk.
>
> The bank expects Brent crude to average $98 in March–April, potentially $110 if flows through the Strait of Hormuz are disrupted for a month, before easing to $71 by Q4 2026.
>
> Goldman now sees headline PCE at 2.9% and core PCE at 2.4% by end-2026, while GDP growth is cut to 2.2%.
>
> **With inflation stickier, the bank expects the Federal Reserve to delay its first rate cut to September.**
[+17] u/isolated-cat: WRIGHT: TRUMP IS CONCERNED ABOUT RISING ENERGY PRICES DURING THIS SHORT-TERM PERIOD
oh he is concerned now is he? almost like they didn't think of the consequences of this war
[+17] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BREAKING: President Trump is "enthusiastic" about continuing the war in Iran for at least another 3-4 weeks even as oil prices rebound, per Axios.
Details include:
1. Following a G7 call, France's President Macron said "no one can tell what Donald Trump wants from this war"
2. US and Israel have not secured the 450 kilograms of highly enriched uranium that Iran holds
3. US and Israel reportedly "do not entirely agree on what winning looks like"
4. "We don't want to leave early, do we? We gotta finish the job, right," Trump said
US stocks are now down over -1% on the day.
[+17] u/ComfortableWolf779: 🥭turns everything he touches to shit
[+17] u/Non-mon-xiety: Reminder that 🥭 could have literally done nothing during his presidency and we’d be better off rn
[+17] u/Wowmuchrya: Damn rednecks really gona be paying $10 per gallon on $8 salaries with 52% apy loans on their f1shitty50s.
Enjoy.
[+17] u/srnx: its actually crazy how rich we would all be under another 4 years of Biden
[+17] u/dddman85: This market is fucking rigged
[+17] u/arothen: I feel like we should look at what ✡️ officials have to say about this war more than US officials.
[+17] u/adwise27: >Le Official Epic Jobs Report
> +24,000,000 blue collar jobs actual vs +4,000 estimate
> -100,000,000 woke mind virus jobs vs +40,000,000 estimate
[+17] u/SoloOutdoor: Things the scrum master forgot to do:
* secure the port
* fill the reserves
* rebuild the minesweeper
* preconfigure the patriots
* disable the internet
* jam drone frequencies
They just deployed the test code right into production. Fuck it
[+17] u/zeusbox: What if Khamenei had calls and just tweets "War is over" and right after 📈📈 📈 he full ports puts and tweets again saying "...if we get to pick Isreal's new leader" 📉 📉 📉
[+17] u/BrainMale: Market has not been the same since Reddit took our large emojis away. Green shrek and red Clifford you are missed
[+17] u/FullCopy: Breaking: Lufthansa and other carriers are considering coal as alternative to jet fuel
[+16] u/DefiantDelta: calls on false flags
[+16] u/Such_Coin: NEARLY HALF OF AMERICANS BLAME 🥭 FOR SURGING GAS PRICES
Would be interesting to find out who the other half blame.
[+16] u/Tay_Tay86: American farmer in shambles. China won't buy the bumper crop soybeans.
Jacked up fertilizer prices.
Jacked up diesel costs for tractors.
In shambles
[+16] u/Retaining-Wall: The fuckin' kicker amidst all this is the Ayatollah had a cancer diagnosis, was what like 9000 years old and was bound to die soon anyway. But T-dogg went and blew him up and now Iran is fuckin pissed and banned straights in the Hormuz. Gay ships only.
[+16] u/McKoijion: “The oil shock is temporary, keep holding your stocks”
-The top donors to AIPAC
[+16] u/corndog_messiah: Let’s be real, the US is toast long term. You can’t just allow yourself to be 70% retarded (conservative estimate) and expect to stay at the top. If nothing changes (all evidence points to nothing changing) it’s game over sooner or later. Many of you won’t agree and you are the proof that it’s true
[+16] u/TacticalTackleBox: Trading during this admin is such a crap shoot. Yes markets change, but this shit changes by the hour. Only way to survive is to scalp the shit out of it
[+16] u/SaveTheAles: With fertilizer prices increasing, I've been supplementing by shitting in my neighbors yard.
[+16] u/Cat_Booger: Man, made 100k earlier in the year then Trump happened and lost it all...never mentally recovered from trading after losing it all.
Shit just went down hill after that, got laid off, my car broke down...fuck me man
The cards are stacked against me right now
[+16] u/No_Current3675: Honestly, just astonishing that retards voted for this.
[+16] u/bearhunter429: #How is your 3-day-special-military-operation going? LMAO🤌
[+16] u/zmarrano91: SPY closing at 666 going into Friday the 13th
[+15] u/KittyLover-7: Strait of Hormuz must remain closed as ‘tool to pressure enemy,’ Iran’s new supreme leader says
Lmaooo, bro has mango by the fucking balls
How did you not have any contingency plan going into this
[+15] u/Ok-Analysis4121: Ok cool so literally the only way to make money is buy calls or puts and holding for 5 seconds
[+15] u/Hardbun: I'm going to throw my phone in a lake if it rejects for the 6th time
[+15] u/Jynx91: We are just gambling over the arguments of a bunch of death eaters as they slurp up their adrenochrome milkshakes.
[+15] u/Th4tR4nd0mGuy: It’s Thursday, so whatever Trump says for the next 24 hours, put your money on the opposite.
This is financial advice.
[+15] u/McKoijion: Trump’s message is now “there’s going to be extreme short term economic pain, but it’s going to be worth it to destroy Iran in the long term.” This is the clearest sell signal I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I honestly feel bad for slow moving financial institutions compared to nimble retail traders.
[+15] u/JaredFlys: Can someone hurry up and impeach 🥭
[+15] u/HonestScar7176: You morons literally bought the dip cause said the war is probably over. Yet they now have a younger leader whose whole family was just killed.and the USA literally just said there is no immediate risk of Iran collapsing lol.
[+15] u/orsomeshitidk: 🥭 got the tiger by the tail with this shit lol i can’t believe when i was a kid i thought adults knew wtf they were doing.
[+15] u/legible_print: So 🥭 started a war with a rogue state that, even though it has diminished military capabilities, can just fuck with the Strait of Hormuz and, through that, totally fuck with our economy. Like it is turning a light switch on and off.
That’s it. We found it. Pure, uncut stupidity.
[+15] u/LasyKuuga: If I buy puts here📈
If I buy calls here📉
[+15] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: It's crazy to see how tariff day caused a meltdown yet this continued conflict that represents something far worse isn't properly priced in yet.
[+15] u/Ble_h: Sleepy joe would have us at 800 by now. I demand a redo this midterm.
[+15] u/Thotmas01: Days like today remind me I need to work for a living and can’t yet afford to lose my job.
[+15] u/orsomeshitidk: This admin couldn’t subjugate Minnesota and yall really think they gonna wrap this Iran shit up with a bow lmao
[+15] u/hey-coffee-eyes: FIFA Peace Prize winner says Iran should skip World Cup for their safety from war he started.
[+15] u/throwawaydonaldinho: Tomorrow is friday the 13th. How fucking cool would it be to have a circuit breaker on F13?
[+15] u/G0RD0N_CLARK: Remember, there’s always money in the banana stand.
[+14] u/HonestScar7176: Wait so Iran now just has a younger leader? Who’s father and wife we just killed? How is that a good thing?
[+14] u/2020isgreat: US Energy Secretary Wright: 172m barrels released in return for 200m back within a year
So they really did just sell spot and buy backend LMFAO EDIT: I'm wrong they haven't done this yet doesn't seem like they've started buying back end for this they most likely just used swaps for the market manipulation
[+14] u/maplessbastard: Face it. Bers fuk. Bols fuk.
[+14] u/orsomeshitidk: Have they considered air dropping onlyfans coupons over Tehran?
[+14] u/A_small_Chicken: I’m starting to think the wokes run this country better
[+14] u/bigmeatbag: This is all George Washington's fault for setting up a system where a regard like Donnie could be put in charge.
[+14] u/LisaSu92: BRING BACK SLEEPY JOE
The hero we need
[+14] u/modder9: Had today’s SPY chart open on my phone at checkout and it scanned as a 12 pack of diet Dr Pepper.
[+14] u/gkdjsl: At some point you have to admire America's apathy as he speedruns imperial decline. I guess nothing is real anymore until it impacts you personally.
[+14] u/Glock7enteen: It was called the strait of muz before your mom crossed it
[+14] u/hermeskino715: That's it? That was the V? Lol
[+14] u/A_small_Chicken: Do the based thing JPow and raise the rates
[+14] u/No-Insurance100: I can't wait for a generation of Zoomer traders who have only known up up up (the micro crash for 2 weeks in 2020 doesn't count) to get totally washed by constraints in the boring physical economy
[+14] u/BarbellPadawan: That’s it… I’m going full Roth SPY puts like the one guy.
[+14] u/Tall_Helicopter_833: The Palantir ceo seems really excited about the Iran war. Reminder most CEOs of large companies are psychopaths
[+14] u/dsubpo: I for one am happy to pay more to drive to the job I'll lose to AI so I can afford fewer things and live a shorter life thanks to the data center pollution thats helping them take my job
[+14] u/Sea_Trip_8941: The president said high oil prices is good for America 🤪
[+14] u/NlNJANEER: Me thinks there’s no chance this ends without troops on the ground
[+14] u/Ok_Environment_3618: A Morning Consult poll shows 48% of Americans hold President Trump responsible for rising gas prices, higher than any other factor. Gas has jumped over 20% in the past month, averaging $3.60 per gallon, driven by global tensions and the Iran conflict.
While the administration calls the spike “short-term,” public frustration is mounting as gas costs hit an 11-day rise streak. Only 16% blame oil companies, 13% global markets, and 11% cite former President Biden.
11% blaming Biden 😂😂. Bruh, why this country so dumb as fuck?
[+14] u/neutralpoliticsbot: Movie idea:
Guy shorts oil at $100 and when the trade goes against him he has to travel to Hormuz and pilot the tankers himself dodging Iranian drones, so his shorts pay.
[+14] u/UsernameTaken_123: A second margin call has hit my portfolio.
[+14] u/TraipseTraveller: Starting to think college is a scam..
[+14] u/Wonderful-Tomato-829: I am sure the new younger ayatollah khamenei who just lost his father, wife, and daughter to the us invasion is surely down for peace and isn't thinking about setting everything on fire
[+14] u/Scared-Signature-452: After this is over, Solar energy, Nuclear energy and Toyota will rip. Because no one will ever buy a pickup truck again
[+14] u/Comfortable733: My options 👉 $0.01
Still have hope
[+14] u/soad1331: Where is the Federal Reserve Chairman, Jerome “Too Late” Powell, today? He should be dropping Interest Rates, IMMEDIATELY, not waiting for the next meeting! 🥭
Not even TACOing just begging now
[+14] u/NotMe357: "JUST IN: U.S. Treasury Secretary suggests an international coalition will start escorting vessels through the Strait of Hormuz as soon as possible."
TACO start the war and now he wants everyone to help him lol.
[+14] u/LURKER21D: Did you even salute for Israel today?
[+14] u/Proton404x: # okay we need to get to the bottom of these files. Our president is a pedo and ruining my life
[+14] u/One_Impression_2253: my puts are up BIGLY! i just don’t own them anymore that’s the issue
[+14] u/Bichael-Murry: # LOWER LOWS AND LOWER HIGHS
# THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
[+14] u/drizztdourdern: Pam Bondi really called the top didn’t she
[+14] u/PompeiiSketches: The FIFA peace prize committee probably feeling pretty silly right now
[+14] u/Doc_Vapor: Literally the dumbest shit in the world bouncing between a 5 dollar range while time decays away.
[+14] u/ResponsibleValue7745: All my homies hate 🥭
[+14] u/sonofalando: Everyone ready for mass unemployment? Cracks are forming.
[+14] u/PutSpreadDaddi69: Be honest you don’t know shit about oil. You just drool and dislike the prez and think Middle East conflict bad oil go up
[+14] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: Genocide supporting Civilian surveilling and warmongering …I’d rather be fuckin homeless than put a dime in evil palantir… you should too
[+14] u/mrsweettreats: 🥭 you fool, what have you done?
[+13] u/McKoijion: Alex Karp is one of the most evil human beings on on Earth. Dude has done more to hurt Americans than almost anyone.
[+13] u/habfranco: New Ayatollah making first statement just before stock market open. Dude knows what he's doing.
[+13] u/Awuxy: God i hate war time trading
[+13] u/Snoo_9489: If this goes to 665 today ill get a WSB tattoo on my left butt cheek
[+13] u/Slightlybadpicks: Oil getting expensive doesn’t bother me at all. I used to fill $20 worth of gas then I’ll continue filling $20 worth of gas now 😏😏😏
[+13] u/Gom_KBull: # Oh. Bols still think this is an "excursion" OK LMAO
[+13] u/soad1331: Spread them cheeks bols 🌈
[+13] u/Disconn3cted: It's gonna be green. The market is manipulated and fake. If the war doesn't end in a few weeks oil will get shorted squeezed though, so have fun with that.
[+13] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: If we get drafted who is gonna buy the dip?
[+13] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: The market really didn’t price in the consequences of oil shortage.. IEA said it will take MONTHS to get back to normal production even if the war stops now
[+13] u/LargeBagHolder: Red premarket is green day, load up
[+13] u/Specialist_Fig9458: If we get a bingo of war with Iran plus private credit meltdown plus ai circlejerk pop it would be keno
[+13] u/Concerned_Fanboy: Imagine believing in mythical shit like peak oil or social security as an adult lol
[+13] u/Early-Elderberry-150: I just wanna go back to being a teenager, playing cod zombies with my friends until 3 am
[+13] u/OkSuccotash258: Quick! Let's do Cuba to distract from the Strait of Hormuz hoax!
[+13] u/yyn1999: In 10 years this war will be called "the epstein war"
[+13] u/slightly_visibleRibs: Good morning to everyone except people who bought Nvidia at 210 and reddit at 240
[+13] u/probablyuntrue: How could 🅱️iden mine the Strait of Hormuz
[+13] u/louis-debroglie: > WRIGHT: U.S. PLANS TO HAVE MORE BARRELS OF OIL IN STRATEGIC RESERVE A YEAR FROM NOW DESPITE RELEASE
Is it not clear how badly these idiots are scrambling right now? And you're buying???
[+13] u/bigmeatbag: This is somehow Obama's fault.
[+13] u/QuantumFreakonomics: A complication of being long oil futures is that I am now pro-tanker fires.
[+13] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: I can feel each red candle up in my ass
[+13] u/J_da_CPA: Iran with the 200 IQ move
🥭 looking dumbfounded
[+13] u/orsomeshitidk: Grief is a weird deal, man. My little brother took his own life close to 6 years ago now and while I think of him every day still, most days now are good. But then randomly will just be overwhelmed with the loss and sadness of it. Shits not cool.
Wild that we all have these traumas build up through a lifetime and then just gotta get old and die at the end of it all lol.
[+13] u/31andnotdone: make a new low you pussy
[+13] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: "We make a ton of money when oils high"
Another lil slip
[+13] u/AlarmedPelican: bloomberg talking about jake paul
fuck this market
[+13] u/Ok-Piano8789: man reddit ai moderation is so bugged and retarded its insane. another 3 day ban for "threatening violence" when im literally just innocuously referring to the war. not threatening or advocating for anything whatsoever.
[+13] u/Sweaty-Sherbet-6926: "Detached from reality" is pretty on brand for this administration TBH
[+13] u/yyn1999: bulls celebrating every 0.2% counter rallye
[+13] u/Valkorion335786: Kind of surprised the Epstein files aren’t on a ship right now in the Strait
[+13] u/BuzzBuckley: If this administration is "So Transparent" ...why haven't I seen any photos of Pam Bondi's feet?!
[+13] u/Toothlesskinch: I kinda feel like "Iranian submersible stealth drones" was something that didn't get nearly enough attention leading up to this.
[+13] u/PositiveToe2761: My favorite meme stock the s&p 500 etf
[+13] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Everyone saying we won and it’s over because we fucked up their Air Force and Navy are either 11 years old or have been in a coma for 20 years.
Like come the fuck on
[+13] u/SuffiecientSapian: Spy has been flat 6 months straight what the actual fuck
[+13] u/civillyRange: 🥭 straight of hormuz is fine Iran war is over
-video of burning tanker LMAO
[+13] u/pleasestoptalkin: If you bought SPY six months ago, you have actually lost money due to inflation. Congratulations.
[+13] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: I can’t believe this is my adult penar size
[+13] u/smellyfingernail: Bears fell for it again award
[+13] u/Disconn3cted: 4 years ago, on this exact date, there was a circuit breaker. Take from that what you will
[+13] u/Apple2o: Tell me how tf I just spent 25$ at Dennys what the fuck
Useless toilet paper currency
[+13] u/borkdpasito: Mfers dont understand that America suffers when oil is expensive - literally everything will get more expensive and inflation will pop off. Expensive oil is bearish af
[+13] u/Impressive-Mud-3362: Mango would have gotten much higher rating by doing absolutely nothing in last two years
[+13] u/Aggravating_Sir_4709: This market has an obsession with buying the dip at all cost. Algos truly don't care how bad macro gets long-term, and that's concerning when things actually break down. The collapse will come at a surprise moment.
[+13] u/Glock7enteen: I can end all of this right now by buying one oil put
[+13] u/Bam2458: They should remove circuit breakers. If the market wants to be 0 let it be 0. A true free market.
[+13] u/Comfortable733: On my 6th beer in the office 😵💫
[+13] u/OrdinaryMix4013: Donnie boy moving the goal post from war is over to it will be over soon lmaoooo dementia kicking in
[+13] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Imagine believing a word that comes out of Scott Bessent’s mouth you’d have to genuinely be so retarded you’d need a helmet
[+13] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: 🥭: "pleas saar JPow pleas lower the rates saar my sponsaars will kill mi saar"
[+13] u/Apple2o: Least it’s not campbells, remember the CEO said that shit is for poor people
[+12] u/-TrueFacts-: Is it too farfetched to say that all-encompassing consumer capitalism depends on people having an IQ of around 90 in today's US terms? Obviously 90 today was the average (100) a few decades ago due to the Flynn effect. At a certain level of intelligence you care almost nothing about advertised goods and shoes and reality TV and travel and such nonsense.
A highly intelligent people that were also naturally healthy just wouldn't need a lot of the products and services that make the economy go round.
[+12] u/Abe2025: Iraq shuts down oil port... yeah this war aint ending soon
[+12] u/harryburton420: 100 WSB members vs 1000 mines in the Strait
[+12] u/solidsneeze: I want to shake the hands of the people who convinced girls to wear today's gym pants 🍖
[+12] u/Ble_h: Have you said thank you once?
[+12] u/orsomeshitidk: So, about them epstine files?
[+12] u/2020isgreat: USS Gerald R. Ford experienced a fire, not combat-related.
How fucking incompetent are we[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2032102756236861879)
[+12] u/portfoliorating: # The United States is the largest Oil Producer in the World, by far, so when oil prices go up, we make a lot of money.
some copium for Thursday, bro
[+12] u/---Right--Tackle---: #This has not been a very cash money presidency
[+12] u/harryburton420: 1000 WSB members swimming through the strait would stop the war
[+12] u/ckami_91: Exxon +30% YTD
Nvidia -3% YTD
LMAOOO
[+12] u/NotEasyOne_Regard: Here I am in life. At 31, recently single, sad and maybe depressed and trying to get 100.000€ (yes, I am an europoor) for a home of my own. Things are cloudy lately.
At least I have you, the regards of WSB. I have the memes, the jokes, the loss and win posts.
Thank you people.
[+12] u/TowelOld743: Remember when they told us Iraq was going to take no longer than 6 months, and we ended up staying for 8 years... Pepperidge Farm remembers
[+12] u/Wowmuchrya: Retarded ass bulls stared at truth social for 7 hours just to get -1.5%d LMAO
[+12] u/Early-Elderberry-150: Someone pls distract 🥭 and tell him his ballroom is on fire
[+12] u/Hot_Philosopher_6558: If this continues, my grandchildren will inherit my bag and break even.
[+12] u/Tall_Helicopter_833: If there’s one thing inbred mouth breathing Americans hate it’s expensive gas.
[+12] u/Austin_Destroyer: Kangaroo market today. Straight up at open, straight down at 10:40, recover from 11:40 into lunch, dump at 12:02, recover at 12:20, pump til 2:45, dump til 3:50, pump til 4:15, crater AH, recover by open. Repeat.
[+12] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Orange man had no idea bibi had photos of him blowing bubba. Otherwise, he wouldn't have run to be in office.
[+12] u/TheBlueBlaze: > Chris Wright, the U.S. energy secretary, said Thursday that it was “quite likely the case” that the U.S. Navy could begin escorting ships through the Strait of Hormuz by **the end of the month**.
> “It’ll happen relatively soon, but it can’t happen now. We’re simply not ready,” Wright said in an interview with CNBC, adding that “all of our military assets right are focused on destroying” Iran’s military assets and its ability to manufacture them in the future.
Oh so we're like, *fucked* fucked.
[+12] u/KomradeKruschenko: Spy goes from 670 to 670.50
Bulls: LOOK AT THE V CALLS BUY
[+12] u/Ok_Environment_3618: 🌮 fucked up everyone with his lies
[+12] u/W_Malinowski: 🥭 doesn’t have the cards and I love that
[+12] u/VirgillMastercard: I thought the war was over. Did Iran not hear 🥭?
[+12] u/Bam2458: Just buy the dip, 100 years from now it’ll be higher.
[+12] u/trumpdiego: ##Nuclear War Likely
##SPY +0.3%
[+12] u/PropheticMurmurs: One of the ugliest SPY charts I've ever seen.
No I mean it's actually physically revolting to look at.
[+12] u/BarbellPadawan: Fuk this. I’m going to go play Zelda A Link to the Past
[+12] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: exceeding 2008 level corruption & complacency
[+12] u/weewoowewoooo: What the fuck is this SPY chart lmaoooo. I’m out of this bullshit market
[+12] u/Character_Pirate_152: We killed the new Supreme Leader's father, mother, son, and his wife, and he STILL does not want to make peace with us!?!?!?!?!
[+12] u/WSB-mods-are-: Tired of all these zoomers "positivity" headlines. They don't drink because they want to be healthier! They don't buy houses to avoid CrAzY maintenance costs!
No you cunts it's because an hour at minimum wage used to get 8 beers at a bar and a 2 bedroom house could be purchased for you and your partners combined income.
[+12] u/djklmnop: I'm fighting for my life over $15 here.
[+12] u/_lueless: I need to pee. Thank you for your attention to this bladder.
[+12] u/AegonTheMeh: My good and responsible ETF investments haven’t gained a single cent in the market since like October.
[+12] u/LiveMotivation: 🥭 trying to pump it. Mr. Market like naw, I’m tired, not today
[+12] u/Nice-Difference8641: >bulls celebrating
>look at the chart
-1.24%
[+12] u/Q4shm0ney: millions of traders + thousands of equities + global uncertainty + human emotion = totally flat line across all indexes...right
[+12] u/EnvironmentalSelf438: trump will anounce a allied coalition to escort ships thru the strait after hours, mark my words
[+12] u/Concerned_Fanboy: # Trump admin estimates US war on Iran cost $11.3bn in first 6 days. Trump officials project $50bn more may be needed
[+12] u/orsomeshitidk: If you don’t use a bidet I don’t want to hear it bruh. Not gonna be lectured by some dude with a dirty ass.
[+12] u/Comfortable733: VANCE HAS THE CHARISMA OF A MATTRESS. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.
[+12] u/Character_Pirate_152: It almost looks like Mr. Orange didn't think very carefully about what he was doing. It is like he made an impulsive decision to blow up a country. That isn't possible is it?
[+12] u/edthechimp: https://preview.redd.it/s7d9d39kcmog1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=da3ba4b061241adc9a3871acdf630f90d7392df6
[+12] u/TowelOld743: Don't worry guys, Hegseth benches 315, he'll keep America safe
[+12] u/loveiseverything: Iran not surrendering, AI-bubble bursting, Blackrock collapsing, Inflation hitting, Housing market crashing. Yeah, this is gonna top last april.
[+12] u/HonestScar7176: There’s no dental plan for like Medicare when you get older????? Man after taking care of my mom recently I’m learning how we don’t take care of our elderly at all
[+12] u/AlexK244: HERE WE GO LAST TWO HOURS PUMP
[+12] u/McClintockC: The tankers yearn for the mines
[+12] u/sonofalando: Bessent shitting his pants.
[+12] u/RemarkableVictory990: IRGC OFFICIAL SAYS IF OUR ENERGY INFRASTRUCTURES ARE ATTACKED , WE WILL "BURN" THE REGIONS OIL AND GAS INFRASTRUCTURE - STATE MEDIA
Still room for escalation wow[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2032172991073698283)
[+12] u/Razvanell95: a trans army unit would have scared the shit out of Iran, but they had to kick them all out...
[+12] u/SuspiciousStable9649: Moment of serious reflection. How much worse can this really get? I’m getting screen-cap vibes.
1. I’ve never ever been right about accountability.
2. There’s only so much damage even a pedo Russian agent can do.
Debating my exit plan.
[+11] u/hv876: Tankers in Strait of Hormuz 🤝 my port
Both ablaze
[+11] u/LasyKuuga: Being an advisor is 70% pretending you know what you on about and 30% asking Claude to explain it like I’m 5
[+11] u/longlivecabu: I just got sent here from r/investing
They told me I’ll get the best advice here
[+11] u/Lower-Condition-4104: Bought out the local supply of chrome spray paint to sell and generate lunch money. About to be a lot of people wanting to be witnessed
[+11] u/Icommandyou: Going to make my own stock exchange at home because this one is rigged
[+11] u/Liability049-6319: The DOW is over 46,000
[+11] u/svpa3991: Iran can nuke the US and spy will still finish flat at this point
[+11] u/bigmeatbag: This administration is wild, the new NASA dude talking about how they are going back to moon and going to build a moon base and stay there while spending is nuts and the economy on the verge of collapse.
[+11] u/Valkorion335786: Iran telling 🥭 he doesn’t hold the cards
Zelensky seen laughing
[+11] u/orsomeshitidk: SPY waddling around like a fat person taking up the isle at Walmart. MOVE mf
Edit: forgot the a in aisle. Thx
[+11] u/boztron: All you 🥭 lovers…. 🫵😂
[+11] u/2lowkey: President panicking for rate cuts is all I need to see
[+11] u/Colloquial: Bols waiting for the V like it went to go get milk
[+11] u/MaxEhrlich: It’s weird cause you don’t really hear good news but then the market rallies a bit. Then we get some bs numbers about consumer pricing and we just kinda shrug and go up some more. Minefield now being set up in the waters and we do some more shrugging. The market doesn’t follow any rules or reason, rational thinking is useless, just go with the flow and hope it doesn’t go tits up is all.
[+11] u/awetfartruinedmylife: "it's almost done, nothing left to hit in Iran, also forget about those stupid files"
[+11] u/ZealousidealSector19: My wife drives a v8 suv and has a 150 mile round trip commute to work. How cooked am I for fuel prices?
[+11] u/Soffatjockis: I bet the strait of Homoz was built by gay bears
[+11] u/2020isgreat: CHINESE GOVERNMENT TELLS STATE REFINERS STOCKPILES UNDER 'STRATEGIC PETROLEUM RESERVE' ARE OFF-LIMITS FOR RELEASE FOR NOW, SOURCES SAY
LOL[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2032056431642624255)
[+11] u/ConsiderationKey1658: nobody seems to be talking about how this war is depleting our strategic Tuah Coin reserve and frankly it’s quite concerning
[+11] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: is everyone ready to have some *fun* 🤤
[+11] u/jonneh: # Iran says it's ready for a long war that would 'destroy' global economy
#
> *It appears that assassinating the Ayatollah was a Pearl Harbour or 9/11 level event for the IRGC.*
[+11] u/enc-nyc: [https://x.com/i/status/2031895801064985021](https://x.com/i/status/2031895801064985021) \- this administration, man
[+11] u/Difficult-Most-1924: You would think the Strait of Hormuz was in Egypt because the Bullz here are in De Nile.
[+11] u/xxxMarilee: In case nobody has put this up yet.
[](https://trumpstruth.org/statuses/37261#)
[Donald J. Trump](https://trumpstruth.org/statuses/37261#)
[u/realDonaldTrump](https://trumpstruth.org/statuses/37261#) · [March 12, 2026, 9:14 AM](https://trumpstruth.org/statuses/37261)
[ Original Post](https://truthsocial.com/@realDonaldTrump/116216383667242591)
The United States is the largest Oil Producer in the World, by far, so when oil prices go up, we make a lot of money. BUT, of far greater interest and importance to me, as President, is stoping an evil Empire, Iran, from having Nuclear Weapons, and destroying the Middle East and, indeed, the World. I won’t ever let that happen! Thank you for your attention to this matter. President DONALD J. TRUMP
[+11] u/bodymindtrader: #BREAKING: THE CAPITALIST SYSTEM
[+11] u/Icy-Motor-8519: Same shit as yesterday. Flat af. Ghey
[+11] u/2020isgreat: COMMANDER OF IRAN'S IRGC NAVY ON X: IN RESPONSE TO THE SUPREME LEADER 'WE WILL DELIVER THE MOST SEVERE BLOWS TO THE AGGRESSOR ENEMY BY MAINTAINING THE STRATEGY OF KEEPING THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ CLOSED'[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2032097997224386691)
[+11] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: Algos are the real Iran
[+11] u/FindingZen4: Imagine starting a war and not having a plan to keep the Strait open
[+11] u/HunterSwifty05: “hOw cOuLd yOu bEt aGaiNsT tHe uNiTeD sTatEs”
[+11] u/snspro: CONGRATS TO MURICANS ON ELECTING 🥭
[+11] u/borkdpasito: Oil immediately puts spy in its place
Iran putting 🥭 in his place
[+11] u/moorhound: 🥭: "Iran somehow got tomahawk missiles and they're shooting them at Gavin Newsom oh nooooo"
[+11] u/2keyed: My pro Trump buddies are saying Iran is getting pummeled and everything is fine lmao
[+11] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: JPow is probably glad he steps down in May and don't have to deal with this retarded shit show lmao
[+11] u/Uisce-beatha: This is going to sound absolutely crazy but imagine if we had more nuclear reactors, solar farms, wind farms, a smart grid, high speed rail, high speed internet access everywhere, an upgraded infrastructure, charging stations everywhere and fleets of electric cars. None of this shit happening right now would even matter.
But no, we get two endless wars, money to Wallstreet for fucking up, endless streams of money into politics and whatever the fuck this is. Good job everyone, now scrub that coal until it's clean before bringing it out of the mine.
[+11] u/portfoliorating: # wAr WiTh iRaN iS oVeR sOOn, wE wOn
# Oil @ 100, SPY down ~3% YTD and the same as 6 months ago.
# Layoffs up 🤲, job number revised down 📉
# so much winning, ARE YOU TIRED OF WINNING?????
# THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
[+11] u/PLEASE_PUNCH_MY_FACE: For those panickins that say the market is doing bad. Try zooming out to one month.
Then you'll see it's really bad.
[+11] u/pmotiveforce: Bulls when market goes up on pure fraud and retardation: 🥭best ever, fuck yeah!
Bulls when market shits: Why did the bers do this to us?!
[+11] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: Judge almost said retard
[+11] u/bearhunter429: #No one is buying shit today. Everyone and their uncle is selling. LMAO🤌
[+11] u/TrumpLovesThemKids: i have such a tiny cock
[+11] u/EnginrA: Don’t you dare V SPY, you finish deep red today like you’re s’posed to
[+11] u/Emilio___Molestevez: most expensive Navy on Earth can't secure a fucking 30 mile pond? embarrassing
[+11] u/ihopethisworksfornow: The cheeks of Hormuz have been clapped
[+11] u/The_Albertino: Intraday movement has only been about burning premium for months. Gotta coin flip overnight to have a chance
[+11] u/Eddyrancid: Booo, I suck! Don't quit my day job!
[+11] u/Tall_Helicopter_833: Some Americans think giving money towards Israeli citizens free healthcare but not Americans healthcare is a good thing wow. Don’t ever change America!
[+11] u/bearhunter429: #We drill until Christmas, then santa rally LMAO🤌
[+11] u/T0th3M00NW3G0: just dump already my goodness. All of this back and forth is just wasting time and delaying the inevitable
[+11] u/MorningAlternative43: I’m beginning to think calls might not have been the move today. Time will tell.
[+11] u/bearhunter429: #Only 9 months left in 2026 bear market. Then we'll start 2027 bear market. LMAO🤌
[+11] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: Dum bols were promised a pump 3000 years ago
[+11] u/_ThisDickAintFree_: Bulls voted for 🥭 that’s our fucking problem.
[+11] u/Ok_Complaint_3589: Bols u kept saying taco everytime taco taco taco taco 🌮🌮🌮 why no taco now then. Why 🤔🤔🤔 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
[+11] u/Specialist_Fig9458: The truly insane thing is that just about every negative catalyst that has actually occurred so far and caused a dip has been a total own goal by 🥭 LMAO
[+11] u/PretendAgency2702: Everyone panic. Mango has fucked the US with his stupidity
[+11] u/aquaticsardonic: I'm an average working-class poor but for a brief moment yesterday I actually thought "if I just full port some of these I could shave profits and keep myself alive"
Is this a gambling addiction?
[+11] u/Salty-Bid1597: Remember that time Ukraine resisted a superpower invasion for 5 years using cheap chinese tech and sheer bloody-mindedness?
I wonder if this time will be like that time.
[+11] u/AirportMaterial5917: wtf is happening at 8 am every morning
[+11] u/IntentionDeep651: Just rename it Strait of America donald
[+11] u/Snoo_9489: Guys im starting to think the government actually doesnt care about us
[+11] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: Desperate 10am fake pump ✅️
[+11] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Nah. I'm not doing this today. Going back to sleep. Fuck it.
[+11] u/puffinnbluffin: Lmfao this market is absolutely nuts
[+11] u/Fine_Specialists: Spy 700 was just a dream
[+11] u/NotEasyOne_Regard: #Just fill the barrels half with oil and half with water. They will not notice.
[+11] u/stupidber: Downloading Arc Raiders instead of doing my taxes.
[+11] u/CulturalConclusion76: # EVERY SINGLE GREEN CANDLE OBLITERATED
[+11] u/2020isgreat: Why don't we just transfer oil through the block chain
[+11] u/scm66: Nice cargo ship you got there. Be a shame if someone were to shit on it.
[+11] u/WSB-mods-are-: Me drilling straight down through my apartment until I hit oil 💰💰💰💰💰
[+11] u/pinkerton_gov: Imagine thinking you can end a war with a tweet.
[+11] u/whydouhatemecablegod: i hate oranges now, how will i get my vitamin C
[+11] u/SoloOutdoor: Up next $40 Chipotle slop bowls, 95% rice
[+11] u/necarpenter417: Who decided it was a good idea to make an app where I lose thousands of dollars just fucking around on my phone? Surely this has to be illegal.
[+11] u/seimow: This has to take the cake for one of the saddest trading days of 2026
[+11] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Oil going up 10% in a day is bullish guys
[+11] u/Icy_Calligrapher7080: Where is ~~Padme~~ the DOW, is it safe? Is it still at $50,000?
[+11] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Colin Powell wouldn't have let this shit happen.
He'd be dangling a shinny green rock in front of the UN by last week
[+11] u/PositiveEdge4361: Did I mention more tariffs are coming?
[+11] u/FxSpecter: OMG. FUCK THIS BS. FUCK YOU ALL.
I’LL SEE Y’ALL TOMORROW SAME TIME?
[+10] u/newtoeso: Waiting for Orange statements today about the not war and how much are they winning.
[+10] u/ModernR3volution: $ZENA files patent for drone interceptor system. Things are lining up.
[+10] u/_maverick98: its ironic that stupidity will cause the shift from oil to electricity and may be good for the enviornment.
[+10] u/dsubpo: Inflation is transitory 🙂 AI investment is real 😊 Oil will come back down 😬 Job losses don't mean anything 😆 SPY 700 🤡
[+10] u/ajibtunes: JUST IN: 🇮🇷 BlackRock says Iran conflict oil supply shock likely to last weeks
[+10] u/yyn1999: LMAO BOLLS REALLY THOUGHT WE MOON WHILE OIL IS UP 8%
[+10] u/PeaDifficult2909: Fuck all of this, by the way. Attacking Iran was a dumb as fuck thing to do. 🥭 stans are the dumbest people alive
[+10] u/motorcycle-emptiness: Bers won today with their funky little balls
[+10] u/Retaining-Wall: Kash Patel enlists UFC fighters to train the FBI.
It's just... Oh my god.
🤦🫠😢😭
[+10] u/2020isgreat: I don't think you guys are noticing that the bullshit lies are starting to work less and less
[+10] u/ziggs_ulted_japan: I really think Trump just sits here and looks at the market all day and then tries to pump it on red days.
[+10] u/cashflow_: I FOR ONE WELCOME OUR NEW IRANIAN OVERLOADS. DO THEY HAVE HEALTHCARE IN IRAN?
[+10] u/revanoctis: Don't fuck with 0dtes today. Get those 1dtes
[+10] u/leeuwvanvlaanderen: Jim Cramer calling for war crimes was not on my 2026 bingo card
[+10] u/Wonderful-Tomato-829: 🥭 is becoming less and less stable since his grandaughter turned 18. Do we have any more underage ivanka clones in reserve?
[+10] u/Fine-Will: Previous support becoming resistance. Very concerning for bools
[+10] u/portfoliorating: # “2025 IS SETTING THE TABLE. THE FEAST WILL BE IN 2026.”
I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT SCAMMED, my deposit goes poof! poof!
[+10] u/Ok-Piano8789: what does jerome even say on wednesday? "idk guys hes retarded what can we do"
[+10] u/mrsweettreats: 🥭 needs to release an AI video of him parting the strait like moses
[+10] u/GabbarInvestor: SPY closing at 666 and tomorrow is Friday the 13th okay we DUMP
[+10] u/Val44x: Every tanker that gets destroyed brings us 10 pts closer to spy 700!
[+10] u/GuyFaulks77: When’s the last time pre market or after hours wasn’t the daily low? This shit is set to melt up mode every day during open hours
[+10] u/Who_is_Your_Zaddy: The calm before the GUH
[+10] u/advantage_player: This is going to be the most telegraphed dump of all time when it finally happens
[+10] u/spurkulator: So my 684C exp 3/16 is cooked right? The one time I follow the bols
[+10] u/SoloOutdoor: I love putting $23k into a 401k, watching it grow nothing and being locked up for a long time. Nice con don.
[+10] u/emr1028: The war with Iran will either end in two weeks or 8 years.
[+10] u/vandammes: IM A BULL BUT OH BOY ITS GONNA CRASH TODAY. LMFAO
[+10] u/HonestScar7176: TRUMP: MORE IMPORTANT TO ME IRAN IS STOPPED THAN HIGH OIL PRICE
[+10] u/redpillsbluepills: Karp and Trump are so GAY
[+10] u/d33p7r0ubl3: What's with all these talking heads wanting to turn countries into parking lots
[+10] u/orsomeshitidk: A lot of people say our timeline split because of Harambe but I think it was Steve Irwin’s death that caused all this.
[+10] u/probablyuntrue: Born too late to intervene in the Middle East
Born too early to intervene in the Middle East
Born just in time to intervene in the Middle East
[+10] u/Col_Treize69: Iran: We have closed Hormuz
The global economy: welp we're fucked
Bulls who desperately wanna pump: um, guyz, the vice secretary of education just said oil is a three letter word, this will all blow over
[+10] u/Independent-Tree-985: Are they stupid? Just dig a canal through the UAE
[+10] u/slightly_visibleRibs: The fake pump before the fake dump going into the fake V into a false breakout moving 65% intraday to end up ±0,02% EOD
[+10] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: This market was already bad, now it’s just the worst
[+10] u/Icy_Extension_6857: “They really blew this one, not just the school but the way they handled it”
Fuck, lmao 🤌
[+10] u/ARSC_RexH: My dearest Clara,
This war has forced me to do something unthinkable, learn to properly set a stop loss so that I am not forced to take you on a date to the Wendy's dumpster with your newest boyfriend. War is hell.
[+10] u/randalflagg: If crude cracks $100 while the market is open oh boy
[+10] u/Sick0h: The Strait of Fuck Me Up Fam is wide open
[+10] u/Active_Drawing_3362: The new Ayatollah is alive
I'm getting laid this evening
Both the statements above have the same degree of truth
[+10] u/KomradeKruschenko: Spy falling harder than bombs in Iran
Bulls: perfect time for calls
[+10] u/iTouchStuff: bondi rly top ticked DOW 50k lmaooooo
[+10] u/PlaysWthSquirrels: Another deteriorating economy and another war in the middle east.......how many 'fell for it again' awards do R voters plan on winning?
[+10] u/TacticalTackleBox: To all the retards learning to trade in mangos market, I salute you.
[+10] u/ryu311: im starting to think this whole iran thing was not well thought out...
[+10] u/Piano_Professional: Can we fucking crash already
[+10] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: A dump, but just enough of dip buying to make sure theta gnaws away at my QQQ puts. Thanks, market, for once again reminding me not to try to time shit
[+10] u/ProudPeak3570: dont worry bols mango will say "iran wants to talk" in a few hours
[+10] u/Infinite-Meet: if you think the low is in, think twice
[+10] u/UsernameTaken_123: IRAN DEPUTY FM SAYS NOT LAYING MINES IN HORMUZ STRAIT... ANYMORE BECAUSE WE ALREADY FINISHED LAYING ALL THE MINES NEEDED - AFP
[+10] u/DeltaVx_: now this is cortisolmaxxing
[+10] u/brannock_: literally this is the MMs winning. No more trending price action, just wiggling it back and forth for the next 4 hours. Congratulations everyone.
[+10] u/ConstantEfficiency83: The energy crisis is so bad that people are ignoring the private credit crisis…. Deutsche Bank said they’re poised to lose 30 billion if the market doesn’t turn around…..
[+10] u/No_Pirate_1409: Cramer is posting through it lmao….just straight up tweeting that the US government should do war crimes lmao
[+10] u/pinkerton_gov: Amazing how many Trump voters say they haven’t been paying attention to the news lately.
Too busy burying their heads in the sand apparently.
[+10] u/ShroomGrown: Oil to $200. Mortgage rates going up...
Wait until you guys see what's going tonhappen to fertilizer prices.
[+10] u/SoloOutdoor: Invest in paying off your cars, guaranteed return
[+10] u/hermeskino715: 🥭: We destroyed their navy
🇮🇷: Many ships can still pass if they cooperate with our navy
[+10] u/DefiantDelta: Karp: "This technology disrupts humanity's train, largely Democratic voters, and makes their economic power less, and increases the economic power of vocationally trained, working class, often male voters. These disruptions are going to disrupt every aspect of our society."
no wonder loser incels with no soul and nothing to offer are all in on PLTR jfc
[+10] u/fknbtch: they're gonna do this until your 0dtes expire, fyi
[+10] u/AvocadoPurees: Kids are so cocky these days, so disrespectful, back in my day having the most chromosomes in a group used to mean something
[+10] u/SwiftSG1: Where’s doge when hegseth bought millions of crabs?
[+10] u/Metacog_Drivel: The American people are rich with poverty
[+10] u/svpa3991: Older generations start wars and still blame younger generation for avocado toast and coffee
[+10] u/Toothlesskinch: Good afternoon. This week, I am an expert in oil production, logistics and geo-political risk assessment. AMA
[+10] u/portfoliorating: # THIS IS A BIG SCAM. THE MONEY I DEPOSITED IS GONE NOW.
[+10] u/jonneh: Cathie Wood and Tom Lee on CNBC together
#
Now I’m starting to get worried 😭😭
[+10] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: RIP Joe Rogan (he just hit a mine in the strait of Hormuz)
[+10] u/RemarkableVictory990: Trump: Fed's Powell shouldn't wait for the next Fed meeting to drop rates. - Truth Social
He should wait for next decade[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2032171636636455176)
[+10] u/HonestScar7176: Mango sounds fucking pathetic here.
[+10] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: We haven't even SEEN index corrections yet. 🐒
[+10] u/Urzuck: Bols screaming pump, wtf are they looking at lmao
[+10] u/BagHoldersOfAmerica: Iran currency and economy was tanked prior to all this, they have nothing to lose bringing the world down with them
[+10] u/RemarkableVictory990: If they keep using this escorting ships line I'll start to think they have nothing else in the tank
[+10] u/BrokenStonks: Savings acct probably outperforms half of us here
[+10] u/PompeiiSketches: BOOLS getting swirlied 😰🚽
[+10] u/_rockthemike: Thankfully I didn’t trade today
[+10] u/Metacog_Drivel: Mango bankrupting another casino.
[+10] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: just a lil espresso and an upper deckie Zyn to get the traffic in colon moving 💩
[+10] u/Icy-Motor-8519: If today is as flat and gay as yesterday I’m marching into the strait of hummus and protesting up and down the strait in my pedalling swan boat
[+10] u/The_BakedCrusader: So much for DOGE and cutting down on government waste when you start a war that burns a billion a day
[+10] u/ajibtunes: JUST IN: 213,000 people filed for unemployment this past week
[+10] u/FuckleUp: New Ayatollah press release at market open… diabolical
[+10] u/Snoo23417: I can't believe Biden would do this...
[+10] u/W_Malinowski: Absolutely can’t wait for that official recession announcement
[+10] u/Bittertwitter: Im crashing out right now. Petrol prices is already up. Utilities company just sent a notice electricity prices will go up next month onwards.
[+10] u/Starkfault: Stocks will never go up again
[+10] u/tika_dengu: Oil cancelling out losses in my port, shame about gold
[+10] u/TheMightySet69: Damn, we went from "we're back" to "it's over' in the blink of an eye
[+10] u/J_da_CPA: Since when have you seen fbi agents doing hand to hand combat. Funniest thing I’ve seen all week
[+10] u/qx2: Thank you, I love paying $6 per gallon sir. May I kiss the ring now?
[+10] u/Competitive-Water944: They used to laugh at Ber. Now they bow to Ber
[+10] u/sloanemonroe: Think about it. The head of the military is a Fox News tv host. The pres is a tv show host. These are not the right people for a HUGE military problem. I’m shocked the smart people aren’t selling harder.
[+10] u/ihopethisworksfornow: We haven’t bottomed til I see a dozen posts of large open positions calling for SPY 550
[+10] u/Pristine_Afternoon96: The Iran War is officially **FINISHED**, and let me tell you, it was a total **VICTORY** like nobody has ever seen before! I looked at the maps, I looked at the sand—so much sand, believe me—and I said, "Why are we still there?" The Generals, they’re great people, but they love spending your **TRILLIONS** of dollars. I told them, "No more!" We’ve already won so much that Iran is practically **BEGGING** for us to leave just so they can feel important again. It’s a very smart, very **BEAUTIFUL** move for our country, and now I’m bringing our great soldiers home where they belong.
The **FAKE NEWS** Media will try to say, "Oh, he’s backing out," but they don't understand the **ART OF THE DEAL**. I’m not backing out, I’m "concluding" because there’s nothing left to beat! We’ve humiliated them so badly it’s actually becoming a little bit sad to watch. I have much better things to do, like building the **GREATEST ECONOMY** in the history of the world, and I can’t do that if I’m busy winning a war that I already won weeks ago. A very **HISTORIC** day for America!
[+10] u/Shoddy_Vegetable4268: 2nd interview went better than expected. Hoping for a third
[+10] u/bb483: bol sees energy surging, bol piles into tech call
[+10] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: Its a great time to make and lose money
[+10] u/AvocadoPurees: Market movers :
War ❌️
Oil ❌️
Regards and options ✅️
[+10] u/OkRecommendation1040: Holding a 0dte for more than a minute is illegal in this market
[+10] u/otimanob: Because during ww3 the first thing people will do is find their match on bumble.
[+10] u/EnginrA: Yeah fuckin dump you piece of shit spy
[+10] u/Bliqe: If 🥭 tweeted that Iran personally called him and apologized, gay bulls would believe it
[+10] u/Soffatjockis: No crying in the 5 times bankrupted casino!
[+10] u/RobertFKennedy: Just go -2% already Jesus
[+10] u/31andnotdone: https://preview.redd.it/ogrm05aw4nog1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0035024ea64d1061600326d76709025232ece338
[+10] u/bearhunter429: #Where were you when America died? LMAO🤌
[+10] u/D1finalboss: I’m not wrong, the market is wrong 😡
[+10] u/FlyingLineman: For the past 10 years I only come around here during bear szn
I am here
[+10] u/ValueOfADollar: I am henceforth restrcting myself from buying premarket such that I can lose money within regular trading hours like everyone else
[+10] u/Lund26: GIVE ME SOMETHING FOR THE PAIN AND LET ME DIE
[+10] u/TowelOld743: Yeah, until he put up new tariffs and started a war
[+9] u/collegefootballfan69: Every day my feelings are either greed or fear. Today I am just horny.
[+9] u/miata_only: Once we deploy our dolphins to the Strait we won't have to worry about mines anymore
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Navy_Marine_Mammal_Program
[+9] u/ARSC_RexH: What do you mean the Supreme Leader of the Revolution is going to make a statement on TV? I was told the revolution won't be televised.
[+9] u/BarbellPadawan: >”Iran will take tribute from The Enemy.”
-Supreme Leader Mojtaba Khamenei
Just as I predicted 🤌
[+9] u/UsernameTaken_123: When Khameini talks about "opening other fronts" he 100% means Houties mining the Suez canal
[+9] u/borkdpasito: How does it feel to be the laughing stock of the world 🥭. Anyone who voted for him is regarded
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: We're 3% off ATH and bulls are asking for bleeding to stop lmao
[+9] u/illicit_FROG: Is it true that the US didn't even bother to stock pile oil before this?
[+9] u/crossdefaults: Oil at $100 to $200 a barrel bringing all economic activity to a standstill? Priced in.
[+9] u/aaapod: grab em by the hormussy
[+9] u/MundaneExtension3195: I'm short the Q's ... this economy can not sustain prolonged high oil prices
[+9] u/TraipseTraveller: Getting close to that time when I can re heat some Brussel sprouts and fish in the break room
[+9] u/Gom_KBull: # OH SHIT ANOTHER DIP
# GO AHEAD AND BUY MORE CALLS BOLS LMAO
# ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭
^(KEEN TOCKY)
[+9] u/pmotiveforce: Lol 🥭 spinning this as good for US because we make money on oil.
This shit is so hilarious we literally have a childish moron running shit and bulls have been tripping over themselves to invest in this market.
[+9] u/BarbellPadawan: I sometimes randomly remember that a two years ago, a lot of uninformed and uneducated—but very devoted—voters were buying DJT at 70$, many are still holding, and that makes me a little happier.
[+9] u/Xzlk: The play today is to transfer this back to my checking account
[+9] u/SoloOutdoor: Im done getting bamboozled every day so mango and company can eat lobster and rape kids
[+9] u/bigdaddyrongregs: Beats putting pronouns in your email signature, right fellas??
[+9] u/RaikouVsHaiku: This market gayer than Lindsay Graham
[+9] u/aftherith: Us citizens rumored to be receiving their tariff refunds in the form of jugs of Alaskan crude oil. DiY refinery kits sold separately. -Bloomerberg
[+9] u/fish_: i still can’t get over the fact that we were robbed of the best bull market of all time by an orange retard.
[+9] u/Independent-Tree-985: 6 hours later and the only thing thats changed is the time of day
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: #people bitched about sleepy markets
[+9] u/Me-Regarded: But why did we bomb Iran to begin with?
[+9] u/Pristine_Afternoon96: The War with Iran is **OVER** and the United States has never been **HOTTER**! We are the envy of the entire World! Everyone wants what we have—the most powerful Military and the most **BEAUTIFUL** Energy. I looked at the Oil prices and I said, "This is great!" High Oil is a **TOTAL WIN** for our incredible Energy companies and our Great State of Texas. We are swimming in Black Gold, believe me!
The Stock Market is doing things nobody has ever seen before—the **FAKE NEWS** says a dip is bad, but I say it’s a **BARGAIN**! It’s a "Buying Opportunity" for the smart people, the winners. We’re shaking out the losers and the weak players so the **REAL** Americans can get even richer. We’ve secured the Strait, we’ve secured the Oil, and our Country is the hottest place on Earth right now. A very **POWERFUL**, very smart victory for the United States!
[+9] u/iswearnotagain10: I was promised a V this morning. Chart looks like a dying cancer patient’s heart monitor.
[+9] u/AlGAdams: 🏳️🌈🧸Reporting for duty
[+9] u/ConsiderationKey1658: Today is the day I turn it all around
[+9] u/Thebaxxxx: Ive always had an obsession with pigs 🐖🐷 big soft pink chunks of love. So when i heard about lean hog futes i just couldnt resist lol. 60% of my port relies on you regards getting your healthy dose of bacon.
[+9] u/WrexyWrex: monday is 3/16
stone cold stunner incoming
[+9] u/sloanemonroe: How do you stop 20 foot fishing boats that are stored in garages in 500 locations or more from going out and shooting grenades at oil tankers?
[+9] u/Apple2o: Going back and looking at a watchlist I made 10 years ago be like
fuuuck my life
[+9] u/tbiol: lost all my cash gang
[+9] u/Subymoa: Because of all the negativity, some tweet will make the day green.
[+9] u/No_Fig_7835: "Why don’t they just tokenize the oil in the Middle East and transport it across permissionless financial rails, thereby avoiding the Strait of Hormuz altogether" - some twitter user nails it.
[+9] u/Educational-Cat-2553: US Energy chief: Oil unlikely to hit 200$
bul fuk
[+9] u/Icy_Jelly_315: Guys this is all fuk. It's going to be 2020 all over again. A true freak out and sell everything moment and you gonna be like in march 2020 saying How can we have been so blind
Seriously
[+9] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: Jim cunt Cramer again with the warmongering zio talk saying we need to destroy Iran and wipe out all their infrastructures that means children with no electricity hospital destroyed .. he needs to shut the fuck up
[+9] u/_lueless: How many of you guys think Taco is actually making the decisions?
[+9] u/jasperCrow: SPY is the same price it was October 3. I guess stonks don’t only go up.
[+9] u/CoC_Axis_of_Evil: Palantir CEO: all wars are bad except for this Iran one because it’s making me rich.
You guys got duped thinking this was a meme stock.
[+9] u/ripcord51: this karp bro sounds like he's pure evil
[+9] u/saccotac: Circuit Breaker Levels: Thursday 03/12/2026
Level 1: 6301.49
Level 2: 5894.94
Level 3: 5420.64
[+9] u/livingunique: Remember, you're only an embarrassment to your family and friends, that cam girl thinks you're great
[+9] u/Horror_Yam_9078: SPY massively under-reacting tbh.
[+9] u/louis-debroglie: The problem for longs here is that the US administration has run out of options on all deescalation fronts. The Iranians have the initiative, which means, heading into the weekend, being long amounts to betting on Iran to blunder strategically by prematurely striking a deal.
The dudes running Iran may be fascist theocratic assholes but they have shown clearly by now they are not idiots, and in fact much more strategic and intelligent than the current band of morons running the US.
[+9] u/borkdpasito: HAHAHAH FUNDIES TRYING TO DELAY OIL CRUSHING SPY
[+9] u/Tay_Tay86: Bulls about to win a gold medal in Olympic mental gymnastics trying to convince people that 95$ oil is NBD
[+9] u/penelope5674: Fuck 🥭omg 🥭is Israel’s bitch. I thought he was supposed to show me why Americans don’t have healthcare, now I feel like Americans actually should probably just have healthcare, it’s not even worth it
[+9] u/sloanemonroe: 100% Donnie is telling the generals to just send the aircraft carriers to the strait and they are telling him they will be blown up. And he is saying, “sure there will be deaths but that’s what they are there for “
[+9] u/2020isgreat: WRIGHT: TRUMP IS CONCERNED ABOUT RISING ENERGY PRICES DURING THIS SHORT-TERM PERIOD -FOX NEWS INTERVIEW
I THOUGHT U DON'T CARE[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2032096457369796690)
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Jerome Powell is gonna beat us with a belt next week at FOMC 🥺
[+9] u/cannythecat: You guys realize that Iran very well knows that🥭is desperately trying to TACO.
[+9] u/KomradeKruschenko: Why doesnt the US build a wall on Iran so they cant bomb the strait??? Are they stupid????
[+9] u/Better-Call-SauI: PDF-in-chief really thought the theocratic regime would fall just because 86yo grandpa is killed. That's like killing the Pope and expecting the catholic church to stop existing.
[+9] u/SquirtleStomp: Be China
Do nothing
Win
[+9] u/Bichael-Murry: very unconstitutional dump, we won bigly
[+9] u/Low_Programmer1814: How do you trade this fucking market??
[+9] u/dangerusZone: Bulls, sitting in **warm water for 10–15 minutes** can relax the anal muscles and reduce soreness!
[+9] u/trickponies: These guys let an AI blow up a school and you think they have a PLAN? Spy to 300.
[+9] u/Candid_Consequence94: MSFT sued Trump administration
[+9] u/ComfortableWolf779: 🥭will start a civil war to distract from the epstein files
[+9] u/noahmfs: One twitt and we back to green that stupid is the market nowadays
[+9] u/HandsomeTod11: Train the lobsters Pete bought to snip the mines along the strait. This is geopolitical advice
[+9] u/PapiGoneGamer: Suspending the Jones Act only means the Trump administration is out of tools to control the price of oil unless they start granting leases to citizens to drill their own wells in their backyards.
[+9] u/BaxterrStockman: ShOrT tErM pAiN fOr LoNg tErM gAiN 🤡
[+9] u/not-irresponsible: we’ll win so much, you’ll even get tired of winning 💪
[+9] u/31andnotdone: *sir your comments didnt lift the market*
[+9] u/Unique_Zucchini1041: Getting absolutely fucked
[+9] u/Metal-Water: A lot of Asian milfs at my job
[+9] u/brannock_: This is hilarious how obviously fake this is. Every single candle closes at its high. Not even bothering to try to disguise the price action
[+9] u/Alive_Industry1101: Why would I sell my calls now… I prefer to hold, anxiously watch all afternoon before closing for less
[+9] u/ARSC_RexH: Someone should take all these shitty choppy saw waves and see what kinda music it makes.
Has to be more enjoyable than this shit ass market.
[+9] u/potato111a: Miscalculation?? Bold to assume 🥭 calculated before the move LMAO 🤌
[+9] u/Possible-Material693: “We did not start this war. It started 47 years ago” lmao holy gaslight
[+9] u/TraipseTraveller: So much for taking the girlfriend out to a nice expensive restaurant. I was looking forward to Five Guys too
[+9] u/MuricanWisecrack: i kind of feel like very doomed when i look at the future.
A) i studied CS, i worked as Freelancer for the last 7 years - they do not hire so much anymore and the easy money gets eaten away as the Toollayer does
B) the Markets are fucked thanks to Mango
C) who the fuck is making any money anywhere? How? with what business?
we enter full AI-Driven Tech-feudalism. Fuck all your startups - they will be merely trainingdata for Big-Money Tech Conglomerates. Worst part about it? They do also not make any money with it but have huge burn.
You were the best in doing some Javascript UI, learned that hard for the last 10 years, grinding 50 hour weeks? Fuck you, hoho, Claude/Codex/Gemini does 10x your work now hohoho
And Donny decides to enter WW3 and send us into a fuckin energyshock and everything is going up in flames
[+9] u/AppointmentOverall16: Yo it worked, i just bought a couple of cheap spy calls and it immediately went down, Jokes on them i have more puts.
[+9] u/gratatatatatatat: Trump looks older now than he did in 2016 🤔💭
Theres a conspiracy there...somewhere...
[+9] u/NaluknengBalong_0918: Ghey bears! Lather up the oil! We dance!💃💃💃🤣
[+9] u/ihopethisworksfornow: SPY 666 PUTS PRINTING
#HAIL SATAN
👹
🤘🎸🤘
[+9] u/OrdinaryMix4013: just woke up how many tankers on fire did i miss overnight
[+9] u/solidsneeze: I can smell the tacos being made... the ground beef is browning
[+9] u/bigbootytrudyyy: What’s the point of life if you don’t have a significant other and/or kids
[+9] u/BarbellPadawan: I make a lot of stupid comments on here. *Even I* don’t have anything blocked. Highly sus if you have to block your own comment history.
[+9] u/TruthFantastic1741: WHO TF IS BRENT CRUDE???!!!
[+9] u/ChampagnePapi-: Need trump to post something retarded asap
[+9] u/Ok_Environment_3618: Sold my calls for a 30% loss. Flipped to puts now. I won't exit unless a 100% profit.
[+9] u/ten7four: #LMAO BERS 🤣🤣
Oh wait it's going back down
#LMAO BOLS 🤣🤣
[+9] u/2muchnet42day: THEY'RE EATING THE BULLS
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: Imagine telling bols at the end of Oct 2025 that they’d be begging for $675 in March lmao
[+9] u/neutralpoliticsbot: I never liked this money anyway
joke is on you Mr Market
[+9] u/HomeMadeToast: Remember when we all made money buying SLV calls? Those were the days 😔
[+9] u/keagator: Shhhh. My favorite show is on. 📈📉📈📉📈📉📈📉📈
[+9] u/Revolver_Lanky_Kong: Do you guys think Pam Bondi feels like a idiot for trying to defend 🥭 with "the DOW is over 50,000" after he blew that shit up a literal day later by fucking with Iran?
[+9] u/_bigmeatyklaws: Can Don just lie and pump us again
[+9] u/WrexyWrex: “The first panacea for a mismanaged nation is inflation of the currency; the second is war. Both bring a temporary prosperity; both bring a permanent ruin. But both are the refuge of political and economic opportunists.” -Ernest Hemingway
[+9] u/Pristine_Afternoon96: is this the big ego war? Iran will never surrender and Trump will never admit failure. This shit may go on forever
[+9] u/Fine-Will: Don't worry, SPY is drilling for oil to alleviate the shortage as we speak
[+9] u/PompeiiSketches: It would be very funny if the market drilled after hours again
[+9] u/Devastaytah: Most limp dicked pump ive seen
[+9] u/horseisahorse: >Where is the Federal Reserve Chairman, Jerome “Too Late” Powell, today? He should be dropping Interest Rates, IMMEDIATELY, not waiting for the next meeting! President DONALD J. TRUMP
[+9] u/BalanceWide4735: why Biden still do it to us
[+9] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: # PIN THE FUCKIN HOTLINE BEFORE CLOSING
[+9] u/solidsneeze: if Iran cyber attacking, would be just horrible if they released all the Epstein files 🤞
[+9] u/092Casey: I really think 🌮 officially went off the deep end. "Im just going to take a little detour" he said twice like Neil McCauley in Heat to get Waingro.😂 He really believes he's steering a ship and nobody else on the boat matters. Ever since the SC shot down tariffs he went crazy.
[+9] u/OsamaBagHolding: Do Iranians not want us to release the files or something?
[+9] u/Any-Papaya6486: shit is bout to take a dumpppp
[+9] u/svpa3991: Bols fighting the inevitable
[+9] u/PositiveEdge4361: I think it’s time to rotate into less volatile investments like fartcoin
[+9] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: It may be time to send in Kid Rock
[+9] u/neo-futurism: BULLS silent today. Jeez what a bloodbath
[+9] u/Individual_Error_428: My ass hurts very badly
[+9] u/Icy-Motor-8519: COME ON, SAY WE CEASEFIRE, WHORE OF MOOSE IS OPEN LIKE MY MOMMA’S LEGS AND WE ALL BEAT OUR MEAT TO GREEN GAINS. LEEEROY JENKIIIINS!
[+9] u/cow_grass: These 0dte prices are criminal. Index needs to move half a percent just for me to break even
[+9] u/pink_ego_box: Mango:
STOPPING IRAN IS GREATER INTEREST TO ME THAN OIL PRICES
MORE IMPORTANT TO ME IRAN IS STOPPED THAN HIGH OIL PRICE
WHEN OIL PRICES GO UP, WE MAKE A LOT OF MONEY
US MAKES A LOT OF MONEY WHEN OIL PRICES GO UP.
Lmfao
[+9] u/BaxterrStockman: Watching my portfolio eat shit daily. Thanks 🥭
[+9] u/AMX_revue: What does 🥭🌽 mean???
[+9] u/Force_Hammer: This market hates both bears and bulls! 😂😭
[+9] u/31andnotdone: you can skip this ad in 3 seconds ⏭️
[+9] u/CimLeah: Shit is gonna drop $5 overnight then open at $670 tomorrow. Same old shit to fuck us all.
[+9] u/RagingBearBull: My stragegy is mainly hope.
it will be fine.
Last time I had a stragegy it was panic, and masturabate.
the masturbate bit was nice, but the panic bit made me take a bunch of losses.
[+9] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: SPY hit 666.66 and crater through it, Satan's cock have ascended from hell to simultaneously fuck every bol and equities market in existence
[+9] u/ConstantEfficiency83: Didn’t Sach’s say yesterday that they could see a huge rally with lower oil prices? Now today they’re revising down their 2026 forecast due to oil prices? Lmao one of us
[+9] u/WSB-mods-are-: This is more depressing than browsing zillow
[+9] u/Unlikely-Run-400: Can’t even trade in this bs market. Like wtf is the point. Oil going up and yet spy goes up? Spy needs a healthy gap down under 660 to even think about moving forward again.
[+9] u/ButterscotchFew9855: Like, I played Minesweeper, shit ain't that Hard. Calls
[+9] u/A_small_Chicken: Does Hegseth have an enlisted fluffer to blow him in that Pentagon makeup room?
[+9] u/PinealTone: candy makers are phasing out real cocoa in chocolate.
.Due to the volatile cocoa market, companies like Hershey are using replacement ingredients such as sugar, oil, milk and nuts
Oh hell no.. that not even candies to me anymore with zero chocolates.
[+9] u/darth_scion: Imagine going to a casino and walking out even
[+9] u/Comfortable733: if Robinhood could stop reminding me every stock I own is down 10+ percent that’d be great 🤡🥊
[+9] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: false flag happened, suspect rammed truck full of explosives into Detroit synagogue
sweatshirt will say "Property of Shah of Iran"
[+9] u/DegenGonnaDegen: Back in my day, foot longs were $5
[+9] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Puts until 1PM then switching to calls. There's definitely going to be some corrupt bullshit announced and we'll pump on a bunch of lies
[+9] u/patmccock86: CNBC practically begging retail investors to buy the dip, good lord
[+9] u/PocaMadre69: Dude just what the fuck
[+9] u/pmotiveforce: Bulls in the 80's snorted cocaine.
Bulls in the 2020's snort Adderall and Drano. This is why your modern bull is so spastic and retarded as opposed to the 80's bulls who were spastic and smart.
[+9] u/madeenahjyasu: WHATEVER UR ABOUT TO DO DONT DO IT 🗣️
[+9] u/twistnblaze: disgusting price action last few days
[+9] u/callsonreddit: Don't let the Iran war distract you from new tariffs
Trump administration opens Section 301 probes into \~60 countries that could lead to new tariffs after Supreme Court blocks emergency tariff powers
[https://finance.yahoo.com/news/trump-administration-pursues-new-avenues-for-imposing-tariffs-215914369.html](https://finance.yahoo.com/news/trump-administration-pursues-new-avenues-for-imposing-tariffs-215914369.html)
[+9] u/Lil-PussyFart: The world is on fire and the dumbest people on the planet are buying the dip
[+9] u/wildcat1055: wen 🥭 Nobel peace prize?
[+9] u/Comfortable733: fries in the bag please
[+9] u/cbusoh66: Walter Bloomberg: Tariffs on Iran will be raised to 1000% unless they open the Strait
[+9] u/malimisko: I am tired of winning Trump
[+9] u/UsernameTaken_123: It's absurd how easy it is to close a water passage, Iran just dropped a few dozen mines and said "good luck lol" and like 95% of the traffic stopped
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Arrest Pam bondi for calling the top
[+9] u/Lil-PussyFart: Just want the market to crash so I can verbally berate my elderly family members on how they directly caused it
[+9] u/svpa3991: glue sniffers going to pull up their crayons and tell me this zigzag was all predictable through their TA lmao
[+8] u/Commercial-District1: Imagine Truth social being hacked by Iran.
[+8] u/SquirtleStomp: How is bumble up? I havent gotten laid in weeks???
[+8] u/djln491: advice to bol: start drinking early
[+8] u/TheBlueBlaze: If anything this war really *is* ahead of schedule, in that weapons are already being rerouted to the region due to supply issues, and oil reserves are already having to be tapped globally.
[+8] u/Pury101: I'm starting to think that 🥭 didn't have a plan going into this, just a hunch though...
[+8] u/SergeantThreat: “I know not with what weapons World War IV will be fought, but World War III will be fought with shitposts and memes.”
[+8] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: The important thing here is boomers are getting hit the hardest.
[+8] u/Mahrez-: Fuck you Trump, You POS
[+8] u/Extension-Ad917: You can feel the bulls sitting at their desk popping a zyn getting ready to defend the qqq 600 level
[+8] u/Colloquial: Bols acting like it's American to have a regard in charge to destroy itself
[+8] u/Majestic-Bass6772: SPY with the "🥺🥺 i frew up" candle
[+8] u/Liability049-6319: bol finally realizing that a government run by reality TV stars, nepo babies, pdf files, and former Fox News contributors might not be running the country well
[+8] u/McKoijion: https://www.reuters.com/business/finance/morgan-stanley-restricts-redemptions-private-credit-fund-after-withdrawals-surge-2026-03-11/
[+8] u/Unemployable1593: i can’t even laugh at the bulls anymore. it’s just sad
[+8] u/NlNJANEER: Toyota Middle East announcing the return of the Hilux by popular demand
[+8] u/Metal-Water: They’re eating the calls. They’re eating the puts.
[+8] u/Options_tarded: Wtf was that lmao. These damn ai humanoid boomer trading algos fucking everything up
[+8] u/Any-Background2739: dude how am i supposed to gamble on a market this shit
[+8] u/BagHoldersOfAmerica: I am straight up not having a good time this month
[+8] u/smart_doge: SPY made that Batman thingy
[+8] u/awetfartruinedmylife: RDDT is a great stock for money haters like me
[+8] u/Just_Butterfly4052: I am become fukt, hodler of bags.
[+8] u/highlanderquestion90: What all the wifes-boyfriend Apologist clowns in here don't understand is that in the Strait of Hormuz TWO of the 30 miles are dredged for passage.
And this passage allowed transit for 20% of the global oil supply.
And it is apparently closed until further notice.
[+8] u/TraipseTraveller: Just burnt some popcorn in the break room. Set off the fire alarm and now the fire trucks are on their way
[+8] u/Sufficient-Love9567: Either pump this shit to the moon or let this bitch crash to my ass
[+8] u/Ok_Importance9886: spy going to 652 soon
[+8] u/Thoughtful_Tortoise: Onds Pltr partnership lol
[+8] u/NewDawn101: $2 trillion would really change my life for better
[+8] u/Effective_Dog3089: Today, upvote for red, downvote for green.
[+8] u/Fit_Neighborhood9251: Khamenei waited for the market opening intentionally to make his statement, so he could fuk with Orangoman.
That deserves some respect.
[+8] u/Wowmuchrya: Bol crying in corner begging for a tweet LMAO PATHETIC
[+8] u/Junkingfool: Nothin but a gey bear market.. and I bought calls.
Who's the idiot in this story?
[+8] u/W_Malinowski: “He’s gonna taco”
On what? The bombs that already blew up?
[+8] u/Bichael-Murry: holy shit, he is so fucking trapped in this mess... who knows what's coming next / what's his exit strategy
JUST 🌮 ALREADY FFS
[+8] u/Sandvicheater: So Trump and Netanyahu have until Nov midterm election to resolve this Iran issue before all US troops are recalled by the newly Democratic majority house and senate correct?
So from the Iranian army perspective all they gotta do is "run down the clock" and hope they hold out until US midterm elections?
[+8] u/ClayMost: Phenomenal scalping day
[+8] u/richbeezy: Trump just needs to instruct ALL companies to let workers work remotely until the war ends.
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: # DONT WORRY GUYS
HES LOOKING FOR A WAY TO TACO AS WE SPEAK
[+8] u/Gristle__McThornbody: Donnie is so out of his element he thought he could conquer Iran in one day like he did with Venezueler lmao.
[+8] u/i-Vison: Stop falling for the fake pump… they are selling intovit
[+8] u/RealPrinceZuko: PLTR partnering with ONDS, great news for holders. Don't know if it'll pump much off just that but very strong conviction to keep a long position here
[+8] u/Soberdonkey69: Oil is going up because now the tankers are being blown up. What a mess to the global economy.
[+8] u/machinepeen: it’s going down
I’m yelling timber
You better move
You better dance
[+8] u/jonneh: Yale Budget Lab Exec. Director on the shrinking appeal of U.S. debt 😅
> "*We are currently the boyfriend at the beginning of the Hallmark movie in the big city, where the girlfriend is still going out with him even though she knows that it's wrong.*"
[+8] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: How many things can we price in
[+8] u/pigeon_shit: To all the stay at home dads like myself - check out Alphablocks and Numberblocks for you little one and thank me later.
[+8] u/Erieztoys: Feel like I have been averaging down for years.
[+8] u/FlyingLineman: have they tried hooking up a very long garden hose to move the oil around the straight?
[+8] u/Metal-Water: I lost everything in 1 minute
[+8] u/ripcord51: just call it the strait of america and open it up, i don't see the problem here.
[+8] u/looool_k_libtard: So much crying. Don’t you want to be patriots? $10-$15 gas isn’t a problem if you aren’t a fucking beta. We need to do this war!
[+8] u/Austin_Destroyer: There is an energy crisis. Do you:
a) invest in renewable energy
b) short oil futures
c) commit to boots on the ground in Iran
d) lol @ a, it's b and c
[+8] u/PinNo6572: SPY falling faster than Don’s dockers in a middle school locker room
[+8] u/sekak77: Selling calls to bols, ez money
[+8] u/lostinspacs: Keep printing Jay it’s working
[+8] u/Time_Independence355: if you trading short term options today, you belong here
[+8] u/killerbeeswaxkill: Wife doesn’t know it yet but I’ve been unemployed for 3 months LMAO 🤌
[+8] u/SearchUsual5193: NO CRYING IN THE CASINO.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.
[+8] u/pinkerton_gov: Oil will hit $200 and the market will only be down 1.5%. Make it make sense.
[+8] u/moorhound: *-1.16%*
*Bols still can't stop yapping*
I wish I was dumb enough to be this bold
[+8] u/WSB-mods-are-: You take the SPY puts... the war ends, you wake up worthless and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the SPY calls... you stay in the red, and I show you how deep your portfolio goes.
[+8] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: The dumbest person you know is president and is making billions in office while sending prices higher. The weaponization of ignorance are the real WMDs lmao
[+8] u/Ok-Thought-9960: Now hes back to fucking with our boy Jpow holy shit this dude fucking blows
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: **February 27 2026**
# 🥭: "im gonna go blow the shit out of Iran, I MEAN... they dont even have nukes, wtf are they gonna do about it?LOL"
^(Curb Your Enthusiasm Theme Song Intensifies)
[+8] u/brute-forced: SPY will end the year -16%
[+8] u/WrexyWrex: I just overheard someone say "why isn't Hillary in prison yet"
my head hurts
[+8] u/Madsen13140: Chose a direction for god's sake
[+8] u/darth_scion: My job just gave me a company gas card two weeks ago. I feel like Nicolas Cage in the breeze.
[+8] u/aquaticsardonic: I'll touch you if you touch me
[+8] u/Valkorion335786: - Trade disputes and blockade over a trade route
- Republic being subverted over sex scandals
- “Sand people" killed, royalty indifferent
- Villains with silly names
- Powerful clerical order screwing up
Am I talking about Star Wars or Iran?
[+8] u/spellbreaker: Homa eagled his first hole at The Players and is +8000 to win... I've seen enough full porting.
[+8] u/Spicyytamale: Prices are going up. My portfolio is going down.
Perfectly balanced, as all things should be.
[+8] u/Basis_404_: Oil being up 62% from a month ago is going to be a problem for a lot of people and companies
[+8] u/Weak_Emu3659: Reddit's AI technology has determined the following two subreddits are most similar across all of reddit determined by user posting content:
1. r/wallstreetbets
2. r/SuicideWatch
[+8] u/mandoslambo: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+8] u/qx2: We going to ignore Iran next week when we invade Cuba 🤡🤡
[+8] u/Bichael-Murry: lol kinda cool watching iran playing the same game like the us.
basically start shitposting moments before markets open and then start dumping bombs during AH and futes
fucking lol
[+8] u/tornadopower97: Everyone waiting for the Truth Social post so they can pump on lies.
[+8] u/ToughVegetable2483: I swear there’s just a billionaires computer out there just only buys at exactly 9:59am every morning and he just forgot about it
[+8] u/cbusoh66: Ayatollah Jr: They can't pass through the Strait "because of the implication"
[+8] u/ResidentPack4103: Mms gonna let the market die on my son's sixth birthday?
I don't fuckin think so
Spy 675 eod boys
[+8] u/somecleverphrase: could you imagine if the US used the oil sales like Norway to fund healthcare, pensions, and infrastructure. or better yet to creater cat girl butler/chauffeurs
[+8] u/2020isgreat: TRUMP ADMINISTRATION: SET TO SUSPEND JONES ACT TO TAME OIL PRICE
LMFAO[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2032105931526570162)
[+8] u/Austin_Destroyer: A haiku:
Rusting barrels beached
Green candles flicker and die
Horizon glows red.
[+8] u/TacoAlPastorConQueso: Imagine voting for 🥭
[+8] u/I_work_too_much: Did anyone even ask the strait if it consented to these mines? Iran not being very considerate here.
[+8] u/cannythecat: IRAN SAYS NO CEASEFIRE UNTIL SUPREME LEADER IS FULL PORTED INTO CALLS
[+8] u/Just_Learned_This: Made $55 today, time to jerk off and order burger king.
[+8] u/No_Current3675: I honestly don't know if I have the patience to endure another 10-15 years of bullshit meetings.
[+8] u/Hot-Ambassador8740: The fact that SPY isn’t just in free fall is such a fucking joke
[+8] u/NaluknengBalong_0918: CNBC… oil prices to $130… LFG! 💃💃💃🤣
[+8] u/cryptohorn: Bers eating filet mignon at dorsia
[+8] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Why don’t we take the strait and push it somewhere else!
[+8] u/WickedTwista: Why don't they just use drones to deliver oil one barrel at a time?
Are they stupid?
It's only like 20 million barrels of oil that normally get exported through the strait per day
[+8] u/Abe2025: Bro this wat is getting worse and worse. Iran is tearing up israel
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: *Deutsche Bank Flags a $30 Billion Exposure to Private Credit -* [bloomberg](https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-03-12/deutsche-bank-flags-a-30-billion-exposure-to-private-credit?embedded-checkout=true)
*Morgan Stanley Limits Redemptions on Private Credit Fund -* [bloomberg](https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-03-11/morgan-stanley-limits-redemptions-on-private-credit-fund-mmmlv7uj?embedded-checkout=true)
u/LarryStink
[you're timing couldn't be better](https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/1rqqngm/comment/o9wgwap/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button) LMAO
congrats if you have bets running on this
[+8] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: Reminder to every bol who voted for this retarded donkey and unironically say he's good for the market, you asked for this
[+8] u/Ok-Thought-9960: I hope the SEC can come back after this admin. This market needs some stability and enforcement, shit is WAY to yippy
[+8] u/adwise27: Just wait until Iran starts posting AI videos on tiktok of mango kissing Epstein on the lips
[+8] u/Metal-Water: Fuck my greedy ass deserves to suffer
[+8] u/Single-Adeptness-769: The lie from the orange man to try and steady this dump is about to break records
[+8] u/MeeseShoop: Back in my day, the market went up
[+8] u/bearhunter429: #This time no V-shape recovery. We'll just drill to the core of the earth. LMAO🤌
[+8] u/MidnightAlchemist: I legit get news here faster than anywhere else
[+8] u/fish_: no idea how it happened but i made decent money today
[+8] u/slightly_visibleRibs: I wonder if we'll see this week's 150th generational V
[+8] u/Valkorion335786: *"Israel's propaganda directorate being sued by unpaid activists claiming millions."*
**LMFAO**
[+8] u/Wonderful-Tomato-829: But sidious said the war is over 😮😲
[+8] u/NotMe357: "BREAKING: Cuba and China agree to strengthen bilateral ties — days after TACO floats “friendly takeover” of Cuba."
LOL 😆
[+8] u/DanqueLeChay: If you zoom in enough that was a great V
[+8] u/Ambitious-Win788: sometimes the market goes up when i jerk off
[+8] u/AdditionofDarkness: if we close below 670 it's straight to 660 no(hormuz) I'm Big 🐻
[+8] u/Fhyzikz: Yeesh MMs laying mines in my port
[+8] u/BigToadEats: You get higher gas prices and lower stocks mother fuckers eat it
[+8] u/BigToadEats: Orange is fucking dirty ass bro
[+8] u/Early-Elderberry-150: At this point, even the Antichrist appearing would probably cause SPY to pump
[+8] u/NewDawn101: Why do people bitch about DoorDash? If you don’t wanna pay fees get your lazy assess to the restaurant and pick up your shity food yourself
[+8] u/Commercial-District1: My mom in 2023: “I think Micron could be a really good stock”
Me: “Nah”
She’s way smarter than I am
[+8] u/mandoslambo: https://www.uscourts.gov/forms-rules/forms/bankruptcy-forms
Might be one of those days
[+8] u/FullCopy: - Bad news: Stagflation
- Good news: They’re serving Progresso at the soup line
[+8] u/WhoLickedMyDumpling: Every single news headline is bearish jfc
[+8] u/rdblaw: $11b in the first week of the war… the real numbers probably double. Good thing we cut Medicare can’t have these grifters spending our money
[+8] u/DanqueLeChay: 🥭: Ackshully high oil prices are good because we make a lot of money as an oil producing country
[+8] u/alien-observer-37491: Did you say thank you today?
[+8] u/elvee61: What the fuck did he say now?
[+8] u/cashflow_: THERE WILL BE NO CRYING IN THE CASINO. ACT LIKE MEN FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIVES
[+8] u/tossaway1040: There wont be any traders after this administration lmao
[+8] u/mugirawraw: Surely we break 670 on the 6th or 7th try right
[+8] u/UsernameTaken_123: Why do they need the US navy to escort, cant they just hire anyone, theres literally escorts all over the world, its the worlds oldest profession
[+8] u/I_work_too_much: This market has officially given my cancer the AIDS.
[+8] u/Soffatjockis: Flat for six months...
I am tierd of this zendaya market.
I want a Sydney sweeney kind of market.
[+8] u/fish_: i thought we were all joking about being range bound on spy for the next 3 years why didn’t you guys tell me
[+8] u/Ok_GAINZ: i dunno man, just follow price action/trend/flows everything else is just nonsense. its all the same shit over and over. Oh no, we've never survived war in the middle east and high oil. oh no, we've never survived a bubble. oh no, our government has never been shady. accept your risk, and do what your trading system is tested to do.
[+8] u/pussinbuuts: BUT, OF FAR GREATER INTEREST AND IMPORTANCE TO ME, AS PRESIDENT, IS DESTROYING THE MIDDLE EAST AND, INDEED, THE WORLD
THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER.
[+8] u/DumbbellPadawan: Strongly considering doing some edibles and just watching business news while shit posting on here. Thoughts?
[+8] u/borkdpasito: AHAHAHAHA BOLS DED
OIL babee 🛢️🚀🛢️🚀
[+8] u/bearhunter429: #America keeps bombing the shit out of Iran and Iran keeps saying "it didn't hurt it didn't hurt". This could go on for a very long time. LMAO🤌
[+8] u/zNatural: The Dow the Dow is 50,000
[+8] u/OrdinaryMix4013: Is this happening bc he touches kids
[+8] u/2020isgreat: IRAN DEPUTY FM SAYS NOT LAYING MINES IN HORMUZ STRAIT - AFP
[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2032119547352985832)
[+8] u/2020isgreat: if they just manipulate equities hard enough maybe everyone will ignore that their gas costs 200 dollars a gallon
[+8] u/No_Current3675: These fucking retards expect me to be excited about a work "retreat"??? Bro, I don't give a flying shit about your keynote speaker.
[+8] u/Initial_Ad_9250: Kendal Jenner reported to be heading for the white house with a truck full of Pepsi to end this war
[+8] u/Roygbiv-Turtle-98: we can never have -3%
so annoying
[+8] u/Own_Proposal_4931: this shit is so boring
[+8] u/RAMBO_JESUS: They are pumping this shit for exit liquidity. Market won't drop till the big boys are positioned for it. Save this comment
[+8] u/BoostMobileGuy: Dow is over 50k aged like milk
[+8] u/catfromgarfield: I'M BLEEEEEEEEDING OUTTT
[+8] u/HandsOnTheBible: Remember kids
War isn't bullish
War is gay
[+8] u/BarbellPadawan: ##The winning will continue until morale improves
[+8] u/jazzgrackle: I think instead of risking money, and losing thousands of dollars, I’m going to take the money I would have spent gambling and give it to charity at least once.
[+8] u/FlyingLineman: 🍑 - "we are done bibi?"
bibi - "no comrade premier, it has only begun"
[+8] u/Ok_Environment_3618: 🌮 fking right before elections. What's going on in his mind? Every election year politicians don't try to fuck up the economy or inflation. 🌮 can't 🌮 now. This is war
[+8] u/mayorolivia: It’s an honour losing money with yall today
[+7] u/jasherer: things arent exciting enough. We need to throw in another global pandemic with this war.
[+7] u/Panacamana: How are people still buying this crap!?
[+7] u/pleasestoptalkin: Turns out Warren wasn’t talking about the market with “be greedy when others are fearful.” He was talking about an Asian buffet, specifically the crab rangoon.
That’s why they call him Warren Buffet.
[+7] u/Organic-Lie4759: PLTR is now partnering with HIMS, war boners engorged and engaged.
[+7] u/TinyDelegation: UPVOTE FOR calls downvote for puts
[+7] u/Difficult-Ask2278: If you listen to Bodies by Drowning Pool and hit yourself in the nuts at the opening bell it releases heat shock proteins and increases dopamine and makes you a more effective trader
[+7] u/Valkorion335786: We should just pin all the debt in the world on one person and sacrifice him
I think we should pick u/jasherer
[+7] u/DrummerCompetitive20: Holy cow....PATH smashed earnings and is down 12% LOL
[+7] u/Wowmuchrya: Can Iran add Tesla to that list of hyperscalers it’s gona attack 😢
[+7] u/Sad-Substance8684: 670 is the new 680 until 650
[+7] u/2muchnet42day: TRADE TALKS GOING WELL! WAR IS VERY MUCH COMPLETE.
[+7] u/Bright_Interaction73: This 🥭 has actually gotten out of hand. I can't believe the fucking people who voted for this shit still blindly follow and support this nonsense. This is why I believe that democracy is just a big lie. I know we all just love gambling here, but come on man - how can someone support him after he bombed those kids?
[+7] u/PocaMadre69: Everything bad is fixed in 45 minutes incredible
[+7] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: LMAO STRAIGHT BACK DOWN
[+7] u/Acceptable_Eagle_775: Donnie done stepped in some shit he can't con his way out of! Damn!
[+7] u/StopLossOptional: Bull case: 🥭 escorts tankers through the straight.
Bear case: 🥭 escorts tankers through the straight and ee-ran bombs the war ships and tankers
[+7] u/pleasestoptalkin: Good thing we DOGED the federal gov agencies so we can spend more bombing Iranian schools
[+7] u/Fineous40: Won’t someone think of the DOW!
[+7] u/Sjw455: The fake pump before the dump
[+7] u/FindingZen4: Oil investors do not care that the Jones Act will be suspended. The only fix for this mess is for dumbdumb to open the Strait by force
[+7] u/longGERN: I have an exam in 30 min should I do mushrooms
[+7] u/The_Alan_Greenspan: Closed out puts and now chillin. Happy Friday!
[+7] u/EnginrA: Chat moving so fast no one will see that I love women 😳
[+7] u/illicit_FROG: No one is having fun, admit it.
[+7] u/GeneralZain1: Iranmaxxing this portfolio right now
[+7] u/soad1331: Get on the ride bols, it's fun 🌈
[+7] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: NEW: Gulf states to reassess relationship with US and seek to diversify foreign partnerships following Trump’s decision to go to war with Iran. -Reuters
[+7] u/Maximum_Light409: Friday 13 with SPY 666.
Signals...
[+7] u/yyn1999: WARNING: All signs point to an imminent Iranian terror attack on California. Stay vigilant and report suspicious activity to authorities. - Biggest false flag since 9/11 incoming
[+7] u/Senior_Lawfulness404: Bears are still ghey
[+7] u/PeaDifficult2909: We'll know it's fucked the moment Trump tweets and the market keeps going down. The market runs on 🥭 lies until it doesn't.
[+7] u/daedalus_dance: I AM LONG ON STOCKS DURING AN OIL SHOCK. AHHHHHHHH.
(thank you for your attention to this matter).
[+7] u/saw-it: Bomb Iran, V. Oil crisis, V. Drones above California, believe it or not V.
[+7] u/Fantastic_Pirate3948: Buying calls on the dip was not the play today
[+7] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: Does BIBI have videos of Trump meat riding or what ?
[+7] u/LeBhikariLe: what if DT secretly believes in climate change and is using this to accelerate the adoption of EVs and reduce dependency on oil? a man can dream
[+7] u/spectra444: Update: Shrek has gone flaccid
[+7] u/TechnologyEven6926: Treasury is full on trying to short oil
Damn man
[+7] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Helium spiking lmfao bye bye semis
[+7] u/Burtonwurton: I am in danger. This is not fun.
[+7] u/throwawaydonaldinho: Its not “Power hour” or “Sour hour”
Its always “Give your premium to the market maker” hour.
[+7] u/AdditionalMany1292: Biggest oil trade route being closed?
Calls believe it or not
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: Mango selling teslas from the front lawn seems like a lifetime ago
[+7] u/xlaco: Guess who has puts on the only green
[+7] u/Abe2025: What is this dump for ants. Shipping is closed and oil is expensive as fuck. Should be tanking hard
[+7] u/KarlLachsfeld: IRAN'S LEADER MOJTABA KHAMENEI: ALL US BASES SHOULD IMMEDIATELY BE CLOSED IN THE REGION AND THOSE BASES WILL BE ATTACKED
Man that's one dumb motherfucker.
[+7] u/dljmonkeyboiz: 95% of my "investment" portfolio activity is now in prediction markets betting where it just seems much more fair for little guys to use insider information. The other 5% is in pokemon cards.
[+7] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: Nobody is even considering how the LGBTQ's of Hormuz feel in all of this.
[+7] u/browsk: SCOTT WAPNER ON CNBC JUST CALLED RETAIL RETARDS 😂😂😂😂 he ain’t wrong lmao
[+7] u/jonneh: Two opposing views and I never trust BlackRock
#
> “*The energy-led supply chain shock is likely short-lived. We see disruptions measured in weeks, rather than in months.*”
>
> — Jean Boivin of BlackRock
#
> “*There is no policy response that can stop this ascent in crude. None.*“
>
> — Jeff Currie of Carlyle Energy
[+7] u/AcademicStandard3701: VIX is tired of playing with Oil looking for the next thing to play with
[+7] u/Thebaxxxx: I wonder how much of this sub went broke on oil futes? We are missing a few of the longtime posters ever since the big peak
[+7] u/Hot_Philosopher_6558: the most depressing thing isn't the market currenty, it's the fact that my boy jon is still bleeding after decades and him not meeting daenerys :( FINISH THE BOOKS GEORGE
[+7] u/enc-nyc: War, tariffs, Greenland, renaming the gulf. You just don't know what devastating news next week is gonna happen.
[+7] u/slightly_visibleRibs: We are stupid bears , We carry the blame
We fight for your calls, We lose the game
We are stupid bears, Cramer's courage our own
Together unbroken, we'll make our losses known
[+7] u/compileFailure_: Supreme Court tariff removal was supposed to take us to 700 right?
[+7] u/BarbellPadawan: Another day, another MSFT dip
[+7] u/BigBasilGuy: I believe 4 tankers and an oil port have been blown up since market close, so…probably green
[+7] u/SergeantThreat: But the DOW is at $5,000
[+7] u/dsubpo: I've seen enough - I'm selling everything and buying moo deng coin
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: All this talk of whore mooses. What happened to good Christian moose 🫎 porn is killing our society
[+7] u/Awuxy: Cmon fall off a cliff you know you want to bby spy
[+7] u/Independent-Tree-985: This is all very painful to trade.
[+7] u/DoIt4TheMayMays: I too used to yell into the void, now I just stare into the abyss
[+7] u/teh_herper: I guess the world cannot get enough of that sweet, sweet dino juice.
Black is the new gold
[+7] u/WELOVEWMT: Damn you bols really tried to rally? rally deez nuts
[+7] u/aftherith: Full moka pot of coffee on an empty stomach. I am headed for a jittery death fam.
[+7] u/StopLossOptional: Shorting oil and buying spy at these levels is the definition of free money.
[+7] u/Country_Gravy420: That was it. That's the V.
Yay
[+7] u/2020isgreat: US CENTCOM: 60+ Iranian vessels, 30+ minelayers damaged or destroyed - Post on X.
They aren't laying mines tho[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2032124849187856642)
[+7] u/abscando: Gonna need a mission accomplished tweet to save this day
[+7] u/ReftLight: Lower highs and lower lows.
[+7] u/im_burning_cookies: DJT said JPow needs to do an emergency rate cut - this is real
[+7] u/Crazy_Donkies: DOW at 50k was a fun day.
[+7] u/rioferdy838: Why are we red
Its not like there is a war going on
[+7] u/Concerned_Fanboy: # Iran’s new Supreme Leader says Strait of Hormuz will continue to be closed. All US bases should be immediately closed in the region: Khamenei
[+7] u/aaapod: well that was totally normal
[+7] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: "No such threat from Iran to our homeland exists, and it never did" - Karoline
SO WHY THE FUCK ARE WE THERE BITCH
[+7] u/jay4281: Never seen a clearer bear flag on QQQ. 593 by close
[+7] u/GoProVI: Where were you when they crashed the market because of a 🥭 ?
[+7] u/mcflinty_1: This just might be a fafo moment for 🥭
[+7] u/Valkorion335786: Toyota Middle East division booking record sales this quarter
[+7] u/apurimac777: i swear some of the gay bears in here are Iranian drone pilots bombing tankers
[+7] u/pmotiveforce: 3:50PM SPY is at 668.2.
Bulls:
4:00PM SPY is at 668.97
Bulls: Bers thot! Fucking doomer bers lmao lol lol LMAO Suck it bers bers thot!!!!
[+7] u/greyenlightenment: "war is over" except for attacks on tankers, oil going up ..
[+7] u/callsonputsoncalls: Hate this timeline so much
[+7] u/RemarkableVictory990: only thing bull knows how to do is run towards red
[+7] u/Maximum_Light409: My guess is they're doing to the US with Iran exactly what the US did to Russia with Ukraine.. draining its resources by forcing it into a war against someone who isn't even its main opponent. Now the Orange one is stuck in a fight that could drag on way longer than he ever wanted
[+7] u/HolographicHeart: Allan
We are so fucked
[+7] u/Difficult-Ask2278: This sub is a sub of learned doctors
[+7] u/Early-Elderberry-150: Nothing scares me more than gay ashkanazi jew tech lords.
Scam Altman, I have my eyes on you
[+7] u/beachsandwichen: Everything being this fucking flat during a war just go on and fuck off
[+7] u/SquirtleStomp: I am calling on Uber to send their 1 star rated psycho drivers to the strait and have them sail the ships, let them redeem themselves in valor
[+7] u/Sad-Substance8684: I was told by members of this community that it will be “green by open” guess it won’t open today or tomorrow
[+7] u/bigmeatbag: I'm starting to think Donnie is just eating checkers pieces instead of playing 4-D chess.
[+7] u/moorhound: What kind of dumbass logic does it take to look at everything going on and think "calls"
If you got caught with your ass out on this one, you earned the L
[+7] u/ChampagnePapi-: I got your calls right here buddy *grabs crotch*
[+7] u/2020isgreat: Maybe we just like higher gas prices
[+7] u/CumomEileen: I think I may be over-leveraged
[+7] u/WSB-mods-are-: Wild how I can get 70" 4k cheaper than a full grocery cart
[+7] u/soad1331: Bols, won't you join us for the next leg down 🌈
[+7] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: Fuck my stupid fat paperhanded chud life
[+7] u/Ecclesiastes510: Not touching this with a 10 foot pole
[+7] u/killerbeeswaxkill: I used to sit in my car and let it idle for hours while I browsed this subreddit now I can’t afford that luxury.
[+7] u/31andnotdone: carvana just texted me to tell me my car value increased significantly
inflation leak.
[+7] u/Sick0h: Did Iran steal the word ayatollah from Italian grandmothers? I-uh tol-yah not to do that
[+7] u/PropheticMurmurs: The very gayest type of day is a tightly rangebound red day.
Premiums sky high and no moves big enough to justify buying.
[+7] u/justlosinmoney: Fuck it ban me again
[+7] u/According-Page8618: last time we closed below 670 was 17 december. we went to 692 in a week after
[+7] u/Axonum: If you buy the dip, you are regarded.
[+7] u/spreadbetfred: Oil spiking because Diddy released.
[+7] u/HonestScar7176: I think longer dated puts is the play. This is financial advice.
[+7] u/BigShmokeBuffer: In the immortal words of Winston Churchill:
We will fight them on the beaches,
Goddamn I love these peaches,
Gonna have you seein’ Jesus,
These Iranian baddies gon teach us
[+7] u/thumpasaurus: he could just call a presser saying "i just got off the phone with lloyd of london, wonderful guy very smart guy, mr london tells me he reinstated every insurance policy on every tanker scheduled to go through the strait and in fact he tells me he's going to be insuring even more tankers very strongly" and spy would hit 700
[+7] u/twistnblaze: puke worthy price action
[+6] u/dokutarodokutaro: 3 presidents in a row that wear diapers and 2 of them are the same fucking guy.
[+6] u/OkSuccotash258: Wow, first time I'm hearing this
[+6] u/Temporary-Alarm-744: That’s a false flag set up by kash patel
[+6] u/Unlikely-Run-400: lol how tf is that possible! It broke 669 and should have continued based of common sense trading technical analysis. It just jumps right tf up after hitting 668. I cannot wait for this POS spy to crash.
[+6] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: 🥭 will tweet that they have a deal or something even if he's just talking out of his ass
[+6] u/KomradeKruschenko: Maybe the "watch the V" bulls have their phone upside down.
[+6] u/SkyeJack: THE DOW IS AT 50000. WHY AREN'T WE TALKING ABOUT THAT?
[+6] u/mold_motel: Everything is made of plastic and plastic is made of oil jus sayin'
[+6] u/SoloOutdoor: Biggest blunder in the history of war. Thats what the history will write for 🥭
[+6] u/kazkeb: It's going to be fucking hilarious when SPY starts to pump at 3:30 after hood force closes all the 0dte calls
[+6] u/Gom_KBull: Bols are still expecting SPY 700 next week LMAO
[+6] u/Ecclesiastes510: Very proud of myself that I didn’t give gains back 🤷
[+6] u/Vegetable_Push6542: One oil tanker making a beeline through the Strait of Hormuz but getting set ablaze everyone knows the rules
[+6] u/UsernameTaken_123: Boy I sure hope Iran doesnt target datacenters pushing the price of GPUs and HBM2 even higher wink wink
[+6] u/b1mm3rl1f3: I’m in a UberX (not comfort) Tesla with lottery tickets in the visor. The economy is in shambles
[+6] u/TheMagpulMaster: This sub is so bearish. SPY 675 EoD
[+6] u/Nicksicurella: If 667 doesn’t hold I think we see 660 pretty soon after
[+6] u/TraipseTraveller: I'm tired of losing!
[+6] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: additional tanker struck today 35NM off the coast of Jebel Ali, UAE. nobody but UKMTO is warning or speaking of these events with severity
[+6] u/Disconn3cted: In the end, the only difference between us and the insiders is that the insiders have more money. So uh, fuck...
[+6] u/pussinbuuts: entire trillion dollar market moving on the same exact chart
[+6] u/Rich-Badger-7601: Lmao did they hit another tanker
[+6] u/Me-Regarded: Wait, am I exit liquidity??
[+6] u/jonneh: Is Dow still at 50k? 💀
[+6] u/Gom_KBull: # Oh... you still believe there might be a rate cut...
# Oh dear... the retardation is exceptionally strong with this one.
[+6] u/darth_scion: Today you are the bottom
[+6] u/Vort3x7689: Market is really just inverse oil lmao
[+6] u/Weak-Equal-9084: Can i get everybodys attention guys? Thank you for your attention
[+6] u/sloanemonroe: God, I wish I knew their true mechanisms that they are using to keep the market afloat right now. Government buying? Collusion between all the big money management companies? Government working with money managers? All of it? Something else?
[+6] u/Wise_Ticket_5093: Calls because it doesn’t make sense
[+6] u/diddidntreddit: How long will the market bleed? I'm trying to get rich, not go broke
Thank you for your attention to this matter!! R.T.D.
[+6] u/chainerection: Mango vs Mr Iran on WWE Saturday Night
[+6] u/OkSuccotash258: Ok but did you consider DOW FIFTY THOUSAND
[+6] u/FrancisBitter: It’s maybe a little bit surprising that the US-Iranian war actually _did_ manage to distract from the Stein of Ep files this time.
[+6] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: And here comes the criminal V, didn’t even last a fucking minute before the endless buying resumed.
[+6] u/TrollerCoasterWoo: Khamenei waited until market open to tell the bulls to go fuck themselves
[+6] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: Wonder what rabbit 🌮 pulls out to manipulate the market this time.
One can only say the war is almost over so many times
[+6] u/daddysgirl794: Feels like the market is still not fully pricing this in, I'm not convinced until we have a -5% day
[+6] u/darth_scion: Calls on Fallout season 3 being a reality show
[+6] u/softboiledjadepotato: Top contender for most dogshit day I've ever seen 🏆
[+6] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: How close to 0.0% can they get spy by 9:30? Tune in to todays episode of "Mysteriously Propped Up Market" to find out!
[+6] u/drigocien12: Hims&Hers short?
[+6] u/SwiftSG1: winning Iran war = end one more war = Nobel peace prize
[+6] u/HARCYB-throwaway: I smoked weed with Brent Crude on top of the white house
[+6] u/TurbodToilet: Holy fuck is APPLE drilling for the oil?
[+6] u/CulturalConclusion76: SPY will never be above 670 ever again
[+6] u/Competitive_Ride: He needs a decisive blow to find a way to TACO. Watch for a big hit to Iran that they all hype up in media. They need a narrative that they won to back out
[+6] u/2020isgreat: So did markets just expect the FM to admit they were breaking international law by mining the strait or what
[+6] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: looks like $100/barrel is the starting point
[+5] u/Abe2025: Ive seen way harder dips than this
[+5] u/browsk: Ok this is getting a bit crazy, why am I scared buying calls on this
[+5] u/NlNJANEER: Situation getting worse by the day
Bols: the bottom is in
[+5] u/Metacog_Drivel: Did he try declaring victory again? That's a neat trick.
[+5] u/illicit_FROG: Most other days I would feel like this is the bottom....
[+5] u/stupidber: Going to Dubai to lay some pipe and bring our oil home
[+5] u/Stop_The_Rain: Every small rise is being killed... Theta then finishes the job!
[+5] u/ChickpeaOnMe: If stocks rally, I swear I am going to pinch everyone's little pink cocks right off!
[+5] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: The stories I could tell you about Brent Crude from middle school would blow your mind
[+5] u/colinr813: Ready for the 10 am fake and gay pump that has happened literally everyday for the past week?