▶ Full Post Text
[+238] u/stupidber: I'm Johnny Knoxville and this is Hormuz Speedboat
[+149] u/5StarMan94: What idiot put the Strait of Hormuz next to Iran?
[+104] u/MrYOLOMcSwagMeister: They should ban algorithms from doing stock trading. Make it organic regards only again
[+99] u/WingedScapula420: As a consumer, one of the best parts of my day is when costs get passed on to me.
[+93] u/Les7X: Hormuz Straight is named after the Hormuz Island, located near the coast of Iran. This is a subtle reference to the fact that, on another island, a bunch of biliona\_ REDACTED
[+74] u/OSRSkarma: US FEB. CONSUMER PRICES RISE 0.3% M/M; EST. +0.3%
US FEB. CONSUMER PRICES RISE 2.4% Y/Y; EST. +2.4%
US FEB. CORE CPI RISES 0.2% M/M; EST. +0.2%
US FEB. CORE CPI RISES 2.5% Y/Y; EST. +2.5%
E: to all the slow individuals… this doesn’t include the oil price increase and other shenanigans from the last few weeks
[+66] u/yayahi: How this market isn’t already blood red is beyond me. Shits fucked yo
[+63] u/jnas_19: FBI HAS WARNED POLICE DEPARTMENTS IN CALIFORNIA THAT IRAN WANTS TO RETALIATE FOR AMERICAN ATTACKS BY LAUNCHING OFFENSIVE DRONES AGAINST THE WEST COAST -ABC NEWS
[+60] u/Appropriate_Sky_4509: Wake up son
Actually nvm go back to bed
[+58] u/LostandConfused2024: Traded my way from 23k to 48k over six months. Not entirely sure why, but I decided to buy options for the first time in years (blew up my portfolio years ago).
In the last two weeks, I’ve gone from: 48k—>52k—>33k—>43k—>28k—>46k—->50k.
Now that I’ve hit 50k again, I am going back to trading shares.
[+58] u/Anchises1: This administration is a disaster
[+47] u/Sighnce: 🚨 IRAN HAS JUST RELEASED SHARKS WITH LASER BEAMS ATTACHED TO THEIR HEADS IN STRAIT OF HORMUZ, SOURCES SAY
[+46] u/Historical_Cover8133: God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
- Mark Twain
[+45] u/orsomeshitidk: It’s crazy how much better the world would be if boomers just had loving parents lmao
[+44] u/athlejm: 3 cargo ships hit this morning in the Strait. SPY is flat green…
[+43] u/peterpeer9: they want you to think ai is taking your job so you don’t realize the economy is dead lmao
layoffs aren’t happening because of ai.
that’s the convenient narrative nobody wants to challenge.
the real reason is we’re in a massive recession caused by covid inflation that literally gutted every consumer.
we had it good for like 2 years until we started to see the aftermath of Trump doubling the money supply…
but nobody wants to say we are in one out loud lmao
blaming ai sounds futuristic and inevitable so no one questions it.
way easier than admitting the money printer broke everything and everything is a disaster lmao
when they give you something shiny to blame they’re hiding something ugly behind it
[+42] u/Star_Lord924: Yeah wtf just happened. Theres no fucking towers left to even hit.
[+40] u/saintmitchy: Bessent is shorting oil futures with our tax dollars?
No one is more qualified for this job than the former hedge fund manager that lost 90 PERCENT of the fund’s assets
[+39] u/31andnotdone: "Sorry, I can't make a meme depicting a mentally challenged person"
AI is really useless.
[+39] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Man... they got lazy asf with these numbers 🤣🤣🤣 said fuck it let me just copy whatever Wall St is expecting
[+39] u/orsomeshitidk: Yall have no idea how many west Texas degenerates are taking out loans on brand new dodge ram 3500 duallys with these oil prices lmao
[+38] u/fredditf: CPI (MoM) (Feb) 0.3% vs 0.3% EST
CPI (YoY) (Feb) 2.4% vs 2.4% EST
Core CPI (MoM) (Feb) 0.2% vs 0.2% EST
Core CPI (YoY) (Feb) 2.5% vs 2.5% EST
[+38] u/Sweg_OG: my cat started eating less out of nowhere so I took her to the vet where they hospitalized her when they found her kidneys were failing. she didnt respond to thousands of dollars of treatment so I took her home and have been managing with pain meds for her. She acts mostly like herself and is still eating (she has almost eaten an entire jumbo container of treats in a few days) but she is also clearly unwell and doesnt do much other than enjoy her spot in the window. this has been the worst week of my life and I don't know what to do. I dont want to prolong her suffering but she's not telling me shes ready yet and neither am I but I worry I'm just deluding myself. Fuck guys, hold those you love close, life is so terrible
[+38] u/awetfartruinedmylife: big beautiful rug, persian rug even
[+37] u/decjr06: I sense a bloody day incoming
[+36] u/Retaining-Wall: If you strike a container ship, is it now a dispenser ship?
[+36] u/cromwest: I'm sure dumping historic levels of oil reserves into the market after week 1 of the war is a good sign that the regime is about to collapse any minute now.
[+34] u/31andnotdone: remember my fellow bers, you're one 🥭 lie away from losing your gains
[+34] u/NervousChemistry7401: Iran actually striking ships today… oof.
[+32] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: #iran is in possession of theta missiles
[+31] u/Panthera__Tigris: European and Asian markets are down 5%-7% since the war. US markets barely down at all.
Part of it might be because US is a net exporter of crude and part of it might be due to the AI bull run.
But that might soon come crashing down because South Korea and Taiwan are having natural gas shortages now which are needed to make chemicals and other inputs in chips.
Honestly, I just feel like it is being artificially propped up given the fall in literally every other major market.
[+30] u/mks_csw: I love trading, its my job. Except, i dont get paid to do it. I acutally pay to do it.
[+29] u/OrangMiskin: Right wing dads beating their wives because the gas price is too high
[+29] u/confused_teabagger: If those ships that got hit interfere with my girl getting her tight ass into some cheaply made Shein jeans, I'm going to be be pissed!
[+29] u/SoloOutdoor: Hey guys we're gonna bomb you, dont setup any defense. If you did, take it down.
~Downald
[+28] u/colinr813: CPI analysts be like: just as I predicted LMAO🤌🏻
[+28] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: I’m from the future. It’s a red day
[+27] u/Domefieldadvantage: https://preview.redd.it/umv34zlb9gog1.jpeg?width=1277&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4f4fc9be4c907307f928bee757062f7300de2646
[+26] u/t65789: All of this because the McDonalds CEO did not eat his burger.
[+26] u/freehugzforu2: Up to 14 ships attacked… 🤔 stay down oil let me buy more calls
[+26] u/Neat-Concentrate-239: BULLS SUDDENLY REVIEWING THEIR THEORY THAT A GLOBAL CONFLICT WHICH DISRUPTS A LARGE SUPPLY OF THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT RESOURCE ON THE PLANET IS BULLISH.
ANIMALS
[+23] u/TakeThatBro: Is the bull market in the room with us right now?
[+23] u/darkspherei: call trump gordan ramsay the way he be cooking those cpi numbers
[+23] u/SchwiftySchwifferson: BREAKING: U.S. ANNOUNCES SURRENDER TO IRAN
[+22] u/callsonreddit: The rumors are true
I am a cat
[+22] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: "Oil companies should just use the strait"
Mr President 2 shipping vessels were shot to shit when they did
[+22] u/Upset-Motor-2602: If the president and his cabinet can lie and manipulate the markets, what is stopping CEOs from doing the same? It's not like the SEC will prosecute them, especially if all it takes is a donation to the ballroom project.
[+22] u/Thebaxxxx: 👍
https://preview.redd.it/bvqsmmykjeog1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d2790d411c89d6228d2a844373a35f0775bc03fe
[+22] u/spectra444: What just happened lol
[+21] u/Jimbeauxer: I ate a metric fuck ton of food last night and had a double espresso for breakfast and not a sign of a morning plop. Asshole more tied up than strait of Hormuz
[+21] u/hv876: Sure buddy, there is no inflation.
[+21] u/Usedillusion7: 🥭 literally has a history and track record of destroying anything he touches but y'all thought the market/country was going to be immune?
[+20] u/Pitiful-Ad769: I don’t think there’s ever been a time where the human race has had so much knowledge yet been so collectively stupid
[+20] u/2020isgreat: The tankers being hit by drones is a nothing burger THERE ARE MINES IN THE STRAIT
[+20] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Tankers on fire = bullish
[+20] u/ecoburner87: If you haven't been following the last day or so, Bessent and the Treasury are reportedly using our tax dollars to short oil futures. The correlation it has to DXY strength (and inverse correlation with stock prices) while actively adding liquidity to the market, has been propping up QQQ/SPY and much of the market.
The risk of our government manipulating futures, there are many, but the biggest is that they can be squeezed like anyone else.
[+20] u/2020isgreat: FRENCH PRESIDENT MACRON SAYS G7 HAS AGREED SITUATION DOES NOT JUSTIFY LIFTING SANCTIONS ON RUSSIA[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2031754697804272107)
[+20] u/louis-debroglie: Three ships are on fire in the strait and you idiots are talking about watching some go through on marinetraffic
Go and look at the marinetraffic image vs the satellite image
GPS in that area is completely jammed and AIS is spoofed
[+20] u/collegefootballfan69: My guess Greta Thunberg is secretly working with the Iranians to close the Straits of Hormuz. Never underestimate the pain a woman can cause. Calls on TSLA
[+20] u/delicious_oppai: Lol Cramer calling for complete destruction of infrastructure and killing of civilians to win the war. US fucked.
[+19] u/nthnreallymatters: its actually a joke at this point how fundamentals are completely irrelevant
50 years of stock picking and analysis down the drain
i wonder what actual hedge funds with billions to manage are doing
[+19] u/illicit_FROG: You guys are aware there is a rapist with dementia running this shit right?
[+19] u/cannythecat: 🥭 is desperately trying to TACO but Israel is saying no LMAO
[+19] u/Dazzling_Breath5940: Guys I'm starting to get a strong suspicion that this market may be manipulated....
[+19] u/Send_Lawyers: Iran saying get ready for $200 oil. Bullish
https://x.com/firstsquawk/status/2031698070673744363?s=46
[+18] u/djln491: This sub is hilarious today with these swings. As soon as one side chimes in to shit on the other spy reverses
[+18] u/orsomeshitidk: I’m gonna be 20 min late to work but I never take a lunch so I dare that hr bitch Tammy to say some shit
[+18] u/PickleRickleTV: Imagine starting a war with Iran and not stocking up the SPR when oil was $55 a barrel. I’m starting to think there is no plan 🤔
[+18] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: Cramer what a piece of shit .. he literally said we should keep bombing Iran until they open the strait and he was referencing bombing a hospital during Vietnam to make the Vietnamese surrender just wow .. dog turd
[+18] u/ChickenYip: 🥭 BE LIKE : "Ending the war is important, but doing whatever Israel says is IMPORTANTER!! "
[+18] u/cloudsofgrey: fake CPI numbers that will be revised upward silently later
[+18] u/ThaddeusJP: I wish I had the guts (stupidity?) some people here have to make options plays.
I see people turn 10k into six figures in a day. Meanwhile I just stare my entire portfolio getting smaller and smaller every day because I'm to chicken to do anything.
That coupled with this nightmare administration, it is gonna put me back to no gain at all before the end of the year.
[+17] u/trumpdiego: ##Roaring 20's 🤝 Global Depression that spirals into WorldWar
[+17] u/Usedillusion7: It's almost as if the Epstein files have been completely memory holed and are now a thing of the past. Funny how that little trick keeps working over and over again.
[+17] u/Concerned_Fanboy: honestly I love it when gas prices spike cuz all the mongoloids who own trucks and SUVs get really angry and loud
[+17] u/OkRecommendation1040: HOLY FUCKING SHIT IVE ENTERED 8 DIFFERENT FICKING TRADES AND EVERY SINGLE ONE GOES THE OPPOSITE WAY WTFFFFFFFFFF
[+17] u/hermeskino715: 🥭: There's nothing left to hit on Iran
🥭: Not finish hitting Iran
[+17] u/br0botic: Iran “aspired” to attack California with drones the same way I “aspire” to date Sydney Sweeney
[+17] u/TraipseTraveller: Five Guys sounds amazing right now. Anyone got a spare $30 for 1 hamburger and French fries?
[+17] u/pen15_club_admin: Why everyone want crude oil and not polite oil??
[+17] u/Glock7enteen: Market was higher in September 2025 than it is today
6 months of zero growth
[+17] u/Swaggerpro: I know no one gives a fuck and people are making money hand over fist but I cannot for the life of me seem to make any good moves and I don’t think I’ve literally ever been in the positive. So this is goodbye. Emptied my brokerage, done with this shit. Done with the bullshit in every facet of my life lmfao. Fuck this country, fuck this world, and good luck out there regards.
tHaNK YoU For YoUr AtTENtioN TO ThIs mAtter!!!
[+17] u/moorhound: Axios 3 hours ago: Trump tells Axios there's "practically nothing left" to target in Iran
Bloomberg just now: Trump Flags Prospect of Striking Even More Iran Sites
Is this that Orwell book put into practice or something
[+16] u/greyenlightenment: lol love how the CPI is exact. it's like "let's make the numbers exact ..each one ..that will convince ppl it's real"
[+16] u/cryptopolymath: So the whole @ss Pentagon with a $1.5T budget couldn’t see Hormuz was a choke point? What do they do all day? Eat crab legs?
[+16] u/Silly-Group-8632: Believe it or not. Calls.
[+16] u/Specialist_Fig9458: It’s insane the straight of Hormuz is shut down and oil tankers are being hit with no end in sight and we’ve barely budged lol
[+16] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Puts this shit isn’t real
[+16] u/ThatGuyDan123: I have to come clean. Sometimes im not in anything and just make fun of whichever side is losing .
[+16] u/civillyRange: 🥭 war will end soon
🥭 Strikes will continue for 2 more weeks
2 weeks where have I heard that before LMAO
[+16] u/Bubbledood: I have exposed myself to the market and the market has reacted accordingly
[+16] u/bearhunter429: #NOTHING in the world is more manipulated than option prices. I refuse to believe I can move option chain of a $2 trillion company by 5% simply by putting a buy order for one contract. LMAO🤌
[+16] u/jda823: It seems oil might have.... ran out of gas
[+16] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: Last I heard Brent Crude almost died after that WTI he contracted
[+16] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: President of peace everybody
[+16] u/saduglystoopid: BRING BACK SLEEPY JOE
[+16] u/OrangMiskin: The USA did so well in the regime change and nation building department in Vietnam, Iraq and Afghanistan. Let’s do it again with Iran.
[+16] u/Retaining-Wall: Guys, is it gay to attack a fanatical theocracy in the most volatile part of the world where there also happens to be large amounts of the economy's Go-Go Juice, at the whims of a second fanatical theocracy, with little or nothing to gain?
[+16] u/Usedillusion7: Sometimes scrolling this sub is just a visual fartnoise.
[+16] u/Aggressive-Ad-2707: They should change WeBull name to WeBear and its ticker to BEAR. Absolute shit stock
[+16] u/saintmitchy: My puts are destroyed because people can’t identify an obvious lie from someone known for lying
[+15] u/AndItsThetaAgain: You don’t understand the market?
Here’s Margot Robbie in a bubble bath to explain
🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🧖🏼♀️🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧
[+15] u/D1rtD3mon: my tin foil hat says that they are lying about inflation so they can cut rates
[+15] u/x2eliah: Oil producers need to learn some tricks from the food and beverage industry, and shrink the size of barrels.
[+15] u/WingedScapula420: I think we’ll just put our own mines in the Strait, they’ll never see it coming
[+15] u/Particular-Cake-6430: The new scam for NVDA is to partner with a company but then cancel it 6 months later.
[+15] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: Just looking for 10k gain today, is that really too much to ask?
[+15] u/confused_teabagger: >European Union issues new sanctions on Iran
That should help everything. Thanks, EU!
[+15] u/Street-Badger: Bears are right to be pissed, market is not pricing in any current events lol. Fake prewar inflation figures are pointless.
[+15] u/justaddcatalyst: Start war, go play golf, blame libs, grift a bit, taco
[+15] u/brannock_: I have never seen markets as fraudulent as these.
[+15] u/31andnotdone: some of you are gambling on 7 different platforms while having a lunchable as your meal at your miserable 9-5 and it shows
[+15] u/necarpenter417: I should cash out while im green. But 18k to make $50 doesn't feel right
[+15] u/Gom_KBull: # May 2026: Bols celebrating SPY climbing up over 640, declaring bers ded
[+15] u/lessoninprogress: This market has no problem ripping up on fake news but almost impossible to bring it down with the reality of global economics
[+15] u/Xzlk: This is actually so fucking ass
[+15] u/According-Page8618: perfectly balanced and everything is perfectly priced in. +0% day
[+15] u/Gom_KBull: **swings up:** BER THOT
**swings down:** *silence*
**swings up:** BERS THOT
**swings down:** *silence*
[+15] u/ALittleWorseEveryday: This will get buried so no one will see I lost $450k and also have a small p p
[+15] u/SaveTheAles: We have to start rationing gas. If your license plate ends in an even number you get gas on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. If its odd you get drafted to the next great oil war.
[+15] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: 🚨 TRUMP ON HITTING IRAN: NOT FINISHED YET
[+15] u/Vegetable_Push6542: One fraudulent V pump to green everybody knows the rules
[+15] u/FxSpecter: My uber driver was a hot blonde white chick. It's over boys, pack it up.
[+14] u/optionsCone: Loving yourself starts with liking yourself, which starts with respecting yourself, which starts with thinking of yourself in positive ways ✨
[+14] u/emanresu711: Made about 10k last year in traditional ira account. Deposited 7k into Roth and now lost it all. I’m fine
[+14] u/Emilio___Molestevez: LITERAL DRONE WAR: HAPPENING
$ONDS: GUESS I'LL DIE
[+14] u/2020isgreat: DONALD TRUMP IS PREPARING TO LAUNCH NEW TARIFF INVESTIGATIONS INTO MULTIPLE COUNTRIES OVER ALLEGED UNFAIR TRADE PRACTICES, ACCORDING TO THE WALL STREET JOURNAL.
AHAHA[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2031801831245160863)
[+14] u/2020isgreat: BREAKING: Iran announces that facilities associated with major US technology companies could become targets next.
Amazon about to show why they had a projected 200B capex they about to send the mercs
[+14] u/BrownDog42069: I would like to take this moment to remind everyone of the greatest debate that ever took place: how many days are there in a week
https://web.archive.org/web/20150105082427/https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=107926751
[+14] u/pink_ego_box: Iran Army says all boats in the Strait that are associated with US, Israel or their allies are a legitimate target.
Israel Defense Minister says that the fight will continue without any time limit.
Calls on fertilizer manufacturers with no Middle East exposure and LATAM oil.
[+14] u/Whatevs56: Haha Donnie really fucked up
[+14] u/Spicyboi981: They might actually bankrupt the country the way they’re trying to prop this rn
[+14] u/All_FIREdUp: The U.S. horribly miscalculating this war and tanking the entire global economy is *funny* and I’m tired of pretending it’s not
[+14] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: Dude bloomberg is on fire today, they ripping him apart, loving it
[+14] u/throwawaydonaldinho: If I was a sleeper cell I would simply not wake up and just keep living in LA plowing latinas.
[+14] u/aphel_ion: “The regional war will soon enter a new phase,” the official said, speaking on condition of anonymity. “As we said from the very beginning, if the United States makes such a mistake, the situation will become far more complex. Soon, another key strait will face the same fate as the Strait of Hormuz”
Well that’s nice
[+14] u/lonewolf210: How is oil barely up when multiple ships are on fire in the strait of Hormuz?
[+14] u/drpa1n: Wish my parents would have named me Brent Crude
[+14] u/miata_only: US military isn't even using it's newest toys. F16s? Apache helicopters? Tomahawks? That's all 90s gear or earlier. Once we bust out the Area51 tech this thing is donezo.
[+14] u/Star_Lord924: This is probably one of the worst fucking SPY action days i have been watching in awhile. Its the most pathetic thinf ive witnessed and its pissing me the fuck off. Go up you whore piece of shit
[+14] u/NeedToMakeMoneyz: Today is the seventh day of “the straight will be open soon”
[+13] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: I was told they were decimated and the war was basically over.
[+13] u/Bxdwfl: Cpi expectations are 0.3%, so naturally, we come in at 0.2%.
[+13] u/ResidentPack4103: Fk Cramer just called nvda 200...selling all at open
[+13] u/ThermalChaser: Told the wife the argument is complete but she's still yelling at me. No fair.
[+13] u/stupidber: I survived! Surgery went well.
[+13] u/NVDAismyg0d: Donnie cannot wait to call out a cease fire (fake news) and the markets will pump 2% to ATH
[+13] u/spreadbetfred: What’s the point of premarket when all of the trading is done before the main hours?
[+13] u/31andnotdone: https://preview.redd.it/rfxllklgmeog1.png?width=1536&format=png&auto=webp&s=0d07d4424e3499dfde3ed88019689b79ce49a823
[+13] u/StonklordBenno: RELEASE THE ~~EPSTEIN FILES~~ STRATEGIC OIL RESERVES
[+13] u/McClintockC: Generational mine laying opportunity
[+13] u/According-Page8618: cpi good: market goes down
cpi bad: market goes down
cpi flat: market goes down
[+13] u/Val44x: Strait won’t be open for another month lmao
[+13] u/kodaksdad2020: United States has launched coordinated missile strikes against the inflation. Pretty much almost completely destroyed
[+13] u/aqjingson: It’s important to buy a small position in the direction you don’t want as offering to market algo gods so it reverses in the way you actually want 👍
[+13] u/Gom_KBull: The feds injecting money into this market to keep it propped up
feels like a parent trying to nudge along their kid on a bike to help them get a good start going
but the parent forgot that their kid doesnt have legs.
[+13] u/oscillatingoctopi: Market navigating the strait with no escort
[+13] u/moorhound: "We destroyed Irans missile launch capability. Also, Irans launching ICBMs at California"
"We completely obliterated the Iranian navy by Day 2. Also, we're now sinking a bunch on minelaying ships, don't ask where they came from. And I don't think they laid any mines"
"We've completed all of our objectives way ahead of schedule, wars pretty much done. Also we're selecting more targets and we might need another month or so"
I'm starting to think these guys might be lying
[+13] u/cryptoguy66: This market is like a meth head on a pogo stick
[+13] u/ten7four: If stocks were groceries
Sees $1 bag of chips: "Wow. Weren't these $2 last week? No way I'm touching that garbage."
One week later chips are now $3: "Wow. I will now buy your chips."
[+13] u/Far-Requirement9180: Just put the oil in the bag bro
[+13] u/glazedds: is power hour in the room with us right now
[+13] u/Star_Lord924: Hoping today pumps into green fucking oblivion.
[+13] u/2020isgreat: HedgeFunds should just start saying they'll buy out a company then short it after they say they aren't
[+13] u/wildcat1055: All I know is that it will dump at open, then i'll buy calls, then it will dump some more.
[+13] u/Bam2458: Pretty sure the market just does the exact opposite of futures from the night before.
[+13] u/orsomeshitidk: I really been wanting to resign from my vol fire dept but man the dept sticker on my pickup has gotten me out of so many tickets over the years.
[+13] u/kriegkopf: bill ackman keeps replying to pakistani fake AI posts. short his IPO
[+13] u/Soft_Ladder_7894: ships are literally being attacked how we not dumping?????
someone explain plz
[+13] u/McKoijion: Nonstop propaganda on CNBC lol
[+13] u/isolated-cat: IRAN'S FOREIGN MINISTER ON X: A BRANCH OF IRAN'S OLDEST BANK WAS BOMBED WHILE FULL OF EMPLOYEES, IRANIAN ARMED FORCES WILL EXACT RETRIBUTION FOR THIS 'CRIME'
war is far from over. they just created bs headlines based off of that stupid's comments to manipulate energy prices temporarily. max pain this summer when inflation will be at all time high
[+13] u/Val44x: Find someone who loves you like spy loves 675.00
[+13] u/Axonum: BREAKING: IRAN DEPLOYS NUCLEAR-ARMED SHARKS WITH HEAD-MOUNTED LASERS TO THE STRAIGHT OF HORMUZ - SOURCES SAYS
[+13] u/Anonymustafar: Probably the wimpiest ban bet I ever saw dude
[+12] u/Ok_Worldliness_2902: When Oil crosses 90-95 get ready for 'talks going well' reports in an effort to calm the market
[+12] u/31andnotdone: i purposefully create option losses to hyperfocus on so i dont have to grieve the woman i once was
[+12] u/GalacticPlutoBear: Could’ve made 150. Now I’m down 2K. Got greedy
[+12] u/iAmGrimTV: SPY you're gonna go to a farm, a big farm, all your friends are gonna be there and you'll be laughing and running around
[+12] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: Wtf did he just said, ‘they’ll never be able to build that country back’, i thought we were going to free the people not nuke them
[+12] u/andytobbles: Deadass if Iran was to hit America with ICBMs I genuinely think we would nuke them lmao. Direct hits on American soil has always been the straw that breaks the camels back.
[+12] u/2020isgreat: U.S. INTERIOR SECRETARY SAYS IT'S REASONABLE TO EXPECT THAT VENEZUELA COULD BE A 4 MILLION BARREL OIL DAY CONTRIBUTOR
LMFAO[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2031800902365896822)
[+12] u/mandoslambo: Nothing matters till 8:30 when CPI comes out
[+12] u/yoloswaggggggggg: War being over was a concept.
[+12] u/Elforas_Tero: Bers are running out of ammo. After being proven that war means nothing, that the straight means nothing, the oil prices, nothing. Now they are PRAYING that the most succulent cooked CPI goes in their way. Pathetic. Disgusting.
[+12] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: God forbid we have an actual down day, like a circuit breaker down day.
[+12] u/HowLongCanIMakeACock: I’m forklift certified btw
[+12] u/brute-forced: Fake numbers from clown show
[+12] u/kairepaire: War still going on. Oil production reduced for weeks to come at a minimum. Jobs data still bad, even unrevised. Private credit still rekt. *YET THE MARKETS ARE UP*
This is a divergence you can use to your advantage. The market is out of step from reality
[+12] u/civillyRange: CPI comes in on point but market still falls
Everybody know numbers are fake and ghey
[+12] u/yayahi: This uber to the airport was $100 and normally it’s $70. Short fucking everything bruh
[+12] u/vermilli21: That must be the fakest data I ever saw. What a 🤡 market
[+12] u/deathlyharry: REPORT:
U.S. Diplomats considering bargaining directly with put holders over Iran
[+12] u/TheBlueBlaze: Call me naive, but I feel like the headline "Three Cargo Ships Attacked On Important Cargo Route" is going to be interpreted as bad news and reflect that today.
[+12] u/Anonymustafar: Not really feeling a trade today
[+12] u/sloanemonroe: lol. Have you ever seen anything like this? They are trying so hard to keep this market from going negative.
[+12] u/OkRecommendation1040: JUST FUCKING GO DOWN WTFFFFFFF
[+12] u/cannythecat: Bulls were celebrating and dancing last night
[+12] u/SquirtleStomp: Just remember if youre having a bad day at work, at least you didnt go on national TV as a supply chain analyst and not know what the strait of hormuz is
[+12] u/Fineous40: I wonder how many Supreme Court justices are in the non-released files? Probably 2 at least.
[+12] u/2020isgreat: Trump on reopening Strait of Hormuz: It's working out very well.
the new"The trade talks are going well"
[+12] u/probablyuntrue: Look, we may not know what we’re doing in Iran
But uh…
[+12] u/weewoowewoooo: This market is so fucking untradeable lmfao I’m out
[+12] u/AppleJuiceTwo: Wow all of this organic buy pressure keeping it perfectly at 675
[+12] u/Vegetable_Push6542: One false flag to drum up public support for Operation Iranian Freedom everybody knows the rules
[+12] u/DJ_LilSmoke: Shes a 10 but is across the strait
[+12] u/Independent-Tree-985: A reminder that some of you bought real estate in the metaverse and bragged about it
[+12] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: Trump said he wants WAR OVER, BIBI showed him one of his old island videos. WAR IS BACK
[+12] u/Usedillusion7: I'm starting to think 🥭 might just be a tad bit compromised.
[+12] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Tomorrow is gearing up to be a -3% day
[+12] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: 10 more minutes then i can finally focus on work for 1 hour
[+12] u/0mica0: The Land of the Fee.
[+12] u/stupidber: The reason we hate our jobs is because we don't like them.
[+12] u/gayforgoblin: I trimmed my NBIS yesterday to buy RDDT and HIMS lmaooooooo fuck this life
[+12] u/BadBoyBilbo: Books so cooked they call it Bobby Flay.
[+12] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Today is a -2% kind of day
[+12] u/CPA-hole: Good thing our Strategic Petroleum Reserve is full
[+12] u/hv876: We gone have 0% rates, $300 oil, no jobs, yet the greatest economy there is.
[+12] u/civillyRange: I could live off 500K for the rest of my life
Im 99 years old
[+12] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: [UK Maritime Trade Operations Alerts](https://x.com/UK_MTO?s=20)
over four attacks reported in the strait in the last 7 hours
[+12] u/colinr813: They have Cramer nice and coked up
[+12] u/orsomeshitidk: I always tell the security guys at work to have a good evening when I leave but the truth is I don’t really care
[+12] u/saw-it: Market when ships are attacked in the Hormuz: 😴😴😴😴😴😴😴😴😴😴😴
Market when NVDA announces a $2 billion investment: shhhiiiieeeeetttttt 📈📈📈📈📈📈📈📈📈📈📈📈
[+12] u/spectra444: at least I'm not bored anymore but I am down tremendously
[+12] u/vanceraa: i think all the metaltards from the slv rally moved to oil
[+12] u/Pulled_Forward: If 🥭 thought oil prices would be under control then why has there been nonstop oil propaganda news and leaks?
Venezuela oil
oil reserves that lasts to three weeks tops
Fake news tweets about tanker navy escorts
Very much complete
Mining ships and navy destroyed
Russian oil waivers
New Us oil refinery
And yet; the oil supply stays at a trickle with only China getting Iranian oil because this admin is too pussy to hit Iran where it hurts
Seems like a lot of desperation to me
[+12] u/neo-futurism: Us : Do something quick
SPY: 📉📈📉📈📉📈📉📈
[+12] u/pleasestoptalkin: So I enhanced my gf breasts with grok to show her what she would look like with gazongas and I’m the bad guy?
[+12] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: Good luck with that. I don't think they quite get how supply and demand gives 0 fucks about their cap.
[+11] u/Ill-Expression1737: **Journalist:** "You said the war is very complete. But your defense secretary says this is just the beginning. So which is it?"
**Trump:** "You could say both."
[+11] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won
---
/u/Deepradioo made a bet that NBIS would go to 106.0 within **1 week** when it was 94.74 and it did, congrats autist.
Their record is now 2 wins and 1 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+11] u/According-Page8618: if you bought s&p 500 in 2024 december as a europoor, youre still red, love the dollar decline
[+11] u/bigmeatbag: The owners should just put an Iranian flag on their tankers and go through the strait, easy problem solved.
[+11] u/Meme_Burner: I'm trying to figure something out.
On Sunday and Monday morning the market priced in Crude Oil at $100+ on fears that the Strait of Hormuz was closed and that no boats could pass through. Then the U.S. President said that the Strait was open, so oil prices went lower. Later we find out that the Strait is not open, nor will the U.S. navy escort vessels at this time, and as of yesterday no boat has passed through the Strait since Sunday. Now when a boat actually traverses the Strait it gets attacked, proving that the fear that was held on Sunday is real.
Price of oil hasn't budged or gotten back to the $100 and i'm the tard?
[+11] u/lessoninprogress: How is this bullshit market not in the fucking ground.
[+11] u/pineapplekiwipen: # BREAKING: PRESIDENT TRUMP TO TARIFF THREATS FROM IRAN WITH UP TO 100% IMPORT DUTIES
[+11] u/Feedthemcake: We’re going to get a false flag drone attack so mango can drop a nuke
[+11] u/neo-futurism: Let’s befriends BOLs and BERs, real enemy is the MM
[+11] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: Iran's President: Only way to end the war is recognising Iran's legitimate rights, payment of reparations and firm international guarantees against future aggression - post on X
Oh
[+11] u/Same-Brilliant2014: If there's one thing I know about radical Muslims is that after you kill their entire family and blow up their country, they always forgive and forget and move on. They never hold a grudge.
[+11] u/Sidney_Godsby: Holy shit, fucking do something
[+11] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: 🥭 saying massie will go down as the worst R congressman lol.
Doubt.
[+11] u/StrongDongKong: Just in: Straight of Hormuz renamed in Gay of Homos. SPY to 800
[+11] u/Happy-Champion1661: perfectly cooked as always
[+11] u/civillyRange: The shit CPI measures is wild, all month over month
Jewelry +7.0%
Children's shoes +2.8%
Women's clothes +2.9%
Bols gunna cost more money to get prettied up for the dumpster LMAO
[+11] u/orsomeshitidk: I used to smoke weed under the bleachers with Brent Crude. Nice guy but always greasy looking
[+11] u/Soft_Ladder_7894: i do not understand this market, there are so many bad news out there still pumping. WTF
[+11] u/yyn1999: "Vote Vance 2028 to end the war in Iran 🤡"
[+11] u/Ok-Age-263: Most irrational market in history
[+11] u/HonestScar7176: Why the fuck is Tesla up. They are a shit company that has declining sales every quarter.
[+11] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: Ohhhh I get it now. We can’t invade anyone for their solar.
[+11] u/Cav829: By the time anyone can write "bols/bers thought" your statement has become dated.
[+11] u/Pulled_Forward: 400 million barrels is a whole 20 days of what the strait normally supplies
Tick tock
[+11] u/COLU_BUS: “A tanker has been escorted through the strait” is the 2026 “vaccine progress is going well”
[+11] u/fan_of_hakiksexydays: Imagine thinking that having to release oil reserves is bullish, and not a symptom of things going to total shit.
[+11] u/saw-it: You know it's fucked when the market reacts more to a tweet than what is actually happening
[+11] u/LasyKuuga: Indian managers inability to hire someone non-Indian should be studied
[+11] u/DriftWoodBarrel: I'm just asking for a 10% gain every day. It's really not much
[+11] u/Uisce-beatha: Taco running out of lies and false narratives to spin and the market is sniffing it out. Expect more bravado and jerking himself off for being born into wealth this afternoon. Never trust an adult that throws temper tantrums when things don't go their way after putting in no effort because they are lazy, spoiled and low energy. Accepting responsibility for your actions is the cornerstone of maturity
[+11] u/Usedillusion7: Nothing makes 🥭 happier than discussing death and destruction.
[+11] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: He just loves to lie, dude has done it his whole life
[+11] u/Kirko_Cousins: $14.99 for a shitty Subway sandwich? $20 footlongs before the end of the decade.
How does anyone afford to live on the bottom side of the K economy?
[+11] u/zeusbox: I swear these algos reading tweets and news is gonna give us circuit breaker one of these days.
[+11] u/Fineous40: I wish my positions only went up in value.
[+11] u/SamBankman_Grilled: I wanna get choked like this Hormuz guy
[+11] u/MarginCuck: Imagine dying for is reel 🤣🇺🇸👎
[+11] u/tikimandude: "The Pentagon has barred press photographers from briefings who published supposedly "unflattering" photos of Pete Hegseth." -Washington Post
🥭's war is going swimmingly it seems
[+11] u/bpc12: I’m staying out of the market this week to sports gamble instead. You know it’s bad when I feel those odds are better 😂
[+11] u/Level_Counter3062: Remember when GLD went up almost everyday 1% for three months, those were good times
[+11] u/wafflepiezz: Fuck you MMs
The moment my $MU calls got anal fisted, it decides to pump and undo its entire dump
The moment I bought $LRCX calls, it barely moves
Fuck you MMs
[+11] u/MorningAlternative43: High volume… something is about to happen
[+11] u/harryburton420: going to be chop salad all day today
[+11] u/zeren1ty: No stopping oil this time, 🥭is out of excuse cards
[+11] u/2020isgreat: Spain is downgrading its diplomatic representation in Israel and will not return its ambassador to the country
EU cutting of relations with Israel we're about to see just how much leverage Israel has
[+11] u/_Netgirth: Damn does the new Ayatollah not follow 🥭 on truth social???
[+11] u/elvee61: Mental illness is a bar to being drafted. I think most of us in here are safe.
[+11] u/Same-Brilliant2014: Brent Crude: Maritime lawyer, coming this fall to Netflix
[+11] u/Ble_h: The retard in charge got us into a war and had no concepts of a plan when Iran didn’t surrender.
[+11] u/Ghost1914: I’m not trusting this pump
[+11] u/TokiAsuma: wtf even happened lmao
[+11] u/Rich-Badger-7601: BREAKING: IEA agrees to release 400 million uncooked lobbies to help address Old School Runescape's membership price increases
[+11] u/Street-Badger: Emergency release of one month’s worth of reserves is .. bullish? If you say so ..
[+11] u/General-Elk-6537: Just V back to 680 spy. So i can sell at a loss
[+11] u/Abe2025: Oracle: "thanks for the pump guys but I have to go back down to 0 again"
[+11] u/Key_Abroad7633: The market refusing to go down with all of this is actually insane
[+11] u/Skd98012: #Golly my wallet is THICC after I stopped burning money in the stock market
[+11] u/Retaining-Wall: This is actually beyond humour. This was the dumbest motherfuckingly stupid shit any US Prez has done. Fuckin 4 different previous prez said fuck no to this. And dicklock says yeah fuck it let's go.
[+11] u/orsomeshitidk: Mr Netanyahu I have located the new supreme leader of Iran, he just cut me off in a Chevy Avalanche with a “fuck it” sticker, then flipped me off..
Please deploy all available Israeli F35s to my location.
[+11] u/Far-Requirement9180: The market flatter than my ex chest
[+11] u/peterpeer9: Imagine wasteing your entire day watching a line move to the right
[+10] u/LarryStink: Everyone is so focused on Iran they are completely missing the real story.
The reason I got ber'd up 2 weeks before the war started. Private credit is cracking and fast. And its not just some small fry portfolio. The largest AUM funds are marking loans to 0. Limiting or disabling redemptions entirely. Blackstone had to cough up 450$ million with 150$ million pooled from executives own pockets to cover the gap from some ~2$ billion in redemption requests.
Credit spreads have materially rose since the end of January. The high yield spread is up 20% from the January lows, almost a 3 standard deviation move.
These kind of events only happen before something breaks. Slow at first and no one notices, than all at once. Its 2023 bank run vibes all over again, if not worse, 2007/08.
[+10] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: 36 mins to CPI please be bad. Like really bad and by bad I mean honest.
[+10] u/PutSpreadDaddi69: And the crowd goes mild
[+10] u/dontlikeyacutG: It’s gonna drop then climb the rest of the day, just like everyday. And I’m not gonna do a thing about it and complain later, probably Idk
[+10] u/Progessor: "Poots on the ground"
[+10] u/rocier: Every descision ive made this year has been incorrect
[+10] u/SmoothBrainSavant: why does it feel like the Iran/oil thing will play out more like frogs in a pot of water on the stove. slow creep up in the coming weeks/months until its a full blown energy crisis this summer?
[+10] u/WarmCan3034: the only reason why I am not playing puts is because there is always a 90% chance this shit will V to fuck me over :( so I will just do work today...
[+10] u/Tay_Tay86: Oil storage tanks in Omans biggest port are on fire - WSJ
[+10] u/jraiv420: 🥭 just said he's not finished bombing Iran
[+10] u/Lapidated_Llama: Anyone else have massive losses? I’m at 68.5k currently.
[+10] u/jda823: Come on in guys! The waters fine! Just ignore the missiles and mines and we are good. We pump this afternnon
[+10] u/HandsomeTod11: I think my wife is vibecoding. I hear vibration noises from the bedroom
[+10] u/Pitiful-Ad769: Efficient market my ass
[+10] u/GGYungNut: What if we hired the cartels to build tunnels and smuggle the oil out 🙊
[+10] u/OrionJohnson: Crazy how the market isn’t taking into account the simple fact that most of US GDP growth and the overwhelming majority of stock market growth over the past couple years is based on the AI bet. But this AI bet relies on cheap and readily available energy to run the data centers. What happens when energy is no longer cheap?
[+10] u/Several_Bread_9144: This time its joever for real
[+10] u/saintmitchy: Y’all remember the “Iran isn’t really going to close the Strait. It would be suicide!” analyst?
[+10] u/wright_on_: Claude, create a new strait of hormuz, but wider and far away from Iran. Make no mistakes.
[+10] u/Dynamic_Dreamer: I will turn my ROTH IRA to a tax sheltered option-wheeling playground. Thank you all for being such great influences.
[+10] u/Key_Abroad7633: Calls today is free money
[+10] u/mneymaker: NBIS on the big screeeeeen i am going to cryyyyyy <3
[+10] u/orsomeshitidk: WSB is great because people will be real mean and accuse your wife of having a boyfriend but if you trauma dump people are quick to be like hey bro sorry 😢
[+10] u/mks_csw: "Numbers have been perfectly cooked, just as i predicted lmao"
[+10] u/Coogiez: They changed the numbers
[+10] u/No-Consequence7985: they matched all 3 numbers? Gtfoh lmfao
[+10] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: **there is no amount of oil reserve volume that can reverse the immediate effects of all this news.**
[+10] u/LostandConfused2024: If you’re not swing trading these dips, i don’t know what the fuck to tell you lmao
[+10] u/sck178: It's my birthday and for my birthday I would like a circuit breaker. For the fun of it
[+10] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: > 🚨 BREAKING: US forces take out last of 4 Iranian Soleimani-class warships, CENTCOM Commander Adm Brad Cooper
Pump it! 700 here we come!
[+10] u/Beagle001: It's a good sign for the world when there's swings of several dollars in oil just while I'm making coffee. A month ago, that would be fucking crazy. Now I see it and just yawn and dig out another treat for the dog.
[+10] u/tika_dengu: Draft announcement after close
[+10] u/trainwreck001: COMING UP ON WEEK 3 OF OUR 4 WEEK WAR.
LOL.
OIL $300
[+10] u/confused_teabagger: >JUST IN: Israeli intelligence assessment indicates Iran’s new supreme leader was wounded at the start of the war
How is that when I saw that dude walking around and glad-handing everyone like 2 days ago? How am I supposed to make money on this questionable intelligence?
[+10] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Too many bulls. Will definitely dump
[+10] u/DX6734D: If I was Iran, I would just not be so invade-able. Are they stupid?
[+10] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: This shit is so fake and ghey
[+10] u/Skilledthunder: I swear to god if GOOG doesn't go green Im gonna make my own search engine! With blackjack! And Hookers
[+10] u/Sober_Alcoholic_: The amount of people here rushing to comment about their unrealized gains is hilarious. They’re gone in 2 minutes half the time.
[+10] u/gamersEmpire: Sleeping 4hrs everyday is healthy for the mind, gods plan for keeping me regarded 🙏
[+10] u/WSB-mods-are-: Me and the boys gearing up for the most badass surfing trip ever in the Hormuz summer group chat rn
[+10] u/Loud-Aioli-9465: strait of whore mooze lol
[+10] u/anonymouschelseafan: Be careful, these are the days that absolutely ruin traders
[+10] u/Retaining-Wall: Iranian drone strikes Oman's largest oil depot.
Oil war muthafuckas.
[+10] u/G_I_Joe_Mansueto: https://preview.redd.it/17p18n2itfog1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1aaf98409bf48d178219152d3dbfcf1e8f008cd1
The thing about ending a war is that the enemy gets a vote.
[+10] u/BrokeDickRizz: WEVE BEEN HERE FOR 5 FUCKING MONTHS
[+10] u/McKoijion: > The 1979 oil crisis, sometimes referred to as the second oil crisis (in reference to the 1973 oil crisis), refers to the drop in oil production in the aftermath of the Iranian Revolution that led to an energy crisis in 1979. Although the global oil supply only decreased by approximately four percent,[2] the oil markets' reaction raised the price of crude oil drastically over the next 12 months, more than doubling it to $39.50 per barrel ($248/m3). The sudden increase in price was connected with fuel shortages similar to the 1973 oil crisis.[3]
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1979_oil_crisis
[+10] u/McKoijion: Lmao, now Trump is trying to convince oil tankers that Iran *didn't* lay mines in the Strait so they'll risk sailing through.
[+10] u/highlanderquestion90: Lmao people in here with the attention span of a goldfish dont realize that the actual strait of hormuz is 1 mile long, and impassable until further notice
[+10] u/catfromgarfield: I just saw a leak that the USA has no plan for the future of Iran, or for reopening the strait of hormuz
[+10] u/awetfartruinedmylife: declare victory you piece of dog shit
[+10] u/thehacktivist1: Remember when the USA overthrew the democratically elected government of Iran in 1953 so they could install the brutal dictatorship of the Shah because they wanted their friends at British Petroleum to control the oil? I can't remember, how did that work out again?
[+10] u/freehouse_throwaway: vix at this level is honestly awesome for 0dte addicts/gamblers
every random news can cause the market to move bigly
[+10] u/unhappyreach_: Could the drones reach my overpriced, shitty one-bed apartment if launched from Mexico
I'm scared now :(
[+10] u/Wowmuchrya: Nobody is holding overnight 📉🛩️
[+10] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: Newsom will just create a tall wall of homeless crack addicts to block the attack "The crack dome"
[+10] u/kintarogolden: accidentally bombing an elementary school is insane
[+10] u/ThatFreakImHim: If dinosaurs fucked more we wouldn't be in this situation
[+10] u/br0botic: Fake pumps over the years:
~~”Vaccine development going well”~~
~~”Trade talks going well”~~
“War going well” <— you are here
[+10] u/Haunting-Window-5125: The market is actually regardedly bullish right now for moving sideways after all the shit Iran said today lol
[+10] u/Wide_Promotion8146: Just want a blonde girl to tell me how cute my shrek is
[+10] u/Erevoss: Imagine being bullish when you should be kangarooish
[+10] u/slightly_visibleRibs: everything is priced in SPY will never move out of range again
[+10] u/awetfartruinedmylife: pedonald needs to declare victory aka surrender asap, so SPY can go back to range trading 680-690
[+10] u/I_Sniff_Uranus: Fool me can’t get fooled again
[+10] u/Comfortable733: Believe it or not, 🅱️alls
[+10] u/jayyy929: $685 SPY 🚀 WE ROCKIN TODAY
[+10] u/Specialist_Fig9458: I was a ber before this war this is just a lil sweet treat
[+10] u/Acceptable_Bed_6033: It’s gonna pop at open then drop like a rock around 11
[+10] u/orsomeshitidk: Crazy that private islands gonna be associated with pedos for a generation or two lol
[+10] u/SmallCapsOnly: Anyone else notice North Korea has been exceptionally quiet lately…. Too quiet 🤔 🤨
[+10] u/pittoftheshits: how long does it take for oil to go bad? Are the tankers refrigerated?
[+10] u/ValueOfADollar: aaaand it’s red and I’m trapped
[+10] u/Fineous40: Just now people outside my office were talking about shorting oil…… this shit going 200+
[+10] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: Most obvious V maybe the biggest the world has ever seen
[+10] u/ChampagnePapi-: Now watch this drive 🏌️
[+10] u/Brilliant_Object_847: Has there been a statement from the Board of Peace yet?
[+10] u/No_Tough_2065: 🥭 not helping this V at all 😬
[+10] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: 50 billion dollars spent on a younger more handsome ayatollah who's family we just killed this is 5D chess for peace and liberation
[+10] u/Ok_Persimmon9849: Volume on USO is over 3x the average and volume on the S&P is more than 3x under the average lol
[+10] u/SaveTheAles: Lifted truck owners in ruins. Weekend trips to Costco are cancelled until the strait is open.
[+10] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: You’ve never experienced rage until you’ve traded 0-1 day contracts on a theta day
[+10] u/unwanted_hair: *Trades on headlines and does zero research.*
"This market is fake and gay!"
[+10] u/Rich-Badger-7601: Can oil just hit $120 a barrel again I want to feel superior to the lowland poors when I walk to work in my urban oasis
[+10] u/BallsHardest: I'm starting to think the NBA is rigged.
[+10] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: CALIFORNIA FALSE FLAG.
[+10] u/ShutterYT: Fuck u Orange Prick when will u leave fuckin everything up
[+10] u/enc-nyc: This shit is untradable
[+10] u/sloanemonroe: Wouldn’t that be cool if the market was just regular buyers and sellers and not market makers trying to fuck everybody over all the time?
[+10] u/OsamaBagHolding: White smoke has been seen in Tel Avive, a new Epstien has been chosen!
[+10] u/Sick0h: 🥭 gonna announce he spoke with sonatollah and that all is gucci and we rip. Of course 2 hours later 🇮🇷 will deny this. But that isn’t what matters here. Hold your calls.
[+10] u/dub_soda: Closing at opening price is the ultimate goal and they will obliterate the order book to get there
[+10] u/DriftWoodBarrel: Why Congress allows Trump to get away with this shit is only because they are a bunch of Israeli shills. I don't like the Iranian regime either, but I'm not looking for an excuse to blow shit up and expect it to work out. Israel knows this conflict is going to last for a while, they don't care because they're crazy. They get to play Trump like usual. Congress on the bankroll like usual. All of the crazies and cowards are happy.
[+9] u/6PercentOfTheTime: Squawk box can lick my taint
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: I love how retards always say something is priced in or that the market is forward looking like it isn’t 50% vibes and 50% institutional douches trying to fuck over retail
[+9] u/guzzledglizzy: Theta bulls creaming their pant
[+9] u/ComfortablePiglet842: Gonna be one of those days where you buy puts and watch the market burn 🔥
[+9] u/cashflow_: ATTENTION ALL
I HAVE NOT RECEIVED A SINGLE MENTION OR TAG ALL MORNING. AS SUCH I AM OBVIOUSLY NOT IMPORTANT TO ANY OF YOU
THEREFORE I AM ANNOUNCING THIS MORNING THAT I WILL NEVER POST HERE AGAIN
GOOD LUCK FINDING ANOTHER GIRL BETTER THAN ME YOU CANT YOU BLEW IT. BYE THEN
THIS HAS BEEN AN OFFICIALLY SANCTIONED AND APPROVED CASHFLOW FINAL UPDATE
[+9] u/CPR123_: Wait so why would the Energy Sec lie about a ship being escorted?? Hmm… 🤔
[+9] u/thai_sticky: No overnight footage from middle east on combat footage. I suspect a cover up
[+9] u/puffinnbluffin: You know the rug is coming
[+9] u/crossdefaults: Schoolgirls bombed: bummer.
Oil is up: EVERYBODY PANIC!
[+9] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: JP Morgan saying that we were about to continue with a bull trend was probably the signal that the top is in guys
[+9] u/dudetrustm3: You see that top where it bounced and acted as resistance? It’s where I bought
[+9] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: Vix still being this high is bullshit since they are keeping it ranged like this
[+9] u/Star_Lord924: Today...somethinf really finally sunk in. This market as a whole is so fuckin corrupt and rigged to fuck each and every one of us. In some way shape or form. You might win some days. But ultimately they have ALL the power. Fuck this piece of shit market on every level. When a certain hour clicks and all of a sudden actual movement happens. Certain little nuances through the day. Its absolute bullshit fuck everything avout today.
[+9] u/Powerful_Mission_655: Holding these puts to profit or zero
[+9] u/ecoburner87: You can see the moment this morning when Bessent woke up to turn on the gas price suppression algorithm
[+9] u/frogboyjr: so obvious who bought oil at $120
[+9] u/2020isgreat: ISRAEL ASSESSES THAT TRUMP NOT CLOSE TO INSTRUCTING END TO WAR - TWO ISRAELI OFFICIALS[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2031699496984252722)
[+9] u/d33p7r0ubl3: Pajama traders can't make up their damn minds
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: Yall ever get this feeling where everything just seems so performative and you can’t find any media you want to consume
[+9] u/dontlikeyacutG: And the crowd goes mild
[+9] u/borkdpasito: Log off Bols - it’s an oily day
[+9] u/Perfectly_Splendid89: \-what should we type for cpi numbers?
\-idk, just cook something where they lose all their money in the market whether they have puts or calls
\-Say no more fam.
[+9] u/PositiveToe2761: “Guys the war is deescalating and although cpi is up it met expectations were fine” … AND ITS PRIVATE CREDIT FROM THE TOP ROPE
[+9] u/Emilio___Molestevez: if you're waiting for some made-up target price to buy at, buy 10% above it and strengthen your hands if the stock drops
[+9] u/trainwreck001: 5 TANKERS HIT IN THE STRAITS IN PAST 24 HOURS.
OIL $300
[+9] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Selling my 1 share to help the bers
[+9] u/Abe2025: Im shorting as soon as it pumps a little at open
[+9] u/sarcago: SPY negative ytd lol
[+9] u/Val44x: So confirmed ships are being struck in the Strait now and we still haven’t given up the gains from the last 2 days that were based off of US saying we are all good 👍
[+9] u/Initial_Ad_9250: Pump will continue until the bers improve their attitude.
[+9] u/browsk: What are you guys gonna do when you get drafted to fight for Israel?
[+9] u/cannythecat: Why do tweets control the whole market now. Earnings don't matter its just good headline tweet or bad headline tweet.
[+9] u/baconography: BREAKING: Israel, the U.S, and Iran agree to keep bombing gold miner stocks.
[+9] u/Uisce-beatha: Lol, can't believe WS still falls for this dudes bullshit. Is the entire market run by shortsighted reactionary adderall addicted twenty somethings?
[+9] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: Yesterday - Don 🌮declares war is pretty much over, market pumps. Turns out it was not true we dump towards the end of the day
Today - Don 🌮declares war is pretty much over. Market pumps.
We really going to do this same song and dance again? The MMs who run these algos are more retarded than the guy who bought NVDA 120 puts for July.
[+9] u/DelphiTsar: Oil up 37% since a month ago. Worst job numbers since Covid. Private credit hitting circuit breakers. GAAP updates inflating paper profits through unrealized capital gains in the AI bubble.
Believe it or not, all time highs.
[+9] u/TheMightySet69: Mango: "Nothing left to target"
15 minutes later...
US and Israeli officials: "We're warring for two more weeks! Yeehaw!"
[+9] u/Irishbros1991: https://www.reuters.com/world/middle-east/oil-storage-facilities-hit-omans-salalah-port-ambrey-state-tv-say-2026-03-11/
Looks like Iran does not agree with ending the war Oil is going to go brrrrrrr again.
[+9] u/weewoowewoooo: The best thing you can do is just not play in this dog shit market lmfao
[+9] u/UnivalveX: he bought? pump the fucking shit out of it
[+9] u/jraiv420: Own 10 shares of USO feel like a oil baron
[+9] u/dont_downvote_SPECIL: #MU & SNDK GANG CHECKING IN 🤝🫂👯♂️👯♀️👯
[+9] u/sloanemonroe: oil up despite the reserve release and everyone’s OK with this? Nobody’s concerned what will happen tomorrow or next week? It’s kind of unbelievable.
[+9] u/East-Resolution4446: Don’t do 0DTEs today
[+9] u/Liability049-6319: Apple released a budget laptop today. Clearest recession indicator
[+9] u/KehreAzerith: Department of war: "Spy tried to sail the the straight of hormuz and hit an Iranian mine, casualties reported"
[+9] u/Gom_KBull: # Just found out mango appointed [Erika Kirk as advisor to Air Force leadership](https://gazette.com/2026/03/09/trump-appoints-erika-kirk-to-air-force-academy-board/).
# Our [timeline](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2TXY6SNuD4)...
[+9] u/Critical_Survey_975: Being down 40% on my Msft calls is normal to me now
[+9] u/popstockndropit: Need SPY to hit 700 in the next 10 minutes or I'll lose my house
[+9] u/trainwreck001: WALL STREET IN SHOCK AND DENIAL THAT OIL IS REALLY GOING TO $200. LOL
OIL $300
[+9] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: Hey moderator squeeze my nutz
[+9] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BESSENT should be impeached for his tweet yesterday.
[+9] u/LongroddMcHugendong: Israel is literally never going to stop. They turned Gaza into a pile of rocks, now they’re going to do the same to Lebanon and Iran
[+9] u/I_Own_A_Fedora_AMA: Hey guys crazy thought maybe this whole new war in the Middle East thing won’t be super quick and super easy call me crazy I know it’s an edge case but have we considered the possibility is all I’m asking
[+9] u/Me-Regarded: My little mom/pop client just asked if their new brochure website will have AI. This is the top boys
[+9] u/solidsneeze: it's been 5 minutes, about time for a crazy headline again
[+9] u/oldsguy65: ~~Ha ha. Get rekt, ghey bers.~~
~~Ha ha. Ger rekt, ghey bols.~~
~~Ha ha. Get rekt, ghey bers.~~
~~Ha ha. Ger rekt, ghey bols.~~
~~Ha ha. Get rekt, ghey bers.~~
Ha ha. Ger rekt, ghey bols.
[+9] u/OsamaBagHolding: Boss now just sends me his GPT conversations 'Do this.'
This... this is my life now until the bread lines...
[+9] u/CMac681: I ain’t askin for the world here
Just an eight ball and 2 million dollars
[+9] u/Usedillusion7: It almost seems like the debt is only talked about and only an issue when a certain party is in the white house. Funny how it's never even discussed anymore.
[+9] u/Agitated-Lobster-623: Ah yes the falling down the stairs and bouncing off of each individual stair pattern
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: We've backstabbed them twice in a year and bombed them while negotiating. They have zero reason to negotiate with us continuing to act in bad faith. War of choice v war for existence
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: The global order is crumbling and bulls are jorking peenr for $700
[+9] u/ten7four: Why would biden do this?
[+9] u/ebitdasga: Why was everything rocketing this morning anyways?
[+9] u/Icommandyou: Kind of funny almost every asset other than tech has stopped pricing in current events
[+9] u/zeren1ty: Imagine oil breaks 100 again in the next week after all the headline “tricks” have been used already to hammer it
Proper chaos
[+9] u/Emilio___Molestevez: 8,000 miles from Tehran to California btw
[+9] u/CoinKedo: *IDF DETECTS LAUNCH OF MISSILES FROM IRAN, WORKING TO INTERCEPT
Targeting California
[+9] u/AppleJuiceTwo: There’s no way this doesn’t go lower
[+9] u/KMS_Tirpitz: Iran doesn't seem to be capable of hitting the west coast, might be an inside job from the orange man to strike Cali to own the libs
[+9] u/Emergency-Ticket5859: No offense Zionists/Trump but I'd choose stable oil supply over your little expedition here
[+9] u/Star_Lord924: Not a single fuckkng green candle can sustain. This is the biggest horse shit on SPY. Absolutely unbelievable.
[+9] u/radishr: 400 million barrels of crude on the wall,
400 million barrels of crude,
Take one off, pass it around,
399,999,999 barrels of crude on the wall 🎶
[+9] u/svpa3991: 🥭: “all yall get some new tariffs”
Also 🥭: “crazy.. I expected more of our supposed allies. No one has come to our aid in Iran so far”
[+9] u/Val44x: “We will fight this war as long as we need to and send in boots on the ground if necessary”
Spy opens 499
I like writing erotic BER fanfiction
[+9] u/jagaddjag: Circus closing in 30 mins. This shit is not moving
[+9] u/mankey21: 🎺 Digi-mon, digital monsters, Digi-mon are the CHAMPIONS! 🎺
[+9] u/_bigmeatyklaws: I was promised this pump 3000 years ago
[+9] u/UnivalveX: wish I was as half as resilient in life as SPY
[+9] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: The Department of Energy is warning that gas prices aren’t likely to come back down to pre-war levels until mid-2027 at the earliest.
[+9] u/Less_Spare_6970: Fk sold my spy puts 1 min before close and it jumped 20% after hours
[+9] u/Simple_Jach: The spice must flow.
[+9] u/Agitated-Lobster-623: Calls. Always bet on American hubris and arrogance. Are things good? No. Will they get worse? Much. But remember who else is investing. Americans and they are very very dumb
[+9] u/Rare-ish_Birb: Did ya ever wonder how diffferent life would be if humans photosynthesized....instead of eating/p👀ping?
Also: ORCL 160p 04/02
[+9] u/Key_Journalist_36982: So yesterday some bozo at depart energy posted that one ship had made it throught the straight, which was factually incorrect, and oil prices dropped.
But now when the IEA says its going to release from its reserves the biggest amount of oil in its history. What happens to the price of oil? Absolutely fucking nothing. In fact its gone up since that announcement. wtf
[+9] u/delicious_oppai: This gonna dump at open
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: $3.09/gal for regular in Oklahoma. That means $5+ in California surely. If gas gets above $5 here I’m refusing to drive into the office. You think I’m paying European prices without European vacation time? Hell no.
[+9] u/ToughVegetable2483: This setup is gonna be chop until something happens then drop
[+9] u/CUbuffGuy: Dancin' time at 10:30am bers, don't be late.
[+9] u/BarnacleBillsBum: Gotta say, I'm grateful for all of y'all making me feel sane. I read NY Times headlines like "the White House reports Trump spoke the Iranian mines out of existence," and I'm thinking "I don't think you can do that." You group of weirdos are the only ones saying "yea it's bullshit."
[+9] u/adwise27: Will releasing the Oil reserves make Iran dig their heels in deeper knowing there is a ticking time bomb of oil supply? We are going to have to send troops in to figure this shit out in the next 10 days or we might actually have a real crisis lol
[+9] u/Advanced_Structure21: The market is healthier if we have to release SPR? Isn't that a bit like my financial health is higher if I have to dip into my long term savings?
[+9] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Can I ever do anything right
[+9] u/delicious_oppai: Too much shit talking from bols this morning 🤣😂
[+9] u/anonymouschelseafan: What’s funny is that this would be the worst period in modern history to introduce someone to daytrade in haha
[+9] u/saw-it: Just pick a direction
[+9] u/Neat-Concentrate-239: Omfg I'm a bear and I made money
Bulls mad asf rn
[+9] u/HonestScar7176: Just fucking dump already. What regards are buying the dip.
[+9] u/ConstantEfficiency83: 100k for an account manager job with little oversight and complete freedom, or 130k for a plant controller job where you’re stuck in the office all day?
[+9] u/tika_dengu: Wendy’s doing a W
https://preview.redd.it/mtjx54u00gog1.jpeg?width=403&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f8d5da4f39a22fe434a2eb79a1d3d2b8646ad5c1
[+9] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Last two Mondays futes opened up -2.5% and climbed to green. This upcoming Monday they will open up at -2.5% and dump to -3.5% by end of the day
[+9] u/Bam2458: It’s amazing the problems we still create for ourselves as a civilization.
[+9] u/whydouhatemecablegod: these violent delights have violent ends
[+9] u/Liability049-6319: Ironically, releasing the oil reserves means this war is far from over... If anyone thought this conflict was ending soon, the oil wouldn't be released.
[+9] u/snspro: SUK MY GREEEEN DONG BERS
[+9] u/AirportMaterial5917: depend plate advise tan observation fanatical subtract theory angle history
[+9] u/Fickle-Necessary-438: WHO'S HAVING A GOOD TIME, RAISE YOUR HANDS
[+9] u/cannythecat: Market doesn't realize how serious this is. They float the idea of escorting ships to pump the market but it hasn't actually happened because they can't. The US navy would be exposed to attacks by suicide boats and if they lose one ship it would cause full blown panic. The navy is sitting a safe distance away.
[+9] u/LostandConfused2024: Locked in 2k profit today. TIME TO BALL
[+9] u/Far-Requirement9180: The best investment is to quit trading and go back to Wendy’s workforce
[+9] u/Axwe8: # YALL EVER PLAYED MINESWEEPER? THIS IS IRL MINESWEEPER 🤡🤣
[+9] u/Appropriate_Ice_7507: God damn piece of shit fuck you you massive gey fucking piece of shit motherfucker…fuck! Just sold my 170c orcl as a massive loss. Fuck you piece of shit…fuck!!!
[+9] u/Tyneuku: Watched a line all day and got sadder, my ancestors much be funing
[+9] u/BobsBurners420: 🤡 market propped up by a 🤡 government
[+9] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BESSENT to 🥭 : don’t worry kitten. rawr XD
[+9] u/Coogiez: when im long this shit never Vs... when im short it Vs IMMEDIATELY LOL
[+9] u/Sea_Blacksmith_1862: It’s not gonna pump is it??
[+9] u/G0RD0N_CLARK: Are you not becoming poor fast enough already?
[+9] u/Acceptable_Bed_6033: Puts are free fucking money lmao
[+9] u/PushAble2463: Motherfuckers sending drones at my boy Oman 😠
[+9] u/TheGeoGod: It will take months to clear the mines. Put option time!
[+9] u/Valkorion335786: Holy shit what a terrible day lol
[+9] u/Wendyhighland: I think my anus can meet global demand
[+8] u/Upset-Motor-2602: Love seeing people whistling past the ORCL graveyard. That company is doomed. Take advantage of this pump and sell.
[+8] u/SocraticGoats: I put an AIS on a shark that's swimming around in the strait, and it's driving the Iranians crazy.
[+8] u/mayorolivia: Market due for 3rd straight green day since Khamanei Jr took over. Coincidence? I think not
[+8] u/One_Impression_2253: don’t forget. the more bad headlines, the more we go up
[+8] u/jonneh: > **The Economist**
>
> The closure of Hormuz is the most sudden shock to global supply in the history of petroleum. Last year some 14m barrels per day (b/d) of crude, equivalent to 14% of world output, plus another 4m b/d of refined oil products sailed the waterway. A fraction can be redirected via pipelines in Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates (UAE), but that still leaves around 15m b/d of oil and products trapped in the Persian Gulf.
>
> IEA members’ combined emergency stocks number some 1.2bn barrels. Governments can requisition another 600m barrels of industry inventory. All this is enough to cover 140 days of their total net imports. There have been five collective releases since the IEA’s creation, including two in 2022 to counter the shock caused by the war in Ukraine.
>
> Short of ending the war, then, the best-case scenario of realistic reserve releases, more Russian crude and a bit more American shale gives just over 4m b/d. This is less than a third of the Hormuz shortfall and would take weeks to materialise. In the meantime, more Gulf producers will run out of space to store their stranded oil. Iraq and Kuwait are already shutting in wells; the UAE and Saudi Arabia are reportedly trimming production. Within three weeks combined cuts could approach 10m b/d—roughly 10% of global output.
[+8] u/outhinking: Iran saying continuous strikes from now on
[+8] u/Unemployable1593: Imminent financial collapse is no reason to skip leg day
also drink water
[+8] u/Trader0721: A vessel got attacked…..yea…you aren’t panicking enough
[+8] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: IEA releasing oil reserves just give Iran more leverage lmao. They just need to keep threatening the SoH a little longer til short term storage of oil runs out and suddenly there’s a global shortage of oil that would take months to rebuild.
[+8] u/Apple2o: I’m ready to take a shit and make someone’s entire year, let’s fucking go. Open the fucking casino
[+8] u/siouxu: Bool extra gassy this morning. Maybe something bool eat? Should not eat bools own poop. Very concern for bool.
[+8] u/---Right--Tackle---: #We are gonna be range bound literally forever
[+8] u/eoiioe: Got to give it to the top 1% of the economy; literally keeping the whole economy going whilst the rest are debating whether they can afford to drive their car to work lol
[+8] u/nadoterisback: >GOLDMAN WARNS OF POTENTIAL ‘EXTREME’ STOCK RALLY
[+8] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Rug the bools make them the exit liquidity
[+8] u/MaxVerstudpen: Wish CPI was higher, we'd be +5% already
[+8] u/yyn1999: Pure Manipulation insane
[+8] u/WillasTyrell: they’re not taking this seriously enough, the war needs to end asap, it’s not just about oil it’s about jet fuel, there’s entire industries that will go under if this keeps up
[+8] u/motorcycle-emptiness: Man what is even happening anymore.
[+8] u/killainvest: So is that a no on the 2k Tariff check?
[+8] u/ThinkingOfTheOldDays: A concept of a portfolio
👈👉
[+8] u/Fernyfern7: I declare bankruptcy!
[+8] u/AppleJuiceTwo: Low volume pump means high volume dump
[+8] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Oman oil storage facilities on fire
[+8] u/ilwb: Wtf did West coast do to you go hit the east coast iran
[+8] u/IRunFast24: I live in California. An Iranian drone would be cool a souvenir if I can snag one.
[+8] u/Maximum_Light409: dopamine cortisol dopamine cortisol dopamine cortisol
wish i were a potato
[+8] u/jnas_19: U.S. STATE DEPT: IRAN AND IRAN-ALIGNED TERRORIST MILITIAS MAY BE PLANNING TO TARGET U.S.-OWNED OIL AND ENERGY INFRASTRUCTURE IN IRAQ
[+8] u/VincenteThomp: Yeah… we’re definitely getting false flagged so that the government can justify troops on the ground.
[+8] u/MDdriver22: Why wont this freaking mkt dropp?
[+8] u/Acceptable_Bed_6033: Market is about price in boots on the ground.
[+8] u/Ornery_Intern_2084: DJT : " He said he did not believe Iran had mined the Strait of Hormuz, the world’s most sensitive choke point for oil shipments. Chubb will serve as lead underwriter for a U.S.-government-led program to provide insurance to ships passing through the strait. "
I wonder who wants to be a guinea pig
[+8] u/proenzaskooler: crazy level of retardation to buy/sell on what orange man says about oil instead of what is factually happening
[+8] u/fruitloop00001: It's not sour hour, it's not power hour. What is it? Dour hour?
[+8] u/vandammes: MARKET MAKERS ARE GONNA FUCK YOUR NBIS STOCK AND CALLS AFTER MARKET SO HARD THAT YOU WISHED THEY USED LUBE. MARK THESE WORDS! LMFAO
[+8] u/dub_soda: No buyers and relentless dip buying algos will keep us here longer than you ever thought possible
[+8] u/cannythecat: Short interest on TQQQ building. Is a rug pull coming
[+8] u/Extension_Dog_8511: Generational ORCL bagholders are being created today
[+8] u/astromouse2024: I’ve lost out on options many times
Nothing infuriates me more than not having buying power until AFTER the move down already happened, and by the time I have BP the market is back up
[+8] u/BagHoldersOfAmerica: Is there any watch dog agency that gets to look at the same set of data and verify the government's findings on CPI and PPI. I mean in the age of AI and big data I don't see why I wouldn't be easy to cross examine for BS
[+8] u/ScucciMane: I love waking up to the visible stress hormones in here
[+8] u/somewhere_cool: Reminder that today's cooked CPI numbers are pre-war and will be paraded heavily by 🥭
[+8] u/JuggernautFront1190: I have 70k how can I make 30k today?
[+8] u/swflcape: USA Today in the 90’s provided better war coverage than what the algo bros let us see these days. The wool hath been pulled.
[+8] u/SoloOutdoor: Put the tip in, take the tip out. Put the tip back in, take it back out.
Thats this market
[+8] u/looool_k_libtard: Spy is easily falling 4-9% today. No bottom until spy is under $300
[+8] u/Deadsea3132: when ur a bag holder and RH shows you a massive green dildo for one of ur bags yet it’s just a $0.01 pump
[+8] u/brute-forced: So AI is going to kill 100% of entry level white collar jobs, that means that if you have kids that are not already employed that their future is totally fucked.
At what point is this treated as a threat to our society
[+8] u/chiswis: why do tankers need to pass via gay of hormuz?
just go directly to murica on the other direction
problem solved
[+8] u/PositiveToe2761: Why would the Iran put its country right in the middle of our military bases?
[+8] u/mneymaker: NBIS gang if we get passed those geopolitics drama THE ROAD TO 140 IS CLEAR APRIL INCOMING
[+8] u/LarryStink: > IRAN THREATENS OIL BLOCKADE IN STRAIT OF HORMUZ
> “We will not allow even a single liter of oil to pass through the Strait of Hormuz for the benefit of the US, the Zionist regime or their partners.”
[+8] u/mneymaker: NO INFLATION LFG BOYS LOOK AT DEM BEARS AND IREN FANBOYZ
[+8] u/AirwickS: Ayatollah Jr. digging in.
This isn’t even close to being over.
[+8] u/darth_scion: Believe it or not. It wasn't calls.
[+8] u/darth_scion: OPEN THE MARKET YOU COWARDS
[+8] u/Anchises1: I'm going to masturbate right now before the market opens to take the edge off
[+8] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Stimulus checks and ppp loans were the biggest mistakes in the past 20 years. Well that and 🥭
[+8] u/Retaining-Wall: Your mum's got moass.
[+8] u/dasboot523: It's great that Tesla is an EV company again now that it's favorable
[+8] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Puts already priced for a dump lmao. That’s how predictable this market has become
[+8] u/ideletedmyaccount04: You got a better shot at winning Powerball than buying a TSLA put.
[+8] u/Heineken_500ml: My god what a shit show
[+8] u/humanoideric: TSLA just stays valued like it sells every car on the planet lol
[+8] u/PositiveEdge4361: I just wanna go back to my own ATH
[+8] u/adwise27: Why dont they just put a small mosque on each of the oil tankers? Would they blow up a mosque?!
[+8] u/weewoowewoooo: Don’t you just love a market that hasn’t gone anywhere in almost 5 months? Lmfaooo
[+8] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: Starting getting a legit dump and the instant V.
Bulls had the majority of the past two days. Bears had like 15 minutes each day. Guess it’s theta gangs turn today
[+8] u/Flat-Focus7966: This is gonna pump....
[+8] u/skarfbeaulonee: It's a bird!!! It's a plane!!! It's a market stuck in a range that's never going anywhere!!!
[+8] u/awetfartruinedmylife: I think I made a high-risk low-reward play
[+8] u/ChampagnePapi-: im actually a mine warfare expert too
[+8] u/mandoslambo: Mango has torpedoed cheap gas
What a retard
[+8] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: I am having one of those, I can't believe I traded so poorly today days.
[+8] u/ResidentPack4103: Oh look its the old dip before the rip
[+8] u/OsamaBagHolding: CPI just turned in last months homework, expecting no one to notice
[+8] u/Avocadonot: Options are way too fucking expensive rn
[+8] u/cryptohorn: Haha oil going up on the release news
[+8] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Iran is loading up on puts, then they will start going sicko mode and sink anything and everything that passes by
[+8] u/mikehoochie1234: I was up $750 at one point today… 🙂
I am now down $700
[+8] u/KayA93x: What time does 🥭 speak?
[+8] u/hermeskino715: Cmon bols. I bolieve in you
[+8] u/bennyblancobb: Man revenge trading today is advanced autism I swear doctors don’t have do diagnose me
[+8] u/Long_duk_dong_duck: Oil is about to absolutely rip
[+8] u/moorhound: Anyone who thinks Israels gonna let 🥭 🌮 out of this one; look up who Meir Kahane and Baruch Goldstein are, and how the current far-right in power in Israel feel about them.
These guys are literally just looking to fuck shit up, there *is no plan*.
[+8] u/oldsguy65: I thought the war was very complete a few days ago?
[+8] u/_TheGoogz: Campbell's trading at the same level it was at in 1997, so things seem to be going well for them.
I thought everyone was supposed to be broke and living off canned soup rn?
[+8] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Ill hold my puts to 0 if i need to
[+8] u/svpa3991: Sideways until one of these lies gets exposed
[+8] u/Bfisho: What was that a drop for ants
[+8] u/colinr813: So a direct threat to the United States and markets don’t even flinch?
Calls I guess
[+8] u/Icommandyou: The oil thing is actually crazy, what even happens when the reality hits all the economies lmao
[+8] u/Sick0h: 🇮🇷 wants to attack America? Omg the market should totally freak out like that threat hasn’t been present for longer than most of us here have been alive.
[+8] u/Emilio___Molestevez: "counting or not counting drone violence?"
[+8] u/Usedillusion7: Still running the numbers but it's looking like if you sell at -50% loss you will have more money than if you hold it to zero. Calculation isn't final yet but I will update as soon as it is.
[+8] u/Dependent-Media-1857: us invade country -> up
us soldiers died -> down
mango fake tweet war ended -> up
found out mango lied -> down
we got resources from war -> up
resources cut off -> down
rinse and repeat for all 194 countries
[+8] u/Remarkable_Owl: This market is living on borrowed time.
[+8] u/Any-Background2739: you know its a shit market day when even a degen gambler like me doesnt buy anything
[+8] u/Zimoula: Classic pump at 3 o clock to 680 like nothing burger
[+8] u/hermeskino715: 🥭: They aren't mining anything
🥭: We took down 28 mine ships
[+8] u/HandsomeTod11: The year is 2031. SPY is at 697 trading sideways, Corn has dumped, Rubio runs the US from a food truck in Havana and you are all still poor
[+8] u/callsonreddit: Cash overnight i think idk
[+8] u/Ok_Dish1650: Why tf is 🥭 speaking everyday
[+8] u/Beazt11123: Today was very not cash money imo
[+8] u/CasherburyTales: Problems solved. I found 1 billion barrels of oil in a field near my house
[+8] u/moazzam0: ''When small men begin to cast big shadows, it means that the sun is about to set.' - Lin Yutang
[+8] u/2020isgreat: ayyyy what'd I say EU COMMISSION SPOKESPERSON: WE ARE EXPLORING SUBSIDISING OR CAPPING THE GAS PRICE
[+8] u/AirportMaterial5917: middle grandiose expansion pet station ring fly cow steer shocking
[+8] u/mneymaker: HAHHAHAHAHAH BEARS THOUGHT
[+8] u/hermeskino715: This is what cooked numbers are supposed to look like
[+8] u/KomradeKruschenko: All of this only for Iran to bomb some ship, Trump to deploy troops and we go to 650
[+8] u/burnerAccountDuh24: Where is the fucking volume holy shit
[+8] u/Tay_Tay86: This guy on Bloomberg is laughing at the IEA.
400 million barrels but their distribution rate is 2 million a day. Yet the strait loses 20 million a day.
Also mentions that this could create a hoarding situation that could increase demand by 3 million barrels a day.
LMAO. He says they can't do anything to stop the price of oil
[+8] u/unhappyreach_: I picked a hell of a day to switch to Tylenol Soft Chews
[+8] u/zlordbeats: first cpi that didn’t result in pump in like a year
**time for bers to come out of hibernation for a few days**
[+8] u/outhinking: Oil is gonna become as scarce as gold
[+8] u/swenau01: I'm fine with all pumps except fraud tsla
[+8] u/Little_Top3815: I am done with this retarded mangoland market
[+8] u/Neat-Concentrate-239: I like my algos how I like my women
Completely fkn regarded
[+8] u/---Right--Tackle---: #VIX: 25+, massive implied volatility
#SPY: i sleep 😴
[+8] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: TRUMP: I THINK OIL COMPANIES SHOULD USE STRAIT OF HORMUZ
[+8] u/AndItsThetaAgain: If you’re feeling bullish on this little pop
I’m sorry for what’s about to happen
[+8] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+8] u/Valkorion335786: Texans laughing uncontrollably at the possibility of California getting attacked
[+8] u/Independent-Tree-985: All this oil stuff is a reminder that if only we had developed some sort of alternative power source
[+8] u/SaveTheAles: On the next map can we not put all the resources in the middle east?
[+8] u/FuckleUp: Iran 🇮🇷 drones in CA targeting polling stations 🇺🇸 cancelling elections
[+8] u/Comfortable733: My port just hit a mine 😡
[+8] u/CDulst: Iran is being the supreme oil bol, but ultimately gey ber rn.
[+8] u/Irishbros1991: Iran said Hold my beer we will make it $200 a barrel!
History lessons in the Future let's remember when Iran was able to make the World stop driving and flying in 2026 LMAO
[+8] u/rebel-capitalist: Why stock market is so fake?
[+8] u/ziggs_ulted_japan: Practically nothing left to target in Iran? What does that mean? They still have the strait closed.
[+8] u/Lil-PussyFart: Sold my 3/27 HIMS calls for 200% on Monday. They’d be 1300% right now. RIP.
[+8] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: I've got 1500 barrels of crude on pallets in my backyard
[+8] u/sierratangocharlie: surely the next tweet will fix this
[+8] u/Sea_Trip_8941: Remember when mango said the ships needs to have balls and just go through the straight of Hormuz? Do you think he cares about the people on the ships
[+8] u/yyn1999: "VOTE VANCE 2028 TO END THE WAR IN IRAN" 🤡
[+8] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Buying grossly OTM puts seems like better investment strategy than calls these days.
[+8] u/SouthNice7324: Bulls and bears getting shafted today
[+8] u/housemouse431: yall might see the greatest selling tonight and into tomorrow of our lifetimes.
[+8] u/Wonderful-Tomato-829: New brainwashing update from the department of thought. War, price inflation, and mass layoffs are now good. Please clap for supreme leader donald now.
[+8] u/moorhound: Hopefully at the end of all of this the whole Western world learns a lesson about letting the far-right crazies take over. It *universally* goes to shit every time
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: # "Bull" is just retardspeak for Bagholder
# ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭
[+8] u/2c-b_day: I was today years old when I learned that gluing a penny to the pavement is anti semitic 🤓
[+8] u/WarmCan3034: Can’t even poop and wipe my ass without losing $300
[+8] u/Rvin16: Iran will return in Avengers Doomsday
[+8] u/Valkorion335786: *"United States, everything sunny, all the time, always. Good time, beach party."*\- Supreme Leader 🥭, General Secretary of the Orange Party
[+8] u/LarsTarkas: I demand reparations from theta
[+8] u/orsomeshitidk: Currently peeling the little panties off a reeces peanut butter cup
[+8] u/tasskaff9: I think this was a setup so Trump can add Iran to the wars he stopped.
[+8] u/orsomeshitidk: It’s a bummer to have to get up and worry about work and bills and shit knowing the plan is to replace us with AI asap anyway. At least that will free more of us up to be deployed to Iran or Cuba or Venezuela or Greenland
[+8] u/Trashpanda7193: You know oracle is totally going to give up its gains
[+8] u/Unhappy_Hedgehog_808: of course I sold covered calls on NBIS yesterday
[+8] u/Critical_Survey_975: Wayyyyyyyy to bearish in here, easy +3% day for no reason at all
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: # THE ECONOMY IS DOING GREAT, THE DOW IS OVER 47,000!
[+8] u/AdCritical5383: #How the fuck am I supposed to create shareholder value when Claude Code is down. 😤
[+8] u/Les7X: Less than 6 hours ago, I lost 200$ on oil and promised to never touch it again. Now I'm here looking at the 1min chart for a small "dip"
[+8] u/ten7four: "Get ready for oil to be $200 a barrel, because the oil price depends on regional security, which you have destabilized."
So do we listen to the ceo of IREN or the ceo of 🥭
[+8] u/LeupMeisterGenral: I literally needed a pump or dump and I’ve got neither
[+8] u/Thebaxxxx: When you see me sleeping on the sidewalk its not becouse im homeless. Its becouse i decided that all i need is my cellphone to trade and a pair of shoes! All that other shit? Who needs it lol
[+8] u/Swiftnice: Wow looks like senate wants to put a hold on all PLTR contracts after it was used to target school children in Iran.
[+8] u/Low_Programmer1814: Frustrated as hell. Fuck SPY.
[+8] u/baconography: Move that decimal over to the right one number, and that Y/Y increase actually makes real-world sense.
We live in the dumbest timeline, where lying -- amongst other immoral behavior -- is normalized.
Dicks out for Harambe.
[+8] u/Blacketn1ght: SPY, I kindly request that you pick a direction and go 1% in that direction
[+8] u/Hot-Signature3626: Buy spy puts for tmr?
[+8] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: It’s been obvious to me that we’re in an extremely overvalued era so I’m buying calls
[+8] u/arothen: Russia can't even back itself
[+8] u/Fineous40: You spelled mattress wrong
[+7] u/Star_Lord924: St Patrick's day next week. Bullish. Its literally green on the horizon
[+7] u/Time_Molasses_1581: What is the Straight of Hummus? Calls at open
[+7] u/AgitatedJump8459: Oil is preparing for lift off. Adding to ma positio
[+7] u/This_Possible_3942: I have puts for today, so naturally hoping for the end of the world so I can make a few bucks 💪🏻
[+7] u/CUbuffGuy: Riveting CPI move. Theta sends its regards
[+7] u/IXI_Bman: I remember buying a half gallon of OJ for 1.99 try $8-10 now but inflation lower as ever LMAO. Spy should be sub 400. This is by far the worst timeline in 5 decades lmaooo
[+7] u/InformalMeal9828: New supreme leader got lightly injured they said…that means buddy got both legs blown off
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: What’s wild is in two weeks we’ll be onto some other unimaginably stupid debacle and there will still be bulls saying SPY700
[+7] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Surely the jobs created over the past nine months not including healthcare being -347,000 is bullish LMAO
[+7] u/AnotherDegenerateFK: I was on the phone with Iran and I told them “Don’t”.
[+7] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Unnatural pump, watch it pull back
[+7] u/jda823: Bunch of people just watch from sidelines today. Too many people got burnt yesterday
[+7] u/brannock_: Lol the fraud isn't sticking. That means a Trump tweet soon
[+7] u/Gom_KBull: ^(honestly fuck your calls)
# ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭
[+7] u/Burtonwurton: Any sign of a possible break is immediately shot down. Fuck you MMs
[+7] u/potato111a: Oh so it's the FBI turn to manipulate the market
[+7] u/HandsOnTheBible: You can just tell the market is going to take a big dump near the bell
[+7] u/---Right--Tackle---: Imagine having to trade for a living
[+7] u/outhinking: Guys forgot Iran is actually a real country
[+7] u/harryburton420: believe or not.. calls
[+7] u/Foreign_Fun_7193: Fear buying, pullback incoming
[+7] u/Ready_Scratch_1902: the stock market is a high school popularity contest
[+7] u/OkRecommendation1040: Life is just one big high school
[+7] u/dontlikeyacutG: whatever happens, im sure ill be on the wrong side of the trade
[+7] u/PatrickSebast: Looks like there is traffic going through the straight (guess there had to be for ships to be attacked): [https://www.marinevesseltraffic.com/HORMUZ-STRAIT/ship-traffic-tracker](https://www.marinevesseltraffic.com/HORMUZ-STRAIT/ship-traffic-tracker)
Wonder what the premiums on this are. How much do you need to pay to convince people to move a boat through there?
[+7] u/patmccock86: This is unprecedented desperation. Bessent is trying so fucking hard to keep this shit up for dear leader, it's going to fall hard shortly
[+7] u/Liability049-6319: Market dropping after realizing releasing reserves means this war isn't close to being over
[+7] u/ai___________: Everything is so fake now lmao
[+7] u/FxSpecter: FUCK THIS. FUCK YOU ALL. I'LL SEE Y'ALL TOMORROW.
[+7] u/weewoowewoooo: Entire market being held up by dental floss and tweets lmfao
[+7] u/ThoseGelInsertThings: I've closed out all of my trades that I opened since last Wednesday. I'm up 5% and I'm in cash until this chop makes a decision.
This has been a pretty difficult week of trading.
[+7] u/TheMightySet69: Are you there, Shrek? It's me, the market.
[+7] u/unhappyreach_: Heres the yahoo headline because everyone here is fuck faces
>FBI warns Iran aspired to attack California with drones in retaliation for war: Alert
[+7] u/Vegetable_Push6542: -2% tomorrow when reality sets in and people panic
[+7] u/outhinking: Wait until Asian market wakes up and pump oil to 110 figuring out Iran mined it up
[+7] u/saw-it: Stock price goes up, my puts go down. Stock price goes down, my puts stay the same.
[+7] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: May all your trades be filled with the conviction of a vegan CEO eating a burger today
[+7] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: Guys just be honest with CPI and give this ghey old ber what he needs today, which is to say one lil circuit breaker limit down. and yes, I'm saying THANK YOU in advance.
[+7] u/HomeMadeToast: I think I have sciatica
[+7] u/ToughVegetable2483: Fuck your calls fuck your puts
[+7] u/ARSC_RexH: So now I know. Oil tankers getting attacked = good. Got it.
[+7] u/This-Marzipan-5557: Hormuz is blockaded, mines are being deployed, arab states have been attacked, no end of war insight, usa cannot stop the war if the IRGC keeps the blockade “ cant just say we are done and have iran agree with it” this will prop be till the midterms buying oil now is a no brainer just dont overleverage ur POS
[+7] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: **cnn** now reporting on the tankers getting bodied in the strait
[+7] u/Glock7enteen: Msft and Apple fighting hard to compete for the shittiest stock 2026 award
[+7] u/booose6: Just need 🥭to send one more stupid tweet and i could be rich
[+7] u/DJ_LilSmoke: Microsoft to announce it will never have a green day again
[+7] u/OkRecommendation1040: I’ve been wrong 8 FUCKING times today spx puts now final play fuck off
[+7] u/Icommandyou: Okay but major doubts at a country trying to drone strike San Francisco
[+7] u/HonestScar7176: Now fucking dump hard. Come on.
[+7] u/SoloOutdoor: The next trick is everyone wfh to save gas. Then... then after that's proven to keep productivity for high wealthy fucks, RTO 2.0. "It just didnt work"
[+7] u/CaaCCeo: Pinned to 675 is criminal
[+7] u/TowelOld743: CPI today wasn't affected by oil prices, the next months CPI will be more interesting to look at.
[+7] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: Fuck this I'm buying 50k worth of legos and selling them when oil hits $200 a barrel.
[+7] u/Austin_Destroyer: I need a gif of Michael Cera getting impaled by a light pole, asking "is it bad?" from the movie This is the End.
[+7] u/Concerned_Fanboy: inflation lookin pretty g ood when you dont count things you need to buy to live
[+7] u/Disconn3cted: If Iran does something to stop this nbis pump, so I can buy back in, I will stop being gay and convert to Islam. Inshallah
[+7] u/yayahi: CPI rose without any of these oil gains baked in. And employment keeps dropping. LMAOOOO
[+7] u/good-times-: Mango speaks at 4:25pm
[+7] u/Disconn3cted: This market is dumb as shit
[+7] u/patmccock86: Sick fucking manipulation holy shit
[+7] u/adwise27: Thank god we have been investing in non-petroleum based energy production
[+7] u/jraiv420: Iran starting to lay those sea mines now
[+7] u/No-Improvement3164: VIX dumping nothing pumping 🤔
[+7] u/guy_cloutier: The 3 days special military operation is going well
[+7] u/DriftWoodBarrel: Even though I'm losing money I'm still having a good time. You know.
[+7] u/McKoijion: Ramadan ends in a week. After that, Iran's going to stop holding back.
[+7] u/spwath: This "V" is looking pretty pathetic compared to the dump. More dumps incoming. I am about to take a dump as well
[+7] u/Wowmuchrya: The year is 3026. SPY still has not reached 700.
100 trillion dollars of options premium has been collected with no end in sight.
[+7] u/DCHamar: Is everybody enjoying the chop?
[+7] u/Test-NetConnection: Who TF is buying Tesla? They've alienated half of their customer base and their cars are a decade behind their competitors. Guh. Oh wait, that's right, they are going to mars and selling remotely operated humanoid robots. Now that oil is prohibitively expensive the new gig economy will feature former doordash poors wiping my asshole from one of the musks new, gas generator powered datacenters in the desert.
[+7] u/urahozer: I'm convinced the market is invulnerable. Got war, ships getting hit in the straight, president can't keep 2 things straight on his words and here we are even
[+7] u/I_Sniff_Uranus: VIX is at 24 and we’re trading like it’s at 12. This is such bull shit
[+7] u/pineapplekiwipen: MSFT is the worst stock this world has ever seen
[+7] u/Far-Requirement9180: Some fifteen year old kid out there is making millions of dollars posting about stupid shit on Tik Tok while we are here losing our paychecks trying to be Warren Buffet lmaooooooooo
[+7] u/kintarogolden: naming your company chubb is hilarious
[+7] u/Level_Counter3062: BREAKING: INTERCONTINENTAL BALLISTIC MISSILES HEADED STRAIGHT FOR MY CALLS
[+7] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: My puts are not putting
[+7] u/Usedillusion7: If 🥭 is waiting for the market to close to speak it must mean it's good news right guys?
[+7] u/According-Page8618: stopped investing in Eurpoor stoxx 50 because it always made less gains then us stocks and also fell more than US stocks, also fell on US shit like bad CPI, flat from feb 2025 to nov 2025.
then it went on a insane december > february +14% spree and i decided to fuck it and buy, because the dollar decline fucked me hard aswell on spy, 1 week later war begins and it loses 13%. nice, meanwhile spy only down like 1,5% from war begin.
[+7] u/DriftWoodBarrel: Iran is winning the war if you ask the stock market
[+7] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Green days = +1.5%, red days = -0.15%
[+7] u/FrostingOk2692: Building generational wealth is nice and all, but have you considered building generational bagholders?
[+7] u/enc-nyc: Jobless claims tomorrow: by logic SPY shouldn't pump last 30 mins, but how do I know ... this is 100% retarded market
[+7] u/lysergalien: She plow through my strait til I kaboom
[+7] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won
---
/u/BlackBlood4567 made a bet that NBIS would go to 105.0 within **1 week** when it was 86.99 and it did, congrats you fuckin nerd.
Their record is now 4 wins and 1 losses
You're a part of the [WSB Discord server](http://discord.gg/wsbverse), therefore you earned 10,000 coins for your win!
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+7] u/2020isgreat: Yo Bessent can you prop up equities instead of fucking with oil
[+7] u/Abe2025: Iran sent their terms to end the war and I dont think orange man is going to accept. That just means a blood bath market but hey, this market is rigged any way
[+7] u/blm4lyfe: 🥭: you’re on your own Israel lol
[+7] u/tika_dengu: 🇮🇷 threatening $200 oil is just empty rhetoric, we need boots on the ground to call their bluff
[+7] u/zeren1ty: Wow 400 million barrels! So a mere 20 days worth of oil…
Then what?
[+7] u/Far-Requirement9180: Nobody is willing to hold any position anymore longer than five minutes LMAOOOOOOOOO
[+7] u/cannythecat: They can't keep getting away with this. Not one day without V
[+7] u/AlphaHarmony: market flat, amazing
[+7] u/Valkorion335786: "If you short it, it will pump."- Field of Dreams
[+7] u/patmccock86: Anytime there's a move down, it's immediately bought up. It's so obvious they're refusing to let the market move naturally for "morale" purposes. We will break through this floor
[+7] u/LeakMyBigBowls: Dear diary, today I lost money.
[+7] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: 🚨NO POLICY MOVE CAN STOP CRUDE’S RISE: CARLYLE ENERGY
Jeff Currie, says no policy move can stop crude’s rise, even with a Middle East ceasefire. Supply-chain disruptions—from misplaced ships, canceled insurance, and slowed output in Saudi Arabia, Iraq, and the UAE—will take months to fix. He called oil reserve releases a “minuscule offset” to the ongoing disruption.
[+7] u/brannock_: Pam Bondi said the Dow was over 50,000 and that's why you shouldn't care about the Epstein files showing all the bankers and government leaders getting together to rape and eat children.
Bessent openly says he's going to short oil futures with the backing of the US Treasury
And you think the government isn't trying to keep this shit afloat?
[+7] u/pineapplekiwipen: SPY is down but a lot of high beta shit are still up, seems bullish
[+7] u/Waiting4Reccession: How many times is this retarded market going to fall for empty talk
[+7] u/Consistent-Motor5196: Here's your exit point don't miss it.
[+7] u/CheekyPooh: Today is just a big fuck you to all option traders. Should have just sat this out. Couldn't even close my ORCL calls for a profit.
[+7] u/Out_Phishing: Just want to extend a great big fuck you too msft
[+7] u/---Right--Tackle---: Tom Brady got weird looking
[+7] u/housemoneyrocketship: Ban me from 0dte please
[+7] u/MRROSADOH: Guys my mom said she won’t fund my gambling addiction anymore. What do i do
[+7] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: This war market moves like a baby giraffe
[+7] u/spyputs1: They releasing the oil reserves like the files, only partially and highly redacted
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: We’re proud of you, son
[+7] u/throwawaydonaldinho: Everythings red including gold and uso wtf
[+7] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won
---
/u/EggEnvironmental3327 made a bet that ORCL would go to 167.84 within **3 days** when it was 149.86 and it did, congrats autist.
Their record is now 1 wins and 0 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+7] u/bertacle: even if the earth ran out of drinkable water, the S&P 500 would probably only drop like 0.06%
[+7] u/adwise27: I made a ton of money at the casino this weekend (about $24) and I have to say, it really is lonely at the top. Have felt like shit all week, no place of belonging... especially here. I need a new wolfpack
[+7] u/2020isgreat: up 40k on oil longs don't care Bessent fuck you not taking proift
[+7] u/falling_knives: Pump and dump complaints have increased 330% since last year according to [this news report](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHdJEYJ6ucY).
Anyone who DMs you out of the blue talking about stocks, 99% of the time, it's to get you into their Discord or Whatsapp or Telegram group so they can scam you. The other 1%, they want to get your feet pics.
[+7] u/DonDiabloTheGreat: #Allaaaaaah Snack-bar
[+7] u/skychief99: When Orange Julius was asked to justify bombing Iran, his response was.....
"To have every country on the planet aside from Israel hate us bigly. The bigliest actually".
[+7] u/SupramanE89: It’s because their only 2 choices are start WW3/ crazy distraction or go to prison as pedos. Guess which one they picked?
[+7] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: We haven’t even had the real drop yet
[+7] u/Star_Lord924: Someone kick SPY in its metaphorical fucking nuts and get it moving for fucks sake
[+7] u/Bravadette: Man the S&P 1Y and 5Y chart is ominous af. I dont like that curvature.
[+7] u/ckami_91: Israel nukes Iran
SPY & QQQ -.01%
[+7] u/guusderaaf: sir this is a casino
[+7] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Every indicator we've had already shows that CPI is going to be hot. So the real question is will the market ignore it this time like it has the last 5 times we've got indicators of high inflation/shitty job market. Methinks this is the time we finally dump because of the war + high inflation + shitty ORCL earnings combo.
As to ORCL earnings it only pumped cause it's so beaten up. They are now 135 billion in debt in a time of great uncertainty. I see Oracle selling off into the 130s sometime this month.
[+7] u/betyourask: Gigadumping on news that you touch yourself at night
Green by open ber fk dont be a poosy sail the boats
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: Spending $billions to make gas more expensive and promote a son to his father’s throne but it’s really the Mexicans that are the problem? Fuck I hate this place lmao
[+7] u/TowelOld743: IEA wants to release 400 million barrels of oil into the market
[+7] u/ARSC_RexH: Fuck I was gonna be profitable until about 10 minutes ago. God damn it.
[+7] u/Star_Lord924: CMON SPY. PUMP YOU FUCKING CUM GUZZLING GUTTERSLUT
[+7] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: Bears were hoping for WW3. Instead, they got V V 3
[+7] u/Star_Lord924: This action on spy is the most pathetic thing to watch.
[+7] u/SwiftSG1: AI this, precision that, bombed school on first day.
[+7] u/---Right--Tackle---: Is it gonna be one of those days when SPY randomly pumps 1% the last 10 minutes
[+7] u/SighRamp: last time SPY closed 2 days under 100 daily proceeded to dropped 100 points
[+6] u/PushAble2463: Oil reserve already priced in, oil still rising
[+6] u/Fitzaroo: Im starting to think the war isnt over guys.
[+6] u/awetfartruinedmylife: polymarket is a wire transfer from the poor to the rich
[+6] u/UnivalveX: just dump once for fucks sake
[+6] u/qui_tam_gogh: Very.
Stable.
Genius.
[+6] u/DriftWoodBarrel: Think I might just take my 3% loss for the day and exit the market
[+6] u/Right_Traffic_4821: If the missiles hit downtown Los Angeles they will do literally 100s of dollars of damages.
[+6] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: The weekly dump tomorrow is gonna be yuge
[+6] u/colinr813: Short squeeze the US Treasury
[+6] u/jagaddjag: Cpi number will allow 🥭 to let crude go higher
[+6] u/zeren1ty: So let me get this straight…
A headline is released saying “g7” considering releasing oil reserves, oil drops from 115 to 90 as a result
Mango then claims war is over to get oil to drop from 90 to 80, which turns out to be nonsense
Now g7 come out again today saying yep we’re doing what we said we would and releasing the reserves
How many bearish headlines do they need to announce the same thing lmao
[+6] u/Ceyenne18: Release of oil reserves is not stopping oil price from moving back up.
Good luck.
[+6] u/2020isgreat: To beat the U.S. in war just crash the stock market
[+6] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: Oh fuck this market is going to believe every lie, puts just went back to break even, I’m out. Switching to calls
[+6] u/2020isgreat: "I currently estimate the notional size of the crude oil futures short the US government ends up putting on to be roughly whatever $10 billion in margin gets you."-Citrini
[+6] u/AdamantheusEnigma: parasailing in the strait of hormuz will be so much fun this summer when it’s turned into an all inclusive resort
[+6] u/Little_Top3815: Shit waiting for cpi then we go to shite
[+6] u/MrsEveryShot: anyone else do their taxes based off of vibes?
[+6] u/Weak_Ostrich459: NVDA investing $2B in NBIS
[+6] u/---Right--Tackle---: #Release the hounds!
[+6] u/CPA-hole: How was the consumer pussy index?
[+6] u/WhoLickedMyDumpling: Has anyone really studied up the taco patterns, i mean like actual, side-by-side news headline to market action? The bol case is 🌮, ber case is long list of war inflation blahblah AI spending something debt something private credit.
Seriously the ber case this morning just ranted on and on for like 3 screens of text and bol case was one sentence.
[+6] u/Puzzleheaded-Crew668: And we're right back to 0%
[+6] u/DeezSpicyNuts: One big room
Full of bad bitches
[+6] u/LargeBagHolder: This is a theta day if I’ve ever seen one
[+6] u/Pizzapimento: Crude oil moving like a memestock. Anyone shorting oil is retarded but I cant profit by buying because there's too many retards
[+6] u/Antique_Bat5003: Yeah so I live in San Diego with the largest military base on the west coast. cool cool.
[+6] u/Emilio___Molestevez: datacenters: booming
oil: expensive
NUCLEAR STOCKS: FUCKING DED
[+6] u/GoogleKushforLunch: I got Jersey mikes for lunch
[+6] u/pinkerton_gov: Why’s it so hard for this to sell off but pumps on a worthless tweet?
[+6] u/solidsneeze: last minute preparation of CPI:
"let's just move this decimal point over... here"
[+6] u/Snoo_9489: Bulls when they type LOL BEARS and the market immediately drops
[+6] u/tastyfreeeze69: How are ships getting blown up in the homos straight and the markets not dumped
[+6] u/borkdpasito: Beautiful shrek dildos on Oil 🛢️🛢️🛢️🚀
[+6] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: I do enjoy watching algos work the 1 second. Kinda cool to see them punch down big orders so they can get fills at lower prices.
[+6] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: I'm down 90k YTD and I owe 45k in taxes from last year lmfao
[+6] u/Flat-Focus7966: We are finishing green...
[+6] u/Independent_Bag9914: Finally just sucked it up and dumped SLV for a loss
[+6] u/neo-futurism: Market wants to trap more Bulls before the inevitable plunge. I don’t mind it all.
[+6] u/TechnologyEven6926: I’m genuinely still shocked about 83 fucking points
The NBA is so dead LMAO
[+6] u/HandsomeTod11: The second hand cringe when Kash first said Valhalla will stick with me for life. Along with the herpes I got from Cathie Wood
[+6] u/lessoninprogress: HOW CAN THIS POSSIBLY GO BACK UP UN FUCKING REAL
[+6] u/Star_Lord924: I quit at trading and life.
[+6] u/ten7four: Bols, don't sell those -50% calls just yet, there's still time to make it back!!! 🤣🤣
[+6] u/pineapplekiwipen: SPY still stuck at six seven as kids might say
[+6] u/ServoFFXI: Sand dick is unstoppable
[+6] u/pmotiveforce: Surely TSLA not going up because people are literally stupid enough to think they will sell more cars because of a blip in oil prices? I mean, people aren't \_that\_ facile and stupid are they?
[+6] u/MagicMoon: So oil is gonna pump today?
[+6] u/BoringAward2832: I need calls what we buying today US OIL??
[+6] u/hayleybts: Stop this stupid war
[+6] u/orsomeshitidk: I feel like I’m only about 75% good at being an adult.
[+6] u/ResidentPack4103: THERE EATING THE DOGS
[+6] u/G0RD0N_CLARK: Consider me underwhelmed.
[+6] u/Bxdwfl: In line with estimates?? Damn, shit must be really bad
[+6] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: we may have forgotten about epstein but i am still waiting for Putin to drop the pee pee tapes
[+6] u/ismebbb: Why can't we just all buy and never sell and become rich together and just take loans against our stocks. It'd be an infinite money glitch
[+6] u/Extreme_Green_1708: Guy at the gym told me to get into silver and gold. Tops in on metals
[+6] u/Mother_Big9112: Can you hear it?
The random shrekcock coming?
[+6] u/hey-coffee-eyes: My door-to-door gasoline company is suffering immensely. I've been drinking too much gasoline trying to siphon it.
[+6] u/Powered_by_Ghost: Bro wtf is going on. I literally just bought and it’s tanking lol
[+6] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Can we get the Oman guy to say talks are going well again? But this time with the oil fields burning in the background.
[+6] u/NVDAismyg0d: $3000 in the trading port and mortgage is $4500 due next Friday. Am I cooked
[+6] u/thetalentedmrbowser: I couldn’t be more bearish and want to full port puts. So calls at open has to be the move
[+6] u/GoProVI: I just shit myself in the Walmart parking lot
[+6] u/Dizzy-Green-3188: She's from Texas I can tell by the way she saved 80k on state taxes
[+6] u/Stop_The_Rain: I can hear the machines laughing at me!
[+6] u/Sea-Refrigerator7919: Does anyone here actually trade with technical analysis or is it just vibes?
[+6] u/M18PowerKing: Is SPY going to be super flat until cpi?
[+6] u/rollinhating: Only thing that will pressure 🥭 now is if Iran attacks a oil tanker… Since G7 basiclly bought 🥭 3- 4 weeks of oil price relief
[+6] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: Even Baghdad Bob thinks Karoline Leavitt is “a little much”
[+6] u/OkRecommendation1040: Can this fucking piece of shit stop changing directions every second
[+6] u/Pls9887: It's really weird, whenever I start jacking off it seems like my options improve. Anyone else have that?
[+6] u/Skd98012: #Bow to your ghey ber lords
🙇🙇♀️🙇♂️🌈🐻🙇♂️🙇♀️🙇
[+6] u/No_Somewhere3288: Victory will be declared at $200 a barrel
[+6] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: POLYMARKET: >$100 bbl oil by end of March has gone up 30% in the last 24 hours.
[+6] u/AdCritical5383: Good afternoon, everyone. This is a reminder that the pizza party is only for those on track to meet their Q1 quotas.
[+6] u/UnivalveX: better luck becoming the next Khamenei than making money on puts in this market
[+6] u/blm4lyfe: 🥭 is treating Iran like side quest
[+6] u/tommyboy441: I honestly have no idea what to buy right now, there is no telling what could happen next. Nothing feels good at the moment.
[+6] u/whydouhatemecablegod: did Iran even say thank you for the free missiles
[+6] u/BobsBurners420: The coordinated buying at -.50% is absolutely wild
[+6] u/ChickenYip: QQQ up because Iran isnt targeting the nasdaq building !!
[+6] u/25obviousreasons: REPERATIONS??? Yeah this war ain't ending
[+6] u/Outside_Empty: Welp boys, that’s it for me. See y’all in the afterlife
[+6] u/No_Tough_2065: 10 mins til power hour, meal team six ready to feed the bulls 😎
[+6] u/sloanemonroe: There’s gotta be some people with a brain who are saying “fuck this shit. I’m selling”
[+6] u/DingleJingle_: An Iranian security source has told Al Jazeera that the continuing US attacks on the country might soon lead to the emergence of a fresh theatre of conflict in the region.
“The regional war will soon enter a new phase,” the official said, speaking on condition of anonymity. “As we said from the very beginning, if the United States makes such a mistake, the situation will become far more complex. Soon, another key strait will face the same fate as the Strait of Hormuz.”
The security source did not offer more details or specify which other “key strait” might next face a de facto blockade.
“Iran’s security and defensive plans are phased and gradual, and we still have many cards left to play,” the official said.
Have we priced in the houthis targeting ships on the Red Sea?
[+6] u/Vegetable_Push6542: How do we actually defeat Iran. If we ever get close to toppling the regime they'll go scorched earth and completely annihilate Qatar, UAE, etc.
[+6] u/Entire-Flatworm-8498: It really just shows how wsb has grown up... Started with a video game store... Not it's older and it's all abound a boner pill company. Amazing
[+6] u/csr8765: Short banks, airlines, software. Long energy, semi’s. About as easy of a market as it gets
[+5] u/Bizonistic: 45 mins till inflation data comes out, we can finally see how well they are cooked
[+5] u/ecoburner87: one thing i don't think most americans fully understand, because we live so far away and generally lack solidarity and global understanding, is that the price for all these arab nations to let us use their countries and resources for military build-up, air bases, cheap oil, the trade was that they could build up their tourism and finance sectors and we would protect them. there should not be 1 drone hitting a hotel, not 1 missile hitting an airport, especially over a series of events/attacks an american leader provokes and sets into motion. i don't think americans understand how badly we're screwing up our strategic interests over there by going along with netanyahu's and trump's distraction war, these nations don't trust us and are seeing how vulnerable we are, the emperor has no clothes. these nations are in economic cycles that require peacetime and growth, and we just changed the rules of the game in a few months
[+5] u/gamersEmpire: HIMS giving me a boner without any pills holy fuck
[+5] u/Valuable_Sundae5737: Does anyone else cancel out their orders when they go take a piss just so they can put them back in because they dont want to miss actually seeing it happen in real time?
[+5] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won
---
/u/Sad-Airman made a bet that ORCL would go to 162.55 within **6 hours** when it was 164.19 and it did, congrats autist.
Their record is now 19 wins and 4 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+5] u/2020isgreat: I really think Bessent needs to diversify his portfolio
[+5] u/teh_herper: #If only you could trade options for 24 hours
[+5] u/CallsOrPutsYES: Has a history of it! Lets break the record 36% single day gain then it can tank
[+5] u/ResidentPack4103: 15 min until ber homeless
[+5] u/AnxiousPilot007: When are regards going to realise the money from GCC countries will dry up which was pammming US stocks. Once regards realise the dammmppp is inevitable.
Thank you for attention to this matter.
[+5] u/pooterssssssssss: 9 min until we all are broke or bull market begins again. Good luck?
[+5] u/eggnogui: Three tankers on fire in the strait was already priced in, apparently.
[+5] u/Pazzaaaaaa: BERS in absolute disbelief we are opening flat after tankers hit by drones overnight.
[+5] u/ToughVegetable2483: I’ve seen enough wipe the portfolios
[+5] u/LostandConfused2024: Only 13k more until I break-even. A FUCKING BATTLE ITS BEEN MAN
[+5] u/tommylol66: I guess market is either waiting on oil numbers or taco speech
[+5] u/This_Possible_3942: 666 was a fair number
[+5] u/Jarlaxle_rigged_it: It's really impossible to short this market
[+5] u/fan_of_hakiksexydays: I wish that "don't worry it's already priced in" also worked on the price when I have to pump gas or buy stuff at the grocery store.
[+5] u/youreaditfirst: Buy **LAND** and those options are dirt cheap. I am about to drop 35k on calls but I cant post since the stock is not at 500 mil. I think the stock could go to $30 by the end of year.
[+5] u/ShortAssRibs: Another W for theta gang.
[+5] u/OsamaBagHolding: Breaking: Iranian Sleeper Cells To Target Starter Homes, Housing Affordability - Rooters
[+5] u/2020isgreat: Ending completely flat would be objectively the funniest scenario
[+5] u/Extreme_Green_1708: “MANIPULATION” - bears betting against something that has literally always gone up for all of existence.
[+5] u/baconography: Nothing to report except IV crush.
Wall Street thanks you for your donation today.
[+5] u/According-Page8618: past 7 CPI's we pumped on open,
[+5] u/zeren1ty: No stopping oil now 🛢️🛢️
[+5] u/trainwreck001: IRAN HAS 2,000 - 3,000 SEA MINES AND UNLIMITED DRONES FOR ATTACKS ON THE STRAITS.
RUSSIA IS NOW BACKING IRAN MILITARILY.
OIL $300
[+5] u/surely_not_abot: yes ber this is personal
[+5] u/abused-throwawayy: Told yall these numbers aint no where near bad enough, the Hormuz aint even open right now and that shit didnt crash the market. There is no such thing as bad news anymore
[+5] u/dangerusZone: Damn It feels good to be a bear, a real gay ass bear plays his cards right.
[+5] u/Far-Requirement9180: MU recovered in two days what it lost in one month. That summarizes the current markets
[+5] u/GibonFrog: the fert (fertilizer) play is even more compelling than oil; there is no global fert reserve that can aromotize the shock
[+5] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: close your eyes, imagine a flat line, open your eyes