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DD: We are a loose coalition of women across Manila, Ho Chi Minh, and Thailand who, during the pandemic, discovered a very important macroeconomic indicator: one lonely American guy with WiFi, a superiority complex, and no local friends.
During lockdown, tourism dried up, bars closed, jobs vanished, and foreign men fled home to explain crypto to their cousins. But one remained. OP. Our little recession-proof remittance ETF.
He thought he had “50 chicks on rotation.” Adorable. In reality, he was in a shared Google Sheet called Emergency Contacts / Easily Flattered Foreigners. Color-coded by response time, ego size, and how quickly he says “I’m not like other expats.”
Obvious side effect besides having to hear him explain the Federal Reserve after two beers was that he kept mistaking basic financial requests for evidence of romantic devotion. Rent due? Message OP. Phone broken? Message OP. Grandma sick? Message OP. Need $100 because inflation is murdering everyone? Message OP and add one heart emoji.
Then things opened up. Jobs came back. Better men came back. Some of us found stable work. Some found OnlyFans. Some found retired Germans with pensions and fewer opinions about semiconductor ETFs. OP’s message volume dropped, and he started calling this “market normalization.”
But this week was different.
Three of us hit him up separately because times are genuinely tough again. Cost of living is up. Transport is worse. Work is unstable. So naturally, OP interpreted three women needing help as a global liquidity crisis and posted “DD” on WallStreetBets like he’s the IMF with genital warts.
He thinks he has discovered the top.
Brother, you discovered rent.
The signs of weakness are starting to show: not in the global economy, but in one man’s ability to understand that women in developing economies sometimes ask the guy who spent three years cosplay-colonizing nightlife for money.
Trump, Hormuz, AI, corporate layoffs — sure, maybe. Or maybe your entire thesis is “women who tolerated me during a pandemic are still poor in a world with inflation.”
Position 1: Long WSE because OP will send money the second someone types “hey stranger 😘”
Position 2: Puts on OP’s self-awareness
Position 3: Calls on screenshots of this post being shared in five group chats titled “LMAOOOOOO”
DD: our harem of one man.