What Are Your Moves Tomorrow, March 12, 2026

[+155] u/Country_Gravy420: Probably a +2% day tomorrow since that wouldn't make any sense [+140] u/II2-Woolly: “This war is over, pretty much” - direct quote 2 days ago as my puts were evaporated [+120] u/Lcc30: Day 11,822 still no Lamborghini [+114] u/DefiantDelta: It’s a war. It’s a military operation. It’s an excursion. Iran started it. Israel started it. We started it. It’s ending now. It’s just beginning. It’s been going on for 47 years. [+111] u/tails2729: Still convinced we all died during covid and we are living in purgatory [+99] u/2020isgreat: THE PROJECT COULD PRODUCE ABOUT 45,000–55,000 BARRELS PER DAY INITIALLY AND POTENTIALLY REACH 60,000 BPD BY THE END OF THE DECADE, PART OF TRUMP’S PUSH TO EXPAND U.S. ENERGY OUTPUT AMID RISING FUEL PRICES. He's talking about policies that create 55k barrels a day LMFAO[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2031827032611680546) [+98] u/Clear-West747: We could’ve just flooded Iran with glocks and crack instead [+77] u/wildcat1055: POTUS retardmaxxing again? [+73] u/user0384849023: before you go all in on a stock, go over to r/valueinvesting to see if it’s been mentioned in there recently. if it has whatever you do DONT BUY this IS financial advice [+73] u/AfraidAnalyst: Unspecified potential attacks to the west coast at an unknown time are possible. The FBI agents get paid to give that information [+66] u/klippklar: I don’t want the President of the USA to have a cognitive deficiency either, yet here we are. [+65] u/newtoeso: My moves for tomorrow are waiting for another episode of gibberish from the orange buffoon. [+59] u/Independent_Drop4317: I made $53 today risking 5k on a straddle 🫩 [+57] u/OsamaBinBrowsin: As someone that follows the Iran war closely, I think it’s clear the Strait of Hormuz will stay closed for some time and the Iran war will drag on. Has the market priced this in? Who tf knows. It rebounded off hopium tweets alone [+56] u/TowelOld743: New FED chair Jake Paul [+55] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: https://preview.redd.it/eg7i8zfhbiog1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e7e3a0c476d785aa3b3c01506a71039f2dbb77b2 [+55] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: Daily check in. To encourage participation raise your hand if you lost money today 🧍 [+53] u/looool_k_libtard: In all my years of trading oil (3 days) I’ve never seen anything like this [+51] u/oldsguy65: Pretty soon the White House will start talking about the Epstein files in order to distract from the war. [+51] u/Retaining-Wall: We're living in a Black Mirror episode, except the pig is fucking us. [+50] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: #Trump has his top scientists working to turn his diaper waste into crude oil [+50] u/East-Resolution4446: Iran war must be bad if Fox News is only talking nonstop about Epstein files now [+49] u/Such_Coin: Considering we have a hot war with Iran, oil $100 a barrel, more tariffs coming, yields spiking, etc. its pretty amazing we are only 25 points off ATH in SPY. [+49] u/Cold_Respond_7656: Jokes on US Iran are day trading oil. Buy calls, let some ships through Sell calls buy puts, do something or threaten to in the strait Repeat [+45] u/Salty-Bid1597: There's an awful lot of explosions happening given the war ended two days ago. [+45] u/WSB-mods-are-: sneak preview of S&P futes to open 7:00pm -1% 12:00am -2% 7:00am -1% 9:29am -0.5% 9:30am +0.05% [+42] u/bigmeatbag: Donnie should order Pete and Marco to sail a catamaran through the strait to show it's safe for tankers, would be hilarious. [+40] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: TRUMP TO REPLACE PETE HEGSETH WITH JAKE PAUL. SAYS “HE’S A FIGHTER AND CAN GET IT DONE” [+40] u/CoffeeMaster000: MAGA voters get drafted first 👍 [+39] u/AgitatedJump8459: Usa is so fucking retarded. Just imagine how pathetic this shit show must look to the leaders of other countries. This is actually insane. You cant make it up [+38] u/spyputs1: Jake the new ayatollah of Iran [+38] u/solidsneeze: never underestimate how insane a religious cult is [+38] u/Retaining-Wall: Just woke up from a coma. How's Kamla's term going? [+37] u/Agitated-Lobster-623: 🥭 urging ships to go through the straight 😂 This is what happens when your leader is a spoiled rich kid who's never lived in a reality. Yeah send a ship through and watch oil skyrocket even more when more ships get blown up [+36] u/AfraidAnalyst: Holy shit this time line really is fucked Harambe really was the top [+36] u/SomePolack: Vibes are fucking horrendous [+36] u/Apprehensive_Rush497: 5 upvotes and ill yolo everything into USO puts [+35] u/KittyLover-7: “I had a feeling they would attack us soon so I attacked” 😂😂😂 Congrats, you just speedran your country through the next 5 years of inflation in your first year because of tariffs and oil [+35] u/Hot-Performancy: Yall are the fastest news outlet there is I get all my news from here [+35] u/Ok-Reach-2580: We went from "The War will be Painful" to "The War is Over" to "Iran is placing mines everywhere and blowing shit up" to "I was just doing what Rubio and Hegseth advised me to do" in like less than half a week. [+33] u/PompeiiSketches: Iran could set the entire gulf on literal fire and this retarded market would still pump on a Truth post. [+32] u/infernalbunny98: I feel like I'm watching an old man jerk himself off, Jesus Christ [+31] u/shinigami_2245: Epic fury is such a lame ass name for an operation [+30] u/PushAble2463: I’m just gonna say it right now… things ain’t looking good for the next generation (and the already living generations) of Hawksbill turtles :( Their mating season is fucking right now in the Persian gulf on the islands Qeshm, Sheedvar and Hendourabi. Could literally not have picked a worse spot. I am once again asking for ceasefire during turtle mating season. [+30] u/KittyLover-7: A stock market crash is worse than divorce because you lose your money and your wife is still around [+30] u/WickedTwista: There's an alternate timeline out there where SPY hits 850 while Sleepy Joe licks his ice cream in the Oval Office [+29] u/Leather_Mention5916: Obama should have never get in a war with Iran its very bad decision, just like mango predicted!! [+28] u/Same_College2053: They hit the golf course no injuries reported [https://www.cnn.com/2026/03/11/news/california-rancho-palos-verdes-trunp-golf-course-drone-attack](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ?si=8uGm49UYV4FN2GaY) [+28] u/Early-Elderberry-150: I will never forgive you Ameritards for electing this orange pedo into office for a second time [+28] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Issue is if he tacos Iran just keeps launching missiles and making us look even fucking dumber and betting against his ego is a fools errand [+27] u/OrangMiskin: Imagine thinking this retard would be the one to save America and lift you out of poverty? LMAO [+27] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: You ever look at the chart at the end of the day and think “what a fuck’in waste of a day”? [+27] u/Wowmuchrya: Goldman: Highest short position since covid Also Goldman: Stock market could violently rally if any good news Translation: "Hold our bags" [+27] u/Same-Brilliant2014: damnnn 11.3 billion spent on 1 week of war. im just glad we blew those kids up instead of funding schools, healthcare, student loans or gross vets. yucky [+26] u/Valkorion335786: Some financial tips: - Pay off your credit card payments - Create a budget - Save a portion of each paycheck - Oh none of this working? It’s heist time baby - Get the gang back together - One last job, then you can all retire - You did it!! - But at what cost? Rick died in the heist. [+26] u/Retaining-Wall: Market: I am not healthy. Guys I need help. I don't think I'm okay. WSB: do a fuckin backflip. [+25] u/2020isgreat: Senior Israeli defense official tells i24NEWS following tonight’s large-scale rocket barrage by Hezbollah against Northern Israel: “They have left us no choice — this campaign must expand in Lebanon. There is no one to talk to on the other side. We are considering strikes against infrastructure targets connected to the Lebanese Government. Iran asked, Hezbollah complied — and now we must escalate our response by several levels.” um [+25] u/AlmightyCheesusCrust: So many fats at this rally [+25] u/Ready-Tennis8577: Come here Jake Paul Tell them their private credit is fine [+25] u/CPA-hole: Hello I’m here to spread fear and misinformation [+25] u/friendshabitsfamily: DoorDash is a great way to spend $25 on a $12 meal [+24] u/spyputs1: Jerome Powell getting audited for $3bil on a new building looking at Pete Hegseth blowin $90Bil in September like wtf [+24] u/throwawayainteasy: Iran: We'll bomb Microsoft! US Gov't: We'll retaliate even harder. US Companies: Outrageous! Everyone in tech and office workers: Please do it. [+24] u/Junkingfool: I made $23 dollars today.. Behold ME! [+24] u/bobbyknight102: I typically trade 40 hours a week to make 8 dollar profit, im at 9$ before Thursday. Stay tuned [+24] u/sailorsmile: Anyone posting on Facebook right now about how they’re willing to “pay more at the pump for freedom” needs to suit up and head to Iran right now, idgaf that you are a 60 year old obese woman [+24] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Just woke up from a coma Last thing I remember is dumbfuck Russians calling an obvious multi year war a "few weeks special operation" LMAO Anyway, how are things going ? [+24] u/Such_Coin: I have now been holding sentry here on the Cali Coast for 5 hours. Times of war require great sacrifice. Even wars that ended 2 days ago. Still no sign of the Iranian Drones- but to be honest I may have been distracted by watching the bid/ask on my UVIX options and missed a few. Latest developments are some high school kids were taking dabs, and a couple got in a kerfuffle when the banana boat spray sunscreen blew into one of their eyes. [+23] u/2020isgreat: DOE SAYS THE 172 MILLION BARREL RELEASE WILL TAKE APPROXIMATELY 120 DAYS TO DELIVER BASED ON PLANNED DISCHARGE RATES. LMFAO[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2031867610988679671) [+23] u/soad1331: In case you weren't depressed enough, sadly I had to put my cat down today 😢 [+23] u/DrElkSnout: The war is over, but be prepared for $200 barrel oil since the war is not over. [+23] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Unironically calling people panicans when 20% of the worlds oil supply is actively locked up in a goofy ass war is quite possibly one of the most retarded things you can say [+23] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: #guys I bought 1000 barrels of soybean oil by accident [+23] u/neutralpoliticsbot: Just the nerve of Joe Biden to start this war while not even being president somewhere at the beach in Delaware. How could you Joe? Joever. [+22] u/Gom_KBull: *Bol gets visited by their future self* **Future bol:** "HEY listen, SPY is going to fall to 640 next week, you NEED TO BUY PUTS. DONT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE I DID!" **Bol:** "Oh shit, thanks fam!" *Future bol nods smiling and leaves.* **Bol:** *\*cackling\** fuck that ghey ber, im buying more calls. [+22] u/2020isgreat: PENTAGON IS RECRUITING BANKERS FROM GOLDMAN SACHS AND JPMORGAN FOR A NEW "ECONOMIC DEFENSE UNIT," ACCORDING TO SEMAFOR. It is just so fucking blatant[](https://x.com/FirstSquawk/status/2031848265193521655) [+22] u/soscribbly: Maturing is realizing the US government are the real terrorists [+22] u/Emc79: He just bored someone to death.. [+22] u/Ok-Thought-9960: *someone dying in crowd  🥭 " DJ spin that shit!" [+22] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: U.S. INTELLIGENCE FINDS IRAN GOVERNMENT NOT AT RISK OF COLLAPSE -SOURCES [+22] u/One_Impression_2253: put the oil in smaller barrels = more barrels. boom oil supply FIXED [+22] u/Pulled_Forward: So apparently the intel from Netanyahoo on Iran’s nuclear facilities to get the US to invade Iran was actually just a picture of 🥭 and Epstein [+22] u/el-art-seam: He’s talking about kumula and sleepy and Hussein. I can’t believe he was able to bomb Iran, fuck the oil markets, and the world just goes along with him. War over. Fuck off. [+22] u/hakan_loob44: Oil tanker going up in flames right now. SPX 7000 at open tomorrow. [+21] u/Even-Square-6246: Made no money I’m broke everyday [+21] u/Ornery_Intern_2084: I swear he dont know what he says... He just wanna hear ppl cheer [+21] u/PushAble2463: Imagine the guys stuck on ships in Hormuz reading the news about the war being won during the initial first hour… meanwhile you are on week 2 away from home, no beers and the ship next to you is fucking engulfed in flames [+21] u/JackORoses: I'm old enough to remember Pam Blondi saying everything was great because the DOW was at 50k. [+21] u/DonDiabloTheGreat: This is why you don’t give retarded people total control. Sorry for being mean but it’s true. [+21] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Fake deal announced = +2%, fake deal retracted = -0.3% [+21] u/Locke_____Lamora: Must suck being a bear lately and see all your hypothetical gains disappear by market open over and over lmao [+21] u/Ill-Expression1737: https://preview.redd.it/heanuqysqhog1.jpeg?width=1064&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=45f855c05f12528f8182bd975c463a477e679761 us tomorrow [+21] u/cashflow_: Observations about different Asian ethnicities from my days at Swiss international boarding school Chinese: kinda aloof and withdrawn but smart South Koreans: super westernized, social and into hip hop Japanese: fucking in the woods nonstop This has been a cashflow comment describing his experience with different Asian ethnicities [+21] u/Bam2458: Hegseth about to join Noem on the orange brick road to scapegoat city. [+21] u/RockasaurusRex: When the Strait of Hormuz eventually reopens there's only one port that's big enough to take on all those backed up loads at once; your mother. [+20] u/Marshmallowmind2: What sad is that we aren't debating about education and health policies for the people anymore anymore but talking about invading countries and capturing leaders every day [+20] u/pootenanner: Oil cannot be stopped. It’s not speculation it’s an actual supply shortage with no end in sight. Bessent bout to get Rick rolled with our tax dollars so who cares lmao [+20] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: The market hangs on every word from history's biggest pathological liar lmfao we're cooked [+20] u/curling_rocks: It makes sense oil is more expensive at night all the gas stations are closed. Supply and demand [+20] u/mortalrem1nder: On a flight to Riyadh then driving to Bahrain. Gotta go check this shit out for myself. [+20] u/MagJack: A doctor? at a trump rally? good luck with that [+20] u/UsernameTaken_123: https://x.com/sentdefender/status/2031845360696479816 Oil tanker on fire [+20] u/J_da_CPA: 🥭 is good for the economy. He’s going to run the country like a business man. They said. [+20] u/CigInside: Genuinely how can anyone support Mang at this point. Likely pedo, moronic economic policy and just escalating foreign conflicts. Truly special stuff [+20] u/throwawaydonaldinho: Off hours WSB daily chat is the only time you can discuss positions with people for real. Market hours its just ber fuk bul fuk retardation. [+19] u/Aggravating-Buy-1695: Believe it or not, calls. [+19] u/Gom_KBull: # To think ALL of this could have been avoided # if he just left Iran the FUCK ALONE. [+19] u/PushAble2463: Did you sleep well tonight? Imma tell you who did not: The hawksbill turtles in the Persian Gulf. They are supposed to fuck on the island beaches right now, but I’m pretty sure it’s hard to get in the mood with all these bangs and fires. [+19] u/yeahyoubored: lmao imagining an Iranian drone hitting California….. what timeline is this that the FBI even has to give such a warning… [+19] u/Glock7enteen: My card just declined trying to buy a homeless dude a McChicken [+19] u/All_FIREdUp: >U.S. has a Russian folly and gets itself into a war of attrition against a well equipped enemy >U.S. tanks the global economy as a result >U.S. empties its oil reserves, pulls resources, and gets sucked into an entirely unnecessary war and resource vacuum >China sees the U.S. is at its weakest and takes Taiwan >Russia, full ports into Ukraine >Europe sends all resources to ward off Russia >NATO boots hit the ground >Welcome to World War III >Were you born in 1995 or later? Welcome to the front, soldier Why? Because Americans couldn’t stand her laugh. [+19] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: Starting a Board of Peace and a War is the ultimate straddle [+19] u/MagJack: did someone just die from embarassment [+19] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: Boe Jiden was 10x more entertaining to watch [+19] u/Sea-Refrigerator7919: He can literally say any lie and these retards cheer 😭 [+19] u/jonneh: Just saw footage of the two oil tankers struck by Iran in the Persian Gulf, both reportedly loaded with Iraqi oil. # The tankers are completely engulfed in flame and are leaking burning oil.. looks apocalyptic 😭 [+19] u/NeverDeltaNeutral: To think this nightmare was completely self inflicted. Mango 🥭 literally chose to fucking do this [+19] u/ProudPeak3570: it was fucking crazy that the market bought up the "war is complete" comments [+19] u/Disconn3cted: Iran says it's ready for a long war that would 'destroy' global economy Don't stop. I'm gonna cum [+19] u/HonestScar7176: I respect bear cause they at least trade on what’s actually happening in the world, while bull trade on hope that trump will say something or not do something as bad as they thought. [+19] u/Salty-Bid1597: He's literally an inverse Midas. A golden man who turns everything he touches to shit. [+19] u/Equivalent_Fly_5559: Taco setting up hegeseth to take the fall, ‘he told me to do it’ pretty clear he can smell this is going wrong. [+19] u/yyn1999: "VOTE VANCE 2028 TO END THE WAR IN IRAN" 🤡 [+19] u/ReftLight: One year ago, this guy here got super bitthurt when I told him 🥭 has no values and does whatever the next guy with a paycheck tells him to do. Guess what, I was right. Fuck you and your pedophile hero. [+19] u/DickiesDippinDicks: 🇺🇸: We’re going to use AI for analysis and target information Anthropic’s Claude: Check this out, definitely a target worthwhile, this information is 8 years old, trust me bro. I’m AI 🇺🇸: Strikes school 🤡 🤡 🤡 [+18] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: world: on fire economy: shambles markets: volatile hotel: TRIVAGO [+18] u/5StarMan94: I’m now into month two of my quick one day flip after buying the MSFT post earnings dip [+18] u/trent_upscale: Have you guys seen Ben Shapiro's eyebrows lately? [+18] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Tomorrow may finally be the circuit breaker WSB bers have been waiting for [+18] u/housemoneyrocketship: This administration is a dumpster fire [+18] u/Vegetable_Push6542: freak the fuck out and panic sell everything right now; it's fucking over - Warren Buffett [+18] u/ring_of_slattern: > Three ships in Strait of Hormuz hit by 'unknown projectiles' Must’ve been the wind [+18] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: JUST IN: 🇺🇸🇮🇷 US intelligence shows Iran's government is still intact and will not collapse anytime soon, Reuters reports. [+18] u/portfoliorating: # THINGS THEY TELL US AND WE BELIEVE (Part 3): \- INFLATION IS TRANSITORY \- EPSTEIN LIST IS A HOAX \- WAR WITH IRAN IS OVER SOON \- THE DOW IS OVER 50,000 [+18] u/emr1028: This whole week has reminded me of when I was on a work call with some wall street risk advisory firm and they insisted Russia wasn't going to really invade Ukraine. Wall Street is just allergic to thinking about geopolitical risk and they consistently underestimate it. [+18] u/darkspherei: pentagon blew 93 billy on steaks and king crab but can't intercept a shitty drone [+18] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Epstein isn't real he never was now watch this tomahawk [+18] u/Swiftnice: 🥭 has never been in a position where the other side won't let him TACO. He's gonna lose his mind. Lol [+18] u/OptionsHuduga: The wife got fired today from her job. She’s a housewife though lol [+18] u/ckami_91: Burrito $16. Starbucks coffee $7. Haircut $50 Dinner and drinks $100 🥱😴💤 $5 gasoline… 😱😱😱😱😱 LMAO [+18] u/ercanbas: Never seen anything like this in all my 5 days of trading oil. [+18] u/Early-Elderberry-150: So let me get this straight, a cap ass truth social post from 🥭 can send SPY soaring by 1%, but concrete evidence of long term global Oil and supply chain oil does fuck all? Make it make sense [+18] u/unhappyreach_: >Senior Iranian military official to USA: "If Washington makes a strategic mistake, another strait will be placed in a situation similar to the Strait of Hormuz." Source: Al Jazeera [+18] u/Val44x: Another oil tanker sustains catastrophic damage overnight and is now leaking oil into the strait. Iran refuses to allow and cleanup or dislodging of the destroyed vessel. Oil opens at 200 and SPY opens at 499. I love writing hyper erotic BER fanfics [+18] u/JayWhizz007: hegseth the fall guy on this one? looks like the lobster spend is the first sign? [+18] u/Overall-Fold-9720: >Oil hits $100 a barrel despite deal to release record amount of reserves Against all odds, releasing half the petroleum reserve after 2 weeks of war did not ease worries *shocked Pikachu face* [+18] u/Actual_Difference617: His 4 years are gonna age me 40 years. [+18] u/CarcossaYellowKing: Bought a couple USO $140 3/18 calls because the news is officially calling Hormuz closed. Already up 4% so obviously tonight Iran will announce they are sorry and now they love peace and cowboy films so it will plummet to a historic $10 a barrel. Sorry guys. [+18] u/aquaticsardonic: Trump will die some day. [+18] u/emr1028: To think, all 🥭 had to do was nothing. [+17] u/LarsTarkas: Iran introduces a new shahed drone fueled by the hatred of infidels. First targets are California In-N-Outs [+17] u/Mr_Compyuterhead: Donald learning in real time that he can’t chicken out from a war [+17] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: 🌮 doesn’t seem to understand that Iran isn’t trying to “win” militarily. Their goal is to ensure the cost of whatever success the US claims is so great, we’ll never fuck with them again [+17] u/OrdinaryMix4013: SCOOP: Barron trump shorted OIL before the Sec of Energy published the fake tweet. profited around $40 million dollars. [+17] u/hermeskino715: Holy shit. Remember last year, on Feb 28, was when 🥭 told Zelensky he's gambling with WW3? Fast forward to the exact same date, we bombed Iran. If some one can make an AI video with the roles reversed, that would be hilarious [+17] u/sloanemonroe: 🥭: “let’s attack Iran.” Military generals: “I don’t recommend that. They can cut off oil supplies and cause a worldwide depression.” 🥭 “I’m really smart. I’ll figure that out later.” [+17] u/KittyLover-7: Damn they did hit the school 😔 [+17] u/Big-News-2704: Dropped bombs for a week only to get a younger Ayatollah. Bruh 🤦‍♂️ [+17] u/looool_k_libtard: Made an onlyfans account where I just get fucked by the market every day [+17] u/ResidentPack4103: 🥭admin guarantees dems win everything the next 20 years Oh wait I said the same thing Jan 6 2020 [+17] u/infernalbunny98: "Trump Country" followed by a prayer makes me wanna vomit [+17] u/Unhappy_Hedgehog_808: I’ve watched plenty of these Trump press conferences but it’s also equally hilarious to “watch” it through reading the comments here. [+17] u/bearhunter429: #How is our 3-day-special-military-operation going? LMAO🤌 [+17] u/One_Impression_2253: full ported puts this week. bought calls at 3:58. anybody got an extra wendy’s application? [+17] u/McKoijion: > PENTAGON IS RECRUITING BANKERS FROM GOLDMAN SACHS AND JPMORGAN FOR A NEW "ECONOMIC DEFENSE UNIT," ACCORDING TO SEMAFOR. Lmao [+17] u/SoloOutdoor: Mango has the US financially fucked [+17] u/Independent_Wind1270: Just remember - some of you people wanted this market over sleepy joe [+17] u/Valkorion335786: Family in Dubai called me asking me how I’m doing with this Iran fallout Lmfao I’m supposed to be calling you [+17] u/penelope5674: Gas went up by 30% within a week at the pump. If they can’t figure out how to reopen the strait cpi will be through the roof. I forget how many rate cuts we priced in this year, 2? Newsflash it’s not happening [+17] u/Waiting4Reccession: He bankrupted the biggest bull market ever. -2% day tmmrw at this rate [+16] u/Better-Call-SauI: Iran: Do nothing, win [+16] u/DarkR124: Heads up - Whale loaded up on KRE calls around close. June 18 $69c - 52K (about $13.5M worth) and $73c - 78K (about $15.2M worth) Missed it in my daily unusual option volume scan at close. Will probably grab some tomorrow at open. Whoever grabbed those has got a lot of conviction (aka insider stuff I’m guessing). [+16] u/polodolo98: Here comes the real crash gents. Oil surging and private credit bubbles bursting. GG’s for a while 🫡 [+16] u/avdvetf: Iran has n o t h i n g t o l o s e we're fucked, they can continue this for years [+16] u/avdvetf: did 🥭 just think they would surrender after their 87 year old figurehead was assassinated [+16] u/borat_he_like_you: Iran said to get ready for $200/barrel oil I say OK because now I have a good excuse to stop driving & stay home all day wacking off lmao 🤣 😖😣😫 [+16] u/Ready-Tennis8577: Dude being online is gay [+16] u/All_FIREdUp: Iran grabbing the U.S. by the pussy 🫵😂 [+16] u/siouxu: The people yearn for economic collapse [+16] u/Entire-Flatworm-8498: I was in complete flow state today... Every trade I made was immediately profitable.. I exited at great times.. Made a shit ton... I should take tomorrow off and not trade because I know I'll lose my shirt otherwise [+16] u/ajibtunes: BREAKING: Iraq has shut down its oil port operations amid attacks on tankers [+16] u/Hwangoutpltr: 89% of cybertruck owners are actively using gas station dick pills [+16] u/pootenanner: Anyone looking at spy daily, weekly, monthly chart and still being bullish is purely regarded [+16] u/ThermalChaser: REUTERS: Diddy to release strategic reserves Thursday- sources [+16] u/VellyJanta: Israel will never want peace it finally got the USA into a fight with Iran again. War not gonna end soon, gonna get puts every time there’s talks of a ‘ceasefire’ [+16] u/Hang_Man1: Bottom aint in until we see the suicide hotline on wsb [+16] u/borkdpasito: Why the fuck would Iran make peace with 🥭 - he killed the leaders Dad, Wife and Son. US military doesn’t have the capability to win this war without crashing everything. Deluded if you aren’t long on oil [+16] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: Bers at night God damn right Bols by close Fuck dem hoes - Cash gang [+16] u/According-Page8618: CBS reports U.S. officials say there is no credible intelligence behind the FBI bulletin about a possible Iranian drone threat to the West Coast. Officials said the alert was based on an unverified, non-actionable tip that surfaced before the current conflict. glad we dropped -0,5% cause of that [+15] u/2020isgreat: Reports of an unknown oil tanker currently engulfed in flames off the coast of Basra in Southern Iraq. [+15] u/keagator: Aren’t the tankers in water? Why are they on fire!? 🤔 [+15] u/JuliusCaesar121: Trump is going to declare victory and leave after posting a deranged AI snuff film of the Ayatollah The nightmare scenario is that Iran taunts him and keeps blocking the strait of Hormuz. And if they still have thousands of $20K drones while the whole region is tapped out $4m patriot missiles......they will have everyone by the balls We are so fucking dumb tbh. Whoever thought this was a good idea belongs in Guantanamo [+15] u/jonneh: **10:34 PM ET** # # Brent crude has hit sessions highs at $100.10 [+15] u/Pretty_Ad_7885: And the gayest trading day goes to ...... today [+15] u/ResidentPack4103: Port flat this week...blood pressure through the fuckin roof Thanks Obama [+15] u/Abe2025: Oil storage tanks destroyed in Oman. Down we goooooo [+15] u/WSB-mods-are-: Goodbye portfolio #9 you were a real one 😢 [+15] u/rriggsco: Iran wanted to remind you that *The Strait is Closed for Business.* [+15] u/PinealTone: Time for the Fed to increase interest rates.. to suppress this inflation. [+15] u/SkoomaJunki3: “We won the war!” 5 minutes later: 2 oil tankers attacked & on fire, dozens rescued [+15] u/Personal-Boss-7111: US gonna lose another war after Iraq and Afghanistan. Embarrassing. [+15] u/McKoijion: Zionists only needed to prop up the market long enough to ensure Trump wouldn’t TACO out. Now that he’s fully committed, it’s time for the rug pull. [+15] u/Independent_Drop4317: Can’t believe we still have 3 more years of this nonsense [+15] u/gayforgoblin: Just let me hit $10mil and I swear I'll stop gambling [+15] u/solidsneeze: tanker captains in the strait now know how my average trading day feels [+15] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: The retards are in charge 😟 [+15] u/absolutxtr: 🥭: "The straits are in great shape.” no mention of the gheys though. [+15] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: 🥭... Get your shit under control. Fuck tard [+15] u/spellbreaker: **CRAMER** SAYS AI IS IN THE *SWEET SPOT* RIGHT NOW fucking fade it bro it's over [+15] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Metals and energy trading like shitcoins all while you have blatant insider trading like TTD CEO buying 200 million in shares the day before it pops 20%. Most corrupt market I've ever witnessed. [+15] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #LOW ENERGY Bro looks like he is about to fall sleep reading the telepromtor lmao [+15] u/baconography: Imagine if it was a Dem prez up there saying this incomprehensible drivel. SPY would be jerking down 10-dollar chunks every hour if there were no derivative market. [+15] u/Retaining-Wall: If a tanker hits a mine and oil goes through the roof, I will literally stick an entire pineapple up my ass. [+15] u/Ble_h: Holy shit his makeup looks like absolute shit today. [+15] u/BrokeDickRizz: Bro what is happening lol [+15] u/tesseramous: Not being able to trust a word the us president says is wild. Strange times. [+15] u/UsernameTaken_123: Dont worry, we won and Iran doesnt have a navy anymore *tanker blows up in background* Also all their missile launchers have been destroyed *air sirens going off in Tel Aviv* [+15] u/diskfreak3: War is not bullish You're welcome [+15] u/br0botic: Freak the fuck out and sell everything. It’s over [+15] u/Eur0stept: If you bought a car 20 years ago and filled it up with oil, you could now take that oil out and sell it for a 500% gain 😦 [+15] u/PompeiiSketches: There is no possible way that Iran could drone strike California. If that happens its 100% a false flag. [+15] u/Emilio___Molestevez: from a coaching perspective, blowing up a little girls school was probably the wrong way to get Iranians to buy in to the team concept [+15] u/Overall-Fold-9720: *oil goes up 20%+* *war in Iran* *Hormuz closed* 🥭: "tariffs 2.0" [+15] u/trumpdiego: ##Im going to wake up and buy the puts, then 15minutes in Mango going to tweet that he made a new deal with Supreme Leader Pooki Bear and it's over. Then we're going to find out 15minutes after my puts expire that Supreme Leader Pooki Bear was a prank caller and we're still at war. [+15] u/bearhunter429: #IBM currently has 5k job openings and 4k are in India. Only 300 are in the US. LMAO🤌 [+14] u/AgitatedJump8459: Yall need to buy into oil lol [+14] u/bearhunter429: #I can't remember the last time futures were THIS red LMAO🤌 [+14] u/MoreOutcome8541: 176 million barrels, what is this supposed to be, an oil supply relief for ants? [+14] u/Advanced_Structure21: 🥭 keeps telling us he's winning in Iran. That's good because losing to a country with 1/30th your GDP would be like managing a casino in Atlantic City and going bankrupt. [+14] u/Big-News-2704: 🥭 can't even Taco. Went too far. He fuk [+14] u/BagHoldersOfAmerica: Oil could go to $300 and US gov would still report 2.4% CPI [+14] u/Substantial_Ring9690: News from the White House: Iran wants to make a deal. It’s a very good deal. Marco likes the deal. I don’t know if we’re gonna take the deal. [+14] u/Own-Wolverine-5361: I went thru sexual harassment training. Now I'm certified to sexually harass 🫦 [+14] u/VirgillMastercard: BREAKING: 🥭has obtained weapons of mass portfolio destruction [+14] u/Appropriate_Sky_4509: Glad I pulled out the rest of my capital Gonna need that $13 [+14] u/Eddyrancid: I feel like Iran's alleged "aspirations" to strike California really misjudge how this admin would feel about a blue state getting pummeled [+14] u/LarryStink: > *CLIFFWATER $33 BLN PRIVATE CREDIT FUND Q1 REDEMPTIONS REACH 14% And Cliffwater is interval, meaning it is not permitted to impose gates [+14] u/im_burning_cookies: It’s crazy djt don’t drink because I swear every rally he has in small states sounds like a drunk uncle rambling in a garage.. guess that’s the angle [+14] u/Only-Comb-6283: What a waste of oxygen [+14] u/spyputs1: Someone fainted from the smell of his ass [+14] u/ThermalChaser: "Make America healthy" As folks pass out behind hin [+14] u/Killersax: Oil going up even after the release of reserves is concerning...we cooked 100% [+14] u/cannythecat: Oil going back up, bol in trouble [+14] u/orsomeshitidk: This Iran shit wild but doesn’t compare at all to when the black guy wore a tan suit. [+14] u/cannythecat: Futures concerning for bol [+14] u/Ill-Expression1737: https://preview.redd.it/a8oguevj4iog1.jpeg?width=1064&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1b07324cb19fa1dca495460eeb8c1a3d1b9850fc us tomorrow [+14] u/sierratangocharlie: hey wait you geniuses told me oil peaked [+14] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: honestly this sub is way more fun with chaotic and volatile markets [+14] u/colinr813: Reminder that spy went from 480 to 690 in 6 months for no particular reason [+14] u/throwingitanyway: BREAKING: President Trump signs executive order charging all oil long speculators and stock short sellers with berrorism, punishable by death. [+14] u/ThinkingOfTheOldDays: my new conspiracy is Iran war is a cover for private credit literally imploding as we speak [+14] u/_Doomer_Wojack_: Is the Hormuz strait or gay? [+14] u/Tay_Tay86: "Nice CPI report, it'd be a shame if a war happened to it" -an actual Reuters article This crash gonna be the worst kept secret. Everyone can see the shadows of a crisis. It's like being at the top of the roller coaster before the drop in [+14] u/TickTockTaudit: Oil transport companies are paying their insurance premiums and sending their oldest, rustiest ships and most annoying Captains. [+14] u/avdvetf: apparently 50% of people voted for 🥭 but I can't find a single 🥭 voter, they just vanished [+14] u/andytobbles: The wars almost over yet my good friend at life group who’s a chief master Sargent in the Air Force says they’re ramping up deployments in mass and tons of reservists are getting called out to the thick of it in the coming days. Boots on the ground in the coming weeks clock it. [+14] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Reports indicate that in September 2025, under Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth, the Pentagon spent $2 million on Alaskan king crab in a month. This was reported as the fifth time the Pentagon under the Trump administration had spent $2 million or more on king crab in a single month. [+14] u/Wowmuchrya: Just say boots on the ground and send SPY to 500 already. Stop the delays. [+14] u/Other_Sample_3709: We’re entering an economic depression. [+14] u/Raw-Garden: Let’s just drop 10% already and start a new bull market right after. Then both sides are happy. Why’s that so hard? [+14] u/brannock_: Lol I pissed off a bot poster so badly by recognizing that he's from India that he sent me a suicide awareness alert and blocked me Always the ones with hidden comment histories too [+14] u/strip_club_dj: I'll be honest guys, I think I miss Sleepy. [+14] u/BumbleSlob: Looking forward to seeing Uday and Qusay Trump on trial at the Nuremberg 2.0 [+14] u/Salty-Bid1597: China gonna come in soon and tell all these guys to turn the noise down or they don't get any iphones or rare earths for dinner. [+14] u/LostandConfused2024: The fact that trading is so accessible is a fact we take for granted. The fact you’d have to call your brokerage back in the day to make the trades for you is dog shit. But then again, I would be up so much because I’d have never been able to yolo options [+14] u/Violent_Mud_Butt: Futes recovering fully every single night sure is weird. [+14] u/PuzzledLeader8941: kim pls just end this 🫩🫩 [+14] u/Ornery_Intern_2084: 2 oil tankers on fire [+14] u/Ok_Environment_3618: Please be genuine: How many of you voted for 🌮 ? I was very happy when he won because of his fake promises. But, now I feel disgusted seeing what he has done in the past one year. I am afraid of imagining the next 3 years. Total corrupt govt along. They just nod what 🌮 says, or else they get fired. I think no one will vote for him in the midterms. Everyday some shit news. Can't even live peacefully. [+14] u/Mental-Weakness-567: Trump is dying to drop a nuke before he kicks the bucket [+14] u/abroadbroadband: I still chuckle when I think about the Cybertruck demo Yeah it's armored glass, throw this iron ball at it, go ahead 🔘 _shatters_ Let's try the rear window _shatters_ [+14] u/borat_he_like_you: I have a good feeling my future wife is right here on Wall Street Bets and I just want to tell her good night and I love you. [+14] u/Critical_Virus_9341: Keep pumping OIL Need my USO calls to print [+14] u/neverthy: Btw since this war started JD Vance disappeared [+14] u/moorhound: >AP News: North Korean leader Kim and his daughter try out new pistols at shooting range How the fuck is *North Korea* looking like the cool and sane country right now [+14] u/KanonBalls: Iran has around 350 km of coastline along the strait of hummus. It just needs a few shaeds hidden in some beach warehouse to sink a tanker. This can go on for a very long time... Honestly, what's the off route on this? Invading Iran's coast? Iran running out of cheap drones? Saudis and Emirates kicking out US embassies? None of that is gonna happen any time soon. The similarities to Putin's special military operation of 3 days are darn striking, and we know how that's going. [+14] u/FuckingJPMAlgos: We have reached the point where even the manipulators, hedgies and algos dont know where to take the market. Its like they are battling amongst themselves some want to go up and some want to go down. Cash gang until this fuckery is over. [+14] u/Far-Requirement9180: They are conditioning us so badly to believe this trading pattern as normal that it’s getting pretty scary now lol [+14] u/Les7X: Man I can't wait for mango to go fuck himself. I hope you ameritards don't fuck up at midterms because I can't stand two more years of this degeneracy [+14] u/pineapplekiwipen: market doesn't give a shit if you're a boy or a girl [+13] u/NewComplaint2065: i’m fucking dying laughing at all your comments about this shitshow [+13] u/spyputs1: Hey it’s the dude that got his ass whopped last year 😂 [+13] u/louis-debroglie: The single most important thing right now is the strait closure duration "The U.S. EIA (part of DOE) released its March 10, 2026 Short-Term Energy Outlook stating Brent crude will stay above $95/bbl short-term due to Middle East conflict, then fall below $80/bbl in Q3 2026 and average ~$70/bbl by year-end (4Q26)." **They're telling you not until Q3!** That means they're expecting a closure duration on the order of months, not weeks! Listen to what they are actually saying, not mango's "we already won" [+13] u/bearhunter429: #My company sending me on a business trip to somewhere called Hormoz Strait. Sounds exotic. Can't wait. LMAO🤌 [+13] u/9tacos: Trillion dollar war machine and we can’t control this little river 😱 [+13] u/portfoliorating: # tHe dOW iS aT 50,000 **FFS, JUST RELEASE THE FULL EPSTEIN LIST** [+13] u/fish_: guys all the accounts posting news about strait opening haven’t made comments for months before this, feels fake as fuck [+13] u/CreateDeprivation: Mango said on Tuesday the war might end soon and the market actually ate it up lmao as if war is a one sided conflict [+13] u/pmotiveforce: 🥭 has two wolves in him. One is a 🌮 and only cares about stonks and oil prices. The other is a weak boomer who grew up watching John Wayne and shit so cares a lot about seeming tough. This is the battle of the 🌮 and the fat beta with something to prove [+13] u/ModeForJoe: https://preview.redd.it/59fsibtw2hog1.png?width=2160&format=png&auto=webp&s=ea12d8f0d8ff09e8ca72155eb11af1f5b017f2d6 [+13] u/Fit-Marionberry5248: *Larry Ellison walks up to a restaurant* ”Can i get the name for the table reservation” *Bond. Junk Bond.* ”Alright Mr Bond, Michael Saylor is there already waiting for you!” [+13] u/AfraidAnalyst: Make a down payment on a house with that extra $1400 Right…. [+13] u/Mean_Bumblebee1945: Him constantly praising the stock market gains means the top is really in, and he knows whats coming. He wants to take the credits before its too late. [+13] u/dljmonkeyboiz: American retards no match for jihadist martyr retards ... there are levels to this retard game [+13] u/Jadeclone1: So if Iran survives for 60 days then they win? [+13] u/AcademicStandard3701: WHAM MOARE BAD NEWS!! [+13] u/cryptohorn: Imagine having an algo army to manipulate oil futes [+13] u/dontslambro: SPY is at the cliff edge. [+13] u/boris1869: Good job, Donnie. Always winning [+13] u/somewhere_cool: Oh so we're FUCKED fucked https://x.com/i/status/2031855909031346653 [+13] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: 🥭 is going to leave this earth after starting a war and continue to fuck us from hell lmao [+13] u/Afr0Karma: My puts gonna print tomorrow so hard if we keep this up. I might be able to afford gas [+13] u/Gom_KBull: # Oil shortage so bad, even SPY drillin for it. # ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭ ^(KEEN TOCKY) [+13] u/NYGiants181: This mother fucker is seriously going to destroy the world isn’t he. [+13] u/sl3azebag: seriously WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON [+13] u/aaapod: day 2 in france and can confirm they do NOT think we are the hottest country in the world. shocked! [+13] u/guy_cloutier: It's just 2 tankers. the fuel burning will help the others to navigate like in Die Hard 2 [+13] u/Fhyzikz: I stop by the newsstand every day, scan the front page, don’t buy the paper. One day the vendor asks what I'm up to. I say: “looking for an obituary.” Vendor says “those are towards the back of the paper, buddy.” I say: “not the one I’m looking for.” [+13] u/Initial_Ad_9250: Don't you think it's funny that the probability of a third world war rn is greater than you getting in a stable relationship or maybe even break even in your day trading account? [+13] u/TABid-5073: It's actually wild VIX was down to 22 this week like what the hell is that [+13] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Taco ain't taco-ing this time cause bibi keeps sending him photos of him blowing bubba [+13] u/Tay_Tay86: Manosphere can finally go be the warriors they've said they are. Enjoy Iran alphas [+13] u/SlartibartfastMcGee: So fucking sick of these small cap stocks that take an elevator to hell when the market has a red day. SPY is down .75% and these things gap down 4-5%. Luckily the weekly calls I sold are keeping me afloat, but fuck. What a shitshow. [+13] u/InsaneBallsack: Dude this timeline fucking sucks. Time to jack off [+13] u/OkResponsibility2470: At this point America feels less like a country and more like a stock where insiders set the rules and retail just provides liquidity [+13] u/GuyFieriFrostedTips: Jake Paul appears with 🥭 at rally, gets endorsement for an office he hasn’t even sought yet. It’s like the writers of life got bored and just mashed together two horrible, unrelated story lines into a non sensical 🎪 or 🤡 📺. This isn’t real life. [+13] u/McKoijion: > Following the development, at least two Indian tankers, the Pushpak and the Parimal, are reported to be passing safely through the strategically critical strait, even as vessels from the US, Europe, and Israel continue to face restrictions. https://www.msn.com/en-in/news/other/iran-allows-india-flagged-tankers-to-pass-through-strait-of-hormuz-after-jaishankar-s-intervention-report/ar-AA1YrTep Oh snap, that's how the Pushpak got through. [+13] u/type_error: I won’t be surprised if RFK says leaded gasoline is better for us and unleaded gasoline was a woke liberal agenda [+13] u/FuckleUp: God damn now being reported Iran was only two weeks away from Godzilla [+13] u/Guilty-Deer-2147: Mango's US military is like a CSGO Counter-Terrorist player. Thinks they've won because they killed the entire enemy team and then the bomb goes off and they lose the game lol [+13] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Our next president should be american-asian.. [+13] u/IDoLikeMyShishkebabs: You know you've been in a shitty market for a while when the bulls and bears start to both agree that this market is fucked [+13] u/Rohat19: have you said tanker once [+13] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: This is all a simulation btw and you're the main character. [+13] u/Brief_Introduction78: MASSIVE V from the old lady [+13] u/Eddyrancid: Jfc, I had blessedly forgotten Dr. Oz has an official role in gov't [+13] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: -3% QQQ red day tomorrow or I eat a piece of my shit jk i was gonna eat it anyway [+13] u/infernalbunny98: YMCA after these is so distopian [+13] u/JohanLiebert92: it's like this Strait chokepoint has given Iran a way to fuck anyone up, no matter big or small. crazy advantage when u ain't got nothing to lose [+13] u/avdvetf: massive ground invasion is the only way this ends thank goodness I'm canadian [+13] u/Quick1711: So, are we surprised that the Iranian government is pretty much intact and that they probably martyred their supreme leader ? Cuz I’m definitely not. [+13] u/jfwelll: Another private fund restricting withdrawl. Everythings fine I was told. [+13] u/Gom_KBull: # Update from AP >*WASHINGTON (AP) — Outdated intelligence likely led to the United States carrying out a deadly missile strike on* [*an elementary school in Iran*](https://apnews.com/article/iran-minab-girls-school-airstrike-us-israel-c3095dc9729881b567277a1c5c47efb2) *that killed over 165 people, many of them children, in the opening hours of the conflict, according to a U.S. official and a second person briefed on findings of a preliminary U.S military investigation into the incident.* >*The bombing of the school and its casualties involving children has become a focal point of the war, and if ultimately confirmed to be at the hands of the U.S., would also stand among the highest civilian casualty events caused by the American military operations in the last two decades.* >*President Donald Trump initially blamed Iran for the attack, later said he wasn’t certain who was to blame, and then said he would accept the results of the Pentagon’s investigation. The issue took on added urgency on Wednesday after the New York Times first reported that a preliminary investigation found that the U.S. was responsible.* [+13] u/2muchnet42day: They don't know the war is very complete. [+13] u/anonkraken: Posted a bullish comment to see how bearish you fucks are. You’re way too bearish. Calls. [+13] u/lipmanz: Oh look red futes how original [+13] u/Highway_Song: Whatever. It will recover overnight then we’ll have a 2% up day tomorrow for no reason. [+13] u/Ble_h: Taco is a fucking retard for starting this shit show. [+13] u/unhappyreach_: The Tylenol is hitting just right rn USD/JPY is in the danger zone. Last time it was in this range, the BOJ stepped in overnight and devalued the dollar to pump the yen. When the dollar started dumping, SPY hit ATH and all my puts were ruined, and my peener got soft Thank you for your attention to this matter [+13] u/Ready-Mycologist-840: Why would Aladdin do this to us? [+13] u/staburself321: The best moves happen overnight [+13] u/sonofalando: "So you burnt through $25B in 12 months?" "Yes, Dave" "And you gave your son $40B to bid for Warner Bros?" "That's right Dave" "But now you're firing 20% of Oracles global work force because of a 'cash crunch'" "Correct Dave” 🤡🤡🤡 [+13] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Who could have guessed FAFO worked both ways [+13] u/rbraalih: God this is beyond embarrassing [+13] u/Clackamas_river: You know there is more than 1 time zone. It is 10:47 on the west coast as I type. [+13] u/modder9: Those are called “micropenis trucks” or “gender affirming pickups” [+13] u/poozyfloor: Another thing that takes YEARS to ramp up. What a rube. [+12] u/drpa1n: Where do I go to pick up the oil I bought? [+12] u/Coogiez: Can we build a Biden and Obama counter [+12] u/BrokeDickRizz: bro what is going the fuck on. End me pls [+12] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Iran honestly got nothing else to lose.. you think blowing up a few more oil tankers and oil fields really gonna change the standard of living for that guy? probably not. Let me put this dorito in my mouf now. [+12] u/DeezSpicyNuts: You guys know in like 500 years the history books are going to say America destroyed the planet so fat people could have McDonalds and Beanie Babies right? [+12] u/jraiv420: TWO FOREIGN TANKERS CARRYING IRAQI FUEL OIL WERE SUBJECTED TO UNIDENTIFIED ATTACKS INSIDE TERRITORIAL WATERS, CAUSING THEM TO CATCH FIRE - IRAQI PORT OFFICIAL TO REUTERS [+12] u/abroadbroadband: And I'm proud to be a Panican Where at least I know I'm # REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE [+12] u/One_Impression_2253: “he sold his puts, blow up the tankers” [+12] u/Weak_Emu3659: You came to my house and you kicked my dog. [+12] u/Swiftnice: Does anyone else think Melania is just going to run through dozens of pools boys and have wild drug fueled parties with 🥭's money when he's gone? [+12] u/Overall-Fold-9720: >extreme market volatility of late 2008, where significant overnight losses in global markets or futures were frequently followed by intra-day rallies or government intervention-led recoveries They wouldn't use the same strategy twice, would they ? [+12] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Iran was gonna attack California with drones?! Gotta do a better job than that CIA guys. [+12] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: Thomas Massie is my favorite 🐘 because he's manngo's least favorite [+12] u/corndog_messiah: “There are a lot of dumb people who go to smart colleges. But I went to a smart college so I’m not dumb” - A regard [+12] u/Boring-Nectarine-311: what the fuck there are 4.2M degenerates on wsb [+12] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BESSENT trying so hard to not let oil break 90 [+12] u/Beneficial-Sail-6139: Warmongering Cramer what a piece of cunt … are you guys hearing this shit ? [+12] u/LeupMeisterGenral: Well oil futes it is then [+12] u/bearhunter429: #Futes DRILLIN just as I predicted LMAO🤌 [+12] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: Ending everyday cash.. holding nothing overnight [+12] u/Wowmuchrya: Your gas will be $6 at the pump this weekend while he wastes $500k in jet fuel flying back home to be terrible at golf for the 50th time in a year. Winning! Oh and then your portfolio will also be down. [+12] u/Inner_View1095: California will attack Iran. [+12] u/McKoijion: The 1970s oil crisis killed the American auto industry. Gas guzzling muscle cars were demolished by new fuel efficient Japanese imports. At least we got That 70s Show out of it. [+12] u/Overall-Fold-9720: After only 2 weeks with Iran, 🥭 about to release almost half our petroleum reserves LMAO, this shit better end fast, or you gonna have to find a bicycle [+12] u/Marshmallowmind2: Just give me a - 30% crash for gods sake That's all we are here for [+12] u/NVDAismyg0d: Oh baby they cannot wait to pump this shit tomorrow like usual [+12] u/dweeegs: > USTR Greer: US Initiating Section 301 Investigation Into 16 Trading Partners Including China, Eu, Mexico, Vietnam, India, And Japan lol are we really doing this right now [+12] u/B2BContinuum: This is God punishing us for all the fornication during the winter Olympics [+12] u/jokull1234: Oil futures realizing shit still sucks out here is so funny It should be higher but bulls are scared of a Trump -20% widowmaker again [+12] u/financiallythriving: Imagine buying the top of a 15 year artifical bull run [+12] u/Unh0lyCatf1sh: US releasing 172 million barrels from the strategic reserve, that should keep them going for about half a day [+12] u/somewhere_cool: USO short float over 50%, this squeeze will be legendary [+12] u/_LakeCity_: Netanyahu didn’t want the U.S. to leave the gulf, that’s why they’re bombing Iranian oil fields and desalination plants. It’s to keep the U.S. military there. This is *fucked* right now. [+12] u/HandsOnTheBible: The market gave you idiots a full freebie flat day to load up on puts while Iran was blowing up oil tankers and you bols didn’t take it LMAO. Now they’ve actually sunk ships and killed people in Iraqi waters. Wonder what will happen to the market tomorrow eh? [+12] u/burrowed_greentext: can tehran also announce that they mined the strait of carvana [+12] u/Val44x: SPY was 658 premarket Monday but then pumped $20. This time we get the real 655 open [+12] u/bearhunter429: #America bankrupt LMAO🤌 [+12] u/SaveTheAles: We can release half of our strategic oil reserve every day and never run out. Why are people freaking out. [+12] u/JuliusCaesar121: Iran **has** to give trump a horrible black eye or he and bibi will keep fucking with them every six months for the next three years. And oil could easily hit $200 if Iran keeps attacking energy infrastructure Maybe Xi will save us by stepping in and mediating. I need a communist to save my portfolio of extremely levered semiconductor bets What a fucking fiasco [+12] u/ThermalChaser: 🥭 going for total regime change just not over there [+12] u/Big_Cryptographer863: 🥭 announced 0% unemployment. [+12] u/Ble_h: Another red light therapy day tomorrow. [+12] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Brokerages should send out clown noses every time your option expires worthless [+12] u/WickedTwista: Oil rippin' Futures dippin' [+12] u/MasterElite1: You've tried inflation but have you tried global hyperinflation? [+12] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: they gona blame that school bombing on claude [+12] u/leestowncat: I think we owe Joe an apology. [+12] u/FuckleUp: I never imagined there’d be a time in my life where I’d be 💯 certain I couldn’t out drink the Secretary of War [+12] u/_dudehangsdong: Regards swinging calls during an unprecedented war with max uncertainty will never not be funny [+12] u/tommylol66: Idk how yall hold 1dte options with all this chaos [+12] u/Deadweight047: Jack Paul for president, interesting .... Logan as secretary of treasury Hawk Tuah girl as White house press secretary Cryptozoo as new world reserve currency [+12] u/Uisce-beatha: WaR iS BuLLisH foR tHe EcONoMy! But my personal favorite is how many of you keep falling for Taco's lies time after time after time. Push your head further into the sand while we keep printing money, go backwards in time on energy tech and spend all of our money lining the pockets of the already wealthy instead of public works projects. Perhaps build some more "data centers" to facilitate the bot armies spreading propaganda online and sowing division. Just don't ask too many questions about your yearly 15% increase on your energy bill. Surely this will be great for economy? [+12] u/BrownDog42069: remember how olds say that women are too emotional to be president?  so glad that didn’t happen [+12] u/Fit-Marionberry5248: There is no way this market is real life  We all died in 2020, didn’t we? [+12] u/Ornery_Intern_2084: Hes makin shit up while he stands there huh? [+12] u/OilBull: Latest Intel I have for you all is that Iran has placed tens of millions of dollars (USD) on Oil futures. They’re going to issue a statement restricting absolute access, driving Oil to their target of $200. I highly recommend you regards get CF or NTR if you’re too scared to get into oil at this price. Nitrogen > fertilizer > crops/beef/chicken/egg prices. They’re looking to destabilize us structurally. [+12] u/vermilli21: I thought we won guys? Aren’t you tired of winning? 🤡🤡🤡🤡 [+12] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Now would be a good time for deepseek to say the made v3 for $10 [+12] u/Swiftnice: It's amazing that SPY is only like 4% off it's all time high. Motherfucker is relentless lol [+12] u/Randomname1157: Oh the sky is falling. Oil tankers are on fire. Spy dips and the dip gets bought and it pumps for no reason like the war is over. [+12] u/Few_Egg3567: We won the war, but also we gotta win. [+12] u/ironexia: This honestly might be the catalyst to destroy the ai scam. [+12] u/CardiologistEqual336: 3 more years of this shet 🥰 [+12] u/hepukesyoudie: BRB I gotta keep an eye on this position that I cannot trade for 12 hours [+12] u/GreenGameboyColor: Goodnight, my handsome friends 😴 [+12] u/LouieM13: Iran gonna hire the whale from Moby Dick to sink the ships too [+12] u/AdCritical5383: Bol is the fuk. >!The ber also fuk.!< >!But new eye tolla is the most fuk.!< [+12] u/Beagle001: This think about California being threatened by drones is such a sad and obvious attempt to get the people behind this rat fuck of a disaster. He's going to talk about it today and how great America will be. Like we're being attacked or some crap. It's nauseating. [+12] u/pineapplekiwipen: space stocks probably double from here going into spacex ipo but also i might be highly regarded [+12] u/NewComplaint2065: never in my life have i seen a country’s leader be so aura-less [+12] u/callyograndma: Why do people frequently faint behind 🥭 [+12] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: IRANIAN EXPLOSIVE-LADEN BOATS HIT TWO FUEL TANKERS IN IRAQI WATERS, INITIAL INVESTIGATION FROM IRAQI SECURITY OFFICIALS SHOWS [+12] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Iran won't surrender because the last thing they want is the fucking bored of piece to do what they did to Gaza [+11] u/Contango_withme: My neighbor will be getting home soon… Getting my binoculars ready so I can peek at him and fantasize about hugging him and sniffing his neck while he grabs my ass. [+11] u/2020isgreat: Goldman executive says private markets clients ‘glad’ about Iran war ‘distraction’ ok maybe there might be a crisis... [+11] u/Hot-Pop-3250: This sucks. I'm not making money and I'm spending a bunch more on alcohol [+11] u/baconography: Forget about people who have studied Constitutional law, or political science, or have a proven record of military service. A YouTube celebrity boxer should run for office! What a time to be alive. [+11] u/QuartersToPlay: USO CALLS GONNA PRINT [+11] u/SnakeDoctor80: Futures just realized the war isn’t over yet 🤯 [+11] u/Fernyfern7: Please mango man do the most retarded thing and announce new tariffs. Let's really tank it [+11] u/weewoowewoooo: I hope gas hits $40/gal and everyone is forced to ride bicycles lmaoooo [+11] u/blumpkinspatch: I refuse to learn any lessons. [+11] u/SomePolack: Great time to brush up on Great Depression literature  Some of you will end up wandering the U.S. as hobos - might be kind of lit tbh [+11] u/NewDawn101: The mistake was not building more trains [+11] u/throwingitanyway: the market is only crashing because not enough of you thanked trump for the DOW hitting 50k for 3 days [+11] u/Big-News-2704: My portfolio blowing up like ships in the strait [+11] u/CardiologistEqual336: First week of Iran War cost us $11.3billion 👍 [+11] u/trumpdiego: ##ALIENS LAND ON EARTH AND DEMAND ACCESS TO ALL OF OUR NATURAL RESOURCES OR THEY WILL ELIMINATE HUMANITY ##SPY: +0.3% [+11] u/Get_dat_money: Fuck it I will clear the way, I played a fuck ton of minesweeper , I can save the oil [+11] u/JohanLiebert92: just put the oil in the barrel bro [+11] u/VellyJanta: Iran is mortal enemies with Israel and UAE, you really think Israel gonna settle with a peace talk when they finally roped America into war. This will go on for a while and I’m gonna try buying puts on regional ETFs the day the market spikes up on a ceasefire talk. [+11] u/noahmfs: It could be WW3 and the market will be bullish this is manipulation on a whole new level is like pedo lover runs the market itself. [+11] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Why is it so damn hard for this market to go down. When market goes up it goes straight up. When it goes down it has 10 different bounces and you have to figure out which one is the V. [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: Some of yall need to apologize to Barack Hussein Obama [+11] u/I_Own_A_Fedora_AMA: Lmao @ USA bonds, Asia, Europe, and Mideast stocks crashing while SPY drools on its helmet strap and pretends everything is fine [+11] u/LengthObjective2253: BREAKING NEWS: IRAN shot down PATH this evening. No survivors!! Condolences to their wife’s and their wife’s boyfriend [+11] u/Beneficial-Age-9293: 🥭 "Im in Cincinnati cause I just dont think Iran could get me here". [+11] u/unhappyreach_: I'm not scared of being in the range of the drones. if anything it will just give me a few extra minutes to buy puts before the news breaks [+11] u/Celticsmoneyline: best not to reveal your strike and expiry for Micron on here. The nerds at Jane Street are lurking [+11] u/Efficient-Macaroon66: I’m so fucking tired of winning [+11] u/Retaining-Wall: This is nearly incomprehensible. [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: TSLA price is unreal retardation levels [+11] u/LarsTarkas: I have gone to circuses with less clowns than this shit [+11] u/spyputs1: Market shitting it’s pants after this speech is just chefs kiss 😘🤌 [+11] u/Val44x: Monday Tuesday pump Wednesday sideways Thursday and Friday dump Last 3 weeks lmao [+11] u/Extreme_Green_1708: Me and my life partner are here in Iran to support the movement versus the USA. Gays for Iran! Update: we have been detained for some reason [+11] u/AirwickS: Breaking: Iranian missile strike damages my heavily diversified, safe 401(k) portfolio. Down $20k in two weeks. JFC. [+11] u/Glock7enteen: Everyone’s an atheist until futes start tanking [+11] u/borkdpasito: Bols praying for an unhinged 🥭 tweet [+11] u/Overall-Fold-9720: 11 billion dollars in 6 days, and we ain't even got boots on the ground yet Good we got the tariffs money *Ohhhh* [+11] u/cowboycookie1337: We most likely get some statement from the 🥭 admin tomorrow before market open to obfuscate price [+11] u/CasherburyTales: *Watching oil depot inferno in Middle East* Guys I think gas prices might be going up [+11] u/smart_doge: Yes, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I got here ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⠁⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠈⠙⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠁⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ [+11] u/Glock7enteen: How do I explain to my girlfriend we’re not taking the trip to Bahamas next week [+11] u/daisymoth9: even if 🥭wants to stop, israel doesn’t. and we know how that goes [+11] u/paralogistic: -1% futes means green by eod tomorrow [+11] u/NewDawn101: Horrible time to be living in a van [+11] u/keagator: I miss when people posted pictures. I don’t like reading [+11] u/Disconn3cted: Oil pumps when the Americans are asleep and drops when they wake up. That's the most manipulated shit ever [+11] u/2020isgreat: TY BESSENT FOR MANIPULATING THE MARKETS NEVER WOULD'VE GOT THIS ENTRY [+11] u/aaapod: she futed on my hormussy til i taco'd [+11] u/aaapod: at what point does another country invade DC to just get our leadership out?? i would be perfectly ok with this. SPY too. +9% day immediately. [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: feels like the country been on a low simmer for a minute. People are ready to freak tf out imo. I can’t believe when I was little I thought adults knew wtf they were doing. [+11] u/NVDAismyg0d: Fucking fly was on my leg for 30 seconds without me noticing. What could he have possibly be doing on my leg for that long. Disgusted [+11] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Put Erika in a fighter jet and prove her merits [+11] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: The oil gap up Monday morning will be legendary [+11] u/JohanLiebert92: how do I buy a Strait of Hormuz call option? destroying 3 tankers with no navy is some feat [+11] u/hiphopanonomos: Why doesn't Iran know how to make a nuke are they stupid or something? [+11] u/oatmeal-claypole: wtf is happening. it feels like something big is about to do down [+11] u/5uckmyd1ckb1t4: >Trump: "Operation Epic Fury: Is that a great name? Well, it's only good if you win. You know you can only do...and we've won. Let me tell you, we've won...You never like to say too early you won. We won. We won the bet. In the first hour it was over. But we won." [+11] u/borat_he_like_you: Hi Kristi Noem 👋 😘, we all know you're here on Reddit because you don't have a job or jack shit to do lmao. Come here and say hi just to me 😉 [+11] u/EducationalCicada: So Trump went into this Iran thing for a quick turnaround and he's now a Strait of Hormuz (SOH) bagholder. [+11] u/svpa3991: Someone tell 🥭 Hormuz is a young girl and watch how fast they open that strait up [+11] u/NiceJobSon: I forget do we (🇺🇸) own Greenland? [+11] u/Worth-Athlete-9953: THE WAR IS VERY MUCH COMPLETE MY ASS. [+11] u/looool_k_libtard: Going to wake up to Russell being -16%, Nasdaq -10% and SPY -14% [+11] u/hermeskino715: #669.69? ^(Screenshot) [+11] u/cowboycookie1337: Holy fuck bulls are actually done for, can’t TACO this [+11] u/KittyLover-7: First week of war cost 11 billion We could have used that 11 billion to spam market orders on spy instead to push it to 700 but all we’ve got is our dicks in our hands to show for it [+11] u/No_Skirt_4689: THE DOE IS WARNING THAT GAS PRICES AREN'T LIKELY TO COME BACK DOWN TO PRE-WAR LEVELS UNTIL MID-2027 AT THE EARLIEST Well if we didn't learn during the first supply chain shock this decade, we've got a second chance! [+11] u/McKoijion: It’s Iran vs. the world, and somehow Iran is winning lmao [+11] u/NaluknengBalong_0918: I feel a gheyness approaching… tomorrow, we dance! 💃💃💃🤣 [+11] u/Vegetable_Push6542: I give up. I'm ber but even I know we are going green today. [+11] u/Big-News-2704: When even the news anchors assume the government is lying with breaking news in real time, you know we're extra fukt [+11] u/2CommaNoob: I’ve been like Neo downloading all sorts on expertise over the last 3 weeks. I was an AI capex expert, then a Middle East conflict master, drone and missile cost benefit analyst, and now a tanker insurance actuary. What’s it going to be next week? [+11] u/pussinbuuts: $11b in one week OPERATION EPIC DEFICIT [+11] u/Diet_Water: Member when Trump said Covid would be over by easter, 2020? I Member... [+11] u/Ok-Poetry-4721: fuck this kangaroo market [+11] u/Ken_Blast: I dont like saying if Im short or long thinking algos will scrape the data to fuck my position [+11] u/Little_Top3815: Mangoland market is retarded comedy Fuck this shit [+11] u/zeren1ty: Ofc they bring oil right back down just in time for market open This administration is a 🎪 [+11] u/pineapplekiwipen: Celieve it or not, balls. [+11] u/2020isgreat: Did he just say Jake Paul wtf [+11] u/pootenanner: The market wanted to dump badly today. Every pump sold off on huge red candles. We get any bad Iran news tonight and it might be the big one kids. Hope everyone is hedged. [+11] u/14BrewMan: This man has no clue wtf is going on. [+11] u/bigmeatbag: Donnie gonna go grab her by the pussy to revive her. [+11] u/Haboubiii: Yahoo finance with an oopsie.. One could dream eh? https://preview.redd.it/sew7tohyghog1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ac80f68a0795e53a5af8da5a9fcdcd863d374530 [+11] u/bearhunter429: #Shit gonna CRASH hard tomorrow LMAO🤌 [+11] u/WSB-mods-are-: When you're having a cold one with the boys on the boat and your buddy is reeling in an oversized metal sea urchin 🍻 [+11] u/noahmfs: Spy -3 % tomorrow is not a meme anymore [+11] u/HonestScar7176: If spy opens lower than $665 I will let my wife’s boyfriend piss all over my face and in my asshole while I call him daddy. [+11] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: They’ve got drone boats hitting tankers hooo boy this thing is nowhere near over [+11] u/hiphopanonomos: Evening/night chat makes me want to go 100% SGOV. Daily chat makes me want to Yolo absolute retarded calls into prerevenue shitters [+11] u/NewDawn101: Worst ‘no war president’ ever [+11] u/modder9: US has lost every war in the past 50 years [+11] u/Overall-Fold-9720: 🥭 "It's over, we won, the operation is soon over" *gets an angry phone call from somewhere in the middle east* 🥭 "You don't want to say we won too early, we will stay until it's over" [+11] u/chikenbeer: 1pm: Done trading, all in on VOO 3pm: Full port into puts after youtube video on japan carry trade boomer neighbor: Up 500% on VOO for 30 years [+11] u/Early-Elderberry-150: Who knew that trading short dated options while high on vyvanse would lead to some of my greatest and worst moments in life [+11] u/AcademicStandard3701: Rent money on 0dte puts again!! [+11] u/NoBuyers: "[We don't want to leave early, do we, huh? We got to finish the job, right?](https://x.com/RapidResponse47/status/2031841565119754539)" Confirmed: the war is going to be won even more. See you next week. [+11] u/louis-debroglie: > AN INITIAL INVESTIGATION BY IRAQI SECURITY OFFICIALS INDICATES IRANIAN EXPLOSIVE-LADEN BOATS STRUCK TWO FUEL TANKERS IN IRAQI WATERS. If they can get explosive-laden boats close to tankers then make no mistake they are mining the strait right now... [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: There’s a lab in China one oopsie away from taking these gas prices right back down [+11] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: The irony is one could argue this conflict is very much a world war given the number of countries and global economy involved. [+11] u/Usedillusion7: Entire world on the edge of their seat for 🥭 to give a update on the progress of the ball room. [+11] u/BunsMcCheeks: his strategy of just blatantly lying about everything everyday is undefeated at this point. when you're ruling over a population of cattle I guess you can get away with it. [+11] u/Disconn3cted: I don't know what the fuck is going to happen but I know it's going to be bullshit [+11] u/Effective_Dog3089: "Six Hundred Forty new ETFs created first half this year -- averaging 3 per day" Shitty ETFs targeting hungry young males are the new garbage cryptocurrency. Create a ponzi ETF, dangle crazy high yields, collect fat management fees, and then pay the incels back their own money, as their shares bleed value. Easy recipe for success. Easy road to massive copium for the bloody bros. Exploit their greed. [+11] u/ResponsibleAnt8049: iran could play this shit like Napoleon played the Siege of Toulon, **by shelling the ships in the bay/at anchor, he forced an immediate total withdrawal.** [+11] u/stupidber: The dow is at 47,000! [+11] u/pootenanner: Oil moving back up. Spy moving back down. Name a better duo [+11] u/TheBurningTitan: Nukes could go off and we would be up by eod [+11] u/WarmCan3034: everyone is saying this is gonna be V, but literally my vibes r telling me TMR IS THE DAY it's over. (I also have been saying this everyday for the past 5 days) [+11] u/ismebbb: Bears celebrate overnight just for us to V by morning I've seen this movie before 😔 [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: I hope Iran doesn’t do something crazy like cyber attack my wife’s student loans [+10] u/No-Improvement3164: Mango 🥭 main reason to be POUS is to get rich. His voters getting more poor than they were. 😂 [+10] u/TyroneSwoopes: Funny you bulls believed mango when he said the war was very complete. What’s Netanyahu saying? Cause he’s the authoritative voice in this situation. [+10] u/PropheticMurmurs: One retard can post one DD about HGRIFT, and suddenly thousands of mongos who have never even heard of graphene are lifetime bagholders. [+10] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: MY FAVORITE WORD 👄 📉 [+10] u/ChampagnePapi-: Hes gonna get his ass blown open in the midterms [+10] u/ChampagnePapi-: Everyone’s busy looking at the futures, but has anyone looked at the pasts? [+10] u/get_da_maney: They fighting to keep it below 90 lmfao [+10] u/noahmfs: All tankers will be halted and that is going to be very bad for the market [+10] u/TheKiMoChi2020: Guess time to short oil again lol [+10] u/StonksInvesteur: Thursday’s crash will be glorious [+10] u/avdvetf: iran has nothing to lose, this will continue for years only way this ends is a massive ground invasion [+10] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Out of everything this was genuinely the most consequentially fucking retarded lack of foresight that will be the legacy of this admin [+10] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: Imagine being a lifetime macro trader and getting hired by the government to use an unlimited margin account to suppress the price of oil Shit must be electric [+10] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Iran asking for reparation and damages ? LMAO, we can't even balance a budget, wtf they expecting [+10] u/CumomEileen: It’s one barrel of oil, Michael. What could it cost, $100? [+10] u/FullCopy: There is no such thing as “just the tip” in Middle East wars. - Confucius - 6,500 BCE [+10] u/KindlyTie6602: Sleeper cells in California! Everyone Freak the fuck out! [+10] u/LostandConfused2024: Just made a royal fuck up at work. Fuck my life [+10] u/2020isgreat: Government workers asleep no one to short oil [+10] u/EpiphyticOrchid8927: Crude oil up to $100 lmao Trump just forced G7 to empty petroleum reserves for Putin so they're force to give back market share. Christ trump needs to go US is undergoing extreme reputational damage if they do not go for regime change in Iran [+10] u/bearhunter429: #Futes when green: +0.17% #Futes when red: -1.78% #LMAO🤌 [+10] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: # I FREAKED THE FUCK OUT AND SOLD ITS OVER [+10] u/modder9: The chuds who willingly enlist will be the first to be sacrificed for oil prices o7. [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: *SOURCES SAY TACO IS SHITTING HIS PANTS RIGHT NOW BC IRAN DIDNT FOLD AS FAST AS VENEZUELA [+10] u/Guilty-Deer-2147: Don't worry, you'll be dead in 20-50 years when the ocean acidifies and the planet gets roasted by the sun. Just yolo every single day since you aren't retiring. [+10] u/throwawaydonaldinho: Guys Im starting to think 200$ a barrel might not be a joke… [+10] u/mousepop321: I watch those clips of prisons where someone gets jumped or shanked and I panic about how that could be me but then I realize it’s very easy to prevent going to prison [+10] u/SlickyTrader: All in puts tomorrow, I’m going out swinging [+10] u/Initial_Ad_9250: I miss them COVID era circuit breakers. [+10] u/MasterpiecePurple302: I made $105.48 today AMA [+10] u/CaaCCeo: 5k 675puts for tomorrow 🙏 [+10] u/puffinnbluffin: Shut the fuck up you weirdo [+10] u/corndog_messiah: 🥭 May not be the brightest but you have to admit he’s good at surrounding himself with even bigger idiots [+10] u/fish_: is oil gonna make me rich?  stay tuned [+10] u/Boring-Nectarine-311: was this speech really enough to move billions into oil futures????? [+10] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: It’s because two tankers just got blown up [+10] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Limit DOWN tomorrow Freak the fuck out and sell everything it's fucking over [+10] u/betaforever: Long Oil & Short SPY or die trying [+10] u/smart_doge: I had $750k in cash in December and I used that to purchase a house instead of stocks. How am I doing? [+10] u/Deadsea3132: Didn’t 🥭 say the war is over and that the US would cover anyone trying to go through the strait 💀 how will anyone believe us ever again [+10] u/borkdpasito: 2 Iraqi tankers are on fire per Al Jazeera Oil 🚀 [+10] u/BarbellPadawan: I only need to consistently make 5 thousand dollars per day in crude oil futes for the next month and a half to recover my recent loss. 2.5 days in and I’m already outpacing goal. AMA [+10] u/skychief99: People acting like the market is crashing. S&P is only 227 points off its ATH. The dump has yet to begin. Long way down to go boy. Really long. Challenger Deep territory. [+10] u/Effective_Dog3089: Fuck my chud incel gooned out life. [+10] u/Jadeclone1: These trump years will make everyone lose their hair. HIMS long [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: as for me, i like high oil prices. I am ride the bus to work LMAOOO i would like to see the retards who drive F350s and stupid ass lifted trucks feel some fucking pain. [+10] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: dad borrowed my trimmer but returned it back with the same beard he left with??? [+10] u/AegonTheMeh: > Pentagon is recruiting bankers from Goldman Sachs and JPMorgan for a new "Economic Defense Unit," according to Semafor. Plunge protection team hiring https://www.semafor.com/article/03/11/2026/pentagon-headhunting-goldman-jpmorgan-bankers-for-economic-defense-unit [+10] u/Better-Call-SauI: US lost the war lmao [+10] u/Independent_Drop4317: Can someone from Boston start the tea party so we can abolish taxes without proper representation? [+10] u/dont_downvote_SPECIL: I can't fight in World War 3. I have a 217 gallon saltwater aquarium. Someone needs to look after it [+10] u/GoldenAries4: This is like the 4th night in a row where I’ve seen the “-2% tomorrow” “crash incoming” pure doom crowd. Maybe you guys will finally be right if you keep it up for a few years. [+10] u/Thebaxxxx: Way too many people in here at 1am go to bed 😠 [+10] u/jmc774: Is 🥭 doing blackface? [+10] u/bodymindtrader: #CIRCUIT BREAKER A REAL POSSIBILITY [+10] u/Coogiez: War is over officially two days ago [+10] u/Val44x: GIVE US THE REAL SPY 655 OPEN THIS TIME [+10] u/smart_doge: Those oil wankers are on fire 🔥 [+10] u/cowboycookie1337: It’s easy to TACO with tariffs because he has full control over that, he cannot just TACO when other foreign players are at the table because they can do whatever the fuck they want. [+10] u/DonDiabloTheGreat: CNN’s nonstop Israel d-riding is crazy, bro. Like when is America gonna defund their asses [+10] u/Ok_Complaint_3589: #Now war is almost over, pretty much over, really really over, definitely may be over ain't gonna work BS [+10] u/NewDawn101: Like 2 weeks ago oil was $60, inflation was almost gonne and rate cuts were gonna gives us a bull market [+10] u/NewDawn101: Our only hope is the Board of Peace [+10] u/Templar_Swamp_Stake: I’m gonna reserve judgement on this whole situation until someone explains to me what the fuck we’re fighting about [+10] u/Gom_KBull: Give me a cool 650 put the fear of god back in bol an00s [+10] u/UsernameTaken_123: Baby oil futures mooning [+10] u/Austin_Destroyer: Oh look, big moves in AH that make me wish I held my puts longer. I'd be upset if this hadn't happened like 100% of the time. [+10] u/KingRegardothe2nd: >50% of global urea exports and global sulfur exports originate from countries west of the Strait and transit through the Strait of Hormuz, Tend to be needed for growing food. [+10] u/jsie-iaiqhsi816278: $200 a barrel ?? easy anything for our troops god bless america and god bless our boys fighting for SPY 1000 EOY [+10] u/Ceyenne18: what a joke ... the only oil tankers moving freely are Iranian tankers going to China. so much for winning. [+10] u/Thotmas01: Forget this watching futes shit. I’m going to the Golden Arches and trying the product. [+10] u/borat_he_like_you: I refuse to serve in the War in Iran until they legalize prostitution on all U.S. military bases and I get a daily prostitute stipend so I can fuck all the hoes I want while my fat ass gets chased by Shahed drones [+10] u/swift2931: I’m tired of winning [+10] u/AegonTheMeh: Brent crude back at 100 a couple hours after the reserves release announcement which was meant to stabilize prices Tears in my eyes man [+10] u/SchwiftySchwifferson: My lil SPY 663P 1DTE gonna be pulling its weight tomorrow [+10] u/SkylarB02: This markets on its death bed [+10] u/RockasaurusRex: Have we considered killing them with kindness? [+10] u/dankeyschon: It's crazy how Israel could have just let Iran get some nukes and they wouldn't be getting bombed right now. [+10] u/LeupMeisterGenral: Path just trolling we goo [+10] u/Beagle001: People that think that Iran will somehow send drones over to California need to go back to community college and finish out their first semester. Wtf is even going on. [+10] u/financiallythriving: Imagine being in the deep red from option trading but still continue to trade thinking you will come back [+10] u/SomePolack: The global economy is about to crash and you’re just ….buying calls? [+10] u/McKoijion: Israel benefits from a longer war. Iran benefits from a longer war. The US loses, but Trump can’t back out now. [+10] u/Time_Independence355: of course I sold my puts today. fck. [+10] u/KittyLover-7: What’s the news AH? Didn’t pay much attention today, was it just a theta fuck fest? [+10] u/isolated-cat: I wouldn't be surprised to see rate hikes back on the menu after this shitshow is over [+10] u/stupidber: She said take me somewhere expensive for dinner so I brought her to a gas station [+10] u/DragonFruit-_-777: Bears love futes, Bulls like market hours, both are fcked either way [+10] u/Who_is_Your_Zaddy: Sir, another red dildo has hit SPY [+10] u/JayRoo83: Oil at $100 is going to feel like the salad days when it's $200 in a week [+10] u/sonofalando: Missing sleepy joever right about now. [+10] u/Soffatjockis: Straight of Homoz is the proof that there is no god. Or that god is gay. [+10] u/North-bound: I don't mean to brag but I ended up 0.01% on the day 😎 [+10] u/jazzgrackle: Here’s a tip, stay in school! [+10] u/JoyLimbPrivateHldgs: The show will go on but this a good time to remember what this sub is all about: the friends and karma we made along the way [+10] u/FuckleUp: Curse of the Dinosaur burial grounds [+10] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: been using nicotine since 2012...7 years pure Cope/Skoal dip, then 7 years Zyn/Velo, etc...been clean for 8 days now. I believe the first 72 hours are the worst. I think I'm cured for now [+10] u/gainsusmaximus: Bro Iran crashing out on oil tankers is such a bitch move [+10] u/Sick0h: Bruh, we’ve had boats with wheels for decades. Throw some thick ass tires on those tankers and a big ole hemi in the back and let em roll coal across Saudi Arabia to avoid the strait. [+10] u/WarmCan3034: He’s still alive u psycho [+10] u/Better-Call-SauI: Iran has US on a chokehold with Hormuz, they can just keep it closed even for years and watch as US goes to deep recession. [+10] u/Diligent_Onion_5149: https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-03-12/two-tankers-attacked-in-iraqi-waters-oil-ports-suspended Two tankers attacked in Iraqi waters. [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: *SOURCES SAY THE EPSTEIN FILES WERE ONBOARD THE TANKERS ON FIRE [+10] u/svpa3991: So Iran lets India through on promises of $500 gift cards [+10] u/Anonymustafar: The scary part about this is, escalation is almost required at this point [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #holy fuck. ima take a pic of oil surge with my disposable kodak [+10] u/smart_doge: Hey gurl, are you mine? Coz I’d like you get laid into strait of Hormuz [+10] u/leshermes: 🥭 : "wAr iS veRy cOmpLeTe" 🤡 [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: *SOURCES SAY THE ATTACK ON IRAN HAS UNIFIED THE COUNTRY MORE THAN EVER OPPOSITE OF WHAT US OFFICIALS WERE EXPECTING - WAPO [+10] u/-TrueFacts-: I just defeated a Russian in online chess.... I feel like I've done my part in the war effort 😛 [+10] u/Own-Wolverine-5361: Iranians don't even like Iran [+10] u/betaforever: Why don't they ask AI how to reopen the Hormuz? [+10] u/Equivalent-Train-906: lol the easiest way to beat the US in a war is to make the stock market go down [+10] u/unhappyreach_: Just as my Tylenol predicted [+10] u/jonneh: **Reporter**: You just said it was an excursion then you said it was a war so which one is it? # 🥭: Well, it’s both. [+10] u/Yogurt_Up_My_Nose: reddit servers suckin dick harder than WSB [+10] u/Better-Call-SauI: Iran: ''Do nothing, win 🗿'' [+10] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: > Iranian President Masoud Pezeshkian outlines three conditions to end the war: recognition of Tehran’s legitimate rights, payment of reparations and firm international guarantees against future aggression. When will taco deliver? [+10] u/Razvanell95: my account has been very Aladeen this week [+10] u/sailorsmile: Yall really do get more retarded in here the later it is [+9] u/stupidber: What are we watchin? [+9] u/imonkaS: All these oil profits going straight to the gas tank [+9] u/GrandKnew: "you guys mind if I listen to the worst fucking music of all time on my phone speaker" -my colleague in front of our clients [+9] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Lol like if iran attacks an major cities it would just be a random wednesday for most cities [+9] u/rbraalih: White house YouTube has paused coverage [+9] u/potato111a: WOAH WOAH WHAT OIL DOING [+9] u/yyn1999: If you didnt Long oil in this Dip you deserve to be poor [+9] u/FineJuggernaut3295: Guys I think the war might not be over [+9] u/No-Improvement3164: We are trading against an Orange 🍊 Regard and computers that move in nanoseconds. You have better chance of getting across a 12 lane freeway blindfolded 👨‍🦯‍➡️ [+9] u/FuckleUp: Current big wars: 🇺🇸 🇮🇱 v 🇮🇷 🇺🇦 v Russia 🇷🇺 Pakistan 🇵🇰 v Afghanistan 🇦🇫 Bol 🐂 v ber 🐻 [+9] u/moorhound: I live in California. Kinda wanna go fly my DJI Mini 2 while blaring "Tunak Tunak Tun" to freak the neighbors out [+9] u/randomnameforme123: OilBols are going to be rugged twice in one week This is just as bad as the SLV incident [+9] u/Valkorion335786: **ALABAMA MAN IS PISSED THAT THE LAWYER HE HIRED TO REPRESENT HIM HAD WARRANTS AND WENT TO JAIL WITH HIM** Lmao imagine walking into court with a lawyer and leaving with a cell mate [+9] u/Gom_KBull: All of you goons were so tunnel-visioned on the war that you completely ignored the real catalyst: The tree frog population fell by 1%. Sell Everything. Its fucking over. # ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭ ^(KEEN TOCKY) u/Harp-Note [+9] u/SomePolack: I genuinely think most of you have a better understanding of this war than 🥭 [+9] u/KittyLover-7: Many will look back at pam bondi 50k dow being the top But real ones know custom emojis being taken away is when it popped [+9] u/CardiologistEqual336: War is complete..ly just getting started 🤡 [+9] u/2020isgreat: Bols are about to hop on a tanker and cross the strait themselves [+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Iraq has cut off oil production. 400C [+9] u/SilverPrivateer: "Last one through the Strait is gay", says Trump, urging tankers to "stop being little bitches and just deliver the oil already" [+9] u/Micheal_Hancho: OUR BOMBS WERE JUST STANDING THERE MINDING THEIR OWN BUSINESS. NOT DOING NOTHIN. AND THEN HERE COMES IRAN AND RUNS RIGHT INTO THEM. VERY UNFAIR AND NOT OUR FAULT. [+9] u/portfoliorating: # I AM CALLING IN SICK TOMORROW, THIS MARKET MAKES ME SICK 🤮🤮🤮 [+9] u/nyse25: Believe it or not, green by open [+9] u/2020isgreat: Massive fires continue to burn into the night at the Port of Salalah in Oman, with the blaze caused by Wednesday’s drone attack against the port by Iran having now spread to most if not all oil tanks at the MINA Petroleum Facility. [+9] u/spyputs1: Is there gonna be anyone under 60 to get on the mic tonight? [+9] u/cowboycookie1337: I FUCKING WAS GONNA LONG OIL AND WENT WITH AVGO FUCK MY CHUD LIFE [+9] u/pootenanner: Oil ripping bol tits off. Over 92 now [+9] u/One_Impression_2253: i hope the bers will take me back 😔 [+9] u/MagJack: i bet the market does some weird things at 2am and recovers before most people wake up. might set some crazy overnight buy orders [+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: 20% of the oil for the entire world isn't moving and bulls are wondering why we aren't at all time high [+9] u/xyphrrrrr: If war is bullish then why the fuck is my portfolio blood red??? Please help [+9] u/RoyalFail6: Now watch this drive. ⛳️🏌🏻 [+9] u/FormalCompetition118: Grab his dick and twist it [+9] u/IHadTacosYesterday: I almost went to Panera Bread today and spent 18 something on a freaking pick 2 combo. It would have actually cost $13.85 or something after my coupon, but even then I felt it was too damn much. Instead I ate a big bowl of oatmeal with some peanut butter dollops on it [+9] u/tcmart14: How the fuck am I supposed to buy high and sell low on oil when it keeps going up? Someone get the new Supreme Leader on the phone. [+9] u/FuckleUp: How many oil barrels 🛢️ can a jet ski carry? I’m solution oriented [+9] u/Fine_Specialists: Bulls are in need of a pump [+9] u/BarbellPadawan: Current buzzword is “Straight of Hormuz.” Remember when it was “transitory?” [+9] u/Pax19: There's no way today's also a green day... right? [+9] u/RockasaurusRex: That petri dish of brain cells they taught to play Doom might legit be smarter than 🥭. [+9] u/puffinnbluffin: Does anyone want my ex?.. She fucks like a maniac but will ruin your life [+9] u/Val44x: LAST TIME OIL WENT OVER 100 WE PUMPED $20 BC WAR WAS PRETTY MUCH OVER LMAO [+9] u/Sharp-Direction-6894: Iranian drone show coming soon to California. [+9] u/PutSpreadDaddi69: As vix dies options just gonna get killed [+9] u/One_Impression_2253: bro, not another skyrizi commercial [+9] u/chikenbeer: In the words of Scam Altman : "We'll just ask AI how to make money" [+9] u/MoreOutcome8541: If we are green when we wake up tomorrow I swear I’ll… probably just come here and get rage baited by bols again [+9] u/decjr06: Majority of the trump administration currently residing on military bases.... If that's not a clear sign to buy puts idk what is [+9] u/Iknowyougotsole: The night is dark and full of Diddys [+9] u/x3i4n: grab ormuz by the bussy [+9] u/Juic3-d: Every since i stopped full porting 0 DTEs life has been great. [+9] u/Valkorion335786: I love how he has a pin of himself [+9] u/bigmeatbag: Did an Iranian sleeper cell miss Donnie and take out the old lady instead? [+9] u/Garbage-Disposal-938: This Kentucky dude is the new low energy Jeb [+9] u/AlmightyCheesusCrust: I wonder how many of those people in the background are blood related [+9] u/borkdpasito: Oil back to $100 today. Game over bols [+9] u/PlanSeekX01: Did yall see that oman attack sheesh [+9] u/DickiesDippinDicks: Yesterday: Uh oh I feel a little throat tickle Today: Fucken dying [+9] u/Me-Regarded: The only good thing about being old is I won't be drafted. Sorry kids, us Boomers win again [+9] u/LouieM13: The Bulls shall know pain [+9] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Of course the gap down happens when I have like 3 puts. [+9] u/jmc774: Maybe putting an alcoholic frat boy news anchor in charge of our military was not the move [+9] u/OftenOlives: Don't worry guys I think 3 or 4 more record breaking releases from strategic oil reserves that are already depleted, and that can't even be actualized in time logistically, will solve this problem. *another ship explosion in the background* Iran doesn't even have a Navy anymore, any ship that doesn't transit the strait is a pussy. [+9] u/CallsOrPutsYES: #Tomorrow I either get rich or end up with millions of barrels of oil that I need to then Transport through the strait of Hormuz. [+9] u/daisymoth9: just paid 4.35 for gas. and there’s a massive lifted truck behind me. sucks for him [+9] u/CardiologistEqual336: 🥭 gonna blame biden for this war [+9] u/smellyfingernail: Fck I just realized the war isn’t over despite 🥭 saying it was over on Monday. I need to sell everything! [+9] u/Walking72: Exclusive: US intelligence says Iran government is not at risk of collapse, say sources [+9] u/NOLandsMan7: Unlike bombing a bunch of school children? [+9] u/br0botic: Airports asking the general public for donations for TSA agents while their actual employer, the federal government, can’t be assed to pay them bc they’re too busy playing games is crazy work [+9] u/bearhunter429: #I've been watching futures religiously every night for the last 20 years and never seen them green. Not even once. LMAO🤌 [+9] u/Usedillusion7: Is Lindsay Graham just like asexual or some shit. I just can't believe one of his pool boys hasn't outted him yet if he really is gay and there's no way dude could possibly be into women. [+9] u/Ancient_Let7878: I’m new here but I’m learning quickly that no one knows anything about anything and it is all just a simulation. [+9] u/BarbellPadawan: >The energy market is actually fucked. -Bloomberg [+9] u/Guilty-Deer-2147: Crazy how China is getting pretty much everything it wants out of the crisis without a single open threat or firing a single shot. That's real power right there. Or many it's just a gentleman's agreement between everyone to prevent a total global financial and inflationary crisis because they're the world's manufacturing hub and exporter. [+9] u/Thebaxxxx: There is.. yes.. something far more regarded than even the most heavily levied futes. > We try not to speak of it too openly, lest it take yet another in its bipolar embrace > **Betting on Tennis matches** i have turned 30 to 900 and 5000 to 0 within the span of 3 matches. Oh and the best part? I know fuck all about tennis. [+9] u/Secure_Dog3810: futures are unironically ripping again lmfao [+9] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: US is getting clapped and 🥭 is covering it up [+9] u/Brief_Carpenter_7457: Bidens ghost gonna come back for trump [+9] u/jonneh: Crude oil futes opening higher right now > Two foreign tankers carrying Iraqi fuel oil were subjected to unidentified attacks inside territorial waters, causing them to catch fire - Iraqi port official to Reuters [+9] u/Val44x: BER BROS THIS WEEK HAS BEEN BRUTAL IM BARELY HANGING IN THERE DEPLOY ALL BER MINES!!! [+9] u/Retaining-Wall: Jpow tweets "oh fuck." Spy $12.00. [+9] u/cryptohorn: Bondi 50k comment was exactly a month ago today BTW [+9] u/otimanob: [Iran war was never about iran.](https://youtu.be/-3jFsdHNSfA?si=BTR6FQZxGhzsTx1H) [+9] u/Difficult-Level7038: Hey look oil is going to moon overnight again but will be under 80 at open lol [+9] u/No_Arm_6582: Well, it’s official, my money market account is well outperforming my VOO. Hell, actually the cash I keep in my wallet is outperforming it as well [+9] u/Marshmallowmind2: Gonna be a long messy war [+9] u/Eddyrancid: Medication prices slashed 700%, you can't afford NOT to get a prescription [+9] u/jda823: Hambre died for this [+9] u/jonneh: Shrek candle on oil futes 👀😳 # CL futes up nearly 4% # USO ripping up nearly 3.5% [+9] u/Wowmuchrya: Wait why is crude going up and why is he signing EO’s for oil rigs if the war is over and he declared victory on temu twitter 2 days ago? Is Iran not subscribed and following wtf? [+9] u/bearhunter429: #Stocks are made in a building called "New York Stock Exchange" by stock workers LMAO🤌 [+9] u/pootenanner: Looks like Americans are finally starting to panic lol [+9] u/bearhunter429: #When he said we won the war it made me think of Bush's "mission accomplished" speech LMAO🤌 [+9] u/ZealousidealSector19: I jumped back into the market today. I'm now down $4500 :/ [+9] u/TechnologyEven6926: MORE MOVEMENT AFTER HOURS THAN LAST TWO DAYS IN CASH SESSION [+9] u/TransformersScorge: “War is going to end soon”, “" Navy safeguarding oil containers through Hormuz”, fuck off. Iran blasting every oil container passing through hormuz [+9] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BREAKING: BESSENT DID NOT REALIZE HEGSETH HAD BOUGHT THE NAVY ESCORTS AND HAS APOLOGIZED FOR HIS MARKET MOVING TWEET. [+9] u/2020isgreat: REALITY VS THE TREASURY ROUND 2 [+9] u/lostinspacs: Iran has 90 million people and it’s probably going to be a failed state soon. Fuck [+9] u/Valkorion335786: Me: *Spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You've become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there's literally a sink right next to you. [+9] u/bigmeatbag: Y'all see Donnie taking questions just now at dusk? Dude looked as brown as Obama if not darker. [+9] u/noaholic: Everyday this shit, ffs [+9] u/barkwoofgrrr: 🥭 ruined House of Cards even more than Kevin Spacey diddling people. I can no longer believe there is any strategy or competency in Washington [+9] u/-TrueFacts-: Ever notice how anyone who uses the "free and confidential" Employee Assistance Program (EAP) at work tends to lose their job very soon after LMAO 🤔 [+9] u/PositiveEdge4361: Trading oil is kinda gay [+9] u/sonofalando: My wife said “we’re going to see people putting gasoline in shopping bags again” 😂 [+9] u/Disconn3cted: After a big market loss, does anyone else jack off relentlessly to get some dopamine to feel better? [+9] u/DCrebuilds: Guys I don't think the war is over [+9] u/RockasaurusRex: The government wants to see my ID before I can access PornHub so I sent them a picture of my ID. My Immense Dick. [+9] u/Illimited_Esoterica: Iranian president announces one of the conditions for peace is that the US and Israel must pay reparations per Al Jazeera. Boys, I don't think this is ending soon. [+9] u/BeltRevolutionary264: Sorry bols, Europoors just woke up and remembered we need oil to drive our cars with our minimum 25 yearly vacation days [+9] u/yyn1999: "The solution to high prices are high prices" - Kung Fu Panda 2069 [+9] u/borat_he_like_you: I just masturbated 10 minutes before my interview on Zoom. I feel ready. [+9] u/Ben_f157: You still have 5 minutes [+9] u/orsomeshitidk: Idk how anyone thought this wasn’t going be the outcome of this shit lol [+9] u/cashflow_: Me and my significant other (remy) talked about it and agreed that it would be best if I didn’t post here anymore so take care [+9] u/stupidber: Fucking joever again goddamn kangaroo market [+9] u/bearhunter429: #Futes went from DRILLING to COLLAPSING LMAO🤌 [+9] u/Bravadette: None of this would be happening if nuclear was taken seriously. [+9] u/LostandConfused2024: Damn, futures already plummeting [+9] u/WingedScapula420: Why doesn’t Jesus just walk across the Strait and unite the tribes of man? [+9] u/noahmfs: What an idiot we have as a commander in chief [+9] u/Valkorion335786: The person collapsed because he got off the teleprompter [+9] u/corndog_messiah: No tax on cringe apparently [+9] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Honestly I’d be cool if we just went down .3% every day for a decade LMAO [+9] u/SomePolack: Never get involved in a land war in Asia Wait….where’s Iran again? [+9] u/weewoowewoooo: I like how they put only 12 mines in the strait. They could only put one and nobody would want to risk getting blown the fuck up lmfaoooo [+9] u/Axonum: Red overnight so bers can be happy then V back to ATH in morning [+9] u/Isaythereisa-chance: Instead of trading, I should have moved to Antarctica to start a snow cone business like I planned. [+9] u/Mr-Bonnet: LOADED UP SOME SPY CALLS FOR TOMORROWS HUGE GAP UP [+9] u/RED-DOT-MAN: He was speaking this whole time from a teleprompter?! [+9] u/WhoLickedMyDumpling: Ofc after my puts expire worthless this dumps [+9] u/NightWalkThrowAway: What if Iran has a shit ton of calls on USO so they attack the straight so they make money? Think about it. [+9] u/GamblingMikkee: Hotline posted tomorrow [+9] u/Tasty-Coyote-9899: What you need gas for you aint got no jerbs [+9] u/diefy7321: So when do we call it the Strait of America? [+8] u/eerhmahgerd: His brain is pudding y'all. Plan accordingly [+8] u/Coogiez: Omg this is wild LMAO [+8] u/NotMe357: "BREAKING: The Department of Energy and EIA expect gasoline prices to remain high in the short term, with forecasts suggesting a decline in average prices only in late 2026 and 2027." [+8] u/2020isgreat: He is about to TACO so fast if the crowd doesn't start showing some enthusiasm [+8] u/ShopWhileHungry: My self-warming pocket pussy 9000 was on the attacked cargo ship 😞 [+8] u/NotMe357: "BREAKING: Pentagon reveals special military operation in Iran cost $11,300,000,000.00 in the first six days alone." Small number [+8] u/AgitatedJump8459: If oil breaches 90, theres no way down. Hercules told me [+8] u/Ill-Expression1737: holding spy poots but also gld calls. yes im fckn retarded [+8] u/Substantial-Tip-2871: 2 more tankers hit — Al jazeera [+8] u/Ill-Expression1737: why the fck gld tanking lol [+8] u/UsernameTaken_123: Reverse rug pull on oil [+8] u/PushAble2463: Congrats on winning the war in just 1 hour two weeks ago America! Now you just gotta actually win it in the next couple of months/years [+8] u/Worth-Athlete-9953: Futes red open green It is. [+8] u/OptionsHuduga: been losing 6 figs roughly every week for months now since October but my wife rounded up $3 for charity today at the grocery store at checkout. served her divorce papers. she crossed a line today. [+8] u/Appropriate-Run-7490: Women want walk in everything. Walk in closet, walk in pantry, walk in shower. Marry rich and walk into retirement. [+8] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Lower high …. Lower lows incoming [+8] u/callsonreddit: Market collapses when HIMS goes up [+8] u/GamblingMikkee: Every single Thursday is a huge dump [+8] u/NVDAismyg0d: Looks like calls at open as usual [+8] u/louis-debroglie: Seems pretty safe to say now that nothing the president or energy secretary can say can juice the markets anymore... they blew their loads [+8] u/puffinnbluffin: My baby mama is fucking insane [+8] u/im_burning_cookies: DJT is strong!!!! That mf can move a goalpost multiple times in a very short period! 💪 [+8] u/whitewashedsyrian: Irans got some insane fanatic fighters over there. Those mfers will blow themselves up for what they believe in. And we just murdered their pope. You think they’ll bend over and take it up the ass? Lmaooo. We’re gonna have to turn Iran into a parking lot for this to be over [+8] u/moorhound: 2024 grads that joined the Marines so they could buy a Charger with their enlistment bonus are probably some of the most cooked humans in history right now [+8] u/1337Scott: Guys serious question. If I sat in a lawnchair on the shore in the strait and used binoculars to observe a fuel tanker catching fire. If I bought calls on oil and pulled a Bobby Axelrod. Is it legal? [+8] u/PulIthEld: This is just the same shit as always. History is full of this crazy bullshit. Did you know one time France gave their entire military over to a 17 year old girl because she said she had visions and it actually worked? Then they just sold her out to the English who burned her alive? This wasn't even that long ago. [+8] u/Mindless_Map2883: BREAKING: ~5 container ships have come under fire by Iranian drone boats that are stored in underground bunkers… Russia and China are supplying them with intel and satellite imagery, and Chinese oil tankers are still passing through the straight….. This could be it, time for a desert storm coalition ground invasion, scorched earth [+8] u/Sick0h: Boats with wheels, stop getting distracted [+8] u/hermeskino715: What a shitastic day [+8] u/Leather_Mention5916: Biden flying b2 bombers to annihilate my portfolio LMAO [+8] u/Flat-Focus7966: Selling calls is a sure shot way for me to make the stock fly So you counter it by buying calls... [+8] u/Level_Counter3062: If one thing is certain this war is going to drag on a very long time, and a quick resolution being priced in is just delaying the inevitable [+8] u/pootenanner: Oil straight up. Yikes [+8] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: wait so the Straight of Alex Hormozi is still closed? [+8] u/stupidber: Thanks to u/Rare-ish_Birb for being the only one to wish me good luck on my surgery today. Thanks babe. ❤️ [+8] u/CardiologistEqual336: it will take years to recover from 🥭’s mess [+8] u/sl3azebag: who is gonna stop me from ending it if I get liquidated? Literally nobody bro. [+8] u/abroadbroadband: Here's the truth: If everyone wasn't so horny and perverted we wouldn't be in this mess Any mess We would be in zero messes And that's a fact [+8] u/pmotiveforce: Spy 580. Bull, angrily, face red and sweaty: th th thank God. Buying opportunity! I wanted this. [+8] u/sanmar2225: #like those three advil you popped weren’t advil, the HIMS boner is coming like it or not [+8] u/cashflow_: I spent 7 million on lobster. That’s why me and remy so fat [+8] u/Same-Brilliant2014: If we could just hurry up, dump to 645 so I can buy leap calls and then just chill rest of year that would be great. [+8] u/get_da_maney: Open at 660 tmrw lmao [+8] u/Legitimate-Ant6838: Do we crash tomorrow [+8] u/NeedleworkerOne8258: I WONDER HOW IS BORRON TRUMMMP DOING WITH HIS PORTFOLIO 🧐 [+8] u/UsernameTaken_123: Now we just need houthies to mine the Suez canal and we're golden [+8] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Straight up, if you look at the yearly charts, we are fucked. [+8] u/alfred250: The guys renovating my office were all talking about shorting private credit today saying “its like the big short, the banks are hiding the credit ratings”.🤦🏼‍♂️🤦🏼‍♂️ This is going to shred a lot of people on a bounce [+8] u/Swiftnice: OPEC could end this war so fast if they are secretly decided to cut production way more than they need to and blame it on the war. Oil would go to 200 and 🥭would be forced to end it. [+8] u/GuyFaulks77: Futures are barely down 1%. Sunday night we were down over 2% and finished the day up 1%. Tomorrow we hit $680+ [+8] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Yea my NBIS puts are cooked that stock is a resilient bastard [+8] u/Tacosdonahue: the first 2 rows weigh 10,000 lbs [+8] u/YNeverWAlone: Into schools for some reason [+8] u/ring_of_slattern: Ayatollah tweets video of Iran bombing fentanyl tankers in the strait of Hormuz! [+8] u/ThermalChaser: None of these guys went to med school let's be honest [+8] u/SchwiftySchwifferson: Whatever 🥭 is going to say, it’s not going to be good for markets if he waited this long [+8] u/JohanLiebert92: Leon Kennedy would win this war, solo. Nothing stops him. [+8] u/nyse25: they're deploying cashflow and his ugly ass dog in Iran [+8] u/Brilliant_Object_847: Puts on checks and balances [+8] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: Mango might as well grow the mustache out at this point [+8] u/Odd-Block-2998: What is worse than a war? A war + a trade war [+8] u/I_Own_A_Fedora_AMA: My moves tomorrow depend on how SPY opens. Green, I buy more SPY puts. Red, I hold my SPY puts. Simple as. [+8] u/NotMe357: "BREAKING: TACO says he will tap into the U.S. Strategic Petroleum Reserve "a little bit."" [+8] u/spyputs1: You take risks when your directly in the line of fire 💨 [+8] u/TimujinTheTrader: I thought the war ended three days ago... [+8] u/newtoeso: Was so close to selling my oil position before close but didn’t. Seems like a good call [+8] u/It-hurts-whenIP: Market down -0.5% in after hours and only 3% off all time highs WSB: THE MARKET CRASH OF 2026 IS HERE [+8] u/PinealTone: I hope you guys didint threw away the Dow is at $40k cap.. chances are you can wear it again this year. [+8] u/ZealousidealSector19: Hmm I messed up again [+8] u/Educational-Fan6035: It is not good to kill 175 kids for no reason. Right ?? 🙃🙃 [+8] u/TickTockTaudit: Money for nothing. By Dire Straits. [+8] u/AggieDem: **BREAKING** NVDA announces partnership with Vault-Tec. [+8] u/borat_he_like_you: If you have to serve in the War in Iran, just acknowledge there's a much higher chance of your significant other cheating on you when he/she is still in the States. The person who you're partner is cheating with is called a Jody. [+8] u/modder9: I make bigger historic releases after a big dinner. [+8] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Hot take: getting hit in the balls is 100% more painful than childbirth I don’t give a fuck what you say. Scientific evidence to follow. I(and a friends mom) have both had pancreatitis. She said it was a worse pain than childbirth. I on the other hand, would say getting your nuts slapped was a worse feeling than pancreatitis. Therefore nut taps are worse than childbirth. No man has ever……(excluding r34/kinky fucks) gotten slapped in the nuts and said “great let’s do it again” Also pee is stored in the balls. [+8] u/pootenanner: Market moon tomorrow confirmed because I dabbled in 1dte puts at close. [+8] u/LarsTarkas: Sold all my shares the other day and full ported Nintendo stock. Absolutely flying right now [+8] u/AlmightyCheesusCrust: Using Jake and his platform to get young voters to vote for him [+8] u/guy_cloutier: SPY 660 and bounce back up on bullshit tweet [+8] u/Fhyzikz: So realistically what happens if oil prices go too high? Some version of a TACO or... something else? [+8] u/Nateleb1234: Why can't ships just go around the strait? If I'm driving somewhere and a road is blocked or closed I find another way. Wtf. Just go around. [+8] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: 😴 how I’m gonna be sleeping tonight knowing I’m cash gang [+7] u/jonneh: Looks like this is having the opposite effect, which is inevitable when you keep bullshitting the market. # - CL still up +5% - USO up +4.5% # > 🥭 authorized Department of Energy to release 172 million barrels from strategic petroleum reserve, beginning next week, DOE says. # > Will take approx 120 days to deliver 💀 [+7] u/Certifieddddd: Taco shouldn’t have attacked Iran during Ramadan. Now those people are hungry and angry or hangry 🤣🤣 [+7] u/Gom_KBull: # Recent updates (past hour) * Extremely heavy airstrikes across Beirut southern suburbs * Iran-linked hackers hit medical giant Stryker in retaliatory cyberattack * Four killed as Israeli attacks continue in southern Lebanon * Israeli attack kills six on Beirut’s waterfront * Bahrain says Iran attacked fuel tanks in Muharraq * Saudi Arabia intercepts 18 drones [+7] u/D1finalboss: Somebody is spending a fortune to keep this market from going dizdown [+7] u/cyril1991: Leave some pussy for the rest of us bruh [+7] u/McKoijion: Would you rather they bomb elementary schools like the US and Israel? [+7] u/modder9: Bro is describing trains [+7] u/modder9: He’s been outed many times. Lady G [+7] u/im_burning_cookies: Man let’s bring back George bush. He’s not in the Epstein files and there’s no way he could be fooled 5 times right??! [+7] u/louis-debroglie: More private credit implosion with Morgan Stanley now capping withdrawals [+7] u/GoogleKushforLunch: As soon as I hold my calls overnight spy wanna drop it like it’s hot [+7] u/Hwangoutpltr: Some of you people have huge Amazon nuts and it shows [+7] u/avdvetf: america is fucked, Iran has nothin to lose [+7] u/avdvetf: iran can just market manipulate all day long and finance itself iran literally has nothing to lose, this will go on years without a proper ground invasion [+7] u/Salty-Bid1597: Some of them obviously do [+7] u/borat_he_like_you: Senator Lindsay Graham said he'll be going back to his state of South Carolina to ask them to send their sons & daughters over to the Middle East to fight against Iran🤣🤣🤣🤣 [+7] u/hermeskino715: Asia? May I ask to take it easy on the selling? If you want to sell/crash something then do TSLA. Shit is still green for some reason [+7] u/portfoliorating: # BROS, WHAT WOULD THE DOW BE AT IF WE DIDN'T BOMB IRAN AND ALL THESE 💩? [+7] u/DelaCruza: Really should've got a full tank of gas couple weeks ago [+7] u/2020isgreat: At what SPX does Bessent get on a tanker himself and sail across the strait as a show of confidence [+7] u/Worth-Athlete-9953: Fuck yeah dump my full port!! [+7] u/ThermalChaser: We have to assume we have incompetent presidents. Yup. [+7] u/TapIllustrious2366: With a combined iq of 75 [+7] u/Effective_Dog3089: My friend told me I’m so gooned out he can’t see light in my eyes anymore [+7] u/TransformersScorge: 660s tomorrow. Cash gang are u ready? [+7] u/GibonFrog: Ships are literally on fire in the Strait, nobody's paying attention, oil can't get through, and $USO is gonna spike bigly. [+7] u/mayorolivia: Time to be a panican [+7] u/ComfortableWolf779: Spy will drop below 600 this year [+7] u/zendayastoothbrush: Google will rule the world [+7] u/ismebbb: Bulls moving back in with their parents after tomorrow [+7] u/NeverDeltaNeutral: The children yearn for the mines. Lets have have em start captaining ships through the strait of Hormuz [+7] u/randomquartile1: Get ready for circuit breaker today! [+7] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Considering the state of his hair, not sure this is clinically possible [+7] u/jazzgrackle: It’s kinda cool how the market knows what contracts I have and keeps the prices just below or above my strike price, that way it can tease me before it fucks me. [+7] u/GreenGameboyColor: I may be broke, but at least I'm handsome [+7] u/Garbage-Disposal-938: LOL Nick Sandman. "I said that guy is getting scammed. You know what, he scammed them." First rule of public speaking: Always call your guest a scammer. [+7] u/McClintockC: Y'all are invited to my regime reveal party 🥳💗💙🇮🇷 [+7] u/beerstearns: I checked my local grocery store and olive oil and some other oils havent got any more expensive so don’t believe the media lies [+7] u/Worth-Athlete-9953: Imagining we flat until 2027? [+7] u/Fineous40: Flat is an optimistic term [+7] u/ajibtunes: Oil prices surged once again past $100 per barrel overnight, despite the historic release of reserves as Middle East conflict escalates. [+7] u/McKoijion: Israel bombing oil fields is particularly insane. All of the carbon emissions of burning fossil fuels and none of the benefits. [+7] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Dino juice fading, spy doing the V thing … bers thought. It’s me. I’m gay ber. [+7] u/WallofNarwhal: Is there a version of this thread/sub for girls only? [+7] u/Bobbbyyy808: Lmao why is jake there [+7] u/Beneficial-Diamond10: NIKKEI is Drilling 🇯🇵 [+7] u/Basis_404_: SPY is showing a legit rounded top pattern on the 1 year chart and bulls still think a rip is around the corner [+7] u/CumomEileen: Does anyone know Barron’s polymarket handle fr, I just want to mirror his trades to make up the losses his dad caused my account, it’s only fair [+7] u/Independent-Tree-985: My new strategy is to use this old magic 8 ball I found [+7] u/surmoiFire: $4.8 gas at the pump, man I am cutting back my OF subscriptions to pay gas 😆 [+7] u/sailorsmile: That kid needed better aim [+7] u/OrdinaryMix4013: 🌮: If you bitch about gas prices, ride a fuckin bike [+7] u/cannythecat: Miss, you better start believing in lost decades [+7] u/DefiantDelta: corn got so boring no one even cares anymore. oh, it’s 67k? cool. now it’s 70k? wow. now it’s back to 67k? fascinating. [+7] u/ChickenYip: imagine holding calls rn when u can be holding puts [+7] u/DH64: SPY crossing the 200 ema lmao [+7] u/DonDiabloTheGreat: Sleepy Joe could probably steer a tanker through the Strait or Hormuz all by himself [+7] u/user365735: Trump says no mines and ships should start crossing. Show us the way with 2 navy ships crossing the strait side by side🐡 [+7] u/Solid-Season9984: #ARE YOU OR HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ASSOCIATED WITH THE BERRORIST PARTY!?!? [+6] u/2020isgreat: Surely the treasury won't supress oil prices if shortages appear [+6] u/FinishWarm1746: SPY fucking plummeting after hours [+6] u/cashflow_: Im gonna move to Barranquilla Colombia which is where shakira and sofia vergara are both from. Spicy [+6] u/Neel_Crashkari: You're witnessing global financial collapse in real-time [+6] u/TomorrowSavings7579: #I LOVE WHEN I'M GREEN AND THE MARKET IS RED. I LOVE BEATING THE S&P 500!! [+6] u/Aggravating_Sir_4709: AI IS GAY. IT DOESN'T STOP BOMBS [+6] u/StopLossOptional: It guides them actually [+6] u/orsomeshitidk: The 52 week low still in the sub $500s and people can’t fathom is going below 665 lmao [+6] u/Inner-Cobbler-2432: I bet on gold miners while sea mines was the play... [+6] u/Hellmale: He has no choice. Before mid term elections he doesn’t want oil prices going up 😂 [+6] u/J_da_CPA: California gets attacked first. Its why the billionaires are leaving for their bunkers in Florida [+6] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: It's all computer (we killed like 200 children) [+6] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: BREAKING: Trump reportedly preparing to invoke Cold-War era powers in order to revive oil production off California coast. [+6] u/zeren1ty: There should be direct market ramifications for the war not ending “soon” like mango claimed Simply unacceptable for oil to crab at 88 when it was at 100 before he made his bs claim [+6] u/I_am_Nerman: Multiple large fires are continuing to spread throughout Oman’s MINA Petroleum Facility at the Port of Salalah Black smoke can be seen rising as a fire burns near Bahrain International Airport, following reports of an Iranian drone attack earlier against fuel tanks at a facility on Muharraq Island. [+6] u/Big-News-2704: At this point if 🥭 told me I had a dick I'd go get a tampon subscription. This m'fker lie about everything [+6] u/Groundbreaking_Big17: why can't Lizzo just make the sacrifice for the world and sit in between Iran and Israel? [+6] u/astromouse2024: Nvda puts ✅ Ass blasted ✅ [+6] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: I hope im so fuk rich tomorrow [+5] u/sleepygarner: I wouldn't rule out Epstein dropping a nuke