What Are Your Moves Tomorrow, March 10, 2026

[+226] u/urahozer: One of the most retarded days I've seen in a while. Secretary of War not even 24hrs said, "this is only the beginning" and here we are green lol [+191] u/trainwreck001: LET ME CHECK.... YUP...THE STRAIT OF HORMUZ IS CLOSED AF. LOL [+172] u/The_BakedCrusader: Classic 🥭. Do something retarded, shake up the world, make it worse, then abruptly declare victory and claim that you're the reason for the recovery [+161] u/GoZukkYourself: Bers blew a 28-3 lead 🤣 [+135] u/AppleJuiceTwo: People are dumber than I thought if they actually believe trump. theres no way the war is almost over [+135] u/sillyhands1: Be honest regards, how many of you fomo’d into oil and lost it all 🤡 [+121] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Pat yourselves in the back, bulls. We survived yet another day in this insanely regarded market. P.s fuck bers [+89] u/Nervous-Basis-1707: Tomorrow we pump but this war ending news is fake. No way Iran accepts peace after they attacked their oil refineries. [+81] u/bearhunter429: #Last night futures were down -2.5% yet we closed up almost 1% LMAO🤌 [+79] u/sonspurs: This has to be the most fucked up market in human history [+78] u/Voltthrower69: declare war on Iran -bomb a bunch of kids -kill the supreme leader -get supreme leader’s son put in charge -globally raise oil prices -nothing has changed except a bunch of dead kids -declare victory [+71] u/Evander85: So you can just say you won a war these days [+70] u/zeren1ty: “The market is closed now, Mr President” “Excellent work today, tell them they can let oil run now until 4am tomorrow” [+61] u/pooterssssssssss: That was one of THE most iconic trading days ever. Just madness. A day like today is WHY we play this freaking game. [+61] u/lovingduckbutter: So I should buy calls and puts each day and just exit when each is up? [+60] u/pineapplekiwipen: "Pretend that the war is over and the rest will fall into place" \- Sun Tzu, *The Art of War* [+59] u/papichuloya: So he just need to say, “yup we won , its over” the market just goes up? Just like that? No facts or anything needed? [+57] u/ThermalChaser: Been fighting with the wife but I declared the argument complete so it's all good. [+54] u/mtnrnnr802: This is the healthiest market I’ve ever seen bro [+53] u/eyerollingsex: **SPY 677 last Thursday:** Jesus Christ we’re so fucking cooked **SPY 677 today:** Holy fuck, we’re so back [+52] u/PositiveToe2761: Incoming press conference “ the war is basically over we just need to put a few boots on the ground to secure the strait of hormuz” [+51] u/SergeantThreat: If anyone ever hacked 🥭’s truth social, they could make the algorithm bots move absolutely insane amounts of money with a couple posts [+50] u/2020isgreat: it almost sounds like it isn't over [+47] u/GeneralRaspberry8102: Bears actually upset the global economy didn’t collapse. [+47] u/wrongrobertpatrick: Exit liquidity achieved— I don’t trust this market [+46] u/rixxxand: We had to fight this war. Iran has a deadly stockpile of enriched uranium and alive school children that we needed to eliminate [+46] u/pleasestoptalkin: “We lost a lot of good men out there” You served in Iran, grandpa? “No, but I tried to trade options during it” [+45] u/TheLelouchLamperouge: Don’t you guys get it? Iran will just forget we blew up their ayatollah and go back to not making nuclear bombs underground [+44] u/NewDawn101: Q: You've said the war is 'very complete,' but Hegseth says this is just the beginning. Which is it? Trump: Well, I think you could say both Yes this real. [+44] u/mods_ban_me: “War is very complete” “We need to control the Strait of Hormuz” Lmao [+42] u/rixxxand: We'll spend all of tonight shittalking bears before ending tomorrow 4% down. Inverse wsb everytime. [+40] u/LargeScar819: Bought puts at 10am and that probably ended the War. You're welcome [+40] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: “The supreme art of war is accomplishing none of your stated objectives and then simply declaring victory” ~Heg Su (Ancient Chinese Secretary of Warfense) [+36] u/NoBuyers: The war is won, and next week it will be won even more. [+36] u/SHUT_DOWN_EVERYTHING: > The war is over, but also just beginning. [+35] u/xavras_wyzryn: Worst Black Monday ever. [+35] u/wildcat1055: "We have won the war. But it's not a war. They named the new leader the son of the old leader. But they have surrendered. No, we don't have any specific demands, just say we won." [+34] u/L3GASEE: Is it not obvious that he is trying to steal the next election or am I the delusional one? [+34] u/Haikoe: I wouldn’t touch this market with my dog’s dick [+34] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Hot take: 🥭 eod pump was just to create exit liquidity [+34] u/pmotiveforce: Other than the Iran war, things look great. Massive job losses, private credit bubble, and AI costing way more than it generates. We are so set when 🥭 lies and says war is done. [+34] u/Oglifter8336: Damn. Poor fuckers that died over this bullshit “war”. Rot in hell old man. [+33] u/Ahthongkorkor: *TRUMP ON IRAN: WILL NOT RELENT UNTIL ENEMY IS DEFEATED -Walter Bloomberg so is it over or not wtf? cant make up his mind [+33] u/jiggolo420: I almost typed "mango livestream" into google just now. The fuck has this sub done to me? 🙄 [+33] u/TyroneSwoopes: If Netanyahu isn’t saying the war is over then that shit ain’t over lmao. Taco can’t taco this time cause he is not calling the shots [+33] u/2020isgreat: \*IRAN PLANS TO IMPOSE DUTIES ON TANKERS IN PERSIAN GULF: CNN they're using his own spells against him[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2031157694753644756) [+32] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Where's the guy that turned $1,000 into $1 million? I know he's here [+31] u/Voltthrower69: He’s going to do this like 4 more times teasing it being over then it continuing [+31] u/sleepygarner: Can't do it. Losing the few braincells I have left listening to this retard. [+31] u/CasherburyTales: Teleprompter guy: “Why do I bother setting this stupid thing up.” [+31] u/Adventurous_Tea_2198: Iran would never have the balls to target Intel’s most advanced manufacturing faciity at Intel Israel’s Kiryat Gat Campus located at Sderot Avats 2 Kiryat Gat Israel 31.59473, 34.78801 [+30] u/OrangMiskin: The war isn’t over LMAO no fucking way retards [+30] u/Retaining-Wall: A 90% decline in..... Various things. Nice analysis fuckwit. [+29] u/TheBlueBlaze: 🥭 said Iran's nuclear program was set back by "decades" **eight months ago**, and he's back to saying they were weeks away from a warhead. How the fuck can anything he says be taken at face value? [+29] u/AvocadoPurees: Can't get my mind off the thought of how psychotic it is. The audacity to burn someone's family to ashes and turn around and just walk away and declare victory. Turn off the politics. Just examine the absurdity of that event [+29] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: We genuinely live in a Simpsons episode where the events of the day have no long-lasting effect on the timeline as a whole . The market is flat oil is barely up over the last two weeks and the Ayatollah has the last name Khamenei. You couldn’t write it better if you tried [+29] u/Noddite: Trump - I'm going to pick their leader in Iran Israel - we will assassinate the next leader in Iran Iran - we picked an even more radical leader who hates all of you with a burning passion as bright as 10 nuclear bombs Trump - war is over, carry on. [+29] u/thewaterb0yyyy: This sub is way more fun when there’s volatility [+28] u/orsomeshitidk: Yall retarded thinking a tweet ends a war lmao [+28] u/Mean_Bumblebee1945: This absolutely doesnt sound like a peacedeal is ready [+28] u/bearhunter429: #Last night when oil futures were up 25%, many gas stations already adjusted their prices up 25%. In the morning oil crashed and many of them are taking their sweet time adjusting it back down. LMAO🤌 [+27] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: “We’re starting this war to destroy Iran’s nuclear capabilities and overthrow their regime” “Did you get their uranium?” “No” “Did you overthrow their regime?” “No” “Are they no longer able to attack us and our allies?” “No” “So we’re still at war?” “No the war is over, we accomplished all of our objectives ahead of schedule” [+27] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Today might be the single most retarded day in the market I’ve seen in my entire life and my ass was trading when people were talking about “getting eyeballs” in 2000 [+27] u/tesseramous: Today's update on the war: "no men in women's sports" [+27] u/SoloOutdoor: Hard taco = mango backs out of something Soft taco = mango lies about something [+27] u/IGotSkills: Every damn time wsb freaks out about a crash, buy calls [+27] u/binga001: I want to crack a joke on 🥭 but nah this isn't funny..thise kids would have been alive.. 200 kids' lives all gone for what? [+27] u/louis-debroglie: So we're still at war and the strait is still closed... what exactly has changed? [+27] u/mangofruitdude: Whoever said ships are moving through the strait of hormuz again is lying. Facetimining with my cousin who is stuck on a tanker rn lol. They have no information on when they can leave edit: Holy fuck are there many tankers. It looks insane [+26] u/JakeSal10: This mf is talking straight bullshit [+26] u/sitkaocean4444: Mango lying about shit is whatever, but the stock market reacting to his lies after like a fucking decade of this is regarded af. How do any of these cretins on Wall Street have an ounce of self respect anymore? Like just once can mango say some shit and then the market goes nah, and then drills 2%. I’m not even a bear I just want a bit of normalcy back [+26] u/deertracker2022: Anyone else get basically all their news from this sub? Like, why read anything else, it's fucking nihilist's delight on here. The best. [+26] u/Voltthrower69: Congrats trump you killed a bunch of kids that didn’t need to die. Fuck you. [+26] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: 1. Replace Khamenei with Khamenei 2. Waste years worth of interceptors in a week 3. Sacrifice 7 service members 4. Declare victory while your enemy is still firing missiles at you 5. ??? 6. Profit [+26] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Ahead of schedule isn’t over https://preview.redd.it/qtyzhgb1f3og1.jpeg?width=1102&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a54da1d91d8f0d8226c4cb209910a22e2ebe77c [+25] u/Ok-Analysis4121: This war isn't over. Not even close. 🥭 just did a desperation pump [+25] u/xlmtothemoon: "guys walking around with no legs and no arms" LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL [+25] u/vermilli21: Why am I still getting Iran updates about bombing if “we won” already [+25] u/orsomeshitidk: This admin thinks only of the current market. A 0dte presidency. You can’t go flexing like this all across the globe and there not be long term fallout. [+25] u/Bizonistic: "If Iran does anything that stops the flow of Oil within the Strait of Hormuz, they will be hit by the United States of America TWENTY TIMES HARDER than they have been hit thus far. " WHY NOT TWO TRILLION TIMES HARDER??? [+24] u/kalakesri: how do you lose a PR war against Iran of all places lmao [+24] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Sooo is there a point to this speech? If this was about an Iran announcement he would've done it already. This is fluff to try and keep the market up [+24] u/OrangMiskin: Green now means red later [+24] u/ArcDogRob: CEO of Saudi Aramco Oil: “Catastrophic consequences for oil never been seen before” Mango: “Relax, guy” WSB: “pamp it” [+23] u/cityexile: Freaks out about oil and markets. Says, we have won, but not yet, will be over very soon, but maybe will take a while longer. Markets reassured… [+23] u/dingusmingus2222: MOTHER FUCKER YOU ARE IN CHARGE AND OWN ALL BRANCHES OF THE GOVERNMENT. Your saying we have the most corrupt elections is very telling... [+23] u/Minute-Leg7346: To think Americans seen four years of this and decided more please lmfao regarded nation [+23] u/topcheddarsauce: This idiot wears his own hat and a blue suit to a funeral he caused and just decides the war is over. It’s insane nobody near him calls him a retard. [+23] u/Vikingnorris: I’m genuinely getting pissed off how difficult is for the average person to get by living paycheck to paycheck and these mfers in Washington only caring that they are living comfortably, democrats and republicans both suck [+23] u/UnivalveX: - dump -1% on war fears - pump +2% on the president downplaying the war art of the steal [+23] u/Sick0h: 🥭: war is over IDF: missiles currently headed our way [+23] u/Arnab_Goswami_RTV: Fuck my fucking ber life [+23] u/DefiantDelta: he basically did his own MISSION ACCOMPLISHED banner and many permabull genuinely believe him. incredible [+23] u/ahopye: This is the funniest market I've seen. It rewards smooth brained derangement. Do illogical, unhinged shit and you could walk away with generational wealth here. Yeah you'll probably end up broke, but you'll probably end up broke doing logical shit anyway. I'm not going to the roulette table and putting chips down on most of the numbers to grind out a couple of dollars. Hell. I'm not even putting it all on black or red. I'm putting it all on one or two numbers. My great grandkids will be driving lambos or working in the poorhouse [+23] u/McKoijion: Iran is launching missiles at Israel right now. [+23] u/daisymoth9: someone tell the gas stations that the war is over [+23] u/This_Possible_3942: Has the strait of America opened up yet? [+23] u/Greedy_Pin_9187: Hostile Orange Retardation Maritime Unrest Zone [+23] u/InsaneBallsack: All we’ve accomplished is making the ayatollahs son the new ayatollah lol [+22] u/louis-debroglie: One thing the press conference made clear: this failure will be treated like all other failures of the administration. Create an alternate reality for the true believers to take comfort in, give them a way to believe that we're "winning". Fairly obvious this was intended for a domestic audience. The state of the war has not materially changed since yesterday. [+22] u/Disc0Disc0Disc0: Ain't no fucking way this war is over. We got Epstein files to hide and Midterms to cancel. [+22] u/seancron: How do you americans listen to this shit and think "fuck ya this gets my vote" [+22] u/SoloOutdoor: As much as I enjoy this im not sure im ok with my wealth riding on unhinged hersay headlines. Today showed it in full force. [+22] u/ercanbas: I have a feeling that Iran is going to bomb Israel during his press conference. [+22] u/mangofruitdude: Im actually losing braincells listening to this retard and im not even a native english speaker. How are you americans bear this shit lmao [+22] u/31andnotdone: imagine thinking this is close to being over. [+22] u/Overall-Fold-9720: So let me get this straight Iran surrendered to its neighbors. They have no navy, no airforce, no telecommunications We won the war *BUT* It won't be over until they unconditionally surrender So ... maybe we didn't win yet ? [+22] u/Country_Gravy420: Fuck he is tough to listen to. It's just full retard. You can't ever go full retard [+22] u/pineapplekiwipen: we're actually seeing the advent of a new political system where instead of voting you can sell SPY to disagree with current government actions [+22] u/looool_k_libtard: Oil going to $350 after I drink all the water in the strait of Hormuz [+22] u/nyse25: After this whole COVID thing blows over I'm going to get a gf and start going to the gym [+22] u/ConsiderationKey1658: #8======== D bull #8=== D bear #8=D bearhunter429 #LMAO🤌🏻 [+22] u/spurious_elephant: Sort by: retarded (default) [+22] u/Who_is_Your_Zaddy: Bers in absolute shambles [+22] u/bigmeatbag: "No other president is gonna fuck kids like me!" -Donnie [+22] u/vanceraa: Iran opening and tariffing the strait is fucking hilarious [+22] u/Retaining-Wall: Market: Panik. Oh thank fuck 🥭 is talking. Kalm. He has a strat— wait a second, this guy's a fucking retard! Resume panik. [+21] u/leshermes: he thinks he can turn war off, just like his tariff bullshit 😂🤡 [+21] u/Specialist_Fig9458: “Very complete, pretty much” is up there with “I have a friend, very rich, very overweight” and “what if a bomb landed on your head right now?” As dumbest things I’ve heard in the past year [+21] u/Ahthongkorkor: 🥭 actively mocking Iran now, what's the end game here? "The world respects us right now more than ever before" the world thinks you're regarded [+21] u/zestykite: im $200 away from margin call on oil futures. poor decisions were made today. [+21] u/Brief_Introduction78: "I don't wanna brag" must be the funniest thing I've heard from this man [+21] u/DamnTheDan: 100% puts tomorrow. You know the drill [+21] u/Val44x: He literally just said war is complete an hour ago and the market injected billions [+21] u/platinumarks: WTF, this guy is literally insane. He gets asked whether the new Supreme Leader has a target on his back, and his response is that he doesn't want to say, but someone tried to assassinate him before so...what? [+21] u/Such_Coin: Just to clarify in case you missed it: the war will be over soon, but the military operation will continue for some time. [+21] u/PompeiiSketches: This market is completely senile. Are we really going to open red and then recover again? Like all of last week? [+21] u/CalRippedken: Bers shouldn't be allowed to look at futures since they don't want there to be one [+21] u/sha1dy: # THE STRAIT IS OPEN. FUCK YOUR PUTS. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER. [+21] u/GuyFaulks77: It’s going to take me a long time to care about futures after that stunt today [+21] u/ercanbas: Crazy how Iran had only one tomahawk missile and they used it on a school. [+21] u/_pout_: It's bullish in here. -4% day incoming. [+21] u/IllBuyYourCar: Was down 2% an hour ago. Closed +1% I AM NOT A PANICAN [+21] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Finally got approved for disability. All I had to do was show I bought puts everyday for a year. The doctors notes said “clearly suffers from extreme mental defects” [+21] u/platinumarks: LOL, that reporter has massive balls to tell 🥭 to his face that Iran doesn't have Tomahawk missiles like he claimed [+21] u/Les7X: Mango has made the market a literal casino. It's just gambling, zero sense involved. Moving trillions with a tweet based on absolutely nothing [+20] u/brannock_: > * TRUMP: OPERATION EPSTEIN FURY WILL CONTINUE [+20] u/HaveTwoBananas: You'd have to be a retard to believe anything this guy says [+20] u/NotMe357: "Israeli official responds to TACO’s claim war is ‘complete,’ says operations against Iran are ‘far from over,’ could continue for weeks" [+20] u/penelope5674: This market is a joke. Oil went from 120 to 85 in a day. Gold crashed 10% in a week. I’m sitting here holding index funds like a cuck and still losing money [+20] u/softboiledjadepotato: "People who died, and are walking around with no legs and no arms"... How did that not elicit a follow up question? [+20] u/TakeThatBro: Gen Z can now afford a home in Tehran [+20] u/Sea_Trip_8941: This is the biggest clown market I’ve ever seen. [+20] u/BugStock: For those unaware, Ships are passing through the strait with their AIS turned off; this is why they all look clumped together on marine traffic at both sides. Its a common practice in contested areas and frequent piracy areas. - I may be regarded but I work onboard ships so this is kinda my shi [+20] u/IceyFoxes: why are we so bullish now im scared [+20] u/cashflow_: WE ARE IN AN R SHAPED ECONOMY. THE R STANDS FOR REGARDED [+20] u/Clear_Anything1232: Oil slowly creeping up as the realization of empty promises sets in [+20] u/Potential_Version_34: I cheated on my wife the other day and she found out about it We’re fighting a lot recently But I think I’ll just state that the fighting will be over soon, that should work right? [+19] u/Loan-Pickle: 🥭 is saying the war is almost over. Then today he also posted on Truth Social that the defense companies agreed to ramp up manufacturing. I am thinking this is not almost over. [+19] u/JakeSal10: This sounds like a continuing war speech lol [+19] u/Salty-Bid1597: Gulf states now have a lot of damaged oil infrastructure, not a lot of ammo and some really angry religious nutters just across the sea while Donny sails his boats home to safety. [+19] u/Eddyrancid: "She has to be of age, you know above 6 years old" - The Islands slipping out a bit Donnie [+19] u/BarbellPadawan: It’s kind of funny how the market actually believes him. [+19] u/EvolvingDior: Tankers are not moving through the strait not because Iran closed it, but because they are afraid to be caught in the crossfire. US warships escorting tankers through the strait actually increases the risk to those tankers as the warships are valid military targets. [+19] u/DisgrunltedDan: Mango just posted 🚨  If Iran does anything that stops the flow of Oil within the Strait of Hormuz, they will be hit by the United States of America TWENTY TIMES HARDER than they have been hit thus far. Additionally, we will take out easily destroyable targets that will make it virtually impossible for Iran to ever be built back, as a Nation, again — Death, Fire, and Fury will reign upon them - But I hope, and pray, that it does not happen! This is a gift from the United States of America to China, and all of those Nations that heavily use the Hormuz Strait. Hopefully, it is a gesture that will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP 37 ReTruths 110 Likes 3/9/26, 8:30 PM [+19] u/Usedillusion7: Imagine being the gullible idiot that believes 🥭 talking about the tomahawk missile earlier. [+19] u/OkResponsibility2470: Iran do nt wanna negotiate so 🥭 just made a peace deal with himself 🤣 [+19] u/Ghost1914: So those 7 soldiers literally died for nothing [+19] u/42thefloor2011: War is not over. Back to 650 [+19] u/Overall-Fold-9720: 🥭 : "Iran surrendered, we are winning, Iran has no communication, no marine, no aviation, the war is basically over" "What about Hormuz" 🥭: 😠 [+19] u/McKoijion: > IRAN SAYS HORMUZ OPEN TO STATES THAT EXPEL US, ISRAELI ENVOYS Iran is going to keep attacking Israel. They're forcing the gulf states to pick sides. https://www.dropsitenews.com/p/iran-us-israel-war-persian-gulf-strikes-trump-mojtaba-khamenei-pezeshkian [+19] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: Considering the new supreme leaders entire family was just executed, not sure this will go as Orange Man planned. Not only did his father die, but his son and wife were also killed in the blast last week. [+19] u/SubduedWeed: See y'all tomorrow for the devastating market crash predicted by bears everyday in the pre-market into green again tomorrow. [+19] u/Haboubiii: How is 🥭 allowed to say made up lies and the market goes bananza. "Yeah the war is over" Mf says who, guy is living in constant delusion [+19] u/pmotiveforce: 🥭 is right you know. Could have been anybody's Tomahawks. I have like 4 of them (all accounted for, so wasn't me). The average Iranian has like 3. No way to know whose Tomahawk that was. [+19] u/Voltthrower69: We’re now in a period of empire decline where the president manipulates markets through starting global conflict and generating confusion around its resolution while insider trading on the announcements. We’re cooked. [+18] u/ComprehensiveKiwi489: Crude oil went nearly -40% from their +30% peak yesterday. I'm pretty sure we've never seen something like this before. [+18] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: So we sank an unarmed ship when we could’ve captured it because sinking it would be “more fun”? That’s… a war crime [+18] u/zestykite: kinda hard to believe another "we are winning so much" statement moves the markets this much. [+18] u/Ahthongkorkor: 🥭 timed the statement during market hours to pump, then u-turns the moment futures close ceasefire? Escalation? deescalation? nukes? who knows anymore [+18] u/Overall-Fold-9720: LMAO, last week he said Iran surrendered (they didn't), the market pumped This week he says the war is won, the market pump He just has to come with increasingly unhinged lies, and we'll be fine Propaganda like we didn't see in 70 years [+18] u/boris1869: He and his administration are straight up talking in circles, lying shamelessly, and trying to gaslight the media and public. Surprisingly with a lot of success [+18] u/theummeower: 🥭: “The war will be over soon” Reporter: “when is soon? This week or…?” 🥭: “🎶No. Maybe. I don’t know. Can you repeat the question? You’re not the boss of me now! 🎶” [+18] u/mods_ban_me: Mango incriminating himself on the tomahawk question lmaooooo [+18] u/portfoliorating: # SO THEY TRAPPED ENOUGH BOLS (MYSELF INCLUDED) 😭😭😭😭😭😭 [+18] u/Urzuck: So we basically rallied on nothing lmao [+18] u/Garbage-Disposal-938: President Trump has threatened to strike Iran “twenty times harder" calls on HIMS [+18] u/AnotherDegenerateFK: I spent 50% of my money on alcohol, women, & gambling. The other half, I wasted. [+18] u/Reply_Stunning: wait, but ze american leader said the war is ending, they won ? why is he obsessive compulsively lying every monday morning like a street whore ? [+18] u/FullCopy: So, the market was crashing due to the war. Then 🥭 sad it was OK. And everybody believed him. [+18] u/Same-Brilliant2014: Masterful work by Putin to get orange to drop sanctions. Crazy to have such a good lapdog [+18] u/DefiantDelta: him “signaling the war could end soon” carries about as much weight as me signaling the bubble guts could end soon before I even drink my venti latte with whole milk [+18] u/neutralpoliticsbot: I never liked this money anyway [+18] u/smart_doge: What’s the difference between Strait of Hormuz and Straight into Ber An00s? >!Straight into Ber An00s is Wide Open!< [+18] u/0DTEKing: Taco can’t afford market crash Can’t handle higher oil prices He keeps lying about everything War is still ON [+18] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: What is this? He is such a psychopath. He’s said nothing worth a shit. [+17] u/2c-b_day: 🥭 thinks the war is basically over 🤣🤣🤣🤣 [+17] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: #Many bears were lost in the line of duty today. But thats a sacrifice im willing to make [+17] u/swenau01: Wait guys is it possible that 🥭 maybe doesn’t know what he’s doing [+17] u/ercanbas: My favorite part of Trump speeches are the jokes coming from here. [+17] u/johannschmidt: He is so phenomenally stupid. [+17] u/Arnotts_shapes: Brent crude is nearly $100 a barrel again - stop this ride I want to get off. [+17] u/wenxuan2: Bols this bers that, if you only trade one way your fcked. [+17] u/JugoShvili: Wtf happened 45 minutes ago? [+17] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Correct me if I'm wrong but the us backing out doesn't really do shit? The strait may remain closed if Israel keeps attacking or even just to hurt the US right? [+17] u/mangofruitdude: Orange: "the war is over we won." Narator: "in fact the war isnt over" [+17] u/CriticalBlackberry90: Fake pump to create liquidity for CPI [+17] u/DCrebuilds: The US is going to insure anyone who goes through the gulf?!? Lmao get ready for fraud on a biblical scale [+17] u/vagabonds_cockring: I know the stock market doesn't care about me at all but this shit is starting to feel personal [+17] u/spellbadgrammargood: The American Dream: 1. Come to America 2. Go to local stores 3. Slip on spilled milk 4. Sue the store 5. Become Millionaire [+17] u/Disconn3cted: Oil is green. It's not over yet, bitch [+17] u/Les7X: Not trusting this shit. It's based on nothing, he can say whatever he wants with his piggy mouth [+17] u/NomSaneMan: Anyone else load up on puts at closed? Shorting this Fucking clown market [+17] u/ReftLight: This Trump guy will do anything to make people forget he's a pedophile [+17] u/sierratangocharlie: am I the only one on planet earth whose been following what the IRGC is saying [+17] u/svpa3991: So we kill Iran supreme leader. They recently install his son as their new leader. Prob wants revenge for killing his dad and this war is somehow over 🤔 [+17] u/jonneh: Tomorrow will we say that the dip in oil was a buying opportunity? [+17] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: Bro this dude's brain is fucking mush [+17] u/shmito17: This guy is 100% going to do everything in his power to avoid the midterms [+17] u/Smongk: So basically nothing changed [+17] u/SoloOutdoor: All this dude does is lie [+17] u/lessoninprogress: If spy opens below 660 I will start an only fans [+17] u/crimepais: Breaking: DJT awarded Nobel Prize for discovery of Pure Retardium [+17] u/PinealTone: Weekend War, Monday peace, Tuesday war, Wednesday peace.. etc. It like on, off, on. off button 🍊 is flickering the switch. [+17] u/yaboyay: #**SPY $700 TOMORROW, THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER! -🥭** [+17] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #bro got scared of high gas prices for spring break LMAOOOOO [+17] u/sitkaocean4444: Man Iran/China could really fuck Mango if they wanted to. He’s got himself back into a corner once again, the dumb fuck. Rising domestic inflation, economy on the verge of the shitter, rising unemployment. If Iran truly wanted to cuck the world’s oil supply (with the help of China) it would devastate Mango politically as inflation would SOAR here in the US. Nothing Americans hate more than paying more to put gas in their big stupid ass truck. He would get stomped in the midterms, and then reduced to a screaming infant with no power [+17] u/McKoijion: Al Jazeera's second most recent live update: > Stock markets across the Asia-Pacific are rallying as oil prices retreat from yesterday’s highs following Trump’s suggestion that the war could end “very soon.” Al Jazeera's most recent update: > Kamal Kharrazi, foreign policy advisor to Iran’s Supreme Leader, says there is no longer room for diplomacy with the US and that the Iranian army is ready for a long war. Something ain't adding up lol. [+17] u/Valkorion335786: Taking PTO at work Gonna frolic at the zoo in front of the Ber cage [+17] u/Ceyenne18: errr ... so what did mango achieve again? regime change? no nukes destroyed? no liberation of the people? no destroyed their ballistic missiles? no [+16] u/colinr813: Generals were telling troops this war was to start Armageddon last week and this week it’s over? LMAO [+16] u/trent_upscale: ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡿⠋⠀⠿⠇⠉⠻⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣶⣶⣾⡿⠟⢿⣷⣶⣶⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡏⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡸⠀⡄⠈⠁⣿⡇⢀⣴⣿⠇⠀⠴⠀⠀⣿⡇⠉⠁⢀⢠⠃ ⠀⠉⠁⢀⣠⣴⣿⣷⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣧⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣴⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⢀⠈⠉⠙⢿⣷⣄⠀ ⢠⣿⠏⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣆ ⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠐⠀⠀⢹⣿ ⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⢸⣿⡆⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠂⠀⢸⣿ ⢹⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠀⢿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡿ ⠀⠻⣿⣦⣀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⡟⠁ ⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣿⣷⣶⣾⡿⠿⠛⠻⢿⣿⣶⣾⣿⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀ [+16] u/svpa3991: “Covid isn’t real” “China is calling my phone for a deal” “Many many countries are working out a deal” “Now is a Biden/ my market” depending on performance” “There is no inflation” “No wars will be started” And now it’s this war is over 🤔 [+16] u/arbitraryBlue: War, no war. Delusions, no delusions. Just never forget that the Seahawks decided to pass instead of having Marshawn run it [+16] u/Commercial-District1: The worst thing you can do is come to this sub at night and let it influence you in any way. These people are nuts and always wrong. [+16] u/ajr901: This late rally is totally going to dump tomorrow, isn't it? [+16] u/dingusmingus2222: God damn I timed my puts perfectly. One minute before that tweet. I'm wrecked and the market is saved. You're welcome bulls. [+16] u/avva: 4 opportunities in the last year alone to retire and never work again. cant wait to miss the 5th [+16] u/Ble_h: You hear that? Affordability is no longer a thing, if you can’t afford things, it’s a skill issue. [+16] u/SquidKid47: Guess who didn't take profit on their oil calls today 🙃 I am truly regarded holy fuck when will I learn [+16] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: i mean oil ist still fuk...straight of homos still closed and oil fields burning [+16] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Lmao its actually set up to rug tomorrow: everyone will want profits or will freak the fuck out and sell all the shit they bought at the top today when war is back on [+16] u/jonneh: BRO THIS MFER CANT SAY THE WAR IS OVER [+16] u/jonneh: > **WSJ** > > 🥭 said the Iran war will be over “very soon” but that the U.S. military campaign still has further to go. [+16] u/SquidKid47: Switched to calls at the end of the day after my puts got reamed. I'm absolutely fucked lmfao [+16] u/orsomeshitidk: 🥭 couldn’t spank Minnesota but definitely almost complete with this war in Iran lol [+16] u/Unemployable1593: I’m old enough to remember when we pumped overnight and sold off all day [+16] u/orsomeshitidk: I uhh, don’t want my lifetime to take place through a changing of the world order. I have enjoyed growing up at the top, thanks. Would be cool if boomers don’t ruin all this shit on their way out. [+16] u/milodino12: I feel for the bers. They are the smarter side but who needs a brain in a regarded market [+16] u/McKoijion: There's no way commercial ships are going to attempt to cross the Strait of Hormuz without Iran's permission until a US Navy ship safely crosses through first. Trump needs to prove the Strait is open. [+16] u/NVDAismyg0d: Very competent government we have. The president saying the war is almost over and the military saying it’s just getting started [+16] u/Glock7enteen: If you think oil is high now, just wait until diddy gets released [+16] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: I don’t trust overnight pumps [+16] u/EducationalClient759: dear americans, i love your market. its strong like siberian tiger cock soup [+16] u/SergeantThreat: 🥭: Hey Iran, I know we blew up dozens of your leaders and refineries and schools, but we’re cool now, right? No punch backs! [+16] u/discgman: TACO Donnie at it again. I wonder how much his family made off the stock market today? [+16] u/bigmeatbag: The fuck prices Donnie thinks he lowered? [+16] u/spudbro00: Still can't believe Mango pulled off a 40 dollar oil dump, gotta be back over 100 soon [+16] u/jonneh: Just say whatever the fuck they want to hear bro. No one really cares if you contradict yourself later if you just say a lot of shit. # It’s a war, it’s not a war, but missiles are flying, it’s an excursion. It’s ending soon, but we’re not finished yet, we’re going to keep going until we’re finished. # *Fugayzi, fugazi. It's a whazy. It's a woozie. It's fairy dust. It doesn't exist.* [+16] u/Retaining-Wall: A bunch of 2000-lb.......bombs?.....on Iran. The way this bitch talks. Like actor who doesn't understand his lines. [+16] u/New-Leg8077: War over not this week, but very soon - Orange just answered [+16] u/jayyy929: everyone in this comment section (except for me) is a bunch of ego-filled homo’s [+15] u/KomradeKruschenko: Trump: war ending soon. Also Trump: We'll not stop until Iran is destroyed. Gonna level them with bombs? [+15] u/BallsHardest: "No country in the worlds allows mail in ballots" Not even a little tiny bit true. [+15] u/saintmitchy: I can’t for the life of me understand why people still believe him regarding anything [+15] u/platinumarks: Holy shit, he just referred to it as "SS Cole," like it's a British ship [+15] u/New-Leg8077: Lmao, I'm glad I bought puts at close [+15] u/Burger_Gouger: Oh it’s the ending of the beginning of the beginning of the end [+15] u/KimJongUnsTrousers: Red light green light. Welcome to the SPY games [+15] u/Kindly_Tackle_4685: Spy did a bip down to 640 after hours. Tomorrow's going to be a put day especially what's the world realizes the orange man just lied to them to commit insider trading [+15] u/SuffiecientSapian: I get to sleep beside a woman tonight, I told my mom I was scared [+15] u/Dorkasteri: Hegseth and Taco literally have no fucking idea what is happening in Iran. They just say random stuff in the media. I don’t think there is even a possibility to insider trade because not even the inner circle know what the fuck he is going to say next. [+15] u/Val44x: Truly a great loss for BERS today Gave up a -2% futures lead into a green close. [+15] u/GoZukkYourself: https://preview.redd.it/z41amyw4t2og1.png?width=1024&format=png&auto=webp&s=312b9b4a10d5c49d40e74a306f6e2f1b6671b388 [+15] u/Vast_Presentation909: Broo those last 30 minutes were such bs. I should have just kept out of the market [+15] u/ResidentPack4103: What if he 🌮s on the 🌮 [+15] u/kazkeb: Wrong week to quit taking Xanax [+15] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Its so funny how the market only believes trump when hes saying what it wants to hear [+15] u/Agitated-Lobster-623: "War is very complete" lmfao markets still listen to 🥭 [+15] u/No_Fig_7835: The "Mission Accomplished" vibes could not be stronger. [+15] u/bigmeatbag: How long before Donnie makes Jared the new Ayatollah? [+15] u/Objective-Plenty5185: Wait so did the US government short oil? [+15] u/bearhunter429: #I have one good day in the market: "I can do this for a living" LMAO🤌 [+15] u/Whole_Tea_4383: and 7 american soldiers just died for absolutely nothing. What a win mister president! People forgot about the epstein files so now we move on! [+15] u/gnanwahs: *Trump: Operation Epic Fury will continue LOOOOOOOOL [+15] u/DaFlyingGriffin: So crude oil went from $91 to $119 to $81 per barrel in under 12 hours. And nothing has fundamentally changed. [+15] u/Roflcopter71: Oh would you look at that, oil is going back up, who could have possibly seen that coming?!?!!!?!? [+15] u/yaboyay: Bought $1,200 worth of $674 calls @$.27. Sold at $.18 thinking I was getting out while I could. They closed at $4.70 and I would’ve been at nearly breakeven all time. Could’ve made $21k today. Fuck my chud life. [+15] u/patcakes: “Everyone, it’s okay, it’s okay. I’ve decided that the war is like, kind of probably almost over. 6 7. Thank you” -Donny T [+15] u/Scarfaceb1tch: -3% tomorrow for this little act of stupidity today [+15] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: So basically if 🥭 does leave the war basically he’s hurt multiple countries stock market, destabilized the middle west, left israel alone to fight against iran so they both bomb each other, got 7 soldiers killed and destabilized the world economy in 9 days [+15] u/Zachincool: guys is the new supreme leader gonna be nice to us since we murdered his entire family? [+15] u/teh_herper: #Where are the mfs that said money's rotating into oil now 🤡🤡🤡 [+15] u/sarcago: The guy literally just went live and said “Soon” and the market overreacted. They literally have no timeline for reopening the strait. [+15] u/JeronimoPearson: You can’t just reverse a war. This ain’t tariffs [+15] u/Bigamungus: Always arguing over bol fuk or ber fuk. Brother, we all fuk [+15] u/sonofalando: Seeing AI videos of fat chonker cats with mini guns. This is where my electric bill is going? 💀 [+15] u/drpa1n: If my boss asks me on the status of my project and I reply “it is very complete, pretty much” he would be right to assume that it is in fact not complete [+15] u/moorhound: AP headline: Trump says war is ‘very complete’ but it’s also ‘the beginning’ of a ‘a new country’ Newer AP headline: Iran fires drones toward Saudi Arabia and Kuwait Why the fuck would *anyone* believe this guy [+15] u/AngryGranny1992: Lmao hope you dumbasses didnt get bulltrapped. Orange man said war is over to save the market from crashing, but the reality is that its not. At about the same time the IRGC Commander Majid Mousavi officially stated: *"From now on, no missiles will be launched with warheads lighter than one ton".* If anything, things are escalating. Furthermore, still no ships going through the strait of hormuz... I I dont think Iran will just roll over and just be like yeah sure, after they targeted 20 of Irans hospitals, schools, police stations, civilian infrastructures, airports, oil plants, water desalination, double tapped a girls elementary school and killed their religious leader. Fking shit is a disaster waiting to happen. [+15] u/pineapplekiwipen: this 🤡 market giving out 10 baggers everyday with all this volatility [+15] u/jonneh: Uhh.. > **Islamic revolutionary guard corps**: Any Arab or European country that expels the ambassadors of Israel and the United States from its territory will, starting tomorrow, have full authority and freedom to pass through the Strait of Hormuz. [+15] u/OrdinaryMix4013: speaking to his uneducated retards lmao [+15] u/Commercial-District1: Stock market crashing? Announce we won the war. ✅ [+15] u/kalakesri: We are going to nuke them to prevent them from getting nukes. Art of the deal [+15] u/justarandumthrowaway: Subreddit rotation from r/wallstreetbets to r/povertyfinance [+15] u/McKoijion: Asians are finally realizing that it's not a mistranslation. Trump's speech really was just that unhinged. [+15] u/Ceyenne18: CPI -2% tomorrow The Golden Era has arrived. [+15] u/Impressive-Name5129: So oil isn't dead and stays above $90 [+15] u/jmc774: We had tariffs and war and the market is still showing strength...wtf are bers expecting to happen next [+15] u/Historical_Bother274: How the fuck are Americans surprised that the world hates them when they just bomb a country for the fun of it and declare victory?? Yes I lost money yesterday [+15] u/ComprehensiveKiwi489: Iran's Foreign Minister Araghchi: "Negotiations with the United States are no longer on the agenda. We are ready to continue missile attacks against them as long as necessary." [+15] u/thetalentedmrbowser: The war is over, world peace announced! AI has cured cancer and the economy is booming! [+15] u/Pretty_Ad_7885: why does this look like april drop? first he will poke an idea to see market reaction, like he did with tariff pause. then he will ignore it to see if it will continue to drop. then when it drops again he will confirm the first idea to be true. so i expect us to keep bombing everything and for the market to droping untill we hit a new low and then he will stop the war for real [+15] u/LarryStink: If you bought todays dip, congratulations. If you are holding that position expecting more, theres always wendys. [+15] u/LarryStink: Market taking taco for face value on iran is the same kind of denial as the guys who think the bartender being nice to them means she likes them.  Meanwhile force majeurs popping up left and right, the war rages on, and credit market is silently freaking the fuck out. Credit spreads are absolutely tearing, and the st Louis fed financial stress index is showing signs of concern. Weekly ADP tomorrow morning, sleep tight bols. And another note, the 6700 puts were monetized and rolled, meaning the 6700 support is now diminished and market can move through it without resistance. [+14] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: #Breaking: The war to be settled online in Call of Duty this weekend [+14] u/outhinking: In a few words : full war with Iran just started [+14] u/Even-Square-6246: Hahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhaha [+14] u/Jon472: The market really believes the war is in Trumps control to end? TF efficient market bullshiettt [+14] u/Voltthrower69: He’s going to say it’s gonna be over soon to pump shit like 10 more times. This is where we are. Manipulating on global conflicts where kids are getting killed. This guy has no shame and definitely diddled kids if this is what he’s willing to do [+14] u/platinumarks: Who the fuck taught this regard the word "excursion?" [+14] u/trainwreck001: CHECKED THE STRAITS.... YUP STILL CLOSED. OIL $300 [+14] u/arkeus1: So 🥭manipulated the oil price by declaring war will be over soon but couldn’t say how soon. And oil price came down because the war will be over pretty soon in the future? [+14] u/IlinistRainbow6: mfs will say “my port is up 100% this year” and have a total portfolio balance of $2,000 [+14] u/b1mm3rl1f3: Big bouncy oiled up titties [+14] u/icein2017: Regarded algos fell for Donny’s tricks again [+14] u/CallsOrPutsYES: #MISSION ACCOMPLISHED [+14] u/LouieM13: Alright that latest Trump truth social post was unhinged [+14] u/saccotac: That eod pump was fake & bulls are on track to get bagged tomorrow. [+14] u/Pale-Silver-8178: Oil again Iran not backing down [+14] u/humunculus43: I just dont understand how markets can be positive. The US economy is in terrible shape, and trump is full of shit and the war isnt over. [+14] u/gtheory1: Went from +160% in the morning to -1% today being a bear.  Guh [+14] u/KanonBalls: Sorry was gone for an hour. Did I get it right: Trump sets the middle east on fire, shuts down oil production, straight of hummus closed, ... He talks with Putin on the phone, both decide that it's time to end the war and Russia could make up for the lost oil production...?!?? ...??? Welcome to the US puppet States of America! [+14] u/Ret0x: I'm thinking of moving back in with my parents. [+14] u/-IQ200: Generational wealth was made & lost today. [+14] u/svpa3991: War is over but they still won’t release the actual casualty numbers 🤔 [+14] u/Specialist_Fig9458: One day on no news we’re getting a circuit breaker [+14] u/Bliqe: The market just moves with 🥭's mouth. This is all kinda gay ngl [+14] u/2020isgreat: \*IRAN SAYS HORMUZ OPEN TO STATES THAT EXPEL US, ISRAELI ENVOYS[](https://x.com/DeItaone/status/2031122089785094570) [+14] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: Moron called into CBS mid day because he panicked about the markets. That’s all he cares about. He has no actual plan. And this war is far from over. [+14] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: How much did we spend to replace Khamenei with Khamenei? [+14] u/Bapu_: so there is no plan for Iran, just vibes [+14] u/trainwreck001: I SAID IT BECAUSE I JUST DON'T KNOW ENOUGH ABOUT IT. LOL [+14] u/OrdinaryMix4013: the only thing finished is his fucking brain lmao what the fuck is he saying lmao [+14] u/SecretlyARaven: Damn USO ain’t hear no bell [+14] u/Unemployable1593: https://preview.redd.it/ji76fdu4r3og1.jpeg?width=4967&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=db37a7cc2c5f1b4b1aa7315ed2abeeb79480aa87 [+14] u/mysuruhuduga: Bears on suicide watch Bulls chilling with big booty latinas [+14] u/wsbnoob66: Bro triggered every auto response in the book [+14] u/soad1331: I gotta say. It's not that great stressing out 24 hours a day about the market... But at least I get to lose thousands of dollars in the process. [+14] u/Top_Cranberry_3254: In my 2 years of trading, today was the SECOND dumbest day I've ever seen, with the first being the false alarm last early April when everyone went gung ho thinking the tariffs were over, but they realized it was fake news and suddenly the spike in prices returned to where they were. The good news is that it was only a couple of days later though that it was official and stocks skyrocketed off a stupid tweet. I was going about my day, and I actually knew it was fake, tbh. Suddenly oil and shorts plummeted and everything spiked. I got the hell out of it asap because there is no way this war is over, but I didn't even read the news yet. I was guessing some BS headline came out and made people knee jerk react. The fact is what he is doing here is manipulating the market again. he saw Indexes and stocks down so he said it's almost over to bring them up. Disgusting. [+14] u/Unfamous_Trader: Ngl being an introvert in corporate America is hard [+14] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: #T shirts here: I survived the Oil crisis 3/8/26-3/9/26 [+14] u/Retaining-Wall: So fuck-knuckle has no idea how long the war will take. It seemed for a second like he was going to 🌮 but then he 🌮🌮, (or 🌮²), and the best he could muster up was "it's gonna end soon because it's basically kinda sorta maybe completely complete." So he has zero idea. This shit ain't over. ^(this is financial advice) [+14] u/Retaining-Wall: So 🥭 really thinks you go in there and say "this Strait is ours now, git fucked," and then it's under US control. And then the war is magically over. Please tell me he doesn't think it's that simple. [+14] u/Disconn3cted: During my sex ed class in high school, I was told that if a guy ejaculates in a pool and a girl swims in it, she can get pregnant. I was also told that if a guy cums in a girl's ass, she can get pregnant. That's all you need to know about American public education. [+14] u/DISAPPOINTING_FAIRY: JEWS STRIKE AGAIN HAHAHAHAHA [+14] u/NazgulSandwich: This is the problem with trading during a geopolitical crisis, you need to actually understand what is happening to some extent and the forces at play. Big T doesn’t even have the ability to 🌮 if Iran doesn’t give up and Israel is still hellbent on regime change. Trying to explain this to your average bull is literally impossible because their understanding of world events comes from call of duty, headlines, and vibes. Not to say it’s settled that this will keep going for a lot longer, but I know for a fact dudes went all in on longs after the headline today and they might get smoked. [+14] u/Impressive-Name5129: Bahrains only oil refinery hit And yet they tell me. Bearish oil 🤡 [+14] u/Ok_Cry7572: A women ceo ETF opened up recently. Generational shorting opportunity. [+14] u/Urzuck: A single tweet could dump this market into the oblivion or pump it to the moon, how do you honestly trade this shit lmao [+14] u/Pretty_Ad_7885: Yeah i aint buying this. Imma buy some oil calls. Taco literally said 1 hour later that US will fight untill the end. He is just spamming random words trying to move the market [+14] u/jackperitas: I don't ask much. I just want to be able to fucking delete my LinkedIn, buy a boring 3bedrooms in the middle of nowhere on a few acres and have enough on the stonk market to get 3k/month after taxes. Missed or paperhanded the dotcom bubble, corndog, bubble , gayme bubble, ai/nvda, metals, memory. For fuck's sake i'm bad at this [+14] u/aqjingson: When all you wanted was to break even premarket and now disappointed you didn’t make $10k by eod, greed is hell of a drug [+14] u/Ok-Adeptness6444: Im buying puts on 🥭’s life [+14] u/This_Possible_3942: "The world respects us right now, more than they have ever respected us before" 😂 [+14] u/Me-Regarded: 🥭 "this war is going to be finished pretty quickly now" [+14] u/Level_Counter3062: Is this speech why we pumped I'm so confused [+14] u/voidedhip: this speech is making me feel more regarded and broke [+14] u/CriticalBlackberry90: This man is a complete nutjob [+14] u/thewaterb0yyyy: A concept of an idea of a plan to maybe end the war soon [+14] u/theummeower: “They were going to strike first. I had information that they were going to strike us first” Aka Israel said I’m a big strong man who should attack first. So I attacked [+14] u/outhinking: So guys why did you vote for this guy [+14] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: Iranian diaspora cheered for mango to bomb their country for a week and replace their Khamenei with a younger and angrier Khamenei. Nice. [+14] u/cashflow_: IF I DONT MAKE IT OUT OF THE OPERATING ROOM FOR MY PROCEDURE WEDNESDAY CAN YOU GUYS PLEASE TAKE CARE OF REMY AS IF HE WAS YOUR OWN. HE LIKES TO BE HAND FED AND HE CANT SLEEP WITHOUT A FAN BECAUSE HE GETS HOT [+14] u/JohanLiebert92: “A Tomahawk is very generic,” 🥭 said, adding that “numerous other nations have Tomahawks.” are the numerous nations attacking Iran in the room with us? [+14] u/ConstantEfficiency83: Congrats retards, you’re exit liquidity now [+14] u/Hot_Philosopher_6558: Insider trading. Post trump admin has to investigate a lot of corruption [+14] u/Clear_Anything1232: Since the actual unblocking of strait is hard, there will be drip feeding of positive news G7 decides to use SPR France sending their entire navy to the strait G7 released the 100 barrels Majestic powerful G7 destroyers did a trial run of the strait Navy escorted a single tanker across the strait (the single part will omitted or exaggerated) Iran launchers destroyed 99.9999% Meanwhile, Pakistan has mandated wfh, India has mandated hold on commercial LPG cylinders and increased lead time for domestic refills [+14] u/ahx3000: Bro really said, United Slaves of Israel. You know what, he's not wrong [+14] u/WingWorried6176: lmao dont forget to sell today so we can do this all over again when spy dumps back to 660s [+14] u/fightoraccept: I'm actually getting tired of this kangaroo Market. [+14] u/SoloOutdoor: The day mango dies the whole world will have a giant party. Hell it might become a holiday. [+13] u/Comfortable733: THE VERY SKILLED AND TOTALLY NOT FLAMING SEC. OF WAR, UNDER MY COMMAND, HAS EXECUTED A TERRIFIC AND DEVASTATING BLOW TO THE ENEMY, ENDING THE WAR. THE PEOPLE OF IRAN ARE SAYING THEY’VE NEVER BEEN MORE THANKFUL, AND THEY RESPECT ME AND THE GREAT USA VERY MUCH. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER [+13] u/MrYOLOMcSwagMeister: This market truly is run by retards. You can't attack a country during negotiations TWICE, bomb the shit out of them and unleash toxic petroleum clouds on their capital and then expect them to accept your unilaterally declared end to the war. TACO all you like, they are going to keep launching missiles and drones [+13] u/OkResponsibility2470: When 🥭 said the war is over he meant it’s over as far as he cares, it’s the next admins problem to deal with now [+13] u/jonneh: Now 🥭 says we haven’t won enough.. mannn wtf [+13] u/itsnotshade: Listening to these speeches is actual brainrot. [+13] u/Waiting4Reccession: Mango is going to come out, market going to realize it was all just chat, and tmmrw we go red again [+13] u/Burger_Gouger: He’s going to make a call and hit the bomb button in 10 minutes isn’t he [+13] u/cityexile: Calls on 2030 Iranian paralympic team. [+13] u/dont_downvote_SPECIL: Amazing news fellas, the Latina at the Mexican restaurant I go to multiple times a week gave me her name: Isabela [+13] u/Unfamous_Trader: Coworkers that ask to get drinks after work are batshit insane. Got like 3-4 hours of free time after getting home from work, why the fuck would I want to spend that time with you? [+13] u/Axonum: The year is 2030. SPY is still trading between 675 and 690 as it bounces off 700 for a 3rd time this month. Your options expire worthless as the finish line is rugpulled right before your eyes. Theta gang wins again. [+13] u/PlataoPlomo19: Mangoman - War will end very soon. Meanwhile from Gulf News (UAEs biggest paper) in the last 3 hours - UAE residents get emergency alert over missile threat; Siren sounds in Bahrain; Saudi air defenses intercept missile and two drones; Kuwait intercepts 6 drones [+13] u/gainsusmaximus: Red at nights bulls delight has never been more tru [+13] u/jonneh: Who could’ve seen this coming? 😲 # > **Bloomberg** > > Iran said it’s “absolutely” not seeking a ceasefire in the war as it launched a new wave of missiles at Israel territories including Tel Aviv. > > The comments from Iran’s Parliament Speaker Mohammad Bagher Qalibaf come after 🥭’s assertion that the war would resolve “very soon.” [+13] u/Dr_Gauntlet: Puts overnight is free money. [+13] u/hallett21: Now watch me hit this drive [+13] u/Yousoldmetohigh: They always say you are one tweet away from blowing up your account. And thats what happened to me today. [+13] u/photosynthescythe: “The war is very complete, pretty much” That’s the kinda confidence I like to hear [+13] u/DebtOk4461: This sub is where I get my world news. [+13] u/Cerrado82: So oil no longer a issue? Yeah 100+ tomorrow [+13] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Lmaoo 🥭 accidentally said my 3rd term [+13] u/SergeantThreat: Imagine saying WW2 was over while we were still dropping nukes on Japan [+13] u/platinumarks: Dear God, this man thinks about trans people more than actual trans people do [+13] u/TheLelouchLamperouge: Dudes avoiding talking about the war [+13] u/whodey84: "Cheating at an inspirational level" - dude's brain just sloshing around in there [+13] u/Garbage-Disposal-938: Breaking: US voters think Trump's presidency "very complete, pretty much" and "there's nothing left" [+13] u/tandoori_taco_cat: The reverse taco, interesting [+13] u/MemeMarketRetard: Oil to 120 again tomorrow for 5 minutes just to make sure bers get margin'd. Then straight back to 93. [+13] u/GoogleKushforLunch: Iran - “The first ship try it off that news getting blown tf up” [+13] u/Infamous-Milk-4023: the soil was no match [+13] u/Retaining-Wall: God I want the day to come where the first question is "Mr. Prez are you fucking retarded?" [+13] u/NewDawn101: Oil going to $200 when everyone realizes our big orange fat is lying [+13] u/Ok_Wealth_3433: Why are you saying that? I don’t know enough about it lmao [+13] u/SadConclusion6017: This press conference is literally pointless [+13] u/Voltthrower69: “Many other nations have tomahawks” yet only two were bombing Iran. You fucking idiot. [+13] u/cashflow_: https://preview.redd.it/gbl7boh9o3og1.jpeg?width=2596&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d8dbd3605beda0019b3e2d3e3f7998ec74c0c964 [+13] u/SlyCooper007: This weekend taught me that no one in here knows fucking anything. Myself included. Literally just a bunch of retards and bots. [+13] u/radishr: Despite 🥭's ahead of schedule pronouncements, the straits remain closed, so oil is probably going back up. [+13] u/DefiantDelta: \#DraftBarronTrump #DraftKaiTrump #AirdropLindseyGrahamDirectlyIntoTheStrait [+13] u/ThermalChaser: The war is "very conplete" and "its just the beginning" Schroedingers conflict [+13] u/CD274: Planet Labs just issued press release saying there will now be a two week delay for commercial customers on satellite image over Iran, entire Gulf. Definitely sounds like the war is over [+13] u/drew-gen-x: Where did the world go wrong? The promised Blade Runner dystopian future is 10x better w/ replicants that look like Rachel Young & Darryl Hannah in their 20's. Instead we got this crappy AI dystopian future w/ anime vtubers w/girl voice changers that are actually old, fat & unemployed men that also chat on WSB. [+13] u/OrdinaryMix4013: everyone hates on China communist party, but they are planning for the next 10/20/30 years while this regard here is planning for tomorrow's McBurger dinner. [+13] u/animebeer: Stocks go up: “cool, I can quit my job soon” Stocks go down: “damn, gotta work harder, can’t get fired” [+13] u/kalakesri: Today everyone on twitter is a tomahawk expert all of a sudden (they asked grok) [+13] u/Chlo-Motion: I thought I was regarded but 🥭 is really on a whole new level of regarded [+13] u/kalakesri: is 🥭 going to go full schizo over losing to the ayatollah [+13] u/EarthquakeCrater: Exit liquidity Tuesdays [+13] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won --- /u/Alphtaku made a bet that AMPX would go to 15.0 within **4 weeks** when it was 9.56 and it did, congrats regard. Their record is now 1 wins and 0 losses [**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse) [+13] u/Street-Badger: So relief rally on war escalation / ‘navy may need to keep the straight open’.  This market is dumber than you are; there is money to be made, but it’s fucking exhausting. [+13] u/WSB-mods-are-: WTF you bastards told me to fill my basement with crude oil [+13] u/Affectionate-Tax9885: Damn, 7 service members really died just for this dude to 🌮 at the prospect of $120 crude [+13] u/Neat-Concentrate-239: At this point I believe stocks, commodities, and currencies are more memecoin than memecoins [+13] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: “We’ve already won but we haven’t won enough” 🌮 on 🌮? [+13] u/pleasestoptalkin: Calling it now: there will be an Oscar winning movie about a tomahawk missile with ptsd from hitting too many Iranian civilians. [+13] u/bigmeatbag: Lol Donnie said that $1k in a Trump account will be $100k when they are 18 lol [+13] u/GoogleKushforLunch: This deserves a -3% dump [+13] u/thewiggen: This guy is such a fucking retard [+13] u/PinealTone: lol.. all Iran has to to fly a hundreds of drones over the straits.. Good luck shooting all of them.. [+13] u/Bustcruster: It doesn’t really sound like the war is over [+13] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: He’s ranting about the 2024 election now? Holy Shit man let it go you psychopath [+13] u/Val44x: I’m so sick of trading in this market dictated by these clowns [+13] u/bearhunter429: #The irony when people on linkedin post anti-AI commentary but their commentary is written by AI LMAO🤌 [+13] u/toost1cky: Filled up the tank right before oil dropped, you’re welcome [+13] u/swenau01: Remember 90 deals in 90 days [+13] u/MuricanWisecrack: when trump says this war is over in 1 week, does that mean we have to prepare for at least 400 weeks of war, like with him going to end the Ukraine war in 24 hours? [+13] u/GoZukkYourself: I like my straits open, and my bers fuk. [+13] u/GuyFaulks77: Can’t make it any clearer. The war is completely, 100%, entirely, over. Almost. [+13] u/bearhunter429: #I can't imagine being a college student right now. Every job asks for 5-10 years experience LMAO🤌 [+13] u/NVDAismyg0d: Korea up 5% Japan up 4% China up 2% [+13] u/NFG89: Wake up sheeple, this war is just a distraction from Tottenham getting relegated. [+13] u/DeezSpicyNuts: Somebody better Tel Aviv to cool it down out here I don’t like paying more for car juice [+13] u/CigInside: Something sweet about watching billionaire pedo granddaughter use government resources to go to the country’s most expensive grocery store and hear her talk about how it will “bankrupt” her. [+13] u/OkResponsibility2470: Look on the bright side If there’s a recession 🥭 can just say there actually isn’t one and the market will pump [+13] u/rollinhating: so, markets pumping, 1 comment (which is a lie) made everyone forget the war and everything is fine again? [+13] u/ArchegosCapitalCEO: Ber are funnier than Bul [+13] u/Sick0h: 99% of investors: No fucking clue what the stock market did today. 1% WSBers: Bruh last 24 hours been crazyyyy [+13] u/Ceyenne18: bears still wondering why its pumping 🤡 actually, I'm also wondering why ... 😳 [+12] u/Jake43134: The next crash this sub calls for will actually happen. The 1000th time is the charm [+12] u/Noddite: Even if the US stops dropping bombs, do we think Iran stops or that Israel stops? No fucking way, this powder keg already blew up [+12] u/Bam2458: “Midnight Hammer” lol these fucking names [+12] u/DoubtStrange1430: Bro said its just beginning and very complete [+12] u/Endogamy: No trans…gender…..mutilization..of our children. No mutilization [+12] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: I know you can unilaterally declare war but can you just unilaterally declare victory while the other country is literally still actively able and willing to attack you? I’ve never ready this chapter in art of war. “Victory is achieved when you say it is” [+12] u/FullCuntalLobotomy: What will be viewed in history as the more retardeder moment: 1. Liberation Day 2. Iran war [+12] u/asetniop: #RENAME STRAIT OF HORMUZ TO GAY OF AMERICA [+12] u/Fickle-Necessary-438: Strait of Hormuz update: Ships Transiting Now 0 Last 24h 2 Normal daily avg 60 % of normal 3.3% Im no expert but those aren't great numbers [+12] u/Any-Background2739: my oil puts are gonna be so cooked man 🙂‍↕️ [+12] u/Affectionate-Day2743: i hope this bullshit is over, and i hope someone is held accountable for killing those 170 kids at school. that is fucked up. even if they are the "enemy" that is completely fucked up. even republicans know it's fucked up. someone needs to pay the price. [+12] u/Most-Crazy2353: The market still believing the fat orange fgt just shows how inefficient it is [+12] u/sirkarmalots: War over but we're reinstating the draft? something's wonky [+12] u/cashflow_: WHAT A WILD SESSION. THIS LEVEL OF UNCERTAINTY HASNT BEEN SEEN SINCE u/stupidber HAD TO FILL OUT THE RACE SECTION OF THE 2024 CENSUS [+12] u/ConstantSpace5809: Air raid sirens in Kuwait now due to war being over [+12] u/Mr-Bonnet: LOOK IM A BOL AND EVEN I HAVE TO ADMIT THIS IS SOME FUCKED UP SHIT [+12] u/AirwickS: Mission accomplished. We installed his much younger, healthier son -- who's no doubt out for revenge by any means possible. Let's see what actually happens with ships in Hormuz this week. [+12] u/Thedarkpersona: pack it up fellas, the war is over. No, do not look at the zealot in charge of one of the warring countries, who just had his wife, father and son (or daughter) killed by the other warring countries. Nothing to look at [+12] u/Fickle-Necessary-438: "Macron announces 'defensive' mission to reopen Strait of Hormuz President Emmanuel Macron on Monday warned that an attack on Cyprus was an attack on all of Europe and said France and its allies were preparing a "defensive" mission to reopen the Strait of Hormuz as the Middle East war entered its second week." That is escalation, New Supreme Leader finally in. I think we just getting started [+12] u/snspro: https://preview.redd.it/ajio21ux13og1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=80ee201636125b7105db672826e460d8587a559c [+12] u/This_Possible_3942: "We've already won in many ways, but we haven't won enough" 😂🤣😂 This guy [+12] u/John-AtlasGames: If I'm getting the message...the war will be over soon. But "we will not rest until Iran is totally defeated." So, uh, that seems to mean the war is not over, and maybe will even intensify if we want to get that "totally defeated" thing to happen "soon"? Maybe a fake rally today. [+12] u/cannythecat: Why is oil dumping lol. He's just rambling. [+12] u/Nice-Difference8641: so it was a fake taco the whole time? [+12] u/StrangeInsanity: This is worse than brain rot. Makes me want to unalive myself [+12] u/jonneh: 16 minutes and we’ll see what oil futures think of this “speech” 🤣 [+12] u/McKoijion: According to Drop Site News: > 🇱🇧 Nearly 700,000 people, including 200,000 children, are now displaced across Lebanon. The International Rescue Committee (IRC) warns the system is at a breaking point, with many families sleeping in cars or on the streets. The US basically just wants to suppress Iran long enough for Israel to finish their genocides in Palestine, southern Lebanon, and Syria, for Saudi Arabia to finish it's genocide in Yemen, and for the UAE to finish its genocide in South Sudan. [+12] u/Arnotts_shapes: Upside down man from Australia here This is bullshit - he crashes our market - turns around and says something non committal and Nasdaq go up? [+12] u/br0botic: When the market was open, the war was “very complete”. Now it’s “we haven’t won enough yet” Clown ass president lmao [+12] u/day1kobefan: WAR BACK ON UNTIL 4AM EST [+12] u/McKoijion: Dang, I thought Trump was going to call for a ceasefire and Iran would reject it. Instead Trump says that war is going to continue. [+12] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Iran is still doing Ramadan Imagine what they'll do when they are back on full ration, and can sin more freely [+12] u/FalconsBlewA283Lead: Before market closes: war is very complete After market closes: we will not relent [+12] u/2020isgreat: the masculine urge to place an irresponsibly large oil position [+12] u/Ok_Information_4137: Mango said war is not over why arent we dumping more after the pump [+12] u/mangofruitdude: God damn all this bullshit because a mf couldn't aim 2 inches to the right [+12] u/pootenanner: I’m guessing oil going back to the moon when Asia opens. [+12] u/clubdirthill: Surely there are serious adults in charge who will sort this all out shortly. [+12] u/colinr813: Never forget the bull euphoria of march 9, 2026 at 2 pm [+12] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Oil 200 within 2 weeks if the strait isn't straight [+12] u/mangofruitdude: The real reason we are up is obviously because melania movie is available for streaming. It simply generated tons of money. Some say the best movie ever [+12] u/NewDawn101: Dude be like no men in women sports then bombs an elementary school killing 300 kids [+12] u/ChickenYip: Our president lied to us? IRAN'S REVOLUTIONARY GUARDS SPOKESPERSON SAYS TRUMP'S COMMENTS ABOUT IRAN WERE 'NONSENSE' [+12] u/Proton404x: #Bulltrapped by the predident himself! Lmao [+12] u/Overall-Fold-9720: When you get drafted for Iran, just remember the war is already won [+12] u/SuffiecientSapian: I bought Panda Express yesterday and my fortune cookie said my biggest desire would happen soon. I wished for Iran war to end yall are all welcome. [+12] u/Joonypoo: -$1500 to +$950 on the same day on just shares wtf [+12] u/shower_optional: It's amazing that Taco still moves the markets on his words when we know that they mean literally nothing. [+12] u/account_not_active: i bought the dip on oil, 🥭 is too regarded to not say something stupid this week. [+12] u/Basis_404_: Bulls riding pretty high on a market that’s down week to date, month to date, year to date, and quarter to date [+12] u/abroadbroadband: If you're not where you want to be in life, there's no one to blame except # 🅱️iden. 😡😡😡😡😡 [+12] u/yaboyay: Will we see the DOW above $50k tomorrow? Downvote=No, Upvote=Yes [+12] u/McKoijion: > Reports from Iranian media and residents indicate multiple explosions across several cities as a fresh round of strikes appears underway. Trump didn't even wait 3 hours before resuming the bombings. [+12] u/OrdinaryMix4013: that presser today was more about taco trying to drown the reports of him gropping a 13 year old lmao [+12] u/Horcsogg: Well, I still don't see ships going through that Strait, that's for sure! [+12] u/Axonum: I guess it's Schrödingers War now... [+12] u/helicopter_pocket: I’m starting to get overconfident again, I smell another blown portfolio coming my way. [+12] u/kalakesri: Why are they not showing any footage from the rest of the middle east are we cooked [+12] u/Full_Boysenberry_198: The Boy Who Cried Wolf, but they keep believing the boy [+12] u/CardiologistEqual336: weak men create tough times [+12] u/WarmCan3034: I would like visualmod to stop spamming [+12] u/Mumblage: Imagine being banned this week of all weeks lmao 🤣 [+12] u/Hot-Walk-6334: Cant wait to see retards panic selling in a few days time again with the vix 30+ when they realise the war was in fact not over haha Will be green today with no pullbacks and loads of calls bought then 3 red days comsecutively after today. [+12] u/EarthquakeCrater: Some of you will be exit liquidity today and it shows [+12] u/rd26: Snagged a couple oil futures. Don't see anything about Iran or Israel saying it's over. If I'm wrong will take the loss, if not should print before EOW. [+12] u/Bam2458: So I think we could have gone without the live presser from a Florida retirement home. [+12] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: Oil could do the funniest thing [+12] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: Iran still has their enriched uranium btw 💀 [+12] u/McKoijion: Venezuela, Iran, Cuba? So we just gonna let Greenland off the hook? [+12] u/jstvndrpls: Unironically freaked the fuck out and panic sold my GOOG at the bottom yesterday [+12] u/mangofruitdude: Truth is nobody know shit. Bulls are just as retarded as bears they just don't know it. That said open the casino i want to place my bets [+12] u/Reasonable_Roger: $87 oil? That's practically free. [+12] u/pooterssssssssss: March 9 2026 will forever be know as "war could be over soon" market rally lol? [+12] u/ebfeebfe: \> Bombs the Ayatollah. \> Meet the new Ayatollah, same name as the old Ayatollah! \> War over, just kidding, but serious. Market goes to new ATH \> US now has a permanent military presence at the single most important chokepoint for Oil going to Gyna \> Orange man, how does he do it? [+12] u/pineapplekiwipen: iranians are probably confused af right now lmao [+12] u/platinumarks: Question: "Do you think this war will be over with this week?" 🥭: "No, but soon." [+12] u/platinumarks: He's claiming that no other country has mail-in voting like us. Canada has mail-in voting as an option for all voters on request... [+12] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: lol Donnie is OK with WW3 but when gas is getting 10 then we all super friends [+12] u/Overall-Fold-9720: That shit is going down faster than my wife on my bestfriend [+12] u/SquirtleStomp: These bears are scaring the hoes [+12] u/neutralpoliticsbot: wish we could vote on which country to invade [+12] u/bearhunter429: #I just found a job at a tanker ship. Sounds like a great opportunity. We are headed somewhere called Hormoz. Can't wait. LMAO🤌 [+12] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: I have turned into ghey ber please forgive me bol [+12] u/Bin_Jin: Is his speech on the teleprompter? It looks like he's free-styling his greatest bars. [+12] u/PleaseSirOneMoreTurn: Presser over, orange in chief shit himself. [+12] u/vwboyaf1: "It's the beginning of building a new country" Oh man, you libertarians got fucking bamboozled hard. [+12] u/Val44x: Says war is like pretty much done idk Market instantly injects billions One hour later says here is our plan to continue the war Market keeps all the money pumped into it, sells off a tenth of a percent [+12] u/GoZukkYourself: USO fading like hope and dreams of ber. [+12] u/Slow-Information-847: Oil is back above 90. X has new Tel Aviv videos today, not recycling the old ones. The war seems on-going. [+12] u/ten7four: The 3 month SPY chart is disgusting [+12] u/thrillho145: Why do markets believe Trump anymore? [+12] u/Icommandyou: Ceasefire at market open Back at war at market close Rinse and repeat [+12] u/llasar17: What? Huh? Oil? Who said somethin' bout oil, bitch, you cookin'?" [+11] u/hey-coffee-eyes: "The war is very complete," I say, as I finish putting my Risk pieces all on Australia [+11] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: Ooooo we going back down Today was exit liquidity [+11] u/Paul_Robert_: Remember folks, Daylight savings is short for Day trade your life savings 🔥 [+11] u/ZenForU: Trump tomorrow: I never said that the war is close to being complete. [+11] u/trumpdiego: ##MISSION ACCOMPLISHED BANNER FLIES OUTSIDE WHITE HOUSE [+11] u/Fresh_Internal_6085: This isn’t so much of a speech as it is a monty python skit. Utterly fucking deranged. [+11] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: so no gays and he ends with most gay song on the planet [+11] u/Neel_Crashkari: Mango boofing ketamine again [+11] u/astromouse2024: Let’s send a WSB rep to the White House press briefings ‘Thank you Mr. President, calls or puts?’ [+11] u/peanut-britle-latte: Trump is an incredible market manipulator. [+11] u/According-Page8618: and spy already lost half its gains today in 20min aftermarket [+11] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #cant acomplished all objectives when you had no objectives to begin with lmao [+11] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: Iran foreign minister saying dialogue with the US will not remain on the agenda [+11] u/WillasTyrell: the war is over when israel and iran say it is, you can’t taco your way out of this one dumbass [+11] u/Independent-Tree-985: Just like a Mango-magician, everyone is following the hand with the deck of cards in it instead of the assistant moving backstage [+11] u/jiggolo420: Bagholding 200K of oil futures. I might actually have to take this delivery, gentleman 💎 ✋️ [+11] u/CardiologistEqual336: 🥭: “War is over, or something” Iran: “lmao nah” [+11] u/Nanas_700k: Red futures at night, tomorrow will be alright [+11] u/Long_Dong_Silver6: Iran baiting an aircraft carrier into the Strait because they have a strategy to sink it there. [+11] u/Cav829: Annnnnd oil looks ready to push up again. [+11] u/BlitzComet95: Gonna buy SPY leaps (1DTE) tomorrow at open [+11] u/NVDAismyg0d: All Donnie had to do was just say “the war will be over soon” and bears lose their entire networth [+11] u/Ok_Worldliness_2902: Cheer the TACO all you want, but remember, in war, the enemy gets a vote, too. [+11] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Mango: War is over Vitol Execs: Pretty much everyone in our industry strongly suspects the war has barely even started. [+11] u/somanyvegetables: kinda felt we would end flat... going up 1% is fucking nuts. [+11] u/Urzuck: There is no war in Ba Sing Se [+11] u/NomSaneMan: *Nukes exploding in the background* US cabinet: “You’ve done it Donal. You’ve saved the world again. Pretty much” [+11] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: i mean yeah but oil supply is still fuked [+11] u/SergeantThreat: 🥭’s family made millions on polymarket bets and all it cost was 7 American soldiers? He will take that deal every day of the week [+11] u/GermyBones: Long oil, orange man bullshittin on Iran being over. [+11] u/zestykite: im gonna go buy a barrel of oil. its only thing i can afford. final play [+11] u/Retaining-Wall: In reality, I imagine he and his friends are loading up on puts, and tomorrow he drops the bomb on Iran or some dumbass shit, and then fuck your calls. [+11] u/Knightguard1: These markets make absolutely no sense. [+11] u/ProudPeak3570: mango saying the war is complete but petey is saying its just begun [+11] u/outhinking: Wait ormuz is still closed actually [+11] u/Pale-Silver-8178: The War is just Beginning - 24h ago The War is almost Over - few hours ago Barron bought the dip and told daddy to flip the script [+11] u/Worth-Athlete-9953: He's getting oranger. [+11] u/27onfire: This orange asshole is so fucking stupid. This presser is so much worse than covid days. The way he answered the tomahawk question and before that.. the best the best best, are you kidding me? [+11] u/FuckleUp: Market is even perplexed like what the fuck do I do with 🥭 presser [+11] u/bigmeatbag: Donnie said the tomahawk missile that blew up the girls school "could have been anyone's". Is he telling us to buy more calls on Raytheon RTX because they can sell them to anyone now? [+11] u/pineapplekiwipen: thank god iran war and the ai bubble narrative didn't hit the market simultaneously i'm not sure SPY would've survived an iranian ai bubble [+11] u/Bichael-Murry: [ Removed by Reddit ] [+11] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #Too many thirst traps here imo [+11] u/Me-Regarded: Last night was more fun. It was a ber orgy in here, all positive this time was different and the end was upon us [+11] u/trsx5: CAN WE STOP TWEETING FOR LIKE A WEEK SO I CAN UNLOAD MY BAGS? [+11] u/louis-debroglie: Still not seeing any tankers get through except the odd Chinese one here or there [+11] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Mfw the war is still happening [+11] u/barkwoofgrrr: Lol how in the fuck do people still take what 🥭 says at face value [+11] u/tesseramous: Not OIL pumping and dumping 40% in one day like a meme coin... [+11] u/ilwb: I'm never doubting taco again [+11] u/averagenoodle: Was bagholding $5k in calls since early Feb, down 85%. Woke up this morning, said fuck it and averaged down a fuck ton, made it out green [+11] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Straight of whormuse aboutta get filled with antiship mines [+11] u/OkResponsibility2470: “We’ve already won in many ways but we haven’t won enough” - 🥭 [+11] u/ILoveTheAtomicBomb: Amazing how the market eats trumps lies every time. It’s not timing the market, it’s timing TACO moments [+11] u/Spear_n_Magic_Helmet: Nothing good has ever been done while wearing a lanyard [+11] u/mightychicken64: uh so I loaded up on puts after market close [+11] u/Bilbo_Butthole: WSB bought puts this morning [+11] u/outhinking: Asian market about to remind you ormuz still closed [+11] u/KittyLover-7: Now you’re probably wondering, was any of this shit legal? Abso fucking lutely not [+11] u/CasherburyTales: Bro launches war, don’t tell allies, then goes on blast for the allies not joining? [+11] u/Eggs-Benny: He didn't even mention Iran LMAO. DOWN WE GOOOO \*UPDATE\* I was wrong and dumb. Here is the presser: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD30gZvnzW0](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD30gZvnzW0) [+11] u/mardigrasmoker: What a steaming pile of nothing. [+11] u/boris1869: Just stop now, grandpa [+11] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: Went from unconditional surrender and mango selecting the new supreme leader to “job is done” in 2 days, noice [+11] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: “I’m demanding very bigly that you agree to unconditional surrender” “No” “Okay can we be friends then?” [+11] u/Czyzzle: Just scalped 27 gallons of premium [+11] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: "Iran has tomahawks" holy shit [+11] u/colinr813: “War is almost finished, pretty much.” And yall ate it up. They call you gullibols for a reason. [+11] u/FearlessTrader: Golf ⛳️ has to be the most idiotic, fck all sport ever! I have never played it in my life and still did incredible the first time I played it. Such a low skill level is required, I can’t… [+11] u/Ok_Wealth_3433: Puts on sga can’t stand that cornball [+11] u/sha1dy: # RENAME STRAIT OF HORMUZ TO STRAIGHT OUTTA COMPTON [+11] u/No-Improvement3164: Just think, we have 3 more years of this [+11] u/WingedScapula420: Betting against Timothee Chalamet winning an Oscar is probably gonna be my most profitable position this week [+11] u/HandsomeTod11: For a strait, the Hormuz is acting pretty ghay [+11] u/noaholic: The good thing about not having puts is that you don’t have to hope for reality bad shit to happen [+11] u/winston511: Anybody who has ever said they trade with a strict set of “rules” or a “system” has never made a fuckin penny of realized gains [+11] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: i think its officially >!gay!< o clock [+11] u/Overall-Fold-9720: Us saying the war is over Iran saying the war is not over You guys need couple therapy [+11] u/sonofalando: Bessent about to blowup his account shorting futures 🤡🤡🤡 [+11] u/RobertPaulsonXX42: Mission Accomplished Electric Boogaloo [+11] u/FreonJunkie96: The great oil boom of 2026 March 8-9 [+11] u/Wolski101: I bought puts at 10am today and evidently saved the world economy. Might double down tomorrow so expect a 3% jump. APR 17 SPY p 660 [+11] u/RoverV: Another war ended by 🌮! [+11] u/SxeySteve: "Mutilization" The Bush-ification is complete [+11] u/ercanbas: They did not say finish the job. [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: All we’ve done is stomp on the ant mound a bunch. Nothing has been accomplished that would increase our ‘safety’ or change anything at all in Iran. The Israelis won’t be willing to stop here imo. [+11] u/Usedillusion7: He doesn't believe it. He's playing pretend. [+11] u/Voenker: Very nice OIL dip to buy. [+11] u/peanut-britle-latte: Puts on the son of the shah [+11] u/_pout_: Don't worry if you missed the dip. You'll have a hundred more to choose from. [+11] u/2020isgreat: There are concepts of a war ending [+11] u/Far-Requirement9180: Oh boy, this little pump doesn’t feel right tbh lol [+11] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Ladies and gentleman, it has been an honor serving with you. I am fuk. Good day. [+11] u/RelationshipShort460: "I eat pieces of shit like Iran for breakfast" [+11] u/Thebaxxxx: I was 16 when i first played WoW and that shit was magical going down into the snow gnoll cave as a dwarf. Everything was just so cool bro. I was just this little dwarf in a big magical land :D [+11] u/Overall-Fold-9720: >Trump contradicts himself on Iran repeatedly in just a few hours - CNN Markets : I just felt like pumping [+11] u/vandammes: WHERE IS MADURO LMFAO [+11] u/LostandConfused2024: I’m bullish as fuck but i don’t understand the pump. All news is saying the war is going to continue [+11] u/Ok_Advantage_8153: So the US killed the supreme leader. His replacement.  His son - whose dad, wife and child were also just killed isn't likely to be positively predisposed to the good ol' US of A. Even if 🥭 declares victory a country of 90 million people is capable of slinging infinite shaheds at refineries and oil tankers as a 'fuck you'. Tl'dr Iran also get to decide when this is or isn't over. [+11] u/CPR123_: So WWIII is priced in. Got it [+11] u/SergeantThreat: This final season of the USA really jumped the shark [+11] u/dub_soda: Someone right now is saying “Sir, how orange would you like to look tonight?” VERY FUCKING ORANGE YOU IDIOT! [+11] u/outhinking: All I have to say is CALL ON USOIL [+11] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Everyone piled onto calls? Fuck it, let it drop. [+11] u/Ok-Flatworm-3397: Mango dropping a ‘probably’ pumped spy 1% [+11] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Futes didn't get the memo that the war is complete. [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: No way Israel is done right? They accomplished nothing but swatting down the wasps nest. [+11] u/Williamnguyen62838: Omg it’s just a war, you guys so dramatic [+11] u/LyeeRoy: I will hibernate through this storm [+11] u/AirportMaterial5917: no because why is usa in its messy era [+11] u/GuyFieriFrostedTips: 🥭 considering easing Russian oil sanctions. You can’t make this shit up! [+11] u/skychief99: When they arrest me and remove me from office, they're using solid gold handcuffs. The most valuable fantastic and wonderful handcuffs really. Nobody has seen handcuffs like this before. Winning!!!!!! [+11] u/orsomeshitidk: Shits been a fuckin’ bummer non stop since 2015 dude we need to revolt. Occupy Wall Street redo type shit but less retarded this time. [+11] u/platinumarks: LOL, he's basically reneging on the promise to escort ships through the Strait [+11] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: Holy Fuck he is so stupid What the fuck is this? A victory speech? He has zero idea what he’s doing [+11] u/WillasTyrell: alright so what if israel and america say we’re done but iran’s like no we’re not opening the strait we go fuck ourselves? they dictate the terms of the end of hostilities? vietnam part 3? [+11] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #breaking: EBAY up 500% AH after Prez suggested you can buy Tomahaks missiles on Ebay [+11] u/hfbvm2: For all the retards who didn't read in detail >However, a meeting of G7 finance ministers and the International Energy Agency (IEA) ended without an agreement to release strategic crude reserves. > [+11] u/astrawberryandakiwi: I just went 70% cash. Things are too chaotic [+11] u/platinumarks: It's sad when people like 🥭 use propaganda tactics to get more power. It's even sadder and scarier when you realize that, unlike most propagandists, he actually BELIEVES most of what he's saying. It's not an act most of the time, it's literal insanity. [+11] u/zestykite: futures realizing the war is in fact not over [+11] u/kemar7856: If Iran does anything that stops the flow of Oil within the Strait of Hormuz, they will be hit by the United States of America TWENTY TIMES HARDER than they have been hit thus far. Additionally, we will take out easily destroyable targets that will make it virtually impossible for Iran to ever be built back, as a Nation, again - Death, Fire, and Fury will reign upon them - But I hope, and pray, that it does not happen! This is a gift from the United States of America to China, and all of those Nations that heavily use the Hormuz Strait. Hopefully, it is a gesture that will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your attention to this matter! This man is dropping the fire and fury agian 😭 [+11] u/burneraccount1819: Never bet against corruption boys [+11] u/Valkorion335786: WSB full porting USO at open today doesn’t help dispel the stereotype about us lmao [+11] u/092Casey: So he manipulated the market by falsely claiming the war is almost over? 😂  This war is far from over... [+11] u/Gom_KBull: *The past weekend was a huge warning light flashing.* **Bols:** "Huh, probably nothing. Just the wind." # ╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭ [+11] u/LostandConfused2024: Bers fucked. **AGAIN** [+11] u/BadBoyBilbo: No, no. You go ahead, SPY. I’m *very* convinced this is real. I *totally* believe you. [+11] u/Powerful_Mission_655: Why do i feel the market will tank again overnight [+11] u/Val44x: I’m sad BER bros Really Thought we would at least retest pre markets lows instead of straight pump all day then that eod pump lol [+11] u/Specialist_Fig9458: I am way too fucking old to be listening to phonk music when I work out what I’m I even doing LMAO [+11] u/NotMe357: Today is the first signal TACO wants to TACO 👍 [+11] u/rdblaw: Lmao we all should’ve known when the market went green today it was Trumps goons front running the announcement… could’ve made bank [+10] u/2020isgreat: wait did he just forget about the actual press conference lmfao [+10] u/WillTheGreat: I said it because I just don't know enough...this mother fucker lmao [+10] u/Jadedtrader33: Once you realize all price action is both fake and gey only then can you make money. [+10] u/ConstantEfficiency83: Enjoy your new higher low. Next stop is 650 gay bois [+10] u/DallasBoy95: https://preview.redd.it/p42hqc2nu2og1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8437027d022caf1b8474373cb46968bfaf93a24f Hope you enjoyed your little three day fun, but it’s time for the bull market to continue. [+10] u/DISAPPOINTING_FAIRY: I think the craziest part of today was the way algos immediately took his word at face value [+10] u/Fresh_Internal_6085: *“Did I say the WAR was complete? No no no..I meant the BAR is complete..you know..the bar in the beautiful, glorious ballroom I’m building..’* — 🌮 [+10] u/memelackey: God damn bull mafia in here [+10] u/greyenlightenment: Futures will dip as always as soon as ppl realize the war will not be over as soon as trump hinted at [+10] u/ShadyPotatoTrader: Afghanistan took 20 years and we lost to the Taliban. Trump beat an Iran, a country 2.5x larger in 10 days. Trump would never lie about anything related to wars. [+10] u/MrNo_Balls: alright, did this pump because trump said that the war is almost over? [+10] u/Thesaint7811: Calls and puts printed today, I feel like Oprah gave me a car. [+10] u/2020isgreat: Trump: We won't relent until the enemy is totally, decisively defeated.[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2031112844414988424) [+10] u/SergeantThreat: Of all the wars that aren’t over, this one is the most not over [+10] u/UnivalveX: the classic -2% to +1% reversal. bers hate this one simple trick [+10] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: fuk last nite we were like in WW3 and now we peace? [+10] u/Western_Persimmon230: So we didn’t win, war is not over, hoor muz is still closed… got it [+10] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: Donnie got oil scared...Iran has him by the oil pussy [+10] u/SquirtleStomp: Maybe I'm just an ugly fuck, but the looksmaxxing trend seems dumb as hell [+10] u/AGigatonicxs: When oil dies gold shoul rally 10% [+10] u/Scarfaceb1tch: You are going to get rugged so hard tonight [+10] u/TheOriginalBIG: It's as if 🥭 devised a 🌮 out of thin air, truly the most holy regard of our time [+10] u/maximuminimum: That’s a wrap folks… strait of whoremutz lubed up on oil again, with cargo going in and out… bulls win [+10] u/Upset-Motor-2602: American Journalists are no better than Stenographers. Absolutely no critical analysis or reporting. Just parroting whatever is fed to them. Case in point, Weiji Jang reporting Trump's comment on the war verbatim with nothing to back it up. I didn't have short positions because I was fully expecting Trump to pull some shit like this today, after what happened in April last year with that Bloomberg reporter. [+10] u/NeedToMakeMoneyz: BRO NO NEWS LOL RUGGING [+10] u/isolated-cat: IT'S THE BEGINNING OF THE END [+10] u/RecordReal123: Lol, pure market manipulation press conference 🤣 [+10] u/br0botic: The elections are dishonest and corrupt! (except when he wins) [+10] u/bearhunter429: #Last night oil was $120 and now $88 just as I predicted (both cases) LMAO🤌 [+10] u/alfred250: Ever been to a dinner party and met a career academic/pseudo-intellectual wearing a $100 suit, struggling to pay alimony but still talking down to you? That is a bear in real life. [+10] u/Throwaway18987987: I am a gas station owner. I didn’t charge my phone last night so that if oil prices went down today I could plausibly say that I “didn’t hear about it”. LMAO [+10] u/baadllama_ghost: well i guess we won the war guys, congratulations to everyone [+10] u/randomnameforme123: IT WILL TAKEEE FOREVERRRRR FOR OIL TO COME BACK DOWN!!! OIL MAY NOT SEE SUB $90 THIS YEAR!!!! lol [+10] u/colinr813: Futes said “fine, I’ll get the oil myself” and started drilling LMAO [+10] u/colinr813: Why has Jimmy Carter been dragging the market down the last few days? [+10] u/day1kobefan: "THEY WOUDLVE HAD NUCLEAR WEAPONS WITHIN 2 WEEKS" [+10] u/Retaining-Wall: Guy is like your neighbour who is perpetually 7 drinks deep, dumb as sin, but somehow has money. [+10] u/Moepenmoes: How the fuck is it possible that some words of some orange man can completely flip markets? How is it any different compared to gambling? [+10] u/trainwreck001: JUST CHECKED... THE STRAIT IS EMPTY OIL $300 [+10] u/FuckleUp: My marriage is mostly over but we still love each other and will remain married [+10] u/mangofruitdude: Our military launched the Tomahawks the biggest the best missiles evrrybody says so unbelievable missile they hit exactly where we want, boom, perfect. Iran thought they could mess aound, but when you mess with America bad idea very bad idea we hit back fast and we hit backk huge. People are saying, “Wow, nobody does it like the United States,” and frankly they’re right, nobody even comes close. God bless the united states Thank you for your attention to this matter [+10] u/Ok-Application5904: Since when does a new Honda Pilot cost over $55k?! Insane [+10] u/Appropriate-Run-7490: Whoever said money doesn’t buy happiness is retarded [+10] u/Aromatic-Ad-6244: Does anyone else feel like being alive is becoming more of a fucking chore every day? [+10] u/Same_College2053: Anthropic was right on the money with refusing 🥭. It turned from Iran bombed the girls school to Its Ai's fault REALLLLL FASTT [+10] u/Country_Gravy420: Iran announcing opening the strait soon. Israel calling for ceasefire. Things could get ugly [+10] u/SergeantThreat: Israel calling for a ceasefire in the scariest thing a country can hear [+10] u/randomnameforme123: "Oil rises fast but takes forever to fall" "Prepare for a 2008 style crash" Fucking retarded bers man like how do they even remember to breathe in the morningv [+10] u/Zestyclose-Bit271: One thing i don’t understand, has iran said anything? is the strait even 1% more open than it was yesterday? is this even a little based in reality? [+10] u/OnTheWaterWagon: Imagine a boxer lands a couple decent punches in round 3 and decides he’s won. Climbs the ropes, blowing kisses, celebrating. The bell rings for the market open on Tuesday. 🥭 is still celebrating when he eats a left hook he never saw coming. LMAO [+10] u/Locke_____Lamora: Nobody can yap like this guy lol [+10] u/pineapplekiwipen: the good news is now everybody forgot about the ai bubble [+10] u/throwawaydonaldinho: While Im working the Wendys dumpster, keeping the customer busy, my buddy siphons gas from their car We quadrupled our income. Recommend. [+10] u/2020isgreat: Iran should open the straight then close it again just for shits and giggles [+10] u/CriticalBlackberry90: Does anyone have a goddamn clue what the fuck is going on anymore because I surely do not [+10] u/gonosz11: Bro the president tricked me into buying 687Calls for this friday :((((( [+10] u/rocier: Bers mad, redditors mad, Patriotic bulls win again [+10] u/2020isgreat: Closing my oil longs under the thesis of I want to go to sleep [+10] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: Overnight pump = dump during the day [+10] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: I would say war is over day before boots on ground [+10] u/wildcat1055: \- It's more fun to sink them! \- their ships? \- Your portfolio [+10] u/McKoijion: > TRUMP ANNOUNCES REMOVAL AND ADDITION OF 100 MILLION BARRELS OF OIL FROM VENEZUELA AND WARNED THAT NEW IRANIAN SUPREME LEADER MOJTABA KHAMENEI WILL CREATE CONTINUED PROBLEMS FOR IRAN. Lmao, does he mean 100 million barrels total? Because Venezuela pumps out less than 1 million barrels per day. > South American nation’s tar-like oil is what many Gulf coast facilities were built for but ramping up production to 3m barrels a day will be a long game https://www.theguardian.com/business/2026/jan/05/venezuelan-crude-oil-appeals-to-us-refineries [+10] u/cashflow_: Went to the anesthesiologist pain specialist today. They’re gonna do radiofrequency ablation on two of my nerves next week on Wednesday. They’re gonna sedate me with propofol the good stuff [+10] u/cryptohorn: I ate 6 street tacos for lunch and I feel like a fat slut rn [+10] u/bigstew6: Crazy day in the market today, eh? [+10] u/bullhunter469: Bears are FUCKING QUITE AS FUCK tonight lmao Lmfao [+10] u/cryptohorn: A $36 dollar oil swing. Efficient markets guys [+10] u/McKoijion: You know how Trump said Biden or Harris would get us into a war with Iran and vice versa? I don't think any of them were lying. They all work for AIPAC and that's what AIPAC wanted. [+10] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: so Iran won? thats the vibe I am getting [+10] u/TheOldRamDangle: One of you tards mentioned on another thread that you would “film yourself eating shit” if the market recovered today. SHOW YOURSELF COWARD [+10] u/OrangMiskin: The rambling of a retarded old man [+10] u/givemethestars000: Trump says its pretty fun to sink ships [+10] u/kvmcc: I think my portfolio is almost gone, pretty much. [+10] u/The_Real_Jafar: Mango thinks he’ll win the midterms [+10] u/bearhunter429: #Ber comments from last night aged like sour milk LMAO🤌 [+10] u/PushAble2463: If you bought anything today I probably used you as exit liquidity 😎 [+10] u/jda823: Whew. I was afraid I was gonna miss on an overnight +3% pump. Biggest nothing burger press conference ever [+10] u/brute-forced: Imagine believing anything these fuckers say… Oil will be $150 a barrel less than a month [+10] u/EnginrA: Big bouncy oiled up titties! Lots of oil! [+10] u/trsx5: Why the fuck are bears ruining the party every night [+10] u/KittyLover-7: Bers talking about oil to 200, vix to 50, posting circuit breaker levels yesterday 🤣🤣🤣 [+10] u/Pale-Category6035: Nothing makes you wanna rage quit more than going into a trade and it goes against you immediately and exponentially 😭 [+10] u/TokiAsuma: When people realize the war is nowhere near done yet we going right back down [+10] u/arigold940: tons of regards falling for the bs trope of the war is over lol. shits not done, yall just keep getting fooled by orange & he can’t stand seeing a red market. all manipulation [+10] u/platinumarks: He's not speaking like the war is over, saying things like "we will hit" etc. [+10] u/2020isgreat: This doesn't sound like a victory speech [+10] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Green at night bol fuk 30 min after open [+10] u/Imaginary-Writer-125: How are they communicating with the son of Khamenei? Ouija board? [+10] u/Disconn3cted: Best case scenario Iran breaks out in civil war with 5 different tribes bombing the ships. It's not over. [+10] u/yaboyay: $665 puts are back on the menu smh [+10] u/ThaddeusJP: Calls on "I did that" stickers on gas pumps [+10] u/dingusmingus2222: I think I'm getting dementia listening to this... [+10] u/Mumblage: Oh my god. He is so fucking regarded [+10] u/piss_stored_in_balls: The memes were right last night. Green by EOD [+10] u/curling_rocks: This could have been an email [+10] u/DCrebuilds: "War not over this week" lol ok [+10] u/PNWPlayZ: so last night's dump is back on the table? [+10] u/masonk69: Incoming +2.5% move tomorrow [+10] u/punxphil27: Jim Cramer just said to sell everything [+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: the elementary school taco bombed had an copy of the classificed Epstein files for sure. [+10] u/wrongrobertpatrick: Not an expert here, but have fun trying to get a decentralized military to surrender Communication and navy gone — no problem [+10] u/Mean_Bumblebee1945: This does not sound like peace... [+10] u/Difficult-Level7038: "very complete, pretty much" WTF does this mean [+10] u/DonDiabloTheGreat: So when dinosaurs decompose they turn in black goo that we pump into our cars? [+10] u/ArcDogRob: Diesel at $7 and gas at $5 here in CA. And it’s only a week in. Imagine when it hits over $3/gallon in bumfuck Kentucky. [+10] u/aaapod: imagine your legacy being covering up crimes of pedophiles and calling the top of the stock market before global recession [+10] u/Most-Crazy2353: You dont seem to remember last monday [+9] u/GuyFaulks77: We may never have another red day. Today was so illegal [+9] u/day1kobefan: WTF IS HE TALKING ABOUT? I NEVER KNOW WHAT HES ON [+9] u/mods_ban_me: Not even kegstand is this stupid lmao [+9] u/mangofruitdude: Pathetic how they stand there clapping and sucking off trump lmao [+9] u/jonneh: Goddamn, I’ve never actually watched 🥭 on C-Span, I usually just see the coverage that cuts in and out on CNBC or Bloomberg, but this mfer says the same shit over and over again. # Almost like he’s trying to convince himself that what he wants to believe is true. [+9] u/definatelynotme321: Every speech is just a mangled mess of nonsense [+9] u/PleaseSirOneMoreTurn: “We didn’t start the war, but we are going to finish what we started” - Donald Trump essentially. [+9] u/orsomeshitidk: It’s almost tick season. I hate them fuckers. [+9] u/EnginrA: I’m down to my last $1.25 million what do I do [+9] u/mandoslambo: If he mentions boots on the ground its over [+9] u/rdr31: So fkn bullish https://preview.redd.it/zweskgyg13og1.jpeg?width=836&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f5962df68503201773e1b5d02b4cd18fae4fb977 [+9] u/Throwaway18987987: Difficulty has been set to expert mode [+9] u/jonneh: 2 more minutes til futes and we’ll see what’s what. This mfer just says whatever to prop up the market 🤣🤣 [+9] u/zeusbox: Lot of successful cuban people in this country. Like Mark Cuban. [+9] u/trumpdiego: So the supreme court said tariffs were illegal, so he tariffe'ed even harder and said that he's not giving anyone money back even though the court is pretty much guaranteed going to say you gotta give money back... and then he started a war randomly? Did I get that right? All well SPY rallied like 5% over the course of 5months? [+9] u/yushey__: Life is an easy mode for Barron Trump [+9] u/BerryExpress: khamenei is dead! long live khamenei! LMAO [+9] u/softboiledjadepotato: Excellent use of time last night calculating how much my puts were gonna print... [+9] u/IllBuyYourCar: 🥭called anyone bullish on oil a retard last night Then proved his point LMAO this mf don’t miss [+9] u/jmc774: 🌮 trade is a cheat code wtf [+9] u/skychief99: Is this yet ANOTHER war Orange Julius has stopped? That makes 9....right? LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Winning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [+9] u/eerhmahgerd: The first time he ever heard affordability....somebody get grandpa off the stage. It's pudding time [+9] u/Ok_Wealth_3433: Bros just saying random numbers lmao [+9] u/memelackey: I think tomorrow I'll buy even MORE puts LMAO 🤌 [+9] u/KingRegardothe2nd: Someone use AI to make a Mission Accomplished image of Baron Trump with a 3000% gain on calls [+9] u/isolated-cat: SAVE PORTFOLIO ACT under this act all your portfolios will be saved by getting added to the group chat [+9] u/Lucky-Sentence-3491: Mango: “okay Bibi I helped you start this war, now go get their uranium” Bibi: “no you do it lmao” Mango: “I don’t want to do it 😕” Bibi: “…” Mango: “job is done people, war has been won!” [+9] u/tesseramous: Bears: "AI is a bubble" AI: \*compresses an entire war into 1 week\* [+9] u/MaresATX: What the hell was that [+9] u/Paul_Robert_: Shout-out to that random guy in the weekend thread, who predicted the whole -1% then +1% SPY movement [+9] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Like a whole war going on and 🥭 talking about dell [+9] u/ihopethisworksfornow: “Yeah guys as soon as we get this little war driven oil crisis wrapped up we’re gonna start hitting ATH again” [+9] u/SquirtleStomp: "They had the highest inflation in history, probably 48 years, but highest in history, probably 1700%" [+9] u/Overall-Fold-9720: war is "very complete, pretty much" *George W. Bush having flashbacks of 2003* [+9] u/JakeSal10: Soon, not days or weeks but soon [+9] u/Disconn3cted: If anyone wants to know why the market is recovering, it's because I sold my entire portfolio. You're welcome [+9] u/Aldribuds: Traditional Persian men's clothing looks comfy AF [+9] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: Visual mod on a rampage [+9] u/2020isgreat: I'm starting to think you can't end a war just by saying it's over [+9] u/killerbeeswaxkill: Wouldn’t be surprised if the wars back on tomorrow after Barron and his groupies bought their puts. [+9] u/OrdinaryMix4013: not even he can believe the stupid shit that comes out of his mouth lmaooo [+9] u/pineapplekiwipen: 🌈🐻 now cheering for iran to continue the war so their $500 puts can print shameful behavior [+9] u/neutralpoliticsbot: Never listen to the bears EVER! They were contemplating WW3 and destruction of society at night like if you keep reading this bear drivel you start to believe it too. Bears are always wrong. [+9] u/PNWPlayZ: i cant listen to this. this is why i stopped trading weeklies. [+9] u/hfbvm2: We all agree, if trump tacos, 2 weeks after the war ends iran will test the nuclear bomb? [+9] u/ebitdasga: So just finished watching the speech, how did we go from -3% last night to +.7%? Doesn’t feel like it’s closer to ending [+9] u/Voltthrower69: Holy shit that reporter is a goat for asking about the kid killing [+9] u/Legitimate_Cable_811: This just in, bers bet on a total collapse outcome which everyone is trying to avoid and gets mad when they lose. [+9] u/sylphvanas: Are you fucking serious? We’re going to open red again, huh? Everyday [+9] u/31andnotdone: my charging port got wet this isnt a euphemism [+9] u/eudaimonia_dc: Did VisualMod just become sentient and realize its channel is full of regards? [+9] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: This a good distraction for troop movement [+9] u/KittyLover-7: Even as a bull I think is coming right back down tomorrow 🤣 [+9] u/ServeValuable6460: Make $1k, lose $2k until you’re down to $0 [+9] u/AvocadoPurees: Cool, if we hit 700 after this it'll be the most psychotic thing to rationalize ever [+9] u/mardigrasmoker: I literally can’t with this guy. He’s so regarded I can’t help but laugh. Laugh and get my money stolen. At least I’m laughing. [+9] u/platinumarks: "As we continue Operation Epic Fury" -- WAR'S BACK ON THE MENU BOYS [+9] u/Flat-Focus7966: A day when 675 felt like 725.... [+9] u/PalpitationFrosty242: that's it? He just speaks it and the markets believe this shit? Who tf is buying????? [+9] u/BerryExpress: my god the shit hes spewing is just surreal [+9] u/McKoijion: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doublespeak [+9] u/whomakesthetendies: Oil going to hit $150 tomorrow before we get another TACO Tuesday [+9] u/severed02: Cramer is on a generational inverse run the past few days [+9] u/McKoijion: Every other month's CPI numbers are being delayed. Combined with the Polymarket insider trades, the wars being started on Friday nights/Saturday mornings, the speeches delivered when futures markets are closed, etc. and it seems clear Trump is doing everything possible to manipulate stock markets into seeming less terrible than they actually are. https://www.cnbc.com/2025/12/18/trust-these-numbers-economists-see-a-lot-of-flaws-in-delayed-cpi-report-showing-downward-inflation.html https://www.morningstar.com/economy/delayed-cpi-report-show-persistent-inflation [+9] u/DeezSpicyNuts: You know that feeling you get when you’re going up a flight of stairs at night? Like something is silently creeping up behind you, faster than you’re moving up the stairs? It’s there. Don’t look at it. [+9] u/kalakesri: 🥭 really belives China can't pass the strait. he is in his flop era [+9] u/Thebaxxxx: Oil doesnt just fucking drop 60 dollars a fucking barrel in a day. Sorry not sorry 😠 > This is a further sign our markets are manipulated beyond comprehension. > Oil went up becouse people began shorting it. It went down becouse people bought the futures. > i guaranfucking tea you that no one in the supppy chain has paid a dollar over 65 a barrel since the start of march, and thats a high number > if even a single regard with 200k went short on oil today they would have single handedly kept the so called "spot price" above $100 for another day at least. > There is no such thing as a fair market [+9] u/tendiemountain: What did we learn yesterday? Buy the fucking dip. [+9] u/zg44: Nobody tacos like Trump. Calls went bananas. [+9] u/Comfortable733: GENERATIONAL BAGS FOR WSB COMMODITY BULLS 🤡🫵🤡🫵🤡🫵🤡🫵🤡🫵 [+9] u/ConsiderationKey1658: he needs to speak from four seasons total landscaping [+9] u/WombatShwambat: I swear the longer I look at him the more orange he gets [+9] u/MakeResonableChoices: Do you fuck with the war? Do you know about Pangea? [+9] u/Bravadette: Pretty hard to be confident in any overnight trades rn... no news. [+9] u/Potential_Version_34: How long until trump has a “very good” phone call with Mujtaba? [+9] u/randomnameforme123: Wow bers are fucking retarded huh...not even a theory anymore just pure fact [+8] u/Level_Counter3062: We have actually reached liberation day level VIX without virtually any correction lmao [+8] u/jonneh: So basically, whenever 🥭 has a phone call with Putin, be prepared for a 🌮 [+8] u/FormalCompetition118: BREAKING: Trump declares the Strait of Hormuz to be renamed the Strait of Melania [+8] u/ConfederacyOfDunces_: We are going right back down tomorrow This man is a fucking moron [+8] u/McKoijion: Bill Ackman genuinely believes Iran bombed their own elementary school. Well, at least that's what he's promoting on Twitter. [+8] u/WalrusHonda: Nah. US will be in / dealing with Iran for 3-5 years [+8] u/Mumblage: Do the Irayniuns know war is over? Did they get the memo? [+8] u/dunkeater: Time's up, crayons down. Bears, please turn in your filled out Wendys applications. [+8] u/elld425310: "Unconditional surrender" hahahaha 🤣 Why do Americcucks always think they can win war in a region no one likes them? [+8] u/OrdinaryMix4013: not gonna lie, i do want to see an oil crisis to remind people of their fuck up. [+8] u/hermeskino715: Bols need another 🌮 interview/press tomorrow where he says everything will be okay [+8] u/GoldenAries4: It’s in the best interest of way too many big players to get the strait opened. I don’t think other countries are just going to eat insane oil prices and high inflation. France already sent some warships. Iran will get piled on, pressured, and isolated. This is not something they can just keep up imo. [+8] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Lol how does 🥭 make korea and japan use their circuit breaks and the rug pull oil Like this is the dumbest market [+8] u/dingusmingus2222: So let me get this straight. Some random reporter just has to tweet about a phone call with Trump and the market moves over half a trillion in an instant?... I'm not so sure 401ks aren't a giant scam... [+8] u/Bravadette: Don't you love it when people act like Cuban people's suffering exists in a vacuum and isn't a product of embargoes lasting decades [+8] u/SergeantThreat: Time to attack Cuba, take out Castro, have another Castro take power, and say mission accomplished [+8] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #"Regime changed completed! We replaced a hardliner with a hardliner! see under new mangement!" clown 🌮 [+8] u/mandoslambo: Man think about the lucky teens that are in his inner circle with all this insider trading. If any of them dont finish their internship as multi millionaires they must be retarded [+8] u/Longjumping_Tree6561: Apparently that was not the actual announcement [+8] u/Bubbly-Form-7059: Holy shit it’s been 5 hours since I last checked wall street bets [+8] u/Aggressive_Bit_91: Where were you during the great oil spike of 3/9 [+8] u/SergeantThreat: Back in my day a premature Mission Accomplished announcement came with a cool banner on a battleship [+8] u/randomnameforme123: Genuinely in shock at how wrong and stupid bers are? "Cant taco this mess" "oil will never be below $100 again" "2008 will look like a joke" And you already know these same retards will be in here next weekend on some new bullshit, acting as if they understand anything lmfao [+8] u/randomnameforme123: Hmm should I buy one dip and just be set for life? Or should I fomo buy puts like a retard contrarian? Oh gee this such a hard choice - Spastic Bers [+8] u/MrNewking: Imagine loading up on puts in the morning 🤣 [+8] u/eerhmahgerd: So he's just repeating his state of the union speech? That it? [+8] u/Val44x: Trying to trade on market fundamentals when your a single incoherent and incomplete sentence away from being blown the fuck out But then you think ok what if I trade based on random interview statements that are taken as gospel? Because apparently billions of dollars can be injected into the market within milliseconds due to a hand wave statement. [+8] u/cow_grass: He saying a whole lot of nothing to address the oil issue. Ofcourse [+8] u/bm_mane8: He sounded nervous at the end tbh [+8] u/JohanLiebert92: war is over until his master Netanyahoo says it is. imagine leaving the only ally you have left in the world, not gonna happen. [+8] u/Specialist_Fig9458: Bent crude at 98 what the actual fuck is this LMAO [+8] u/aftherith: So the fearful foreign poors sell it off at night and then the American wealth liquidity hits and buys it all the way back up. Interesting. [+8] u/BunsMcCheeks: Yanno that orange bitch really unlocked the infinite money glitch. He surmised the general public are a bunch of cattle and will eat up almost anything. And he was right. [+8] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: Spy gonna open 666 for us [+8] u/unhappyreach_: You hoes seent this? >If Iran does anything that stops the flow of Oil within the Strait of Hormuz, they will be hit by the United States of America TWENTY TIMES HARDER than they have been hit thus far. Additionally, we will take out easily destroyable targets that will make it virtually impossible for Iran to ever be built back, as a Nation, again — Death, Fire, and Fury will reign upon them — But I hope, and pray, that it does not happen! This is a gift from the United States of America to China, and all of those Nations that heavily use the Hormuz Strait. Hopefully, it is a gesture that will be greatly appreciated. Thank you for your attention to this matter! President DONALD J. TRUMP [+8] u/naija123456: Been having a good strategy trading the month, but its hars to trade consistently this orange fucker. One tweet or memo about bullshit can flip your trade upside down in less than 5 minutes [+8] u/givemethestars000: The sewage pipes in tehran are shooting out fire and gas. Place has turned into a fuckshow of a shitshow. Fuckin hell [+8] u/CinnabonNPurpBlunt: That feeling when you realize we couldn’t even get a new regime in neighboring Venezuela a country with 1/3 the population and surrendering peacefully compared to a country across the world with 3x the population and actively bombing neighbors left and right [+8] u/TheBlueBlaze: He's really mutulizing the word mutilation [+8] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Same bro... same. I started drinking at 4 pm due to 5 digit loss. [+8] u/pooterssssssssss: Today was a trading day that will be remembered for years to come, similar to liberation day. T saw a collapsing market and economy and said "fug this we out" just to try to get a pump... so he could give some liquidity to friends... Hows this market soo stupidooo? [+8] u/Retaining-Wall: So is this gonna be a double taco gordita snackwich or not? [+8] u/pootenanner: Mango literally only did that shit to insider trade. He’s gona have all the liquidity before his term ends. And print more of course. [+8] u/zestykite: tongiht we will really see if its almost over. [+8] u/Much-Management9823: YOU 🫵 bet against the house again, didn’t you? Silly bear [+8] u/Haboubiii: After Trump spoke about the end of the war approaching, Channel 15 Hebrew said a senior political source: We haven't finished anything in Iran yet, and our estimates from the beginning talked about a war of at least two weeks. [+8] u/SergeantThreat: The war is done, but the 82nd Airborne is gonna go do a special military operation. In and out in 20. Quick adventure. [+8] u/_Wendig0_: Not over until Bibi says it's over. You guys should know this. [+8] u/trumpdiego: mfs really be blowing each other up, but all agreeing that the spice needs to flow [+8] u/whomakesthetendies: Has the price of oil ever doubled in a day? [+8] u/nyse25: not even a -1% dump like yesterday bers are cooked beyond measure [+8] u/LarsTarkas: Get ready for many more conferences of the war almost being over [+8] u/redpillsbluepills: Oil gods, please let my USO $95 4/17 puts print [+8] u/kalakesri: If there were any crossings in the strait they would share 4k footage of it we might be cooked [+8] u/smart_doge: Lot of 2-3 digit karma bots in the sub tonight [+8] u/Automatic-Mountain45: what bs will he say next to calm the market...because he can't pull off another "the war is complete" [+8] u/Flat-Focus7966: There were 2 Things that told me to buy like no tomorrow this morning 1) This post https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/uY02Bouliv 2) Cramer telling people to sell Glad my thesis worked [+8] u/After-Run5174: I think today finally broke me as a ber lol. Horrible future-looking economic indicators and the market just goes up no matter what [+8] u/Jumpinmycar: What if the real profits were the losses we made along the way? [+8] u/kalakesri: Choosing a dead guy as your last leader is an epic way to go out. Iranians would’ve been good shitposters 🫡 [+8] u/Pretty_Ad_7885: I think the war isnt about over. Will spy now dump 2% because i said that? [+7] u/BallsHardest: What is Mengo trying to say by playing a song about boning young dudes in a gym as he left? [+7] u/Gom_KBull: # Bols need 🥭 to tuck them in, # kiss them on the forehead, # and tell them "everything's fine, mommy's here." [+7] u/Late-Tadpole-2318: Guys. I think they broke something [+7] u/EyeSea7923: Think it's more of a media gimmick. It seems like the new trend is to pump commodities and rug pull. [+7] u/ihopethisworksfornow: Guys I’m actually like so fuckin good at predicting shit, just look at this: https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/eIDaXsvc3s > I’m realizing that at one point mango is just going to declare that the strait of Hormuz is safe and that will cause at least a temporary massive Shrek dildo >When though https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/s/feGwNP1Cj7 > Monday morning, 9:15AM: >Mango tweets a rocket emoji >Markets rally 3% >9:29 AM: Reuters reports the U.S. has launched a massive missile strike on Tehran. Markets drop to -2%. >12:30PM: >Mango tweets mission accomplished >Markets end the day +1.3% Like that first one was just correct, and the second one was a shitpost but the second half and the open/close are like exactly what happened today [+7] u/NVDAismyg0d: War is done. Who do you believe, the president of the United States or boxMuncher69xx420 [+7] u/Dizzy-Green-3188: The war is over loves already won ❤️ [+7] u/Cav829: I honestly have no idea how any of you make decisions on your wealth based on this rambling, inconsistent, fat, old man. [+7] u/scooterhomeimprover: So yet the scam continues. [+7] u/ebfeebfe: If the DOW keeps going, Epstein Island will be legal again by next week [+7] u/dataCollector42069: Bears are fucked. So glad I exited on a dip [+7] u/Ancient_Sort5820: Wait what the fuck happened today? I decided not to check today after seeing futures last night, then i finally check and im up over 1.5%?? [+7] u/Jaded-Plan7799: He went taco again coz people went crazy on gas prices. Lmao [+7] u/Responsible-Rip8793: Hang the god damn banner [+7] u/Burger_Gouger: Bro pretty much said the epilogue is complete. Main book, chapter 1 is beginning [+7] u/Kickboy21: In so fucking stressed from life and my job i need a drink badly but i also have acid reflux [+7] u/SilverPrivateer: Meeting with European leaders "failed" after Trump started by asking everyone present what they had thought about the Melania movie [+7] u/Austin_Destroyer: Caaan't wait til he says something along the lines of "I didn't say we were done" and claims to be taken out of context and sues for defamation or some stupid shit. [+7] u/TheJacen: Who here is on the toilet [+7] u/bearhunter429: #The fuck happened in the last hour? I stepped away when SPY was down almost -1% and now it closed up 1% LMAO🤌 [+7] u/bluen: Iran gonna become new Israeli ally 🥳 [+7] u/Sudden-Smoke-8377: lol straight of homos [+7] u/Neel_Crashkari: I have a girlfriend, she just works nights so you guys never see her [+7] u/Yory_Alsik: We're going to rip today, " [Jim Cramer](https://www.cnbc.com/jim-cramer-cnbc-make-it/) said investors should not jump the gun on buying stocks despite Monday’s market turnaround" [Cramer: Investors, don't make any sudden moves on the market's Trump-fueled rally](https://www.cnbc.com/2026/03/09/cramer-investors-dont-make-any-sudden-moves-on-the-markets-trump-fueled-rally.html) [+7] u/linnanetheman: Sold spy at the very top, my dick is literally blowing muck everywhere [+7] u/The_Real_Jafar: Will you guys clap for me [+7] u/Cav829: Uh oh, guys. I think they realized it's not over. [+7] u/browsingonly71: Room hot, to poor to turn on AC [+6] u/Thewolfofbearstreet: Like Wall Street is going let us degenerates have a market crash that allows to build generational wealth buying the dip [+6] u/brock2063: "Prediction is very hard, particularly when it's about the future" -Yogi Berra [+6] u/dingusmingus2222: I'm pretty sure this retard just used being Palestinian and Iranian as a slur. [+6] u/AvocadoPurees: What grinds my gears the most is the fact that even news sources like AP is like "surprising reversal on crude prices". You mofos knew exactly what happened and why it happened 🤡 [+6] u/StonksInvesteur: habibi, are you winning? [+6] u/clay5049: How dare he talk to dear leader that way [+6] u/dub_soda: One day people will literally be hiding in a barn somewhere FOMOing into SkyNet stocks as the machines are hunting them down [+6] u/Valkorion335786: Ber reposted “Kony 2012” 14 years ago in an attempt tot sundown a Ugandan warlord [+6] u/Independent_Shock_15: There is no war in Ba Sing Se [+5] u/version-two: Im a bull, but these puts are gonna print. And I wont be saying thank you. 🍆 [+5] u/BallsHardest: Honestly kinda tragic Epstein isn't around to see what he accomplished for Israel. [+5] u/trsx5: Bought a future contract 1 minute before oil started to rally. AMA [+5] u/Valkorion335786: Started the day staring at a a thousand dollar loss, got back from meeting to see I ended the day up $300 LMAO