▶ Full Post Text
[+66] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: The comment above me is clearly poor
[+44] u/Dull_Broccoli1637: If there are nukes flying, the only thing to survive are my student loans
[+42] u/WSB-mods-are-: 7:30 +1%
8:30 +2%
9:29 +1%
9:30 +0%
[+41] u/hiphopanonomos: I just don't buy it that everything is resolved this week and we all pump happily ever after
[+39] u/Commercial_Seat_3704: Life was so much better when we didn't have to hear from the president every single fucking day
[+34] u/ConstantAd1: Gas at $4.
Enjoy your freedom, F-150 owners.
[+30] u/Necessary-Lychee-486: I don't think I've ever seen coordinated fraud on this level. This is truly insane.
[+28] u/le_pedal: Christ, reading these threads you'd think we're down 20% in premarket, when it's actually green
[+28] u/Iunatic: WSB is only bearish after the drop and is only bullish at the very top
[+25] u/BarberQuarter: Concepts of a ceasefire
[+24] u/JohanLiebert92: Iran: 🥭 is negotiating with itself
LMAO
[+24] u/Jacobpapi: Holding cash, dont trust this green
[+24] u/cevapi_jelopy: This taco doesnt feel right, sold half
[+24] u/Jealous_Archer_4522: Just got laid off from my night shift job behind Wendy's. With all the new young $CORN bros in the mix, nobody wants old tired ass anymore even if we have years of experience.
[+23] u/Large-Photograph-286: As i see it, this 15 point deal isn't supposed to go through, thus giving 🥭 the justification to put boots on the ground and escalate on energy
[+23] u/31andnotdone: The amount of people who don't know the difference between straight and strait is amazing.
[+23] u/Basedshark01: Maybe she's getting flown out to Miami as a friend
[+22] u/Poptart_Salad: Absolutely unreal that these gains have held. Market just doesn't care about anything Iran says or does. Or troops moving, strait still being closed, shortages, east Asia about to do fuel rationing. Nope. One man with the biggest ego ever and his social media account, thats it.
[+22] u/kim82352: > Reuters: Iran military spokesperson says US is negotiating with itself
[+22] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: I’m dead serious. I’ve put on 15 lbs since I learned about this sub
[+21] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Believe it or not balls
[+21] u/Aranthos-Faroth: Fuuuuuck man this sub used to have comments with actual brain cells but now it's just degens with $50 portfolios repeating:
* Sell everything
* Buy everything
* Top is in
* Bottom is in
* Dump incoming
[+20] u/leeuwvanvlaanderen: I hope this ends soon so the Iranians and Americans can get back to what really matters, fucking over their own people
[+19] u/polosocks12345: Idk. Fighting is continuing and expanding. Puts.
[+19] u/General-Elk-6537: I'm waiting for the rug pull.
[+18] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: In the morning, I hand wash my plate so my wife has to unload the dishwasher
[+18] u/MyDogsNameIsTim: If ur reading this ur gay lmao
[+18] u/awetfartruinedmylife: Nothing screams peace deal like ordering more troops to the Middle East
[+18] u/brute-forced: CNBC has turned into Fox News
[+17] u/CEO-of-SOXL: Market isn’t even following the news correctly. The simulation is glitching.
[+17] u/PicklePot83: “Hey Gemini, make me a peace plan with like, 15 different points.” - Marco
[+17] u/soa333: Markets are forward looking to 🥭 truth social posts.
Fundamentals are gay
[+17] u/cannythecat: The entire market since the great depression was just one giant dead cat bounce and we are going back to Dow 41.22, the bottom of the Dow in 1932
[+17] u/rollinhating: Iran doesnt give a fk about the world economy, they just want 🥭 and israel to suffer for what they doing.. They dont want a ceasefire/peace deal because oil is high etc…
Have yall seen their currency? its toiletpapper since like forever
[+16] u/Knarre30: What even is this shit. We pump on exposed lies?
[+16] u/_Doomer_Wojack_: Fucking morons think 🥭 can taco out of a war. This is not some tariff agreement you clowns
[+16] u/Retaining-Wall: Yeah as soon as your mum gets here.
[+15] u/D1finalboss: Cease fires, peace talks, going well
*rockets, drones, missiles firing in the background
[+15] u/neo-futurism: Bols be like "But he said a deal 🥺🥺🥺"
[+14] u/Superente_: Say it with me: Bers are fk
[+14] u/Fhyzikz: One day it's going to come out that all the suspicious market activity was not just any insider but Bessent trying desperately to pay off the national debt by doing insider trading in the US Treasury Robinhood account
[+14] u/civillyRange: News cycle:
Turkey sending back channel messages to Tehran to hammer out a peace deal
Pakistan sending back channel messages to Tehran to hammer out a peace deal
Iran's military rejected 15 point plan LMAO
[+14] u/Pale-Aspect-6221: Obviously Iran was going to reject. 🥭 gives his offer. Iran gives their offer. They compromise. Then Israel attacks out of nowhere then Iran attacks the US then the US nukes them then we all die under pounds of ice
[+14] u/TheMostAverageDude: Oil is fucking down as we send in the 82nd?
[+13] u/Top-Meaning2626: Bro, I was in the wrong thread
Calls
[+13] u/Urzuck: We might see the biggest TACO ever pulled off.
[+13] u/Logical-Clerk-1571: behold the quantum negotiations, it is real and fake at the same time
[+13] u/The_BakedCrusader: I know the market has been red for 4 straight weeks and all, but it baffles me that SPY is up 1% because we SENT a peace plan. Not that a peace plan has been accepted by Iran or a ceasefire has held, but the it's been sent to them. That's also ignoring that more and more troops keep getting sent over there and that Israel heavily doubts this peace plan.
[+13] u/knoqd_: 👁️🏃 said fuk your ceasefire
[+13] u/CATLLM: I only trust news on WSB - everything else is fake
[+12] u/Smart_Influence2966: calls on rigged markets, manipulation and corruption
[+12] u/ibetyouliketes: Bears got Dreamcasts instead of PS2's as children
[+12] u/baadllama_ghost: jesus, what did all you retards buy puts yesterday?
[+12] u/sck178: Could you imagine how high SPY could have been if 🌮 didn't do exactly TWO things over the last 11 months? Just no tariffs and no war that literally every president avoided since the 70s because of this exact and very foreseeable outcome
[+12] u/drpa1n: Bol swallowing lies like they will soon have to swallow cum to survive
[+12] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Omg I’m about to be euro poor and I’m American
[+12] u/Basis_404_: Bulls really do think that oil being up 56% in 3 months is a nothing burger
[+12] u/patelchief90: Iran rejected ceasefire lol wtf 🥭 thought it would haven right away
[+12] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Quitting the casino is easy, I’ve done it 1000s of times
[+12] u/Frozen_Shades: [Breaking News regarding Iran](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ?si=mVYEU3u4LiMelSqB)
[+11] u/FearlessStatement144: Just read a Reuters article that said Iran said the us is in negotiations with themselves. Let’s see if we can get past the 200 again today.
[+11] u/ThrowRA-KB: lol Iran has already declined negotiations with the US. Of course it was bullshit
Do not call your defeat an agreement’ IRGC warns US, Israel - Al Jazeera
https://aje.news/ve6pos?update=4432929
[+11] u/Opposite_Engine_6776: Bears are negotiating with themselves.
[+11] u/Disc0Disc0Disc0: Ok so again a fake ceasefire which pumps the market, Iran again says no chance and the pump stays? Lol
[+11] u/hv876: Listening to CNBC talking heads. They’d make you believe economy is healthy because record earnings, tax cuts from OBBB and deregulation.
Bros, economy is fuk because jobs and housing market suck ass. Oh and these same companies with record profits are laying people off. In 6 months they are all going to wonder why no one is buying their product.
[+11] u/Fernyfern7: This rug pull was promised to me 3000 years ago
[+11] u/Spear_n_Magic_Helmet: went through and culled my sock drawer. Had 12 different patterns, now have 3. Big day
[+11] u/Dismal_Foundation784: Msft fuck u when you dump you never recover but when it comes to gaining your gains it never holds. Genuinely fuck u. The biggest pos stock ever fuck me for getting calls for microslop ts gonn go to zero
[+11] u/neverthy: Iran rejects ceacefire, lol can't trust a pathological liar eh
[+11] u/buttaviaper: never take profit, be a man and watch it evaporate
[+11] u/Psychological_Fly109: Concept of a cease fire: Oil -10%
No cease fire: Oil: +1%
[+11] u/Significant_Speed854: Iran fires missile at Israel,
Israel files missile at Iran,
US sends more troops and warships to Iran,
but we’re supposed to believe it’s nearing an end?
[+11] u/callsonreddit: Iran dismisses US ceasefire proposal: Pakistan officials
[https://thehill.com/policy/international/5799701-iran-dismissal-us-ceasefire-proposal-pakistan/](https://thehill.com/policy/international/5799701-iran-dismissal-us-ceasefire-proposal-pakistan/)
[+11] u/ConstantEfficiency83: *boots are on the ground*
🥭 truth - “the boots are Louis v and we’re only here for a fashion show”
SPY +3.6%
[+11] u/winston511: Buls used to celebrate premarket going from -1% to -0.7% and still have conviction. Now the buls panic when premarket goes from +0.7% to +0.65%. Fucking sheep
[+11] u/orsomeshitidk: Iran knows they just need to hold out a little longer for the Asian countries to start putting a lot of pressure on the west because things will go from expensive to really bad pretty quick.
It’s crazy to me how delusional perma bulls are.
[+11] u/PassiveF1st: Best way to play this nonsense is theta. We aren't going back on a bull run. You can't tell me peace talks are going well while simultaneously deploying 1000s of troops.
[+10] u/LiamPhlegmsworth: I’m not typically one to screech exit liquidity but… this recent pump was on a fake headline and didn’t even bother going down when it was confirmed fake. Sussy
[+10] u/Mikos_Enduro: We are so back!
(...to hot dogs in warm water for dinner)
[+10] u/BazInTheOrangeRanger: This shit grinds up, stalls out at 12 and dumps at 1:30
[+10] u/Sonyooo: Treasury: we're shorting oil
Half this sub: 🛢📞🤪
[+10] u/OkResponsibility2470: Come Friday someone is going to be wrong and I will be here to laugh at whoever that will be
[+10] u/AllianceOrTheHorde: It truly amazes me how much some people keep fucking up, yet they still keep climbing the ladder upwards. Like if i tried even 1% of the outrageous crap they all did, I'd be out of a job very quickly, but they keep falling upwards.
[+10] u/Nervous-Basis-1707: IRAN: “fool me twice, can’t get fooled again” when asked about peace talks. Big if true
[+10] u/suddenly-scrooge: Iran’s military said that it fired cruise missiles at Abraham Lincoln wtf, leave the man alone
[+10] u/LiamPhlegmsworth: What is even accomplished by pumping it AH then giving it all back by open? Like hardly any volume during that time I just don’t see the point. I guess so we don’t plummet into the abyss?
[+10] u/neo-futurism: Too much bullish in sub, puts it is.
[+10] u/rollinhating: Oil calls.. Strait still closed, no peace deal/ceasefire.. 🥭 lying to save his skin, but doesnt seem like Iran will let him..
[+9] u/hayleybts: Calls on fresh thread
[+9] u/Previous_Hope_2087: Calls at open seems ridiculous so it’s probably the move
[+9] u/CATLLM: 82nd dropping by Iran just to to smoke some hookahs and eat some kebabs. Very peaceful and chill.
[+9] u/Inevitable_Gainz: I am currently in negotiations with spx to get me back to breakeven today (I need a 2,800% gain). They’re currently holding the strait of $28,000 hostage but the U.S. Treasury is giving me a small loan of $200B to get it reopened.
WE WILL MAKE MY PORTFOLIO GREAT AGAIN -REGARD Inevitable_Gainz
[+9] u/MrYOLOMcSwagMeister: Green on what a bunch of proven liars say, this is so ridiculous 😂😂😂
[+9] u/kaapooj: this is the most annoying market. u can't go long as the current situation (let alone 2nd, 3rd order effects) are not priced in.
[+9] u/emperor_dinglenads: This shit is just damage control before all hell breaks loose. Ride the wave.
[+9] u/arbitraryBlue: Come on 🥭, tell another lie 📈📈📈
[+9] u/Sufficient-Aide6805: Draft all Twitch streamers and YouTubers.
[+9] u/Unique_Zucchini1041: This market is so fucked
[+9] u/xsystxsyst: 🚨 IRAN REJECTS CEASEFIRE, WON'T NEGOTIATE WITH PARTY THAT VIOLATED COVENANTS - FARS, CITING SOURCE
[+9] u/gnanwahs: *IRAN REJECTS CEASEFIRE, WON'T NEGOTIATE WITH PARTY THAT VIOLATED COVENANTS - FARS, CITING SOURCE
yea no shit
[+9] u/imakeitrayn: Bols trusted fucking Pakistan. PAKISTAN.
[+9] u/rrrenz: Why the fck do both sides love to talk during pre/post market hours?
[+9] u/General-Elk-6537: Knew this shit was too good to be true
[+9] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Basically had 13 hours thinking I was going to be rich and now 1 hour of knowing I’m going to be poor
[+9] u/Spencer1006: Can i ask a question here fellas
[+9] u/Bichael-Murry: PUTS
ON
THE
GROUND
[+9] u/orsomeshitidk: I’m not touching this today, I’ll let my boomer portfolio reap the benefits if this pump for real. I don’t trust it. But I will be monitoring the situation closely.
[+9] u/sauronII: it ties the room together.
[+8] u/Virtual_Secretary_98: Get out of the market before the weekend if you don't want to get cooked
[+8] u/Technicaltrades404: Pump enough fake news and people just start believing it all. Seriously getting those vibes here
[+8] u/Due-Information-6277: Let’s just price in victory today ok
[+8] u/Retaining-Wall: Stock go up,
And a stock go down,
Your port boutta take a trip,
Into pound town.
[+8] u/_Doomer_Wojack_: From now on I will get all my information from myself
[+8] u/soa333: SPY you will eventually hit 700. The world might not
[+8] u/ukweeve: I’m negotiating with myself pre market.
[+8] u/EnginrA: I got framemogged last night
[+8] u/Icy-Motor-8519: I don’t trust how green it is and I’m a bol. Held up by low volume and lies of “good productive talks.”
[+8] u/kim82352: > China warned Iran that the US is preparing a ground invasion, and Washington needs another round of negotiations to gather forces for a landing operation in the region.
[+8] u/el-art-seam: 15 pt plan doesn’t mention drones. Oops.
[+8] u/UnnecessaryPancake: This pump was promised to me 10,000 years ago
[+8] u/Kabrosif: 🥭 is publicly talking ceasefire and peace while simultaneously building up US ground forces in the region. This is 100% smoke and mirror psychological warfare. The Markets are buying it but that doesn’t mean anything when you peak behind the curtain/fog of War.
[+8] u/No_Skill8685: I am a young Korean man who was recently discharged from the military. And I got properly tied down by a vicious shit.
At a friend's recommendation, I invested my military salary in a single stock. It's a stock awaiting clinical trial results, and I was told it would be a huge hit...
Having invested a large sum of money without knowing anything, I was crushed by a bomb of a clinical trial failure and -80%.
I thought time would heal it, but I still haven't been able to escape.
That bastard's name is "atyr"... I was pinned down by it and am waiting for the rescue team again today...
[+8] u/NotMe357: "Fars News Agency, citing a source: Iran will not accept a ceasefire or enter into this process with a party that has violated its agreements."
[+8] u/HonestScar7176: Ain’t no peace talks, yall are dumb for believing that. And they also sent us a present???? wtf is this moron talking about.
[+8] u/Bong-Hits-For-Jesus: the u.s bombed iran twice in the past while in the middle of negotiations, but no im sure this time will be different. iran holds the cards at this point with the strait. they see the global impact and pressure it puts on the only thing trump cares about, the stock market. zero reason for them to fold to any type of demands. puts
EDIT:
here's irans response
[https://theindependent.com/partners/ap/video\_3929fd2c-29be-504d-9ebf-49c725c59718.html](https://theindependent.com/partners/ap/video_3929fd2c-29be-504d-9ebf-49c725c59718.html)
[+8] u/Iamhappilyconfused: For fuck's sake, they schedule the pump and dumps for pre market time today, we plebians will be eating theta for the rest of the day
[+8] u/chiswis: i just closed my MSFT position for $12 gain
[+8] u/Sensitive_Pilot3689: 0DTES ARE STORED IN THE BALLS 😤
[+8] u/rollinhating: Drill spy drill.. theres oil below 500. go give it freedom
[+8] u/the_mind_goblin1: This market feels even gayer than covid. At least it one in one direction (down). This is just fucking retarded
[+8] u/DuaLipa247: Breaking news 🥭 arrested for insider trading
[+8] u/alphaalpha06: for 5k you can be a 1% owner in LNKS ... you'll lose 5k but you'll be a 1% owner
[+8] u/ktzlolz: +3% day, market had enought of war news
[+8] u/TyroneSwoopes: 1 month chart on spy is pretty hilarious. You can see each time 🥭 tried to 🌮, the market realizing he can’t 🌮 this time, then another 🌮 when shit starts to crash again.
[+8] u/I-IV-I64-V-I: I wanted to watch the wolf of wallstreet for the first time (i know) and it's gotten stuck on the image of the bear in the first 30seconds.
is this an omen
[+8] u/ConstantEfficiency83: So nothing has changed in reality. We’re still bombing each other, but a half dozen “truths”, that were admitted market manipulation, have us trading at 660 instead of 600 today lol
[+7] u/sloanemonroe: I can’t with a good conscience not buy puts at open
[+7] u/tellit11: Supposed to go on a date with a girl this past Sunday night, go out Saturday night, meet another girl and chill with her at the bar with plans to see her Sunday afternoon. I live in a city with a population of 2 million plus and these two just happen to be friends. Like being up 20k at open and holding on for more, at zero I’m no hero.
[+7] u/vanceraa: i’m ready to get gaped
[+7] u/hayleybts: I'll close all my puts at loss today. Calls era begins
[+7] u/confused_teabagger: Claude, code me a feature-for-feature duplicate of a Bloomberg Console with market manipulation pre-detection, no bugs, make it voice-activated and it should play lofi beats if markets are flat, "I'm Coming Out" by Diana Ross if up more than 1% in a day and "It's Raining Men" by The Weather Girls at full volume if down more than 1% in a day. Make zero mistakes and limit token use to a max of $27.39 for this project. Thank you!
[+7] u/FartPolluter: USA gonna try increasingly zaney and madcap ways to negotiate with Iran. Like dressing up Steve Witkoff as Mojtaba Khamenei's tea lady only to reveal himself have way though his drinks order
[+7] u/fenton7: Pax Tangerina is upon us. Everyone wear orange today and enjoy the gains.
[+7] u/Marshmallowmind2: The bottom is in. Cramer told me
[+7] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: We are one tweet away
[+7] u/Upstairs_System_6257: How is us30 climbing when oil started going up again?
[+7] u/awetfartruinedmylife: October 2025 was the technological peak of our civilisation
[+7] u/Fun_Purpose6972: The daily thread from April 14th last year is really interesting. This was at the bottom, right after that infamous TACO, mind you. Yet the most liked comments were things like:
"Bulls are getting upvoted. Market crash incoming "
"The market simply cannot push new highs in an environment as unstable as this. All roads will eventually lead to a retesting of recent lows."
"SPY up over 1% on less than 300k volume, puts at open"
Anyway, calls. SP500 has never not gone up in the long term. TACO trade is KING
[https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/1jyv47g/daily\_discussion\_thread\_for\_april\_14\_2025/?sort=top](https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/1jyv47g/daily_discussion_thread_for_april_14_2025/?sort=top)
[+7] u/No_Fig_7835: I think at this points it’s clear we are going to go boots on the ground to secure the strait and it’s going to be a shit show. As long as Iran can make crossing the strait risky at all there is no reason for them to agree to any deal DJT is going to offer.
[+7] u/JernauG: No more gambling, im going to just buy quality stocks
[+7] u/Electronic-Advisor72: Gonna send a 15 point pay increase proposal to myself. Expecting good results on pay slip next week.
[+7] u/jackpearson2788: Recession risks rising/mortage demand dropping/inflation increasing…market lets go higher bc 🥭 said the war is won and definitely over
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: Beautiful salmon and pink colored sunrise here in Indian territory this morning. I hope everyone has a good day except the pedos in charge.
[+7] u/MissMatriarch: People here really thinking this market is holding up by itself.
B*tch, this thing is laying in the hospital, hooked up on life support.
[+7] u/Comfortable-Sky7801: I love how theres dozens of posts about how XYZ stock is down and the technical analysis behind it.
Hey retards there’s a war on, people took profit and are waiting until Trump says something stupid again before going back in.
I can’t stand these reactionary “analysis” posts that completely ignore the elephant in the room.
[+7] u/financiallythriving: Spilt stream to start the morning pissing on my leg
[+7] u/HonestScar7176: Iran rejects ceasefire
[+7] u/Iamhappilyconfused: All this pre market movement is such a scam
[+7] u/jda823: I can't wait for the 16 point plan to come out.
16. No rejecting this agreement.
[+7] u/EnginrA: Fellow broccoli cuts, assemble! 🥦🥦🥦🥦🥾🥾🥾🥾
[+7] u/orsomeshitidk: *god damn* I hate a slow fuckin gas pump bruh
[+7] u/tika_dengu: The country which gave shelter to Osama is now the darling of markets
[+7] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Fuk it I’m making an Iranian x account and posting some BS
[+7] u/DingleJingle_: All these big moves premarket just for it to sit flat all day really pisses me off.
[+7] u/Hardbun: I really fucking hate how it does this type of movement in the pre-market because it eliminates most opportunity for a swing option trade at open
[+7] u/kodaksdad2020: Peace talks going well
[+7] u/Erra0: Lol 2000 paratroopers being and to Iran and somehow oil is down and futures are green. The market is delusional.
We're absolutely going to be occupying Kharg island within the next couple weeks
[+7] u/Weak_Emu3659: Guys - Iran isn't even a real country, you can't trust headlines coming from some shadowy source over there. Look up videos of how people drive there. That's not how you drive in real countries.
[+7] u/pinghing: BREAKING: Puts are now classified as a federal crime. Treason charges pending for anyone holding $SPY below 600
[+7] u/mrbipty: saving all my pee in my balls for urea futures
[+7] u/Reply_Stunning: the bolfuk river flows so gently
[+7] u/Immediate-Coast-5066: bloomberg
headline "[Iran Rejects Ceasefire Proposal, Calls US Talks "Illogical"](https://www.bloomberg.com/news/live-blog/2026-03-25/iran-war-trump-latest-news-updates-live-oil-markets?srnd=homepage-americas)"
[+7] u/ComfortablePiglet842: Everyone that trades long enough says they made 600k the year prior but what they dont tell you is they lost 605k last year too. They lost 5k actually
[+7] u/neo-futurism: Its funny how regarded bols think 🥭 is playing 5D chess, when he can't even tie his shoelaces anymore.
[+7] u/Successful-End7689: Iran dropping the “no deal” right before open lmao… they learned from Donnie
[+7] u/cevapi_jelopy: This is the last enjoyable place on the internet, youtube IG and especially twitter are so insanely retarded and fukt now
[+7] u/twostroke1: Was wiping post shid but it was too wet from the bidet and my finger went through the toilet paper.
Immediately opened robinhood and started to press the buy puts button.
It all makes sense now.
[+7] u/OsamaBagHolding: "US waits for response to peace plan as Iran keeps up attacks."
Lol, lmao even
[+7] u/shryke12: God I love the smell of wsb in the morning.
[+6] u/Ok-Piano8789: gm, i think stocks go up today cuz more ships are going through the strait and iran acknowledges possible negotiations by asking for jd over shitkof. more importantly "stocks up on fake ceasefire" would make alot of ppl mad and the market loves making ppl mad.
[+6] u/Inevitable_Gainz: Sigh, buying puts to save the bulls yet again
[+6] u/DragonFruit-_-777: MU bag holders in shambles cause they actually thought the stock was not cyclical LOL
[+6] u/makhnosfork: Webull just approved me for futures trading. What could go wrong?
[+6] u/wattap: Bear cooter will be served today
[+6] u/Previous_Hope_2087: Puts on TSLA seems like a move. Probably a retarded one but it is a move
[+6] u/jonnyraza27: I swear to god MU better not play me today
[+6] u/Top-Meaning2626: I switched my Gemini voice to British Prostitute
[+6] u/Both-Improvement8645: Just wait until Friday near EOD to buy puts, easy money
[+6] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Remember that one time 🥭 caused the dip to 6550 and went long after posting absolute nonsense that caused the algos to tweak?
Yeah. Because he’d neverrrrrrrrrr do that.
[+6] u/edapalooza: Biggest pump and dump ready to happen
[+6] u/DrSeuss1020: Give me a 3 month Time Machine I know all the answers now
[+6] u/Able_Durian_1832: I say deal, you ignore it. I still say deal
[+6] u/jpk195: Silver lining in all this for Iran - they get to say about 🥭 what every world leader has been thinking.
[+6] u/GreenGameboyColor: Good morning, my handsome friends 🥱
[+6] u/joebeau99: Just remember to sell friday
[+6] u/ReferenceFunny7142: what the fuck was that ?
wait Im a minute early
[+6] u/brute-forced: Joe Kernen is a pure retard
[+6] u/natalie_merchant_fan: Iran's only leverage is keeping the Strait closed. So they can't give that up until there's an agreement they like.
[+6] u/JohanLiebert92: we're in such a retarded market that 🥭's truth social is the best indicator
[+6] u/Ready_Scratch_1902: troops on the ground
is hella bullish
[+6] u/ThetaFarmingRegard: double espresso and an upper deckie 6mg Zyn
time to get the colon traffic moving 💩
[+6] u/EnginrA: Poops on the ground
*what happens when I don’t make it to the toilet on time*
[+6] u/ExoticDaikon1872: are we pumping on vibes or any good news ?
[+6] u/One-Signature-2706: Let me explain to you why the market is going up and why it can’t go down now.
Because things can’t get worse than anticipated. It’s priced in. Things can only get better from here which isn’t priced in. So everyone who wanted to sell already sold. This is why every little piece of good news pumps the market.
You now have two choices: continue to follow the crowd and get rekt. Or buy before you lose another opportunity just like last year and then call the people who bought the dip “lucky” to cope
[+6] u/31andnotdone: you're telling me I buy a lyophilized powder in an unmarked vial from china, reconstitute it, inject myself with it and my skin will glow?
[+6] u/civillyRange: UPDATE News cycle:
Turkey sending back channel messages to Tehran to hammer out a peace deal
Pakistan sending back channel messages to Tehran to hammer out a peace deal
Iran's military rejected 15 point plan
Iran not confirming receipt of plan, dismissing diplomatic efforts
[+6] u/DragsterMC: I don’t know why the market just hasn’t learned to inverse 🥭yet like Cramer…
Like if he is saying there is a ceasefire, war is about to escalate big time
If he is saying he is about to nuke Iran, obvious ceasefire incoming
[+6] u/KahlVados: It's all priced in. Market bored with this war. Moving on.
[+6] u/The_BakedCrusader: Israel struck Tehran after Pakistan offered to host peace talks, but sure, the ceasefire will totally happen bro
[+6] u/Happy-Champion1661: the swings are crazy
[+6] u/TheDudeAbidesFarOut: This ain't holding. Not falling for it.
[+6] u/neo-futurism: Pakistan themselves are a terror nation, in perpetual war with India. And they are the ones negotiating "Peace". Make this make sense please.
[+6] u/Ok_Abbreviations8440: I’m not even going to pretend like I know what’s going to happen in the market today. This is like 2020 all over again
[+6] u/orsomeshitidk: Bulls, meet reality you fuckin dorks
[+6] u/Internal_Field5970: Can already tell just looking at premarket that today is gonna be retarded
[+6] u/highlanderquestion90: A hypothethical theory of a framework of a plan with frameworks, in theory
[+6] u/Sensitive_Pilot3689: Oil going parabolic because I need to fill my truck tomorrow 😥
[+6] u/the_mind_goblin1: trumps gonna be like "negotiations going better than expected" lmao
[+6] u/arbitraryBlue: *writing on the wall*
Some of y'all: 👨🏽🦯👨🏽🦯👨🏽🦯
[+6] u/AfraidAnalyst: IRGC - ceasefire? Uhh, no
[+6] u/Infamous-Mixture8278: Up .8% on rejection of a ceasefire holy fuck this market is ghey
[+6] u/Eddyrancid: I'm so curious about the dynamics that cause these massive AH swings, but it seems like I'd have to read stuff to understand them
[+6] u/Manufactured_feces: **Breaking News: Iran Is Gay; Buy Calls**
[+6] u/-TrueFacts-: bers in a cold sweat 😓😖
[+6] u/Healthy_Resort_363: ALL PROPAGANDA MACHINES AT 100% CAPACITY.
Calls on propaganda machines
[+6] u/glisteningoxygen: > southern Lebanese towns
You mean Northern Israeli towns?
[+5] u/Retaining-Wall: When the coffee and morning vape hits so hard, you can't even run to the washroom. Doin' the nip of life.
[+5] u/Manre831: Why tf am I up so early on my day off smh.
[+5] u/Typical-Layer-1253: Holy shit all time highs soon !!!
[+5] u/cannythecat: When will somebody post some actual DD, its just bol vs ber screeching here
[+5] u/iShitBloodandCumShit: Lord Vader is entering the battlefield. Nothing can stop the ber empire.
[+5] u/sweenygg: Black hole appearing for bers
[+5] u/_rockthemike: Puts at open, or wait until noon?
[+5] u/inconsistentsavant: Identity trading is destroying your ports
[+5] u/_rockthemike: Can’t wait for spaceX IPO so I can buy puts
[+5] u/looool_k_libtard: Can’t wait for everything to dump at 9:30:08 am
[+5] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Lost
/u/Rolling_in_the_Dip made a bet that SPY would go to 827.26125 within **2 days** when it was 661.809 and it did not, so they were banned for a week.
Their record is now 1 wins and 29 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+5] u/kaapooj: >Turkey is conducting intensive diplomatic efforts to try and prevent Gulf Arab countries from joining the US-Israeli war against Iran
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-03-25/turkey-is-urging-gulf-arab-states-not-to-join-war-against-iran
neutral for equities or oil
[+5] u/the_mind_goblin1: If no one has any idea why it's pumping and it seems completely ridiculous, it means it's a real pump
[+5] u/Wonderful-Form-6422: 🥭 wants high tech industry in US =>
High tech industry in democratic Asia =>
...
Hormuz gay =>
Democratic Asia can't oil
...
America Tech again =>
Ceasefire? Nuh uh.
[+5] u/AirwickS: What is your 15-point plan for today?
[+5] u/Ordinary-Ad2052: I hope you bers were leveraged
[+5] u/yaboisthename: Ok I really dont give a f no more im sick of hiding sick of being scared im just gonna say it.. im a little gay ninja jew boi
[+5] u/CallmeWooki: Can somebody say what the present was he got???
[+5] u/rollinhating: I need boots on the ground, and hormuz shut the fuck down, to save my oil calls…
[+5] u/dudeondacouch: Celieve it or not, balls.
[+5] u/karlelzz011: Isn't negotiating with myself
DELUSIONAL?
[+5] u/prezzie2728: I negotiated with myself about going to work this morning, work didn't know
[+5] u/neo-futurism: what we seeing is the "top", there are no negotiations, just smoke screen, which has been called by Iran.
[+5] u/These_Percentage75: Some of you are letting your biases get involved. You do understand it’s mid terms and 🥭 will pump markets
[+5] u/ultrachem: Do I buy oil on Friday?
[+5] u/Lanky-Ad-4579: Why do I have to go to work if regardless I’m just gonna sit on this sub all day. Can’t I just wfh
[+5] u/neo-futurism: Yeah, rug pull in daylight. Puts it is.
[+5] u/FLAKE_iN_MY_ASS: Markets are green, economy is weird, Fed is confused. Perfect time for a completely irrational YOLO.
[+5] u/aew2019: People who think the green today is legitimate are retarded and ghey. We’re going in the ground soon folks.
[+5] u/Emotional_Tie_7927: Breaking: 15 point plan revealed to actually be 🥭's McDonald's order
[+5] u/General-Elk-6537: So we looking at 650 open?
[+5] u/Iamhappilyconfused: Soo... are we doing the whole pump until ~1.25% then dump routine again?
[+5] u/the_mind_goblin1: This time it's different.
#I'm all in
[+5] u/Inevitable_Gainz: #**$662 is the 200 day dma. If we bounce off of that then you better be in puts**
[+5] u/Ok-Piano8789: >IRAN REJECTS CEASEFIRE, WON'T NEGOTIATE WITH PARTY THAT VIOLATED COVENANTS - FARS, CITING SOURCE
this isnt really news, they already said yesterday that they're not negotiating with witkoff and kushner again and they want jd
[+5] u/Roxorek: at some point this range will give up and we'll have a quick 10% flush
[+5] u/winston511: Iran - we will not accept a ceasefire. Also Iran - efforts have been stepped up to secure a ceasefire
[+5] u/ArbysRoastbeeff: At this point I’m ready to eat a cock
[+5] u/HumansHaveSoles: Why is oil pumping please I don't have a landline
[+5] u/Disconn3cted: There's a lot of posts here already. That usually means I'm about to lose all my money later
[+5] u/Graymyst: Man, the poors won't even be allowed to buy puts at open. Market is dead bois, every move in AH.
This is now daily theta gang territory.
[+5] u/knoqd_: > 🚨 *IRAN DOES NOT ACCEPT CEASEFIRE, SAYS US TALKS ILLOGICAL: FARS
> 🚨IRAN SAYS TRUCE, TALKS NOT VIABLE IN CURRENT CONDITIONS: FARS
[+5] u/neo-futurism: Each time taco manipulates, it loses it effectiveness. Like a virus.
[+5] u/Top_Cockroach313: Trump tweet incoming
[+5] u/Separate_Fold5168: What's next after 5 day pause?
90 day pause?
200% tarrifs?
Second breakfast?
[+5] u/GamblingMikkee: Fuck off Iran - enjoy getting blasted - just accept a peace deal
[+5] u/VisualMod: #Ban Bet Won
---
/u/jda823 made a bet that USO would go to 111.06 within **1 day** when it was 108.88 and it did, congrats regard.
Their record is now 4 wins and 0 losses
[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse)
[+5] u/orsomeshitidk: Nothing screams bullish to me like the market not doing jackshit for 6 months and then having a massive energy supply shock
[+5] u/k3t4mine: This is what happens when you send sociopathic lizard real estate moguls to sensitive diplomatic negotiations.
[+5] u/Worried_Quarter469: SPY taking heavy damage, someone didn’t pay the strait toll
[+5] u/FearlessStatement144: When did cnbc merge w fox?? wtf
[+5] u/Worth-Walk6265: They're cutting Michael Bay trailers instead of giving him a daily briefing. And you think there's a strategy here?
[+5] u/StopAndThinkPleaseTy: Doesn't Iran want like, military bases gone and the US to stop interfering with their proxy groups or something? Idk man...lol
[+5] u/whitehypeman: Can someone tell the market we already won?
[+5] u/slimeystevebob: Hope it holds so I can sell these calls at open... To buy more puts
[+5] u/The_Albertino: MSFT negative y/o/y is wild. The Open AI thing is crumbling fast.
[+5] u/apurimac777: https://www.axios.com/2026/03/25/trump-iran-oil-insider-trading
[+5] u/One-Signature-2706: Already reversing 😹😹😹😹😹😹 bers really thot 😹😹😹😹
The market will NEVER go down
[+5] u/LostandConfused2024: Who is buying puts at open
[+5] u/Visible_Sir7057: war is bullish , thats why we pumpin
[+5] u/Internal_Field5970: Sauron hasn’t sent any messages through the Palantir yet today?
[+5] u/neutralpoliticsbot: If your source for Iranian news is an “unnamed official from Pakistan”, you are reading propaganda not real news.
[+5] u/Appropriate_Ice_7507: Mu please go back up! I promise I’ll be a good boy and not jerkoff for an hour
[+5] u/buttaviaper: balls deep in gold because I feel it in my tummy.
[+5] u/Ill-Expression1737: great ill be down 2500 immediately at open i guess thanks alot 🥭
[+5] u/Unhappy-Ad-2609: 2025 ships transiting -> 60/day. Today 4/day. Keep buying calls 🤣
[+5] u/jda823: Concept of a ceasefire
[+5] u/Due-Dirt-8428: I’ll be at Wendy’s come around back and say waddup
[+5] u/Charming_Raccoon4361: good luck shorting PLTR
[+5] u/astromouse2024: Well apparently it was over within the first hour and yet here we are with spy sub 660 lol
[+5] u/Timely_Chicken_1564: Taiwan power plants. Coal 42.2%, Natural Gas 39.6%, Nuclear 6.3%., oil 1.3%. Regard.
[+22] u/gkdjsl: The whole ceasefire BS is for insider people to exit this market in an orderly fashion as you clap like a seal and get left behind holding the bag
[+20] u/Character_Pirate_152: War is over? *checks news* Nope, not a single thing has changed. Strait still closed. Market is retarded.
[+19] u/dooosayn: If you were ever needing more proof that the market is a complete scam here you go. Lmaaooo
[+18] u/Brawlerz16: Iran rejected ceasefire proposals and we pump?
I feel like I’m missing something here lol
[+17] u/UnintelligibleThing: Iran: We allow non-enemy ships to pass through the strait
BBC Headline: **Only one tanker identified passing Strait of Hormuz so far today**
[+17] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: these "peace talks" are just theater to control the markets before boots on the ground by sunday.
[+16] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: BREAKING: Despite never asking for it, many bols(including me) have died for Israel
[+16] u/noaholic: Always realize profit because the next bs is just around the corner
[+15] u/Standard-Top-5942: so we killed a bunch of people, further radicalized iran, increased inflation for the long term (because of the straight), and then given them 14 bill in tariff relieve? time to leave?
[+15] u/Options_tarded: Does no one remember that lutnicks son cashed out big on tariffs being shut down. You can’t trust this admin. It’s all manipulation for insider trading
[+15] u/drbigtoe: users should be banned for fake headlines
[+14] u/Crazy-Pickle-7412: Iran this Iran that... I ran out of money. Back to being a walmart greeter I go.
[+14] u/Boheed: lol insider trading so blatant even mainstream media is reporting on it like "well that was fucked up"
[+14] u/fknbtch: Not everything happening in the market is related to iran
[+14] u/ProblemOk4641: 🥭 trying to pump the market and Iran doing their best to tank the market. It’s beautiful.
[+14] u/sharpyz: The leader talks are nothing but artifical market pumps hate to break it to you .. the usa has no real rebel alliance in Iran.. . THEY do not want a isreal backed regime.. it's a fantasy
[+14] u/svpa3991: 🥭 really being out taco’d 💀
[+14] u/PocaMadre69: This is crazy going up for no reason
[+13] u/MichaelJamesBurry: DO NOT BUY THE DIP I REPEAT DO NOT BUY THE DIP YOU WILL BECOME EXIT LIQUIDITY
[+13] u/gkdjsl: US / Israel are striking near the Bushehr nuclear plant, Iran is hitting near the Dimona one
Bulls: PEACE DEAL, THIS IS A GREAT TIME TO BUY CALLS
[+13] u/2QuarterDollar: What a soap opera drama. Keeping Up With The White House. On this episode Donnie has a secret lunch with.. himself! While Jared and Witkoff created a devious scheme and kept Vance and Rubio out. But Rubio just found out and told Vance all about it who is ofcourse.... not happy! stay tuned
[+13] u/Maximum-Counter-4904: it’s a 3 fent patch kind of day
[+13] u/SquidKid47: > Stocks jump amid reports US sent ceasefire plan to Iran
Wait so we're not negotiating at all? We just sent them the plan and that's enough for a 1% pump????
[+13] u/DISAPPOINTING_FAIRY: BREAKING: IF YOU POST THINGS THAT LOOK LIKE HEADLINES WITHOUT AN ATTACHED SOURCE, YOU ARE A PIECE OF SHIT
[+12] u/OrdinaryMix4013: #iran dealing with a terrorist lmaooo
[+12] u/Apfelmoes_: Nice little pump fake before the crash at open
[+12] u/ToroLoco_TL: IRANIAN SOURCES SAY THEY WANT A FULL END TO THE WAR, NOT JUST A CEASEFIRE: FARS
[+12] u/No_Clue_3225: US 'negotiating with itself" bullish
[+12] u/RomanJohnWick: How many times will we hear "war over, Iran agrees to terms", only for more bombs to drop
[+11] u/SouthNice7324: Guys I have found this great penny stock, it moves up and down crazy like in seconds. It’s called SPY. They manufacture espionage stuff I think
[+11] u/solidsneeze: one thing I can guarantee today: you will get fucked on a fake headline
[+11] u/gkdjsl: In other news, both Microsoft and Disney are backing out of their deals with OpenAI
good job AMD, you really did partner up with the absolute shittiest player in the AI space
[+11] u/AgeMiddle854: Trying to quit smoking during this time in history has proven very difficult.
[+11] u/hioman01: Computers no longer need memory and storage now
[+11] u/HomeMadeToast: If 🥭 sends Barron to war we are officially living in the Arrested Development timeline 🤣
[+11] u/Scalpaholic: Seriously, what's the "present" 🥭 was talking about yesterday? Was he just trying to manifest Iran accepting a rebranded JCPOA before sending it to their Spam folder?
[+11] u/Haunting-Window-5125: Wait am I missing some crazy good Iran news?? It seems we are sending more troops and Iran has said they arent negotiating?
[+11] u/Antique-Flight-5358: So Iran says no ceasefire...we still mooning...wtf
[+11] u/Put_Er_There_Sport: Algos are the shittiest thing to happen to the stock market
[+11] u/Val44x: BERS REALLY BELIEVE IRAN MEDIA LMAO
[+10] u/cryptohorn: When you trust Iran over witkoff and kushner
[+10] u/Muted-South4737: Market at all time highs, consumer prices lowering every day, and best of all, we finally got all of the Epstein Files, unredacted and neatly organized for easy search.
[+10] u/1Oc2s52a12864s3sfa: I used to think I was good looking or maybe in denial that I was aging into my 40s. Today, I saw a side glimpse photo of myself from a doordash delivery picture of my food, and I realized I was the arrogant 0DTE trader, but in terms of how I perceived myself in physical beauty. I saw the acne scars on my skin, along with the fine lines that showed up clearly in outdoor lighting. Because I never went outside, I never realized how much I aged. Ouch, it fucking stings.
[+10] u/BackgroundOstrich488: We're living in La La Land of truth social posts with insider trading cashing in on people's fantasies.
[+10] u/thai_sticky: So China gets Taiwan and their semis, and we get Cuba and their... rum?
[+10] u/OrdinaryMix4013: BREAKING: US SOURCES SAY THEY AGREE TO THE TERMS OF LOSSING THE WAR, NOT JUST TO CEASEFIRE: CNBC
[+10] u/RomanJohnWick: Bull bots in full force today
[+10] u/svpa3991: Incredible, my puts are deeply fuk 😎
[+10] u/amanj41: Didnt Iran say they rejected the proposal?
[+10] u/brannock_: "We're totally doing a ceasefire"
Market rips 10%
"Iran categorically rejects a ceasefire"
No reaction from market
You will believe the absolute most bullshit lies possible because you are mental slaves
[+10] u/DanasSideWife: Dear Ayatollah, I wrote you but you still ain't calling
I left my Truth Social, my iPhone, and the Red Phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got 'em
There probably was a problem with the Sanctions I started or something
Sometimes I tweet the threats too sloppy when I jot 'em
But anyways; forget it, what's been up? Man, how's your faction?
My polls are looking tremendous, too, I'm bout to win the election
If I make a Deal, guess what I'mma call it?
I'mma name it The Island
I read about your Dad the Ayatollah, too, I'm sorry
I had a General take a ride over some sand that didn't want him
I know you probably hate this every day, but I'm your biggest man
I even got the uranium shit that you hid in the dam
I got a tower full of gold and your pictures, man
I like the shit you did with Hamas, too, that shit was bad
Anyways, I hope you get this, man, tweet me back
Just to deal, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Don
[+9] u/MasterElite1: >u/MasterElite1 9 points 15 hours ago
>Iran will reject ceasefire and then US will use it as grounds to invade
✅️ IRAN DOES NOT ACCEPT CEASEFIRE, SAYS US TALKS ILLOGICAL: FARS
And another one.
[+9] u/TomatoSpecialist6879: My calls are ready to die for Israel
[+9] u/Independent_Term5790: This seems like a golden opportunity to finally jump ship and sell everything
[+9] u/kev0795: Another day of fake news
[+9] u/sharpyz: Imo someone in iran is double playing the united states and had to show donny oil leverage but its really just a irgc spy 🕵️♂️ robbing us blind
[+9] u/Walking72: *White House scrambles to downplay shockingly well-timed bets*
Move along. Nothing to see here.
[+9] u/Coley44: Market beginning to realise 🥭 has absolutely no capacity to solve this issue. The dump from Thursday onwards will be incredible. The collapse after he confirms boots on ground for war even worse
[+9] u/Humble_Explanation32: "Iran will not accept a cease-fire offer from the United States, Iranian state media reported"
just before market open
[+9] u/dorkstar1: Donnie Donnie
Yes papa
Iran war over
Yes Papa
Telling lies
No Papa
Iran 💦
[+9] u/Popoice: most obvious bull trap ever
[+9] u/cbusoh66: Tell me lies
Tell me sweet little lies
[+9] u/whatsgoingonhonestly: Same shit we fall at open to 0.0% day
[+9] u/ILikeCorgiButt: Gambling mode on. Buying puts at open
[+9] u/SadDevelopment3049: We’ve won the war — but the bombs will continue because we can’t stop winning! Thank you for your attention to this matter!
[+9] u/SquirtleStomp: 82nd airborne and marines are set to arrive in theater friday lol. Luckily after market close, praise the dow
[+9] u/Ready-Tennis8577: Don’t even feel like trading rn
I want orange juice
[+9] u/Important_Yoghurt722: This shit is so rigged it's not even funny anymore lol
[+9] u/johns2289: I absolutely, unequivocally understand none of this.
[+9] u/Time-Cardiologist906: lol the way the stock market pumps based off that nonsense peace plan is hilarious. It’s a complete nothing burger.
[+9] u/GoZukkYourself: Call an ambulance, but not for bol.
[+9] u/lobsterspider: I am a bull
But I can’t get excited by this
The rug will pull
[+9] u/poozyfloor: Iraq oil output down 80 percent. Oil falls.
[+8] u/ybnesman3223: He is standing in a house fire with his hair on fire and his suit catching telling us the fire is good fam
[+8] u/chuastan: Are y guys telling me the POTUS, the most powerful and best economy of the world. Is choosing to compound a lie with more egregious lies. If so advised. It not even about this war. I declare the US market uninvestable
[+8] u/SuperNewk: Iran turned into trolls, I want to know what the gift was. Probably an AI pic of Trump doing stuff.
[+8] u/teh_herper: #Perfectly engineered theta days before 500% volume at 3:59 PM on Friday
[+8] u/Ok-Prior-9953: “We wanted to make a deal we wanted them to hand us their country and make me leader but they very stupidly said no. So now we will bomb them”
[+8] u/Immediate_Employ_355: triple fenty patch might not be enough for today fellas
[+8] u/Mr_ThrowAwayJohnson: Puts for “Cease Fire talks not going well”
[+8] u/S-Club-Party: If a TV cop show goes on long enough, 100% of the characters will have their families get abducted by a serial killer.
[+8] u/rioferdy838: Of course MU dumps after I buy.
It’s my special power. Hedge funds should pay me.
[+8] u/PuzzledLeader8941: Pissed the bed last night
[+8] u/LasyKuuga: Pretty sure a client left because of me. My boss asked the client why they left. They just gave a bs answer
Thank fuck you a real one ☝️ 🙏
[+8] u/Apfelmoes_: I couldn't imagine what it's like to live in a warzone until I invested in Webull. Seeing the total destruction every day, to live inside of it, it's overwhelming. You simply cannot fathom the despair it until you live it for yourself.
[+8] u/PM_me_a_nip: I’ve never been so ashamed of my country as I am right now.
We didn’t plan a single thing and we have both blown our fingers off and now we are trying to suck balls to get out of it.
“Sad”
[+8] u/HolographicHeart: Man is he going to feel stupid when he declares the war over and everyone starts talking about Jeffrey again
[+8] u/lysergalien: My prediction: SPY rips up to 664, everyone thinks it's over and buys back in/loads calls, then it rejects hard back to 650
[+8] u/DISAPPOINTING_FAIRY: I like using a different app to watch charts than the one I use to trade, so that way I can just be like "oh yep that sure is the wrong direction" without having to actually look at the big red number on my position
[+8] u/HeavyArmsJin: Lol of course Ondas lost all 5% gain immediately when market open
[+8] u/Sidney_Godsby: Because, once again, 🥭lied
[+7] u/TokiAsuma: So we pump when the ceasefire was announced, Iran then rejected the ceasefire and we don’t dump?
[+7] u/Commercial-District1: If MSFT doesn’t go up, I’m gonna co-pilot myself right off a cliff
[+7] u/sharpyz: A market with no jobs this green = shit show coming
[+7] u/cbusoh66: The amount of people who don't use proper grammar is too damn high
[+7] u/MasterElite1: >We are headed for a full-blown financial crisis. February import prices spiked 1.3% while export prices surged 1.5%, annualizing to inflation rates of 16.8%–19.6%. That's before oil rose 50%.
Fed knew inflation was blowing out. +50% oil came. It held anyways instead of hiking.
This is called **financial repression**.
[+7] u/__nameless____: Hey 🥭, where's the concept of a plan for the deal?
[+7] u/miata_only: I took a wild, completely uneducated guess on what would happen and it didn't pan out. Therefore there's probably lots of manipulation going on, you guys.
[+7] u/shortitforever: Why are they allowing us an opportunity to buy puts?
[+7] u/WombatShwambat: Who do I call for a refund
[+7] u/ProblemOk4641: Pump to 662 followed by a dump!!
[+7] u/spsteve: So I guess no one is worried about this:
Import Prices 1.3% MoM, Exp. 0.6%
Import Prices 1.3% MoM, Exp. 0.4%
[+7] u/InIce1234: Another McDonalds paycheck gone for Bear.
[+7] u/Low_Programmer1814: Who else is itching to lose money in this confused market?
[+7] u/Bam2458: The other night my boomer pensioner father-in-law was drunk and confidently proclaiming the s&p can’t possibly continue to have 10% annual returns over the next 20-30 years.
Calls.
[+7] u/Salty-Bar-1975: City Wok in City pat town
[+7] u/LiveMotivation: Iran to 🥭 : I’m the Captain now of market manipulation
[+7] u/Mother_Big9112: So who trusts this pump enough to all in
[+7] u/SouthNice7324: Mag 7 pumping 2%. Microsoft - best I can do it 0.83%
[+7] u/grimandnordic1: Looks like SPY $700's back on the menu boys *entrails flying all over*
[+7] u/MaleficentEgg1440: When in doubt oil it out
[+7] u/SergeantThreat: Terrible sales numbers: bullish for TSLA
Oil shock affects gas prices: Bullish for TSLA
Potential peace plan to eliminate oil shock: Also bullish for TSLA
[+7] u/Scarfaceb1tch: Pull the plug and start the drain
[+7] u/saw-it: Guys they’re just sending thousands more troops for the ceasefire celebration right?
[+6] u/RFKsBrainwormm: Uh oh 🥭’s running out of plays
[+6] u/hamborgard: The put is coming from inside the house
[+6] u/ih8myylife: They couldn't have waited till market open so we could buy puts??
[+6] u/OxCart69: So wait … wait market doesn’t care about ceasefire rejection … what it cares about is tangible escalation?
[+6] u/MyCactusTeacher: i am honestly so angry that retards got tricked again
even when you are right, retards make you wrong
[+6] u/teh_herper: #Where was the pump that was promised 3000 minutes ago
[+6] u/Holeph: love just sitting in cash during this
[+6] u/SouthNice7324: I am beginning to doubt the art of this deal
[+6] u/kev0795: 🚨 IRANIAN SOURCES SAY THEY WANT A FULL END TO THE WAR, NOT JUST A CEASEFIRE - FARS
Lmaooooo Media is playing us.
[+6] u/HeavyArmsJin: Looking for a good timing to jump back into oil
[+6] u/Trashpanda7193: Feting raped by MU who would have though
[+6] u/longGERN: Apps that change their perfectly good UI into some bubbly cartoon bullshit because the boardroom of sweaty IT nerds had to use their budget or whatever can actually go fuck themselves
[+6] u/Three_of_a_kind3515: So.. am wondering what the 15 items of negotiations said?
Surrender! Or I’ll shoot!
Like 15 times in a row.. but the letters become more bolder as they move down the list?
Hmm..🤔
[+6] u/Mean-Evidence-4056: Fidelity says my port is down $18k where'd it go
[+6] u/ajr901: This shit is a bull trap if I’ve ever seen one. This guy says “we have a great deal in the works, they’re going to give us so much” and the other side says “we aren’t negotiating and he’s negotiating against himself” but the market has a $7 swing. Okay.
[+6] u/trsx5: Sure, ill get burned by theta again today. Why not
[+6] u/MyCactusTeacher: mango should host a reality show where he picks different levers to cause hyperinflation
oh wait..
[+6] u/AbrocomaNegative825: #HELLO
> yes its true. Im negotiating with wallstreetbets, its a big talk we are having yes very big.
> Weve come to an agreement to let images back into the daily thread for 5 👋 whole days
> Becouse you know, we gotta let the images in and, they do to! We took our yolo and they got, well, you know what they got. Everyone knows 🤌
> So yeah, big deals are coming. Lots of discussions with wallstreetbets. Lots of good conversations and frankly, well, frankly im not tired of winning!
[+6] u/Mysterious-Ad-22: I'm gonna sell all my micron leaps and buy ODTE spy calls today I think
[+6] u/zainwhb: The MOMENT someone here posts that they will buy calls on MU earnings, everything goes to shit. No FUCK YOU GUYS
[+6] u/Trader0721: This move seems to be crude related more than anything else…thoughts are that vessels will move…the problem with that is if the war doesn’t stop, at some point Iran realizes that the only way they can win is by holding the world hostage…
[+6] u/Commercial-District1: If I have both calls and puts, I can make tons of money off volatility…. If I time it right… which I won’t
[+6] u/dontlikeyacutG: My 640 puts for Friday don’t feel very good, what’s the return policy?
[+6] u/---Right--Tackle---: Casino took all my coins
[+6] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: Ive never seen so many doomers in one spot as this daily thread. Murica wins again. Stonks only go up.
[+6] u/AMX_revue: Mass extinction event for SNDK MU regard bols
[+6] u/ecoburner87: my take: institutional liquidity pulled out and front-ran the war in January and February, pulled out of metals, pulled out of tech - the charts speak for themselves - maybe some of them front ran the oil spike, but they're out of that now
that liquidity sat on the sidelines or in bonds for most of this month. bonds have sold off, yields rising, that liquidity is percolating, they are salivating for a 1-3 week pump to draw more retail in before it goes mega-short
retail can't believe why the market might be pumping right now, and oil isn't. they know something we don't know and we might see a relief rally. retail may be skeptical for a few days but will jump in by week 2. a little after that is when we crash.
[+6] u/iFiredIce: Holy shit HOOD just popped a blue chew
[+6] u/No-Put2311: Circuit breaker on MU?
[+6] u/SouthNice7324: I’m not falling for it… yet
[+6] u/Miker1730: microslop red in a minute here
[+6] u/hermeskino715: You can't tell me the markets aren't pumping off pure hopium
[+6] u/SergeantThreat: I really need to try the 🥭 method at my job. Break something that was working, fix it a little worse than it was, ask for promotion.
[+6] u/flashbangkill: can we get that Persian rug now?
[+6] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: Iran problem solved. Now we get to listen to bears tell us how Cuba is going to destroy the American economy.
[+6] u/Sledgahammer: I trust this pump as much as I trust the 1m SPY graph...
Buying puts
[+6] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: CASINO RULE NUMBER 1: no crying in the casino.
[+6] u/burtburtburtcg: Exit liquidity secured
[+6] u/Onurb86: Ridiculous pump, SPY should be close to 600
[+6] u/PocaMadre69: Iran trade has ruined me financially
Rallies make no sense, spurred on by lies and bullshit
[+6] u/Euphoric_Present8838: Call me a regard but I think we are about to dump
[+6] u/ThoseGelInsertThings: I upvoted every bearish comment last night just to give bears false hope.
Oil dumping mid-evening was the sign for today.
[+6] u/Commercial-District1: Cramer just said 0dte is like putting a gun to your head. Do with that what you will
[+6] u/According-Page8618: remove msft from the market
[+6] u/tsunamiwaves_: Microsoft wants to go red lol
[+6] u/Venom17645: market choose to pump but wont dump until baron confirmed his puts
[+6] u/HDauthentic: That could still hit, don’t be so sure
[+6] u/Professional-Bag155: !banbet MSFT 440 35d
[+6] u/Ready-Tennis8577: So you don’t lose your money like a retard
[+5] u/S-Club-Party: Making fun of bears is getting stale, they have no sense of joy and can’t take a joke. Instead, I’m gonna start shit talking bulls who *aren’t bullish enough*
[+5] u/Swiftnice: Buy it right now lol it's gonna fly when ground troops land
[+5] u/WocketWaccoon: SOFI is straight dogshit
[+5] u/Crazy-Pickle-7412: Gey bers out in full force this morning with the fud
[+5] u/Aware-Teacher5389: I lmao everytime at this infomercial on CNBC where dude is saying he has got a lot going on and he doesn’t need the attention. Then proceeds to pitch his fin model.
[+5] u/According-Page8618: we are 1 good iranian news away from a +3% day
[+5] u/Jealous_Bend8944: Bulls , isnt your 4ss sore already ? My 🐻🍆 still got more rounds in it , im waiting you 🌚
[+5] u/UnintelligibleThing: Market already seems exhausted pre-market lol.
[+5] u/Shot-Acanthaceae1420: Red by open, thank me later.
[+5] u/SmoothOperator423: Red by lunch (if I don’t eat lunch it won’t go red)
[+5] u/Open_Waltz6902: Going to rub one out before market opens, my current output is what many would consider "rookie numbers."
[+5] u/sushilee123: I don’t even know what to believe anymore in the news.
[+5] u/Medical-Tune676: I have half a thought that there are negotiations happening because both sides will often issue misleading reports as part of the negotiation process. It looks fucked until boom they announce a deal. Saying this as a bear.
[+5] u/peanuts-in-my-jelly: I AM IN TALKS WITH THE BEARRORISTS AND THEY SAY THEY WANT A DEAL🫴
[+5] u/Kind_Initiative_7567: Lol this wants to dump so bad 😂 and it figures, cuz I broke my rule and bought calls yesterday
[+5] u/After_Stop_7252: Welp meta was found liable for child sexual exploitation .. it's gonna be a fantastic daaaaaaaay....
[+5] u/good-times-: Nothing is certain in war except confusion
[+5] u/ideletedmyaccount04: Worthless 0TDE puts for as far as the eye can see.
[+5] u/MasterElite1: >When a country resorts to import tariffs specifically to service sovereign debt, this reflects a failure of broader revenue mechanisms. The country is already in or near fiscal breakdown, and the currency is likely to collapse within a short window.
✅️ February import prices spiked 1.3% while export prices surged 1.5%, annualizing to inflation rates of 16.8%–19.6%.
[+5] u/DrummerCompetitive20: MU getting rekt for no reason
[+5] u/swflcape: It’s like March Madness with cats for balls.
[+5] u/4TheGhostCat: Fun Fact: Stocks only go up.
[+5] u/Contango_withme: I’m still not bullish at all…
Great dip buying opportunity, that’s it.
[+5] u/version-two: USO short interest getting wild. Guess that’s one way to control price.
[+5] u/WrexyWrex: I've taken the dog out
I've made my coffee
I've drank half my coffee
I've taken the poop
I've taken the shower
I've put the deodorant on
Let's go
[+5] u/MasterElite1: Gold and oil will soon go up together
[+5] u/palmanul: Waiting for 🌮 right before his five-day moratorium expires
[+5] u/BrotherDefiant: The best due diligence is this sub and Yahoo Finance right?
[+5] u/BlitzComet95: SNDK or MU calls at open?
[+5] u/Muted-South4737: My brokerage gave me a present yesterday, a very good, expensive present.
Expensive for me.
[+5] u/Holeph: spy 662 will be touched today but where it goes after that will be muy interesante
[+5] u/ToroLoco_TL: 'Cuba Next!': 1000s Rally In Favor Of American Intervention In Communist Island Nation
💀💀💀
[+5] u/Klaus_Winchester: Is it going up today or down
[+5] u/Pitiful_Bedroom_6619: CASINO RULE NUMBER 2: no logic applied.
[+5] u/Available_Road_2538: Breaking news: Taiwan launches naval invasion of Iran
[+5] u/cloudnine538: “Ceasefire” is the new “jk lol”
[+5] u/Reasonable_Roger: I'm gonna fuck shit up today and lose a bunch of money. You know why? I'm fucking regarded that's why.
[+5] u/davidbigham: "War talk 99.5% done." pump it 😂
[+5] u/Paincoast89: Premarket gave me hope and then took it away
[+5] u/McTurtleAteMyCalls: Iran: friendly ships may pass. Later today: friendly ship blown up. Puts.
[+5] u/Clappindemcheekies: Pinned at +5 for 12 hours. Gtfo of here.
[+5] u/Independent-Visit139: sorry yall MU gotta keep sinking so I can buy more calls
[+5] u/Optionmonger: The truth is nobody knows which way this thing goes but thank you for your utter certainty. That's the real beauty of this market.
[+5] u/MichaelJamesBurry: LMAO retail become exit liquidity for memory stocks.
[+5] u/Pale-Silver-8178: Look how they massacred my boy SNDK , MU
[+5] u/boycottredditmgmt: Oil hitting 95$ again by April 3rd . How do u do ban bet?
[+5] u/Commercial-District1: I haven’t had a cavity in 10 years, until yesterday. Gotta get it filled today 😭
[+5] u/4TheGhostCat: I've taken shits longer than that bear market.
[+5] u/Czyzzle: Imma bouta paperhand the fuk outta these calls
[+5] u/Unemployable1593: heading out for milk and smokes
brb
[+5] u/MyCactusTeacher: time to face the music of your options being worthless
[+5] u/ThatGuyDan123: Micron university on life support
[+5] u/Cold_Hyena_6251: 666 by 11 watch this shit
[+5] u/Phandomtrigger: Sold my calls already, pumps galore now
[+5] u/Available_Road_2538: Machine god 🙌 has been unschackled
Market pumps on insider trading of imminent machine god
[+5] u/Shiccup1: One of you is holding my MU bags from the top
[+5] u/burtburtburtcg: Bol really bought at 660 this morning.
[+5] u/ItsyBitsySPYderman: Bears aint figured out the internet is selling you doom for screen time and clicks. They be buying the doomer narrative. It's all over, america had a good run, mango is a disaster, economy in shambles, market gonna crash, great depression coming, ww3 coming, etc.
Just buy calls on the dips, stonks go up. Never bet against Murica!
[+5] u/Jagged_Tide: AMZN and HOOD holy shit
[+5] u/thegreatgumbini: Based on the market I guess we now have peace in the middle east! Huzzah!
[+5] u/Aggravating_Fig6288: I guess a mere $100 gain is considered too greedy now? Now my calls are on fire ffs
[+5] u/Mighty-HeaIthy: Any news? Or did memory stocks just collectively shit their pants for no reason. SNDK dropped $25 out of nowhere.
[+5] u/Afraid_Contest_6769: Let me know when you found out, it has something to do with SK Hynix in Korea and then possibly going to American exchanges. There may be more but the weakness in MU and Sandisk despite insane earnings report performance is unfortunate. This will pass
[+5] u/Les7X: You know, it might be a good time to take profits after a shrek gangbang that lasted more than 6 months
[+5] u/Three_of_a_kind3515: SMCI calls baby! All the bad people left at their own accord. 😏
[+5] u/borrokalaria: I'm tired of all this winning, boss! Now that we have managed to replace Khamenei with Khamenei, can we go back to the AI bubble thing?
[+5] u/Fit_Attitude_2781: A fiery but mostly peaceful ceasefire
[+5] u/SoloOutdoor: Send in the broccoli cuts
[+5] u/OxCart69: I know what the special gift was that Iran promised to the US.
“Energy related”
It’s enriched uranium
[+5] u/frogboyjr: guys I think my portfolio is making lower highs and lower lows
[+5] u/himaalayan: MU should go down by 60%. Inference costs down by 6x after new google algorithm
[+5] u/lysergalien: Unless 🥭 tweets it will reject the 200dma. Even if it pumps and spends a couple of days of riding just above it, it will eventually break back down. This market was going to dump well before the Iran situation and I believe we won't resume bull market until tapping the 1 year average.
Source: my ass, lines, vibes, and screenmaxxing
[+5] u/mannycalls24: Yeah this isn’t gonna hold puts at open 🐻
[+5] u/Voenker: # US ramps up supplies with defence companies in ‘wartime footing’ shift
But ceasefire is in the making guys. /s
[+5] u/burtburtburtcg: Bol so fucking stoopid they can’t see 3 minutes into the future.
[+5] u/TimeTravelingChris: Not even 50%.
🥭 Got 77 million votes out of a total US population of about 350 million people. So of ALL the people living in the US (regardless of voting eligibility), only 22% voted for this idiot.
[+25] u/fateoftheg0dz: https://preview.redd.it/99m9m7ye47rg1.jpeg?width=1206&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1ee5d0ef076b04e2073f7b91cc05c45afc616cd4
Trump has started negotiations with Iran!!
[+18] u/EducationalCicada: I simply can’t accept that Mango and his buddies will face zero comeuppance for their infinite money glitch insider trading.
The Universe can’t be that unjust. It simply can’t.
[+17] u/addicci: We already won but we need help from Nato but the war is over and they want a deal but we will keep bombing if they dont open the strait but the war is already over and the strait is open
[+17] u/EndGenocide13: WE ARE SENDING THOUSANDS OF TROOPS, BUT DON'T WORRY, THE WAR IS OVER ALREADY I SWEAR
[+15] u/GittingerFredl: WRITING A MESSAGE IN ALL CAPS MAKES IT TRUE.
I HAVE A BIG PEEPEE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!
[+15] u/SaaSGrass: WHY MARKET NOT GO DOWN LIKE BER HELLSCAPE PREDICTION
????
[+14] u/moorhound: For anyone thinking the US - and especially Israel - are going to accept these terms, you're smoking crack.
We're getting boots on the ground this weekend
[+13] u/Napster-mp3: 🥭 is a GENIUS!! The guy ending wars every weeek!
[+13] u/d33p7r0ubl3: Iran saying Trump can't taco his way out of this one and market reacts positively
[+13] u/Unhappy_Hedgehog_808: Such an incredible “gift” he couldn’t even say what it was.
[+12] u/Equivalent-Net-1557: Iran’s not backing down. We’re gonna drop
[+12] u/cow_grass: This market is stressful. It could go in any direction at any point
[+12] u/Kind-Worldliness4634: Unconfirmed reports are saying 🥭 has declined the negotiation offer with himself.
[+11] u/Soffatjockis: Iran says fuck your calls.
They got mango by the balls.
[+11] u/PeachScary413: So... whenever the stonk market starts to drop Mango will just make some shit up and the algos will pump it back right? When CPI comes in at 8% he's just gonna say "Nuh-uh that's fake news" and we pump anyway? Is there any scenario where the market could conceivably crash again or is this just the Mango free money cheat code now?
[+11] u/Ihateporn2020: Iran's response makes sense. This is existential for them.
[+11] u/Bpallstar95: This wants to crash so badly but every little dip is getting bought lmao.
[+11] u/Nick_Gilberts_Bowtie: Israel bombing Tehran today but yeah peace talks baby!
[+11] u/EmbarrassedKoala3982: IRAN I DONT MIND IF YOU DAMAGE MY PORTFOLIO, JUST DONT LET HIM TACO OUT OF THIS
[+11] u/Frumpy_little_noodle: Recession Harbinger reared its ugly head today:
New Waffle House worker is a total smoke show. We're cooked.
[+11] u/CulturalConclusion76: 🥭 claiming Iran negotiated a great deal
turns out it was expired Subway coupons and a Starbucks gift card with $3.76 still on it. truly a master of his craft
[+10] u/br0botic: Did the market just now realize Iran said no?
[+10] u/Namtabmal: I dont understand how anyone can trade currently in this moment when one tweet can cause huge correction either way. Its way too nerve racking
[+10] u/cheetles_plus: This market is entirely tweet based
🥭 8AM: we have a plan! 📈
Iran 10 AM: there’s no plan idiots. 📉
[+10] u/SnooShortcuts7911: We are headed for a full-blown financial crisis. February import prices spiked 1.3% while export prices surged 1.5%, annualizing to inflation rates of 16.8%–19.6%. That's before oil rose 50%. Unless the Fed raises rates several hundred basis points now, inflation will skyrocket.
[+10] u/popsferragamo: If we filtered out all replies with "bol" "ber" "anoos" "shrek" there would be 10 comments per day
If you have nothing interesting to say, don't reply, you tards
[+10] u/StraitOfHummus: Somewhere in the ranks of the US military are troops figuring out how to open up brokerage accounts with margin right before deployment
[+10] u/Old-Collection-224: THE BEARS MAKE SENSE, AND THE BULLS MAKE MONEY.
[+10] u/xironically23: Love how the market completely accepts the president lying to pump the market
[+10] u/VellyJanta: Yall forgetting Israel WANTS the war to continue
[+10] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: # what in the actual literal fucking fuck is going on
[+10] u/Soffatjockis: 100% we gonna get an invasion of some kind on Friday after close.
8000 marines + 3000 paratroopers inbound. 200 billion dollars extra for Pentagon.
"But taco! But peace! But hormuz open!"
Cope. Yall fucked if you don't sell before Friday.
[+10] u/G0RD0N_CLARK: It's 2026 and dropping troops on a country out of an airplane is still a method of attack? Might as well line up shoulder to shoulder again and march like the bloody British.
[+10] u/ADynes: In mangos defense he really might think he's negotiating with them in that failing brain of his.
[+9] u/shindiggaa: BREAKING: $AMD HAS SECURED PEACE WITH IRAN
[+9] u/honestabesss: SPY Paratroopers deployed
[+9] u/MarbledTheFoyer: White House confirms deployment of commenters from the Daily Discussion Thread for March 25, 2026 to the Middle East.
[+9] u/Advanced_Divide_4641: Watching The Dictator and Idiocracy in stereo vision to find insider info.
[+9] u/benj760486: I'm rich again, 3rd time this month
[+9] u/No-Insurance100: Every bull has brain worms unless you're gambling intraday. S&P is down 5% since the war started
[+9] u/Send_Lawyers: Market non stop up since Monday. Strait still closed. Iran rejected ceasefire.
Not really sure how we got here considering everything is materially worse. But price go up.
[+9] u/weewoowewoooo: There’s so much bullshit and misinformation lmfao. Welcome to the new age of war. Just wait til the ai generation gets even better
[+9] u/M4roon: Iran: We will never surrender, we will cut all the oil alhamtoallah
America: Boots, bombs & bols forever I guess 🤠🤠 yeehaw
[+9] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Microslop going red on a solid green day. Fuck OpenAI and fuck this piece of shit company.
[+9] u/briballdo: I'm starting to realize that money is actually completely fake
[+9] u/Unhedged-Fund: bears make good points, bulls make money
[+8] u/Kickboy21: Didnt take long for MSFT to be a PIECE OF SHIT
[+8] u/Substantial_Policy39: Wait bulls you actually thought the war was over because mango said so? LMAO
[+8] u/jasperCrow: Come on and slam 📉and welcome to the jam come on and slam if you wanna jam now. 📉
[+8] u/Broad-Belt-5888: You guys do realize we could get off our asses and overthrow our government and fix all this shit for good right?
Spy would hit $1000 next year.
[+8] u/jraiv420: Iran not ending war rip bols
[+8] u/xxkupkakexx: so you telling me lying doesn't work??? WOWWWW....but but but you said war is over ?? why you sending 1000 troops and asking for 200 billion dollar
.........mf still gonna post a truth social during off market hour to move market over the wknd watchhh
[+8] u/ten7four: My greatest skill is buying a pumping stock to make it stop pumping, while the ones I don't buy continue to pump for months. Some might call it a superpower.
[+8] u/Soffatjockis: Buls don't seem to get that it takes two to taco.
[+8] u/Poor_Life-choices: Ill believe this pump when my shit turns purple and smells like rainbow sherbert
[+8] u/zangor: Why doesn’t Iran just coordinate like 5 tweets that say everything the markets want to hear. Then use the money from that market manipulation to further their real goals? 🤔
[+8] u/TheMightySet69: Iran demanding reparations is not bullish lol
[+8] u/Philthatman: This 1 minute candle movement is crazt
[+8] u/Play_Background: IRAN WANTS INT'L RECOGNITION OF AUTHORITY OVER HORMUZ STRAIT
Puts it is cause they will see shit
[+8] u/Valkorion335786: Pump already petering out lmao pathetic
[+8] u/Chancey004: Bears watched one Professor Jiang video and full ported puts 🤣🤣
[+8] u/ebitdasga: Do people complaining about MU realize how ridiculous it is that it broke 400b in the first place? Memory is cyclical, they will be practically giving it away once there’s a surplus. It’s not a long term bottleneck for AI
[+8] u/tombrady011235: Isn’t exchanging inspectors on irans uranium enrichment for lighter sanctions the exact same deal Obama negotiated?
[+8] u/tgff333: Spy pumping with every bad news. Makes sense.
[+8] u/All_FIREdUp: Agreed. I quite enjoy the intelligent discourse that occurs in this fine corner of the internet
[+7] u/Chlo-Motion: Orange Man's lies: Priced in
Failure of Iran negotiations: Priced in
Death of you and the universe: *Priced in*
[+7] u/anonkraken: Bulls barely have time to finish their shit-talking comments before it dumps LMAO
[+7] u/anerdknownaswill: The stock market is more fun when it makes sense
[+7] u/RjBloxks: MU going to the depths of hell today
[+7] u/RepulsiveDisaster671: #My MU 800 and SNDK 1400 calls expire friday. Am I cooked ?
[+7] u/MrT_IDontFeelSoGood: Are you telling me 🥭 lied to us? Again?!
[+7] u/Far-Requirement9180: Zuck was paying billions to steal workers from other Mag7 companies and now they are firing them, regarded as fuck lol
[+7] u/Fair_TQQQ: You guys realize the data wasn’t that good going into this war as well— right?
[+7] u/dljmonkeyboiz: Time to start running for the exit
[+7] u/skin_flute_player: GOOG lost all premarket gains 😂
[+7] u/ConstantSpace5809: All this fake ceasefire shit is setting us up for a circuit breaker when people realize paper oil cannot be delivered
[+7] u/mighty_sys_admin: I sold a TSLA call this morning, traded SPX options 3 times, ended up the same as if I just held my TSLA call
[+7] u/LURKER21D: hegseth just said "we negotiate with bombs"
iran knows that every time they come to the table they gonna get bombed anyway
[+7] u/Captain_Lameson: Just buy 658 p and 658c and relax
[+7] u/Yousoldmetohigh: Impressive pump. Ill screenshot it to remember tomorrow.
[+7] u/Guhbigly: Fellow bers, just ride the fake pump and scalp. No chance we can fight against the manipulating market. Puts Friday tho
[+7] u/Randomname1157: I swear it's retail buying all these dips providing liquidity
[+7] u/centered_chaos: Market is fucking nuts...insider trading is rampant
[+7] u/jlomohocob: The ultimate short squeeze on oil coming up.
[+7] u/Vegetable_Push6542: Interesting how we only get fake news from 🥭 when the market is red 🤔.
Tomorrow or Friday will be red so get ready for another fake pump.
[+7] u/Difficult_Beat_6094: holy market manipulation
[+7] u/sekak77: Theta days ruin everything
[+7] u/fathersucrose: Oh Barron what are you doing now
[+6] u/T-WrecksArms: LOL CANT WAIT FOR 🥭 TO POST SOME BS TO TRY AND SAVE THIS DUMP. NOTICE HOW THEY’VE BEEN GETTING MORE FREQUENT. SPY TO $630. IMAGINE BEING A DUMB BOL AND RELYING ON 🥭 LIES TO SAVE YOUR $$$
[+6] u/richardgallo24: This price action is making me Microsoft
[+6] u/pussinbuuts: MAG7 = BAG7
SAVE YOUR MONEY
[+6] u/iThinkiStartedATrend: I used to blast DONTTRUSTME by 3OH!3 through the loudspeakers on our truck as we blasted through the streets of Ramadi.
Imagine being an Iraqi getting blasted by a bunch of emo twinks
[+6] u/Me-Regarded: MU is the buying opp of the month
[+6] u/Familiar-Explorer814: “Iran does not accept a ceasefire,” an unnamed official told the news agency, which is close to the Revolutionary Guard.
The official said it would be “illogical” to enter a ceasefire deal with “those who renege on agreements,” an apparent reference to the US attack on the Islamic republic during talks over its nuclear programme.
[+6] u/Vikkio92: RKLB my beloved <3 <3 <3
[+6] u/ebitdasga: SPY is still red on the 6 month chart
[+6] u/vandalofnation: I cant believe this timeline. Cramer just said something brilliant!
He was asked, how do you know if oil prices are real and not being manipulated? He said look at xom and cvx (xle). Those started tanking when the iraq war was ending.
[+6] u/NewDawn101: What’s with all these labels like Supreme leader, the Ayatholla, gay, straight
[+6] u/AgitatedJump8459: Omg whats going on with AMD??? Im finally positive again.
Should I sell?
[+6] u/Samjabr: Some of you have got to stop thinking you are war experts. Stick to not knowing anything about stocks.
Better that way
[+6] u/aqjingson: Micron was diagnosed with Alzheimers today, sad
[+6] u/Snoo23417: Everything is fudged, don't worry. That said, calls.
[+6] u/Stock_Financial_Guy: Damn gonna need a big drop now
[+6] u/Prestigious_Suit_202: algorhythmically designed to fuck your calls and your puts
[+6] u/BigShmokeBuffer: 🥭 seen discussing ceasefire proposal with two kids in an ill-fitting trench coat
[+6] u/No_Cod972: The only people left in this market are people who like or don't mind losing money.
That's why the market will now go up.
[+6] u/billyd1984texas: Trump Faces Blowback on Easing Iran Oil Sanctions
President Trump once assailed the Obama administration for making cash payments to Iran. Now he supports sanctions relief that could give the country a $14 billion windfall.
[+6] u/DLD1123: They say don’t put all your eggs in one basket. What am I supposed to do carry two baskets? Three? Ridiculous. Where does the madness stop. All in calls.
[+6] u/Detonate-Ralph: I wonder how much money is being spent into making the market looking relatively normal
[+6] u/2020isgreat: Brussels plans carbon price brake as Iran war squeezes industry - FT.
lmao[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2036812330122510563)
[+6] u/iThinkiStartedATrend: Gives You Hell - All American Rejects
Solid song to lose money to
[+6] u/Irishbros1991: Iran rejects proposals and sets its own demands wow so shocked/s
[+6] u/maplessbastard: Also this whole shit boutta go red & I ain’t even a bear
[+6] u/Pretend_Bluebird_53: In all seriousness who the fuck is watching my profile and waiting for the exact second i buy puts and shooting this bs up
[+6] u/2020isgreat: Iran wants international recognition of authority over Hormuz Strait.[](https://x.com/financialjuice/status/2036809527815778480/history)
[+6] u/Send_Lawyers: This market blows. Gonna go wage slave until it makes sense again.
[+6] u/iThinkiStartedATrend: Every VWAP cross brings me closer to God
[+6] u/shindiggaa: sold my calls at +50%, done for today
[+6] u/TropicalOinkment: Am i the only one on outsider trading
[+6] u/shindiggaa: The marine expeditionary force has landed on the beaches of GOOG
[+6] u/mandoslambo: He will put boots on the ground before he even thinks about letting Iran turn the straight into a 90 billion a year toll booth
Gulf allies would never allow it
[+5] u/sconnie64: You have heard of looksmaxxing, Today I bring you lossmaxxing
[+5] u/Domefieldadvantage: Oil jumps up and down like it’s not a natural resource that needs to be extracted and relies on a precise supply chain
[+5] u/AgitatedJump8459: Oil rising, as it should
[+5] u/inappropriatetart: Pump this so I can afford to fill my car, have been waiting 2 weeks
[+5] u/orangeyougladiator: Was the MU community setup yet?
[+5] u/Creative-Package6213: Telling Iran to fuck off and accept a peace deal is like telling Ukraine to fuck off and accept a peace deal...
[+5] u/seeking-health: Green at morning means red by lunch
[+5] u/Claypool_Floyd: Sold my puts a little early, but a wins a win. Good luck today ladies & gents o7
[+5] u/e30jawn: Quick america tweet yourself out of this. Lmao.
[+5] u/memoryyyuh: 2026: How I learned to stop worrying and sell options.
[+5] u/zer0_chance284: nasa remembered it was cool as shit -> space up
[+5] u/sekak77: 30mins in and bols are red
[+5] u/ResidentPack4103: Thinking we are at peak positive news flow for the week...spy 650 puts is the move
So calls it is
[+5] u/rcantu314: Lunr straight vertical since the opening bell 🤌🤌🤌
[+5] u/Valkorion335786: Idk man
Pump looks sus
[+5] u/9tacos: Plowing back into a large MU position like a fucking retard
[+5] u/Sea_Condition_6999: Iran is the best thing for the market right now. Everyone is paying attention to the strait being open or not.
Meanwhile back in America:
Diesel at 5 freedom units per gallon
USA insolvent- 48 trillion in liabilities, 6 trillion in assets
CPI rising
Epstein files
Bears may be right, but day of reckoning not until September.
[+5] u/Own-Kaleidoscope-731: so iran say fuck you, still no oil, but stonks up?
[+5] u/TheGeoGod: Google rugged so hard 😂😂
[+5] u/Sea_Condition_6999: What I learned as a bear during this:
Market don't care, pump on tweets, slow bleed on bad news.
Long term: This will be really bad for everyday people. Companies already ate the tariffs for the most part. This shock is not insulated and there is no more profit to give.
[+5] u/benj760486: These seems totally sustainable no cap
[+5] u/Significant-Term6407: Why doesn’t Elon make 100 companies all worth $1.5T each and combine them into a super $150 Trillion dollar company?
[+5] u/Hot_Philosopher_6558: PUMP IT UP U GOTTA PUMP IT UP
[+5] u/imunfair: It's funny how salty and desperate the bulls are in here when the market has only slowly declined 5.5% from recent highs. Put on your big boy pants, this is nothing.
[+5] u/Independent-Tree-985: Class, look to your left and to your right
Statistically speaking, one of these two will go bankrupt and blame a public figure who is or was in office.
The other will go bankrupt and say they can do it next time, bro. Just a little more margin
[+5] u/Bravadette: Cramer just made a WSB reference its over.
[+5] u/xironically23: So trump lied causing my puts yesterday to evaporate and now we're dropping, might start doing chargebacks
[+5] u/Beazt11123: Clifford! Put that away!
[+5] u/andytobbles: it’s semi season motherfuckers
[+5] u/investgodbde: stonks gonna dip now bc iran wants war?
[+5] u/Bravadette: Still not enough to recover the past 3 months.
[+5] u/Daveonaltair4: did they hit the JJ abrams?
[+5] u/dybalapogba21: Official rejection and conditions set by Iran, so SPY 670 EOD
[+5] u/Bpallstar95: Muhhamad himself would have to be reborn and say there is no ceasefire for the market to believe it
[+5] u/mighty_sys_admin: my leap is up 7% since I finished trading 0DTE this morning, but it feels numb.
nothing like the rush of seeing your option be up 50%, down 20%, up 100% in the span of 10 minutes.
[+5] u/InterestingBase6286: He’s gonna announce a ceasefire
[+5] u/MaterialGuy007: MU Someone’s shorting MU! Get ready for a $100 jump! Fwd 12 mos PE 4.08
[+5] u/Burtonwurton: MSFT is such a bitch stock. Useless fuck.
[+5] u/michaelis999: this shit is just a daily pump and dump atp
[+5] u/mighty_sys_admin: holding when you're down is being a ruthless investor, right?
[+5] u/TraipseTraveller: Fuck. Afterhours and premarket hours are soooo fake and gey
[+5] u/Valkorion335786: 655 in the next hour
[+5] u/CulturalConclusion76: very healthy market movements
[+5] u/Fit-Guard-5063: IRAN: TALKS WONT HAPPEN UNTIL THE FIVE CONDITIONS ARE MET
[+5] u/rebel-capitalist: Even the small cap companies pumped except msft
[+5] u/Tomieez: What was the great gift - I wonder after this announcement. A golden statue or some crapto coin?
[+20] u/Dependent-Media-1857: just risked $2000 to make $50
[+18] u/dunk4899: This sub is absolutely worthless for actual investment advice but it’s value as a news feed is unmatched
[+17] u/fan_of_hakiksexydays: Just a reminder that every week that the Strait is closed is a ticking time bomb for an increasingly deeper economic crisis.
That's 20% of the world's oil that's not moving.
It doesn't look like just dropping bombs on Iran will get them to surrender.
And even if Tehran was in rubble, they can still hit ships with just Shahed Drones in some mountain and Drone Boats parked in a residential garage.
[+17] u/PropheticMurmurs: This is stable, solid looking price action indicative of a healthy market..
[+16] u/talaabo: According to reports, they sent the same maximalist 15 point as last June. They are planning an escalation, this is not a negotiation.
[+14] u/PalsRocksMyWorld: U.S. House Speaker Mike Johnson said Wednesday that the war in Iran is “wrapping up” and “the objectives have been met,” even as he described U.S. troop buildup in the Middle East as a warning to Iran.
“The buildup of troops is very different than boots on the ground,” said Johnson. “We don’t have boots on the ground. I don’t think that’s the intention, but I think Iran should watch that build up and they need to take note of that.”
BOOTS ON THE GROUND THIS WEEKEND. SEND IT.
EDIT: War also over, again. Apparently.
[+14] u/WSB_Dre: Spy is a pump and dump
[+14] u/angrybubblez: Didn’t see that move coming. Nice job bears
[+13] u/noahmfs: 1 of the 15 agreements is that Iranians have to subscribe to Amazon prime and watch Milania's movie at least 3 times and put a thumbs up! No wonder why they said fuck you 🥭
[+13] u/Ok-End-3213: Damn. Puts just printed
[+12] u/ReadyRaspberry8663: Maybe the US government should be restricted to only trading with settled cash
[+12] u/cashflow_: https://preview.redd.it/xk4t8pmwh7rg1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=979b3fa76f9d2ecf2940b01ae29ae909be372ad7
[+12] u/neilr3ddit: The market is going nuts holy shat…
[+12] u/BobsBurners420: I mean I guess this is to be expected when fraud and corruption is legalized and encouraged
[+11] u/Aggressive_Bit_91: 100% they are faking oil inventory data going forward
[+11] u/Largeshmarge: Now they are just fucking with us. They being the mice in my brain
[+11] u/patricktu1258: I am depressed as fuck
[+11] u/ratfukabich: Market needs to be taken out behind the woodshed jfc
[+11] u/Tautol0gic: https://preview.redd.it/caohvrork7rg1.png?width=1079&format=png&auto=webp&s=7c013fd55a333e1b113ecb3c15d931b013da78d2
[+10] u/Toys272: I WILL NOT BUY THE BAGS
I WILL NOT BUY THE BAGS
[+10] u/Guilty_Ad_8433: Midday rug pull t minus 1 hour
[+10] u/durian_in_my_asshole: Every time a stock doesn't move my way it's market manipulation
[+10] u/MindYoBusin3ss: I have had it with these daily pump and dumps
[+10] u/I_work_too_much: How the fuck is VIX not 60 the volatility has been absolutely violent for days.
[+10] u/Practical_Raisin_253: breaking: nuclear war
spy: best i can do is down 0.1 pct.
[+10] u/CoolEntrepreneur1: israel trying to blow up iran’s nuclear reactors again good luck bols
[+10] u/Historical_Cover8133: Oh, so calls - puts - calls - puts were the play today. Gotcha.
[+10] u/moosewithamuffin: Hopefully my grandkids will be able to see SPY hit 700 someday.
[+10] u/liquidtv78: we gettin fuckin harvested
[+10] u/dabblesest: lol folks in this sub can’t afford that shit.
Next you’re going to tell them they can buy options ITM!
[+9] u/McKoijion: A nearby private equity owned chain store I like has eliminated their biggest discounts. Prices are 10-20% higher across the board. That must mean the economy is booming and consumers can afford higher prices, right?
[+9] u/Dry-Operation6112: This place has no idea what's coming this weekend. It's so obvious. Why would they go through the effort to move all those military assets to the gulf by Friday if not to begin the boots on the ground invasion over the weekend? I am ready with my solar panels and solar batteries plus food and water for a couple of weeks. This inbred ape is about to skull fuck the global economy. This is the calm before the storm. Puts are cheap. Remember this comment.
[+9] u/Ok_Persimmon9849: [https://finance.yahoo.com/news/live/stock-market-today-dow-sp-500-nasdaq-rise-amid-hopes-of-us-iran-talks-oil-falls-below-100-133140032.html](https://finance.yahoo.com/news/live/stock-market-today-dow-sp-500-nasdaq-rise-amid-hopes-of-us-iran-talks-oil-falls-below-100-133140032.html)
Stocks rise amid hopes of talks, bruh even the finance journos are saying the only thing driving this up right now is pure hopium LMAO
[+9] u/EatinPussySellnCalls: Fellas, I'm talkin large NATURAL breasts
[+9] u/yushey__: Msft is really so fucking shit
[+9] u/Mysterious-Depth-211: if the nuclear plant has been hit, iran is going to hit the desalination plants.
this is fucking spiraling.
[+9] u/burnerAccountDuh24: This is without a doubt the hardest market for options I’ve experienced
[+9] u/Gom_KBull: What is the point of Donny's charade if his master is bombing nonstop?
So fucking stupid
[+9] u/Concerned_Fanboy: # The US army has raised the maximum enlistment age to 42 years old. Previously 35
[+8] u/52isabeast: This gonna dump again
[+8] u/lordricer: Give me 665 and I'll stop gambling for atleast 24 hours
[+8] u/NightWalkThrowAway: HEY BOLS, WHEN I BUY CALLS, IM BRINGING YOU ALL DOWN WITH ME. GET FOKED
[+8] u/pixi88: An Iranian military spokesperson mocked U.S. attempts at a ceasefire deal Wednesday, insisting that the Americans were only negotiating with themselves.
[+8] u/diefy7321: Bers heavily refreshing their X feed for more eyeran news lmfaooo
[+8] u/uwu_owo_whats_this: This market fuckin blows now. You might get one decent move early in the day and then MMs pin the price flat until close.
[+8] u/DumbNutter: I just bought calls. You're welcome bers
[+8] u/tropicalia84: # WE GOT EM BOYS
# MSFT NEW LOWS
# PILE ON THE PUTS
[+8] u/Gom_KBull: # [AND THEN HE SAID "SPY ATH EOW"](https://media.tenor.com/HxeSO1yA-gIAAAAM/goodfellas-wiseguys.gif)
[+8] u/burnerAccountDuh24: Every day some more completely batshit price action
[+8] u/camel_crush_menthol_: It's funny to me the market keeps freaking the fuck out in all directions even though the path to boots on the ground has been clear for 4 weeks. Iran owns the strait unless we topple everything. Drones with bombs changed everything.
[+8] u/CFBReform: $3.50 swing on spy in 10 minutes
[+8] u/DismalCreme4680: Iran calling US proposal ‘maximalist’ shows they are no Iraq or other countries US has gone to war with
[+8] u/baoenie: Why would you have a stoploss? Be a man
[+8] u/Artistic-Tea-8294: This has been the stupidest week so far
[+7] u/Solid_Direction_8929: ~~traders~~ gamblers
[+7] u/thewaterb0yyyy: This market is retarded. I am making money in this market. Therefore I am retarded
[+7] u/Fit_Combination6988: Didn't take a $450 profit on my msft calls because I want $500 and now I'm negative lol, serves me right
[+7] u/FunInteraction9796: msft is actually fried holy shit
[+7] u/vermilli21: I thought we were winning guys?! LMAO
[+7] u/Independent_Bag9914: I don’t care. Still not redownloading the app.
[+7] u/TurbodToilet: Stocks climbing back up and my calls aren’t moving. Cooked
[+7] u/log1ck1717: Msft fucking destroyed me man, Holy shit
[+7] u/HistorianMuch8963: \*IRAN’S BUSHEHR NUCLEAR POWER PLANT STRUCK AGAIN: PRESS TV
that war is far from over
[+7] u/WhoLickedMyDumpling: Down 6k to up $500... I'll take it 🫠
[+7] u/SovietPower777: Tired of all this insider trading, return bidenomics...
[+7] u/Colloquial: Bols : king retard tweets are sound investing
[+7] u/dorkstafarian: This market is high in stupid pills.
[+7] u/Pury101: The way some of y'all treat trading like a team sport or religion makes me think you actually have no money invested lol
[+7] u/Fun-Valuable-7355: I have more in common morally, spiritually & socioeconomically with the Muslim Bangladeshi father who just arrived who’s working as a delivery driver to survive than I do with any ‘based’ right wing billionaire. That’s not woke. It’s just basic friend enemy distinction —a concept which comes from Carl Schmitt, a right wing German thinker
[+7] u/Typical_Tank_4674: This is so fucking stupid. I legit stopped out of my puts 20m ago
[+7] u/Ok_Customer900: MU and MSFT competing for lowest share price. Who will prevail
[+7] u/McKoijion: > IRAN'S BUSHEHR NUCLEAR POWER PLANT HAS BEEN HIT ONCE MORE, ACCORDING TO PRESS TV.
Somebody shorted the market before the missiles were even in the air.
[+7] u/Wowmuchrya: Israel #1 enemy of SPY I see
[+7] u/swenau01: wait I don't understand the sudden dump and pump V at 11:15? what was that about
[+7] u/Longjumping_Top_5671: some of you aren't trading based on insider information and it shows
[+7] u/MakeResonableChoices: I think we are in the timeline when you see profits you take them and don’t look back 🤷🏻♂️
[+6] u/LankyLibrary7662: Spy either pump or dump! This flat line is killing everyone
[+6] u/_Fibbles_: Do you guys never take profits? Seems like so many of you are just riding things all the way up and then all the way back down again
[+6] u/Shot-Welcome-2822: next post will be, “We tried to negotiate with the third tier leaders but they refused our requests for peace so now we must achieve peace through the strength of our military. THANK YOU FOR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!”
[+6] u/CUbuffGuy: Ceasefire going well. Ignore nuclear plant currently in flames pls
[+6] u/Gom_KBull: lower highs, lower lows
[+6] u/Extension-Change-441: should be scalping these vwap bounces but im lazy and retarded
[+6] u/killainvest: Dude fuk 0dtes, I’ve been doing 30 days. Way less stressful
[+6] u/Stealthless: This market is a circus ran by a clown.
[+6] u/Maximum_Light409: The reason: Iranian nuclear energy base took a hit.
[+6] u/Taiyoken: Stoploss hunting at its finest
[+6] u/lupinle1: United States of Saudi Arabia!
[+6] u/HolyBubbiDiver: Dropping the 82nd Airborne into the Middle East right now is like YOLOing your life savings into 0DTE crude oil calls.
Only difference is, those paratroopers actually have a back up chute. Your back up is just an IOU from your wife's boyfriend and a permanent shift behind the Wendy's dumpster.
[+6] u/Embarrassed-Sky6890: If you’re not buying puts for Friday you must hate free money
[+6] u/Tay_Tay86: You may think the bears are being quiet. We are. We are still here silently watching bulls try to deny reality
You can do it little buddy 🐂
[+6] u/Oatmeal_Raisin_: Ive been wondering:
Do the markets react because people are stupid enough to believe 🥭’s posts or because we mainly think other people are stupid enough to believe them???
[+6] u/DismalCreme4680: This is scarier than a roller coaster ride
[+6] u/Accurate-Flow8078: LoL every other hour is "why pump" or "why dump"
[+6] u/InevitableAd2436: Load up on calls and bring your friends it’s fun to lose and to pretend
[+6] u/Awuxy: Iran has wholeheartedly rejected trumps 15 point plan proposed by Witkoff in Pakistan this morning
[+5] u/yushey__: Holy fuck MSFT FUCK YOU
[+5] u/skychief99: Waiting for the weekend to send boots in. And then the quagmire begins.
[+5] u/Ancient-Magi: I would buy puts but I don’t want another annoying tweet to wreck them
[+5] u/Crowdfundcrew: why does the main "daily discussion" header show the spy up 0.84% in the bubble, but down 0.01% in the chart? Why do they have different starting points?
[+5] u/lalyt93: Iran found ceasefire “unreasonable” *shocker*
Assemble the plunge protection team
[+5] u/vermilli21: This is a wait and see day
[+5] u/WeakPeak1015: IM JACKED TO THE TITS
[+5] u/_aliased: MSFT own employees dont want to use copilot. Xbox is dead. People see the backlash to Adobe's SaaS model. EU divesting from MS, China doesn't use MS... plenty of reason to be down 30%
[+5] u/Awuxy: This dude gets updates on the war via 2 minute explosion montages
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/white-house/trump-gets-daily-video-montage-briefing-iran-war-rcna263912
[+5] u/more_aero: I’m loading Friday puts
[+5] u/OkRecommendation1040: Spy pumping msft dumping what a fkn turd
[+5] u/dontslambro: IRAN'S BUSHEHR NUCLEAR POWER PLANT HAS BEEN HIT ONCE MORE, ACCORDING TO PRESS TV.
[+5] u/TranzitBusRouteB: MSFT piece of garbage, underperforms the sector every day, no one pays for Copilot slop
[+5] u/itsnotshade: Did Iran not get the memo that the war is over? Why haven’t they signed over all their oil rights yet?
[+5] u/Capt_Chickenpox: That is to be fair an impressive V, anyone care to explain what caused this lol?
[+5] u/angrybubblez: I lost in this trade but at least the second dump makes sense. If it went back to highs of day I would have made money but would have lost all faith I. Sanity and quit trading. At least today was my fault and I’m just a degen
[+23] u/delicious_oppai: Why do overleveraged retards put fake headlines here? Bitch we don't move the market 🙄
[+17] u/dogefool88: BREAKING - TradingView subscription cancelation at all time high now because charts don't matter anymore :)
[+17] u/slinkywheel: Is the SPY up today in the same way the bow of the Titanic was up before it sank?
[+16] u/DiamondHandzXD: Lol negotiating w himself. Puts
[+16] u/defordj: > U.S. brought back $100 million of gold from Venezuela, Interior Secretary Burgum says - CNBC
Seems barely worth looting a sovereign nation if that's all you get
[+15] u/Bitter_Ad_2500: So they are "wrapping up" things, but at the same time deploying thousands of paratroopers? Yeah more puts.
[+15] u/Substantial-Use-2867: CENTCOM is literally posting bombing runs on Iran in the last 30 minutes and you think there's going to be a deal this week? lmao
[+15] u/WarenBoffet: this war is gonna end with a regime change, just not the iranian one
[+14] u/millerlit: Breaking news! Trump is sending elite force of sharks with laser beams to defend ships in Strait of Hormuz passage.
[+13] u/sonofalando: The minimum wage in Pennsylvania is $7.25 an hour.
A regular Auntie Anne’s soft pretzel at the mall is $7.29.
Imagine telling someone an hour of their time is worth less than a pretzel.
[+13] u/ByahhByahh: You wouldn't download a Strait of Hormuz
[+13] u/Fine-Drummer2604: Iran’s response to the proposal. Let’s see how the world’s best deal maker is gonna handle this. I’m betting on the 5 goats a camel and the supreme leader with no legs.
* A complete halt to "aggression and assassinations"
* Establishment of concrete mechanisms to ensure the war on Iran does not resume
* Guaranteed and clearly defined payment of war damages and reparations
* The condition that the war is concluded across all fronts ard for all Iranian proxies throughout the region (which would require an end to Israel's attacks on Lebanon that are targeting Hezbollah).
* Guarantee that Iran can exercise of sovereignty over the Strait of Hormuz and its legal right to the strait must be recognized.
[+13] u/TheWilyVet: im so bad at this shit
[+13] u/Who_is_Your_Zaddy: I have better chance at getting hit by a spaceship than making money from this
[+12] u/SadWimp: Msft is dumping because Iran it was the greatest market for Windows XP and excel 2003. Imagine all destroyed.
[+12] u/Damerman: Very very strange that we aren't red.
[+12] u/caprividog: Another day, another CNBC argument of how regarded the WSB crowd is
[+12] u/AndItsThetaAgain: Oil about to tell Bessent to suck it
🍆
I’m so excited 🍿
[+11] u/Normal_Tap3021: Oil is up a fuckton and SPY still won't crash $1
[+11] u/TrickyDickCheney: My vibe meter says oil is going to pop and stocks are going to drill but this thing is so erratic I’m not betting on it
[+11] u/bigjimsribs: Impenetrable support line, unbelievable
[+10] u/KarlLachsfeld: Super Micro Scamputer is up while GOOG is down.
[+10] u/Tyneuku: Apparently "let me see" is a bad response to "my titties hurt"
[+10] u/TheSelfishMan: Al Jazeera - US Central Command has announced that its forces are carrying out strikes targeting what it described as the “the Iranian regime’s military infrastructure and capabilities”, that have threatened US soldiers and partners in the region.
Certainly bullish for an end to the war!
[+10] u/zestykite: so let me get this straight. my puts are wrecked because of BS ceasefire news that everyone knows wont happen, all while we are sending the most amount of our military to the region, with 5000 troops arriving before the end of the week. who is buying this shit??
[+10] u/myboywears: It’s pretty clear that tomorrow and Friday are red.
[+10] u/Tacosdonahue: does a strait of hormuz beat a royal flush?
[+10] u/fatmummy222: Did we learn fucking nothing from Vietnam and Ukraine? This is just the beginning. Put your fucking seatbelts on ladies and gentlemen.
[+10] u/BlackKnightsOptions: Talks soon is Trump's "the check is in the mail"
[+10] u/kcramthun: JD flys all the way over there and they just ask him how the couch compares to goats
[+9] u/LouieM13: Market is ready to drill
[+9] u/Tall_Helicopter_833: Oil is gonna rocket can’t artificially keep it under $90 a barrel forever
[+9] u/horseisahorse: >Pakistani source: Iran said they will respond tonight. Media reports say they said no, but we have no official confirmation. We are waiting. They are underground. communications are difficult.
>11:48 Mar 25
[+9] u/tastyfreeeze69: I’m going to give you’re mom a great gift I can’t talk about right now
[+9] u/doompkrs: if ur not buying puts today you just hate money
[+9] u/bigjimsribs: Man this is fucking horrible
[+9] u/BrownDog42069: so with the staging of marines near and on their way to kharg island, it’s pretty evident the us will launch ground forces right? or is it an intimidation thing
[+8] u/CD274: Private equity hitting withdrawals across the board = the rich taking money out = if they hit the limit they take it out of their mag7 stocks
[+8] u/B2BContinuum: God punishing msft for Gates debauchery in Epstein Island
[+8] u/Playful-Sympathy-576: When you start a fire that’s been kindling for thousands of years you should prob have a hose to put it out on standby.
[+8] u/DogNamedFloppy: If you thought MSFT was a bargain at $400, then you should be panic selling right now. Cuz fuck msft. 😭
[+8] u/Feedback_Entire: Come on Iran, go all in on 0dte SPY calls, announce end of war, sell, say sike and start firing agains, profit.
[+8] u/Alert_Performance_99: Do you guys think the trading robots have threads complaining about market manipulation too
[+8] u/dayne_stevenson: 🥭 accepts Iran’s ceasefire proposal, markets pump.. Friday 🥭 breaks ceasefire
[+8] u/pen15_club_admin: America fucked up by not sending any settlers in the early game to get more oil resources from the Mideast.
[+8] u/wright_on_: Why the fuckkkk did I buy MSFT calls
[+8] u/Buddha988: Is the straight whore in the room with us right now?
[+8] u/Tacosdonahue: shit's flatter than my natural bulge
[+8] u/jerm2z: We are winning so hard that we are negotiating with ourselves only
[+8] u/AndItsThetaAgain: Oh dam maybe we’re waiting on another terrible treasury auction
[+8] u/Defiant-Fee-7550: Claude just took my job for a second time 😦🤌
[+8] u/jez124: America is stupid, this market is stupid and everything is stupid.
If there is no ceasefire in sight this is all so shameless goddamn.
I dont quite buy Trump is going to escalate yet again because i dont think he's "brave" enough to tough out the consequences but then again maybe Market/Bonds/Crypto/Oil will all somehow be green when we invade Iran.
[+8] u/Any-Cartoonist-7052: Anyone else’s Schwab tweakin?
[+8] u/Jadenindubai: Flat as the earth today
[+8] u/delicious_oppai: This bitch on CNBC shitting on retail when they outperformed her last few years in comical
[+7] u/erx988: remember when rddt and other social media apps were dumping because openai announced sora? and now sora is dead lol thats all u need to know that nobody knows wtf is going on and its always been just trading on vibes
[+7] u/aftherith: Turns out Bill Gates was the ayatollah all along
[+7] u/Normal_Tap3021: SPY is holding like a god damn fortress. Just go below 656 and make me a happy man
[+7] u/Comprehensive-Eye547: The more fake pump means harder the dump
[+7] u/WingedScapula420: Is market closed for Good Friday next week?
[+7] u/basedpogchamp: Just managed to fill my tank for 30 bucks, should last the lawnmower a few weeks at least
[+7] u/FullCopy: - Bad news: Dave Thomas is not hiring.
- Good news: They’re serving Progresso at the soup line.
[+7] u/GMEThrowaway2: Two days ago in the daily thread there was some highly regarded lad ranting about some bad news that will tank Microsoft. I ignored the ranting lunatic but wish I had listened and now I can’t find the alleged comment.
I just bought a single lottery MSFT put because I am convinced it’s all insider trading but now I am the ranting lunatic.
Does anyone know why it’s actually dropping? Was this mysterious shitposting figure an insider or a crackhead?
[+7] u/pmotiveforce: Hmm.. not feeling it today. Usually I try to scalp the daily moves but this garbage seems stuck until whatever is going to happen next happens.
Need more absurd ridiculous fucking disgusting market manipulating lies from 🥭.
[+6] u/Free-Championship828: That funny moment when Israel bombed the Gaza Strip yesterday with a ceasefire in place since October. This Iran war is in the early stages boys buckle in
[+6] u/Oldschoolhype2: 0dte in this market? NOPE
[+6] u/Round-Huckleberry570: Just filled up my work truck $6 for diesel then my pickup $4.90 for 87 I’m paying California prices with no benefits of being in cali thank you Obama
[+6] u/Playful-Sympathy-576: How does 🥭 plan on getting the uranium if he doesn’t put boots on the ground. It’s obviously heading that direction. This war will last for years. We’ll be fighting for control of the straight for months.
[+6] u/TrumpChildOnahole: OK but why the fuck did it even pump in the first place
[+6] u/puffinnbluffin: So fucking regret not selling msft at $410 a few weeks ago fml man
[+6] u/Leading-Future6691: Sideways action just to dump
[+6] u/CD274: Noon = the manipulators are out to lunch
[+6] u/Any_Life_6178: USA is insolvent, like🫵 https://fortune.com/2026/03/23/us-government-insolvent-fiscal-crisis-fix/
[+6] u/Slabbed1738: Trump sending troops to the middle east but don't worry we are working on a deal reminds me of Putin amassing troops on Ukraine border and saying its just military drills lol
[+6] u/Tacosdonahue: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+5] u/jaboyles: This volatility is driving me crazy. You only get about 5 minutes to lock in gains before shit reverses entirely.
[+5] u/stupidber: Whats that? The greenest fucking thing you ever seen.
[+5] u/Wild_Cheesecake_6630: Fucking Microsoft! I will lost my port due to this piece of shit!
[+5] u/yeedub: Oil going up again we fuk
[+5] u/puffinnbluffin: Msft is never getting back to my entry. Selling $440 csp into earnings was the biggest financial mistake I ever made aside from meeting my daughters mother
[+5] u/bilingualbunny: Leftover sushi for breakfast
[+5] u/Screamdaditty: Bears r truly fucked
[+32] u/MrNo_Balls: how many times can we win a single war?
[+25] u/Cantthinkofacoolnam: Would love for the market to crash right now.
[+23] u/soad1331: Iran mocking and humiliating 🥭 and I'm here for all of it 😂
[+20] u/Whybother456: US: ceasefire?
Iran: No
\*stocks rise\*
[+19] u/LevelSatisfaction838: If you invested in the S&P on September 11, 2025, you are no richer today over 6 months later.
[+19] u/hey-coffee-eyes: > Iran warns its ready to open new front in Yemen, close Bab al-Mandab Strait with Houthis
A second Strait has hit the news cycle
[+18] u/Beagle001: Imagine being in that press. Waiting and waiting, knowing you're just about to get lied to and used to spread propaganda. While you're racking up 20 dollars an hour to park.
[+17] u/Small-Opening-4319: Looks like we going down next fellas
[+16] u/Alarmed_Awareness165: I’m sure the guy whose family was blown to smithereens will still want to negotiate guys
[+16] u/GTS980: "president 🥭 does not bluff" hahahhahaahahhahahah clown ass woman.
[+15] u/bigmeatbag: Why market acting like Iran is lying about not giving a fuck about a ceasefire?
[+14] u/NoSort9076: # More than 50,000 US troops in Middle East, CENTCOM says
Sure, "winding down". It'll be over by Sunday.😒😒😒😒
[+14] u/Vegeta9001: She's on her rant about Democrats again, I guess that's the end of the important news from this conference.
[+14] u/ihopethisworksfornow: HOLY FUCK I’m back folks
Reddit fucking suspended me for 7 days for saying Colbie Cailatt’s voice lit *my* pubes on fire when *I* was younger.
Bunch of fucking bullshit
[+13] u/TJMBeav: I want to make a move but sometimes no move is the right move
[+13] u/Hot-Ambassador8740: This is such a fucking joke. Market keeps going up on some bullshit copium
[+12] u/Beagle001: oil quietly sneaking north
[+12] u/Lapidated_Llama: MSFT is officially the bag 7 team leader
[+12] u/Expensive-Big-8725: The factory did a great job with Leavitt
[+11] u/rkillaaa: 0dtes get decay fukt
[+10] u/nknk_3: Just remember sometimes no trade is a great trade
[+10] u/SchwiftySchwifferson: Stop losses are for pussies
[+10] u/Iwubwatermelon: "Objectives are met...but we sending soldiers for sightseeing" - Mike Johnson, probably
[+10] u/greyenlightenment: and down it goes. this strait will stay closed
[+10] u/Gristle__McThornbody: Proud of myself for not buying something stupid in the past hour.
[+10] u/EasyBoard9971: crazy we’re just going to be in the exact same position as we were saturday night but somehow spy is higher
[+10] u/FriendlyGold1717: Mag7 stocks feel like shitcoin7 lately
[+10] u/justlosinmoney: SEND THIS SHIT TO THE SHADOW REALM
[+10] u/Specialist-Map-5602: It’s so obvious that bears are more in control today here lol
[+9] u/SlartibartfastMcGee: I’ve been pretty bullish, but this does feel like it’s ready to slide to flat for the day.
[+9] u/darthjarhead: This market, especially today sucks ass. This shit is so choppy with big swings up and down.
Trading is hard enough, and it does not help knowing at any moment a profitable position is one tweet away from getting wiped out.
[+9] u/UpwardCharterhouse: Can we get a -1% candle please?
[+9] u/No_Current3675: Day 26 of the excursion.
[+9] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: 1dte puts locked and loaded
[+9] u/Grey-59throwaway: Oil calls and SPY puts is the way
[+9] u/SleepyxCapybara: Next leg down coming right up!
[+9] u/PhysInstrumentalist: I think 🥭broke the market
[+9] u/Sawgambler: I bought puts so we could moon
[+9] u/killerbeeswaxkill: I would buy puts but I already got fucked in the ass this morning.
[+9] u/Beagle001: I think oil is about to go up....
[+9] u/TheOriginalBIG: Bro why is she yelling and so off putting
[+9] u/kwarknagel: That's nice Karoline, but what about the pedophiles?
[+9] u/LeupMeisterGenral: Why am I already up 200% on a single Nokia leap I didn’t commit to. That’s a whole $60 I’ll have you know
[+9] u/justlosinmoney: Damn I really lost money on puts I looked away for a little bit and I’m negative this copium is crazy
[+9] u/Wide_Neighborhood_49: Taco be like I'm about to spout some bullshit and 60% of people and 100% of algos will believe it just cuz. Lol
[+9] u/boomerzoomers: Why is her delivery or every word so strange.
[+9] u/Kirko_Cousins: Little reminder for myself..
^(DO NOT TRADE THE MIDDLE OF THIS RANGE)
[+9] u/johndsmits: *"Iranians Reject Offer for Cease-Fire but Signal Openness to Talks"*
headlines like this says the market is viewing Iran as the aggressor: so '*pump it up'*
[+9] u/PretendAgency2702: "If only there had been any signs"
- Bulls tomorrow and friday
[+8] u/BGMilan: IRAN DEMANDS 1 TACTICAL NUKE FOR RESEARCH PURPOSES ONLY
[+8] u/PopularCut4124: There once was a man from Nantucket whose dick was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped down his chin, if my ear was a cunt I would fuck it
[+8] u/JakeSal10: Spy daily chart with a rare pattern: the droopy cock
[+8] u/astrawberryandakiwi: Can the market crash already? 98% dry powder and I’m bored
[+8] u/GTS980: Cannot stand Karoline Leavitt holy fuck stab my pee pee with a hot iron poker please.
[+8] u/PunisherR1: China trip delayed to May, is mango scared of Xi?
[+8] u/No-Improvement3164: CNBC has nothing better to talk about than Retail Traders
[+8] u/Abe2025: So for a while we were able to say bad words but I get flagged for saying the f word just now. Whats going on with this subreddit?
[+8] u/pleasestoptalkin: My hot coworker always walks into my office right after I ripped ass
[+8] u/bigmeatbag: Iran is still trying to figure out what gift Donnie thinks they gave him. Part of Donnie's 5D chess to confuse the enemy and everyone else.
[+8] u/Weekly_One8412: >almost no economist on Wall Street right now is talking about a recession. Even Nouriel Roubini, who has earned the nickname "Dr. Doom," told us he's "not anticipating a recession right now."
From yahoo finance
[+8] u/spurkulator: bought SPY puts exp 3/30. if these dont hit, im done. for now
[+7] u/CoopCrossing: Pump this fake ass meat stock so I can feel something again
[+7] u/shortgamegolfer: In times like these you need to go back and watch the Always Sunny episode “The Gang Solves the Gas Crisis”.
[+7] u/Fine_Specialists: Market makers are humbling us for sure yall.
[+7] u/LarsTarkas: Theta forever until markets run out of hopium
[+7] u/whydouhatemecablegod: hey kid, wanna buy a call
[+7] u/WarmCan3034: Wow. Whoever owns msft, 🙏. This ain’t for the weak 😭
[+7] u/zuziannka: What is even goin on
[+7] u/ixtail: White House briefing today, should have started at 1:00 PM EST. Be careful regards
[+7] u/yeahyoubored: this is dumping later 👇🏻
[+7] u/djln491: So everyone is just waiting for tweet?
[+7] u/humanoideric: Msft about to shut down everyone's PCs unless they buy
[+7] u/humanoideric: [ Removed by Reddit ]
[+7] u/bringkiteback: I wonder how hard George Carlin would go if he saw the shit show we’re living in
[+7] u/sailortyx56: Pentagon to send the 1st Brigade Combat Team, part of the 10th Mountain Division, which is built for sustained, full-scale combat to the Middle East-Telegraph
Lol
[+6] u/unanymous2288: Nah, it’s just delayed don’t fomo
[+6] u/StonksInvesteur: NO DEALS!!! SPY TO ZERO
[+6] u/Ok_Traffic9867: My final straw is a GTA 6 delay because of war
[+6] u/kenathen: lmao . 2 seconds dip bought up right away
[+6] u/spudbro00: Microsoft hitched its wagon to OpenAI is the problem, CEO needs to be fired for that move alone
[+6] u/rand_walking_charts: SPY plans to drop when oil at 120? 😂😂😂
[+6] u/Beagle001: Do people listed to this and just believe it? Like Fox Boomers? Who just listens and believes it?
[+22] u/TarrifJacksonJr: Reporter: Can you tell us what the misinformation is about the 15 point plan is?
A: Theres a lot of fake news floating around and you should ask this administraion
Reporter: I just tried to ask this administration!
lol
[+15] u/Vocabii: it wants to dump so bad just take a shit
[+14] u/Historical_Bother274: Which part of the Big Short are we at now? When will Margot Robbie start to explain oil futures in a bathtub?
[+14] u/ComfortableWolf779: They are deploying 80,000 troops lol
[+12] u/poffa-: Is she really 28? Being in contact with his farts must have some aging effects
[+12] u/ChillinInTheCorridor: God she is so insufferable
[+12] u/ConsiderationKey1658: Just blew up the toilet at work and the whole floor stinks 🤣
I work from home 😩
[+11] u/AppleJuiceTwo: YOU ARE THE PRESS SECRETARY. YOU SHOULD HAVE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS
[+11] u/Historical_Bother274: The rugpull about to happen will be something for the history books
[+11] u/L3GASEE: My god, I can't wait to see her trials
[+11] u/Le_Flight_Chief: Jesus this thing is pegged to 658. Just dump bro
[+11] u/SuperSix: Do the boomers realize that the IEDs that fucked people up in Iraq fucking FLY NOW AND CHASE YOU???????
[+10] u/OkAlternative7705: fucking FULL PORT CALLS RIGHT NOW US JUST WON THE WAR AND TOOK OVER THE WHOLE WORLD. WE ARE SO BACK THAT WE WON IT 5TH TIME.
EDIT: THIS IS NOT A FINANCIAL ADVICE, MY ONLY FINANCIAL ADVICE IS TO SEND ME MONEY.
[+10] u/essdii-: Iran only attacks between 430pm-9am est time. Peace talks are usually held between 730-830 am est. ceasefire every Monday thru Friday 930-4 pm est.
[+10] u/Same-Brilliant2014: Big guys loading puts slowly to not spook VIX and have it spike too soon
[+10] u/Historical_Bother274: Why market is positive
[+10] u/No_Bat5023: NO ACTUAL WAY
I got short, it pumped.
I flipped long, then it went back down.
I got short again and then it PUMPED even higher.
[+9] u/CaaCCeo: Drop back to 654 would be godly
[+9] u/Aggravating-Donut568: holy pin to 658 Jesus
[+9] u/BrokeDickRizz: It’s going to stay range locked to take as much money from both sides as possible. You made money if you picked correctly last night.
[+9] u/Zeppu: They can't even make a fake pump worth it
[+9] u/iAmGrimTV: So Karoline Leavitt brags how no one's heard from Irans new leader but somehow there's talks in place??? Lmao
[+9] u/QuarkTheFerengi: Smells like exit liquidity today
[+8] u/Coffeewin: MSFT and GOOGL competing to see who can reach the Marina trench first
[+8] u/TheWizardOfFries: We all know this is bullshit. They can't keep this up
[+8] u/jnas_19: I’m bulletproof, nothing to lose
[+8] u/JeronimoPearson: That woman never says anything
[+8] u/enc-nyc: 15 Point Plan
1. I am great.
2. America is Great.
3. But I'm greater.
4. I would like to have that prize.
5. I've never been to that island. Period.
6. Maybe just a little.
7. I barely knew the guy.
8. After a peace deal free copies of "Melania" movie to all Iran theaters.
9. No toll booths on a strait.
10. No uranium. Old-fashioned coal only. And yes, no windmills.
11. No Hiroshima or Nagasaki, kapish? No Pearl Harbor either. No surprises. (Bibi, stop adding)
12. Reparation in a form of endless supply of Trump coins.
13. This list is boring. You are boring, Marco. Is it 15. already? No?
14. Thank for your attention to this matter. President DJT.
[+8] u/IllustriousPiano562: Big drop before close, magical pump on tweet/headline/rumor ah. Do it all again tomorrow.
[+7] u/NotMyMainLoLzy: I’ll say this. Oil is now as cheap as it will be for some time.
[+7] u/Awkward_Ad_5102: Even Schwab is fed up with this market, and is deciding not to work
[+7] u/Issa_vibe74: MOM DAD I SOLD CALL AND BOUGHT PUT AT THE TOP
[+7] u/Impressive-Joke-3119: Glad I didn't trade, looking extra theta choppy today.
[+7] u/mmjI: lmao US can't end the war without paying Iran or just deleting them gg
[+7] u/lessoninprogress: This is the most regarded market of all time.
[+7] u/madeenahjyasu: THIS PRICE ACTION IS DIABOLICAL 🗣️
[+7] u/EntrepreneurOld7858: Laughing at my coworkers crying about their F250s and Tundras because theyre dropping $100+ on their gas tanks.
Haven't had to fill my Kia in three weeks and I still have 160 miles left in the tank.🤌
[+6] u/Puzzleheaded-Image-4: Trump's puts/calls loaded. You will find out how many billion $$$$ he made later.
[+6] u/LeBhikariLe: look what they did to my boy MSFT
[+6] u/Pretty_Dragonfly_716: Oil is like the giant turd stopping me up and preventing me from having a good clean colon
[+6] u/Ok-Organization1796: TSLA is sucha shit company I wanna see it drill just because I hate it.
[+6] u/ComfortableWolf779: There are legit no peace talks they are sending in 80,000 troops and asking for 200 billion lol this war aint ending soon
[+5] u/bearhunter429: #Microsoft might be the most bankrupt company in the world LMAO🤌
[+18] u/BillyShears2015: Spy is down over 4% over a month and bulls still have the audacity to jack off in the corner saying shit like “LMFAO bears”
[+18] u/ThermalChaser: Marines schedule to arrive Friday at 4:01pm EST
[+18] u/conoremc: In hindsight, it is my fault and I am indeed retarded for investing in companies like MSFT and GOOG that have 35+ billion in quarterly net income with net margins of 30-42% and consistent double beats instead of Walmart with PE at 44, 4.2B net income and 2.2% net margin
[+18] u/Shoddy_Ad897: Market opens in 29 mins
[+18] u/I-ProGamer-I: So we Pump because the ceasefire plan was rejected? I lost the narrative.
[+16] u/Paul_Robert_: Microsoft Office 360 - ❌
Microsoft $360 - ✅
[+16] u/Excellent-You-3873: I like big dumps and I cannot lie
[+14] u/TripleChen_LLC: I feel tomorrow will be a red day unless it's green
[+14] u/radishr: This idiot on CNBC is "taking 🥭 at his word". I should really just stop watching CNBC...
[+13] u/posicrit868: Dam 🥭 really has convinced the markets this will end in 5 minutes and as oil price creeps, green market entirely held up by fomo.
[+13] u/derprondo: Daily reminder that U.S. Secretary of Education, Linda McMahon, Vince McMahon's wife, repeatedly referred to A.I. as "A-One"
[+13] u/AlphaHarmony: how does this not dump...
[+12] u/Only-Cranberry-4502: Apple is really the best company, no try hard ai or anything like that just pure ripping off customers with a logo which is what capitalism has always been built on
[+12] u/ArtFickle541: Who holding their 0dte put to expiration
[+12] u/Bazzer82: Imagine fucking up this bad. Only way for the US to get out of this with any credibility left whatsoever is to actually go into Iran and occupy, which is very fucking unlikely to happen and would still take a long time whilst fucking up almost the entire global economy. Absolute regards.
[+12] u/torokunai: "Iran has sent a warning to the United States that it will carpet bomb its own territory to attack any American troops landing there, according to diplomats from a third country who passed on the threat to Washington."
Saw this from a mile away.
[+12] u/YOLOdollhair: Iran foreign minister talking shit.
Waiting for the mango tweet. This shit is coming down.
Opened a short on NQ. Will mash the gas if this breaks 24380 level.
[+12] u/would-rather-read: he has a speech tonight at 7:20pm. uh oh
[+11] u/SoftFaithlessness768: This is going to dump so hard in the last 30 min
[+11] u/IndividualSea2881: Mark my words, bombs are dropping again as soon as markets close Friday.
[+10] u/IlinistRainbow6: my portfolio has been destroyed
[+10] u/WorldWide_Wiz: WOW. Good luck to whoever has the balls to day trade in this market.
[+10] u/alldawgsgotoheaven2: Fakeout. Red by close.
[+10] u/BarbellPadawan: If you don’t know what you’re doing, neither does your trading counterparty
[+10] u/elvee61: Budget meetings were held today at my place of employment.
It looks like a hiring freeze and layoffs are back on the menu, boys.
[+10] u/shanus94: Power hour this, sour hour that.. how about quiet hour?
[+9] u/rd26: This shit looks terrible. Feel like Bessent is out there using tooth picks and scotch tape to hold up this house of cards between 🥭 tweets.
[+9] u/illicit_FROG: My bet is on Iran... I don't care how well armed you are, the people in charge are still retarded
[+9] u/BiblicalAss: ever wake up and realize you wasted the last 15 years of your life?
[+9] u/Naive-Suit3916: It'll dump after the close
[+9] u/SylphCo93: Bulls: Hahaha stupid fckn Bears.
Bears: Hahaha stupid fucks Bolls.
Market: ———
[+9] u/A55BAG: So the real barrel is trading at 200$ in Asia and 140$ in Gayropa.
What does it take to make the US Treasury to cover it's short on oil?
[+8] u/JohnsHopkinsSimp: Just spoke with the CEO of stocks, googl & Msft will be delisted tonight
[+8] u/hubblebubble7: Dear mr gpt, taco here. I am trying to manipulate the oil price, give me 10 options how to do this
[+8] u/Big-Refrigerator1899: dont quote me on this, but I think the market may go up or down
[+8] u/sonianevermindX: 20 min until the next scam headline
[+8] u/necarpenter417: Without trying to be a misogynist, she is a rotten bitch
[+8] u/ikasey24: My puts aren’t putting and my calls aren’t calling
[+7] u/_pout_: You're supposed to be able to hold onto at least some stocks. This market is absurd.
[+7] u/illicit_FROG: algos getting real good at catching falling knives
[+7] u/wave_action: There’s some messages saying they’re fucked right now
[+7] u/TestingLifeThrow1z: "War has been won"
Strait of Hormuz: :\\
[+7] u/Ok-Thought-9960: I feel bad for the aide thats gonna have to tell 🥭 he wont be able to get out of this via chapter 11.
[+7] u/d3sp: scalp 1st 10mins of each day and gtfo or lose to theta
[+6] u/Numerous_Two_102: Believe it or not calls
[+6] u/mixtape312: Look at all those flat 4h candles. Dealers basically eating premium for the last 5 days.
[+6] u/Tillfatfire: I want her to suck my dick 🥹
[+5] u/f0xinaround: Dawg I thought the war was over.
[+5] u/River_Sandhu: Please let me know if Karoline says anything remotely interesting, my god I can’t put myself through listening to her
[+17] u/Ok_Cry7572: Every Mag 7 stock is now in a double-digit drawdown from ATH
AAPL -10%
NVDA -12%
GOOG -15%
AMZN -15%
TSLA -20%
META -20%
MSFT -30%
[+12] u/1098duc_w_the_termi: We have this one dumb motherfucker at work rn that has been talking to Claude to do all his work. In an open office environment, I can hear him from my office saying shit like “create an excel table with items 1, 2, 3, each with 3 sub groups… blah blah blah, amend table to include blah blah”
Annoying af but he’s a genius. Just leaning back in his chair showing leadership how to use AI.
[+12] u/Madsen13140: Today could have been an email
[+10] u/jazzyjjcups: So Iran just rejected the 15 point peace plan and WTI is back at $91. Why is the market still green here?
Exactly what pops the bubble? Wrong answers only
[+9] u/YouDontKnowDino: It’s gonna be flat the rest of the week. Boots on the ground Friday at 4:01 PM EST. Ceasefire talks going well Sunday night
[+9] u/hackernight7: Surprised it hasn’t crashed further
[+9] u/Key-Employ-2049: I used to look at after hours and think about my future profit or loss but I learned now that it doesn’t matter what it looks like now tomorrow it’s gonna be different
[+9] u/AlarmedPelican: how do you do, fellow bulls?
[+8] u/aa73gc: How much longer can they suppress oil? It just keeps popping up back over 90 like Barney at Moe's bar
[+8] u/Frosty_Promise8050: So, if Iran gets all natural rights to the straight of Hormuz. We are fucked. So is Europe. Boots are going to the ground folks. No matter who is PRES.
[+8] u/WendyDumpsterFire: Fuck you Schwab I’m suing you piece of shit
[+7] u/Q4shm0ney: can we just dump like a normal stock market
[+7] u/somewhere_cool: I already did it so I recommend not
[+7] u/NiceJobSon: Lower highs, lower lows. Psychologically speaking of course.
[+7] u/KroKart100: Loaded to the tits with puts rn
[+7] u/Ecclesiastes510: Rug pull is imminent
[+7] u/VincenteThomp: Sell my puts -> market immediately starts dumping.
Okay bro, you got me…
[+7] u/Devastaytah: Boots on the ground tomorrow
[+7] u/hudson701: nothing burger. 3.30pm sell-off again.
[+7] u/Extension-Ad917: The markets headline fatigue going through the roof
[+7] u/RaybanQA: Scott Bessent US Treasury secretary must be buying stock holding the market up.
[+6] u/Ok-Professional-8355: We are going to be so fucked when PE and PC defaults go up even more. I think that's when the actual circuit breaker happens, the war is just speeding it up